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“「Umi da!」” you say out over the sound of crashing waves.

“Fufufu,” Akiko grandly jests, “How do you like it — my 「Private Beach」?”

“You really are rich…” Kirino says, half mixed with envy and happiness.

“Don’t get too excited… remember the mission,” Shiro says, stepping out of the 「Humvee」.

“You say that but you’re excited, aren’t you?” Kirino prods, “Heheh, I know you spent forever picking out your swimsuit.”

Popping a lollipop into her mouth, the silver haired girl turns her head away and replies, “I wanted to be prepared… that’s all…”

Cutting through the low hanging greenery with one arm and waving to the others with your other, you say, “Come on, let’s go!”

This was a scouting mission — the objective being to check out possible 「Oni」 sightings from Akiko’s family — but there’s no way you’re going to let this opportunity go to waste! N-not that this was an excuse to go to the beach or anything.

As Kirino rushes past you, she says, “Hey, someone help me set up the volleyball net!”

“At least pretend we’re working!” Akiko shouts out in exaggerated frustration.

What should you do?
>Help Kirino set up.
>Help set up the “scouting equipment.”
>You can’t forget the sunscreen!
>Do a quick check of the perimeter first.
Twitter: https://twitter.com/ConfettoQM
Archive: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/qstarchive.html?tags=Oni-chan%20Slayer%20Quest

You can’t forget the sunscreen
Gota do each others backs
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You can’t forget the sunscreen.

As you pull a bottle from a basket, Akiko sets down towels, umbrellas, and some chairs — things absolutely vital to the success of 「Prolonged Oni Watching」. You lightly apply the sunscreen, making sure to cover everything so you don’t regret everything the day after. Arms, check. Legs, check. Face, check. Back…

“Need help?” Akiko asks you.

“Thanks, Akiko!” you say, handing her sunscreen.

“Help me with mine next?”

With a nod, you lie down and let her hands run over your back, noticing how soft they were. Ahh, you’re jealous, cooking hasn’t done any miracles for you. Swinging a steel chair around didn’t help either.

“Your turn,” you say, getting up.

She undoes her top and lies down, her breasts making you lightly writhe with envy as they succumb to gravity. Gently, you go over her back, feeling the rises and falls on her back.

“Ahn~” a voice comes out.

“W-wha, are you okay?”

“Mmhm,” she says, “you should be a masseur.”

“I-is that so…?”

A moment later and she’s back up, and just as you stand up—

“Watch out!” Kirino calls.

You turn and a volleyball lightly bounces off your head.

“Eep!” you squeak.

“Ahh, sorry, sorry. You wanna play with us?” Kirino waves with Shiro standing across the net.

>Do a quick perimeter check.
>Do a quick perimeter check… in the water.
>Sit down. You have Onis to watch out for!
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“Get over here, Kotorin!” Kirino calls.

“Ehh? This doesn’t seem fair…”

“…Don’t underestimate me…” Shiro says, taking a step back.

“Aaalright, here I go!” Kirino says, tossing the ball into the air.

The blonde girl lightly serves it, gently sending it over and past the net. On cue, Shiro returns it likewise onto your direction.

“I got it!” you say, walking over.

Suddenly, you feel your feet almost trip on a rock in the same and you jump. The volleyball comes at you and in the last second, you bump the ball… towards the opposite direction of Shiro.


Like a flash of lightning, Shiro dashes to receive it, reaching it in time with ample time. The volleyball goes over to you again, and this time Kirino shouts to you.

“Set me up!”

With a nod, you gently nudge it her way into the air. Kicking the sand beneath her, Kirino leaps into the air, and in the crest of the arc, her hand slams on the ball. However, Shiro had already anticipated this, meeting the blonde girl mid-air.

“「Hayai」!” you say.

Returning Kirino’s attack with double the force, the volleyball changes directions at ridiculous speeds and sends it into the sand behind you and Kirino. It’s visibly shredded as it grinds against burning rock and shell, ultimately flying into the air and into the ocean.

“T-that was a bit too much,” Kirino says.

“Sorry…” Shiro replies.

“It’s fine, I’ll get it.”

With that she jumps into the water and tries to swim for the volleyball. A few minutes pass, and she’s still struggling to get catch it, the waves seemingly against her at every attempt.

You should do something…
>Get into the water and help her.
>Get a new ball while she’s at it.
>That’s enough volleyball for one day…
>That's enough volleyball for one day.
>>Get into the water and help her.
>Get into the water and help her.
>Get into the water and help her.
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“I think that’s enough volleyball for me for one day…” you say.

Walking into the ocean, you go in to help her out. You watch as just as Kirino grabs the volleyball, the waves suddenly appear to knock it away. It’s strange, as if it was playing with her...

Watching from afar, you make out a pattern in the water. The tide comes again and… Yes! You grab onto the volleyball, making sure to not let it go again.

“Nice one, Kotorin!”

Abruptly, you hear the sound of rushing water explode. The ocean and tides bulb out, forming a blanket that grows thinner as it rises. The sudden wave knocks you backwards and out of the water onto shore.



Lifted into the air by a slick, slimy appendage, Kirino tries to kick and push herself free… until she gets turned upside down, where she starts holding on for dear life.

“Help me!” she cries out.

Shiro notes, “…「This must be the work of an enemy 「Oni」」.”

Roll 1d100, best of three.
Quick, do something!
>Dive into the water and try to reach for Kirino.
>Run back and call for backup.
>Find a weapon that you can use.
Rolled 94 (1d100)

>>Dive into the water and try to reach for Kirino.
Rolled 32 (1d100)

>Find a weapon that you can use.
There are beach chairs!
Rolled 24 (1d100)

>Find a weapon that you can use.
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You pull back, running to find a weapon and passing by Akiko. What… what could you use…?

A lightbulb goes off as you grab a beach chair, folding its legs and swinging it forward. It’s a bit fragile, but it’ll have to do!

Again, the water rises, but this time it’s faster than before! Lashing out, it swings toward Akiko with dangerous intent. She sidesteps the first attempt. The 「tentacle」 loops around without warning, wrapping around and encircling her.

“Shoot!” she says as she tries to jump out of the way.

But it was too late; the beast grabs her legs midair and pulls her into the air. Without pause, another 「tentacle」 comes out, swinging for Shiro. She dodges the first one, but as the second attack was about to connect—

“Take this!” you cry out, smashing the chair head on.

The appendage recoils and backs off, but you don’t let it go that easily! Jumping into the water, you latch on to a tentacle as the beast thrashes, throwing you wildly around. Out of the corner of your eye, you notice Shiro behind you.

“「Sankyuu」,” she says, giving you a thumbs up and signaling you.

You nod your head as you stand atop of the slimy tentacle.

Roll 1d100, best of three.
This feels so gross…
>Simultaneously attack!
>Have Shiro distract the monster while you look for a weak point.
>You’ll distract the monster instead.
>Aim to free Akiko and Kirino first!
Rolled 23 (1d100)

>Simultaneously attack!
Rolled 59 (1d100)

>Have Shiro distract the monster while you...
>Aim to free Akiko and Kirino first!
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You look behind you to find Shiro running alongside on a different tentacle. Your eyes meet hers, and both of you are in sync.

A 「tentacle」 sweeps your way. With a leap, you hop on top of it, barely stopping yourself from slipping off. Running across the slimy surface, you take one last look at Shiro as you leap onto the tentacle holding Kirino. As you swing the 「beach chair」 with all you have, the silver haired girl takes the 「lethal lollipop」 and throws it with absolute precision at the monster’s eye.

It cries out and flails, allowing your strike to connect fully, smashing the tentacles away. The chair falls apart, and so does the beast’s grip!

“Gahh!” Kirino yelps out among the shower of splintering wood.

“I’ll catch you!” you say as Kirino falls onto your arms.

She gives you a quick thanks and gets onto her feet, but quickly another 「tentacle」 comes smashing down, separating you two.

Leaping into the air, with a broken chair leg in one hand, you take aim — and throw! It misses the monster’s eye, unfortunately, but it distracts it enough that when you check back on Shiro again, you find Akiko standing next to her.

Out of nowhere— another slimy appendage comes at you!
>Dodge it and land into the water.
>Try to grab onto it as it attacks you.
>Let it hit you and use its momentum to bring you closer!
Going to extend the voting for about 20 minutes before I wrap things up.
>Dodge it and land into the water.
>Dodge it and do that thing where you jump on top of it and start running along its length before landing a massive hit in the monster's face/eye/thing.
>Grab it!
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As you’re falling, Shiro whips out a handful more lollipops out of thin air. Lollipops that you don’t, or even want to, know where she’s been keeping them. With a quick toss, they fly out as every dodges the attacking tentacles.

Positioning yourself correctly, you swing out of the direct strike to grapple on, the suction cups below aiding you. You swing upwards again and land on top of it, steadying yourself as one of your flip-flops plop into the water. The squishy texture of surface of the skin violates your senses.

This… this feels way too gross!

Akiko lands on a tentacle next to yours, “Let’s go, at the same time!”

“Okay!” you say.

On that signal, you two being picking up speed, running along the length of the 「disgusting tentacle」. Even as it shakes and rumbles, you hold on and keep up your pace. Everyone, Kirino and Shiro too, are doing the same, until finally, just before arms reach, you wind back a punch, giving it all you got, and—


You throw the weight of your entire body as you leap into the air, crashing into the monster’s good eye alongside the other three.


Carrying through, you feel the creature’s body give way and blast forward from the feat of pure strength. For a moment, you hold an expression mixed with relief and anger, up to until you hit the water.

Surfacing, you gasp, “Ahh! We did it!”

Three more heads pop up beside you.

“What the hell was that?” Kirino wonders.

“Is it still moving” you ask.

“…I don’t think so…” Shiro replies.

“We should call the others. Ah damn it, our vacation is over already!” Akiko says.

“Hehe, what happened to it being a mission?” Kirino prods.

“Oh quiet,” she complains, “I need to take a shower, ugh. I feel… vulgar.”

Putting her hands together, Kirino starts squirting water with her palms, “But you’re in the ocean. Y’know, nature’s bath.”

“Hey come on, let’s get out of here,” you lightly suggest, making your way out of the water.

It would be revealed that you four had stumbled upon some kind of urban legend. You found that out, however, only after a few days past discovering that 「the sushi was delicious.」
ED5: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sddV8cxw5Rs

Thank you for playing! That ended up being shorter than I thought it'd be, sorry about that. I've also run out of things to write for this quest completely, so I doubt I'll ever run this again, but thanks again!
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No wedding with oni-chan ever then
Marrying your siblings is not sanctioned by law in most countries.
Theres like some sort of Apocalypse happenings though since all the oni-chans are onis now so i could see some changes and leeway being made.

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