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/qst/ - Quests

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Previous thread: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/qstarchive/1812398/

Quick recap: You are a boy named Donald Thomas. Your chat handle is crackingLucidity. Valve has just released a new game, a game called Sburb. You are playing it with one of your friends, and are having a bit of trouble with it. For one thing, it seems she can now manipulate your environment? What? How the fuck even?
And she recently left her computer, to go check with her MOM to see if it was safe to remain at home, as she had been hit with some earthquakes.
Normally, you would be quite concerned for her safety, but you have some pressing concerns of your own to deal with. Like, for example, the weird machines and an odd hole-punched captchalogue card that she dropped into your backyard.
You managed to open one of the machines, the "cruxtruder", and out popped a screeching flying ball that is just zooming around at random. The machine has a valve on it, that you presume will do something if you turn it. It also has a glass screen with some numbers on it.


And it's ticking down.
You have the feeling that you should hurry for some reason.


So, with that in mind, what now? You have a weird ball flying around, an unturned valve, and two machines that you have yet to make any progress with. Also, the pre-punched card tucked away in your REEL MODUS.
Give the... thing... A single gentle pap, and get on with it.

A timer, how ominous.

Time to stop doing random science.

Actual science go!

You have a punch card, find somewhere to stick it.
Scratch that. Dont be a dumb, your on a timer.

Spin the wheel, be ready to grab whatever comes out.
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Well. That was uneventful. Nothing happened. It felt a little odd though, like... fuzzy. Or something. And sharp, somehow. You don't know.

Alright. Punchcard. You take it out and look about. Surely there must be a way to use it?
You try to take out whatever's in the card. You fail, of course. The holes make it worthless.
Hmm. The totem lathe has a slot though. and it IS the perfect size for it...

You pop it in. Nothing happens.
Time for the power of the INTERNET! You google "lathe".

Hm. Seems a lathe is a machine that's usually is used for carving wood.
You already know what a totem is, but you also look it up.

"a natural object or animal believed by a particular society to have spiritual significance and adopted by it as an emblem."

Uh. Alright. that's actually different from what you thought. Turns out that "totem" and "totem pole" are different things. Who knew!

So this machine carves natural objects of spiritual significance? Or perhaps it did refer more towards totem poles...


Ahhh fuck what are you doing? You should probably be hurrying.
You grab the valve and-
Fall on your ass. On account of the fact that the world just started shaking and you hear a loud sound off in the distance.
You. Uh. Hope that that wasn't anything important.
You get back up and turn the valve.

Out pops... a weird blue cylinder?
Well, you think you know what to do with this. Like the captchalogue card, it's the exact right shape.
Into the lathe it goes!
The machine flares to life! The arm of the machine moves, and the cylinder starts spinning...

A few seconds later, the cylinder has been carved. Yay? You're at least 80% sure that you just made progress.
But that took a bit of time. You were rushing, so it didn't take *that* long, but the clock is now at 02:09.
So. What to do with it? Only one machine left. The alchemiter is by FAR the oddest looking one, with no obvious function. You can't even tell what it's a portmanteau of, like... "alchemy" is probably one, but "iter", to your knowledge, isn't a word.

Oh. And it seems the floating orb went off somewhere. You hope it wasn't important...

You wonder how much you should be worried about how the ground still feels like it's shaking a bit.
Use your sexy brain to put together the timer, th reality warping video game, and the earthquakes you genius you.

say "fraggle rock on a biscuit"

Put that totem onto the totem sized pedestal of the ALCHEMITER. Appreciate the beautiful alien science magic.

See if TC is back yet. If so pester her.

If she is not start Redditing and tell everyone what you figured out, you might be able to save someone else.
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What. That sentence read like something from SBaHJ.
And why would you say that exactly?

You take a moment to calm yourself. The stress must be making you lose it or something.
It is but a moment of course, you are on a timer after all. But you allow yourself a few seconds to close your eyes, tilt your head back, and feel the warmth of the sun on your face.
It's not your birthday, or any day special at all really. Yet nonetheless, it FEELS special. It feels like today has made very little sense so far, and you can practically feel your mind shuttering at the thought of all the blatantly reality-breaking shit you've seen within the first ten fucking minutes or so of you having started playing this fucking game.
You take a deep breath. For some inexplicable reason, you feel like quoting poetry. Too bad you can't think of any poems relevant in the slightest to your present situation.
You open your eyes, and stare at the sky. Ah, what a beautiful image. The blue of the sky, the white of the clouds, the red of the meteor...

...Oh look, you thought of a quote.


Yes. You are 100% sure Abraham Lincoln said that. Not you, just a second ago, loudly as you stare at your imminent doom, streaking through the sky.
You have feeling that it's going to be a confusing day.
And possibly a very short one, if you don't do something soon. You have the sneaking suspicion you know why you've been feeling earthquakes and hearing loud noises.

You take the carved cylinder, and place it on the smaller pedestal. The arm of the alchemiter scans it, and on the larger platform...
You are now staring at an ornate electric-blue gift box. Covered in duct tape and bows and wrapping paper and all kinds of shit that really just makes it harder to open.

00:30, reads the timer.

Roll 3D10. Or describe how you wish to open the box, and if your idea is good enough you will get a bonus, or simply open it regardless of what you rolled.
Rolled 4, 3, 1 = 8 (3d10)

Fuckin' sai that lid right the fuck off.
1 + 2 LUCK

Yeah, you kind of just take off the hard to remove stuff with your sai's. It's not even a big deal. You find yourself wondering if it was even necessary to have checks for it?
You take the now unwrapped box.
You open it.


The sky is a multicolored swirl. The ground looks fake, painted on. Everything is colored way too vividly. In the distance, you see sculptures, odd isometric floating shapes, and rainbow lakes. The sky is pouring the most beautiful rain you've ever seen upon your poor confused head. Each drop a small mallet of what the fuck upon your overtaxed noggin.
You, and your house, appear to have been teleported.

You... YOU...
You guess this is good?
I mean. You don't have a flaming ball of FUCK YOU aimed at your house anymore. So that's good.
What is slightly less good is that you have no idea what to do next.

As good an idea as any.
You take out your cell phone. Huh, seems you still have internet connection at least. Unfortunately, TC has yet to come back. You hope she's okay. You shoot her a quick message letting her know what's happening.

Oh. But would you look at that? One of your other chums sent you a message!

---toasterBoaster(TB) began pestering crackingLucidity(CL) at ??:??---

TB: HELLO my man! Good MORNING! Hows your day been treating you so far?
TB: Yo, I can see you online! Why you ignoring me bro!
TB: I mean, I see you're in Sburb or whatever right now, but the game can't be THAT distracting right?
CL: I need you to check the news.
TB: ...What?
CL: Right now.
TB: UHH... Okay!
TB: Okay I
CL: Let me guess. Meteors?
CL: Yeah. Good question. I think it's because of Sburb.
CL: Yeah, me and TC started playing a bit ago. She left because she felt earthquakes. Guess we know what was causing that now...
CL: I hope she didn't leave her house or anything, because this game might be our only hope for survival.
CL: After I got far enough in it, it teleported me to a place that seems... Safe-ish.
TB: So the the game is MAGIC?
CL: No. Just because we don't understand something doesn't mean it's magical.
TB: Aww...
CL: But you should probably start playing. Download the game and select "Client Player". I think that will let you join.
TB: UGG! What the H**L man... This is so weird. Am I just having a weird dream or something?
CL: No.
TB: Dang it. Alright, I'm going to download it then I guess!
CL: While you do that, I'm going to take a look around. This place is weird.

You put your phone back in it's captchalogue card.
Alright. Well. What now? You have a LOT of things you could do now that you don't seem to be in immediate danger. What now?
Tell our boi TB about that whole telportation bidnizz. The totem, alchemizing, captchalogue cards and the works then go see where dad got off to. If we can't find him grap some cool adventure gear/inventions.
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Well. You really shouldn't put it off any longer. Your dad, odd as he may be, can probably help you with all this. You go into your house, and head towards the basement.
You turn your head. And are greeted by a giant glowing blue and white butterfly.
You stumble back, letting out a squeal of pure terror.

BUTTERFLYSPRITE: Greetings, murderer.
CL: The fuck?
BUTTERFLYSPRITE: Oh, confused? Good. You're going to be flapping that way for a WHILE.
CL: Flapping?
BUTTERFLYSPRITE: Feeling. It's a pun you dunce. Because butterflies. This isn't rocket science.
CL: Who are you and why are you in my house?
BUTTERFLYSPRITE: Oh, you don't recognise me? Well, to be fair, the last times you saw me I either looked far more circular, or was dead.
CL: What?
BUTTERFLYSPRITE: Fine. I was your kernelsprite, and now I've been prototyped.
CL: What?
BUTTERFLYSPRITE: Boy, you sure do ask a lot of questions.
BUTTERFLYSPRITE: But you have done little to endear yourself to me. Murderer. So why should I answer?
CL: Okay, so I think you may have me mixed up with someone else. I have never killed anyone, nor do I have the slightest inclination to do so.
BUTTERFLYSPRITE: No. I know you killed me. You probably don't remember. After all, BUG LIVES DON'T MATTER! *FLAP* *FLAP*
CL: ...Oh are you serious right now.
BUTTERFLYSPRITE: Nah, not really. I'm just flappin with you. I mean, I wasn't even really aware of my own existence when you did it.
CL: So. You... are one of the butterflies from my collection?
BUTTERFLYSPRITE: Actually, I'm an amalgamation of all of them, plus your sprite.
CL: Sprite?
BUTTERFLYSPRITE: Weird flying seizure-inducing ball that came out of the cruxtruder.
CL: Oh!
CL: Wait what?
BUTTERFLYSPRITE: Anyway, I'm supposed to be your guide through this game. So I can tell you right now, that looking for your father is a waste of time at the moment.
BUTTERFLYSPRITE: Bug i'm not going to just tell you what you need to do.
BUTTERFLYSPRITE: Flutter it out yourself.
CL: What?

And with that, the sprite phases through the wall to go and do who knows what.
What just happened.
You sit down, and resolve to just talk to your friends for now. Process the fact that you just talked to sapient non-human life later. You need time to calm down. TB is probably done, or almost done installing the game. You should go talk him through the process.

But hey, that's boring. Why talk someone through the process when you just went through it yourself? For now, let's shift to a more interesting perspective...

Pick one:
Be TC.
Be TB.
Be someone else.
>Be TC.
Is TC back? If so we need to unload this smelly situation all over them. If not then let's be TC.
you roll a 20 on perception and immidiately spot where the butterfly went off to
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You are now TC.

You are a 13 year old girl with brown hair, pigtails, freckles, and bright grey eyes! You are in your BEDROOM. It's pretty sparse, but that's fine! You wouldn't want to be sinful and greedy and such, so you make sure not to accumulate useless things like posters or toys. Nope! Books are where it's at. You also have a computer of course. Aside from that, you have a bed, dresser, closet, and other necessities.
If asked to describe yourself, you would say...

Your pretty WEAK (1 MANGRIT). But that's fine, a proper lady doesn't need to be strong.

You are pretty HEALTHY (3 GEL VISCOSITY) due to your STRICT DIET that makes sure you get just the right amount of fruit and vegetables!

You also like to think you're decently LUCKY (3 LUCK) But not amazingly so. You generally get through the day without tripping over anything.

You are also pretty SMART (3 MIND). Some of your friends seem to disagree with you on that, but just because you know different stuff than them doesn't mean your knowledge is any less useful!

For example, you have a great deal of knowledge about RELIGION! Boy, you sure do love religion! The religion you follow is called MAYAKISM, and you like to think of yourself as one of its most DEVOUT FOLLOWERS! Not that your bragging of course, you actually feel really BAD for all the people who have yet to see the TRUTH yet. As such, you have taken it upon yourself to CONVERT your friends to mayakism, to SAVE them from going to HELL. You have to be pretty SUBTLE about it though. From what you've seen, people don't really appreciate it when you go on and on in a RANT trying to convince them, so you mostly just keep it down to the occasional reference, hoping one of your friends will get curious and come to YOU rather than the other way around.

Other than that, you DON'T HAVE MANY INTERESTS. But that's fine. You don't really need anything else!

One other thing you like, though you wouldn't call it one of your "interests" per say, but you enjoy VIDEO GAMES from time to time. Your MOM was against it at first, but after seeing that it was something that brought you closer to your friends, she let you start gaming. You aren't really very GOOD at games, but you're still learning.

Speaking of video games, this one is pretty weird so far! Perhaps it's some kind of sign from god? I mean, the game seems to be BASICALLY MAGIC, so it probably is!

But you can't play anymore right now, you just felt your first earthquake! And you second! And your third! And it's still happening! As such, you have decided to go get your MOM in the hopes that she will know what to do!

But before that, you need a name.
What would that name be?
Princess Poopypanties.

Abigail McKraken.
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Hey now, no need to be rude!

Anyway, your name is ABIGAIL MCKRAKEN! As previously stated, you should really go find your mom.
You get up, and head down the hallway, admiring the RELIGIOUS SYMBOLS lining the walls as you do so.
You emerge out into the living room. The T.V is on, mom must have left it on by mistake.
...It's an emergency broadcast. Meteors appear to be falling to earth, spontaneously appearing from nothingness in space.
That's. Worrisome.
But you have faith that the lord will protect you, and those you hold dear.
Still, probably best to see what you mom thinks of the situation. She always knows best!
You spend about five minutes or so searching the house for her. You can't seem to find her though.
Oh dang it. Today is grocery day isn't it? Dang it. She probably isn't even here.

You. Uh. Don't really know what to do now?
Take your phone out of your SCRIPTURE SPECUBUS, with the appropriate quote, and call your MOM.
I'll back this, but also check on our other contacts and peak outside to see if there's a meteor coming our way.

Also grab a religious icon for comfort.

2 Thessalonians 2:15
"So then, brethren, stand firm and hold to the traditions which you were taught, whether by word of mouth or by letter from us."

You grab your mighty war Cross. Suitable for dramatic posing, bearing the burden of your faith, and smashing heretics. (not that you would ever do that, you love all religions)
Oh yeah! Your mom should have her phone with her.

You recite a verse from the HOLY BOOK OF MAYAKISM also known as the "Chazos".

"And so, they waved for them, and they did not respond, and so they called for them, and they did not respond, and so they screamed for them, and they did not respond, and so they bled for them, and they bled and screamed and called and waved. But they did not respond."

...Yeah, that's close enough. It conveys the idea of "communication" at any rate. So it's enough to get your phone out of your SCRIPTURE MODUS.

...Well, okay, it's actually a QUOTE MODUS, but nobody seems to have made a scripture modus for mayakism yet, so it's the best you can do.





She's not picking up. Dang it.

Oh, the pesterchum app is trying to get your attention.

--- wonderBlunder(WB) began pestering twinklingConciousness(TC) at ??:?? ---

WB: heyheyhey
WB: are you there
TC: Yeah, but I cant talk!!!
WB: yeah i know
WB: so did you see CLs message about what to do
TC: No???
TC: Oh wait here it is.

---crackingLucidity(CL) began pestering his entire friends list at ??:??---

CL: Meteors are destroying the world. If you need proof look outside at the sky. Or turn your TV to a news channel.
CL: This is NOT a prank or drill or anything of the sort.
CL: Thankfully, we have been provided a way out.
CL: The game that was released a bit ago on steam known as "Sburb" has reality-warping capabilities that seem to provide a way to escape.

(CL then ranted on for a bit about how to enter the game)

CL: That should be all the important stuff. Let me know if you all find anything else out.

--- crackingLucidity(CL) stopped pestering his entire friends list at ??:?? ---

TC: Oh my god!
WB: yeah
WB: so he said he had entered the game already and you were his server
WB: so i guess ill be your server player so you can enter
WB: i guess that tb will be my server
TC: But my mom isnt home! I need to wait for her to get back!!!
WB: she might be back by the time we get everything set up
TC: I guess...

You begin following the instructions, and quickly find yourself with your own glowing orb that flies off somewhere. Along with your very own entry item.
A lock.
You... do not have a key.
What do you do with the lock? And also, do you wait for your mother to get back?
The time on the cruxtruder reads 06:66. Because of course it does.
Hopefully thats a good omen in Mayakism.

Ask WB if she can make a key?

Try random keys around the house?

If that doesn't work, try to find that sprite thing, maybe it knows what to do.

(eat the lock)
666 being the good omen. Hopefully.
Silly girl, why would you need a key? That is clearly a combination lock. Flip the card over, input the numbers in the back as the combo. Or try 666, if you like.
>Wait until 0:30 for mom
>voting Flailkind Strife Modus
Also find some chain. Chain with a lock at the end is clearly a superior flail to that knotted sock.
You are quite correct. Disregard my earlier key hunting, its combination time.
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You knew that.


Ah... Actually, that would be the number of SACRIFICE. It's usually part of rituals that involve a LOT of blood. Not exactly a BAD omen by any means, but GOOD is stretching it a bit.

Still, you try the number.

After waiting for your mom to get home anyway.
Boy, she sure is taking a while...
You try calling again.
She isn't picking up.
It's at 00:30, but surely she's almost home.

You slide the last number into place. You think you get it now.
Boy, this is a pretty big sacrifice to make.



You're crying a little too much to take in the sights right now. You think you see some factories or something. You don't know.
Perhaps you need some alone time.

So with that in mind, pick one:
Be Donald (CL).
Be TB.
Be WB.
Be Someone else.
Silly girl, cease this useless waste of precious bodily fluids. There wasn't even any blood involved in that SACRIFICE.

>Be WB
...hugs* TC.

she is in a better place now


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You are now a young boy, known on the internet as WB.
You are perfectly average in terms of strength and sturdiness (3 MANGRIT) (3 GEL VISCOSITY), you are a bit above average in terms of your mental capabilities (4 MIND), and you are rather UNLUCKY (0 LUCK). You like math and studying and horror movies you guess.

But none of that's important right now.
Right now, what's important is surviving the meteors heading toward you planet.

You have just finished helping Abigail enter the game. Seems like her mom didn't make it in time.
Fuck. Shit. You don't know what to do.
Uhh. Damn. you can't just leave her like this. She had a bunch of religious looking stuff in her house, so maybe...

WB: im sorry
WB: shes in a better place now

Yeah, that was probably comforting. You hope.
...Dang it. That's all you can think of. She isn't answering right now anyway.

Your really glad that your STEPDAD is home right now. And with a bum leg at that, so he won't be going anywhere at least. You don't need to worry about him. And you don't really have any other family members, none that you're close to anyway.

You ponder what to do next. You guess you should call someone up to be your server player. But who's left to pick from...?

Let's see. If you understand everything so far, the order of connection so far is something like:
WB → Abigail(TC) → Donald(CL) → TB →

So it seems that TB is available. Other than him, you have three options.
You could ask DD to be your server player. Shes pretty nice.
You could ask RM. He is... significantly less nice.
Or you can go with FM. You don't really know much about her.

So that's four options. TB, DD, RM, or FM.
You should probably pick one.

Oh. And like. A name, also. That's still a thing you need to do.

Wild card baby! Roll those dice, and get snake eyes!

Wastepaper Basket

Nickolas Frayer.
But yes. waltzingBrushfire is the handle of someone who likes to dance, get the help from the radio girl.
>Nickolas works for me.

...What? Your username is wonderBlunder, not waltzingBrushfire. You saw that back at >>1927455.
Though, that name is actually pretty cool. But it would just confuse everyone if you changed it now.
Your real name, of course, is Nicholas Frayer.

--- wonderBlunder(WB) began pestering flyingMoocow(FM) at ??:?? ---

WB: hey i need you to be my server player
FM: Sure thing broski!
FM: But hey can you like maybe be my server too?
WB: no im already abigails server
FM: Shit dawg, that's not good.
WB: tb, dd, or rm are still available to be servers i think
FM: Thanks!

--- flyingMoocow(FM) stopped pestering wonderBlunder(WB) at ??:?? ---

Oh come on.

--- wonderBlunder(WB) began pestering flyingMoocow(FM) at ??:?? ---

WB: hey why did you disconnect
WB: you said you would be my server player
FM: Oh whoops sorry man.
FM: Uhh, anyway.
FM: Let me just figure out how to set this up...

...Time passes. You and her get connected. Everything is set up pretty quick.
All you need to do now is activate your entry item.

It looks like... a sword, broken into pieces, and a welding torch?
What do you do with these?
Well I'd melt it into slag. Swords into plowshares right? Is that what that means?

Though if Peter Jackson has taught me anything it needs to be reforged. though maybe some place else... where you won't light the carpet or desk on fire trying to glue it together.

Would your stepdad have a workshop?
rejoin the sword so that it is whole

You don't really have a workshop or anything. But your bathroom floor is made of tile, that's fireproof, right?
You put it back together.
This is...
Challenging. You don't think you've ever actually welded anything before.
By the end, it actually kinda looks like shit. Parts of it have melted off, some of the pieces didn't really fit right, and you think you may have accidentally used part of the handle in the blade (it's kind of hard to tell, its all the same color and material and stuff, so you need to figure it out based on the shape alone).

But it is, in fact, all one peice now.


Well. This place sure is shiny. Yet... oddly dark? Hm.


Well. You guess you can just. Go and explore now. If you want.
Or you could be someone else, you guess.

Be Donald. (CL)
Be Abigail. (TC)
Keep being yourself. (WB)
Be TB.
Be FM.
Be DD.
Be RM.
You Keep Being You. Self esteem is important.
Heh. Fag.
Im sorry, the dark gods have my family, send help.

Also keep yourself going, haven't heard from your parental unit, or the weird sprite thing yet. Go look for them?
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You are now!
Wowie, I think that's the first time that's happened!

You are in your house. Your house seems to be a treehouse now however, on account of it being atop a branch of a giant tree. A giant tree made of crystal.
The crystal faintly glows. Off in the distance, many smaller crystal trees do the same. The sky is dark and empty.
...Okay. Well. That's nice. But what are you supposed to be doing here?

You notice a light behind you.
You turn.
Oh. This must be one of those "sprite" things that Donald mentioned in his group message. Seems like it combined with one of your old halloween costumes.

Monstersprite: *ROAR*
WB: hello
Monstersprite: *ROAR*
WB: i know you can talk
WB: donalds sprite was a butterfly and it could talk
Monstersprite: ...*Grrr*...
WB: what is this place
Monstersprite: ...
Monstersprite: The land of Foliage and Gemstones.
WB: i see
WB: why am I here
Monstersprite: *Grrr* Because you are a player of Sburb. You are here to solve the ultimate riddle.
WB: and that is what exactly
WB: if your going to be unhelpful then why didnt you just fly away or eat me or something
Monstersprite: *Grrr*... I don't WANT to HELP YOU... BUT THE spRITE is MAKING me do IT...
WB: i see
WB: why
WB: can you at least tell me where to go next

Okay, so that was... Not as helpful as you had hoped. Still, at least you kind of have some idea of what this place is. You decide to look around yourself for a bit.

You step off of your porch.
You walk along the branch for a bit, before reaching the trunk. Looks like it has a staircase carved into it.

-Go up
-Go down
-Talk to friends (You will need to go back inside for this, as you do not own a CELL PHONE)
-Do something else (Write-in what)
Shout for your parental unit larvae.

He is crippled and the creatures of this world will be drawn to him.

Use him as bait, or arm him so that he may defend your domicile.
Get some tunes going. And go up, up is best.
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...Tunes? Well, you do have you old MP3 PLAYER with you.
You decaptchalogue it, and turn on one of your favorite songs.


Ahh yes. So much better to have something to listen to.

Creatures of this world? What are you talking about? Aside from the sprite, you have yet to see...

You turn around, and are met with an odd imp-like creature. It looks much like Monstersprite, but less glowy and floaty. In addition, it has wings on it's back, and is wearing some dumb sunglasses and a robe that can only be described as "cultish".

Before you can say a word, it initiates a STRIFE!
You swap the track to something a little more "battle music" like. https://fortissimohall.bandcamp.com/track/iridescent-mood-ring

You then unplug your headphones. As your strife specibus, is of course, SOUNDKIND.

The imp initiates the strife, so it goes first!
The imp used FLAILING OF THE LIMBS, Knocking 2 points of gel out of your HEALTH VIAL.
...So like. It basically gave you a tiny scratch. You are now at 98/100 health.

You have FOUR ATTACKS. Each one has a different effect. They are of course, color coded.
>ABSCOND (A magenta attack, used for running away or otherwise ending the battle in an unsatisfactory way)
>ABUSE (A yellow attack, used for taunting enemies. Has varying effects, not always in your favor, that can raise or lower stats)
>AFFECT (A dark blue attack, used to end battles in a peaceful way)
>ANNOY (A green attack, used to deal basic damage. As your strife specibus is SOUNDKIND, with a fairly old MP3 player, it will deal your MIND minus the enemy's GEL VISCOSITY plus a D10. Be sure to roll one if you select this option)

Well then. Best pick one.
>AFFECT: Attempt to recruit him with the power of MUSIC
Share that jazz number with this mad cat, get him into the swing of things.
Very well, if this fails however.


Break him open.
He might be full of candy.

Don't be a pansy! acquire your first round of EXecution Points.
File: MERCY.png (651 B, 110x42)
651 B
651 B PNG
EXecution Points...
A memory stirs. A memory of a video game that you remember quite fondly.

*Seeing this imp, trying it's best to accomplish it's most likely misguided goals, and seemingly doomed to fail and die by your hand...
*Fills you with the DETERMINATION to SPARE it.



You slowly slide the volume of your current music down, as to not end it abruptly, and pause it. You then turn the volume back up, and swap to a much calmer song.

*You ask the imp why it's attacking you.
*The imp seems confused.
*You sit down.
*The imp wonders why you're just leaving yourself open like this.
*You ask what kind of music it likes.
*The imp looks at you like your a crazy person.
*It says it hadn't really thought about it before.
*The imp sits down.

Minutes pass. You talk to the imp for a bit.
At some point, the strife ends due to inaction. The imp suddenly realizes what you're doing.
The imp runs off, seemingly no longer able to bring itself to fight you, but not willing to ALLY with you.


You weasel your way right up from LITERAL NOTHING to DUSTY SPECK on your ECHELADDER. +1 GEL VISCOSITY +1 MANGRIT.

Well. That was something. Looks like there are, in fact, creatures roaming this world. Dangerous ones at that.
You head back inside to let your STEPDAD know of the situation.

Well. While you're busy with that. May as well be someone else in the meantime!

Be Donald. (CL)
Be Abigail. (TC)
Be TB.
Be FM.
Be DD.
Be RM.
Nice work there, kid. Soon enough he'll be back begging to be in your band.

>Be TB
Even having taken the lighter path I am proud of your success.

However. You may wish to brush up on your dodging skill if you intend to take this path.

>Be TB

You are now TB! And why wouldn't you be? He's fucking AWESOME! WOOHOO!
Check it, your fucking RICH and live in a huge MANSION! You have so much moola, you can afford practically anything you want!
For example, your room? It has state of the art GHOST DETECTORS and an awesome hologram projector of the SOLAR SYSTEM. Along with tons of other expensive and cool shit.

If that's not cool, you don't know what fucking is.

Your clothing is also quite lavish, or rather it would be, if it wasn't for the fact that you really like looking RUGGED AS FUCK. The only exception being your sunglasses, on pair of which you actually prototyped with your sprite to make SUNGLASSESSPRITE. He's pretty cool.

Unfortunately, you're actually not particularly rugged. Your MANGRIT and GEL VISCOSITY are both at 3. Nothing to sneeze at, but not what most would call "impressive".
As for your other stats, you're LUCKY AS FUCK (4 LUCK). Like, damn.
As for your MIND stat...
The less said about that, the better (0 MIND).

But whatever! You don't really need to be smart. You have money!
I mean, you're pretty sure you need a college degree to be president, and that is definitely what you want to be, so that sucks. Or you could be an astronaut. Or a ghost hunter. It's a tough choice!
Sadly, ghosts are PROBABLY NOT REAL, and being an astronaut probably also requires some smarts, but WHATEVER.
Worst case scenario, you just don't get a job, and live off your family's fortune.
Not really the life you would WANT to live, but eh, what can you do?

The one downside to all this, is that your PARENTS are pretty much never home. Not gonna lie, that used to really bother you. But you've pretty much gotten over it. Not their fault that they have jobs that require them to be overseas a lot.

Ah well. At least this means you don't feel THAT sad about their deaths. I mean, it sucks, but whatever right?

Anyway, your entry item was a small cup of fluid. You pretty much drank it without even thinking about it, which is good because if you had hesitated you might have realized it was totally a cup of hot sauce. Yeah. That didn't feel good. But it got you here...


Your land seems to be a grassy hilly sort of place. In the distance, you see a city.
And if you look really closely (and you do. You have a state of theart telescope after all) you can see HOVERCARS flying around!

Sadly, you've been spending a lot of your time helping FM enter the game. But now that he has everything set up, Your free to fuck off and do whatever!

So with that in mind, what do you do?
Oh. And uh, you kinda need a NAME by the way. That's pretty fucking important.
I can assure that ghosts are definitely real. Hope you do not meet any.

Your name?

Totalitarian Butthead obviously.

Silly human, forgetting your own name...
Tom Branch

Your loved by fate right? Pack your sylladex with items, dont think about what, just take whatever looks useful at the moment.

Speak with the... SUNGLASSESSPRITE... *eugh*

See if it is willing to instruct you on the next step in your journey.

If it is not, either alchematize a mode of transportation, or take an existing one to the city.

Oh, and take money. Not paper or base metals you fool.


Or gold I suppose...
Why do you do this to me spoilers?
This alchemization thing is pretty neat. Maybe try combining your phone wih that holographic solar system. It could be AWESOME, and if not, well, you have got 8 phones, so no loss, right?
Hey, throw some oher things together too. Might get lucky and make a BADASS pistol.
>pistolkind strife, because rich
>Theodore Alexander Branch III

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