Who waits for your character back at home?
sheriff with gallows at ready
>>65572050Everyone knows having family waiting for you back home is a death sentence for said family whenever GM remembers they exist.
>>65572050>Not bringing your wife along with youIt is like you want some fat noble to rail her while you are on year long adventures
>>65572050His well-off patrician parents who don't really understand his faith, his studies, or anything that he's doing, but send money every now and then. >>65572070Sounds like you've been playing with shit GMs.
>>65572050His divine court.
>>65572070And then my character goes berserk from grief and kills whatever party members he can before he's also killed in turn.Every GM must remember that being a cunt is a two-way street.
A shitty old farm full of hardened, dried vines, a drinking buddy who may or may not have sold him out, and a life of alcoholism.
>>65572070Hey that's not true, I keep them alive for a few sessions. After all, their deaths would mean nothing if I didn't have you bond with them first.
>>65572050Nobody, Gms are in charge of killing every loved one and family my chars have. That's why I started going the Batman route and killing them myself in the backstory and never ever get attached to anyone
Sickly sister being tended to by the Church that I regularly send money back to.
My pet dog is waiting for me to get back home
His father and his older brother, who realised our father's dream of becoming a cleric. I guess they won't be so happy to find out that I became a necromancer.
Nothing. They don't have a home anymore.
>>65572159>>65572203dere dere fren
>>65572050My tribe of lizardmen eagerly await my heroic return with <ring of winter> to unfreeze our homeland.
>>65572065And she looks like the woman in the OP
>>655720508 brothers, 8 sisters, a loving mother and father, a big cat and his best friend.but im playing a tiefling and they're all dwarfs so its very much pic related
>>65572050My customers. When I'm not adventuring I run an alchemy shop. I produce a large number of potions in advance so I have stock, and I store them at the guild so people can pick them up when they need them, but this time around I've been gone for a month so the guild supply should start running low by this point. It'll be at least another month before I can get back, by then the demand for my goods should have run out and demand will be up.
His adoptive family and their turnip farm. They occasionally send him care packages of turnips. He's not sure how they keep finding their way to him, but he appreciates it. Dude loves him some turnips.
>>65572050Hopefully his four kids. His wife has already passed away and the death curse has been draining away the life of one of his daughters, an adventurer. As the head of the house he took upon himself to find the cause of the curse and save his daughter, leaving the estate to his kids who were dealing a good job of running it.I really hope I can finish Tomb of Annihilation before the DM decides the daughter is dead forever, but at least we are doing a pretty good time in the jungle.
>>65572050Mostly my creditors.
>>65572430> Somebody hates these [summoning] can[dle]s!
Spoils of war that someone else probably already stole from him while he was away, an Okonkwo-tier mud hut with a palm tree that bleeds wine when you tap it, a bunch of relatives who think he's weird and don't really like him much, and a vaguely incestuous cousin.
>>65572050A bottle of wine and a seat at the fire.
>>65572476Hopefully you won't get some competition in the absence.
>>65572158yer a faggot
>>65572050Parents, sibling,, friends, clients/benefactors, slaves and servants.
>>65572050KGB officers ready to kill him or send him back to gulag.He was accused for treason espionage in 40's and was sent to gulag to "soften" him.
>>65572050A regular hobgoblin family, a lass and a lad of adult age, an old wife.I left with the church in exchange for supplies to my Clan.They don't know the crimes I've committed, best be left at that.
>>65572325Ring of Winter doesn't have an unfreeze setting bro
>>65572050His daughter. Come hell or high water, he makes sure to ALWAYS come back home in time to pick her up from school, make her supper, help with her homework and all together just about anything you'd expect a good father to do. Especially since said daughter's mother is dead.
>>65573374But it doesYou can expend 1 charge as an action and use the ring to lower the temperature in a 120-foot-radius sphere centered on a point you can see within 300 feet of you. The temperature in that area drops 20 degrees per minute, to a minimum of -30 degrees Fahrenheit. Frost and ice begin to form on surfaces once the temperature drops below 32 degrees. This effect is permanent unless you use the ring to end it as an action, at which point the temperature in the area returns to normal at a rate of 10 degrees per minute>This effect is permanent unless you use the ring to end it as an action, at which point the temperature in the area returns to normal at a rate of 10 degrees per minute
>>65572050Those tattoos really ruin the image.
>>65572050Cousin Grigori and Cousin Ivan and Cousin Wladimir and Cousin Pavlov and Cousin Boris and Cousin Dimitri and Cousin Igor and Cousin Nicholai and Cousin Alexei and Cousin Anatoly and Cousin Shasha and Cousin Pyter and Cousin Fivel and
>>65573855Nice. Missed one on her left upper arm though.
>>65572050My half-orc grandma! She works as a bouncer at a small village bar and used her meager savings to bankroll my trip to the city so I could follow my dreams of becoming a professional pit fighter, just like my grandpa before me (of course, my grandfather doesn't actually know I exist, Gramma was a groupie for him back in the day and got lucky once, which resulted in my mom being born). In fact, she's the reason I want to pit fight in the first place, thanks to the stories she'd tell me when I was young!
>>65572050His mom. Not in the intimate way.
>>65572050The yandere elf chick that my sorcerer knocked up... who had been planning it and used her apothecary skills to make herself more fertile. He had been planning to hit it and quit it once he was done with the plot, but she saw him as a conquest to be tamed, and my character's adoptive father made him have a shotgun wedding to her.Out-keikaku'd again. Don't feel bad for the sorcerer, though. He's a piece of shit who deserves far worse than a kinky elf doting on him.
A kind and loving family, just as eager as she is to see what her brother's face would look like if he had not merged, body and soul, into her before the two were born. In a way, I suppose that means he's also waiting for her. The family has met him, plenty of people have met him, but she alone is unable to ever interact with him since they can't both be conscious at the same time. And, consequently, he also can't speak to or see her. Aside from in the physical sense when he's fronting and looks in a mirror, of course.
>>65572050My brothers in arms at my monastery
>>65572050why leave them home if they can join as camp followers?
>>65572050Ex-husband and in-laws. It's complicated.
>>65572180Heh, I did this exact one a few years ago. My character was a bit of an asshole (mostly because said church was non-good) tho, as either his untimely death, his allies' deaths or lack of an income could mean the death of his sister.Negotiate hard, winning was more important than morals, seek and ally people with both skill and potential, and spend only money that you positively must.What about yours?
>>65572050A planet ruled by the traitors, and possibly a death at their hands.
Family and fields of flowers.But she's in the Imperial Guard so she's never going back. At least her unit is made up of some family.
>>65572050The old ass tiger they dont send out in the arena anymore.
>>65572050His home, and the promise of a peaceful life.He's total bros with the wandering shieldmaiden in the party and they've already established that they want to become housemate smiths back at my hometown.
>>65576469>housemate smithsIs that what the kids call it these days
>>65572050A warren of kobolds who want him to fix their leaky plumbing.
She doesn't have a home, she's adventuring because that's her best hope to find one someday.And also because the party is kind of her adoptive family
>>65572065fpbpI just don't see adventurers as family people.
>>65572050His childhood friends with whom he rebuilt the orphanage of their childhood.Also a dozen of kids who yearn for him to come back as he is the cool adult with a weird face who also cooks well
>>65576867Have you tried not playing adventurers?
>>65572050The alchemist's daughter from his home. They send letter back and forth fairly regularly.
>>65576690There's no attraction between them, they're like siblings. My character lost his sister shortly before adventuring, and his journey involves coping with her departure by getting some new experiences through adventuring and getting out there, but it's merely temporary. Her character is a shieldmaiden who never really had a family to begin with, and my guy is the first show of genuine care and comfort she's had in a long while, and she reminds him of her sister, so they've grown close in a non-romantic way.They also really like crafting, metalworking and woodworking, so they've decided to live at my character's housr and use their riches to start a workshop.
His father as well as his beloved, the young daughter of a small, neighboring lord.
>>65572050His childhood friend. He has plans to send for her once he gets things settled so they can be together.
Currently married to an unknown species that stepped out of a rift. She is currently held up at a motel with our children (cloned via gene slicing our genetics).
>>65572050At large garrison of slaves that would stone her to death for detreying them and escaping without a thought of liberating them.
>>65572050Mom, stepdad, half-brother, half-sister.
>>65573692Why would you care about the ink more than those man feet? The tranny frame? Pig nose?
The crew of sailors that betrayed him so they could turn his mansion into a pirate cove. Once the campaign is over he is going full Wind in the Willows on the fucker except with a lot more screaming and thunder.
>>65572050A priest who raised him for all his life and taught him what it takes to be a paladin.
>>65579914it's not as ugly as the tranny in your pic, but yes, you get the point.
>>65579914>wanting to bang a tattooed whoreenjoy your herpes, faggot.
his monk brothers
>>65572050A group of old monks, but its fine, I'm travelling with my childhood friend anyway.
His grandmother, but it's a mobile home, so she could just show up whenever.
>>65572050A few bastard children in a few different villages
>>65572159GMs murdering backstory characers is why players are murder hobos
>>65572159>not making one of the background characters a bbeg
>>65572050hic peasant village middle of nowhere.I'm sure his friends miss him though.
>>65572070Depends on the GMs, some get narratively contrary and things get weird.>Party is struggling through the final dungeon>Things are looking bad as we might not have the strength and energy to fight the campaign boss>Suddenly, the GM reveals an army of all the people who our party has helped along the way to aid us!>All our friends and loved ones too>All of them>The rogue's boyfriend has apparently taken off-screen levels in assassin and shanks an orc about to squash the rogue's head>The wizard's daughter is in the experimental enchanted armor he had been working on for me and is now neck-snapping ogres with one hand>My own paladin's dainty wife has become, in the GM's words: "An amazon of a woman, rippling with muscle and clad in heavy armor with a greatsword so sharp she splits one of the dragonlord's son's in two in a single blow">tl;dr. all those rolls the GM had been making throughout the campaign was our families doing some behind the black shonen training arc.this never actually happened. But it's funny to imagine.
>>65572050noone because the boros legion burned down his entire rotfarm and killed his workerbros.
noone. his come is a cave that he inherited from his parents. hes a bachelor oger.
>>65584600Yes it is.
>>65572201Tell me more about it.
>>65572528Must love some Harvest Moon.
>>65574379Do they speak through notes?
>>65572050>>65577521>>65578128Is it an unwritten rule that the girlfriend back at home must be barefoot?
No one, DM killed them all. The bastard.
the wraiths of her dead family
>>65572050I picked the orphan backgroud, my character doesn't have a home to return to, he has a cool mouse pet tho
>>65585357Make it much more desirable to go back to them
>>65572050His cat and neighbours. Father works as a higher up in the Union and mother is a tube. Cat is genetically modified to be able to take care of herself and my domini. Neighbours are unaware and ordinary. Most of my friends work with me within the Construct.
>>65586480Go back to hangover clinic, dad.
>>65572292>palsI sense someone getting killed off-screen next session.
There's fucking nothing left. Not the people, not the house, not even the god damn timeline.Fuck my DM.
The town where he worked as a craftsman his whole life. He might return there once, but it will not feel like home.
>>65572050Nobody at the moment, though she's been renovating a small half-ruined dun atop a crag overlooking her hometown. She wants to make a play at becoming a local lord.
>>65585439>>65586499>>65572203>tfw specifically avoid le lonesome famileless dude/orphan trope but still endup as that because of the GM
>>65572050In Vampire my character has only been turned recently. His mum and dad, divorced since he was young, are still out there, mourning their son unaware of his new (un)life.
>>65572050His daughter. She's sick and he's looking for a cure.
>>65585357What if she is simple peasant in fantasy setting? Shoes back then were rather expensive and not everyone could afford more than one pair for more formal gown.Btw, when she's barefoot, she looks more cute.
>>65572077Just rail the noble. Then she’ll be your woman again after you make him your woman.
>>65572050I’ve got a few characters right now, so let’s see...>her noble parents, siblings, and grandfather (her father is a Count!)>her witch of a mother and her Elder Dragon teacher and patron>his lovely wife >his poor mother and sisters, staying with his aunt while he goes to war to avenge his uncle and their clan>his uncle the town butcher
>>65588457Superior chinaman thinking
>>65588534Imagine being some pompous poncy noble feeling all smug about banging this dude’s wife, and then suddenly he just breaks into your house all jacked up on class levels and rapes you.
>>65572065Best answer. PCs are grave robbers from the margins of society. Excommunicated priests, sell swords, mercenaries, criminals, murderers, banished sorcerers who dabbled with what they shouldn’t have, failed apprentices et al.
>>65588610show this mong a paladin
>>65572050A character I need to use again,>he was a big strong farm hand>gentle soul, kind heart, a bit of a pushover, talks little, thinks long and deep though not fast.>buddies would go out to drink after a long day in the fields and drag him along.>his girl didn't like that>they knew he had a temper and after a few drinks would always find ways to set him off for laughs>his girl didn't like that>One day too many he woke up in a cell, bruises from a fight, headache from the drink, guards laughing at him again.>She left.>A week later he stood outside his empty home and couldn't step inside. >He took off running.>months later in a bar in some distant town some odd folks were looking for some muscle for a quest.>He wasn't one to fight, but they put a sword in his hand and offered him a share. >Farm hand turned barbarian adventurer>always looking to avoid a fight>always trying to talk things out>but people always push him to it anywayNo one is waiting for him at home.But maybe going out and helping folks, maybe that will get her to come back.
>>65572050If you think about it the only people who would become adventurers are not the kinds who want to go home or to have a home to go back to. Either it's gone, it's no good to them, or they're no good to it. And with nowhere to go and no idea how to truly leave it behind and settle elsewhere, they take a fool's profession.
>>65572050His father owned a plantation and groomed him for running it after he passed on. He was a cocky little prick who wanted glory and admiration instead of inheriting a safe and somewhat successful business, so he ran off to find it. Even before he got himself sucked into events that took him away for years he'd realised he'd made a serious mistake and wanted to go home. When he eventually did, he found out his father had died and passed on his lands to his step-brother, who greeted him on return sincerely and warmly, but doesn't want to give up the business he turned from 'getting-by' into 'booming'.In his downtime he's looking to find out what happened to a girl he used to know from back then. Not sure i want to see what our DM will come up with.
>>65585357Shoes are expensive and you wouldn't want to wear your one pair a year out around the farm.
>>65588803I like it. He should rape a barmaid.
>>65588909You don't understand. He can't get over her and his girl wouldn't like that. His party could have a lusty sex addicted deamoness, but he wouldn't notice because she's not his girl. They could encounter sirens and this would happen https://youtu.be/xKS_bcWuYlc
black dragon slaughtered my tribe to use their hideout as its lair. Knight dudes killed it by caving in my home. Not only is no one waiting for me at home, but home ain’t even there.
>>65588623Just because someone is a paladin doesn’t mean they are in the good graces of the church you rube. History is rich with examples of renegades, reformers and heroes that have challenged the ecclesiastic hierarchy.
>>65589719>Just because someone is a paladin doesn’t mean they are in the good graces of the churchit just means it in 99% of the cases
>>65589838Welcome 20 something neuD&D player!
>>65589854>krautexplains the autism
>>65572050His siblings and his tribe. He’ll return one day, but first he must find his older brother, and drag him away from adventuring so he can take up our father’s place as chieftain.
>>65576867The kind of person with a wife, kids and parents to look after is very rarely going to leave them all behind to fight dragons and travel the continent unless absolutely forced to.>Hey John, me and the boys are gonna grab some armour and go looking for the sunken temple of the forgotten death lord, Clyde bought an old map from a travelling salesman that marks its last known location, wanna tag along?>No what the fuck, I have to feed my kids, why would I do that
>>65589838Joan of Arc
>>65589942Except that real people move to new countries alone and even take dangerous jobs far from home to support their families in real life all the time, and the potential wealth difference between adventurer and normie is ludicrous and dramatically higher than those real life examples, so the incentive would be even stronger.
>>65572070>admitting you had a family>admitting you were born>admitting you lived anywhere>not claiming spontaneous autogenesis in an unspecified locationIt's like you WANT the town you grew up (as an unloved, unwanted urchin) on the streets of to be burned to the ground with no survivors.
>>65572325This is the same for my character’s tribe, but with Inuits instead of Lizardfolk.
>>65572050Why would anyone wait for an empty shell of a human being pretending to be alive?
>>65589998Sure, but being an adventurer isn't really comparable to being a solider or working in a mine.With those jobs you get a regular pay, can see your family, and if you die your employer gives your pay/greivance to your family. Whereas being an "adventurer", you have no guarantee that you won't end up dead in a cave somewhere, with nobody to recover your wealth or body. Plus, assuming a standard medieval fantasy world, you are hardly going to find yourself in the kind of poverty that drives people to those kinds of jobs in the modern world, where any serf or peasent can pick up a hoe and work the fields and your only expenses are bread, tithe and tax for the lord.
The wizard that made him, they kinda just hang out.
>>65590097Sure, but the potential gain is fucking absurd, like to the point where an adventurer will surpass that lord in strength and wealth before long, and just replace him
A small but growing harem.
>>65590225Survivor bias, for every level 1 party that goes out and grows into unstoppable demigods, there's a hundred level 0 commoners who get jumped by goblins and skinned for leather.
>>65588832Or people who have a journey they need to complete. Cures for what ails their family is the easy and obvious one, but you could have been kidnapped, or you took up arms to defend your village, etc. Don't limit yourself.Hell, even the "they're no good to it" can be a motivator. Become worthy again and return as a better person. That's worth going on an adventure.
>>65572050a rougher tavern in the seedy part of town, run by her old friend. it's not a mansion, but its comfortable and the thieves' guild looks out for each other
The barkeep of a prestigious inn of a major port city, although it's less "waiting for" and more "dreading the return of", since she'd only come back if she was truly hard up for cash. She's an absolutely terrible barmaid, but he'd begrudgingly hire her back anyway out of a sense of obligation towards her late mother.
>>65572050Multiple women and my children scattered across a variety of towns and villages await my arrival home that I said will occur soon
>>65572584I've only just noticed that "creditor" contains a misspelled version of "redditor" in it.
>>65579201With you on the feet but the nose is adorable. Girl should wear some more shoes to shape them well.>>65579914I imagine that only people who look like porridge face post this image
>>65592375Are you for real? Shoes ruin feet.
>>65592426And clothing ruins bodies.
>>65592928It's universally known that shoes cause deformities in feet. Don't make me post disgusting pictures to illustrate.
>>65572050His Goliath father, farming the steppes partially to help his tribe partially to give his son something to come back to, always with supplies on hand to make him a fresh pair of moccasins.
>>65572050The City Father and that weird crystal robot he's still trying to figure out. And sometimes his nephew, when their journeys bring them back at the same time. Exalted is fun.
>>65592993Bad shoes do, duh. Good shoes, do not. Spare me the NAXALT.
>>65572050A wife, and young child. My character doesn't really want to be adventuring, but the organization he's a member of made him do it because the wizard who leads the party is a bit eccentric and needs someone to keep an eye on him.After this is over he plans to hang up his sword and live a quiet life farming.He's probably doomed.
>>65590097Special Forces Soldiers, Fishermen, Contractors in ridiculously dangerous areas, Oil Rig workers, etc all spend a ton of time away from family doing very dangerous jobs.Plus, "adventurer" is kind of a trope. Not every character in TTRPGs are doing it for fun and to get loot. Some people are ordered to do it, some of them are honor bound, some of them do it to support their families, and for multitudes of other reasons.
>>65593380>people do dangerous shitThis. That’s why everybody chimping out over Benghazi was the fakest shit. The casualties were literally a bunch of former spooks and embassy jockeys who know exactly how shit goes down and choose dangerous as fuck jobs anyway. The niggas knew the score.
A shallow grave.
>>65593995I'm surprised American embassies aren't attacked more. The rate of spies to diplomats there is 9-to-1.
>>65594153Seriously, and there are so many people who want a piece too
>>65584600Was insanely dope until i read the spoiler and now I'm really sad
>>65594206Add this line whenever you read a /tg/ green text story
>>65572050A ghost village filled with porcelain people who turned into porcelain because of a curse that he unwittingly unleashed.
>>65592993Unless you're wearing high heels or foot bindings then no, they don't.
>>65598278All types of female shoes fuck up the feet other than flats.
>>65572050dead world taken over by elder gods
>>65593380I don't even play adventurers because I fundamentally dislike the concept. If I can't come up with a good story, I just make the character a soldier for the local army on orders from the lord.
He has a wife, but got exiled without warning so didn't get to let her know.She's found out and is adventuring herself to find him, but he found a portal to another continent so she's buggered. He's happier then he's ever been to be rid of her so he can focus on his research and gold hoarding
>>65572070This literally just happened to me, never writing a back story again.
>>65598306>letting your wife wear anything but flatsNever gonna make it
>>65572050I still owe the bank, gear was expensive
>>65572050He doesn't even remember where "home" is anymore. The Nice Lady told him he didn't need to worry about silly things like that. He lives with the fairies and the animals now. He can talk to them now. The Nice Lady gave him a little fairy to watch him while he sleeps so he's safe! She is very nice. She even made it so he'll never grow up! She is the nicest lady ever!
>>65572050His underground house/laboratory. Decided living in a cave system instead of a big, obvious tower was a wise move. That and a semi tamed direwolf.
>>65594206>a total cliche with nothing interested added>"insanely dope"Role players, everyone
>>65585357She's trying to use her distinctive foot odour to lure you, or failing that a replacement, into her boudoir. Classic female ploy.
>>65588423Attempting to look cute deliberately can backfire and often look coquettish and fake.>>65598306Nice delusion
>>65572050The love of his life taken by a superior officer after framing him for stealing the imperial army's supplies
>>65599646>letting your wife wear shoesLiteral cuckold
>>65599646Girls would gladly wear nothing but flats if men didn't object.
>>65573875What do you have against Pavlov? Why is he the only cousin to go by surname? Are you a hungry dog, by any chance? Does that ring a bell?
>>65573875Is it really so hard to google real Russian names that Anglos fuck them up so spectacularly each time?
>>65605956Didn't you know? Real russian names give you GOMMUNIZM
>>65572050The patron of poor minstrels. The twice-hung and crucified arm of the misfit pantheon. My bard scorned tradition and was struck mad for the sin. She may yet return to face the seat of this misfit gods power. Try to force some kind of reckoning and gain one of three outcomes. Silence at last and with it, death. Sanity or the realisation that time has eroded whoever she was before and left only the creeping lunacy
Nothing. Made him an orphan that joined a mercenary company of mages at an early age, because I have always hated the idea of players backstory taking the center-stage in a campaign. Nobody should or do care about your tragic backstory, nor does most people want to play a 3 sessions long arch where your character makes peace with his father or some dumb shit like that. You're playing an RPG not writing a novel. The game and the things that happens in it should mold your character. Background should be no more than a maybe one or two paragraphs long, and define a few personality traits and so on. The rest of the development should happen together with the players, over the course of the campaign.
>>65572050An inquisitor who'll pat her on the head and tell her what a good girl she has been
>>65608668and then burn her?
A large multigenerational family of adventurers who are all too happy to see another one come home with a dragon head or something and tell tales around the hearth about adventures.
>>65572070Hey, that's not true. In our group one PC has sister and mother waiting in home, other has a fiánce. Some of those occasionally give quests to PCs (like the time mother said to her son, "It's time you get married. You better find a princess or otherwise important personto marry."), and some on them will at some point be used as plot device, but will only die if PCs fuck things up. (Ok, that's fairly common, but at times they surprise, so it's not automatic death.)I started to leave family mostly out of action, after ten years of gaming all PCs were always orphans, and that was fucking lame. It took another ten years to fix the damage. It's much more nice to have PCs with actual background, so I can use it to harass PCs. "Give them enough rope and they will hang themselves." I don't need to use their families to harass them.
>>65588457This would probably happen in our game.
>>65585357Generally all females should be barefoot at all times.
>>65612415Based and feetpilled
>>65609263c u t eute
>>65612415Can't argue with that...
>>65612415But why though?
>>65612955So we could admire their cute little feet.
>>65572050My character’s 6 year old daughter and 4 year old son, as I’m out there being a basic human fighter trying to save their mom.Like I couldn’t when she passed away two years ago in this garbage real world.
>>65572050I've been considering giving my character a family he keeps hidden from the rest of the party in a campaign that's starting on Thursday. Partly to protect his wife and kids, but mostly because it's none of the party's business. It wouldn't really be for the greater story at all, more of a character trait to emphasize his privacy, but something the other PCs could explore if they try to figure out where he goes every time they return to the hub city. I'd also write-off my character's earnings to them every time he's paid, too.I've been thinking it over more though, and I think I would prefer my character volunteering to maintain an orphanage would be better. It's a little more unique than having a family and fits being a paladin a bit more. Third route, wife died during childbirth, and his sister and brother-in-law help take care of his kids while he does mercenary work, because it pays so well and it's closest to what he's used to doing.I think I prefer the orphanage, though.
>>65572050My character is an old dwarf merchant from a very large family who's handed over control of his business to his son after his wife died, and left to end out his days adventuring. He's got 3 sons and 2 daughters in his home city with about a dozen grandchildren between them , and extended family in just about every single large town and city.I suppose they're not really waiting for him, but he drops by and visits his family with treasure, new stories, and trinkets for the kids in between adventures.
>>65572050his bible and a shit ton of cats
>>65573916Pretend it's a birthmark.
>>65572159I'm going to find you, anon.And I'm going to GM for you, and I'm going to have the BBEG raise your family from the dead as a goodwill gesture to see if he can't persuade you to not go after him but instead go home.
>>65614295He must really hate his cats if he leaves them alone with only a bible.
>>65617570He's not a bard from Georgia, is he?
>>65572050The Emperor.For when I die in battle, my spirit shall return to Holy Terra to feast at His table.
>>65584600oh you. that'd make for an awesome final battle though
>>65572050The skull of his adoptive father, a minotaur. That and a few druids and orc bands, but they don't really care if he comes back or not.
>>65581400>grandmother is baba yaga>occasionally shows up and gives him world-breaking artifacts he has no idea how to use as gifts
>>65572050he's going to meet his family, just not back home...
>>65618979No... A sinner who escaped from Hell.
His wife and kid
>>65572050Nobody really. He left home at a young age, learned a bit of wood and fieldcraft over a few years, spent a hitch as a caravan guard, then got commissioned to chart and pacify a region of unclaimed territory to the south of civilization. After a few months of that, he found himself helping lead the creation of a small kingdom in said pacified land, and is now too busy trying to help run said kingdom by trying to organize all the hunters, woodsmen, and other forest based loners into some semblance of a militia/special recon force. So far, due to my autism and real life personal skills or lack thereof, I've accidentally managed to dodge every romance plot hook the gm has thrown my way in all the sessions we've played, only to have my actions lead to a lonely lady in town accidentally join up with a baby sacrificing cult. Luckily, I broke up said cult before any sacrificing could be done, and the gal immediately surrendered, complied, and repented. She since went missing after I promised to protect her, and now I'm prepared to tear the countryside apart to find her, so does that count?
>>65572050His mom, his dad's friend who's basically been his uncle his whole life, and a few people who have a much more positive view of him now that he's far away and financially successful enough to send money home.
>>65593995I think the whole benghazi thing was less that they died, and more the people in charge of them at the time knew about the attack, could have done literally anything to save the situation, and instead chose to do nothing. Lives spent/lives wasted and all that
>>65604767>*if other women weren't super judgmental and they weren't self conscious about itAnecdotally, just about every guy I've met (including myself), doesn't really care if a gal isn't wearing heels in 90% of situations, but it's always the other women who judge and nitpick and bully
>>65624184My dad loves heels. It's a boomer thing (actual boomer, not the 4chan meme).
>>65572050Their clone, just waiting for them to die
>>65572050Formerly drunk dad who's sobered up since his son left home.Kid sister who's learning magic in anticipation of her first level of wizard.Ex-Girlfriend who wants to cut his dick off.
>>65572050GULAG or final execution.
>>65572050Not too long ago, t'was restless nights forcing smiles through the tears thinking about everyone he's lost.Nowadays, it's his wife, from whom he tries to keep his numerous deaths a secret.And once the campaign's done, it'll be his wife and kid, and he'll finally retire from adventuring and take crash courses on maturity and fatherhood.
>>65572050A strange-and-maybe-even-human mad scientist, a tank pilot that's known to be the last line of defence against the periodically invading aliens, a bunch of ragtags working on an asteroid-scale warp engine, and the people he and his wife rule over.
>>65572050A coral farm and sculptor's studio, as well as his narcoleptic grandfather. - the rest of the family ran off looking for their son/brother/cousin.May or may not be in ruins, as he angered a fairly spiteful pirate as his first action above the water surface,and may or may not also include a sunken pirate ship - depends on whether or not the pirates woke up the grandfather in the process of destroying the coral farm and sculptor's studio.
>>65572050Her brother, for now
>>65626369How can he stop being her brother?
>>65572050A loving family/house that, whilst not understanding her reasons for leaving her life, still do not think poorly of her and would happily welcome her back if and when she returns.Sounds normal enough.She's a drow monk, who left because she developed two personalities and the one normally dominant is the one that frowns on eating sentient people and the general sex/violence drow commit so thoughtlessly (the other is completely fine with it).Family is one of the particularly influential houses, and plays into this a lot. But they still love her.
>>65588803>>65588909>>65589053He should still rape a barmaid.
>>65572050Her mom and dad in a comfortable, middle-class part of town with a low chance of danger
>>65572050Her useless waste of a Mother originally on being inducted into the Null Maidens and now her fellow Sisters in her solitary mission.Recently however fate convened to have her mission bring her to her home world where she reunited with her Mother who had long since gotten clean of drugs and who now worked as a Laywoman of the Church in penitence for all but selling out her daughter to the Imperial tithe.There reunion was bittersweet and short but she managed to teach her mother how to say an intimate farewell in Thoughmark.She learned later the world had a growing Genestealer Cult on it and most the continent would be put to the torch. She just hopes that her mother's cancer claimed her before this.Meanwhile she won't see her sorority again until the barely ordained Witch she is appointed to oversee has broken the wards on the warp-borne Tesseract found on that lonely Argiworld and is returned safely to her cell on Holy Terra or is dead and incinerated.
>>65572050Sickly sister being tended to by the Church that I regularly send money back to.
>>65572050His wife and children who are currently living and comfortable life at a lords estate and his children will be the first in his family tree to be formally educated due to his exemplary service to the lord.
>>65630275My character is definitely not Davos Seaworth.
>>65632042A character in Game of Thrones who started life as a common smuggler, and through exemplary service was elevated to knighthood which allows his children to be educated as lords and ladies might be educated (which was his primary concern, more than having lands or patronage.)
>>65632118Did he have his kids sadistically murdered in from of him?
>>65632313No but a couple of his sons blow up.
>>65633058Not a real GoT character then.
>>65621925...HOW DID YOU KNOW?!
>>65634708Not many mobile homes around.
>>65572050Well, I had a would-be waifu in our starting city I joked about for some character development and back story. Then I took Leadership and got a sizeable cohort now I have this tsundere stalker and a gaggle of children at my command. The Stalker is a lv. 5 alchemist and the kids range from fighter to rogue to ranger but no spell caster as the party already has 2.
>>65572050>My 3.5 Ed. Necromancer: His very disappointed parents. His mage mother still hopes he'll take up a more respectable specialization. His father, the captain of the town guard, has no idea his son is a necromancer, he just thinks he's an alcoholic nerd.>My 5th Ed. Paladin: His loving wife and three young daughters. Also a very big fluffy dog. Full wholesome.
>>65572050His many, identical twin brothers of varying levels of skill Terry, Jerry, Larry, Harry and so forth.Old school dungeon crawls aren't very forgiving.
>>65635448It's a secret to my party, but I've only ever told them she was a hag and my babushka, and they never tried to put 2 and 2 together. It's funny to me that someone guessed it right away.
>>65572050A big tittied Orc wife and a fat-assed Elf wife
>>65623980So did they die anon?
>>65572050This picture is the visual equivalent of Thunder Road.That's all I have to say.
Only shame. He was hit in the back of the head, and now cannot remember most of his past, but his last memory was that he was retreating from the battle out of cowardice.
>>65639905No, his marriage was a session of the game and the birth of his son. All of them managed to live to the end of campaign.
>>65581216Best answer>walks in>Drops end game legendary weapon into umbrella holder>grabs beer from fridge>Kicks back in trusty recliner
His older brother, sister in law, nephews/nieces, grandnephews/nieces, childhood friends, geriatric parents, buried body of his eldest brother, the community in general and just about fucking everything he's comfortable with. Also, the trumped up charges and threat of becoming some necro's skeleton.He's definitely wondering if his family will be targeted as revenge, if his parents will die from shock, where will people get treated, how will the slums overall react to his disappearance, etc.
>>65572050Waiting for him at home is his wife and daughter, along with other close relatives
>>65573692This is the calling card of a weak man.
His disappointed father, reluctantly supportive mother, and 11 siblings, including a kid sister eager to follow in his footsteps. His father saved a huge amount of money (for a poor farmer) to send him to a distant city to become a scholar, and my character instead used it selfishly to fund travels and become a "freelance archaeologist" (tomb robber, effectively). A few years older and wiser, he feels terrible about it, but has failed to make any big scores, and can't face his family unless he can bring back enough money for them all to live like kings.
>>65638833Did you mention the moving house?
Mother and father who think I'm still in school to become a surgeon.Old druid that got me my first class levels.My slightly less-insane-than-me friend, coroner, and laboratory assistant.CN Doctor Druid Mage Scientist was a fun guy to play.
>>65643987>CN Doctor Druid Mage ScientistLiterally Simic.
>>65572050Her cute little husband. My character is a big female Ogre who snu snu'd the fuck out of some elf.>>65572065Based, outlaw on the run is a great backstory.
>>65643947I want footfags too stop pretending that their fetish is good.
>>65644118>SimicDammit, and here I thought I was being at least a smidgen fresh and interesting.
>>65644281Nigger it's literally the lowest part of the body.
>>65572050Well, the 'home' is a living skyship which served as the pirate fortress and crashed somewhere nearby and everyone on board are now being hunted by the Angulan Knights and local authorities both. So I hope they're not there, but scattered through the nearby cities.
>>65588595Well, I am playing a drug-addicted alchemist barbarian...
>>65590278>Saving girls on your adventures and moving on>Girls indepentedly track your home down>They each meet one another and agree to join the waiting harem>Character is none the wiser until he gets back to find his bed full of waifu
>>65572050The ghosts of his entire tribe, including his son who died trying to protect them. He's got nothing at stake, he only goes on adventures because his religion forbids suicide and surrender.
>>65644360and ass is where shit comes from
>>65572050His tribe of demon worshipping murderrapists
>>65572050His mother and father, he took off after they essentially told him he shouldn't be an adventurer. They're destitute and frequently bullied and robbed by people in their city, but say nothing of it because they're weak, and told their son to lay down and accept the same fate. He refused, despite his scrawny status and fearful upbringing, and became a Paladin, swearing to protect anyone too weak to stand up for themselves - present party included.
>>65644935The two flabs of meat are not where shit comes from. Anal is disgusting though.
>>65643747No. My character is very vague about it. Her fear is that my character will tell the wrong person, so baba makes me keep it secret. The party doesn't inquire though. That sort of shit doesn't seem to interest them.
>>65646301So you told it here but didn't tell it to your friends, and you're wondering for some reason why they couldn't guess it and we could.
>>65646320No, not really surprised. Amused though.
>>65573692>>65579201This stuff is bait right?There can't actually be people that view the world like an entitled 8-year-old.
>>65572050>Who waits for your character back at home?ninjas, lying in wait. every single time.
>>65646384I also can't believe that some dumbass dissed her feet.
>>65592358Please anon, your obsession is getting embarrassing
>>65612415Generally all females should be nude at all times.
>>65624014This post actually uses the term "autism" correctly and casually, which I've never seen before on 4chan. Kudos.
>>65643947Based>>65644191Who shoved a foot in your face?
>>65646499Found the reddittor
His young wife and two half-fiend children.
>>65652998Mine is E̶̯̫̼͕̩͓̱̯̪̳ͨ̒ͬ͊̊ͦ͊̈́ͮ̔̈́ͤͣͅd̴͙͈͇͔̱̫̭̯̹̮̠͔͎̐͒̆ͧͦ́͞
>>65646384Who would buy a house covered in Graffiti? Tattoos look fucking horrible on a woman.
>>65653226On a man as well. Appropriate that in our age of kowtowing before savages, people aspire to look like savages as well.
>>65647683Unless you're describing a barely functional human who barely talks or reacts to people, you're not using it correctly.
>>65572050The mother superior, and im not going back.
>>65572050Nobody, because my characters are self inserts and no one likes me.
A church that would rather not have him.
>>65572050Twenty wives of various races, cultures, species, and parallel worlds.
>>65600740... The fact that you posted that with the kokiri symbol intrigues me. Are you in a Zelda campaign or something?
>>65572050THE ONLY THING THAT WAITS IN THE PAST IS DEATH AND DISHONOURTODAY, WE FORGE A NEW DESTINY! A REDEMPTION FUELLED BY BLOOD!if he goes back he's gonna be forced to kill himself, and fuck that
>>65624139I'm surprised nobody assassinated the higher ups responsible in revenge. There has to be a bunch of military guys who classed those men as brothers and are pissed they've escaped any sort of consequence. There has to be at least 1 gung-ho dude who doesn't give a shit about jail and just wants to put a bullet in a politician's head.
>>65663115Stop basing your judgements of Americans on American movies.
>>65604767I dislike heels, as many guys do.Actually, only women care about that shit.
>>65665161That's a very broad generalisation. Lots if not most men like girls in heels.
>>65665180That's a very broad generalisation. Lots if not most men dislike girls in heels.
>>65665229Girls wouldn't wear heels if that were true.
>>65572050No one. He's a half-orc paladin in a party that despises him when all he's tried to do is risk his life to gain their approval. He's now mortally injured and potentially permanently crippled in some capacities.
>>65601145Are we talking about delicate scent made by wearing light, airy shoes or intensive, suffocating smell made by wearing heavy boots all day during hot day?Call me normie, but I prefer first option.
>>65666120Bare feet that have been bare for the entire day smell the best.
>>65601145>Girls seducing their future male partners, using their foot smell like pheromonesSounds like good idea fot the setting
>>65624344Tired old men
>>65572840>tfw you get the wrong person
>>65646060>anal is disgusting Get out
>>65663115The guys were spooks. Spooks don’t give a fuck about each other; they aren’t even human. Just cold, killing machines used in secret wars.
Epic thread, needs to be archived