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File: 00 - lame story.jpg (1005 KB, 1600x1200)
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Every story has an ending. Boy finds girl of his dreams, boy gets together with girl. Boy finds multiple girls of his dreams, boy ends up with harem who decidedly love-hates him. Boy settles with girl not-of-his-dreams, girl stabs boy in the chest with a cooking knife. You, however, are not that boy. You are not sure whether to be thankful or angry about that. But the fact remains that you are said boy's best friend and quite frankly, you are rather tired of it. That is not to say that you don't love him like a brother... because you do. But the moment he ends up with a girl, the story will be over, the curtains will draw, and everybody that you know and love will disappear forever into a sea of bad spinoffs and sequels.

So it is your duty as the main character's best friend to cock block him so you all don't get sent into story-oblivion. God, this fucking sucks. Your greatest deeds can be amounted to making sure your best friend stays a virgin. Basically, you are an asshole. You pray that when you finish high school, this little charade will be over and you can get on with your own life. But for now, you and your best friend are – and will – be tied to the hip.

Let's get this show on the road already. You are Satoshi and you are in a...

>Harem show. Your best friend is so dense he could have been spat out of the Large Hadron Collider. The sack of bricks he is, he trusts you completely.
>Romcom show. You have to figure out who the main girl is and stop her from getting together with your best friend.
>Slice of life. You have to keep your best friend from getting together with a girl, but you cannot upset the tone. Keep it low key.
>>
>>45860965
>Harem show. Your best friend is so dense he could have been spat out of the Large Hadron Collider. The sack of bricks he is, he trusts you completely.
>>
>>45860965
Fucking excellent idea.
>Harem show. Your best friend is so dense he could have been spat out of the Large Hadron Collider. The sack of bricks he is, he trusts you completely.
>>
>>45860965
I will stick with Harem Show. Leaves more options open for shenanigans.
>>
>>45860965
>>Harem show. Your best friend is so dense he could have been spat out of the Large Hadron Collider. The sack of bricks he is, he trusts you completely.

Yeah, this. Even if he does get with someone, we might have a happy ending of our own with the secondary girls.
>>
>>45860965
>Harem show. Your best friend is so dense he could have been spat out of the Large Hadron Collider. The sack of bricks he is, he trusts you completely.
>>
>Slice of life. You have to keep your best friend from getting together with a girl, but you cannot upset the tone. Keep it low key.

whoops well there i go
>>
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Dear God. You always knew your friend was a lady-killer, but really? A harem? Not only do you have to go out of your way to keep him single, now you have an entire mob of women wanting his pants down. Too bad there's only one of you. The only thing that you can be assured of is that your best friend is a total half-brainer. You love the dude, but man, that guy can be oblivious to the stupidest shit sometimes. Here's him walking out into the street right now. Yep. That's him. Your best friend, Hiro,

“Hey!” he calls out to you. Always the morning person. “Break's over. Ready for school and stuff?”

You slap on a wistful smile. “Yeah man. I'm ready to sleep in class for another year, haha. I just hope our homeroom teacher's a bit more forgiving this time.”

Hiro frowns. “You should pay attention more. You know that the big exams are coming up soon, right? It's only our second year, but we shouldn't slack off.”

You toss your bag over your shoulder and give him a shrug. “Fine. Don't say that I'm not trying my best, 'cause I'll show you.” If only he knew.
>>
Now, you aren't the type to brag but you think of yourself as smarter than the average guy. You just aren't an overachiever. Nevertheless, it doesn't really matter because no matter what you do, by some force of nature, you always get worse grades than your best friend. You know your role in this story is to be a foil to Hiro, but seriously? Why can't you be the smart best friend or the reliable best friend? Instead, you trip and fall into the worst scenarios possible. Literally. You fly face first into the ground – and you expect to hit the pavement but instead you're met with soft flesh. You immediately jump back – fucking hell. You know where this leads.

A girl with icy blue eyes and a contrasting red face stares daggers at you. She dusts herself off with a bit more strength than necessary. And now, she's facing your way.

You have some dignity left. Why not get rid of it now?

>Grovel and apologize.
>Casually go for a morning jog.
>Talk it out.
>Play out the pervert role... even if you don't want to.
>>
>>45861541
>Play out the pervert role... even if you don't want to

But I do want to
>>
>>45861541
>Casually go for a morning jog.
>>
>>45861541
>Play out the pervert role... even if you don't want to.
>>
>>45861541
>Casually go for a morning jog.
We must go. Our people need us.
>>
>>45861541
>>Grovel and apologize.
If we're gonna be the dumb comic relief, we might as well establish it now.
>>
>>45861541
>Grovel and apologize.
>>
Need a tiebreaker vote. Will get to writing as soon as it drops on us.
>>
>>45861541
>Play out the pervert role... even if you don't want to.
>>
>>45861541
>Casually go for a morning jog.
>>
>>45861541
>Play out the pervert role... even if you don't want to.
>>
>Casually go for a morning jog.
If we act like every other sidekick ever, we will not succeed in our mission. We have to do what is not expected of us.
>>
>>45861796
>Casually go for a morning jog.
>>
>>45861824
Agreed. Let's go for a run. Get out of our role for a bit.

>Casually go for a morning jog.
>>
Calling it now.
>Casually go for a morning jog.
>>
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>Casually go for a morning jog.

Now. Your role as the best friend isn't glamorous, but if anything, you now have strong legs. Ever since primary school, you've been running away from the girls that Hiro managed to gather up like a herd. No matter what, somehow, someway they manage to find a way to hate you. You sigh and remind yourself that this is a harem show. It's played for laughs. You force a dopey smile and stretch your legs.

The blonde haired girl squints over at you. “Now, what are you doing?” She folds her arms and takes a step forward.

You aren't exactly eager for physical violence this early in the morning, so you do what you do best. “Oh, is that the track club calling me? Excuse me, I have a PR to beat.” You casually sprint as hard as you fucking can past the blondie and jump down to the road next to the riverbank. Before making a break for it, you yell out to Hiro, “Yo, I'll catch up with you in homeroom!”

You hear something like an “Okay!” and a high pitched scream of frustration coming from his direction. But you're not going to stop. And you don't stop until you see no blonde hair in sight. Panting to catch your breath, you topple over on a nearby bench. You stop wheezing when a shadow is cast over you. Somebody's blocking the sun.

“Sup, shortie?” A female voice. You open your eyes and wipe the sweat from your forehead. The track captain, Yuko, is busy giggling over you. “What, did you set a new record today or are you that eager to join the team?”

“Oh, shut it for a second,” you groan. “And for the record, everybody's a shortie compared to you, you enormous freak of a woman.”

“I'm hurt,” she says, wiping away a fake tear. “But anyway, you're joining the track team this year, yeah?”

>Whatever. Say yes to get her off your back.
>Tell her to get lost.
>Say that you'll think about it.
>>
>>45862017
>Say that you'll think about it.
Running's boring
>>
>>45862017
>>Say that you'll think about it.
Odds are, we're gonna need the extra physical strength to run around foiling the MC's many dates.
>>
>>45862017
>Whatever. Say yes to get her off your back.
>>
>>45862017
>>Whatever. Say yes to get her off your back.
>>
>>45862017
>Whatever. Say yes to get her off your back.
We will need to be fast for this
>>
>>45862017
>Whatever. Say yes to get her off your back.

Let's get this back on track
>>
>>45862017
>Whatever. Say yes to get her off your back.
Sure. If she doesn't hate us, then that's one girl in the story that can help us.
>>
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>>45862225
>Let's get this back on track.
>on track
>track

Anyhow, called.
>Whatever. Say yes to get her off your back.
>>
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>Whatever. Say yes to get her off your back.

“Yeah, sure. I'll talk to you about it when club applications start, okay?” You wave her off. Having regained your breath, you stand up and get to walking back to class. You still have a few minutes until homeroom. “Until then, there is no mention of track or anything about running.”

Yuko punches you straight in the shoulder. Uh, fucking ow? “Right on. And you should definitely get Hiro to join as well! I'll owe you one if you do?” She gives you a little wink.

“Maybe if you stop punching me, ugh.” You rub your arm where she just socked you. Man, that girl can really pack a punch. “

“Yeah well, no promises until you get Hiro to come along!” She laughs boisterously and takes off running towards the school.

“Ever heard of walking?” You yell, but you're a hundred percent sure Yuko didn't hear. You skirt around the entrance to the school and wait for Hiro to come in. You know that he's a slow walker and that he shouldn't be at the entrance until the first bell rings. And right on time, you see your best friend coming along with Yori.

Now, Yori is both Hiro's and your childhood friend. And, like Hiro, she trusts you completely. She's been tagging along Hiro's side ever since she met the two of you. The girl is timid, fragile, and frankly, she's like a puppy.

“Satoshi!” Hiro waves, pulling you in by the shoulder. “I was worried you weren't going to make it on your first day.”

“What,” you chuckles. “With how slow you walk? I could be wearing bricks for shoes and I'd still be here faster than you.” Eyeing the students filing in, you ask Hiro in a low voice, “And where's the blondie?”

“She stormed off.” With a shrug, he says, “I dunno why though.”

“Blondie?” asks Yori.

You shake your head. “It's nothing. Let's head in to class now, yeah?”
>>
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Once homeroom begins, you're stuck in school. You don't have anything better to do since your studies don't actually affect your grades. You would have ditched once lunch comes around but since it's the first day, you have to see whether or not Hiro stumbles into a sea of girls from the get-go.

“Now,” begins the homeroom teacher, “I'd like to introduce you all to a new transfer student. Everyone, please meet Patricia.”

Patricia? Wait.

And, as you were half-expecting, the blondie comes in. “A pleasure to meet you all, I am Patricia. Please take care of m–” Once her eyes met yours, she freezes and glowers at you. Then, turning away, she continues. “Erm, please take care of me.”

“Thank you, Patricia.” The homeroom teacher leads her to the only seat available. The one right next to you.

Patricia immediately spots this and pleads to the teacher, “Are there no other seats?”

He shakes his head. “I'm afraid not.”

In a desperate attempt, she asks, “Can I be moved?”

“The seats are already assigned. I'm sorry, but you will not be moved until the next quarter.”

She nods slowly and takes her seat, rubbing her temples.

>Make with the awkward silence.
>Maybe an apology is in order.
>Give her a dumb smile. Let her think what she wants.
>Better pay attention in class.
>>
>>45862646
>Better pay attention in class.
>>
>>45862646
>Make with the awkward silence.
>>
>>45862646
>Maybe an apology is in order.
>>
I've just noticed an interesting thread between all our interactions so far.

If I'm correct in my assumptions this should make for an excellent plot twist. Keep up the good work OP!
>>
>>45862646
>Give her a dumb smile. Let her think what she wants.
Why pay attention when we're destined to fail anyway?
>>
>>45862730
Care to share with the class, anon?
>>
>>45862646
>Maybe an apology is in order.
We're a buttmonkey but we don't have to be a jerk.
>>
>>45862820
so far, it seems like our character is the one falling into stereotypical harem shenanigans. at least with two of the 3 girls we've encountered so far anyway. that said, yuko seemed very interested in our friend, Hiro, joining, and our mutual childhood friend, yori, was described as clinging to hiro. at the very least, blonde tsundere ojou sama seems to have fallen in our court since we bumed into their nether regions and not our pal, hiro.
>>
>>45862835
>Maybe an apology is in order.
>We're a buttmonkey but we don't have to be a jerk
Pretty much this.
>>
>>45862864
meant to say that yuko was very interested in hiro joining the track club there. im pretty bad about run on sentences so please excuse them
>>
>>45862864
This. We're basically triggering protagonist flags even if we don't seem to be the designated protagonist.
>>
>>45862960
>>45862864
We still lose when the story ends.
>>
>>45862973
Not if it's the kind of story that ends in an epilogue
>>
>>45862960
if nothing else, the blonde student seems to be getting forced onto us. any chance OP can throw together a simple chart of class seats and such. Are we in the window seat second from the last row? if so you fucked up and its already obvious we are the harem mc
>>
>>45862973
If our friend is the designated protagonist, usurping the trappings of his role seems like a good way to prevent that. After all, if this is HIS story, it ends when HE scores. We'd have a hard time destroying his plot threads outright, but if we steal them I think we're in the clear-- I mean, a story doesn't end when the comic relief hooks up, right?

I guess it depends on whether the story will follow the chosen protagonist, or the de facto one.
>>
>>45862646
>Maybe an apology is in order
>>
>>45863138
>I mean, a story doesn't end when the comic relief hooks up, right?
Who knows when it never happens?
>>
>>45863366
It often does, you just need to look at the right stories. It's pretty common in stuff like commedia del'arte to have the comic relief servants hooking up as a couple in the process of trying to get their master and mistress to hook up.
>>
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>Maybe an apology is in order.

Yeah. You should probably say sorry. If anything, she's stuck next to you for the rest of the quarter, so you might as well make amends, right? Well, you'll tell yourself that anyway. You sneak a glance at Patricia, who still is glowering right at you. “Patricia,” you weakly say. “No, Patty. Look. I didn't mean to fall on top of you. I don't do that. I don't even know you. It's just that I'm a bit of a klutz.”

Under her breath, Patricia hisses, “Klutzes don't squeeze and grab. And don't call me Patty. Please.” But she heaves a deep sigh and drops her glare. “However. It would be demeaning of me to keep a grudge. So, if you could introduce me to your friend of yours, we could call it even and throw the water under the bridge.”

“Who, Hiro?” You point over to your best friend. The guy's nodding off already. For a lot of talk about “doing your best,” he's not one to talk is he? “Why?”

“Well,” she blushes. Red flag. “N-No reason.”

“Yeah, I'll get around to it,” you say. “Maybe during lunch break.”

The teacher clears his throat and points his finger straight at you. “Satoshi. Could you stop running your mouth and share with the class the answer?”

You sneak your English book on top of your desk. The answer is an English idiom that you've heard a thousand times over in an audiobook. But, you have to keep up with the charade. “Uhhh, I forgot my book, haha. That's why I asked the transfer student for some help. I may have stolen her book from her.” The class titters and snickers at you. You reply with a goofy smile and a shrug.

“Just sit down already,” sighs the teacher. “Someone else please explain the problem.”
>>
You wait until the teacher turns his back. Leaning over to Patricia, you throw her your book. “Thanks, transfer student, for the help.”

“What, you don't need your book?” Patricia raises an eyebrow.

“Nah. I don't need a book to study English. I learn better by listening. Speaking of, you... do have a book, right?” She turns away. Well, whatever. “Then you can keep it. But now we're even and having me introduce you to Hiro is owing me a favor, okay?”

“...Fine,” she grumbles. Nice. Now you don't have to start a new flag with Hiro.

The rest of English class passes by uneventfully. The second class, gym, is probably your favorite time of school. You only have to worry about getting your hour's worth of exercise. Today is volleyball. You quickly change into your gym uniform and head to the gymnasium.

About ten minutes into the class, you hear a shriek from across the courts. Looks like Shina, the class rep. She's been gunning for Hiro ever since junior high. You almost feel sorry for her, because she gets way too flustered around your best friend. Right now, she's holding onto her ankle and wincing like mad. And Hiro, being the guy that he is, naturally volunteers to escort her to the infirmiry. Aw, fucking hell.

>Three's a crowd.
>Take her there yourself.
>Get a girl to escort her there.
>>
>>45863454
>>Get a girl to escort her there.
That way, we can keep an eye on the guy ourselves, and ensure he doesn't get with someone else while we're gone.
>>
>>45863454
>>Get a girl to escort her there.
>>
>>45863454
>Three's a crowd.
This sounds the most fun. Think of the possibilities. Something will definitely happen.
>>
>>45863454
>Get a girl to escort her there.
>>
>>45863454
>>Get a girl to escort her there.
>>
>>45863454
>Get a girl to escort her there.

If we go, we'll end up distracted by this girl and Hiro will get the Nurse on him.
>>
>>45863454
>>Get a girl to escort her there.
Not on my watch Hiro.
>>
>>45863454
>>Get a girl to escort her there.
No puss for you.
>>
Bump.

Am I the only one that wants super powers into play?

This already seems neat but I'm defintely in if turns full shonen.
>>
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>>45863811
I'm hoping we become Zoom and ruin everything for Hiro like in pic related. We just gotta join track or train extra hard.
>>
Just remember guys, we need to cock block him, while still maintaining the series going. If the series ends its Game Over, so that means the girls need to get close to our best pal, but never get the D. If we block everything we wont be interesting enough to keep the world going.
>>
>>45863907
give them the D ourselves?
>>
>>45863907
So basically, we have to ensure that this is just like every harem anime ever. Except maybe Tenchi Muyo.
>>
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>Get a girl to escort her there.

Yeah, there is no way that you're going to let the two of them alone. In fact, you aren't even going to let Hiro step foot in that infirmary. Only bad things happen there. “Hey, Hiro. I think a girl should accompany Shina to the infirmary. You know, it's only right. You remember the last time you went to the infirmary with a girl?”

He blinks. “Not that I recall. But you're right. I think a girl should go and escort her. Could anyone help?” A girl steps up for the task. Hiro helps Shina up and leaves her to the girl. As they shimmy out of the gymnasium, you breathe a sigh of relief. Bullet dodged.

“Gym's closing up!” yells the teacher. “Bring in the equipment! Today's cleanup duty will be... Hiro and... Patricia. The rest of you are dismissed in ten minutes!”

...Cleanup duty? Oh. Oh no. They are already heading out to the back storage room. The one that locks from the outside. You know exactly what will happen. But how do you get there? How do you stop them? Wait. Wait wait wait. You have an idea. A terrible idea. You are going to hate yourself.
>>
“Taro!” You yell to the other side of the court. “One last round?”

“Yeah, sure!” He yells back. “But this decides the set! You lose and you're buying me a coffee at the vending machine!” Taro reels his arm back and serves. You return the ball with a high arc. You can tell by the glint in his eyes that he's ready to smash – and smash hard. You act like you're reaching for the spike, but at the last second you drop your arms and let your face smack straight into the ball.

HAHAHAFUCK. Some blood drips from your nose. You quickly sniffle a bit and pinch your nose. “Hey teaaaaacher! Can I go to the infirmiry!”

He takes one glance at you, gives you a big look of disappointment, and sends you off. Immediately, you head straight towards the storage room. You press an ear to the door. You are greeted with a mild concussion as Patricia bangs on the door loudly. Ow, your head.

“Hello!? Is anybody out there? We're trapped inside!”

Hmm. Hiro is trapped inside. And so is Patricia. You could let them free, but then that would mean you'd have to follow Hiro some more. Or you could join them and keep a close watch on Hiro... but Patricia would probably hate you.

>Join the party.
>Let them out.
>>
>>45863952
>You have an idea. A terrible idea.

We trip and accidentally de-pants the girl. Then help our bro clean up whilst she flees in shame
>>
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>>45863854
I would honestly prefer any powers. Even powers that with our best friend.

Until Hiro has powers purposefully meant to beat our powers.
>>
>>45863970
>Join the party
>>
>>45863952
>...Cleanup duty? Oh. Oh no. They are already heading out to the back storage room. The one that locks from the outside. You know exactly what will happen. But how do you get there? How do you stop them?
Methinks we're gonna have to recruit some help. How did we become aware that our world would end if Hiro found a girl? Can we expose others to the terrible, terrible reality they live in?

>>45863970
>Let them out.

We were gonna keep an eye on him anyway.
>>
>>45863970
>Join the party.
>>
>>45863970
>Let them out.
>>
>>45863970
>Join the party.
Grab some spare equipment that was just lying around to have a good excuse.
>>
>>45863970
>Let them out.
>>
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Tiebreaker vote needed.
>>
>>45863970
>Let them out.
>>
>>45863970
>>Let them out.
>>45863990
Knowing anime tropes, Hiro probably has some kind of god power or a null powers power.
>>
>>45864153
Join the party
>>
We're letting them out, everyone.
Called for:
>Let them out.
>>
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>Let them out.

As much as you like getting locked in a stuffy room with a person that almost hates you, you are inclined to let them out because it's the right thing to do. Also, you wouldn't let your best friend be locked in knowingly. That's not cool, most of the time. You inhale. In a loud voice, you exclaim, “Oh, is somebody there?”

“Yeah!” shouts Hiro. “Oh, is that you, Satoshi? We're stuck inside the storage room. Could you let us out?”

“Sure thing.” You turn the knob and let the two out.

“Thanks, man. You really saved our butts there.” Hiro, giving you a pat on the back, smiles in appreciation. “But why are you here? I thought the gym teacher told you all to leave?”

“In ten minutes, remember?” You lie straight through your teeth. “They told me to go check up on you guys because you didn't remember after five. Now we better hurry and go to the lockers, or we'll be late for our next class.”

“Oh, you're right!” Hiro looks around in shock, immediately heading back to change. Patricia, silently brooding, remains where she is.

In a hushed voice, you ask, “Disappointed?”

“A-A-About what!?” She squeaks. “I wasn't disappointed about anything!”

“Save your stuttering,” you curtly say. “We gotta get to class.”

“I...” Patricia trails off. “...I hate people like you.”

“I'm sorry to hear that,” you rub your nose. The bleeding seems to have stopped, but damn if it doesn't hurt like hell.
>>
>>45864591
>wizardry preserved
>>
Next class is math. You... hate math. If there were anything that Hiro could beat you in, it would probably be mathematics. You don't like numbers. But all you have to do is suffer through one more class and it'll be lunch break. You just pray that nothing will happen.

“Class, on short notice, we will be bringing in one last student. From class 2C, she will be here with us for the rest of the year. Please welcome Nina.”

Oh. My. GOD.

“Hello, everyone. I am Nina. I am currently Hiro's potential wife candidate. Please treat me with care.”

AND HOW.

The entire class goes silent. And then immediately erupts into a cacophony right afterward.

“Class!” The teacher squawks. “Please settle down!” He bangs his desk in order to get the class to shut up. “Ahem. Unfortunately, we do not have enough desks today, so a chair will have to do. Is that okay with you, Nina?”

“Yes,” she nods. She brings her chair and scoots it right next to Hiro's desk. As in, she's almost on his lap.

Uh.

>Graciously volunteer your seat.
>Graciously volunteer Patricia's seat.
>Offer to find a desk from another classroom.
>Something else?
>>
>>45864637
>Graciously volunteer your seat.

Ho's away from bro's please
>>
>>45864637
>Graciously volunteer your seat.
And ask Hiro to help us in Maaaaaath
>>
>>45864637
>>45864697
>>
>>45864637
>Graciously volunteer your seat.
>>
>>45864637
>Graciously volunteer your seat

Either she's crazy, or she knows about the meta-narrative and has some kind of play for the end-of-the-world hookup. This is going to be interesting.
>>
>>45864745
She's like the Anti-MC
This is going to be a difficult batte
>>
>>45864697
Seconded.
>>
>>45864768
I think, if she is aware, ultimately she simplifies our job, since she seems fixed on being The Girl. If her goal was just to end the world, she could spend her time stymieing out efforts without making a play for Hiro herself, just blocking us long enough for the narrative to work itself out and for him to get with one of the countless girls on his own.

She must have some other goal that's only accomplished by being The Girl herself, and if so, she's going to have to block all of the other potential girls as well as pursuing Hiro in her own right, which will take some of the load off of us, letting us focus more of our energies on her. Neither of us wins if some other girl gets Hiro, after all.
>>
>>45864637
>Graciously volunteer your seat.
>>
Guys, I know what we must do.
We must Yaoi route.
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>>45864950
But it's....hmmm. Make it non-sexual until we finished highschool
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>>45865010
>Hiro is too stupid to know what gay is
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>>45864950
>>
>>45865031
Gay Way confirmed
>>
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>Graciously volunteer your seat.

“Hey, you know what? I'll volunteer my seat. I think that'd be for the best. We can't have someone who moved classes feel unwelcome, right?”

The teacher shakes his head. “There is an arranged seating order–”

“I mean, with all due respect, having just a chair isn't much of a seating order. This will be just for today, right?” You give him the most innocent grin you could muster.

“Very well. Miss Nina, please head over to Satoshi's seat.”

“Yes, sir.” With a small frown, she looks over to you before silently stalking over to your seat. You switch places with her and take your prize: a fucking chair with no desk. Hanging your bag on the seat, you resign yourself to your fate... and scoot a few inches away from Hiro.

Your best friend whispers over to you, “That was awfully nice of you. Good work!”

You scoff. “Please. It's because I have no idea what we're learning right now. What the heck is Gaussian elimination anyway?”

“That's easy,” he replies, looking proud of himself. “I'll show you my notes after class.”

“Yeah. Same deal? I'll help you with English.”
>>
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After another 40 long minutes, math is finally over. You learned something about... matrices. Maybe. And now, it's the moment you've been waiting for. Lunch time. You got yourself a packed lunch. It's just rice and egg with some soy sauce, but that's all you need, really. It was worth getting up early to make this. You get up from your seat and steal a table adjacent to Hiro. Fuck the chair. Yori joins, apparently coming from her class. Really, she follows Hiro everywhere. Guess that's how it is being a childhood friend.

You click your chopsticks, looking over to her. “Hey Yori. Joining us for lunch again?”

With a timid smile, she nods. “I'm really nervous in my new class. They all seem scary.”

She's so helpless. “Why don't you say hello and make some new friends? You're a cute enough girl. Don't people want to talk to you?”

Blushing, Yori twiddles her thumbs. “I ran away.”

Hiro pats her head as if she were a little dog. “Don't worry, Yori. Work up the courage next time. I'm sure you'll do fine.”

“I'll do my best,” she says, more so to herself than to you and Hiro. Poor Yori. Basically, as the childhood friend, she's more at a disadvantage than the other girls when it comes to Hiro.

“Yeah, do your best,” you reply, mouth full of rice. Thinking to yourself, maybe it's for the best that she's worse off than the other girls. Unlike everyone else, Yori's a good friend. And you don't really want to stop her from doing what she wants to do.

Hiro quickly finishes the rest of his lunch, wolfing down the sides with no effort. Yori's lagging behind. She's always been a slow eater.

Hmmm.

>”So, Yori, what are your plans for today?”
>”Hey, Hiro, ever think about joining the track club?”
>”We should check out Yori's class.”
>”Oh yeah, Hiro, who is that Nina chick?”
>>
>>45865498
>>>”Oh yeah, Hiro, who is that Nina chick?”
>>
>>45865498
>”Oh yeah, Hiro, who is that Nina chick?”

we need intel
>>
>>45865498
>”Oh yeah, Hiro, who is that Nina chick?”
>>
>>45865498
>”We should check out Yori's class.”
>>
>>45865498
>”Oh yeah, Hiro, who is that Nina chick?”
and then
>”So, Yori, what are your plans for today?”
>>
>>45865498
>”We should check out Yori's class.”
>>
We are not playing this properly guys.
We are supposed to try and be nice to girls so we can then pit them one against the other, ensuring a structure-induced equilibrium.
>>
>>45865636
Yes you know what happens?

You get episodes where they start working together and then after enough of the they all decide to share

We cant be too obvious
>>
>>45865708
We're not being too obvious, I just think we could throw a bone to the girls.
>>
>>45865745
Throwing a bone is literally the last thing we want to do. Because there is only one bone they want, and it isn't one we want to give.
>>
>>45865745
If it looks like were to winning first girl position they will start paying more attention to us

We need to work thur the idiot best friend angle
>>
>>45865498
>”Oh yeah, Hiro, who is that Nina chick?”
Know our enemy to defeat them!
>>
“Oh yeah. Hiro, I have something to ask.” You pause until Hiro's finished chewing. “So who is that Nina chick? Do you know her?”

“Yeah.” He wipes his mouth with a napkin. “I met her last year during the festival. We worked together to set up all of the stands outside. She is a really nice girl! I... don't really know what she meant by 'wife candidate' though. I was surprised as you guys.”

Yori tilts her head. “Wife... candidate?”

“I don't know how to explain it, to be honest.” You shake your head at Yori. “Some girl comes along and–” Wait. You probably shouldn't tell any of the girls yet. It might make them do something stupid. Really stupid. “Said weird stuff. Yeah.”

Hiro adds, “Yeah, really weird like how she–!”

You slap your hand over his mouth. “– Moved over from class 2C. I heard that class is real smart. I wonder why she moved over?” Although you know exactly why.

Yori mulls over your words. “Maybe she wanted an easier time in academics?”

“Yep. That must be it.” You nod vigorously, releasing your hand from Hiro's mouth. Luckily, he doesn't really care. Or get it.

Hiro stares over to the window. He creases his eyebrows in worry. The clouds are gathering over the school. “Oh yeah. Isn't it supposed to start raining later? Good thing I brought my umbrella.”

“Same,” you reply.

Yori nods. “I brought my umbrella today, too. We should all walk together, the three of us!”

“Okay. We could all hang out at Hiro's house or something.” You grin. You know his parents are out traveling or something. That means you can barge in without much of a complaint and see if Hiro gets into any shenanigans.

“Satoshi, come on,” he laughs. “You can't just invite yourself over to my house!”

“Your mom would have let me in if she were here.” That's how it is as the best friend.

He pauses. “Well, you're right but...” Hiro looks over to Yori for help.

She lowers her eyes. “I wouldn't be against it.”

“Two against one, Hiro. Sorry but your house is ours.”
>>
The rest of class today was busy. Thank God. You can feel Nina staring into the back of your – and Hiro's – head.

The rain is outright pouring by the time you get your shoes. Damn. At least your umbrella's strong. From the corner of your eye, you can see Hiro being dragged along by Shina. You inch closer over to them.

“You have an umbrella right, Hiro!? Don't misunderstand, I just forgot mine!” Shina averts her eyes, her face burning up red.

“Yes, that's fine. You can take mine but I have to go somewhere with–”

“Come on!” she whines. “You know I'm weak to the rain. And besides, my ankle's still pretty banged up. Hiro. Please?”

Oh no. Don't say the P-word. Anything but that.

Hiro exhales. “Alright. But just this once, okay?”

Damn it. You know that if you follow them, you're going to leave Yori behind again. But... this isn't looking good.

>Follow them.
>Stay behind for Yori.
>>
>>45866230
>Follow them.

Sorry Yori
>>
>>45866230
>>Stay behind for Yori.
>>
>Follow them
Sorry Yori, the world is calling. It says don't fuck this up me for me.
Different from the guy above by the way.
>>
>Stay behind for Yori.

I understand why we shouldn't, but our cause shouldn't ruin our life we're trying to protect, and an important part of that is compromise.
>>
>>45866230
Follow them.

Keep your eyes on the prize.
>>
>>45866230
We gotta stand behind for Yori and turn her into our Yandere. A girl that will turn into a beast to protect the boy she has a crush on. A beast so effective yet so hideous that the boy won't be able to reciprocate her feelings.

Yes. Stay behind and brainwash Yori.
>>
>>45866230
>Stay behind for Yori.
>>
>>45866230
Just ask them to wait for Yori with you?
>>
>>45866230
Do we protect a smile, or our bro? Dammit.
>>Stay behind for Yori.
>>
>>45866411
We are trying to cockblock our best friend, not be an edgelord. God damn.
>>
>>45866230
>Follow them.
Observe what happens to see the powerlevel of madness were facing
>>
Calling in 5 minutes unless tiebreaker.
>>
>>45866569

>>45866313
>>45866339
>>45866382
>>45866534
>Follow

>>45866319
>>45866360
>>45866411
>>45866427
>>45866451
>Stay behind
>>
Don't fuck this up guys. What matters more, your childhood friend or the world existing?
>>
Rolled 2 (1d2)

>>45866569
1-follow
2-stay
>>
>>45866569
>Stay behind for Yori.
>>
>>45866195
>Follow them.
In the end, this is a winning move. Yori gets hurt and we stop Hiro from destroying the world.
>>
One encounter won't be enough to destroy the world.

He's a harem MC, none of the girls can win until he has to choose from the group.
>>
Called. You're all staying behind for Yori.
>>
>>45866783
>world ends

But at least we get a girl
>>
>>45866824
>But at least we get a pawn

FTFY
>>
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>>45866851
why would we want one of these?
>>
>>45866968
Man that was a good movie
>>
>>45866968
Pawn, anon, pawn.

Do you think we can stave all girls off by ourselves? We need help, and the underdog is the best candidate.
>>
Idea!

We're worried that we'll be destroyed by spinoff's right. what if as a side objective we make sure that if we fail the spinoff will be about us!
>>
>>45867037
Not to mention we do have the advantage of Hiro's shields of obliviousness to help us out as well. We can afford to detach ourselves from him from time to time.
>>
>>45867075
>We're worried that we'll be destroyed by spinoff's right. what if as a side objective we make sure that if we fail the spinoff will be about us!
That's an idea, but has it happened before? That said, I'm not much of an anime watcher, mind you.
>>
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Anyone else up for going full kumagawa-mode?
>>
>>45866625
Can someone screen capture this for future quests? On shitty mobile.
>>
>>45867217
Hell no

Kumagawa became a main character who still couldnt get a good ending
>>
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>>45867246
>>
>>45867338
Thanks Anon.
>>
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>Stay behind for Yori.

You know that it's in your best interests to follow the two of them. You're going to lose sight of them soon. But... can you really live with yourself if you leave Yori all alone? You know that she wanted the three of you to walk home together. And to leave her all alone after such a promise... well. She'd cry, that crybaby. Fuck, you're a softie. You lean your umbrella against your shoulder. Waiting for the soft tip-tap that only Yori's tiny shoes could make, you turn over and greet her with a wave. “Hey.”

“Hi, Satoshi!” She beams. Ugh. “Where is Hiro?” Yori says, wagging her imaginary tail.

You foster a weak smile. “He's out helping Shina. Got dragged away by force. But I think he'll be back later.”

Yori taps a finger to her chin. “I would have thought Shina would go home right after. Her ankle looked terrible.” She smiles. “Still, her house isn't far from Hiro's. Maybe we could all meet up?”

Wait. Her house is... close to Hiro's. Holy shit. You can still make it. “Okay, great!” You grab Yori's hand and drag her along. “If we run, we could still make it!”

With her free hand, she opens her umbrella. “Wait, Satoshi, wait! W-What is going on?”

“I'll explain later! Just follow me!” You make a mad dash over to Hiro's house. With Shina's ankle hurt, you're sure that you can still catch up in time.
>>
You rush through a couple of streets with Yori trailing behind. You're fine, but Yori needs to take a break. She's... not exactly the athletic type. You slow down and let go of her hand. “Keep walking, you're doing fine.”

“I'm... hah,” she wheezes. “I'm not sure if... the rain... is good for running.”

“Sorry, but you should exercise more. You have to have more stamina than that.” Your shoulder's getting a little wet from angling your umbrella. “You'll never make the track team like that.”

“S-Sorry.” Yori lowers her head. She caught her breath, but still, she keeps her face down.

“Is something up?” You ask. “I don't want to hurry you, but we don't have a lot of time.”

She raises her head – two worried eyes stare directly at you. “Satoshi, I miss the times when we could all smile with you.”

You chuckle. “What are you talking about?” You flash her your teeth. “I have the best darn smile of the second years.”

“I-I mean...” She hangs her head again. “N-Never mind.”

You sigh and pat her head with your slightly damp hand. “Don't sweat it, Yori. Let's just go.”

In about a few more minutes, you make it towards Hiro's umbrella. You close your umbrella and toss it into the nearest trashcan. “Now, Yori,” you whisper. “You do the same.”

She quivers. “I... I like this umbrella.”

“Yori,” you gently say. You take her umbrella and hang it onto the nearest tree. “Sorry.”

And, with a heavy heart, you shout loudly and run towards Hiro... and squeeze straight between Shina and “Aaaaaah, holy crap. The rain is crazy. Yori and I were scared you left without us, so we panicked and forgot them by the entrance. Yori? Yori!”
>>
Yori tearfully huddles under Hiro's umbrella. “Um, y-yeah.”

Shina grabs at your necktie and hisses, “And why did you think it was a good idea to get your wet butt between us!?”

You try to soothe her, motioning for her to settle. “I'm sorry, but I needed to get out of the rain, if only for a little bit.”

Holy fuck, you were cutting it close. Crisis averted, maybe. Even if Shina is a bit of a prude, the umbrella is a dangerous weapon.

>As thanks, why don't you join us for a get-together at Hiro's house?
>Tease her away. Talk to her about sharing an umbrella.
>Have Yori talk to Shina.
>>
>>45867455
>As thanks, why don't you join us for a get-together at Hiro's house?
>>
>>45867455
>>Tease her away. Talk to her about sharing an umbrella.
>>
>>45867455
In it and harras her.
>>
>>45867426
>Tease her away. Talk to her about sharing an umbrella.
Sorry this meeting is for osananajimi only.
>>
>>45867455
>>45867455
Invite her to Hiros house but do so by hitting on her.
We are going to establish our selves as womanizer extraordinaire to cock block our friend.
>>
>>45867426
>“Satoshi, I miss the times when we could all smile with you.”
Fuck, she knows.
>>45867455
>>As thanks, why don't you join us for a get-together at Hiro's house?
>>
>>45867455
This >>45867727
>>
>>45867727
>Girls generally hate us.
>womanizer extraordinaire.
That will never backfire on us!
>>
>>45867797
It's our way to scare them away and keep the MC away from them in any case because his bro wants to tap that and is pitiful.
>>
Calling soon. Sadly, I need to leave to go do something and I'm afraid it may take the rest of the evening. I will do maybe one or two more updates and leave that as the end of the episode.
>>
>>45867880
Please dont forget to archive it!
>>
>>45867880
Got a twitter?
>>
>>45867880
This is a great idea for a quest, thanks for running it.
>>
>>45867915
Of course. Archiving as soon as I finish up the thread.

>>45867934
Yeah. @nanolitre
>>
>Tease her away. Talk to her about sharing an umbrella.
I want to see how this one pans out!
>>
>>45867880
Excellente thread
>>
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>Tease her away. Talk to her about sharing an umbrella.

“But,” you chuckle. “I didn't think you'd be that bold, sharing an umbrella with a boy! Shouldn't you get your boyfriend to do that?”

Shina's face heats up – her ears are bright red as well. “I was a victim of circumstance. If it weren't for my ankle dragging me down, I could have just went without an umbrella.” With every remark, she grows more self-assured. “Yeah. That's it. I had no other choice.”

You give the girl a shit-eating grin. “Uh-huh. And I bet you had no other choice but to lean dangerously close to his chest too, right?”

Shina turns face. “My shoulder was getting wet. I can't afford to catch a cold.”

“Sure.” You pull away from her, adjusting your necktie. “Whatever you say.”

“Here's my house,” Shina stabs her finger in the opposite direction. “Don't follow me.” And with a much gentler voice, she bows to Yori and Hiro. “And the two of you, stay safe, okay?”

Yori merely nods, still stuck in somewhat of a daze. Hiro waves nonchalantly. And so, the three of you walk towards the left street, veering away from Shina.

Well. At least you get to relax. You throw off your soaked coat as soon as you enter Hiro's home. It's not the ideal place to hang wet clothing, but that'll do. The credits should be rolling soon. You've survived episode one.

Only... what? Like 12 more to go? You pray that this isn't some 52 episode season.

“Long day, huh?” Hiro asks, throwing you a hot bottle of tea.

Yori, looks over to you. “Yeah.”

For once, you genuinely breathe a contented sigh and say, “Tell me about it.”

EPISODE ONE – END.
>>
>>45867455
Invite the chick but make I seem we are the one interested in her.
A melodramatic fake confession is in order so we gain a yandere of our own.
>>
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Alright. I'm going to archive the thread. Meanwhile, I'll fill you in on the details for my update schedule. Since I'm on break, I will be updating mostly once a day this entire week, starting every thread around 12 PM EST. This isn't a strict schedule, so I will keep you all updated on Twitter.

I may also answer some questions you may have, if you have any.
Also, this is Nina.
>>
>>45868309
An excellent first thread. Does the episode amount mean how many threads we're going to have?

Also, how much does the "audience" like us?
>>
>>45868364
When did we realise we were an anime character and do we know the world will end or is it just a likely guess?
>>
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=Beware%20of%20Anticlimactic%20Endings%20Quest
Archive up.

>>45868374
I haven't confirmed how many episodes there will be. Satoshi's just guessing. The audience mostly follows Hiro's side of the story, so they don't get to see much. Meaning, you're just another buttmonkey.

>>45868382
[Vague answer here] but yes, Satoshi knows that the world will end.
>>
>>45868512
Are our parents also on "vacation" or is it only Hiro's?
>>
>>45868672
STAY TUNED TO FIND OUT ON THE NEXT EPISODE OF
yeah just Hiro's parents.



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