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/qst/ - Quests


>You are Anon
>14 year old boy
>Who lost his best friend to a magical princess
>Got a new best friend from an evil hole
> THE BOOK
>A voice inside offered you a gift
>Access to all the magic in an entirely dead world
>All for you
>She didn't ask for anything
>Only that you be strong
>That you strike back against the world that treated you like trash
>Now you've got friends
>Not one but TWO girls who think you might possibly be the spide-rman mixed with the incredible hulk
>You also have a knife wound
>In your stomach
>Half filled with sea-water
>Thanks, life
>Fucking Sea-trolls
>You've just gotten the greatest win of your career
>Defeating a 30 foot Troll using only your monstrous arm-bro
>Muscles
>Your ability to spontaneously combust
>...and tiny little dead things
>You barely escaped with your life
>Still, you're laying face down in the white California sand
>Bleeding
>Wow
>Still bleeding
>The world is fading fast
>Jackie pulls you up
>"How cool was that?"
>You rasp
>WAP!
>Jackie has hit you in the chest
>Tears are streaming down her face
>"You jerk! I told you not to do that!"
>"Jacki-"
>"There's no such thing as heroes! Everyone that tries to be one dies!"
>"Ja-"
>"I don't wanna trade strangers for you! We could have run! We could have just kept on our own adventur-"
>"JACKIE! I'M MAGIC! SHUT UP!"
>You're dropped back on the sand
>Gonna pretend that was an accident, you guess
>"What are you talking about?"
>"Go get my book. It's in my bag. Back in the car..."
>Oskarr runs off
>Janna kneels down
>"You got a way out of this, meat?"
>She asks cautiously
>Janna looks just as worried
>Figures she wouldn't cry though
>Probably wakes up ready to see bodies drop
>Tough ass
>Stealin kisses ass
>Lookin' ass
>All this talk of ass has muscles restless
>He weakly slaps for the two booties nearest you
>He doesn't have enough energy even for a playful spank
>Oskarr gets back with your bag, dumping it and the book all over your body
>"PFF!"
>You sputter through a mouthfull of school supplies
>"Sorry..."
>You fumble through the pages
>Eventually finding the one that taught you how to heal
>"Blood for blood..."
>You show them the page
>"I need one of you to say this rhyme. Then..."
>Your stomach heaves
>You wince in agony
>"Cut your palm. It'll heal me."
>"Dude..."
>Janna pulls out a damn box cutter without a blink
>Jackie looks like she's in shock
>"Who's-...who's gonna do it?"
>"I'll do it."
>Janna's hard as nails right now
>"Anon saved us and I just stared like a goof. Or a moderate."
>She slices her palm
>A little too deep
>"Ah!"
>Jackie gags at the sight
>"So...what's the spell?"
>...
>"SHIT!"
>>
>>1418051
DARK APPRENTICE JANNA
>>
>>1418051
>inb4 we mutate
>>
>>1418051
It's in the book you dummy! Blood For Blood Read!

If Anon needs to tell her:
>Repeat after me!
> Every single thing we love
> Every light that shines
> Is snatched by wind and chance and fate
> Or cruelly, is a lie
> What is and not we shall define
> Their blood for yours
> My blood. For thyne.
>>
>>1418051
>>"So...what's the spell?"
>>...
This is what happens when you forget to ask what to do before you go all heroic.
>>
>>1418051
> "Every single thing we love
> Every light that shines
> Is snatched by wind and chance and fate
> Or cruelly, is a lie
> What is and not we shall define
> Their blood for yours
> My blood. For thyne."
>>
> "Every single thing we love
> Every light that shines
> Is snatched by wind and chance and fate
> Or cruelly, is a lie
> What is and not we shall define
> Their blood for yours
> My blood. For thyne."
pls don't die
>>
>>1418051
Based apprentice Janna
>>
>>1418088
>TFW we die from our wounds
>>
>>1418051
Question: Are we unable to say it ourselves and sacrifice the tiny undead?

Because if Janna says it, she'll be really drained.
>>
>>1418137
We'd have to roll to see if we get mutations from the undead.
>>
>>1418139
We get no mutations from human blood
>>
>>1418142
Which is why Janna is being our Blood.
>>
>>1418139
>>1418142
Ah, gotcha. Best reserved for deep shit emergencies then.

Makes sense now on why Man-Arm became a bit more man.
>>
>>1418153
>makes sense why man-arm became a bit more man

Really most of us in Discord caught it when we got a FUCKING MONSTER ARM
>>
>>1418084
OK,so janna has to repeat the spell after us and when we say "End it" she will say "For thyne" just to be sure we dont heal her instead of she healing us.
>>
>>1418166
... What on her is there to heal?
>>
>>1418178
The cut she just gave herself.
>>
>>1418178
>implying Janna wouldn't just accept the excess anyways and grow cancer cells or something
>>
>>1418178

>>1418051
>>She slices her palm
>>
>>1418185
>Jannapool the gypsy with a mouth
>>
Is something wrong
>>
Rolled 2 (1d20)

Rolling to see if Allahu Akbar strategy is possible with the fire spell
>>
>>1418309
It sure fucking is.
>>
>>1418309
fucking nope
>>
Rolled 19 (1d20)

>>1418309
I'm a durka durk, let me roll
>>
>>1418309
Literally how we blew the giant's head when we failed the second COMBUST roll and it was charging headfirst at us:
Confirmed by Quest.
>>
ALOHA SNACKBAR
>>
>>1418309
Don't know if this means I failed or succeeded
>>
>>1418406
>WIS is +2
>need to roll under a 5 for catastrophic explosion
>rolled a 4 total
It means you won.
>>
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>>1418078
>>1418084
>>1418088

>Once your head clears it's not so hard
>You just have to remember the first time you heard it
>Your head recites it in Luna's voice
>Your eyes close as you reach up for Janna's hand

> "Every single thing we love
> Every light that shines
> Is snatched by wind and chance and fate
> Or cruelly, is a lie
> What is and not we shall define
> Their blood for yours
> My blood...


>You stop and look up at Janna
>Her eyes are closed too
>"You have to finish it."
>You tell her
>She doesn't know how
>You can feel it
>You grip bloody palms together
>Trying to will the power to her
>Something connects

>"For thyne."

https://youtu.be/amcdiiCOoFM

>Blood
>Human blood rushes into you
>Your body is feels as if it's being filled with burning coals
>Muscles snaps against the sand
>At one point he whiplashes so hard the impact zone is left as steaming glass
>Janna drops to her knees
>She's weak
>...but she did it
>You're healed
>With human blood, nothing feels out of place
>Nothing warped
>Finally, something that makes sense
>You get up, pulling her off the ground
>"You ok?"
>You ask instinctively
>"I need a...sugar cookie."

>You are Anon
>14 year old Necro-Punch-Wizard
>You've just eaten your friend's blood
>Killed a pair of sea dwelling troll cannibals
>You might get laid
>M-maybe y'know?
>You also know just how big the world has gotten


EPILOGUE COMPLETE


>Next session will be Weds at 3pm US Central Time

Party on, my dudes
>>
>>1418462
Good session!
>>
>>1418462
>Waiting until Wednesday
M-muh life will be empty. WE NEED TO GO FASTER.

Also giving someone blood is probably more intimate than sex in a case like this.
>>
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>>1418462
>>1418462
Oh! Silly me. Almost forgot.


>You've grown in strength

>Will is now a +6
You can now raise small class creatures, raising medium sized ones when close to death

>Con is now +5
You are becoming astoundingly tough


>Muscles has grown in power
Strength is now a +8

Elemental weakness discovered
>Ice
Will freeze and disable flesh constructs not made to resist it


Also.

>Mind read can now function two ways
>As long as the recipient is able and willing

Have a good night, children

I can't wait to see you again
>>
Rolled 11 (1d20)

>>
Rolled 1 (1d20)

Rolling for Anon's chance at getting laid
>>
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>>1418555
Oh....
>>
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>>1418555
Sounds about right.
>>
Rolled 4 (1d10)

Rolling for Anon dick length
>>
Rolled 7 (1d20)

>>1418555
Alright, rolling to see if Anon has a big dick to make up for it
>>
>>1418596
Nope, 4 inch spaghetti lord confirned.
>>
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>>1418596
>>1418592
Oh my god
>>
Rolled 19 (1d20)

rolling to see the chance of anon fucking star to prove the altstars wrong
>>
>>1418606
>dice fucking with us
>>
Rolled 11 (1d20)

>>1418606
rolling to see chances of jackie
>>
>>1418462
Welp, looks like we'll need to take care of Janna and make sure she recovers
>>
Porn when
>>
>>1418606
>>1418610
>>
Rolled 3 (1d20)

>>1418555
The trips giveth and the trips taketh away
>>
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>>1418606
STARFU CONFIRMED
>>
Rolled 11 (1d20)

>>1418592
Rolling for Anon's skill in bed.
>>
Rolled 15 (1d20)

>>1418606
Meh, might as well throw my hat in the ring.

Chances of Anon blowing Hekapoo's other fire out
>>
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Rolled 12 (1d20)

>Chance of anon murdering the world
>>
>>1418730
Fuck those mutants
>>
>>1418745
"Homo Novus" is ELIMINATED
>>
Missed the session and fuck my life but dayum that's some good stuff there Quest. Thanks for running!

Also those rollsa re silly, Anon is 14, not even close to done growing. Of course he's going to be lacking in the pants department for now, he'll just have to grow into the big boy breeches or make his own fancy flesh monster dick.
>>
>>1418486
Gud shit, gud shit my man. Though I am getting some persona vibes with this elemental weakness stuff. On another note have you heard of the Necromancers from Diablo? They got some rather neat little spells and doodads if you're ever in the store for some top notch stuff. They even have bone spells for those pesky ice problems.
>>
We still gotta save Luna though.....Just sayin.
>>
>>1418859
That was never not in our minds, it's just something that will take some more time, gotta beat Hekapoo's Trial after all, and then get a wicked saxophone wand.
At least to start, I bet that's like steps one through five of a hundred step piece of Ikea furniture.
Except the furniture is your magical, otherworldly, horrifying yet loving Mom.
>>
>>1418901
Gotta come up with some way to bring her back though. We don't have the tools OR a plan, so something's gotta be thought up in the mean time.

Blood for Blood is out of question; it will either not work or give the book living "human" features.

Hekapoo might know more on fixing Luna, but that's a bit of a stretch. Glossaryck is another person we can go to, but that'll involve dealing with Star and Marco from then on out.
>>
>>1418901
I know the Sax Wand is cool as shit, but we have less of an idea as to how to get it than we do fixing Mummy. With the sax, she just mentioned it in passing of getting our scissors. With saving her, we have a ritual for it and everything, we just can't read it yet. So unless we wanna get a fuckin' store bought one from Quest Buy, I imagine us saving her first.

>>1418927
Like I said with the other guy, we actually already have a lead on saving Mummy. Another ritual in THE BOOK is said to be able to save her. The only problem is we can't read it.
>>
>>1419626
How do you suppose we start learning the language? Any leads?
>>
>>1419897
I was thinking we actually get someone else to read it. And while I know Glossaryck is the go-to answer, I think we should look to H-Poo first.

Sure, SHE might not be able to read it. But she's a dimensional goddess, she's bound to know someone who can read it. Some kind of dark magical scholar or something. Though, if she doesn't turn up any leads, Glossy will be our last hope.
>>
>>1419921
Either way, getting the scissors should be a priority if we want to get Luna back. Even if we go to Glossaryck, we might require some anyway to bring her back, or rather, her ways of communicating to us back.
>>
>>1420706
It probably requires us going back through THE HOLE to actually have a chance at getting her back.
>>
>>1420714
Then we need stuff to protect ourselves; i.e., a wand. Scissors optional, but still very helpful.
>>
SUDDEN EXPERIMENTAL SESSION IN 10 MINUTES

PREPARE YOURSELVES
>>
>>1421485
PREPARATIONS COMPLETE
>>
>>1421487
PS. Session is on the Discord, and is non-canon.
>>
>>1418486
Fuark me we're getting swole.

Right, we need to summon Hekapoo.
Get the trial, get a wand, up our power.

Also, if we keep practicing Blood for Blood, we might be able to transfer life from one willing target to a second target, other than ourselves.

That means animating the Dead World beyond THE HOLE, and having them transfer their life force into THE BOOK. Probably also requires more knowledge of Animate Dead too.

There's also the possibility of Glossaryk helping us, but it doesn't seem strictly necessary - and if it's not strictly necessary to get Star and Marco's help, Anon isn't going to do so.
>>
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>>1421583
mfw we kill half a world to bring mother back, earning the horror of many of our compatriots who didn't realize that was our end goal
>>
>>1421583
Realization: who says Glossaryck will help us?

He might deny us and not bother helping if Luna's considered a threat. Might be best to check with Hekapoo first and only go to him if he's our last lead on reading the book.
>>
>>1421775
Everyone's reasoning seems to be that he's neutral, so he'll help us. But I think that's stupid. And yes, checking with H-Poo first and only going to Glossy last seems like a good idea.
>>
Rolled 3 + 2 (1d20 + 2)

Found out about this a few days ago and just caught up. This is great stuff. Practice rolling to see if I can do it right
>>
>>1422074
>Rolling a 3 on your first roll
You'll fit right in
>>
Rolled 13 (1d20)

>>1422103
You are like a baby. watch this.
>>
H-poo seems to have a legitimate concern for the general well being of the universe, as seen by her getting mad with Moon when she didn't tell them the book was stolen by Ludo/Toffee.

BUT, Glossaryck seems to be a true neutral sort of guy whose only agenda seems to be teaching knowledge.
What my autistic rant is in a nutshell, is that we might actually be fucking up going from Thiccapoo and then to Glossy if it doesn't pan out. When what we SHOULD be doing is going from Glossy to H-poo if for some reason he doesn't want to teach us. Which would be fairly out of character for him
>>
>>1422488
If that were the case, wouldn't Luna not tell us of Hekapoo and "earning" Anon's wand? And that "source of power" we have to show her?

I doubt Luna would have us go to Hekapoo if Hekapoo didn't like her. She'd know off the bat something's fishy even if we don't mention Luna.
>>
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>>1422488
This. Glossaryk seems fully loyal only to the person currently holding his book. He doesn't appear to have any side , and would be content with helping us if we asked Star to let us learn from him.

>>1422548
I also agree with this. The reason the MHC went after Ludo was because he stole the Mewni Royal family's book, not because he was becoming stronger through it while minding his own business.
I don't think Hekapoo will care much about us if we just tell her we were looking for a pai of scissors and we do noting to affect negatively the MHC or the kingdoms allied to them.
>>
>>1422488
OK, while that can be a fair point, consider the following: Glossaryck has a form of history with Mummy. Glossaryck knew Mummy before he "became so peaceful."

H-Poo has, as far as we know, no connection to Mummy. She doesn't know her name, her roll, where she came from, ETC ETC. She knows, as far as we know, nothing about Mummy while Glossaryck's written in Mummy's book "before he became so peaceful."

Doesn't H-Poo, someone who knows jackshit about her, seem at least a little bit safer than the blue man who did know her, but for some reason he stopped talking to her.

But fine. Let's say he's really OK with it, enough to tell us something about the spell we need deciphered. Can you not see him just giving us some vague riddle about it then telling us "THAT IS ALL I CAN TELL YOU!" and then not co-operate with us? Where as H-Poo would probably be more straightforward and say "Oh yeah, I know someone who knows this stuff. Just go here." and then point us in the right direction?
>>
>>1418051
Archive where
>>
Writefaggotry I made on discord
Lance Quest part 1
https://pastebin.com/8CvbeuaS
>>
>>1422587
>But fine. Let's say he's really OK with it, enough to tell us something about the spell we need deciphered. Can you not see him just giving us some vague riddle about it then telling us "THAT IS ALL I CAN TELL YOU!" and then not co-operate with us? Where as H-Poo would probably be more straightforward and say "Oh yeah, I know someone who knows this stuff. Just go here." and then point us in the right direction?
I think it's the other way around entirely.

Hekapoo was the one that made Marco run around doing who knows what for 16 years for a pair of dimensional scissors while Ludo only had to ask Glossaryk to teach him magic and he did.
>>
>>1422612
Yeah, but the thing with Heckapoo fucking with Marco for sixteen years was that was meant to be a test to prove himself. Once he'd proven himself as a worthy person she didn't seem to want to mess with him as much.

And I swear Glossaryck is playing the longest game with Ludo. He does everything with a reason, and there had to be one with Ludo. And even with that, there's still that whole problem with him knowing and possibly being on bad terms with Mummy that's a problem.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not against seeing Glossy. If we gotta do it we gotta do it. I just think that H-Poo is the safer first option.
>>
>>1422650
>And I swear Glossaryck is playing the longest game with Ludo. He does everything with a reason, and there had to be one with Ludo. And even with that, there's still that whole problem with him knowing and possibly being on bad terms with Mummy that's a problem.
I find this hard to believe when Glossaryk had the chance to go back to Star when she used the All-Seeing-Eye to locate him. What could Glossaryk want with Ludo or Toffee that required him to earn their trust and make them even more powerful than they already where?

Hekapoo might sill be safer alternative, of course. After all, Luna already had plans of seeing her with us.
>>
>>1422606
Changed name to Luna Wars
>>
>>1422656
That moment actually cemented the idea that Glossaryck was staying with Ludo as apart of his master plan. Mostly the line "maybe this is what you need..."

To me, it seems like he's using Ludo/Toffee as a teaching tool for Star. Like say, he's using the return of Toffee as one big life lesson for Star.
>>
>>1421518
Discord channel link plz
>>
>>1422678
https://discord.gg/7UW97
>>
>>1422679
Thank you
>>
>>1422606
This is wonderfully neat, Anon! Keep writing. Can't wait to see what you do!
>>
Hey boys
I made a little greentext fanfiction about a girl i hope to see more of in this quest.

https://pastebin.com/tAFkCTGP

Please enjoy and if you find any mistakes or have any criticism let me know.
>>
Rolled 20 (1d20)

Rollan dice for no reason
>>
>>1423053
cool, I got a 20
>>
>>1423053
Stop rolling
>>
Rolled 14 (1d20)

>>1423056
nah
>>
>>1423044
Continue?
>>
>>1423146
Maybe i wanna know from Quest if im getting her character down or not.
What do you think, any think you liked or disliked?
>>
>>1423150
I'd say it's fine for a short little greentext, but if I had to summon up some critique I'd say work on your prose. It's very average and doesn't really strike emotion or character.
>>
>>1423150
If you truly seek a critique from someone, then allow me to chip in (though I must make mention that you would likely get a better critique from Quest):

Most - if not all of - my dislikes with your story are merely spelling-related, as is courtesy of my Grammar Nazi tendencies.
Likewise, it would be aside from the fact that I feel you misspelled Anon Ymous as Anon Ymose that most of your errors were in the last 'grouping' of greentexts, such as how I feel that - in Line 77 - not only is there a lack of comma after the 'bone' but you also misspelled the 'you're' that comes right after.

But even in terms of Grammar Corrections, I don't feel there's enough to constitute your story as bad in most any fashion. Otherwise, I somewhat dig your story (even though I sadly feel >>1423163 drives a fair point).

Just my opinion though. As I said, I think Quest would have a better word about this sort of stuff, since I ain't the one writing up quests.
>>
>>1423163
Ok that's understandable, any advice on how to fix that? Are my descriptions not descriptive enough, or is it just the general style of the writing.
Point me in the right direction.

>>1423167
Ah yes, I knew there would be some fuck ups regarding Spelling and Grammar. One of the reasons I wrote it in greentext is i find its easier to get away with grammer mistakes when writing in that style.
Spelling mistakes are the bane of my existence, and its been something I've been struggling with for a while.
Ill make sure to fix those, and do better for the future.
Thanks.
>>
Any more discord links?
>>
>>1423268
https://discord.gg/Fxsdp
>>
Dammit, it expired, again.
>>
>>1423965
Here.
https://discord.gg/fc23W6C
>>
>>1423995
>He isn't using permanent links

Jesus, it's not that hard.
>>
Invalid or Expired.
How long do these things last anyway?
>>
>>1424042
Exactly 30 seconds before it self-destructs.
>>
Jesus fuck just post one without a time limit.
Here:https://discord.gg/NzUpuhY
>>
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>That entire shitpost variety hour
>Two Babies One Fox
>Gore Porn
>Weird Monster Porn
>All because an AltStar said "you won't do it"
>>
>>1422656
>ywn visit Hekapoo with Mommy
Why even live, if we can't give Mommy the opportunity to see his little Hero grow alongside her?
>>
>>1424517
her*
fml
>>
>>1424517
>Implying she wouldn't be proud to see how far we came from when she last Anon

Might've missed when he was growin', but she'd be happy either way.
>>
>>1424253
>posting about Discord cancer in the thread
kys
>>
So, what're our options and what're we doing?

It's most likely gonna be nighttime by the time we wake up; we can skip a school day and go for the Hekapoo ritual the moment we wake up, or we can do it the moment we get out of school the next day to save time. If we're lucky, we get a realm with the "1 minute = 1 year" thing going on, so time wont be an issue either way while we work for Anon's wand.

Or, we go to Glossaryck instead. Possibly the next day; unless we want to storm Marco's house to see the book.
>>
>>1424747
Wake up? What do you mean? We're still awake. We're super awake, thanks to Janna healing us.

But, I adamantly vote against going to see Glossaryck. Quest said the answer to our book problems lied out in the universe, and to do that we'll need scissors. So we should, like, really get on summoning H-Poo
>>
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Session delayed until 6:30 UCT.
>>
>>1424777
To be fair, who's to say Quest isn't technically being riddle-some with his phrasing, and that by 'out in the universe', he would actually mean "Ah, well what a coincidence: Glossaryck so happens to exist our there in the universe in comparison to your current position, and you just have to traverse all the way to Marco's House!"?

But otherwise, I do indeed feel it might be more correct to visit Hekapoo.

My only gripes with Hekapoo, though, are not only that our bread is shitty, but also we might not be able to perform a demonstration proving ourselves worthy. Whereas going to Glossaryck merely requires that we be at reasonable enough terms with Star and/or Marco that we can visit their house to speak to him.
>>
>>1424874
If Mami told us of the ritual, I think we're capable of showing our power that will be satisfactory.
>>
>>1424867
Is that Just or Lust?
>>
>>1425137
That would be like Glossaryck telling Star of the Darkness Chapter. Just because we were introduced to it, doesn't mean we're ready for it yet.
>>
>>1425168
whatever your heart desires.
>>
>>1425174
Let's try anyway; summoning materails are cheap. We should be good
>>
>>1425202
Well one thing's for sure: I doubt our Shitty Bread will fly by with Hekapoo. We ARE trying to attract her attention after all; if we're gonna do it, we might as well do it WELL.

Ergo, I suggest we purchase some good bread before trying.
>>
>>1425211
Fine! We'll get fucking better bread! We still need to not get shitty peanut butter anyway.
>>
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QUEST YOU'RE LATE BY 30 SECONDS NOW
>>
>>1425211
Why not make our own bread? That might get us some brownie points with her
>>
RIP quest, he died due to other QMs placing a bounty on his head

F
>>
>>1425251
F
>>
>>1425251
Nefcy got hanged by Jarco supporters
>>
>>1425251
He died because I rolled badly on the Sonic Totem.
F

>>1425248

>implying Anon can cook
>>
SESSION START

>You are Anon
>Slayer of Sea-Trolls
>Disser of Carnival workers
>Eater of chili dogs
>Sitting in the back of a friend's car as you head home from cutting school to hit the beach
>This time you're not riding alone with Janna
>You're riding with JACKIE and Janna
>Both of which are kinna huddled up on you
>Oskarr climbed onto you all too at first
>A: "Oskarr."
>O: "Yeah?"
>A: "You have to drive."
>O: "Oh. Right."
>It's been an insane Monday
>You still have school tomorrow
>You still don't know where your mom was this morning
>Or how to get back on track for your quest
>Reviving Luna
>Your teacher
>Your guiding light
>Someone in the magical world has to know how to fix THE BOOK
>You remember the ritual Luna showed you
>A circle of red clay
>Bottled Lightning
>A sandwich made of Peanut Butter, Banana and Strawberry Jelly
>Weird
>Oskarr pulls up to your house
>O: "We're here, muchachos."
>A: "Denada."
>Jackie holds on to your hand as you hop out
>J: "Hey."
>A: "Hey, yourself."
>J: "Did you mean what you said?"
>A: "..."
>J: "About tearing the world apart? For me?"
>A: "..."
>You grin, wipe some of the blood from underneath your nose.
>A: "See you at school, ok?"
>They drive off
>As you pop into the house a sight you normally never see lays before you
>Your mom
>Dressed well
>Like, really well
>She looks like an 80s commercial model
>Her hair has been done
>She has her nice purse out
>New looking shoes
>She's passed out but...that's not so unusal


WAKE HER UP?
or
GO TO ROOM?
>>
>>1425291
>GO TO ROOM?
Fuck her we need our rest.
>>
>>1425291
WAKE UP
>>
>>1425291
Go to room
>>
>>1425291
Wake her up. Gotta make sure she's alright.
>>
>>1425291
WAKE HER UP
>>
To wake or not to wake is the question
>>
>>1425291
Let's wake her up, see what's up.
>>
>>1425291
go to room
>>
>>1425291
>Wake her up
Now I'm curious
>>
>>1425291
GO TO ROOM
>>
>>1425291
Better wake this drunk bint up ay
>>
>>1425291
Wake her up, ask what was up with that dog food this morning.
>>
>>1425291
>Wake her up
We must be a good child, and inform our mom that we love her.
>>
>>1425291
wake her up
>>
>>1425291
>GO TO ROOM?
>>
>>1425291
>>1425291
>80s comercial model
oh no... oh god no, Star gave her money to try and make things better, and she spent it on shit didn't she...

Also:
J
BUT WHICH ONE
>>
>>1425291
I guess we try and wake her up. We should try to be gentle about it though.
>>
>>1425291
>Wake Her Up
>Hug?
>>
>>1425319
Why not both?
>>
>>1425291
I hope ma got a nice date or something. She deserves better.
>>
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>>1425324
>>
>>1425319
Shit this might be bad
>>
>>1425324
Change to this
>>
Prediction on today's thread boys?
>>
>>1425338
we nearly die
>>
>>1425338
Baseball.
>>
>>1425338
we fuck up.
a bunch
>>
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>>1425338
Progress on the road to Starfu.
>>
>>1425338
We summon hekapoo and get our scissors
>>
>>1425291
Go to room
>>
>>1425338
Muscles get his arm ass grabbed by the girls
>>
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>>1425338
We keep tumbling down?
>>
>>1425346
No, stop it.
>>
>>1425291
She's prolly had a long day. Let's just go to our room.
>>
COUNTING THE VOTES!
>>
>A circle of red clay
We got that.

>Bottled Lightning
Uh anyone got ideas

>A sandwich made of Peanut Butter, Banana and Strawberry Jelly
Well we got shit bread, and Jelly i think.
But we don't have PB and i think we should get higher quality bread before we do anything.
>>
>>1425394
Power outlet.
>>
>>1425394
maybe lightning bugs in a jar?
or a battery? I mean its technically contained in something jar like.
>>
>>1425394
>Bottled Lightning
>Uh anyone got ideas

Jumper cables, power station, simulated lightning.

Also, mind telling me WHEN it stated we got shit bread? As far as I know we just got shit butter and then didn't buy it. When did Quest say that the bread was shit? Like, I genuinely want to know.
>>
>>1425394
>Bottled Lightning
Put a battery in a bottle?
>>
>>1425413
>>1425409
>>1425394
Luna said 'Free Range Lightning' also works.
>>
>>1425409
I believe it was in one of the Inventory Checks a while back?

If I recall, it was before we left home after finding out Mom had dogfood.
>>
>>1425423
Exactly. Meaning not bottled. Really, it seems like the actual electricity is the important factor, not the in the bottle part.
>>
>>1425428
I stand corrected.
>>
>>1425296
>>1425298
>>1425306
>>1425308
>>1425316
>>1425356
Go to room: 6

>>1425297
>>1425300
>>1425301
>>1425304
>>1425307
>>1425309
>>1425312
>>1425314
>>1425315
>>1425322
Wake her up: 10

>Mom's music channel plays in your eyes as you think about what to do
>Nothing has ever been right with her life
>Her husband
>Her own choices
>You...

https://youtu.be/nLEOwgm7OUQ?list=RDQMaogeNzR14GM

>You shuffle mom's shoulder a little
>A: "Mom? It's me."
>She mumbles something, rolls over to her side
>You smell alcohol but she doesn't reek or anything
>Weird
>A: "Mom. C'mon you have a bed, ya goob."
>A palm meets your face
>Not hard, just a -pap- in the nose
>M: "In some countries a family can disown kids that call their moms 'goobs.' "
>A: "U.S.A. U.S.A."
>You chuckle
>Only a little nervous about where she's been
>She snickers, finally getting up off the couch
>Her hair is flat on one side
>M: "I'm up. I'm up little goob-spawn."
>A: "Where were you today?"
>M: "Getting groceries...I uh."
>She smiles, eyes still closed against the light of the T.V.
>M: "Saw an old friend."
>Your desire to know more intensifies so much it appears in the subtitles
>M: "I'm gonna hit the hay. You should too if you don't have any homework."
>A: "Y-yeah."
>You are Anon
>14 year old fighter mcwizard skeleton
>Still afraid of your mom catching you ditching
>She drifts upstairs to her room
>Leaving you with the couch


WHAT DO?

>MAKE THE SANDWICH?
>HEAD TO ROOM?
>OTHER?
>>
>>1425448
MAKE THE SANDWICH
>>
>>1425448
ASSEMBLE THE SANDWICH
>>
>>1425448
Do we need dinner?
Were we fed more by the friends?
>>
>>1425448
Make the sandwich
>>
>>1425448
>Head to room
No pb
No good bread
Ritual sandwich can wait.
>>
>>1425448
>Make two sandwiches
>try the sandwich first to see if it's quality enough for a "goddess"
>head to room
>>
>>1425448
>Head to Room
>Contact Star
We forgot to talk to her earlier, as we promised.
>>
>>1425448
whats the quality of the bread?
>>
>>1425448
MAKE FOODWICH!
>>
>>1425448
>MAKE THE SANDWICH?
Well ok
Lets get this stared
>>
SANDWITCH
>>
>>1425459
this
>>
>>1425448
we don't have any peanut butter to make the sandwich. go to bed.
>>
>>1425448
Wait, do we even have the peanut butter? If so, make the sandwich. If not, I guess it's off to bed.
>>
>>1425448
Make the sandwich
>>
>>1425448
head to room
>>
>>1425469
We don't have good peanut butter... unless it's in the groceries.

Check Groceries I guess for good bread, peanut butter, jelly, and bananas.
>>
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>>1425448
I guess we're making the sandwich. I thought that we didn't have peanut butter, but I guess Mom got some while we were out.
>>
>>1425484
See! That's called using your fuckin' brain!
>>
>>1425448
QUEST SAYS BRACE YOURSELVES
>>
>>1425454
>>1425455
>>1425457
>>1425459
>>1425463
>>1425464
>>1425465
>>1425472
>>1425476
>>1425484
>mfw everyone forgets we have shitty bread and likely no peanut butter
>inb4 Quest reveals we tried to make the sandwich, but forgot we don't have the proper ingredients
>inb4 we wasted resources
>>
AH SHIT.
REV UP THOSE DICE!
>>
>>1425494
Dude! Use your fuckin' brain! Mom went food shopping! Quest is now suggesting it! There's a 86% that Mom got the shit we need!
>>
>>1425494
>wasted two slices of bread and a portion of a jar of jelly
Wow, how will we ever recover?
>>
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>>1425448
>>1425448
>>1425484
>>1425478
>>1425476
>>1425472
>>1425469
>>1425467
>>1425464
>>1425463
>>1425461
>>1425459
>>1425457
>>1425455
>>1425454

>Purpose fills you...
>You
>Enter
>THE KITCHEN

https://youtu.be/qzVBqBosf5w


>BEFORE YOU LIE THE INGREDIENTS

>SHITTY GAS STATION WHITE BREAD
>BANANAS
>MOM'S FAVORITE CREAMY PEANUT BUTTER
>STRAWBERRY JELLY

>You, Anon must cook this sandwich for a GOD
>One that could hold the secret to reviving your lost mentor
>There is NO room for error...
>Or laziness
>You've been cooking for yourself since you were 9
>You crack your knuckles
>Muscles shivers from the sensation
>It begins


THE WAR OF THE SANDWICH HAS BEGUN

YOU WILL MAKE TWO IDENTICAL SANDWICHES

VOTE HERE FOR THE INGREDIENTS AND PREP


https://strawpoll.com/76517xr
>>
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>>1425518
IT BEGIIIIIIIIIIIIINS
>>
>>1425518
This shit ain't a game.
Diagonal Slice or BUST
>>
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IF THIS AIN'T YOUR SANDWICH YOUR SANDWICH IS GARBAGE
>>
>>1425518
Daily Reminder:

All No Crust voters are uncivilized cowards.
>>
>>1425518
BANANAS ON A SANDWICH IS FUCKING CANCER
>>
>>1425533
I agree with this faggot.

There is scientific proof that diagonally sliced bread tastes better and psychologically more favorable for human consumption.
>>
>>1425540
>Raw Bananas
what are you, a monkey?
>>
>>1425518
T O A S T E D B R E A D
O
A
S
T
E
D
B
>>
>>1425518
> toasted
> crust
> sliced bananas
> peanut butter and jelly on bread
> diagonal

If this isn't your sandwich, kindly have a cup of bleach
>>
>>1425544
THATS HOW HEKAPOO LIKES IT YOU DUM
>>
TWO MINUTES REMAIN

WHAT SHALL BE THE SANDWICH OF THE GODS?
>>
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>>1425540
>Giving the Goddess of dimensional travel Bananas.
ARE YOU NIGGAS TRYING TO GET ANON KILLED
>>
>>1425551
>crust
Fuck outta here
>>
>>1425556
WE DON'T NEED TO CATER TO HER SHITTY FUCKING TASTES
>>
>>1425560
THATS HOW SHE LIKES IT
>>
>>1425560
She fucking likes bananas on it.
>>
>>1425564
THE SANDWICH IS FOR HER YOU IGNORAMUS
>>
>>1425563
> being too much of a manbaby to eat your crusts

I bet you still call your mom into the bathroom to wipe your ass too
>>
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>>1425518
HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHA
>>
>>1425581
FUCK YOU ANON
AND FUCK HEKALEWD FOR HAVING SHIT TASTE
>>
>>1425594
FUCK OFF B1 BATTLE DROID
>>
>>1425591
WHO ARE YOU ON DISCORD FAGGOT
>>
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>>1425543
>>1425544
>>1425547
>>1425549
>>1425550
>>1425551
>>1425556
>>1425560
>>1425563
>>1425564
>>1425571
>>1425580
>>1425582
>>1425591

https://youtu.be/BjDaPOWdx6s


>Looking down upon your creation, pride swells in your chest
>The perfect creation

>A diagonal sliced sandwich
>With Peanut butter on each slice of golden toasted bread
>A sea of warm jelly coats the flawless medallions of sliced banana you pulled from the fruit
>You craft a second one, just to be safe
>You bite in voraciously
>The crunch
>The heat
>The sugary sweetness
>The salty burn of the peanut butter
>The creamy bananas
>It's too much
>Muscles is jealous that you're the only one with tastebuds


CHALLENGE COMPLETE!
SO ENDS THE SANDWICH WAR!

>You head up to your room and pull out your remnants of THE BOOK
>Using the diagram inside you scrawl out the circle you need on a piece of paper
>After some practice, it looks alright
>Time to try it for real

>Your phone buzzes
>It buzzes again
>And again
>Oh wait
>Someone is calling you...
>It's an unknown, local number


ANSWER THE PHONE!?

Y/N
>>
>>1425622
YES
>>
>>1425622
>ANSWER IT
>>
>>1425622
NO
>>
Y
>>
>>1425622
YES
THEN WE HANG-UP ON THEM AFTER WE FIND OUT WHO THEY ARE
>>
>>1425622
I do not see why not! Answer!

Also, GUARD THAT PERFECT FUCKING SANDWICH LIKE IT'S OUR LATE MOTHER!
>>
>>1425622
YES
>>
>>1425622
NO, we have more important things to do. Probably a telemarketer anyways.
>>
>>1425622
Whatever PICK UP the phone but make sure to say we are on a time limit.
>>
>>1425622
Y.
>>
>>1425622
N
Fucking scam artists
>>
>>1425622
God damn it, fine.
>>
>>1425622
Y
Might as well
>>
>>1425622
COMPLETE THE RITUAL
>>
>>1425622
yes
>>
>>1425622
>Yes.

Answer THE PHONE
>>
So who want's to bet it's gonna be Star, who out of guilt bought a phone so she could be more prepared to help us in the future.
Here or someone related to Alpho
or maybe Sabrina, or something i don't know
>>
20 bucks it's Star
>>
>>1425669
I bet its marco
>>
>>1425669
I got money on Star or Marco

Also how did our phone survive the ocean? Probably a Nokia.
>>
>>1425622
PICK UP THE FUCKING PHONE
>>
>>1425669
Implying it isn't our future self giving us a warning to not screw up.
>>
>>1425660
I'm willing to bet it's actually Hekapoo, and this is her way of communicating to us.
>>
>>1425622
>YES

Also QM, has anyone reported or talked about the troll that appeared on the beach? I got this feeling it would be all over the news by now.
>>
>>1425622
Pick up the phone, but be ready to hang up if it isn't important.
>>
>>1425622
Yes, but put on a voice and say it's Bob Williams or something.
>>
>>1425624
>>1425626
>>1425629
>>1425631
>>1425632
>>1425633
>>1425637
>>1425638
>>1425644
>>1425652
>>1425655

>A: "Aw, c'moooon!"
>You gripe, dropping the hunk of river clay from your fingers
>Your phone's buzzing silences as you slap the answer button
>A: "Moshi Moshi."
>You spit, not realizing how much weeb just spewed out of you
>???: "Nondo! Brudda dude!"
>A: "Justin?"
>Ju: "You know it! How yah livin' man?"
>A: "Uh y'know just..."
>You look over at the diabolical runes covering your desk
>The river clay
>Your blood soaked clothes
>A: "L-like a gangster."
>Ju: "Haha! Awesome. I hate to call you about a favor the first time but I kind of need your help this Friday."
>A: "Why?"
>Ju: "I know you're not much of a sports guy...but that arm of yours is crayzay. Like. Steve-O pre rehab and Ryan Dunn's death crazy."
>A: "Rest in rip."
>Ju: "Peace be with him."
>A: "He's fuckin' Dunn, Son."
>Ju: "Aw, aw dude not cool."
>A: "You're still laughing!"
>Ju: "Aha! Ok ok it's messed up and funny. Dude tho forreal we need you. We're going up against the best team in the District..."
>A: "Justin, I've never even run more than 20 feet unless my life was in danger."
>This isn't even an exaggeration
>Ju: "I just thought maybe you'd want a chance to make it up to Ferg."
>A: "Who?"
>Ju: "Wow. That kid you sent on a pantsless air-trip?"
>A: "Oh! OH THE MASCOT GUY!?"
>Ju: "Yah. He's gonna be there. Big shock, I know. If you were there, made up with him and helped us get out of this game without getting creamed I'm sure it would mean a lot..."
>A: "Well..."

WHAT DO YOU SAY TO JUSTIN?
>>
>>1425732
We'll try to be there, but there's no promises. Who knows what we'll be doing on friday? We might be dead by then.
>>
>>1425732
Sure, why not
>>
>>1425732
"Meet you on friday man, right now I need to do some important stuff"
>>
SEE YOU THERE JUSTIN
>>
>>1425732
Secret DEMON route time!

>"Sorry man, but I'm really busy right now. Life's really messed up for me. Can't make it."
>>
>>1425732
Sure we will help.
>>
>>1425732
Mmmmmmmmm, we gotta do this ritual, but we already dogged Justin once and we don't wanna lose him as a buddy. So I say we go help him out.
>>
>>1425732
Y E S.

For our bro, Justin.
And to make it tup to Ferg.
>>
>>1425756
Demon route is best route.
>>
>>1425732
We want to keep on good terms with Justin to keep him on our side, and "making it up" for Ferg can add him to our list of friends.

Or, to look at it coldly: they're more bloodbags we can rely on if we're near dying like before.
>>
>>1425732
>"Totes, dude! I'll be there. A'ight, talk to you later."
>>
>>1425732
>"Sure, man. I can help out friday."
>>
>>1425732
see ya then justin
>>
>>1425732
What is the current date.
If this doesn't interfere with any current plans then I'm game.
>>
>>1425732
sure thing,if we are still alive for friday...
>>
>>1425732
ALRIGHT LETS DO IT
>>
>>1425732
>Make it up to Fergusson
>We're no bully
Sure man, just tell me the time and I'll see if I can't wreck some faces.
>>
>>1425732
We'll tell him we'll do our best to make it, but with how our life has been going the past week, we can't make any solid promises.
>>
What day is it today? Monday?
>>
>>1425732
>>1425758
It's monday now, and that thing is on friday, so we've got fuckloads of time.

FUCK YEAH LET'S GO BE JOCKS
>>
>>1425781
Yep. It's Monday night. We got plenty of time.
>>
>>1425732
"I can't guarantee being there because of... family reasons. But if it clears, then I'll be there for sure."
>>
>>1425732
Of course Brohammad.
>>
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>>1425751
>>1425752
>>1425753
>>1425757
>>1425758
>>1425760
>>1425763
>>1425764
>>1425765
>>1425766
>>1425767
>>1425769
>>1425772
>>1425773
>>1425774
>>1425782
>>1425790
>>1425791

>A: "You know, what? Yeah."
>Ju: "WOOOOOOO!!!! YEAH! I Knew you were dead-ass!"
>A: "I'm what ass?"
>Ju: "DEAD-ASS B! It's an east coast thing I picked up from my Uncle! THAT'S YOU! Nondo. The Main Mondo. Dead-ass HONDO!"
>You have no idea what the fuck language he speaks
>You don't speak Ball-Sport
>A: "Catch yah later-"

WHAT BRO NAME DO YOU GIVE JUSTIN!?

PROVIDE SUGGESTIONS FOR THE BRO-ENING
>>
>>1425782
>Wanting to be a shitty Jock
Nigga we don't got time and we have negative STR. That won't work out and we don't have time to make it work.
>>
>>1425815
J-Justingator!
>>
>>1425815
J-10
>>
>>1425815
Juro
>>
>>1425815
"J-man."
>>
>>1425815
>Catchya later Broski Brojulating Broington of Brosville!!
>>
>>1425815
Emperor Justinian, or just Justinian.
>>
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>>1425815
Biggie Jay
>>
>>1425815
justinator
>>
>>1425815
Emperor Justinian I of the Brozantine Empire
>>
>>1425815

>>1425831
I can work with this.
>>
>>1425836
This one.
>>
>>1425815
Just "J" Justin, Just-man baby.
>>
>>1425824
Haha, alright go with this.
>>
>>1425836
Supporting
>>
>>1425824
I'm good with this if it's his Football number
>>
>>1425836
This
>>
>>1425815
Brojulating is good
>>
>>1425824
This
>>
>>1425836
This is way too long to be a standardized nickname. Maybe like occasionally?
>>
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>>1425824
J-10 with three

>>1425836
EMPEROR OF BROZANTINE WITH 4!


>A: "Catch yah later, Brozantine."
>J: "AWWW Dude! Sick tag. The lunch bro's are gonna be jealous."
>A: "Y-yeah it's a reference to an emperor. He was a Justin too."
>J: "..."
>Did you spaghetti too ha-
>J: "SSSIIIIICCCCCCCCCC!! WE ROYALTY NOW MOTHERFU-"
CLACK!
>He must have slammed down his phone like he was hanging up
>On a non land-line
>Jesus, Justin
>You save his number and turn back to the desk
>It's time
>"Hold on, Luna."
>You draw out the circle in your formerly white carpet
>Ready the sandwich and flex muscles up to his full size.
>"Your baby boy's coming."


SESSION PAUSE

We break until 10:30pm US CENTRAL TIME

Thanks for playing, Brometheans!
>>
>>1425815
Jupiter
>>
>>1425891
Welp Time for Waiting music.
Anyone got some?
>>
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>>1425891
>10:30pm
>>
>>1425891
>inb4 our nickname ends up being like The Kingmaker or something
>>
>>1425905
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=M5frpXFwAHQ
>>
>>1425905
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lsfhADiaP5E
find a ten hour version of this, maybe?
>>
>>1425905
https://youtu.be/WNIPqafd4As
>>
>>1425928
This is waiting music?
>>
>>1425939
I had to listen to it on repeat while on hold once so i assumed it was
>>
>>1425891
>10:30pm
>The agony of choosing between sleep for upcoming finals and this quest.
>>
>>1425946
Finals. The quest will be here in the morning.
>>
>>1425905
This ain't too bad.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wr0WgRM_NW0
>>
>>1425905
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XSZl2g-Lx10&list=LL8neUW9fgfR3S0Uo6xEXK8Q&index=4
>>
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Okay, if our Hekachallenge is anything like Marco's was, we'll be dealing with a long timeskip (hopefully). What should we prioritize getting? Remember, all physical changes barring the Mark of Hekapoo are lost upon return but not gear or carried objects.
>>
>>1426185
we should prioritize knowledge. spells that we find, what makes things tick, or even undead buddies.
>>
>>1426185
Going to have a giggle if you all get hyped for long time skip stuff only for it to be just a simple, thanks for the sandwich here have some scissors. Because Marco was a putz and asshole to Hekapoo
>>
>>1426212
I expect we'll get a different challenge. One that won't take as long.
>>
>>1426185
Chr and STR

Chr because we need to be a silver tongue motherfucker if we are gonna manipulate the whole school/town/world/universe.

STR because its our worst stat, and I don't wanna lose arm wrestling matches with Marco.
>>
>>1426237
Unless we're gonna fuckin' arm wrestle with our left hand, we got Muscles.
>>
>>1426185
>inb4 we cast Combust in a fashion that focuses on absorbing Hekapoo's flame, instantly ending the challenge
>>
>>1426256
either way I don't wanna be a skinny bitch forever.
I want to be the Lich King because of what we do not how we look.
>>
>>1426261
Pure strength isn't the only way to be strong.
>>
>>1426261
I see no problem with that helps all the same
>>
>>1425905
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4OMda91q20c
>>
>>1425905
https://youtu.be/c9y-n9B_XUM
>>
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SESSION RESUME


>Lightning cracks outside your window
>Weird

https://youtu.be/2KnyL4IFcwo

>A church bell rings in the distance
>Line by line you finish the circle
>Making sure to trace the symbols of cutting blades and the curvature of this demon-goddesses' horns well
>You clutch the sandwich you prepared
>Still warm
>Still delicious
>You need proof of your power
>After a moment you look to Muscles
>He's made of your magic
>From the resilience and resourcefulness you employed
>To escape the death world beyond THE HOLE
>oh
>Oh wow that's still just part of the school bathroom
>That might be somebody's problem later
>Either way, you have a construct for an extremity
>That'll be proof enough
>Now for the lightning
>You ponder for a moment
>It could mean any number of things
>Lightning strikes again outside
>You know one cannot actually bottle lightning
>Not without pre-existing magical powers
>Could it be a metaphor?
>Do you play a shitty one-hit wonder to summon this demon?
>Or rip the wires from your wall...
Maybe a car battery! You have several old ones in the garage.

What do?
>>
>>1426398
First, let's try a car battery. If that doesn't work, try to make a home made lightning rod.
>>
>>1426398
>car battery
>>
>>1426398
Car battery would work or even better try to do a battery in a bottle to see what happens
>>
>>1426398
Jury rig every car battery we have to simulate lightning!
>>
>>1426398
>Or rip the wires from your wall...
This, the more destructive this process is, the better.
>>
>>1426398
Car battery
>>
>>1426398
Try car battery. Or regular batteries.
>>
car batery
>>
>>1426398
Car battery
>>
>>1426398
Wait:

Lighting in a bottle? What about those tesla coil toys in the glass ball? That's close enough to a bottle.
>>
>>1426398
Lets try a car battery
>>
>>1426398
>Car battery
>start thinking of your hit single while you're going down to get it
>>
>>1426431
Do we have one?
>>
>>1426398
Let's try a car battery first, but we should be prepared to use a ghetto lightning rod.
>>
>>1426398
Try a car battery first, let's see if that works.
>>
>>1426398
Get your laboratory class googles and a car battery from the garage. Labcoat too if we have one.
We need to be professional about this.
>>
>>1426456
We're a freshman in highschool, not college.
>>
>>1426463
You didn't have labcoats and googles for lab projects in highschool?
>>
File: Spoiler Image (158 KB, 500x500)
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Rolled 9 (1d10)

>>1426408
>>1426410
>>1426413
>>1426419
>>1426422
>>1426427
>>1426432
>>1426433
>>1426442
>>1426456

>Flock of Seagulls and their one major hit creeps into your head as you jog down the stairs
>You ran...you ran so far away
>Ran all night and day
>Not really
>If you did that you probably would have had friends from doing sports
>None of this would have happened
>You wonder about the other worlds as you grab the biggest car battery you see
>The VOLT-ron XXX 90D series
>There's a squirt emoji on the logo
>You gag at the bastardization of internet culture
>Mom's jumper cables are a cinch to hook up
>Even with the flashbacks you get of dad beating your ass with them at your 11th birthday party your hands remain steady
>Mom was so drunk she was laughing
>You clear your head and stand mightily over the circle...
>The air feels supercharged
>Almost
>Alive
>You haven't done magic on your own before
>Only the spells Mom taught you
>Are rituals like this safe?
>No way to know
>What's going to happen?
>Lightning cracks outside
>The thunder makes your window shudder off all the moisture upon it
>You take a deep breath...and SLAM THE CABLES TOGETHER!

https://youtu.be/NrOemQaEJGU

>LIGHTNING BURSTS FROM THE METAL CLAMPS
>ELECTRICITY DANCES ACROSS YOUR WALLS
>THE CARPET
>YOUR BED
>"OH SHIT!"
>THE SHEETS BURN
>YOUR DESK IMMOLATES
>The circle begins to glow...
>THE CABLES TWIST LIKE ANGRY SERPENTS!


ROLL STRENGTH TO HANG ON, KID!
>>
Rolled 14 + 8 (1d20 + 8)

>>1426501
HANG ON, BUDDY
>>
Rolled 16 + 8 (1d20 + 8)

>>1426501
ROLLAN
>>
Rolled 5 + 8 (1d20 + 8)

>>1426501
>>
Rolled 13 + 5 (1d20 + 5)

>>1426501
>>
Rolled 12 + 8 (1d20 + 8)

>>1426501
>>
Rolled 2 + 5 (1d20 + 5)

>>1426501
>>
Rolled 8 + 8 (1d20 + 8)

>>1426501
>>
Rolled 17 + 8 (1d20 + 8)

>>1426501
>>
>>1426501
>>
Rolled 10 + 8 (1d20 + 8)

>>1426501
THE EMPEROR PROTECTS
>>
Rolled 14 + 8 (1d20 + 8)

>>1426501
Oh fug
>>
>>1426520
Messed up there pal
>>
Rolled 4 + 8 (1d20 + 8)

>>
Rolled 17 + 8 (1d20 + 8)

>>1426501
Time to make H-Poo.... THUNDERSTRUCK!
>>
Rolled 1 + 8 (1d20 + 8)

>>1426501
>jumper cable reference
>>
Rolled 16 + 8 (1d20 + 8)

>>1426501
Viente porfa
>>
Rolled 9 + 8 (1d20 + 8)

>>1426501
>>
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>>1426531
NEVER SHOULD'VE COME HERE
>>
Rolled 16 + 8 (1d20 + 8)

>>1426501
VEINTE VEN A MI!
>>
File: 1396595969566.png (526 KB, 520x500)
526 KB
526 KB PNG
>>1426531
>>
Rolled 18 + 8 (1d20 + 8)

>>1426501
Rollin
>>
Rolled 8 + 8 (1d20 + 8)

>>1426501
>>
Rolled 8 + 8 (1d20 + 8)

>>1426501
>>
>>1426531
Fug I blew it
>>
Rolled 5 + 8 (1d20 + 8)

>>1426501
Me no habla espagnol
>>
>>1426501
>pls get 20
>>
Rolled 6 + 8 (1d20 + 8)

>>1426606
no
>>
Rolled 2 + 8 (1d20 + 8)

>>1426501
whoops typo
>>
Rolled 14 + 8 (1d20 + 8)

>>1426501
>>
actually
>a small boy lying wounded and defenseless against a hekapoo

this could be lewd
>>
>>1426509
WINNER!

>13

>>1426531
-2

>11!

>WHAM!
>You got bucked like a weak kneed buck-a-roo at his first rodeo
>Your head left a nasty imprint in the drywall
>Despite your presence, the ritual continues
>With arcing lightning that twists and coils, scorching every surface in the room
>Your window rips itself open
>The pages of THE BOOK
are blasted into your face and lap
>Muscles and you scramble to get them together
>That's when a hot orange light explodes from the circle
>It's so bright
>You're forced to look away
>When your eyes raise up...

https://youtu.be/EhGEGIBGLu8

>There stands a white skinned woman
>Her legs powerfully filling out a billowing gown
>Her waist impressively broad, supporting a mighty and feminine frame
>Her face, the picture of serene cruelty
>She smirks, looking down from around her robust chest
>Her golden dress whips like the flames beneath her feet
>Rest in RIP your carpet
>Atop her head, crown of fire glows between her Lightning bolt shaped orange horns
>Her crimson hair flows like the stormy winds
>She is immovable
>She is Untouched by the chaos
>She's beautiful
>She's terrible
>She thicc
>She is the chaos
>Her eyes twinkle with sparks of hell itself
>Her smile is razor sharp
>A: "Whoah..."
>You're in the presence of a demon goddess

>H: "What kind of shrimpy warlock are you?"

What do?
>>
>>1426635
"The kind that made you a sandwich?"
>>
>>1426635
>offer sandvitch
>>
>>1426635
>You look thicc as fuck bby girl

Trust me on this lads, i'm a pickup artist
>>
>>1426638
>>1426635
Seconded
>>
give her a sanwitch as well as a good dicking
>>
>>1426635
supporting this>>1426638
>>
>>1426638
The only one of his kind.
>>
>>1426635
>"The kind that made for you a sandwich."
>"Well I mean, it's like, two halves of one, but I mean come on, you know what I mean."
>>
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>>1426635
>Holy Diver

>You're in the presence of a demon goddess
>>
>>1426635
>"The kind that needs dimensional scissors. And I hear you're the girl to ask about them. I even have a peanut butter, banana and strawberry jelly sandwich to trade for it."
>>
>>1426635
this>>1426638
>>
>>1426638
This
>>
>>1426635
I heard you like peanutbutter, jelly and banana sandwiches
>>
>>1426638
this
also add that you are also a sandwich warlock.
>>
>>1426656
>>1426658
These ones
>>
>>1426638
This plus warn her about Muscles.
>>
>>1426635
The kind who makes a great sandwich
>>
>>1426656
>>1426658
Supporting.
>>
>>1426635

>>1426658
Also supporting this one
>>
>>1426658
>>1426635
These two.
>>
>>1426656
This is good.
>>
>>1426658
We aren't gonna open with that for sure. Let her have the sammich first yo.
>>
>>1426696
Why not? The fuck does she think we summoned her here for? To play monopoly?
>>
>>1426701
M-Maybe?
>>
>>1426635
Would like to play a game of monopoly?
>>
>>1426701
Point is we're not TRADING the sammich for the scissors yo. That's almost insulting.
>>
>>1426714
This was a joke vote.
>>
>>1426714
Look at this Casanova motherfucker, supporting
>>
>>1426716
How the hell is a business transaction insulting? Like. "That's not how it works" maybe. But not insulting.
>>
>>1426721
Scissors are for those who have proven themselves.

The sandwich is just an offering. A part of the summoning ritual. Basically the Sandwich is just so that she listens to us and not kill us on the spot for wasting her time.
>>
>>1426721
Because we're giving a sandwich for an inter-dimensional traveling device.
>>
>>1426721
>>1426732
Fair business transactions happen between equals. This is a Demon Goddess listening to some twerp who managed to figure out the most basic of summoning spells.
>>
>>1426721
She'll just take it from us by force.

If it's going to be hers regardless, we may as will give it willingly and be on her good side.
>>
>>1426739
That seems less insulting and more laughable. But it's always nice to have confidence.

>>1426735
Not that insulting though. Again, more laughable. It'd be like if a kid tried to trade in his lunch for a car. Would you be insulted by that?
>>
>>1426635
>Give sandwich
>>
I don't think we're actually trading sandwich for scissors, it's just something to get on her good side. We still have to earn the scissors in whatever way she decides
>>
>>1426744
Oh..... OH! Oh my, I never meant the "trade ya" part of it meaning that I wanna withhold it from her until we get scissors. Just that "I got a sandwich for ya, can I get scissors?" kinda way. But I can see how it'd be easily misinterpreted.
>>
>>1426759
Maybe a shitton more politely. Once again, we're dealing with someone who has important things to do.

also MUSCLES NOOOOOOOO
>>
>>1426757
THIS.

>>1426759
No no.
THE SANDWICH is not the price of the Scissors, but merely of the summoning.
It's literally written on the summoning page that you need to the sandwich to summon her.

If you want an audience with Thickapooo you gotta pay your respects.

She could still take the sandwich from us, listen, and fuck off if she think we're not worth her time.
>>
>>1426773
>MUSCLES NOOOOOOOO
Oh god this
>>
>>1426773
She fucking led Marco on a wild goose chase for sixteen years. She does not have better things to do.

>>1426775
No shit, I know that. I was trying to be fucking witty beyond just saying "give sandwich to lady"
>>
>>1426782
>inb4 your 'wit' only earns us a goddess's disrespect, and we end up being denied our scissors

We'd be witty if her position of power allowed it, but we don't fuck around with gods.
>>
>>1426782
She probably has clones take care of her more boring duties.
>>
>>1426792
Hm. Think this one's a clone?
>>
>>1426638
This, but explicitly not
>>1426658
>>
>>1426797
>>1426792
Just think of how many people summon her just so they can later fap thinking of her?

Why do you think she's so thicc? It's all them PBJ sandwiches.
>>
>>1426797
It might be. I mean Marco only got the real Hekapoo because the real one noticed he was using her scissors, and went to retrieve them herself.

She might not personally answer all summonings.
>>
Is she going to be happy with a sammich we took a bite out of?
>>
>>1426829
That was our test sammich

we had a second
>>
>>1426829
We made two. One for testing. Second for her.

I've no idea f she'll like t.
>>
>>1426791
I don't think that acting like a little bitch around her will help improve her outlook on us either.

Even then, knowing H-Poo she'd prolly take my wit and throw her own back.
>>
>>1426837
Well if YOU were a god, would you prefer your worshippers used their offerings as bargaining chips, or that they humbly offered them to you?
>>
>>1426837
Saying "Sandwich = Dimensional Scissors" is not gonna improve it either.
>>
>>1426791
>we don't fuck around with gods

She probably gets ass-kissers a lot though.
>>
>Quest is offline
Pack it up, boys.
>>
>>1426848
If I were a god I wouldn't want my worshipers to be spineless losers, really.
Would take street cred from my cult with the other gods, ya know?

Still, one cannot allow disrespect.

>>1426859
This.
>>
>>1426848
If I was H-Poo I'd probably laugh and be entertained by this shrimpy kid and say "OK short stuff, you think you're worthy? Let's see what you got."

Which is the assumption I was actually going off of when I made said comment.
>>
>>1426862
>Hey guys the Quest will be on hiatus for twenty years, Anon needs to work for his scissors
It's not fair
>>
>>1426865
I don't see how what I said was fucking disrespectful! All I said was "you can help me get scissors and I can fill your belly with your favorite sandwich" not "OK Bitch, you give me my motha-fuckin' scissors and then I'll think about giving you this tasty sandwich!"
>>
>>1426879
unsure if fanf 2.0
>>
>>1426879
Using something required for the ritual as a bargaining chip is fucking retarded
>>
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>>1426879
anon don't let the bullies get to you, just make sure you are over the, posting age limit of 16
>>
>>1426890
Shit state is Shit
>>
>>1426879
What part of "saying that a sandwich is worth the same as a pair of dimensional scissors will make us look like a dumbass" you just dont get?
>>
>>1426885
It's not meant to be a bargaining chip! How many times do I have to explain this! It's meant to signal that I've got the last part of the ritual to get this party started!

A bargaining chip is "you only get X if I get Y" I'm saying "Here's X, can I have Y?" Is asking for the thing we summoned her for considered rude? Or should we politely wait until she proposes it?
>>
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>Arguing about the purpose of a sandwich
>>
>>1426904
It's refined autism,my friend.
>>
>>1426904
Quest has trapped us in this purgatory until we earn us some scissors, we've got a long time and a lot of shitposting to do
>>
>>1426904
Seems less about the purpose of it and more about the intention of what to do with it.
>>
Rolled 8 (1d10)

>>1426638
Attempted Smooth route

>8 Supports

>>1426658
Direct and Alpha route

>4 Supports

THE PATH IS CHOSEN


>A: "Uh...I-"
>You notice Muscles is frozen next to you
>He's taught
>Nearly pulling his own tendons but...
>He's not moving
>Not even inching for the booty
>Muscles is...
>Afraid?
>No. He's intimidated.
>By the sheer majesty of what may lie beneath the huge mound of fabric pushing out behind this extra-dimensional curve-queen
>Thank darkness for that
>You level your eyes at her, then back to the sandwich...

ROLL CHARISMA!

d20 + 1!
>>
Rolled 14 + 1 (1d20 + 1)

>>1426924
Rollan
>>
Rolled 20 + 1 (1d20 + 1)

>>1426924
SPAGHETTI INBOUND BRACE FOR IMPACT
>>
Rolled 2 + 1 (1d20 + 1)

>>1426924
>>
Rolled 5 + 1 (1d20 + 1)

>>1426924
I know your pain, Muscles.

I know your pain.
>>
Rolled 1 + 1 (1d20 + 1)

>>1426931
FOR SPAGHETTI!
>>
Rolled 7 + 1 (1d20 + 1)

>>1426924
ROLL WITH ALL MY MIGHT
>>
Rolled 17 + 1 (1d20 + 1)

>>1426924
>>
Rolled 2 + 1 (1d20 + 1)

>>1426924
>>
Rolled 5 + 1 (1d20 + 1)

RAVIOLI RAVIOLI DON'T DROP YOUR SPAGHETTIOLI
>>
Rolled 14 + 1 (1d20 + 1)

>>1426924
Thought I was the one tryin' to be a smooth guy.
>>
Rolled 16 + 1 (1d20 + 1)

>>1426924
>>
Rolled 8 + 1 (1d20 + 1)

>>1426924
oh goddammit
>>
Rolled 4 + 1 (1d20 + 1)

>>1426924
Because we always get shit rolls for the entertainment of the dice gods
>>
>>1426938
Cool
>>
Rolled 4 + 1 (1d20 + 1)

>>1426924
EMPRAAAAAH
>>
>>1426938
kys
>>
Rolled 2 + 1 (1d20 + 1)

>>1426938
We never get nice rolls
I mean sure, we'll get wins, but this happens so often.
>>
>>1426938
Well, see ya later Anon x Hekapoo route.
>>
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>>1426938
>>1426946
>>1426950
>>1426949
>>1426953
>>
Rolled 4 + 1 (1d20 + 1)

>>1426924
>>
Rolled 4 + 1 (1d20 + 1)

>>1426955
>>
Rolled 19 + 1 (1d20 + 1)

>>1426924
>d20 + 1
>>
Rolled 14 + 1 (1d20 + 1)

>>1426924
>>
File: 20170503_145442.jpg (305 KB, 750x1080)
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>>1426938
>Starfu path becomes clearer
PROGRESS
EVERY
SESSION
>>
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>>1426963
>not the brittney path
pffffffffft
>>
Rolled 14 + 1 (1d20 + 1)

>>1426924
>>
>>1426963
>Get to Starfu path
>Get one chance to flirt with Star
>Get multiple nat 1's with the final roll landing on a nat 1
>Starfu is destroyed forever
>>
>>1426938
>>1426938
WINNER!

>sort of

>3 total...

>>1426931
+2!


>5

>You gape too for a moment
>She snaps her fingers in your face
>H: "Well?"
>You present the sandwich as fast as you can, slapping your skull into the carpet
>Ow
>A: "I MADE THISFORYOU PLEASE DON'T ROAST ME I NEEDAWANDTOSAVEMY MOM!"
>H: "Wha-"
>A: "SHE'S A BOOK AND SHE'S REALLY NICE AND SHE MADE ME THIS ARMPLEASEINEEDYOURSCISSORS!"
>The silence that persists feels like it could crush you
>The sandwich lifts from your hand
>H: "I haven't had one of these since I was a sprite."
>Her face is listless, dreamy almost
>She cackles
>Her toes burn blackmarks into the floor
>H: "You must have one OLD summoning book, kid."
>She scarfs the sandwich in one gigantic bite
>The whole thing
>In her mouth
>At once
>You're visibly sweating
>H: "What's wrong?"
>She steps on your shoulder
>H: "You 'mirin?"
>A: "I-"
>She kicks you onto your back, stalking up with the exact same dreamy grin
>Her eyes however
>They spell murder
>With a wave of her hand spectral blades are summoned and cross together
>H: "My scissors aren't for people who ask, runt. They're for powerful beings that prove themselves worthy of traveling the cosmos."
>She points a pair of corporeal scissors into your nose
>H: "What makes you think you deserve some of this?"
>SUH-MACK!
>...
>She turns red
>The demon lady, who was fine with being on fire has turned bright cherry red
>Muscles comes out from behind her
>The smuggest looking hand you've ever seen
>Ever
>NowWeDie
>Muscles is certain it was worth it

WHAT DO?
>>
>>1426969
I'm pretty sure nat 1s are the only way you could actually get stuck with someone as awful as her.
>>
>>1426969
>winning roll is a nat 20
>offset by 10 nat 1s
>we spaghetti so hard we punch Star in the face
>>
>>1426973
LEG SWEEP
>>
>>1426973
"Bold enough for you?"
HOLD IN SPAGHETTI JESUS CHRIST
>>
>>1426973
"I created my arm. It has its own mind. Please don't kill me. Or my arm. It's attached to me."
>>
>>1426973
Finger guns.
>>
>>1426973
roll over and accept our fate

no, not really. Try to recover. Tell her you can prove yourself
>>
>>1426985
this
>>
>>1426973
>Awkward silence
>"a-a-a-I CAN EXPLAIN"
>>
>>1426973
>"Before you kill me, to be fair, I'd have to have some pretty powerful confidence to do that."
>>
>>1426987
>>1426985
These, we made our bed, now to sleep in it
>>
>>1426973
CONVINCE HEKAPOO THE ARM IS NOT OF OUR OWN CONTROL
>>
>>1426973
Tenias que hacerlo,musculos? DE VERDAD TENIAS QUE HACERLO?!
>>
>>1426973
>>1426985
this
>>
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>>1426973
>"W-Wh-Worthy e-en-enough f-for y-y-y-ou?"
>>
>>1426987
Gotta go with this. Even if it's going to backfire hilariously. Because it's going to backfire hilariously.
>>
>>1426987
also this
>>
>>1426984
Okay but seriously
>>1426985
This
>>
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>>1426973
>Mfw we die to a god after all the shit we've been through because of a disembodied hand
>>
>>1426985
>>1426987
>>1426999
Voting something around all of this.
>>
>>1426987
The only solution. LEAN INTO IT BOYS
>>
>>1426973
>>1426992
Screw that,
>>1426987
We doin' this.
>>
>>1426985
Fuck, if we're gonna autism all over the place, might as well pretend we're not as retarded as we really are.
>>
>>1426973
>"He's got a mind of his own, and he's attracted to Similarly powerful beings"
Basically put it all on charisma
>>
>>1426973
Tell her it literally has a mind of its own, beg for forgiveness

>"You 'mirin?"
MY DICK
>>
>>1426973
Give her the finger guns and lets Muscles follow through with another. We'll show the daemonic witch who's worthy.
>>
>>1426985
>>1426987
We dun goofed time to ride the nuke
>>
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>>1426985
>>1426998
>>1426995
>>1426999
>>1427006
>>1427007
>>1427008
>>1427009

>You did not make it through your first grade recital
>Your first dead goldfish
>You seventh ass whooping...
>and eating Janna's Marsh dogs to die from this
>You put on that same smile you always use when death is right in front of your face
>Because it is
>You put on your best Johnny Bravo and ask
>A: "H-hey ma'am um! Gurl! I mean Gurl. You a baker? Cause you sure got a lot of..."
>You swallow
>"Cake."
>You have been punched in the face
>A: "AAH!"
>H: "What kind of creepy little bastard are you!?"
>A: "AAH! I'M SORRY! My arm was my first creation! He's a got a mind of his own and he can't resist pillowy soft, oatmeal thick-"
>You have been punched in the same spot in your face
>A: "STOP THAT!"
>H: "STOP TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT!"
>THU-WACK!
>Muscles has hit her again
>Your room is now fire
>H: "RRRRRAAAAHHHHHH!!!!"
>A: "I AM SO SORRY!"
>H: "I'M GONNA GIVE YOU THE WORST CHALLENGE ANY MORTAL IN THIS! OR ANY OTHER REALM HAS EVER. RECEIVED!"
>She stamps into the cracking floorboards
>Your house loses all power
>The rain outside patters softly
>That's when the other portal appears

https://youtu.be/fzEHg8UYNjQ

>You see demons
>Swarms
>Lakes
>Oceans of burning bodies in a wasteland of twisted flesh and fire
>At it's core, you see a monolithic castle of red and ebony stone dominate the horizon
>All of them sway, slice and gnash into each other as unholy music pounds every alien eardrum into fleshy chunks
>Your mind begins to melt
>She appears within the portal, flying down into the castle
>She emerges, carrying with her a black swathed shape
>Flames lick at her heels as she rockets back to you
>Her eyes, even miles away sear into you
>She emerges in a cloud of twisted bat winged mouth monsters and splayed tentacles
>She lands softly, held up by a force that exudes from every pore of her being
>Muscles has returned to your side
>Somewhat satisfied
>More re-frightened back into placidness
>She places the bundle before you and then rips it off of her passenger
>Before you stands...
>A dude
>A dude with three eyes
>...and a set of horns sprouting form his skull
>H: "Creep. Meet Tom."
>T: "Hey."
>A: "H-hi-"
>T: "I'm the prince of hell and I'm gonna eat your soul and organs after you fail this test."
>Oh
>How swell


WHAT DO?
>>
>>1427030
What's the test?
>>
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>>1427030
Well, what's the challenge?
>Hekapoo route locked
>>
>>1427030
so if i win do i get to eat your soul and organs if i succeed?
>>
>>1427030
Pray. Ask what the challenge is.

Do you think we can win SOME sort of favor by mentioning Luna? Or are we beyond saving?
>>
Rolled 10 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1427030
...
S h i i e t.

maintain composure.
Try not to look at surroundings and panic.
Try not to panic about house burning down with fleshmom passed out inside it.
Try not to panic about dropping spaghetti in front of Hekapoo
Ask what the task involves.
>>
>>1427030
Failure is not an option.
>>
>>1427030
Aight. What do we gotta do?
>>
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>>1427030
> Daemons

MAMA AND THE EMPEROR ARE WITH US AND WE SHALL NOT FEAR
>>
>>1427030
>H: "I'M GONNA GIVE YOU THE WORST CHALLENGE ANY MORTAL IN THIS! OR ANY OTHER REALM HAS EVER. RECEIVED!"

GG guys.

>"I'll probably give you indigestion. What's the test?"
>>
>>1427030
Curse Star's name
>>
>>1427030
So what's the test? Also, let's make one more pass at Hekapoo.
>>
>>1427030
"Name's Anon. What's the challenge?"
>>
>>1427030
"hi I am anon, and if I win you give me a pair of sicssors and you fuck off"
>>
>>1427030
>>1427042
Also, do we have Luna's corpse with us, or did we leave it in our room with the fire?
>>
>>1427030
"Cool. So what's the test? I got a Mom to save."
>>
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>>1427030
Lets do this.

For Luna.
>>
>>1427030
We really need to talk to Muscles later, his wanton lust for booty is admirable but problematic

Also,
>In the last 4 days I've stared down pure death, been gangbanged by an insane bird and his army of monsters, and taken down a gigantic pier troll and its fat little handler. Bring it the fuck on
>>
>>1427060
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wGlBwW7f5HA
>>
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>>1427030
In this dark place, in this dark hour. We will face the enemies of our mother and they shall know, that even here on this desecrated, infernal rock, that we will not suffer the existence of the daemon. Not now. Not ever.

IN OUR MOTHER'S NAME
>>
>>1427060
>No. You don't understand. I've been dead for 14 years. Today is the day I live.
>>
>>1427030
Now that you've literally scared my arm back into control...


FULL WILL. WE'RE FEARLESS. TIME TO GAME FACE
>>
>>1427072
i've got the joy joy joy joy down in my heart...
>>
>>1427072
TIME TO GO FULL LISA
>>
>>1427077
>>1427078
Considering what we've been using to heal Anon and his mutation, we're damn near a Joy mutant already.

We're even fighting to bring back a girl that was taken away from us. Swapped ages, but still.

REMAIN STONE FACED ANON.
>>
>>1427030
>Your room is now fire

SAVE THE BOOK
>>
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>>1427036
>>1427037
>>1427039
>>1427041
>>1427042
>>1427043
>>1427044
>>1427045
>>1427046
>>1427047
>>1427048
>>1427050
>>1427051
>>1427052
>>1427057
>>1427058
>>1427060

>You're cursing some things right now
>Muscles
>Who has no ragrets
>Star Butterfly
>She might have Ragrets
>You don't know
>Her stupid royal parents could certainly afford some
>You curse your luck
>You curse your arm's lust for booty
>Once you're done, you regain your composure
>A single deep breath shifts you from the picture of pasta to an edifice of solidarity
>Heckapoo notices that
>It puts a slight pause to her smug, catlike smirk
>A: "What's the challenge?"
>Tom turns to Heckapoo
>T: "You can't be serious. I have things to do you kno-"
>H: "I outrank you. You can chase girls and write poetry later. Business time is now."
>Tom does a total 180
>From a laid back, nonchalant terror
>To just a fucking terror
>T: "MY FATHER SHOULD HAVE REAMED YOUR BRAINS FROM YOUR SKULL AND PUT YOUR BODY ON THE THRONE WHEN YOU WERE HIS SUCCUBUS!"
>Heckapoo?
>More like NotaHeckpoo
>Cause she doesn't give one
>Her finger flicks Tom in the ear
>Something about this tweaks him back to normal
>When he's not burning the air with his mouth he seems almost familiar
>Like a neglected, edgy teen
>Like you
>Weird
>H: "Creep. Since you're such a 'hotshot.' I've come up with a challenge worthy of your "Talents."
>A: "Anon."
>H: "Heckscuse me?"
>A: "My name's Anonymou-"
>H: "YOUR NAME IS BITCH! ...and I own you."
>She delfates a tad, looking satisfied with her reference
>H: *ahem* "ANON here will be trying to do what any Warlock worth is salt could. You're going to bind a demon."
>She points to Tom
>H: "This demon."
>Tom is very displeased
>Looks almost disgusted
>H: "Next to Lucicron himself. THE Demon."
>Muscles has put himself on your free shoulder
>Consolingly
>A: "Nice knowin' you too, yah lovable pseudo-rapist."
>You are Anon
>14 year old...Warlock?
>Maybe
>You've been tasked with binding the Prince of Hell to your will

What. Do?
>>
>>1427085
So who's our Buzzo?
And who's our Terry?
>>
>>1427088
well... shit, how do we bind a demon?

Maybe we can find something in the book real fast?
>>
>>1427088
F u g.
How do we ... how do we even do that?

I suppose we can Mindread on Tom and just ask him how to bind demons, hoping he thinks about how to be binded (or how to NOT be binded, at which point we do the opposite)
>>
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>>1427088
>begin polite conversation to distract him
>reach into his mind and assume direct control.
>>
>>1427088
I guess we have to do like how we do it with the dead,but with tom?
>>
>>1427090
>>1427092
That kinda gives me an idea. We could ask Tom to help us fake the binding, psychically. He's got more important things to do, after all. We can do him a favor in return.
>>
>>1427088
Oh shit, we're a Necromancer, and we have to bind someone to our will. Does that mean we have to kill Tom and resurrect him?
>>
>>1427088
OK then! Fuck it!

>"Alright then, Tom. How do I bind you to my will?"
>>
>>1427088
I say that after we bind this Daemon we purge it afterwards, surely nothing horrible will happen.
>>
>>1427096
this
>>
>>1427093
Wait, no, not this. Start trying to build a rapport with Tom about life and shit. Tell him your story and how shit life is. Don't drop any names of course, but try to get him to willingly bind himself through shared kinship or pity.
>>
>>1427102
Sounds good to me
>>
>>1427088
Eh... Ask Tom if he wants to deal with this. Maybe we can use his hate for Hekapoo to our favor.

Try reading his thoughts.

>>1427089
Buzzo is No one so far; Ludo's definitely a candidate if we keep his attention, but Toffee's a huge yes if he ever looks into us.

There hasn't been a joke character that turns into a complete badass after A LOT of effort yet.

Anon's father is Marty for sure.
>>
>>1427088
Would carving our name into his heart work? Fuck, I dunno about this one. Just try not to die and think our way through it. Reading his mind's a good start.
>>
read toms mind, possibly heckas is she won't notice it. we are gonna do this tactically
>>
>>1427088
See if we can read any thoughts to glean information. Tom seems like he's not that different from us, maybe we could try to appeal to that side of him?
>>
Offer him help with his girl troubles if he let's just bind him which will lead to Star and we offer help with that since we know her
Do this through mind reading so H-Poo doesn't hear us
>>
>>1427110
Have you not learn anything from the last two times we've tried to mind read something that wasn't human?
>>
>>1427107
Well, in Jewish folklore you need to know the Demon's true name, write it down, add the glyphs for "commanded by" (or somesuch) and then speak it aloud.
>>
>>1427096
>>1427101
>making a deal with the devil
yeh nah
>>
>>1427113
Let's do this, there is no hope for us anyway.
>>
>>1427088
Alright let's try to avoid fighting him for as long as possible. Try and have a conversation with him, telepathically so Hekapoo doesn't listen to us. Anon and Tom are both edgy teens that beat stuff up, right? Who knows how many other things we have in common.
And WE know that Tom has a crush on Star, and if Anon were to learn that he could certainly use that information as some kind of leverage. Maybe offer to let Tom meet up with Star later? Star still wants to meet with Anon, so we could trick her pretty easily.
>>
>>1427105
Maybe try telling Tom if it wasn't for our dickhead of an arm none of this'd be happening. Win sympothy points.

Oh, and APOLOGIZE TO HEKAPOO AFTER THIS. Seriously, we DO NOT want her to stay as an enemy. Try to convince her we went full retard in the beginning, and our arm is a fucking twat.
>>
>>1427088
Try and fill are head with white noise, that way we can not let anyone read are mind
>>
>>1427115
*A Daemon
ftfy
>>
>>1427102
Honestly probably this, valiant strength of arms will earn us a glorious death. Using our brain and wits might buy us another day of sweet, sweet life.
>>
>>1427120
fill our heads by thinking about iowa, its so bland and boring they would not be able to hear us do to it
>>
>>1427088
>Consult THE BOOK.
>Appeal to Tom's edge.
>Ask about binding:
>Read minds.
>>
>>1427125
Imma take a nap, you guys can handle this session of the quest while I rest right?
>>
>>1427126
Appeal to Tom's edge, while trying to get into his head
>>
>>1427088
Use Muscles to wrap around Tom's throat and choke slam.
Ask him to bind himself to us.
If he says no.
Repeat until he does.
>>
>>1427134
Stop trying to fucking kick the bear to make it go away!
>>
>>1427134
>Fight a demon prince
>One that has more experience than we will ever have

Yeah, sounds like a good idea.
>>
>>1427134
You're a loony.
>>
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>>1427134
>I want to grapple the demon prince capable of immolating himself
'No'
>>
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>>1427089
>>1427090
>>1427092
>>1427093
>>1427097
>>1427099
>>1427105
>>1427107
>>1427110

>You flex your biggest muscle
>Your di- brain.
>It's your brain, kid
>Sorry
>The mind you feel in front of you is a white hot ball of hate wrapped in a shell of steel spikes
>Gotta try something

>A: "Hey. Can you hear this?"
>T: "Telepathy? Huh. I thought humans weren't supposed to have that yet."
>A: "I don't think we are, dude."
>T: "Trying to keep this private? That's clever. Still gonna destroy you."
>A: "Couldn't you maybe...throw one in?"
>T: " https://youtu.be/fRamB30E9mU "
>T: "No."
>A: "How do I even do this!?"
>T: "I thought you were a warlock?"
>A: "I'm Anonymous. Anonymous McMoot."
>T: "That's your name?"
>A: "Yes."
>T: "Dang. Didn't think I'd be doing a mercy killing today."
>A: "Dude, cmon it don't gotta go down like this."
>T: "Fraid so. You gotta come up with a competition between us. Then beat me in it."
>A: "Don't you have shit to do? This'll be faster if you-"
>T: "If I scoop out your eyes with my fingers and squish the jelly onto a cracker? Yeah. I agree."
>A: "Look. I never asked for this."
>T: "Adam Jensen didn't ask for it either."
>A: "You don't mean the guy from Deus Ex do you?"
>T: "Did you?"
>A: "M-maybe..."
>T:" Doesn't matter. He's in hell too, and you summoned the scissor whore."
>A: "Well I wasn't trying to get her to bring you here! My stupid sex-crazed flesh beast of an arm kept spankin' her and it pissed her off!"
>T: "You...hit her?"
>A: "On the ass."
>T: "You hit Heckapoo?"
>A: "Right on the ass, sir."
>T: "Hit her."
>A: "The whole ass."
>T: "Hm..."


>T: "Ok look."
>Tom says, back in the real world.
>T: "I'm not feeling the whole burn your world down and snort the ashes off of your butt-bones thing today."
>H: "You can't be serious."
>T: "So, kid. What do 'you' think you could beat me at?"
>A: "Uh..."
>T: "Because whatever it is."
>He leans forward.
>Close enough to smell brimstone on his breath.
>T: "You can't."

>Tom has let you choose the method of contest

WHAT CHOOSE YOU, ANON!?
>>
>>1427142
Arm wrestling. Tom has nogainz
>>
>>1427142
Nigga are you serious?

S H I T P O S T I N G.
>>
>>1427142
WE DO WHAT WE GOOD AT BITCH

PLAY VIDYA

Or the saxophone
>>
>>1427142
Who can piss off Hekapoo the most?
>>
>>1427142
>We will challenge him to a shitposting contest

We've been preparing for this moment for years lads
>>
>>1427142
Saxophone off is a go
>>
>>1427142
SAX OFF

NOW

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K6RUg-NkjY4
>>
>>1427148
this
or who has the most knowledge of iowa
>>
>>1427142
>Anger Self-Management Contest
>>
>>1427142
SAX OFF! It's the one fucking thing we're good at!
>>
>>1427145
>>1427142
Changing from this to Shitposting contest with Sax playing if he doesn't go for that
>>
>>1427155
or this
>>
>>1427142
either a videogame OR a sax off
>>
WAIT

If we do Saxophone off, who decides the winner? We may get someone biased for Tom.
>>
>>1427166
Like I said, the ONE thing we're good at.
>>
>>1427166
Don't blame me, I voted for shitposting.
>>
>>1427158
I wanna switch to this. Whoever doesn't lose their temper first wins.
>>
>>1427158
The condition is: We have to watch Anon's memories; first one the get pissy loses.

The idea is we get him pissed at the Star-And-Marco-In-The-Bathroom part.
>>
>>1427166
WAIT! Let's challenge him to a contest of anger management! First one to lose their cool wins!
>>
>>1427142
A single game of Warhammer 40k tabletop.
>>
>>1427166
It doens't matter how bad we are as long as Tom is worse.
>>
>>1427142
Who can hold their temper the longest, Hekapoo gets to annoy us equally to see who flips first.

Bonus points as HEkapoo gets to annoy tom For legit reasons
>>
>>1427158
this
>>
>Not so. I said you're quite good for your age.
SAX OFF! Our best hope!
>>
>>1427142
Anger Self-Management Contest sounds good.
Shitpost too
>>
>>1427179
This. If there's one thing we have, it's will.
>>
>>1427142
Anger Self-Management Contest
>>
Guys, anger management is a terrible subject for us. At the mention of our dead Mommy we freak.
>>
>>1427190
Its better than saxophone.
>>
>>1427190
Nah, that was just righteous fury for seeing Ludo shred the book.
>>
>>1427190
True, but this be a test of will, our strongest stat.

It's one of our better options, next to vidya and saxophone.
>>
>>1427192
Not really, we're actually good at the sax. And the anger management thing is a guaranteed loss for us.
>>
>>1427158
Changing to this. We have the will to choke down our emotions. We just have to make it to Star and Marco in the bathroom together and Tom will freak out.
>>
>>1427142
Sax battle
>>
>>1427197
we are mediocre QM told us in discord
>>
>>1427190
Pffft, eeasyy.

We just gotta show our memory of Marco and Star in the boy's bathroom before that.
>>
>>1427197
do you think Muscles is any good at the sax?
Just ask yourself, does it have a butt?
>>
>>1427158
Changing to this, it's our best shot. Tom can't cheat at this.
>>
>>1427200
>>1427200

Clarification.
What I said specifically was "Anon is quite good for his age. Since when he had the Sax he played it every single day."

He was good enough to play this song.

https://youtu.be/00pdeazHXtw
>>
>>1427205
YES
ANON IS MY NIGGA.
>>
>>1427205
>>1427205
I am allowing another five minutes for voting and discourse. Then. It will be time...to count.
>>
If you are going to change your vote remember to delete the original one.
>>
>>1427210
>>1427147

Change to anger management.

Determining who wins at saxophone is too tricky; who can say who's better?
>>
>>1427205
If Anon is good enough to play that, then he might just have a chance to win. I vote for the Sax-Off.
>>
>>1427158
THIS.

Basically "who loses their cool the first?"
>>
>>1427214
>who can say who's better?

Hekapoo. She's judge
>>
>>1427217
Except it's VERY OBVIOUS she might hate Anon more than Tom

She might pick Tom just because "fuck you, can't judge quality :^) "
>>
>>1427217
Won't she try insta-failing us for smacking her on her bum?
>>
>>1427216
Although I should mention that by the end of this, Tom will probably hate us.
>>
>>1427221
>>1427220
Tom practically just called her a whore and that her dad should had raped her skull dead.
>>
IT IS TIME
TO COUNT THE VOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-
>>
>>1427222
Hm, also true. I can see Anon and Tom getting along over vidya maybe. Doing this will soil good ally opportunities.
>>
>>1427195
>>1427214
>>1427222
So what about video games, then? I think that's something Tom has the least experience in.
>>
>>1427227
>Makes a Deus Ex reference
>Is shown to play video games
>Least experience
>>
>>1427227
Dude, he's played video games. I remember distinctly in the episode where Marco got the Nay-sayer he was casually playing games.
>>
>>1427227
He crushed Marco on ping pong using telekinesis.
He can murder us at Vidya.
>>
>>1427223
Big difference between talking smack and actually smacking

>>1427227
He knows Dues Ex, he might be just as avid of a gaymer as Anon, if not more because of extra time or some shit.

Tricky decisions here.
>>
>>1427222
Why would Tom be mad at us? The both of us lost our (one way or another) best friend to someone else. if anything, this'll give us a chance to bond.
>>
>>1427233
We could try to patch things up afterward.
>>
>>1427233
He'd be mad at us for making him angry and losing the competition, I mean.

We could play vidya with him some time in the future after he calmed down to build up relations.
>>
>>1427236
I say we have them watch through Anon's memories like a movie or something. That way, after Tom loses, he can have a chance at bonding with Anon through watching the rest of his memories.

>inb4 Tom Route Unlocked
>>
>>1427224
PANIC
>>
>>1427229
>>1427231
>>1427232
Hm, fair points. I haven't looked much into the series so I figured that was just something he picked up.

>>1427238
>>1427237
So hold mental conversation with Tom that this is both for the competition and so we learn more about each other? First one to lose their anger loses?
>>
Still think SAX OFF is best.
>>
>>1427237
What vidya would Anon play with Tom to bond?

I vote Crash Team Racing. You can never have a bad time with Crash Team Racing.
>>
>>1427237
>>1427243
We could always play some Battletoads together.
>>
>>1427244
nah, just play some Mario Party
>>
>>1427158
>>1427172
>>1427181
>>1427198
>>1427204
>>1427216

>Your perceptions have been at their peak during this whole exchange
>You're a loser
>Like
>The biggest loser with dark magic that ever lived
>You've had to eat shit at home
>At school
>In your own threads on 3senpai
>Still, you know you can do one thing
>Control yourself
>You dragged your own sorry carcass out of more jams than probably anyone else that has a waifu and wanted a body pillow
>N-not that you want one that badly
>They just look soft and comfy, is all
>You formulate a plan
>This guy has blown up within the first few seconds of being out of his Tendy Cave
>He's a REEE-er
>No doubt
>You think you've got it
>A: "You mad?"
>T: "A little."
>A: "Buttbumper-whumpered?"
>T: "What in the pit are you saying to me?"
>A: "Ass MAshed!?"
>Tom grows snakes for arms and makes your nose hairs go grey with his voice.
>T: "STOP TALKING LIKE THAT!"
>Fucking confirmed
>A: "I challenge you!"
>You poke Tom in his hooked, demon nose
>A: "To a special contest! The rules are simple! You rage...You ruse!"
>T: "I ru-"
>A: "Lose! Sorry. Sorry I just- Man the Japanese alphabet doesn't have an 'L' in it and I-"
>Heckapoo butts in
>H: "Very well."
>A: "Really?"
>T: "You gotta be kidding me."
>H: "You may each take turns attempting to enrage the other. The first one to lose their temper shall be supplicant to the other's whims."
>Heckapoo snaps her fingers
>You're teleported to an area
>In the base of a T.V. Studio set.
>The walls are yellow
>The floor is yellow
>Everything is the most god awful shade of yellow
>H: "Let's play, boys."
>An unseen crowd fills your ears with canned applause
>Background music starts to play

https://youtu.be/3yUFx622toA

>H: "Tom. You're the one who's been challenged. You go first."
>Tom glares into your soul.
>T: "Heh. Easy!"
>He grabs his throat, contorting the adam's apple with a toenail blackening crunch
>When he speaks
>It's in your mother's voice
>T: "Honey, don't cry. It wasn't that hard. Sweetie you need to grow up about this. He only did it because you were misbehaving. If you just behaved he wouldn't have to do it. SHUT UP! SHUT UP, ANON YOU LITTLE BRAT! THIS WAS NOTHING COMPARED TO HOW HE HITS ME! NOTHING!"

>Your stomach drops
>You remember this
>Far too well
>Christmas


ROLL WILL!

1d20 + 6!
>>
>>1427243
Nah, Kirby Air Ride city mode is what we should do if we want a good time.
>>
Rolled 15 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1427246
WITNESS ME
>>
Rolled 5 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1427246
>>
Rolled 17 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1427246
rollan
>>
Rolled 20 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1427246
>>
Rolled 17 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1427252
>trying to out will us
pfffffffft
>>
Rolled 11 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1427246
NUESTRA VOLUNTAD ES INAMOVIBLE
>>
Rolled 2 (1d10)

>>1427246
>>1427246
>>1427246
the d10!

Oh and

>>1427224
>>1427224
>>1427224

-OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooootes!
>>
Rolled 6 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1427246
IT'S GONNA GET WEIRD
>>
Rolled 13 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1427246
That's dirty and alow blow. Of course it takes a demon to cheat their way to a win. But hey whatever makes you feel better about yourself.
>>
Rolled 15 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1427246
>>
STOP ROLLING
>>
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Rolled 14 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1427246
Up and at 'em lads
>>
WE ALREADY HAVE A GREAT NUMBR STOP ROLLIN
>>
STOP. ROLLING.
>>
>>1427252
YEAH BOYHJ!

>>1427247
Ooh, good choice. Loved that game.
>>
I know what we should stay to tom "if that's the best you got I now know why star left you"
>>
>>1427256
When it's our turn, I suggest we just let him go again, saying something like "Is that it?"

>>1427265
We don't know Star left him. Or that they've even met.
>>
>>1427246
Object to this disparity between knowledge granted to the contestants.
>>
So how does Tom know about our memories? Demon psycho-powers? Do we know his? If so, it'll be really easy to just bring up Star.
>>
>>1427265
Good choice, but problem mate: Anon knows nothing of Tom's relation with Star.

Not yet, anyway.
>>
>>1427265
Anon doesn't even know Tom knows Star, you nig nog.

We have to see into his memories first.
>>
>>1427266
Yes we do. We are Kek Gods. We can tell Anon the info.
>>
>>1427266
>what is memory sifting
>>
>>1427272
Something else don't have access to?
>>
>>1427273
>what is mind reading
>>
>>1427252
>>1427252
>>1427252
>>1427252
WINNER!

> 23 total


Also, don't listen to the naysayers if you don't want to, lurkers

If you want to roll, roll.
After all, you might get a 20 and help out


>Your fist clenches
>Your eyes turn to steel
>Your soul however...
>It is the rock in the storm
>You don't even blink
>Not even a twitch
>Once again, Heckapoo takes note
>A: "That all you got?"
>T: "Not even close."
>Shit
>He's probably telling the truth

>CHOOSE!

>Mind read Tom to get effective Ammo
>Will 1d20 + 6

>Charisma your way into wordplay that will upset him
1d20 + 1

>Other
>>
Rolled 14 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1427275
Rottin in grave
>>
Rolled 12 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1427275
MIND READ TOM
>>
>>1427275
Mind read, we will break this little imp.
>>
Rolled 16 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1427275
Mind read for effective ammo!
>>
Rolled 11 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1427275
will everytime nigga
>>
Rolled 20 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1427275
We have better stats in mind reading. Do so.
>>
Rolled 10 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1427275
MIND READ
>>
Rolled 1 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1427275
>Pick 1d20+6 to fuck him up
>Or risk fucking ourselves with 1d20+1

Yeah nah m8, read his zoggin' mind
>>
Rolled 8 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1427275
Gimme that juicy Star salt.
>>
Rolled 20 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

Please don't fuck up
Please don't fuck up
Please don't fuck up
>>
Rolled 1 + 1 (1d20 + 1)

>>1427275
Here goes nothing.
>>
>>1427271
Being extra-dimensional entities who guide Anon and being acknowledged as such is a wonderful thing.
>>
Rolled 18 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1427275
>>
>>1427283
NO

>>1427283
NOOOOOOO
>>
Rolled 5 + 1 (1d20 + 1)

>>1427275
Roll those d10s please.
>>
Rolled 5 (1d10)

>>1427275
>>1427275
>>1427275
THE D10!
I AM SO SMALL FROM EXCITEMENT!
>>
Rolled 20 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1427275
>>1427275
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA Y LMAO Y LMAO Y LMAO Y LMAO Y LMAO

le epic so ebin dae le epin win xĐ pwn’d ftw le bacon narwhale xP

tfw no gf xĐ ayy lmao! :p

upboated good sir i tip my fedora to you, fine gentlemen le real men have class xĐ real human bean!!1 dae cake is a lie lel epic fail!!!!!!!! ;p for YOU!! :ĐĐĐ XĐ we r anonymous >:Đ lol ĐOGE111 so ebin much le1, for the lulz!! xĐ le upvote for you :) just epic, simply epin ROFLMAOCOPTER BBQ :o WE ESPORTS NOW :ĐĐĐĐĐĐĐĐĐ, did u waifu?

le dae EXPLOĐIN KNEES PUĐĐI!!!! le epic oldfag here, ama :Đ, 5get or faget? keke ebin… SHOOP LE WHOOP :Đ XĐĐĐĐĐ, here have an upboat, lelele so much ebin 420 smoke weed!!!!!11 dae le trees? :Đ le tree blaze ftw! epic memes, us gamers huh!? >:) tips fedora, le any1 athiest? SJW EBIN WOW memez? RAISE UR ĐONGERS! 8Đ YTMĐ :))))))))

EPIC PWNAGE!………… CUPCAKES (im so randum :) dae la lets players!!! BROFIST :dd dae feel ? le sad frog faec. IM CIA, dae BANE!? PRO TIP: FOR YOU XĐddd!!!11 le dubs goy! hehehehada dh…. twitch general /twitch/ @:=] kappa :Đ

le maymay arrow is this a le new epic meme? screen kapped for dat sweet karma xĐ. FUS ROH ĐAH!!!!!1 i used to be a christmas but then i took an arrow 2 da knee : BAZINGA BAZINGA ZIMBABWE. top kek, toppest of keks. le nyan cat? hahahaha le mayonaise. fucking epic ass meme i love that fucking meme so much man wait let me just gets crack pipe out smoke some of that good 420 shit : rips a bong AHHHHHHHHH YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

that sure hit the spot ok now repeat that fucking epic ass M E M E


tfw no gf xD ayy lmao! :p

upboated good sir i tip my fedora to you, fine gentlemen le real men have class xD real human bean!!1 dae cake is a lie lel epic fail!!!!!!!! ;p for YOU!! :DDD XD we r anonymous >:D lol DOGE111 so ebin much le1, for the lulz!! xD le upvote for you :) just epic, simply epin ROFLMAOCOPTER BBQ :o WE ESPORTS NOW :DDDDDDDDD, did u waifu?

le dae EXPLODIN KNEES PUDDI!!!! le epic oldfag here, ama :D, 5get or faget? keke ebin… SHOOP LE WHOOP :D XDDDDD, here have an upboat, lelele so much ebin 420 smoke weed!!!!!11 dae le trees? :D le tree blaze ftw! epic memes, us gamers huh!? >:) tips fedora, le any1 athiest? SJW EBIN WOW memez? RAISE UR DONGERS! 8D YTMD :))))))))

EPIC PWNAGE!………… CUPCAKES (im so randum :) dae la lets players!!! BROFIST :dd dae feel ? le sad frog faec. IM CIA, dae BANE!? PRO TIP: FOR YOU XDddd!!!11 le dubs goy! hehehehada dh…. twitch general /twitch/ @:=] kappa :D

le maymay arrow is this a le new epic meme? screen kapped for dat sweet karma xD. FUS ROH DAH!!!!!1 i used to be a christmas but then i took an arrow 2 da knee : BAZINGA BAZINGA ZIMBABWE. top kek, toppest of keks. le nyan cat? hahahaha le mayonaise. fucking epic ass meme i love that fucking meme so much man wait let me just gets crack pipe out smoke some of that good 420 shit : rips a bong AHHHHHHHHH YES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

that sure hit the spot ok now repeat that fucking epic ass M E M E
>>
>>1427291
Aaaand thats a crit success
>>
Rolled 15 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1427275
Rolling will for mind read

Or we could try spoiling the end of a game for him
>>
>>1427285
HE WON!

THANK GOD
>>
>>1427285
Boo fuckin hells yes.
>>
>>1427281
>>1427285
>>1427293
Ayo hol up
Is that
26
+2
+2
=30
>>
File: 9ae.gif (1.03 MB, 250x188)
1.03 MB
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>>1427293
>>1427285
OOOOOOH
OOOOOOOOOOOH
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH
>>
>>1427293
OVERKILL
>>
>>1427285
Can't wait until we get into that head of his, nice job Anon.
>>
>>1427299
nah, we got two -2s.
still, 26
>>
>>1427299
...But -2 and -2.
>>
>>1427303
>>1427304
Nope, one of the minuses went to to a Char roll. Doesn't count.
>>
>>1427305
This.

I fucked up. But I fucked up on the right roll.
>>
>>1427285
Welp, mind-reading it is.
>>
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>POST YFW WE MIND RAPE TOM
>>
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>>1427285
SUCH IS THE FATE OF DAEMONS AND HERETICS
>>
>>1427306
>namefag
>fucking up
What a surprise.
>>
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>>1427308
>>
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>>1427308
>>
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>>1427308
>>1427308
>>
>>1427275
When the demon finished, Anon said "Well you're pretty good ol' son, but if you'll sit down on that chair, right there, and lemme show you how it's done!"
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K6RUg-NkjY4

>>1427285
FIRE IN THE MOUNTAIN, RUN BOYS, RUN
>>
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>>1427308
>>
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>Wha-
>What the hell is this you're putting in my head?
>>
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>>1427308
>>
You know, even with Heckapoo right there, maybe it isn't the best idea to be so close to a soon to be very angry demon prince. Also quite sad in Muscles, we raised you better!
>>
>>1427318
>Also quite sad in Muscles, we raised you better!
But Muscles always thinks with his Muscles.
>>
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>>1427308
>>
>>1427318
I still suggest immediately apologizing to Hekapoo when we can. Try to emphasize that we had no choice ONCE SO EVER in what our arm did.

We may yet still need her help.
>>
>>1427318
>Let him slap Whomst've ever he wanted without talking to him afterwards
>Raised him better

No, we earned this ''''punishment''''
>>
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>>1427308
>>
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>>1427308
>>
>>1427321
This, I don't want her to be forever mad at us
>>
>>1427323
We still mean to apologize to Ferg and I want to get a moment after, no matter the end result to say sorry to Heckapoo too.
>>
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>>1427308
>>
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>>1427308
>>
>>1427308
>>
>>1427285
>>1427285
>>1427285
>>1427285

Winner...

Our first. Natural 20.
It negates all nat 1s.
It is a critical...success

The ultimate.
Fucking.
VICTORY!

https://youtu.be/wUnfFC7wUrs

>When you look into this fucker's mind
>Not only do you see a mountain of edgy blog posts
>A stuffed bear
>His retainer
>His bedwetting
>He pisses lava but still
>BEDWETTING!
>He can feel what you're seeing
>His eyes shoot open
>T: "H-hey wait, no!"
>OH NO.
>OH HAYLLLL NAW!
>Everything
>Spilling his lunch all over his first crush
>Saying "You too" the first time that same crush said she liked him
>You see the look on her face
>That beaming
>Stupid
>Blonde...

>A: "..."
>You smirk
>A: "I don't think you got any room to talk shit, Tom. I may be a domestic abuse sufferin'. Tendy lovin. Shitpostin little basement dweller..."
>You approach
>Looming above this once imposing prince of the pit
>His ear is practically in your mouth when you whisper
>A: "At least my bitch didn't dump me to hang with a lame-ass. Safety lovin'-ass. Karate kid wanna be lookin-ass traitor with a SEATBELT FOR HIS TOILET! WHAT'DYA THINK A THAT YOU LINKIN PARK ALBUM ART TRACIN. CUTTIN' DOWN THE ROAD NOT ACROSS THE STREET ATTENTION SEEKIN'. TEMPER TANTRUM RUINING YOUR OWN BIRTHDAY PARTY HAVIN' NO LIFE NO FRIENDS NOT EVEN AN XBOX CLAN JOININ'. QUINTUPPLE DAEMON KEK! YOU'RE NOT EVEN GOOD ENOUGH FOR STAR BUTTERFLY!"

>He's already going to blow
>You could walk away now...
>You don't
>Instead you go wide eyed, stay in his face
>A: "...I bet you've never even seen a dog on a horse before."
>T: "...."
>A: "Because you suck."
>T: "..."
>A: "Nigga."


>T: " https://youtu.be/LhqUk28OwHs
https://youtu.be/oghBXKHWcyw
https://youtu.be/e8jKZrLfpg8
https://youtu.be/vc9U79LvNdE


> https://youtu.be/v-Su1YXQYek
https://youtu.be/v-Su1YXQYek
https://youtu.be/v-Su1YXQYek

>T: "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRGGH!"

>Tom doesn't get mad
>Tom isn't mad
>Tom am become
>Mad
>Destroyer of every fucking world
>He goes for your face with no hesitation
>The set around you both is disintegrating into pure ash
>The only reason you're not a crisp is because he wants the joy of ripping you to pieces
>You know it


WHAT DO!?
>>
>>1427324
_ ____ __ ___ ______ ____ _________!
>>
Rolled 13 + 8 (1d20 + 8)

>>1427336
Yo Muscles.
Dat ass.
>>
Punch right in the face full force and yell for Hekapoo to end this
>>
Rolled 9 + 8 (1d20 + 8)

>>1427336
MUSCLES WIP THIS LIL BITCH INTO SHAPE
>>
>>1427336
LAUGH! LAUGH FOR I HAVE ALREADY WON!
>>
>>1427336
"I told you you son of a bitch, I'm the best there's ever been."
Muscles, it's time to come out and play.
>>
>>1427336
>Smugly grin like a cat to the knife.
>>
>>1427339
This, we need to finish mind-breaking Tom.
>>
>>1427336
BIND HIM to your will

Maybe with something like "Tom, you are hereby bound to my will. Your first command is... don't hurt me ever."
>>
>>1427339
this
>>
>>1427336
He's bound to us now, right? Command him to not attack us.
>>
>>1427348
also this
>>
Rolled 20 + 8 (1d20 + 8)

>>1427336
There is only one response, only one thing we can do and it all comes back around.
>>1427339
>>
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>>1427336
Smile. And laugh.

Your will's indomitable.

Tell him he lost.
>>
>>1427354
This then>>1427348
>>
>>1427354
Fiddle sticks I forgot about no rolls until called now I feel a fool.

>>1427348
This seems fairly important as well.
>>
>>1427336
BIND
WILL
>>
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>>1427336
DAEMONSPAWN, BE STILL I COMMAND IT

Appeal to Heka with arms outstretched: "ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED"
>>
>>1427336
HE'S LOST

BIND WILL
>>
>>1427336
BIND HIM
>>
>>1427336
Bind will!
>>
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WHAT DO YA THINK A THAT, MR. MEWGGAR LOVIN
>>
>>1427359
I vote we scream this instead

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=na4GYyJwYjQ
>>
>>1427367
YES!
>>
>>1427365
BED WETTIN
>>
>>1427367
YES THIS OH GOD YES
>>
oh, and don't forget to smirk
>>
>>1427336
Before you end the session, could you please tell us why Star didn't answer the phone? I want to know if I won my bet.
>>
>>1427374
voting for this
>>
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>>1427336
>>1427346
>mfw
>>
>>1427362
>>1427361
>>1427360
>>1427359
>>1427358
>>1427355
>>1427354
>>1427348
>>1427352
>>1427346
>>1427343

>You slap him
>Mid leap
>You just slap him
>He's frozen in mid air
>A: "How did I-"
>Slow claps fill the arena
>Which dissolves around you
>You're back home
>In your extremely burnt room
>H: "Wow. Like...wow, kid. I'm impressed."
>Heckapoo floats down from her portal, looking much less incensed.
>A: "Why is he floating?"
>H: "He's bound to you now. Coudn't hurt you if he tried. You just basically pimp slapped him into stasis."
>A: "Can I-"
>H: "No, that's gay and more importantly lewd and even more importantly kind of rape."
>A: "NO! What!? Not that! Whatever that is...I wanna gloat."
>H: "Oh."
>A: "..."
>H: "By all means."
>You snatch your phone
>Searching up the first song on your victory playlist
>You put the speaker right in Tom's frozen face

https://youtu.be/hod0WtYE4SA

CONT
>>
>>1427379

>You fall backward
>Muscles catches you
>He fans your face with his hand
>You're so hot right now
>Too hot
>You foxtrot around Tom
>Running man
>Robot
>Muscles helps you both do the worm so hard you accidentally kick your ceiling fan
>H: "Ok."
>Moonwalk
>H: "OK!"
>You do the thumb trick where you make it look like you pulled your finger off.
>H: "Whoah, hey that's pretty good-"
>Right as you start to dote-see-doe Heckapoo picks you up by your Jacket
>H: "Enough."
>She opens a new portal and tosses Tom back to the depths of hell.
>A: "Hey! That's my human property!"
>H: "Kid, a binding can only last for so long. You can't keep a demon that powerful bound for any length of time. Yah won. You're the top dog -for now- but if you kept him here he'd turn your city into a black stain."
>A: "O-ok...so I get my scissors?"
>Honk
>H: "..."
>A: "Muscles...oh Muscles, no."
>Muscles YES!

>NEW TRAIT UNLOCKED

>ASS
>TITTIES
>ASS -AAAANNND- TITTIES!

>H: "Get hekt."
>Muscles gets prodded with one of Heckapoo's arm spines
>He becomes paralyzed immediately
>OW
>Ow it's like your soul has gone to sleep from the shoulder down
>H: "There."
>A: "Ah. Ah geeze, lady I'm still sorry about all the...molestation."
>H: "Eh. I've had worse."
>A: "Really?"
>H: "No."
>You're thrown into the portal
>You land with a whump on cold, stone tiles
>Around are fires, pillars and cranks and wheels
>H: "Well, Deedee."
>Heckapoo sighs
>H: "Welcome to my laboratory."
>A: "Why are we here?"
>H: "Here is where I'm gonna make your scissors."
>She bends down
>H: "...and you're gonna watch."
>Oh, antichrist your dick is trying to take over your whole body
>H: "You're gonna watch and learn how things work out here in the big. Bad. Multiverse."

>You are Anon
>14 year old Will-o-Mancer-Lock-fist
>You're gonna get your scissors
>You might also get fucking destroyed
>Not bad

SESSION END!

FOLLOW THE TWITTER FOR THE ART POSTED IN THREAD!

https://twitter.com/StarVsQuest

JOIN THE DISCORD TO WATCH HECKAPOO FORGE SCISSORS FROM SHITPOSTS!

https://discord.gg/x25nASh

ANNOUNCEMENT POST INCOMING
>>
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>>1427379
>>1427381
WE BALLERS NOW, BOYS!

And thank Hekapoo for understanding that our arm's a piece of shit, and for paralyzing it. Relieved to see we worked out an understanding.

So did we actually get a new trait? Or did we just cross off "feel a goddess' tittes and ass" off our bucket list?
>>
>>1427381

ANNOUNCEMENT

Every pair of scissors is different, Anons
Designed to reflect the earner's personality and abilities

WE WILL HAVE A CONTEST

It doesn't matter how good you are at drawing
MS Paint doodles
Napkin Doodles
I will accept anything
Even Minecraft Screenshots

DESIGN ANON'S SCISSORS

We'll have this contest over the next couple of sessions

After I collect the pictures, which need to be posted in thread to be official I shall put them up for a vote!

NEXT SESSION IS TOMORROW AT 7:00 PM U.S. CENTRAL TIME!

Bring your popcorn! It's gonna get educational!
>>
>>1427384
Thanks for running the game for us, Quest. Having a hellova time.
>>
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>>1427381
Anon's done us proud today. Good show lads.
>>
>>1427384
Thanks for running Quest! It was a wild ride of emotions and wrecking demons! This is probably the most fun quest I've read in a long while, you've got a way with writing in the emotion.
>>
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>>1427384
Can you tell us who won the bet tomorrow? Please?
>>
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Oh right. Thread archived, remember to vote.
>>
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>>1427384
Not a design really but we should start with something heavy and industrial to represent Anon's unbreakable will.
>>
>>1427384
>>1427538
I was thinking the exact same thing, but with a steel cutting scissor instead of a normal one.
>>
>>1427384
>>
>>1427384
>>
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>>1427384
Here's a crap design I made.
>>
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>>1427384
We could go with Kill la Kill scissors.
>>
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>>1427613
Scissors in action
>>
>>1427593
Beautiful and flame-y!
>>
>>1427613
>>1427616
So she just pulls out a bigger pair of scissors to deal with any threat? Seems pretty lame tbqh
>>
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>>1427384
Here's my shitty attempt at the scissors.
>>
>>1427943
I like it!
>>
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Next entry for the scissors. Pls bully as hard as you can.
>>
>>1427992
Best one yet.
>>
Rolled 1 (1d20)

dice
>>
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>>
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>>
>>1427992
This one!
>>
>>1427739
Nah, that's just one of their abilities they revealed in the ova episode. The full capabilities are at

http://kill-la-kill.wikia.com/wiki/Scissor_Blades
>>
Roll for the chance Anon is going to get some of that Thiccaboo tail!
>>
>>1427384
>>1427739
I mean really though it doesn't even have to be scissors.

Form-wise, it could be a
>knife (e.g. combat, butcher's, chef's, santoku, pocket, exacto, swiss army, envelope)
>sword (e.g. backsword, longsword/claymore, cutlass, katana, tachi, kodachi, scintar, machete)
>axe
>spear/javelin
>tiger claws
>chainsaw [actually canon]
>shredder
>can opener
>lawnmower

Anything that's remotely sharp could be it.
>>
>>1428391
It could also be a more improvised weapon.

E.g. a knife made out of bone, which would be appropriate given anon's powers.
>>
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So I gave the scissor thing a little try. I thought keeping them simple would be better, but I also thought adding a little moon design/motiff would be cool, I didn't get much out of that, though. I have now contributed my autism to this quest.

PS, we should totally get a scissor holster, like the ones that go under your armpit.
>>
>>1428410
I like this design, its simple and elegant, and also quite assymetrical.
>>
>>1428410
make the blade THICCCER and I'm down for this
>>
>>1428410
Mind if I borrow this?
>>
>>1428474
Go right ahead. I was hoping an Anon would do some color and inking on it for me, honestly.
>>
SESSION START

>You are Anon
>14 year old dude-man with growing magical power
>You're currently in the home of an interdimensional demon goddess
>She's been silent since bringing you here
>Probably doesn't know what to say
>After all, you didn't just PASS her test that was supposed to kill you
>You crushed it
>Like-
>Smashed it into a million bits
>You rused the Prince of hell into letting his Jimmies rustle
>Which gave you temporary dominion over his will
>Does that make you like, a duke or something?
>Anon Y. Mous
>Duke of Hell
>Naw
>Too edgy
>H: "Alright, kid. Listen up."
>She speaks
>Muscles, your ass-manic right arm jumps a little at the sound of her voice
>She paralyzed him after a grope too far
>Which is a great alternative to just tossing the both of you into a portal to your doom
>A: "Yeah?"
>H: "I've been wondering somethin'. Mainly about your magic."
>She turns away from her forge, pulling a red hot blade from thin air
>H: "Who taught you? Flesh shaping isn't exactly common. Especially amongst apprentice Warlocks."
>A: "I'm not entirely sure that's what I am."
>H: "Well whatever you are your lessons are all lopsided. Flesh shaping shouldn't be introduced to someone your age let alone your experience level."
>A: "When do people usually start?"
>H: "They START after a lifetime of education in magical theory and proving to their master they can handle real power. Or they inherit it. If they're lucky and talented."
>Talented
>That's what Luna called you
>A: "Y-yeah..."

TELL HEKAPOO ABOUT THE BOOK?

>Y
>N
>>
>1 minute early
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>>
>>1428519
Fortune favors the bold. Tell her.
>>
>>1428519
Yes, but be extremely fucking vague about it. Minimal information.
>>
>>1428519
>Write in
I read it in a book
>>
>>1428519
>Yes

We might as well. After all, we have to if you guys don't wanna talk to Glossaryck.
>>
>>1428519
Yes, I read it in a book
>>
>>1428536
this
>>
Y
>>
>>1428519
>>Yes
>>
N
>>
>>1428536
>>1428519
Tell her the truth.
She doesn't have to know all the details though.
>>
>>1428519
yes
>>
>>1428519
"I saw it in a book"
>>
>>1428536
Supporting this, how she reacts will give us a sense of how to proceed.
>>
>>1428519
I say we should be open about it, but try not to mention the dead world it came from. We do need to ask her if she knows a way to fix Luna, after all.
>>
>>1428536
She already knows that we got stuff from our 'MOM'. She's gonna find out sooner or later, might as well spill the beans now.
>>
>>1428567
Not really. I mean, yes we blurted it out to her, but I don't think she had a chance to really catch onto it.
>>
>>1428519
>Y
>>
>>1428519
We got it from a book who had mentioned that she knew when you were smol
>>
>>1428536
This
>>
>inb4 we get caught in our bullshit, and come off as evil for lying to a goddess.
>>
>>1428607
Its not lying if we're very vague
>>
>>1428536
I'm for this. We don't lie, but don't say more than she asks of us
>>
>>1428612
It's a lie by omission
>>
>>1428536
This, be vague about it.
>>
>>1428623
>>1428607
It's not lying, it's just not telling her shit she doesn't need to know. Or even asked.
>>
>>1428567
>>1428565
>>1428564
>>1428563
>>1428560
>>1428554
>>1428550
>>1428546
>>1428542
>>1428541
>>1428536
>>1428534

>After a moment you gather up the mess of paper and shredded leather that used to be...
>Her
>Luna

https://youtu.be/j4o02JK4HIw

>You hold it up to Hekapoo, who's eyes narrow with confusion
>A: "You see this?"
>You pull back the cover and carefully fold pages to keep her from seeing everything
>A: "On the worst day of my life. Right after I lost my only friend...I found this."
>Her look is harder now
>A: "Well. It found me...and with it came my Mom. She could read the book and gave me my powers."
>She softens
>Clearly accepting of the story you're admonishing
>A: "She believed in me. Like nobody ever has. I got in some trouble with a monster army though and now..."
>You don't shed any tears
>Your lip doesn't tremble
>The only outward sign of distress you can emote is your silence
>A: "She-...she's gone."
>Hekapoo gently takes the page containing her summoning circle
>H: "This language. I've never seen anything like it."
>A: "How? My mom knew who you were!"
>H: "Demons are eternal, kid. Our names spread all over when we get powerful enough. This ritual was the one I let mortals use when I was just a little imp. Before I even got my job working for Lucikron."
>A: "Is tha-"
>H: "The devil."
>She runs her finger down the drawing of her head surrounded by little blades
>H: "Huh. That sandwich 'was' pretty good."
>She tosses the page back
>You almost tip over trying to not let it hit the floor
>H: "So you're looking for somebody to fix your book? Or translate it?"
>A: "Both. If I could read this thing then I might be able to-"
>H: "Save your Mom?"
>A: "Yeah."
>H: "Can't happen."
>Your gut drops inside you
>Ringing silence fills your ears
>This can't be true
>A: "No! No that's impossible! I bring dead things back all the time! I can even do cats and dogs now!"
>H: "Anon. The infinite void doesn't let anything go. Necromancers just tie the souls there back to their old bodies with Willpower."
>No
>Absofuckin'lutely not
>Now the tears threaten to come

https://youtu.be/DhMG7kCPGwk

>A: "My mom's different! She's powerful! Way too powerful to just...die."
>H: "Everybody dies."
>A hand rests on your cheek
>Her skin is as supple as a peach
>Hot too
>Almost like stepping into a shower
>Your face tingles
>H: "I'm sure she must have loved you a lot if she trusted you with this power. Believed in you too."
>She turns back to her work, squaring her strong shoulders into the lever pulls
>H: "With these scissors you can go anywhere. Hrrk! Do anything. Who knows what you'll find. At least a way to figure out that weird language."
>You can't speak yet
>You want to throw up
>H: "Hey now. No tears in my forge. Ask me something. Anything you wanna know."

What ask?
>>
>>1428635
>I-i-it's not lying, I'm just omitting key parts of my story!
>>
Can we fin anyone to translate the texts then?
>>
>>1428645
Do you know someone who might know the language, or someone who might know someone who does?
>>
File: 1493846469235.png (765 KB, 3424x3884)
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[F]
>>
>>1428658
>inb4 Hekapoo goes all "Oh, go to Glossaryck, he knows that kinda stuff"
>>
>>1428645
But if it only tied her to the book, we can find a way to fix the tie, right? All we have to do is find her and reestablish a link, right?

Also, who might know how to translate the book?
>>
>>1428645
We have the ritual to bring her back. We can bring her back.

>"Where would I find someone who would know how to translate this book?"
>>
>>1428645
where do i have to go to get a wand?
>>
>>1428645
Ask if she knows any ancient language experts
>>
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72 KB
72 KB JPG
>>1428645
This is not okay
>>
>>1428673
also this
>>
>>1428645
What is this infinite void? How do I get there?
>>
File: 1493612839609.png (163 KB, 601x601)
163 KB
163 KB PNG
>>1428645
Do you know anyone who might know how to read this? Anyone?
>>
>>1428645
KILL THE MONSTERS
RACE WAR NOW
>>
>>1428645
Where do I start looking for people translate the text?
>>
>>1428673
Oh yeah, this
This was the next step anyways
>>
>>1428645
believe in the ritual that mami showed us
>>
>>1428645
"Could the book just be a link, could we fix it?"
>>
>>1428645
Is there any way we can at least communicate with our mom?
>>
>>1428645
Could she tell us who'd be able to translate the book?

>>1428688
Also this
>>
>>1428676
Better idea, ask her if she's willing to teach us anything
>>
File: 1491896235398.png (216 KB, 657x1215)
216 KB
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Monster genocide soon, fellow questers!
>>
>>1428708
MONSTER GENOCIDE NOW
>>
>>1428645
We'll im sure everyone got the mom questions covered, but i'd really like to ask what her story is.
I mean how does an imp become a Goddess?
>>
>>1428688
>>1428673
>>1428658
These
>>
>>1428719
That's also a good question, i'll second it
>>
>>1428645
>>1428719
supporting this
>>
>>1428673
this would be good

that and who can translate the book
>>
File: YAMETE.jpg (279 KB, 633x719)
279 KB
279 KB JPG
>>1428645
Please stop calling her mom.
>>
>>1428745
no
>>
>>1428745
FUCK OFF UNLOYAL TRASH!
>>
>>1428745
Fuck off AltStar
>>
Rolled 3 (1d10)

>>1428658
>>1428660
>>1428667
>>1428670
>>1428676
>>1428673
>>1428681
>>1428682
>>1428685

>Your hands are shaking
>The pain in your chest feels like a knife that's on fire

>Roll will if you don't wish to cry

>A: "Please. Do you know ANYONE that could read this?"
>Hekapoo thinks for a long time
>H: "I'm not sure you could get them to help you. Not without some serious juice."
>A: "Juice?"
>H: "By which I mean dirt."
>Hekapoo tweaks your nose
>Suddenly muscles is awake
>He goes right for her booty an-
>WHACK!
>OW!
>Your wrist!
>His wrist!
>You guys' wrist has been thwacked with a scissor blade
>You almost laugh
>This so ridiculous
>You're ridiculous
>A little fool in an infinite...
>Hateful
>Hungry world that never seems to stop taking
>Never
>A: "How do I get the dirt?"
>H: "You'll need to get your wand first."
>A: "Fine! I'll do that! How!?"
>H: "You'll need to go to the source of your magic power...condense your connection into a gemstone and bind it to your soul."
>A: "The source..."
>THE HOLE
>H: "What's wrong?"
>A: "Are you familiar with uh...dead worlds?"
>H: "Death planets? Yeah of course Demons use those for makeout spots. Ever heard of a Xenomorph tongue twister?"
>A: "No! Not that! I mean -dead- worlds. Realities with no life."
>Hekapoo looks heckadisgusted at the notion


TELL HER ABOUT THE HOLE?

Y/N?
>>
>>1428779
>Yes
Might as well.
>>
>>1428779
Y
>>
>>1428779
Let's not tell her about the hole.

Furthermore, we have time to cry right now. We need to let it all out.
>>
>>1428786
yep
>>
Rolled 18 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1428779
Mention it, but not where it is.

>rolling for will
>>
>>1428779
>Yes
Been upfront so far, might as well continue
>>
>>1428779
Tell her about it but not where it is yet
>>
yes
>>
Rolled 9 (1d10)

>>1428779
Rolling for will i guess
N
No need.
>>
Rolled 17 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1428779
Mention it.
>>
Rolled 8 (1d20)

>>1428779
>>
Rolled 8 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1428779
Don't Cry
And N
>>
>TFW Heckapoo smites us
>>
Rolled 7 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1428779
>N
>>
>>1428779
Of its existence, but not that we know how to get there. Or at least get back.
>>
Rolled 8 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1428779
>>
Rolled 14 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1428804
Wrong one.
>>
>>1428779
>>H: "What's wrong?"
>>A: "Are you familiar with uh...dead worlds?"
>>H: "Death planets? Yeah of course Demons use those for makeout spots. Ever heard of a Xenomorph tongue twister?"
>>A: "No! Not that! I mean -dead- worlds. Realities with no life."
>>Hekapoo looks heckadisgusted at the notion
>
>
>TELL HER ABOUT THE HOLE?
>
>Y/N?


But... you just TOLD HER.
Like, what's the point Quest. She can put two and two together.
>>
Rolled 11 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1428779
This is what I was afraid of. Let's NOT tell her about the thing she seems disgusted by and just continue asking her about how to make the gemstone.

Also, STEEL WILL!
>>
>>1428779
N
>>
Rolled 6 + 6 (1d20 + 6)

>>1428779
Keep it together man

Yes tell her about the hole
>>
Rolled 2 (1d10)

Rolling a d10 for Anon
>>
>>1428779
N
>>
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14 KB
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>>1428838
>>
>>1428838
Is that good or bad?
>>
>>1428838
we smited now
>>
Rolled 9, 4, 4, 1 = 18 (4d10)

>>1428838
Reroll in order to ensure a roll...
>>
>>1428823
>Cry
>Don't tell her
>>
thats even worse
>>
>>1428779
>Wait, whats a Xenomorph tongue twister ?
>>
>>1428779
>>1428877

supportin
>>
>>1428877
>>1428779
THIS.

Change the conversation.
>>
>>1428877
I'll support this.
>>
>>1428877
This
>>
>>1428877
Yeah, maybe we can get her not to bring attention to the Dead World.

If she tries to go back, ask other questions. Shit like how she makes it, and how to control your shit arm to avoid another groping episode.
>>
>>1428877
Voting for this. Hopefully we don't start sobbing and ourselves seem even more pathetic.
>>
>>1428877
this
>>
>>1428809
>>1428809
Winner

>15 total
>Not enough...

>A: "When Luna found me..."
>H: "Luna?"
>You choke
>A: "I didn't have much. Not much of anything. No looks, no power...no one and nothing."
>You look down at the blank black leather in your fingers
>Her voice echoes in the lost parts of your skull
>The parts that know tenderness
>Warmth
>Happiness
>The first tear falls...
>You try to glare these feelings away
>Your will wraps it's titanic grip around your soul
>Your soul will not be denied
>You fall
>Clutching the book to your chest
>A: "She came to me from a dead world. A world that hurt her and everyone else in it so much that it turned them to nothing. She gave me that world's power...all of it."
>As you look back down, unable to keep eye contact
>You sob
>For the first time in a long time
>You sound like a child
>A hurt child
>In a sick way, it feels good
>Better at least
>To feel
>Snot bubbles out of your mouth and nose
>Still, you go on
>A: "The first time I went there she warned me how dangerous it was. There's things there. -hick- awful things that scavenge the bare bones of her universe."
>H:"Kid..."
>A: "What do I do if I'm just not strong enough to save her?"
>That's when it all comes crashing down
>You feel so much
>Regret
>At being so distracted
>So selfish
>Anger, yes...
>For once, it's anger at yourself
>All boiled in a roiling lake of sadness
>Longing
>For the love that your waking memory has only known once
>Only once
>Hekapoo kneels down
>She embraces you
>A: "Wh-"
>H: "Shut-up you little creep."
>The hug tightens
>Your temper rises
>Pity isn't what you wanted
>H: "I used to be like you."
>A: "Bullshit."
>You choke out
>H: "I used to be helpless. Lost."
>She pulls away, producing the first blade of your scissors from a portal of pure light and heat
>H: "I can promise you. If you don't give up then one day you'll be better than this. Stronger than this."
>A: "I-"
>H: "Even if you fail."
>She turns, the light of her ancient fortress reflected in her blazing eyes
>H: "You've come too far to quit...and failure's better than letting life win."

https://youtu.be/n_D44PHUbIE

>You are Anon
>14 year old boy
>Your soul is iron and fire
>Your will is steel
>You've had love
>You've lost it
>Now you have a mission
>You need a plan
>You need a way to get to the center of THE HOLE
>You also have time
>Time to plan
>Time to train your abilities
>You are Anon...

...and you will NOT be denied your destiny.
>>
>>1428779
Y
>>
>>1428922
Ask her what needs to be done.

Will any gemstone do? How can we bind it to our soul?

Anyway we can make up for some of the dumb shit we did to her? Again, best to get on her good side.
>>
>>1428922
Muscles can deal with it.
And raising an undead army should be EZ EVRY TIME
>>
>>1428922
NOT DENIED OUR DESTINY! Ask H-Poo the first steps to getting a magical gemstone!
>>
>>1428942

this
>>
>>1428922
We need to train, yes. We need to be able to pull a swarm without being near death. Right now, maybe we can find another book to learn from.

Ask H-poo what a xenomorph tongue twister is, lighten the mood.
>>
Ask her for some rope so you can tie muscles to yourself before he tries again.

Then ask what needs to be done.

Could mention muscles being what happened when your arm was torn off
>>
>>1428922
thank her for being so kind and understanding.
ask if she needs any help she can call on you.

when we get the scissors, lets go back to THE HOLE, and make our crystal.
>>
>>1428922
Let's ask Hekapoo how we'd go about creating that wand. She can give us a more in depth explanation on how exactly we'd go about condensing something to a gem and binding it to our soul.
>>
>>1428922
>TRAINING TIME MOTHERFUCKERS
https://youtu.be/gqwuYX3fZZc
>>
>>1428949
>>1428922
This. Lighten the mood.

>>1428922
Afterwards.
Ash her about
>The specifics of wand-making.
>Who might be able to decipher the book.
>How can we become stronger.
>>
>>1428922
Ask her about her story, how she overcame being like us
>>1428938
>Ask her what needs to be done.
>Anyway we can make up for some of the dumb shit we did to her?
Also this
>>
>>1428922
>>1428949
this so much
>>
>>1428922
this >1428949
>>
>>1428922

ANNOUNCEMENT POST

It is time to make a master plan.
During Anon's time in Hekaworld he will be able to train his abilities and experiment with his magic.
You must make decisions on several courses of action for Anon.

He will be able to choose one of each in the following three groups.


>UNLIMITED POWER

-Increase Anon's willpower through meditation and practice. He will gain new powers over both the dead and living.

-Train Physically, increasing Anon's connection and control over Muscles along with his innate abilities


>THE STUDENT

-Teach yourself a new spell of your own imagining, based off of your current spells
This could anything from fusing undead to stealing life force


-Improve the use of one spell permanently

IE raise a permanent minion with raise dead
IE Explode only on command when failing COMBUSTION rolls


>PRODIGAL SON

-Observe the pictures and clues within the book to get an idea of what you'll find in THE HOLE

-Interview Hekapoo about magic items out there in the Multiverse. Anything could give you an edge...


Make your choices.
GO!
>>
>>1428979
>UNLIMITED POWER
>>
>>1428979
>UNLIMITED POWER
and
>THE STUDENT
>>
File: S1E24_Glossaryck.png (1.12 MB, 1366x768)
1.12 MB
1.12 MB PNG
>>1428979
Oh, and don't forget to keep posting those scissors! After our next session which will be SATURDAY at 2:30pm U.S. Central time we will hold the contest! We will choose a winner!

Thanks for playing
>>
>>1428985
>>1428987
You have to choose specificc about each category.
>>
>>1428985
>>1428987

Clarification.

There are 3 groups. Each with 2 options.
Anon may choose one option of EACH group.
>>
>>1428979
>Train Physically
>Research EXPLOSION
>Look for equipment
>>
>>1428979
>UNLIMITED POWER
option A

>THE STUDENT
Option B, so much this. We need to not explode when we fail a roll.

>THE PRODIGAL SON
Option B
>>
>>1428996
gotcha!
>>
>>1428979
Hoo shit!

Alright then.

>Train Physically

Working with Muscles to be two strong minds in one body will be very useful. Gaining new powers of the dead and living is grand, but I feel being able to defend ourselves physically AND keep Muscles' outbursts under control is a good priority.

>Improve the use of one spell
I say we improve raising minions. This can be very helpful in the future.

But quick question: what will happen if we improve BLOOD FOR BLOOD?

>Observe pictures and clues in the book
Magical items are extremely helpful, but we can very well prepare for something that will never happen in THE HOLE.

Our best choice is knowing what can happen and be in there, then prepare for that accordingly.
>>
>>1428979
POWER
B
STUDENT
B
SON
B
>>
>>1428979
>UNLIMITED POWER
-Increase Anon's willpower
>THE STUDENT
-Improve one spell
>PRODIGAL SON
-Observe book
>>
>>1428979
>increase will
>learn STEAL LIFE FORCE
>gather artifacts with Hekapoo
>>
>>1429003
Also, can we ask Hekapoo any questions that doesn't involve interviewing her for magical items?
>>
>>1428979
>unlimited power
increase willpower
>the student
new spell (touching someone can steal their health)
>Prodigal son
Interview hekapoo
>>
>>1428979
Unlimited power should be A
the student, B to perma raise undead
the son, B
>>
>>1428979
>Increase Anon's willpower
>Improve the use of one spell permanently
>Observe the pictures and clues within the book to get an idea of what you'll find in THE HOLE
>>
I never realized how like a baby we truly are.
>>
>>1428996
>>1428989
>>1428979
Quest, will we have multiple of these Timeskips/Training Montages over the quest with H-Poo or others, or is this a one time thing?
>>
>>1428979
> Train Physically
> Improve EXPLOSION
> Interview Hekapoo
>>
>>1428979
UNLIMITED POWER
>>
>>1428979
>UNLIMITED POWER
-Increase Anon's willpower through meditation and practice. He will gain new powers over both the dead and living.

>THE STUDENT
-Improve the use of one spell permanently

>PRODIGAL SON
-Interview Hekapoo about magic items out there in the Multiverse. Anything could give you an edge...
>>
>>1428979
>UNLIMITED POWER
-Train physically

>THE STUDENT
-Improve BfB to not mutate

>PRODIGAL SON
-Interview Hekapoo
>>
>>1428979
>UNLIMITED POWER
I feel like willpower is the way to go, let's build on our strengths
>THE STUDENT
Improve the use of a spell permanently
>PRODIGAL SON
Interview Hekapoo
>>
File: xXxHolic.jpg (1.48 MB, 1405x2200)
1.48 MB
1.48 MB JPG
>>1428922
Anon's relationship with Luna oddly reminds me of xXxHolic.

Also has a young male student that wants to resurrect his older "deceased" magical female teacher (in this story though she runs a shop that grants wishes for a price).

Through his longing to save his teacher, his time becomes frozen and he takes over running the shop. His power begins steadily increasing, and soon he becomes immortal like his teacher originally was, persisting hundreds of years.

The friends that the teacher helped him to make all die around him, and his closest friend ends up having all his future generations go to serve him. The series isn't finished yet, but at this point he'll probably have to become a god if he wants to save her from her fate.

Their relationship is more ill-defined though, it's some ambiguous mix of teacher/student, mother/son, and lovers.


Makes me wonder how this will end for anon.
>>
>>1428979
>UNLIMITED POWER
-Increase Anon's willpower through meditation and practice. He will gain new powers over both the dead and living.

>THE STUDENT
-Improve the use of one spell permanently

>PRODIGAL SON

-Interview Hekapoo about magic items out there in the Multiverse. Anything could give you an edge...
>>
>>1428979
Train Physically (you need to control your arm better)

Teach yourself a new spell (could be many things)

Interview Hekapoo about magic items (maybe one of them is a translator, or something that leads you to a translator)
>>
>>1428979
-Observe the pictures and clues within the book to get an idea of what you'll find in THE HOLE

-Interview Hekapoo about magic items out there in the Multiverse. Anything could give you an edge...
Are you going to throw us into the hole straight after this session? Because i still want to get someone to translate the book first.
>>
>>1428979
>UNLIMITED POWER
-Train Physically
>THE STUDENT
-Improve raise dead
>PRODIGAL SON
-Observe the pictures and clues within the book
>>
>>1428979
>UNLIMITED POWER
Option A.
>THE STUDENT
I would like to learn a new spell, give ourselves a few new options. Perhaps learning to suck the heat out of an opponent would be useful.
>PRODIGAL SON
I would like to do both, but the Artifacts might just give us the edge we need to survive The Hole, and by extension, the rest of the dimensions. Studying The Hole is something I would like to do, but it seems as if we just don't have the time.
>>
>Unlimited Power
Train Will!
>The Student
Learn how to conjure life stones from WoW. Go full warlock.
>The Prodigal Son
Read the book.
>>
>>1428979
>>UNLIMITED POWER
>-Increase Anon's willpower through meditation and practice. He will gain new powers over both the dead and living.
>>THE STUDENT
>IE Explode only on command when failing COMBUSTION rolls
>>PRODIGAL SON
>-Observe the pictures and clues within the book to get an idea of what you'll find in THE HOLE
>-Interview Hekapoo about magic items out there in the Multiverse. Anything could give you an edge...
>>
>>1428979
>POWER
I won't decide.
>STUDENT
New spell: can absorb memories/abilities from dead things (ust temporarily if it would be too OP)
>SON
Ask about magic items
>>
>>1429062
Its still ongoing?
>>
>>1428979
OK. Time for actual plan.

>POWER
Will is our strongest aspect. Let's make it even stronger.

>STUDENT
Improve spells

>SON
If she's willing, H-Poo would work well.
>>
>>1429150
I suggest we become the next Einstein of magical studies and increase our knowledge on how to use it, that way more spell will open up for us over time
>>
>>1429092

For anyone who does not understand, conjure life stone is where a warlock stores life energy into a stone or condenses it into a stone with magical might, creating a Hearthstone, also known as Limestone, which can be used to instantly heal yourself or others.

This spell would appear from BfB, where we sacrifice life for others or them for us, and we would instead store life into stones or gems for later use.

This has the added benefit of putting us on the path to create a soul stone, which we would expend to resurrect ourselves.
>>
>>1429166
Oh man a potential extra life? I am done with that
>>
>>1429174
damn it, down
>>
>>1429166
Completely forgot about soul stones. Those and the green crack would be useful; IF we knew how to make them.

Most likely, there's something akin to that in THE BOOK. Probably uses souls to create them too, so we'll have to rip them out of a still living being in order to fuel our own life. So we'd first have to learn how to rip the soul of out living beings, then how to create things with them.
>>
>>1429062
It's STILL not finished? I remember watching the anime a few years ago
>>
>>1429166
Kinda like soul gems from skyrim?
>>
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>>1428979
>UNLIMITED POWER
Train Physically. Better teamwork with Muscles will allow us to be les awkward during conversations and fight and defend ourselves better.

>>THE STUDENT
New Spell called Thought Prediction.
Using an advanced form of Mind Reading we'll be able to understand how the mind of the enemy works to the point that we'll be able to predict certain actions, statements and even their own thoughts.
This can be used in and out of combat, and can be represented as a toll on out base WILL or as a roll each time we attempt to predict the thoughts of someone.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9jnVadPvjro

>PRODIGAL SON
Interview Hekapoo. She can explain us much about the Multiverse, including pointing us towards someone who can decipher THE BOOK and artifacts that could help us in our quest.
>>
Quest DED?
>>
>>1429228

Sess over

>>1428989
>>
>>1429225
PS: It might be more logical of Thought Prediction to toll WIZ instead of WILL.
>>
>>1429225
Nah, soul gems from skyrim are trapped souls used to empower enchantments. Healthstones are more like health potions or life gems from Dark Souls 2.
>>
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>>1429279
>>
>>1429179

We should be able to make the spell already, since we can transfer life force from one guy to another.

We just gotta store it in pebbles and then we should be good to go.

Souls stones are further down the line.
>>
>>1428979
>UNLIMITED POWER
Train Physically. At least until we don't have a negative str bonus.
>THE STUDENT
-Teach yourself a new spell of your own imagining, based off of your current spells
>PRODIGAL SON
-Interview Hekapoo
>>
>>1429240
Oh wow didn't notice. I swear these sessions are getting shorter and shorter
>>
>>1429339
Today was short because not every session can be a monster-thon of posts
They also seem shorter because much of the shitposting and off-topic stuff has been contained in the Discord
No worries, friend
The party goes on
>>
>>1429339
The last two sessions were super long, I wouldn't say they're getting shorter and shorter.
>>
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>>1429362
Hey quest man I got an offering for the scissor wars if folks like, the inscription on the blades suppose to be Latin for Break Fate.
>>
>>1429420
I'll throw my vote in for this
>>
>>1429420
Holy frack that's pretty heckin cool.
>>
Didn't Luna say she wasn't ACTUALLY the book? Like, maybe her consciousnesses is somewhere in the dead-world and we could potentially hook it back up to something?

POWER: Train will

STUDENT: Improve Spell

SON: Observe the book.
>>
>>1429525
Book Mom's universe lies in meat Mom's broken psyche. Why else did she change hen the book broke.
>>
>>1428979
>UNLIMITED POWER
-Train Physically, increasing Anon's connection and control over Muscles along with his innate abilities
>THE STUDENT
-Improve the use of one spell permanently
Exploding on command is nice and while having the permanent undead would be great I'm still holding out for shadow cat(girl)s
>PRODIGAL SON
-Interview Hekapoo about magic items out there in the Multiverse. Anything could give you an edge...

Sounds too ominous to not choose.
>>
>>1429123
>>1429181
Yeah, the original series ended on a more somber note, but xXxHolic: Cage is the continuation.
>>
>>1428979
>-Train Physically, increasing Anon's connection and control over Muscles along with his innate abilities

>-Teach yourself a new spell of your own imagining, based off of your current spells
Locate Object
If we have a fragment of an object, we can perform a ritual to imprint in our minds an idea of where the rest of the object is, and how to go to reach it.
Handy if, for example, you have one of your foe's hairs.
>>
>>1429420
This is stell, Logic! You keep on bringing the beautiful draws. Love it!
>>
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Pure Steel!
Pure Power!
>>
>>1429812
this would be sweet
>>
>>1429549
Just like R3!

Note: Code Geass season 3 was confirmed legit

Man, CLAMP must have gotten distracted by IdolM@ster as well
>>
Anybody got an archive so that I can catch up?
>>
>>1430493
It's already up
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/qstarchive/1418051/
>>
Gotta ask the real question tho:

Fanart of Muscles surprise-groping Hekapoo when?
>>
>>1430959
A voice cries out in the night
Who will answer?
>>
I have Answered!
>>
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>>1427943
I've revised my submission to the scissors contest. If anyone has any criticism, feel free to shout it at me.
>>
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So I ended up drawing an Anon on accident. Hope it's okay with you guys.
>>
>>1431793
Its perfect
>>
>>1431988
It's perfect, just as you are for making it

Tomorrow we begin one of the most difficult things I have ever asked of 4chan

Executing a plan
>>
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Well, this is my attemp to make my version of annon's scissors, based on >>1428410 and >>1429812 .
The idea is that they can work as daggers by separating themselves, and each part represents annon's physical appearence.
>>
>>1432282
Is that drawn? It looks like a 3D model.
What program did you use?
>>
>>1432282
its painted in photoshop. I made it by creating the scissors in black and white, and then adding it a color layer in color mode.
>>
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>>1428989
>>1427384
Gonna post my scissors now because I don't think I'll have time to make the third pair I wanted to maker.

>>1427593
>>1427943
>>1427992
I made these as a combination of different scissors I made across the thread and changed them here and there.
>>
File deleted.
>>1432317
Those ones are a bit gaudy and detailed. Probably don't fit Anon too much (yet) since he's barely starting to learn about himself and his powers.

>>1428410
>>1429420
>>1429812
These ones are much more minimalist, but have a similar motif.
>>
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>>1432317
>I made across the thread and changed them here and there.
*I SAW across the thread. Those were designed by other Anons.

>>1432318
Shit. Posted the wrong version.

I keep fucking up.
>>
>>1432317
THIS
>>
>>1432282
Very kill la kill hahaha
>>
>>1432386
We are pretty edgy
>>
>>1432386
what can i say, that was a pretty cool concept and we need some extra versatility in out toolkit.
>>
>>1428979
>Unlimited power
Will
>the student
Perma raise undead
>prodigal son
Interview hekapoo
>>
>>1432324
This + T H I C C E R/longer blade
>>
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3 MINUTES LATE
WE GOTTA GO FASTER
>>
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>>1432936
I KNOW. I KNOW.

>>1432324
>>1432318
>>1432317
>>1427384
Managed to make a third pair. Not exactly finished like I wanted it, but at elast I did so before the session started.
This one has a bit more angular design that the previous ones.
The handle is supposed to also work as a hilt if you want to try stabbing something with it.
>>
SESSION START

>You are Anon
>Currently in the depths of a strange, new world
>You've been here for what seems like days
>It worried you at first
>Until your host, the mysterious and pernicious Hekapoo explained time dialation
>Or...tried at least
>H: "So you see since the overall gravity in this world is much MUCH lower than yours time moves faster."
>A: "So I can fly?"
>H: "N-no you goof because overall gravity change is a global effect on mass and matter. Only RELATIVE gravity change affects weight-"
>You then hurt yourself trying to fly
>Ow
>Either way, you've been paying rent here by making sandwiches
>Best currency
>Hekapoo really seems to like your take on her favorite 'wich
>Peanut butter, Banana, and Strawberry Jam
>H: "If only you didn't keep forgetting to cut off the crusts."
>A: "What are you, six?"
>You got teleported to the realm of butts for that one
>The smell haunts you
>H: "I was six when I liked these and I wanna -feel- six when I eat em' so nyeh."
>Hekapoo has been tireless in her work
>She never sleeps
>She rarely eats
>A couple of times she's had to leave, summoned by some fool or another
>She never specified
>You've watched the scissors that will open the gates between worlds being forged
>Can't understand the process for the life of you

>You are Anon
>For the first time in your adventure you have a chance to catch your breath
>To relax
>To think
>To plan


It is time to count...the votes.
>>
>>1433023
>Leaving crust on

Christ Anon, we're edgy, not barbaric.
>>
>>1433023
>votes

I vote for >>1432317 then.
>>
>>1433023
>leaving crust on
UNCIVILIZED SCUM
>>
>>1433023
>eating bread without the crust

THERE IS NO SUCH LEISURE IN THE TRENCHES FAGGOT
>>
>>1433023
I'll vote for
>>1432282
>>
>>1433023
>realm of butts
I fail to see how this is a problem
>>
>>1433073
>tfw it's all hairy, pimply, smelly, man butt.
>>
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>>1433075
>>1433073
It's not the nice kind of butts.
>>
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>>1433023
>>1433023
>>1433023

THE VOTES

>IMPROVE WILL
14 votes

>TRAIN PHSYICALLY
11

THE PATH IS DECIDED

https://youtu.be/riwxbh_n_WM

>This power
>It was a gift
>A chance that up until now you've toyed with
>No more
>Mother saw something in you
>Something incredible
>You're not sure what it was but...
>You know one thing
>Your Will has carried you through everything
>Your iron desire
>Your steel resolve
>It is time to sharped that weapon's edge
>To hone yourself into a monument of resolution
>As the days pass you spend your night excising your powers of control

>Muscles' outbursts become easier to control
>Although it doesn't please him or bond you, it makes things with Hekapoo much easier
>You find that the thoughts you hear now are more private
>Your powers of persuasion begin to manifest in new ways
>You can make undead move in new ways
>Where as before they shambled and bumbled, now they can salute
>They can climb
>They can run
>They can even dance
>More of each zombie's personality emerges
>You can tie their souls to this world with immense rapidity
>Hekapoo watches on in silence
>A: "What?"
>She smirks
>H: "Nothin', kid."
>Whatever


NEW TRAITS UNLOCKED

>Immune to persuasion and suggestion
>Undead minions are now ARTICULATE
>Summoning tiny creatures NO LONGER REQUIRES ROLLS
>Muscles has been restrained

ANON'S WILL IS NOW +8


YOU ARE LEVEL 5

pt 2 incoming
>>
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>>1433089
>+8 WILL
>>
>>1433089
>Muscles has been restrained
fucking finally
>>
>now they can salute
>>
>>1433089
>Undead minions can now articulate

Interrogation just became MUCH easier.
>>
>>1433089
Finally, we'll only fail normal difficulty DC Will rolls on a 1
>>
>>1433089
This will be our enemies soon enough,


BTW. Does Muscles resent us for restraining him? Can we get on his good side yet?
>>
>>1433089
>Immune to persuasion and suggestion
Sick

>Undead minions are now ARTICULATE
SICK

>Summoning tiny creatures NO LONGER REQUIRES ROLLS
HOLY SHIT, THATS SICK

>Muscles has been restrained
And great.

Army of Undead vs Army of monsters
I think we got this.
>>
>>1433089
Restraining Muscles is nice but I want to form a bond with him and be bros
>>
>>1433110
We had to establish rules with him, but being bros would be cool too
>>
>>1433110
We can still do that over time ourselves.
>>
>>1433110
>>1433115
Yeah. Muscles must first learn that he can't always indulge himself, then we can let the bro-bonding begin.
>>
>animated creatures can now articulate and are more nimble

>animate dead frog
>hide it in Marco's room
>have it sing and dance when discovered by Marco
>if he shows it to anyone else have it act like a normal frog
>continue sending frogs if he gets rid of it
This is our first priority upon returning to Earth. Any objections?
>>
>>1433143
I concur!
>>
>>1433143
the frog must have a suit and top hat when dancing, otherwise it would be lame.
>>
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>>1433089
>>1433089
>>1433089

THE VOTES

>NEW SPELL
10 votes

>IMPROVE ONE SPELL PERMANENTLY
18 votes...
THE PATH IS DECIDED

https://youtu.be/fr6KVNt-1Ek

>It rains here
>Shocking, considering how empty the planet seemed
>When it rained at first you stayed in
>Talking with Hekapoo between sessions of intense focus training
>You learned about hell
>How strictly it's machinations turn
>How narrowly you escaped being dragged to the pit by Tom
>Hekapoo spared no words on that
>You've been dancing on the razor's edge this whole time
>It's time
>Time to have abilities you can rely on
>You go into the rain
>Standing in the downpour you cast everything you know
>You burn the droplets from the air
>You summon gangs of forgotten bone monsters to headbang and mosh
>You snap Muscles into fantastic shapes and weapons
>You explode
>You fall
>You fail
>You suffer
>You get up
>Over
>and Over again
CHOOSE

>THE MASTER (Improved Raise Dead)
-CONTROL 2 UNDEAD FOR EACH WILL POINT SPENT
-MAINTAINING THEIR PRESENCE COSTS NOTHING
-UNDEAD CAN NOW WIELD WEAPONS


BY FIRE, REBORN (Improved Combust)
-INCREASED WISDOM
-YOUR OWN FIRE CANNOT BURN YOU
(Thing caught on fire can)
-CHOOSE BETWEEN BLAZING FLAMES OR EXPLOSIONS on successful rolls (Failed rolls no longer explode you)

POWER IN THE FLESH
-USE BLOOD FOR BLOOD ON ENEMIES (Low damage, But heals you for all damage it deals)
-MUTANT MASHER
(Muscles can warp into multiple weapon types, changing his damage and usefulness)
-ZOMBIE CRAFTING
>>
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>>1433167
EXPLOSIONS!
>>
>>1433167
>THE MASTER
>>
>>1433167
POWER IN THE FLESH!
>>
>>1433167
THE MASTER
>>
>>1433167
POWER IN THE FLESH
-USE BLOOD FOR BLOOD ON ENEMIES (Low damage, But heals you for all damage it deals)
-MUTANT MASHER
(Muscles can warp into multiple weapon types, changing his damage and usefulness)
-ZOMBIE CRAFTING
>>
>>1433167
>POWER IN THE FLESH

WE SHALL SUCK THE LIFE OUT OF LUDO!
>>
>>1433167
POWER IN THE FLESH
>>
>>1433167
Shit, I want an army of bone people, but I also want to explode anything and everything.

Fuck...

I think THE MASTER is the most practical choice for now.
>>
>Power in the flesh
>>
>>1433167
POWER IN THE FLESH
>>
>>1433167
>POWER IN THE FLESH
>>
>>1433167
NO ONE CAN BEAT US IF WE'RE ON FIRE
ESPECIALLY IF THE FIRE DOESN'T HURT US
BY FIRE, REBORN
>>
>>1433167
POWER IN THE FLESH
>>
>>1433167
MASTER

In the dead world, it will be the most useful.
>>
>>1433167
>>THE MASTER (Improved Raise Dead)
Most practical one we have so far. It'll also allow us to build up a permanent army.
>>
>>1433167
FLESH FLESH!!!!
>>
Rolled 3 (1d3)

>>1433167
Not sure what I want, so I'll roll a d3, 1 is The Master, 2 is By Fire, and 3 is Power in the Flesh
>>
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>>1433167
>>1433168
GOD DAMN IT FINE

Changing vote to Power in the Flesh.
>>
Her is the Master Plan plan
>Get Power of Flesh
>Become Dr. Frankenstein
>Make huge undead Amazon servant
>Train it
>Put it in a maid outfit
There i literally solved this whole quest.
>>
POWER IN THE FLESH
>>
>>1433219
What about the part where we revive Luna and get revenge on Ludo?
>>
>>1433192
FLESH acutally.
>>
>>1433219
>>Make huge undead Amazon servant
>>Train it
>>Put it in a maid outfit
>>
It is time...to count.
>>
>>1433167
THE MASTER


Will going for one of these routes lock us out of training the others?
>>
>>1433239
Um hello, undead Amazon maid.
Its like you're pretending to be retarded.
>>
>>1433167

>POWER IN THE FLESH

Now we can survive fights by more than just the skin of our teeth. We'd probably be far more capable in combat than our zombies ever would be, but being able to customize them in some way gives us tons of options with how we use them.
>>
>>1433251
>putting Mommy in a maid outfit
>not something more fitting for a mom
how dare you
>>
>Learn Power in Flesh
>Shape Muscle into Kar's buzzsaw glitter blade.
>Blast a nigga to pieces with Divine Sandstorm while playing Darude Sandstorm.
>Using extreme flesh crafting to halt molecular vibration in muscles to make a Dio ice grab.
>Do the opposite and vaporize a Bitch with our own blood.
>Drain our arch nemesis dry with Drain life.
>Any other option
Why even?
>>
>>1433263
Don't forget
>STINGY
>EYE
>SPACE
>RIPPERS
>>
>>1433251
Oh good, for a second I thought you were going to have us go full Dr. Frankenstein and forget the reason we made an undead abomination in the first place.

>>1433262
That's his fetish.
>>
>>1433281
>enforcing your fetishes on Mommy
>>
>>1433292
Agreed

We need to enforce our fetishes on everyone else to show just how powerful we are. It might disturb her, but she'll be proud at how we've taken control.
>>
>>1433292
So how's it being dead, Obi?
>>
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>>1433167
>>1433167
>>1433167


THE VOTES

>THE MASTER
6 votes

>BY FIRE REBORN
1 votes

>POWER IN THE FLESH
13 votes


THE PATH IS DECIDED


https://youtu.be/9xC459XOAfs


>You began to notice patterns
>In the bones
>In the desiccated flesh you raise up out of Hekaworld's dying ground
>How they connect
>How they move
>Your Will pushes them...but the flesh is what gives them power
>You experimented with Muscles first
>Expanding your fist
>Hardening it
>Bristling the spines that grow from your elbow and shoulder onto your knuckles
>A Mace
>A scepter of a weapon
>You trained with the Skeletons
>Dodging their attacks
>Clobbering them to bits
>You put them back together in thousands of ways
>Heads for feet
>Skeleton trains
>Skeleton towers
>Skeleton wheels
>The horror
>You become to used to the smell of your own blood
>You're numb to it
>The wretches of gore affect you a pittance in comparison to when you first left THE HOLE
>Muscles shows you his new blade form
>It pleases you
>Especially when it slices though the ancient trees
>Cleaves boulders in twain
>You challenged Hekapoo to a sword fight
>Sh-she kicked your ass
>Kissed your knee though so uh...
>A: "Score."
>Got paralyzed for 6 hours
>This dame can't take a joke
>At one point, out of sheer curiosity you nibbled one of your bone creatures
>Blech
>BLLLLEEECH
>You nearly threw up twice
>You also stopped having your nose dribble blood everywhere
>Did you just...
>H: "Self healing. Nice."
>A: "Wha-"
>H: "Yeah. It's a hallmark of a good Necromancer."
>A: "Is that what I am?"
>Hekapoo chuckles
>Sparks fly out of her tear ducts
>H: "At this point, Anon I don't think there's ever been something like you."
>Good
>This world shouldn't be ready for you


FINAL POST INCOMING
>>
>>1433310
Hekapoo best girl.
>>
>>1433324
Was there ever a doubt?
>>
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>>1433310
>>Skeleton trains
>>Skeleton towers
>>Skeleton wheels
>>
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>>1433338
>>1433310
>>
>>1433338
>Skelecopters
Why do I always forget this?
>>
>>1433327
What about Luna?
>>
>>1433347
Best Mami
>>
>>1432282
voting for this
>>
>>1433310
NOBODY IS FUCKING READY
THINK OF THE POSSIBILITIES
SKELEFRIDGES
SKELRPLANES
SKELEBRIDGES
SKELETRAINS
SKELERAIN
SKELEPAIN
SKELEMETEOR
SKELESTARSTORM
SKELEMAIDS
ANON CONFIRMED FOR NEW GOD OF THE MULTIVERSE
>>
>>1433372
>SKELEMAIDS
>ANON CONFIRMED FOR NEW GOD OF THE MULTIVERSE
>>1433297
Oh no. It's already happening.
>>
>>1433310
>>1433310
>>1433310

The votes...

>Read the THE BOOK
6 votes

>Learn of artifacts from Hekapoo
18 votes

The path...is decided.


https://youtu.be/V7uEb_XrK1U


>You've been here for months
>Bleeding
>Sweating
>Striving
>You are so much more than when you came
>Your body is lean and hardened
>Not bulky or more powerful...but more intense in it's solidarity
>Your mind has settled into a steady ticking rhythm
>Plans form and fade with articulation and ease
>Your eyes reflect a silent confidence
>Your presence is that of a king
>Not a boy
>The undead bow to you now
>They rejoice your coming
>The flesh obeys
>You are Anon
>The world has never seen anything like you
>You will make sure that it pays for what it's done
>You will get back everything that was lost


>As you glare into the grey sky the rain stops
>Guess you're done training today
>You step into the forge, letting the ambient heat dry your skin
>Hekapoo turns from her work
>She takes in the boy
>No
>The young man that stands before her


>H: "From a nothing...to a Master of his Self."
>She crosses her arms
>H: "From an amateur to a virtuoso of creation."
>She floats down, having to stay above the ground to keep eye level with you now
>H: "From a lost little boy to a man in the making."
>A: "I'm not a man."
>Hekapoo raises her one exposed eyebrow
>You grin


https://youtu.be/V7uEb_XrK1U

>A: "I'm THE Man!"


ANON'S CHARACTER SHEET}

https://pastebin.com/UHYYajzX

>YOU
>are anon...
>The Universe will know you
>It will fear you

>CHAPTER COMPLETE: Who do you choose to be?

>NEW CHAPTER START: The Wild Black Yonder

>YOU ARE NOW LEVEL 6
>>
>>1433479
>>1433479

The second song for this post was not Mother.

It was this.

https://youtu.be/qcWKZTI9OC4
>>
>>1433479
Give Hekapoo a huge thanks.

Offer something like "You can drop by anytime you want a PB&J."
>>
>>1433502
This

Do we spaghetti from the compliments?
>>
>AC 10
We need armor yesterday.
>>
>>1433479

>>1433502
THIS

Also, I assume the post about Hekapoo giving us unfo on the Multiverse is still missing?
>>
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>Pic related

This has to become our ace in the hole.
>>
>>1433512
nah, we should be immnune to her complimenting us by now.
>>
>>1433479
>NEW CHAPTER START: The Wild Black Yonder
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O3F1LMFTsvs
>>
>>1433479
>>1433479
>>1433479

Now, everyone congratulations! You've completed this section of our adventure.
It's time to choose our scissors!

We have some wonderful entrants. Be sure to vote on your favorites! The next post will be affected by the winner!

http://www.anonvote.com/poll/g545479yq

THE CONTEST BEGINS!
We have an hour for voting and arguing.
Good luck!

Thanks to everyone who provided and all of you for playing.
>>
>>1433578
I'm just happy so many people made up some scissor ideas.
I'm happy with any of them even if the one I voted for doesn't win.
>>
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We should have a flag for our future Skeltal Army.
I suggest this one
>>
Why pick the plain anonymous scissors rather than the mom themed anonymous one, or chipped break fate one?
>>
>>1433670
What does each thing symbolize?

Symbolism is very important in a flag.
>>
>>1433676
Because they symbolize the universe's heavy desires to make Anonymous the most average person possible.
>>
>>1433682
The eye is Momma's all seeing eye, always watching over her children
The pink is her color, the one who gave us the strength to become who we are
>>
>>1433682
Jackie, our Mom, and Janna keeping an eye on us
>>
>>1433684
Seems odd to give into the universe's desires then. Thought the whole point was to rage against the world/fate/the universe to take back what was stolen.

I will say I'm entirely unimpressed with the winning choice because my grandmother has scissors just like it.
>>
>>1433694
And the spades with stars on them? Plus what's with the eye's horns and other lines.
>>
>>1433694
Plus watch self respecting villain is going to admit he was defeated by an army who's flag is pink?
>>1433703
I agree, they are drawn nicely but they look so generic
>>
>>1433708
The Spades represent the tools used to change the world. Entire mountains can become nothing with the spade
>>
>>1433708
The Horns show we will not be pushed around and that we will stand our ground.
The Lines are how each soldier is connected to Anon and by extension Momma by her magic
>>
>>1433721
but we don't use spades. we've never used spades at all.
>>
>>1433748
Look on Momma's cheeks
>>
>>1433748
It's because Quest used Eclipsa's image whenever Luna talked to us and Eclipsa has spades on her cheeks
>>
File: giphy.gif (1.51 MB, 334x446)
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>my submission got a vote
>>
>>1433578
>>1433578
>>1433578
>>1433578

30 minutes remain on the contest!

SHARPEN YOUR BLADES!
>>
>>1433790
Well, I cast my vote. Good graces to the design that wins.

Quest, are we continueing the session after the votes?
>>
>>1433828
>>1433828
Yes, we are

The scissors are just a very important step in the story
>>
>>1433549
We need to make 3 of those.
>>
We should show up to the game using our scissors like a total baller
>>
Guys, we should make our own Bodyguard Skeltal
>>
>>1433917
I think people will be more surprised by Anon suddenly looking like he's been through hell and somehow made it his bitch.
>>
>>1433923
Give it a Thick German accent just cause
>>
>>1433923
Then we flesh mold it to become an amazon
>>
>>1433928
im pretty sure we won't; remember what happened to marco.
>>
>>1433937
Then put it on a maid dress.
>>
>>1433923
Can we make it essentially Baby Skeltal except also our age?

Also, I think we can't give our bodyguards weapons...
>>
>>1433950
Dude, we can make his arms INTO weapons
>>
>>1433940
Overlord route confirmed
>>
>>1433578
>>1433578
>>1433578

>Hekapoo draws symbols into the air with her fingers
>They leave traces of glowing orange heat
>H: "I tried so many different configurations."
>You see nearly a dozen pass by
>Some warped
>Some looking more like weapons than tools
>Your head spins
>H: "A lot of them could have worked but..."
>She places one design into your hand
>As if it were real
>H: "This one spoke to me. It reminds me of you."
>A: "The eye..."
>H: "Yeah?"
>A: "Where did you see it?"
>H: "Oh! It's in your book. Heh, I peeked a little."
>You smirk
>A: "Thanks."
>H: "Oh, did you learn some manner while you were freeloading off me-"
>You have Hekahugged the Hekapoo.
>She was not Hekspecting that
>H: "Whoah, hey! Calm down I was just...doin' my job, kid."
>She's red again
>A: "You ever want a sandwich. Anytime. Rip my shit up and come over, ok?"
>H: "Doesn't that usually go in reverse order?"
>A: "What?"
>H: "Nothing. Look, this has been...weird."
>A: "You're telling me."
>H: "No I mean WEIRD."
>You've been booped
>On the nose
>How fucking dare y-
>H: "You're nothing like the other I've ever met. You're a mess. Your powers don't make sense and you teach yourself almost as fast as an arch-mage."
>A: "So I'm awesome?"
>H: "No. You suck."
>A: "Hey!"
>H: "You're just awesome at it."
>A: "..."
>Heckapoo pats your head, trying to assuage your confusion
>H: "Lemme just tell you how the scissors work, kiddo."
>A: "S-sure."
>H: "H'okay. Basically so...dis? Is deh eart."
>A: "Why are you talking like that?"
>H: "Don't you have the internet in your world?"
>A: "Y-yeah."
>H: "Lurk moar."
>A: "I-"
>H: "RIP AlbinoBlackSheep."
>A: "Lady, cmon I got places to be."
>H: "Fine, fine. Basically my scissors can take you anywhere within your universe. Your reality. That includes here. Earth. Mewni. Hell. Or any other pocket existence."
>A: "Pocket existence?"
>H: "Yeah, like this."
>She sears a hole in the air with her own blades
>Inside is PIC RELATED
>A: "OHSHIT OSHIT OSHIT CLOSE IT CLOSE ITTT!"
>She zips the hole closed just as the creature's weird pseudo penis stinger was about to come through
>She whispers "Call me." into the residual magic as the portal disappears
>As the portal is swept away she gently grasps your human hand
>H: "Any questions before I shuffle you back to your shitty life?"
>A: "Uh...yeah."
>H: "Mhm."
>A: "A lot, actually."
>H: "How many?"
>A: "How many can I ge-"
>H: "You get three."
>A: "Shit."


YOU ARE ALLOWED TO ASK HEKAPOO THREE QUESTIONS ABOUT MAGICAL ARTIFACTS

VOTE FOR QUESTION 1

>WEAPONS
>ARMORS
>DEVICES
>>
>>1434015
Priorities, people.
>DEVICES
>>
>>1434015
>DEVICES
>>
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>>1434015
>>1434015
>>1434015
>>1434015

OUR WINNER! BEHOLD, ANON'S NEW SCISSORS!

http://imgur.com/a/EzrSF

Congratulations!
>>
>>1434015
Armor God damn it, our AC is fucking 10.
>>
>>1434015
>>DEVICES
>>
>>1434015
Devices.
>>
>>1434015
>>ARMORS
Anon is super squish and has come -this- close to dying many many times now in very short order. Some defense would be useful, I'm not suggesting going for JUGGERNAUT, but enough to not get stabbed in the back by some random crackhead who needs money for his next fix.
>>
>>1434015
DEVICES
>>
>>1434015
>DEVICES
>>
>>1434015
Armors please.
>>
>>1434015
>>ARMORS
>>
>>1434015
>ARMORS

Maybe we can improve our own clothes to be armored?
>>
>>1434015
ARMOR
>>
>>1434015
Armor pls
>>
>>1434015
>ARMORS
>>
>>1434015
Armor pls
>>
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>>1434015
>>1434015

The pic related in question.
>>
>>1434076
NOPE

DON'T WANT

HAPPY WITH CLOSED DOOR
>>
>>1434015
>H: "H'okay. Basically so...dis? Is deh eart."
but i am le tired :(
>>
>>1434015
Let's start with armor
>>
>>1434015
Last question should be "can we see each other again?" Or some form of it.
>>
>>1434111
Dude, we got our own scissors. We can prolly visit any time we want. Marco could, I don't see why we can't.
>>
>>1434015
Armor
>>
>>1434111
We just summon her again.

All right, plans.

Gotta learn to read THE BOOK or find someone who can translate it
Gotta get revenge on Ludo
Gotta make a wand - find a gemstone and crystallize the Dead World's power into it
Gotta keep getting together with Jackie to cuck the shit out of Marco
Gotta hang with Emperor Justinian of the Brozantine Empire.

Q. How hard would it fuck canon if we killed Ludo?
>>
>>1434132
I don't see "Bring Momma Back" on that list. When it should be.

Also, since he's kind of a major player, we'll be majorly fucking with canon. And it'd be fucking awesome.
>>
>>1434132
A. Extremely.
>>
>>1434034
>>1434038
>>1434040
>>1434041
>>1434042
>>1434043
>>1434050
>>1434050
>>1434056
>>1434064
>>1434066
>>1434068
>>1434071

>Armors
11 votes

>Devices
6 votes

>You look down at your threads
>Which is what they are
>Threads
>Literally strings hanging from your surprisingly toned torso
>Nice
>You've been booped on the last bit of stomach you have
>You withdraw instinctively as Hekapoo laughs at your modesty
>A: "I need some armor. Something to help me deal with getting my ass kicked all the time."
>H: "Huh. Have you tried not getting hit?"
>A: "Yes I-"
>H: "It's called 'dodge' have you ever heard of it?"
>A: "...you done?"
>H: "Not by a long shot. Still, I can give you lead on some Armor. If you can get your hands on some gold the Mewmans make some of the best armor out there. Plus, it can be magically summoned by it's owner."
>A: "Oh, sick where can I get some gold?"
>H: "Ever been to Mewni? I hear they have great peasant labor camps."
>A: "...maybe I don't want any Mewman anything. Their princess is a dink anyways."
>H: "Well. The scales of a swamp drake are light and durable. Plus you wouldn't need to get it repaired! The scales grow back even in death!"
>A: "Even in death...hm."
>That could be interesting.
SECOND QUESTION

>WEAPONS
>DEVICES
>>
>>1434149
Devices
>>
>>1434149
devices
>>
>>1434121
>>1434132
More that we got 3 questions, and we gave one to ask if we could hang.

Like ask if we could hang this weekend on earth.
Answer is probably no, but that social link progress
>>
>>1434149
QUICK! ENGINEER A TIE TO FORCE A SPECIAL EVENT

>Devices
>>
>>1434149
Would you go on a date with me?
>>
>>1434149
>H: "It's called 'dodge' have you ever heard of it?"

This is precisely why we shoulda asked Devices first.

Besides. Asking about Devices might open up more questions in regards to devices.
>>
>>1434149
>>DEVICES
>>
>>1434149
>>DEVICES
>>
>>1434149
>DEVICES
>>
>>1434149
Devices
>>
>>1434149
>DEVICES
>>
>>1434149
Devices
>>
>>1434149
>H: "Well. The scales of a swamp drake are light and durable.
Grant resistance to mephitic cloud too.
>>
>>1434167
Pls. Casual only for now.
>>
>>1434149
>>1434149

>With a near Unanimous vote for DEVICES

>A: "You said there might be someone who could read my book...but that I'd need serious juice to get their help. Who is it?"
>H: "I still don't want to tell you."
>A: "Why not!?"
>H: "Because I know that look on your face. You'll run off the find them and get yourself killed for it."
>A: "That's what you thought would happen with Tom."
>Hekapoo flicks your nose
>Ow
>That was hot
>You think the skin on your face cooked a little
>H: "You got lucky with Tom. Lucky or something in the void is looking out for you, at least. This guy is no joke. He's dangerously wise and a real pain the Hek."
>She points vaguely to her rump
>H: "My Hek!"
>Muscles twitches
>He hasn't made any moves on Hekapoo since you focused your will
>It's like he's been trying to talk to you through a mattress pressed on top of his head
>You'd like to let him loose but...
>BUTTS
>Yeah, that
>A: "So is there anything that could help me? At least help me once I go back to THE HOLE?"
>H: "Hmm....fine."
>A: "What?"
>H: "You ever read about Knights when you were a kid?"
>A: "Some. I was more of a video games kinna kid."
>H: "Of course you were."
>Hekapoo hands you something strange
>A rock?
>It's covered in runes
>H: "You think you're a badass? Fine. Here's your chance to prove it. This is a map."
>A: "To what?"
>H: "To the lair of an ancient Sorcerer. He's in a parallel world to mine. He has something called the Eyes of the Skull-Lord."
>A: "Edgy."
>H: "I know, right? It's why he wasn't let on the council. Always with the spikes and skulls and his 'NYEHHH!'"
>She throws her arms up and flexes
>You see no muscle definition and snicker at her fluff
>You have been head slapped
>H: "Just get to his castle, kick his minion's ass and use that map to find his treasure chamber. I garuntee if you get the eyes you'll never get lost in that void ever again."
>Tears are stinging the edges of your eyes
>Hair is burnt to your head
>A: "That's cool."
>You grunt
>H: "I know. Now say thank you."
>A: "Fuck you."
>Back to the buttworld
>At least this'll give you a chance to come up with another question

WHAT ASK?
>>
>>1434284
Grumpy pants, we should try asking for a whose who of the multiverse, sorta like general things to be aware of so we don't accidently create reality aides or something because we fucked with a Gods harem reality or something
>>
>>1434284
"Would you mind hanging out later?"
>>
>>1434284
go into more details about creating a wand
>>
>>1434284
Ask if you can get a butt slap for the road.
You know, for Muscles.
>>
>>1434301
Supporting. Then ask for if she would mind taking a selfie for memory's sake.
>>
>>1434284
whats a Xenomorph tongue twister?
>>
>>1434284
Since we are now going to be a slider does she have any advice on what to watch out for hen we travel? Names e should know, places we should watch out for, big ol' danger signs e might need to know about before we run face first into them.

>>1434311
Tell her she can slap our butt, make things even.
>>
>>1434301
this
>>
>>1434284
>Ask about things we should watch out for along the way.
>>
>>1434284
Ask for a selfie.
>>
>>1434284
>>1434324
supporting this
>>
>>1434284
ask her how to create a wand
>>
>>1434284
>>1434348
This
>>
>>1434300
This. In our world or hers
>>
>>1434324
Supporting
>>
>>1434284
Actually changing my vote to this>>1434300
>>
>>1434284
>>1434300
Actually have this be first, and as she tosses us out of the portal in a last ditch effort ask this.
>>1434324
>>
>>1434400
This would be good
>>
>>1434301
This
>>
>>1434284
Either Wand Crafting, hanging out later or Xenomorph Tongue Twister.
>>
If we vote to hang out we can ask about the xenomorph tongue twister later
>>
>>1434284
changing my vote from
>>1434324
to
>>1434301
>>
>>1434300
We should totally hang with her in the future. She's been one of the few sleeves of encouragement
>>
>>1434324
This seems good.
>>
>>1434462
Vote for hanging out as if we do get to hang out we could ask her then. Not to mention that we could secure a demon god as a friend.
>>
voting for hanging out
>>
Let's hang out with the thicc demon
>>
>>1434300
>>1434435
>>1434460
>>1434462
>>1434478
>>1434482
>>1434495
Anon is such a slut.
>>
>>1434503
yes a kiss less virgin slut
>>
>>1434503
Yeah, he is
>>
Have we ever tried communication with muscles through telepathy. i think we should atleast try once
>>
>>1434513
Quest says it's unnecessary since we can perfectly 'sense' his motives and purpose if we want to since we're connected in such an intimate way.
>>
>>1434521
>Muscles feels it when you JO
>Sending images of butts
>How would an arm even get off? Just flail around a lot?
>>
>>1434531
Perhaps some questions are better left unanswered.
>>
>>1434300
>>1434301
>>1434324
Three lovely suggestions. All with equal support.

SPECIAL EVENT

>The portal re-opens
>You're back
>On Hekapoo's floor
>With Hekpoo's foot on your shoulder
>Why is this still hot?
>A: "I have so many things I still wanna ask."
>H: "I can't be giving you history lessons about the multiverse forever, kid."
>A: "No, I mean about you. You're pretty incredible."
>Hekablush has come
>Ohshit
>Your heart's dick
>H: "C-cmon, you little creep lay off that. You're a fleeting flash of mortal life in an infinite cosmos and I'm an eternal flame goddess from hell. How does that add up to 'buddies' or anything else for that matter?"
>She rips open one last portal
>Then lets you up
>H: "Get outta here. Go on. Go! Before I change my mind about leaving your butt in the badly animated 2001 cartoonverse."
>A: "You got a Headbook?"
>H: "Hugga do you have ears!?"
>A: "That's not a no."
>You pull out your phone
>Show her your profile
>Oh, shit your pic is still from when you bought that V for Vendetta mask delet delete!
>She takes your phone
>A silence hangs as she fiddles with it
>Then hands it back
>H: "Congrats."
>A: "Heh, tha-"
>HekaHEADLOCK!
>Snap!
>You have uploaded a new profile picture!
>>
>>1434536
>>1434536
>>1434536

>HEADBOOK NOTIFICATION

>Marco Diaz has shared your profile picture

>M: "Haha what even is this? Cosplay?"

>Star Butterfly has commented on Marco Diaz's post

>SB: "?!!? HEKAPOO!? WHAT ARE YOU DOING ANON!? " Followed by an army of confused puppy and monkey Emojis
and a gun

>You choke out of Hekapoo's grip
>A: "Dick."
>H: "Maybe sometimes."
>As you rub your neck you can't help but quip
>A: "What's a Xenomorph tongue twister?"
>H: "Everything that you shouldn't do with your teeth."
>A: "I-"
>Hekapoo has no sides
>Not even her own
>You're crimson
>Lack of fear doesn't mean lack of shame
>Damn humanity
>Stupid hormones
>You're even more of a teen now than you were when you left
>You snap at her
>A: "Now listen HeRee-"
>You clamp your mouth
>Your voice just cracked like an egg
>Hekapoo is like a floating roof
>All foundation and ceiling
>No fucking sides
>You start stomping off toward your room, muttering like Yosemite Sam
>As you step in Hekapoo pulls your ear
>H: "Hey."
>A: "Ah! AH stop I need those!"
>H: "Don't talk to anyone who says they know me."
>A: "Anyone?"
>H: "Especially if they have a crystal for a head."
>A: "Ok?"
>H: "Also. Avoid Princesses."
>A: "All of em? I mean, I don't usually meet any. Should I avoid Star Butterly-AH!"
>Your ear is being Hek-gripped
>H: "Especially Star Butterfly. She's a bad accident waiting to happen."
>You're released
>Hekapoo gives you one last smile
>H: "See ya, kid."
>A: "Heh. I will see ya."
>You flash your phone
>A: "I will!"


You are home
You are Anon
It is now precisely 3 minutes from when you left
Your room is a total wreck

>A: "Hm...what do?"


SESSION END


We will continue tomorrow at 3:00pm U.S. Central time! Be there! Or not! It's your Life!
Thanks for playing!
>>
>>1434545
>A: "Hm...what do?"

Now Anon? Now we'll start proving Hek wrong. We'll get Momma back.

Thanks for running Quest!
>>
I was going to complain that it feels like we're dragging our feet this session but the last two posts were bretty gud.

Looking forward to tomorrow Quest.
>>
>>1434545
We bring Momma back of course
But for now we clean up our mess
>>
>>1434545
>>H: "Everything that you shouldn't do with your teeth."
[needtoknowmoreintensifies].gif

These two are fucking adorable. Now I understand why anon as bullied his hole life.

So did we have anywhere we needed to go with these scissors or do we have them just because? If not I say we need to get some undead handymen to fix our shit.
>>
>>1434545
>SB: "?!!? HEKAPOO!? WHAT ARE YOU DOING ANON!? " Followed by an army of confused puppy and monkey Emojis
and a gun
>and a gun
What did she mean by this?
>>
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>>1434606
It's to help us get our wand. Our awesome jazzy musical undead making wand.
>>
>>1434545
>H: "Especially Star Butterfly. She's a bad accident waiting to happen."
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T2vDFioDR-0

Now then, let's get some sleep or something.
>>
>>1434545
we get a new look. We're no longer a sad and lonely loser. Now we're a cool loner that has friends.
>>
>>1434629
>cool loner that has friends

Soooo... Squall Leonhart?
>>
>>1434631
>Squall Leonhart
hell if i know. i've never played final fantasy
>>
>>1434614
Right, get to the hole world and condense it into a crystal.

Well, Hekahotty just warned us about going near the leading expert on crystals so next move is on the Skeletor she mentioned.

Still we need to get this place fixed.
>>
>>1434545
>Sleep. Remember that it's nighttime, and good Heroes should be getting their Hero Naps.
>>
>>1434609
she wants to murder us with a gun that shoots cute emojis and puppies.... what a sick bastard.
>>
>>1434629
We're on our way to being more like Seifer than Squall.
>>
>>1434673
She can hold a gun sideways all she likes
But she better clear out when the skeleton wheels roll up.
>>
>>1434648
Wait, condense the magic into a crystal form, or condense it into a crystal we bring in?

Which was another thing we needed to know: What crystal will do? I suppose we can pick one up from Mewni if we ever decide to go there for armor.

Also

>>1434545
I'd assume we're well-rested. Let's try to clean the room up.

Summon some small undead to help out.

If we ever see Hekapoo again, let's keep working on getting on her good side. She's into us, but knows the whole business with being a God and all associating with mortals.
>>
>>1434901
this is a very dark idea but could we force her skeleton out while she's still alive?
>>
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>>1434901
>>
>>1434912
>spoiler

that never stopped the greek gods
>>
>>1434914
2 S P O O P
S
P
O
O
P

Spoop levels:
0 [ ____ Scary _____ Limit of] acceptability ___
###########################################################################
>>
>>1434914
>Not controlling her skeleton and making her do embarrassing things
>Notforcing her to blow hobobro while we restrain Marco and make him watch
>>
>>1434943
Rude dude, no thanks.
>>
>>1434953
C'mon man, hobro deserves some princessucc.
>>
>>1434966
Hekapoo stop shitposting on 4chan.
>>
>>1434966
No hes going to be apart of our skeleton jazz band
>>
>>1434943
that is also a really good idea and the only thing they can do is watch with horror how they cant control their body and scream.
>>
>>1434545
Wait, SHIT

If Star has the notion of a brain in her skull, she DEFINITELY knows we're up to something if we're hanging around with Hekapoo. Especially with her being "casual friends" with Anon like in the Headbook profile picture.

We're gonna be unable to avoid Star, she's bound to seek us out now. Maybe not immediately, but next time she has the opportunity to like at school.
>>
>>1435663
So? Clearly we just bumped into her clone one day while shopping. One thing lead to another and you ended up becoming friends.

No weird magical shenanigans here, no sir.
>>
>>1435663
Simple solution to her asking to many questions.
>"Oh Heckapoo? I met her in the forest of Nunya."
>"Nunya?"
>"NUNYA FUCKIN' BUSINESS!"

The end.
>>
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>>1435701
>>1435705
Right, same thing with the mutant arm,Ludo kidnapping Anon, the book with the face, and Jackie and Janna talking about the literal magic Anon casted and heal a deep knife wound using human blood all being a huge coincidence.

She's going to come to us and ask what's going on. I agree we shouldn't tell her shit, but she's going to try and interfere with our plans and see just what we're doing.
>>
>>1435701
I really don't think we should be that hostiles towards star. We really don't need her as an enemy right now, specially since she can instagib us if things get serious. I know we kinda hate her, but at this particular moment its not worth to antagonize her. yet.
>>
Wait, 3 whole minutes passed? If this is linear, that means 6 years passed in the Hekadimension.
>>1435663
We can always answer sarcastically, and then guilt trip her if she gets mad or impatient.
>>
>>1436166
Shit, we lost our new /fit/ body didn't we? I forgot about that happening.
>>
>>1436183
but 6 years of doing the same thing over and over will stick as muscular memory. if we stick to justin and his gym pals and we do whatever we were doing in the hekadimension, we should regain our toned body soon.
>>
>>1436193
I think muscle memory would go the same way as the muscles. If we put points into physical stats I'd see us keeping them.
>>
What do you guys think of Jackie as a character?
I always liked her design, and her personality is thay of a very understanding and cool minded person that could alway get down with the get down. That being said besides being emotional support for Marco's development she dosen't have much else too her in the show.
Here in the quest, I feel Quest has done a better job hinting at some of Jackie's flaws such as her being pretty self-conscious, and her chill additude being set up to hide some social anxiety cause by some old trauma.
What do you guys think of this?

Tl;dr What to yall niggas think of Jackie and where do you think Quest will take here character?
>>
Okay guys, so we just ended monday night, and we have the big game on friday.
So, that leaves tuesday, wednesday, and thursday.
I propose we focus on studying anatomy on tuesday, focus on studying swamp drakes on wednesday, and focus on increasing social links on thursday.
How does that sound?
>>
>>1436247
I like that we've seen a bit behind her coolgirl exterior, even if it's been for fart jokes. She would do ell at tying us to our humanity by being our only down to earth friend, as opposed to Janna who will send us ass over head into eldritch wiz biz and stinkin' thinkin'.

As long as she doesn't turn out to be a goddamn mermaid princess I'm fine.
>>
>>1436252
>not wanting mermaid waifu
Shit taste famalama
>>
>>1436261
Mermaids are low tier my dude.
Any other aquatic monster origin would be better than someone with a fish tail for legs.
>>
>>1436265
>not wanting to rub your dick against Jackies scales
>>
>>1436249
I think we should go ahead and steal that eye thing on one of those days. I don't think we need to study anatomy anymore, not with all the skeletons we raised and how we can flesh mold them.
>>
>>1436265
woah woah woah. mermaids are the succubus of the sea. What can be better than that? No, really. My knowledge in acuatic mythology is lacking.
>>
>>1436252
I really like the idea of jackie a mermaid princess that wants to have a normal life, and janna, the human that wants to have epic adventures
>>
>>1436353
Selkie
Water Elemental
Creature from the Black Lagoon
Scylla(either old greek version or monstergirl version)
Naiad
Kelpie
Bunyip
Kappa
Undine

To name a few.
>>
>>1436369
Scylla go and pls stay go.
>>
>>1436371
No.
>>
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>wanting a fish
>not wanting a bug
Pretty shit taste I'm seeing here so far.
>>
>>1436383
If we had a better bug option I'd be all for it.

>>1436357
>mermaid princess who wants to be normal

>not the fishy descendant of an aquatic elder god who left the cult she was born into to learn about the humans and decided she wants to be one of them
>she still hears the voice, telling her it's all for naught
>but she still tries because she genuinely likes humanity
>also because screw you grandad
>>
>>1436386
that sounds really good as well.
>>
>>1436386
>better than perfection
I don't understand?
>>
>>1436401
>Star Butterfly
>Perfection
pick ONE
>>
>>1436401
Anon you better be pretending to be retarded otherwise, well, I'm sorry.
>>
>>1436369
>Undine
>Water Elemental
These are not the same?
>>
>>1436436
Meant to remove water elemental after putting undine in.
>>
>>1436369
>kelpie
>Better than the "succubus of the sea"

Back to >>/mlp/ you go

I'm just shitposting; those things are fucking terrifying. Dragging people underwater to drown while they're completely stuck on the horse, then eating their waterlogged corpse is spooky as all hell.

>>1436383
True patricians realize that having an heir with multiple females is the best taste, and that the only "shit-tier" female is the one that can't crossbreed with Anon's maximum autismo genes to add to his empire of spaghetti-dropping children.
>>
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SESSION START


>You are Anon
>You have been an adventure for about 3 earthly days
>You are already level 6
>You can already tell about a decade has been shaved off your life
>It's been pretty lit
>You've made new friends
>Found some enemies
>Crushed those enemies
>Felt their organs squish in your finger-AH!
>AH! Bad thoughts bad thoughts

>You are in your room
>After receiving a set of magic scissors from your new...pal?
>Guide?
>Hekapoo
>A look around tells you how dumb it was to summon a demon goddess into your house
>The carpet is crunchy black debris
>Your bed is a burnt toaster strudel that somehow still has chip crumbs in it
>The only thing that survived was your craptop
>Because you put it into your wall stash
>How has mom not woken up?
>Oh right
>The Lithium
>You look down at yourself
>Your clothes, the same ones you wore for 8 whole months in Hekapoo's world
>3 minutes earth time
>Are now threads hanging off of you
>Wait
>No
>A: "NOOOOooo!"
>Your sick training abs
>They're gone
>Your three inches of new height
>Vanished
>A: "Hekapoo, you dick!"
>You rip a hole into the air with your new blades
>Through this portal you see Hekapoo's red hair and horns
>A: "HEKAPOO, YOU'RE A HEKAJERRRRK!"
>She jumps
>Turns
>She's nude
>WHACK!
>You've been nose-punched yet again
>Interdimensionally punked
>Darkness
>...

>EHHHHHHHHHH
>What the hell is-
>EEEEHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
>Holy shit your ala-
>EEEEEEEEEEHHHHH
>CRUNCH!
>You're not sure wether you or Muscles just destroyed your Slime-Time clock but you don't regret it
>It was an antique but...you weren't gonna have kids to pass it on to anyways
>Your phone bleeps
>TEXT MESSAGE FROM JACKIE
>It's an image of the inside of her room
>You can see her feet popping out of the end of her covers
>Her toenails are sea-green
>Das...Das pretty fuckin' kawaii there, senpai
>J: "Hey, madman u up?"
>You know she's probably still worried about you
>Hell, last time you spoke a Sea troll nearly ate everyone at the board walk
>You got stabbed
>Good times

>You are Anon
>You're up on time for once
>You have a whole new day of school ahead, and a football game on Friday


WHAT DO!?

Anon's character sheet

https://pastebin.com/UHYYajzX
>>
>>1436785
420 blazed my room.

Why the feet pic?
>>
>>1436785
"Hey Jackie."
>>
>>1436785
Ask her to post more feet.
>>
>>1436785
Ask why the feet pic. And go to school.

Try to clean your room after you get back too.
>>
>>1436785
Well, room is fucked
>Hey Jackie how are ya?
>>
>>1436785
Answer Jackie.
Get Breakfast.
Talk to Mom if possible (don't wanna have her panic if she enters our room [which I don't think she does])
Get your things and prepare for school.
>>
>>1436794
She knows what we like.
>>
>>1436785
>text to Jackie while getting ready for the day.
>>
>>1436799
This
>All these feet questions
Footfags leave
>>
>>1436785
Have a breakfeast then go to school.
>>
>>1436785
TIME! FOR OUR SCISSORS! Let's portal to school as a true test run. Ignoring the heckapeak we just did.
>>
>>1436816
this with texting jackie
>>
>>1436816
In all seriousness this.
>>
>>1436799
this
>>
>>1436785
Text her back or reply on headbook. Let's go to school today, leave a bunch of skeletons and little minions to clean up H-poo's mess.
>>
>>1436785
>Text back
>A: "yeah"
>>
>>1436785
>>1436816
We should try portaling to school after >>1436808
>>
>>1436785
"Hey, want to see something cool?"
Use scissors to get to Jackie's room
>>
>>1436857
Dude, we just learned the hard way what happens when you portal into a girls room.
>>
>>1436857
never mind THIS
>>
>>1436857>>1436861
What if she's naked like Hekapoo? Do you not know what privacy is?
>>
>>1436816
Actually, yeah. Let's test it.

Try teleporting somewhere discreet; behind the school or in one of the bathrooms.
>>
>>1436857
We definitley should do this
>>
>>1436811

You know what? >>1436857 instead.
>>
>>1436857
ALTERNATE VERSION: appear on her front door, and KNOCK.
>>
>>1436857
Every time I think my vote is set somebody comes along and gives an even better suggestion.

THIS
>>
>>1436857
This but just stick your had through with a thumbs up. Let's not invade her home at 5 AM.
>>
>>1436785
use scissors to ding dong ditch Marco
>>
>>1436869
Wait no that would be creepy.
Just ask her if she's decent first.
>>
>>1436869
Better option.

Jackie may be infatuated with Anon, but definitely not ready for a sudden portal into her room. Either knock on her door or ask if we can teleport there, like >>1436879 says.
>>
>>1436874
This
>>
>>1436874
this is better, we probably shouldn't give her a heart attack
>>
>>1436863
Why do you think I wrote this action in?
>>
>Putting any of your extremities inside someone else's private property without previously obtaining their explicit consent.
>>
Do all you people really want to see Jackie before she's gotten ready!? Do you really want the illusion of her perfect face ruined?!
>>
>>1436891
Fine, let's just ASK her if we can teleport to her room then.
>>
>>1436891
Yes.
>>
>>1436874
Yeah, this is safer
>Inb4 she screams at the creepy monster hand poking into her room and her dad comes out with a shotgun
>>
>Think about as fast as you can after getting feet pics from one of your grill friends
>You grab a hunk of burnt bed
>Still smoking
>You turn on your cam
>Jackie gets a text notification
>VIDEO MESSAGE FROM ANON
>You do a panorama shot of your burnt ass walls
>Then flip the camera to selfie mode
>You puff on the smouldering wood hunk like it's a fat hog-leg doobie
>A: "Suh dude."
>You push out in your best cancer vine meme accent
>You leave a video caption reading "Memes too fire, burnt mah house down."
>You then rush downstairs for some toast
>Mom is at the table
>Nursing a sweet tea
>Wow
>Oklahoma much, Mom?
>M: "Mm morning."
>A: "Hey. Gotta get breakfast."
>M: "It's made. Get it out of the fridge."
>What
>Made?
>Mom MADE breakfast?
>She doesn't coo-
>You open the fridge to find your Mom has cooked
>Peeling back the tin foil you find a plate of bacon, eggs and a single slice of toast
>Buttered
>Both sides
>Aw fuckin' yissss
>You snatch that shit and start scarfing
>Mom looks you over, seeming more aware than usual
>M: "What hit you last night?"
>You pause
>Egg drips out of your mouth
>You look like hot shit off the skiddle
>...and for once your mom seems to give a shit
>A: "I-"
>A ringtone splits your pause for thought
>You reach for your phone
>Nothing
>You look up to see Mom on HER phone
>Shit
>It must be Da-
>M: "Hey, you! Calling back already?"
>That is absolutely not dad
>Mom never answers the first time dad calls
>Now you need answers
>Mom can tell from the look on your stuffed face you want answers
>That's probably why she gets up and shimmies back upstairs to her room
>Guess you get your secrets
>...and she gets hers
>What the hell?
>After finishing the breakfast you snatch your backpack, gently putting the bound together pages of THE BOOK in your front pouch
>You don't plan on skipping today
>Although you sure have bigger things going on than school
>You run to the laundry room and grab one of your seventeen matching shirt and jackets
>God damn you need some fashion sense
>Then, you take off out the door
>Down the street
>Fuck an' toothbrush
>You look down at your phone
>6 text message from Jackie
>J: "lol"
>J: "w8..."
>J: "WHAT THE H!?"
>J: "ANON! IS THAT REALLY UR HOUSE?!"
>J: "DUde! You look crispy, my guy!"
>J: "Haha, at least you're not bleeding IG!"
>A nearby city bus comes rolling by
>It's rims sparkle in the early morning sun
>That breeze comes back
>Is the air getting fresher?
>You eye the bus
>All shiny and chrome...

https://youtu.be/gEe6n6U9NPk

>Reaching out, you hitch a ride
>Hell yeah
>Express lane
>On the back of your ride you suddenly feel a hand
>Bitch don't touch me-
>???: "DIRT!"
>A: "AAAH- Oh Holy shit!"
>It's the hobo
>From the creek
>Also riding the bus
>For free
>M'urica


What do?


>You snatch
>>
>>1436911
BROTHERS
>>
>>1436911
BROTHERS
>>
>>1436911
>"Dirt Brother! We ride eternal!"
>>
>>1436911
Speak with Dirt Brother.
We need them brownie points with the city's hobomunity.
>>
>>1436911
Yo hobro! Why you on the bus? Just hitching a ride?
>>
>>1436911
BRO WILL THIS RIDE WE CALL LIFE WILL EVER END
>>
>>1436911
DIRT BROTHERS FOR LIFE
>>
>>1436911
>"BROTHERRRRRRS!!!"
>>
>>1436911
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zI7cNhTIOEI
>>
>>1436911
Time to catch up with DIRT BROTHER

I wonder if he knows how to read ancient nonsense text.
>>
>>1436911
Dirt Brofist
>>
>>1436911
Hey bro whats up!
>>
test
>>
>No pause
>No hesitation
>You rear back your head
>There is only one answer to the call of DIRT
>A: "BBBBROOTHERSSSS!"
>He howls into the sky as you scream
>You both laugh like drunken idiots
>You nearly fall off
>He catches your backpack strap and pulls you up
>Not even afraid of a losing all his skin on the pavement
>Cool guy
>His thoughts meander out of his head at you
>Entirely open
>All Jazz
>Weird
>You decide to hit up this denizen of the berg for a second
>A: "Hey, man you doing ok?"
>???: "Doin' fine, kid. The sun's out. All the restaurants are gonna take the locks of their dumpsters. Tonight..."
>>
>>1436992
[Worried]
>>
>>1437001
Dirt Bro best bro
>>
>A: "-and I'm not afraid of you making sexual advances on me, grown homeless man."
>Another shared chuckle
>A police car coasts near the back of the bus
> ???: "Ah shit. This guy never lets up. Last three days he's been pullin' the bus over cause I'm back here. Asshole."
>>
>>1437010
Dirt bro confirmed for real cool bro.
>>
>>1437001
>>1437016

Please stand by while Quest figures out why 4chan hates this reply

bless
>>
>>1437021
Rip Quest. Press F to pay respects.
>>
>>1437021
F
>>
>>1437001
>>1437016
>>1437021

This special edition of "DIRT BROTHERS" is brought to you by Pastebin! and Cummies! The snack all the little children love.

https://pastebin.com/Yn2PjSDi
>>
>>1437032
>Save you and Dirtbro by portaling to school (reveal scissors)
>>
>>1437021
We don't?
>>
>>1437032
>https://pastebin.com/Yn2PjSDi
>>Save you and Dirtbro by portaling to school (reveal scissors)

Fuck Da Police and it'd come out sooner rather than later anyway.
>>
>>1437032
>https://pastebin.com/Yn2PjSDi

BULLY COP
>>
>>1437032
Guy's, let's have some fun and fuck with the cop?
>>
>>1437032
>Time to save Dirtbro, Scissors Style.
>>
>>1437032
>"Fuck with the police"

How we do that?
>>
>>1437032
Escape to school with our Dirt Brother using our scissors
>>
>>1437032
>Save Dirtbro
>>
>>1437032
>Save you and Dirtbro by portaling to school (reveal scissors)
Ain't no time for games, gotta save our dirtbro
>>
>>1437032
>Fuck with cop
Why not?
>>
>>1437032
Scissors
>>
It is time...to count!
Ready your dice!
>>
>>1437032
>Fuck with the cop
>>
>>1437032
Use scissors to make a clean getaway, take Dirt Brother with you.
>>
>>1437032
Scissors gateaway.
>>
New thread?
>>
>>1437104
We haven't hit image limit yet.
>>
>>1437129
But we are reaching a bullshit limit.
>>
>>1437129
Quest is having technical issues
>>
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New thread!

>>1437137




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