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/qst/ - Quests


Previous threads: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/qstarchive.html?tags=One%20Piece%20Bounty%20Photographer%20Quest
MC Pastebin: https://pastebin.com/XGUgpV79 (Silvers Harry link at the top)


In last episode’s thread of The Dog Whisperer, (thread 9.5 on suptg) Silvers Harry lost his memories, gained a handsome and mysterious companion named Stefan (he fluffy), and set out for a life of piracy beginning in East Blue. After his dad ordered someone else to take him there. Free taxi service, woo!

Oh, and you got some weird, shitty Devil Fruit that doesn’t do much, and the Whitebeard Pirates have decided you’re their brother. Whatever.

>ON THE WAAAAAAY (la la la) TO EAST BLUUUUUUUUEEEEEEEE

It’s a beautiful day in the Calm Belt. The seastone hull means a lack of sea-king attacks. The experience of Spiky and Kato mean that the boat remains on course towards the East Blue despite night or day.

In fact, this should be the last stop for resupply before you hit East Blue, which an increasingly aggrieved Spiky seems way too happy about. It’s almost like they don’t enjoy playing chauffeur for an amnesiac pirate-wannabe and his dog, but THAT’s too stupid to be the case.

Stefan is adorable.

“Feeeeeeed meeeeeeeee,” you politely request of Spiky, by looming over the back of his seat and resting your elbows on his shoulder. “Feeeeeeeeeeed meeeeeeee......”

He sure does twitch a lot lately. “We’ll be docking soon. You can eat then.”

... Man, anyone would think he hadn’t enjoyed the last few days with you. Weird.

>Roll 1d100, best of 3 for your upcoming resupply destination!
95+ is speshul.
>>
Rolled 29 (1d100)

>>3520516
Let's rock!
>>
Rolled 52 (1d100)

>>3520516
>>
Rolled 39 (1d100)

>>3520516
Adventure ahoy
>>
>>3520523
>>3520525
>>3520526
Fitting start.
>>
Rolled 69 (1d100)

>>3520516
>>
>>3520531
69 Quest begins...

Mediocre start, Silvers Harry continues as he began! Even OnePieceBaka can’t save him now, although I’m disappointed you didn’t score the surprisingly-real Sniper Island.
>>
>53

Sulking in a mature and classy manner, you head up on deck, where Kato’s at the helm, keeping you on track with the help of her Eternal Poses.

The island is already in sight - it’ll probably take just thirty minutes or so before you dock. You’ve never heard of Tock Island before, but being a Calm Belt island, you suspect it’s peaceful, lacking in piracy, and likely gets visitors in the form of Marines.

Which probably explains why you were told to lie low and not attract any attention while you!re there and your two minions get supplies Easy enough! After all. All you want to do is...

>Check our a pet store to get some creature comforts for your new buddy
>Check out a weapons store because weapons. Duh.
>Check out the bounty office to see who’s who in East Blue.
>E A T E V E R Y T H I N G
>Other?
>>
>>3520550
>>Check our a pet store to get some creature comforts for your new buddy
>>
>>3520550
>>E A T E V E R Y T H I N G
Silvers is obviously powered by food like Flashman is powered by sugar (and JUSTICE somtetimes), so clearly this will help him not be such a mediocre idiot.
>>
>>3520550
>>Check our a pet store to get some creature comforts for your new buddy
Gotta reward this good boi
>>
>>3520550
>>Check our a pet store to get some creature comforts for your new buddy
Gotta have priorites.
>>
>>3520550
>Check our a pet store to get some creature comforts for your new buddy
Followed by
>CONSUME, and procure food for new buddy as well
>>
>>3520550
>>Check our a pet store to get some creature comforts for your new buddy
>>
Rolled 65 (1d100)

Heading homish, homies.

Rolling for stuff.
>>
Rolled 64 (1d100)

Rolling for dice gods mercy on Harry in this thread
>>
>>3520655
It's MEDIOCRE TIME
Such as the thirty minutes I just spent teaching the difference between right and left. Seasus.

>tithe for the great one

Yeah, you need to get some creature comforts for your magnificent little buddy. He deserves only The Best, after all.

With a little time remaining though, as you lean against the side and enjoy the view, you decide to

>Talk to Kato. As a Redhaired pirate, she's probably led an interesting life, maybe.
>Keep teaching Stefan how to sword. As a pirate, he must learn how to defend himself!
>Practice with your own large stabbies. Guts and Griffith need a workout.
>Other?
>>
>>3520726
>>Talk to Kato. As a Redhaired pirate, she's probably led an interesting life, maybe.
>>
>>3520726
>>Keep teaching Stefan how to sword. As a pirate, he must learn how to defend himself!
>>
>>3520726
>>Keep teaching Stefan how to sword. As a pirate, he must learn how to defend himself!
I've long since abandoned the idea of Silvers being more than mediocre anymore. It's Stefan Quest now!
>>
>>3520726
>keep teaching stefan how to sword

Red haired pirates are of no importance
And we're already the best at stabby
>>
>>3520726
>>Talk to Kato. As a Redhaired pirate, she's probably led an interesting life, maybe.
Remember that time that kid stabbed himself in the face, goooooood tiiiiiimes
>>
>>3520726
>Keep teaching Stefan how to sword. As a pirate, he must learn how to defend himself!
>>
>>3520726
>Keep teaching Stefan how to sword. As a pirate, he must learn how to defend himself!
>>
Rolled 45 (1d100)

>>3520775
>>
Rolled 38 (1d100)

>>3520775
HUNDDO FOR DOGGO
>>
>swordog

You eye Kato for a moment as she checks some depth readings, before turning to look at Stefan, sunning himself across the deck.

"Stefan! Training time!"

His head instantly perks up, ears picking and tail slamming happily against the wooden floor, as he scrambled to his paws and trots over. You've already unsheathed 'his' blade, a good-quality shortsword, and like the well-trained and intelligent dog that he is, he grasps the hilt carefully in his mouth as you hold it out to him.

"You're a good boy," you tell him solemnly, "but you must become a good sword-boy as well."

"Bworf!" The tail continues to wag as Stefan gives muffled agreement.

>Roll 1d100, best of 3 for sword-doggo
>>
Rolled 8 (1d100)

>>3520775
K
>>
Rolled 64 (1d100)

>>3520775
>>
Rolled 70 (1d100)

>>3520779
>>
Rolled 29, 37, 56, 1, 50, 33, 55, 40, 37, 31 = 369 (10d100)

Best roll is 45.

Rolling to shake some mediocrity out.
>>
Rolled 75 (1d100)

>>3520779
K again
>>
Rolled 88 (1d100)

>>3520779
>>
>>3520785
Best roll is 88 because you deleted previous posts
>>
>>3520785
Well. You certainly did. Let's hope that actually did something.

Also I was secretly hoping that Stefan would end up being better at swordplay than us
>>
>>3520785
>highest is 56
>1
How can best pupper be so meh?
>>
>>3520785
Holy mediocre +critical fail Batman.
>>
>>3520789
Votes and rolls count even if the original post was deleted, as they've always been
>>
>>3520785
>the highest roll was a 55

>nat 1

Is it a sign?
>>
>>3520785
well that certainly was a lot of mediocrity.
>>
Rolled 25 (1d100)

>>3520796
Maybe we need to give Stefan guns like a Digimon. Just...strap a fuckload of cannons and guns to him. Dice gods do you agree?
>>
>>3520800
oh no
>>
Rolled 2 (1d3)

>45

Apparently Stefan doesn't much feel like training today - he does a little, but gets more excited by the approaching landmass, and it doesn't take long before you give up and let him go and bork ferociously at the docks instead.

Your four-legged disciple is lucky he's cute.

Kato glances over as you step ashore, quickly followed by Stefan. "You've got your money, kid?"

Your eyes gleam with the look of someone raised by Shakky. "Will you give me some if I say no?"

"Nah."

"... Oh."

>Roll 1d100, first 3 rolls, to see whether you're skint or flush.
1 is best of, 2 is middle, 3 is worst of.
>>
Rolled 49 (1d100)

>>3520810
Big money
>>
Rolled 72 (1d100)

>>3520810
middle goddamnit
>>
Rolled 26 (1d100)

>>3520810
Alright dice gods, what about money? Is that the encouragement?
>>
Rolled 30 (1d100)

>>3520810
>>
Rolled 90 (1d100)

>>3520810
>>
>>3520812
Just below average

How does this keep happening
>>
>>3520810
>>3520812
WHY IS EVERY ROLE SO MEDIOCRE
>>
>>3520817
>>3520818
Maybe we should go sacrifice a goat or something. Or is this divine retribution for Flashman's crimes against the Dice Gods?
>>
File: 1497436558397.gif (951 KB, 500x281)
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WE'RE THE FUCKING SON OF A MAN WHO IS YOUNKOU LEVEL

THE NUMBER 2 TO THE KING OF THE PIRATES

HE'S TRAINED US SINCE BIRTH TO BE THE BEST

WHY ARE WE SO MEDIOCRE!!!
>>
Rolled 54 (1d100)

Rolling to break curse
>>
>>3520822
the real reason qm wanted to go back to silvers was to feel our rage after those ridiculous flashy rolls
>>
Rolled 50 (1d100)

>>3520824
Rolling to find a camera. Maybe this will be the One Piece Photographer Quest...
>>
>>3520828
Perfectly mediocre, as all things should be
>>
so what happens if a poneglyph eats a devil fruit?
>>
Rolled 23, 45, 29, 65, 73, 32, 40, 33, 57, 33 = 430 (10d100)

>>3520813
At least it wasn't worst of!

>49

You have... a few hundred beri. That's lunch sorted, and maybe a few necessities, but you're not going to be getting anything fancy. Not like Stefan deserves.

Still, you're sure you can find a way to pick up a little extra cash while you're ashore, right?

"I have cash," you explain to Kato. "Tons of it. I'm rich, you know."

She stares at you. "Uh huh."

"And, um, my Devil Fruit actually makes gold. Just so you know."

"Uh huh." She waves you off. "Be back by 10 PM, and stay clear of any Marines. And if any Whitebeard Pirates turn up, we don't know you."

Rude.

You scowl at her, turn your nose up, and venture into town, your noble dog ambling alongside.

>First up - food!
>Gotta get more money before anything else...
>Take a wander and see the sights.
>Other?

>>3520824
Mmmmmmm yeeeesssss it's so gooooooodddd

Rolling to shake out the nat100s so you can't use them.
>>
Rolled 85 (1d100)

>>3520831
Rolling to Thanos Snap the Curse
>>
>>3520833
>gotta get mo money fo mo problems
>>
>>3520833
>Procure funds with Stefan by doing a street performance. You have devil magic you can fool suckers into giving you cash with.
>>
>>3520833
>First up - food!
At least get something to eat first, then we can try to get more money for a dinner feast!
>>
>>3520832
You get Kaido
>>
>>3520833
>>Gotta get more money before anything else...
>>
>>3520833
>>Gotta get more money before anything else.
>>
moolah

"We need cash, Stefan," you tell him, while he happily sniffs a moving, clockwork statue of what's presumably some local hero. His arm waves surprisingly smoothly as the small cogs turn. "Sweet, sweet beri. I mean, we could steal stuff - no, don't pee on that - but there's a Marine base here, so that might cause problems."

Hmmm. How to get cash - while lying low and not attracting attention...

>Pickpocketing should be easy, right? Even little kids can do it!
>Put on a street show with your fluffy assistant!
>Find a gang or something blatantly illegal. Then rob them! Who are they gonna report it to, the cops? HA!
>Find a casino or gambling house and try your luck!
>You don't have a bounty yet, so find a local criminal and turn them in for their own bounty!
>Other?
>>
Rolled 35 (1d100)

>>3520854
>Find a casino or gambling house and try your luck!
Behold, luck.
>>
>>3520854
>You don't have a bounty yet, so find a local criminal and turn them in for their own bounty!
>>
>>3520857
>put on a show with GODfan
>>
Rolled 88 (1d100)

>>3520859
What could possibly go wrong?
>>
>>3520863
Apparently Hitler.
>>
>>3520857
>Find a gang or something blatantly illegal. Then rob them! Who are they gonna report it to, the cops? HA!
>>
>>3520857
>>You don't have a bounty yet, so find a local criminal and turn them in for their own bounty!
>>
>>3520857
>You don't have a bounty yet, so find a local criminal and turn them in for their own bounty!
>>
Rolled 91, 57, 98 = 246 (3d100)

>>3520865
I mean, I was thinking that 88 is good fortune in China, but it means Nazis too, I guess...

Rolling to keep dice fresh and non-mediocre.
>>
>>3520857
>Go do street performances with your fluffy assistant

>>3520871
Its also Double Khorne. Blood for the Blood God.
>>
>>3520871
Whoah, good dice...

>bounty time

There's only one sensible thing for you, a professional and mature soon-to-be pirate to do...

Hunt. Bounties.

>Check out the local bounty office first, see who the wanted locals are.
>Just look for criminals. Maybe ask around. It's like investigating, right?
>Other?
>>
>>3520874
>Check out the local bounty office first, see who the wanted locals are.
>>
>>3520874
>>Check out the local bounty office first, see who the wanted locals are.
>>
>>3520874
>Check out the local bounty office first, see who the wanted locals are.
>>
>inb4 they have a really old picture of our father here and they try to arrest us because we look like him.
>>
>>3520874
>Check out the local bounty office first, see who the wanted locals are.
>>
>>3520874
>>Check out the local bounty office first, see who the wanted locals are.
>>
>>3520885
Just gotta draw a big Gol D. Rogers moustache on yourself to confuse them.

>bounty office

Horaloga Town is a bastion of everything clockwork apparently, including an absolute crapton of watch- and clock-shops in the tourist area. Still, you find someone who points the way to the local bounty office, which isn't too far; you get there sharpish, except for two stops for people to pet Stefan.

Totally understandable.

The bounty office is clean and neat, latest posters pinned to a board on the wall, a bored-looking Marine reading something behind the reception desk. She glances up at you when you enter, pegs you as a bounty hunter by the mass load of weapons attached to you, and goes back to reading. Ha! Gullible fool! Little does she know that she stan- okay, sits - in the presence of Silvers Harry!

... And Stefan.

........ More importantly, there's three bounties that look promising. But which one to choose?

>'Fleshcutter' Griselda, local crime boss, bounty 50,000 beri
>Malko 'Deft Touch' Ben, local sneak-thief and burglar, 35,000,000
>'Phantom' (real name unknown), a travelling assassin apparently suspected of being on the island to kill some famous local, 75,000,000 beri.
>Nah, you got other stuff to do.
>>
>>3520928
>>'Phantom' (real name unknown), a travelling assassin apparently suspected of being on the island to kill some famous local, 75,000,000 beri.
Go big or go home.
>>
>>3520928
>>'Phantom' (real name unknown), a travelling assassin apparently suspected of being on the island to kill some famous local, 75,000,000 beri.
Go big or go home
>>
File: same guys.jpg (46 KB, 800x450)
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>>3520935
>>
>>3520928
>>'Phantom' (real name unknown), a travelling assassin apparently suspected of being on the island to kill some famous local, 75,000,000 beri.
This can only end well
>>
>>3520934
...one second difference. Single missing period. Anon how are you reading my mind
>>
>>3520928
>'Fleshcutter' Griselda, local crime boss, bounty 50,000 beri
>>
>>3520928
>phantom

Big, home
>>
>>3520950
at least it was before i fucked everything up
>>
>>3520928
>>'Fleshcutter' Griselda, local crime boss, bounty 50,000 beri
With a moniker like Fleshcutter, I think it's safe to assume they are not a nice person. We won't feel bad about this.
>>
>le phantom

"Hey, this Phantom guy," you call to the Marine on duty, "there's no proper photo? Or idea of where he'll be?" Just a hand-drawn picture of a vague figure in a long, black cloak and hood. Great.

The Marine looks up, pursing her lips. "Just that sketch. As for location, all we know is that he sent a calling card that he was going to kill one of the local bankers - Marius Gilding - sometime this week."

... An assassin who sends calling cards. Weird. "So... I should hang out near a bank?"

The Marine sighs, turning a page of her book. "Mr Markus is in hiding somewhere for the rest of the week, doubtless with a ton of bodyguards. I doubt you'll find him OR Phantom."

>That sounds like a challenge!
>Maybe one of the others would be easier to find instead...
>Other?
>>
>>3520971
>>That sounds like a challenge!
That phantom guy'll never see it coming
>>
>>3520971
>>That sounds like a challenge!
>>
>>3520971
>That sounds like a challenge!
We have a good boi who could find them
>>
>>3520971
>>That sounds like a challenge!
>>Captain Stefan lead the way!
>>
>>3520971
>That sounds like a challenge!
>>
>>3520971
>>That sounds like a challenge!
>>Buuuuut also get the location of 'Fleshcutter' while you're here. Not that you'll fail! Just in case you get bored, or finish up super fast, obviously.
>>
>no problem

Your eyes narrow in glee as you straighten to your full, magnificent, nearly-6-feet height. "That sounds like a challenge!"

"It's not."

"Stefan!"

He cocks his head at you. "Borf?"

"We're hunting down... the Phantom!"

"It's just 'Phantom'," the Ensign corrects.

"Same thing!" You fold your arms, deep in TACTICS and STRATEGY as you figure out how best to seek put this nefarious killer...

>Stefan! Fetch 'Phantom'!
>(Track down this banker guy. Phantom must be near him!)
>(Stand on a rooftop and yell for Phantom to come out and fight you. Genius!)
>Other?
>>
>>3520988
>>Stefan! Fetch 'Phantom'!
Stefan is Silvers' Pistol-chan
>>
>>3520988
>>Stefan! Fetch 'Phantom'!
He's the most competent member of our crew.
>>
>>3520988
>>Stefan! Fetch 'Phantom'!
>>
>>3520988
>>Stefan! Fetch 'Phantom'!
Pistol-chan ain't got nothin'
>>
>>3520988
>>Stefan! Fetch 'Phantom'!
>>
>>3520988
>Stefan! Fetch 'Phantom'!
>>
>>3520988
>Stefan! Fetch 'Phantom'!
>>
>mfw you rely on luck in Mediocre Quest

All right, don't say I didn't warn you.

>Roll 1d100, best of 3 for goodboi
>>
Rolled 75 (1d100)

>>3521006
>>
Rolled 85 (1d100)

>>3521006
>>
Rolled 99 (1d100)

>>3521006
But this is Stefan's luck
>>
>>3521013
Bork.
>>
Rolled 96 (1d100)

>>3521006
>>
>>3521013
Oh wow.
>>
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>>3521013
HAIL STEFAN
>>
>>3521013
And that's how Stefan found the One Piece.
>>
>>3521029
>Stefan found the One Piece
>Stefan is the One Piece
>>
>>3521013
You're right. I apologise for my blasphemy.

Also, what the fuck.


Need an early night tonight, sorry guys. Back tomorrow with, um... Phantom, I guess. CHUUNI VS CHUUNI ACTION! Only in Mediocre Quest!
>>
>>3521006
We're not relying on luck, we're relying on Stefan!
>>
>>3521038
You see we're ridiculously average, but when we hold Stefan? We found the Yami Yami, escaped Whitebeard, and now found a professional assassin
>>
Rolled 76 (1d100)

That's the secret, we invoke Stephan and the dice will flow.
>>
>Be Wyper, last of clan
>And apparently dead. Without having taken vengeance on the one calling himself "God".
>At least your ancestors are understanding, not that it wipes the shame of failure from--oh what the fresh hell is this shit?!
>Some land dwelling mongloid has somehow made it up to here, apparently just to loot your corpse. What, nooo, you're not mad.
>You're absolutely livid. Damned monkey, he might as well "tea bag" your corpse while he's at i--
>Wait.
>Did he just--
>Holy shit, he did! He just spun around and jammed your skates straight into Enel's nose! You can barely keep yourself from laughing!
>Now all that he needs to do is--oh wow! Blondie just offed him with one of his priests' weapons!
>Okay, yeah, you can definitely rest in peace now. All thanks to the land dweller who didn't fuck around.

Only way this could get better for Wyper is if Flashy were a relative through more bloodline bullshit.
>>
Rolled 74 (1d100)

>>3521122
Rolling for Kaidoggo Ou
>>
Rolled 14 (1d100)

Rolling for Ace's death on this timeline
>>
Rolled 70, 56, 15, 61, 16, 84, 3, 76, 41, 12 = 434 (10d100)

>>3522173
>Even in another thread he keeps jobbing
Rip Fail Abs

Also preemptively getting rid of the mediocrity
It's Crit or Bust bois
>>
Rolled 54 (1d100)

>>3522173
Rolling for Luffy's death
>>
I think I found 30 yo. Flashman's theme song

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4_gObHt1uZA
>>
Sorry guys, feel absolutely shit and gonna sleep for the rest of today. Updates tomorrow. IF I LIVE.
>>
>>3522342
Holy shit I think you did.
Generally happy and upbeat tune with hints of adventure and 'stuff is happening' in the background, occasionally morphing into full on badass with lightning flashes accenting it, only to get back to the happy upbeat tune afterwards.

Also, now I have to go and see what that game is about, because that theme is a banger and a half.
>>
>>3522351
Rest in Pepperoni

But no really, take all the time you need. Health is important yo
>>
>>3522351
>bemoan the death of gun x glory quest
>gets sick just when it returns
being qm is suffering
>>
>tmw you drew a In loving memory image for enel for when he died but the the fact we fucking crit killed him in two moves made you forget
Opps

Day 341, It still hasnt posted. I'm beginning to suspect I've died and this is my special torment

Day 457, it said that the captcha was mityped again. I'm starting to hate captcha

Day 679, I suppose it my fault for using up my mobile data, but at this point I've lost all nutrients. I don't think I'll make it to the end of this thread.

Is this the will of the dice gods. To curse me to this eternal torment. I hope that one day my post will be reached though i fear i wont be there to see it. Will onepiecebaka roll more 100's? Will we get more 69's? Will BPQM finally have her plans fulfilled? I doubt the chances of that last one.

The post. It temps me. It mocks me.
Am I truly alone? Is this how the edgy anon falls. Not in a hail of shitposts, but in a whimper before being blown out by Captcha? How...disappointing.

Day 894
Sometimes I wonder why I'm still here. Is it cause I want praise. Because I feel it's my duty. Maybe I'm just a stubborn fool. I wish it would end. I've started seeing things. Things that shouldn't be, that 't be.

Day 932
The green cat made Tumblr. Serikyou was sych a lobby by tax printer. Dull is justice!

Day 1089
I remember I had a friend who was going to let me post the image on their phone. I didn't cause it was of slightly less on their phone. I regret that I didn't just use their phone.
>>
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>>3522987
It was not worth the wait
>>
>>3523198
To be honest, breddy good, I like it.
The nips could be a tiny bit lower.
The collar bones look a bit off, connect together too smoothly?
Face is somewhat unsymmetrical.
Literally no mouth and has to scream.
>>
>>3523234
Logia users can end up very fucked when they're hit mid-transformation with seastone
>>
File: 1553483835608.gif (882 KB, 500x281)
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>Meanwhile, sometime in an alternate future Archeologist Quest

Okay, roll to get sympathy from Flashman; you've got a nice bonus of +30 thanks to that story of yours.
>One anon rolls a natural 100
...Yeah, I'm...I'm going to have to rewrite some things. I'll be right back.

>2 hours later

https://youtu.be/2O4YXW-GmGI
Gently patting you on the head with a warm smile, Flashman says he's going to have a word with Spandam regarding your holding conditions. It isn't long before you hear much yelling, along with screams of pain, possibly some having their bones broken, and then silence.

Flashman then comes back into your cell, smiling, as if the chaos outside hadn't happened. "Well, wouldn't you know it, I got lost looking for him, and meanwhile that handsome devil Arthur came in and caused a mess! Clearly, Enies Lobby isn't safe enough to hold you, I'll have to take you elsewhere."

Congratulations, you gained a possible husbando with op bullshit. I need a freaking drink.

>Alternativly, with 3 natural 100s or more

https://youtu.be/loTcZHoIYfQ
In the distance, from Flashman's arms, you can see the smoldering remains of Enies Lobby, the result of his unbridled wrath. And yet, you feel safe within those very arms that very recently laid waste to your prison. That handsome, yet somewhat goofy grin, also does wonders to alleviate all your previous worries. Perhaps, together, you can face whatever challenges lie in the future. With that, you both share a tender kiss.

Screw it, quest over, you essentially have weapon lord Raiden as your husband now. I picked the wrong day to quit sniffing glue.

>The players' faces, despite having ended the quest
>>
>>3523361
delet this.
It's amusing and true to quest, but delet for BPs sake.
>>
>>3523361
And from the ashes of that quest comes the Inevitable sequel when OP realizes there Is too much to leave hanging but can't continue the quest as Is.

Marine Photographer Archeologist's Husband Quest: Rising Revengeance In which Flashman takes on the world government and the celestial dragons.
>>
>>3523361
Absolutely based

Now the only problem will be dealing with your in laws and his grandparents private club
>>
Guess who has motherfucking heatstroke or some shit, it's meeeeeeee

I'm spending today in bed as well, you guys can continue lewding or whatever I feel too sick to even care

You're all dead when I get back though kthnxbai
>>
>>3524041
Fuck sake, mate. Drink some water and get some rest.
>>
>>3524041
....does that mean we can ship Noodle x Merry?
>>
>>3524041
Don't die pls

I wouldn't be able to take another Crusty incident
>>
>>3524119
Crusty incident?
>>
>>3524139
QM for a very well-regarded quest that died abruptly after a period of illness.
He is missed.
>>
>>3524147
Damn. What quest?
>>
>>3524201
Homeless Mutant Quest
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=Homeless%20Mutant%20Quest
>>
>>3524147
Crusty died?
>>
>>3524335
Not sure if it's confirmed, but the dude had cancer and suddenly vanished from the Internet without a word. It was sad.
I am sad.
>>
>>3524596
>watch Deadpool
>die of cancer
Such is the irony of life.
>>
>>3524596
Nooooo
I loved that quest and gm
>>
Sooo, what are the odds we get totally-not-Mjollnir by asking a smith to make a hammer through some odd contrivance of 1s and 100s?

"Yeah, I got your hammer, enjoy! Ahahaha--"

"It's...perfect! How did you know to make it so heavy yet so small?! You're a genius!"

"You're...welcome...? (What in the actual fu--)"

And then Flashman became Thor, by heavily abusing electromagnetic shenanigans to have his hammer return to him after throwing it.
>>
>>3525296
If we get a hammer, I vote to put Reject Dial on one side and a Jet Dial on the other.
>activate Jet
>hit someone with a hammer
>Reject absorbs all force, making what looks like an incredibly strong hit feel like being smacked with a pool noodle
>enemy gets overconfident
>"Oh, sorry, let me try that again"
>he actually does
>repeat, but this time activate Reject when hit connects
>>
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>>3525716
i like this idea.

Also that parallel to the Ussop Hammer is good too
>>
>>3525717
It would be nice if we could have some sort of mechanism to have it pop out or into the hammerhead, so we can still still Jet-smash stuff without Reject being involved at all.
Or, if such mechanism is out of the question, at least have it forged in a way that we can still hit stuff with the Jet side of things, like have Jet Dial attached in a way that redirects the jet through a series of tunnels to come out of the back of the hammerhead so there is no danger in damaging the dial when hammering.
If none of those options are available, I guess we can still normally hammer things with a side of the head, with Jet on one end and Reject on another.
Or, the absolute best option, just hand-wave it and say that it just works, like repeating flintlock pistols.
>>
>>3525750
Honestly I’m of the opinion we have to many weapons as it is. We should stick to Ka-tan, cutlass, jitte, pistol, fans, cannonball and hammer and keep it at that. No meteor hammer, no lance, no dials no sword whip etc. We’re reaching the point where learning new weapons is just slowing us down. The above weapons plus the gorogoro no mi gives us all the versatility we need. Heavy and light short and long range options, logia defenses and fruit enhanced observation haki.
>>
>>3525846
But that's literally the opposite of what we're going for.
More weapons we master the closer we get to a complete weapon mastery skill where every weapon possible is automatically + whatever.
Pick up a broom and use it like we've trained for years in broom combat.
>>
>>3525859
>Pick up a broom and use it like we've trained for years in broom combat.
...Damn, now I want to see the Navy Seals copy pasta modified to fit broom combat
>>
>>3525876
>I have over 300 confirmed floors cleaned
>>
>>3525859
Except it’s getting to the point that we’re forgetting all the shit we have and we’re wasting time training stuff we’ll never use. (Billiards for example.) Not to mention carrying around all this stuff is kinda ridiculous. A sack of cannonballs, two more cannonballs connected by a chain, a pistol, a lance, a sword whip, three different swords etc.

If you want to pick up anything and use it as a weapon (though why we would ever need to do this considering all the fucking weapons we always have is beyond me and even if we DO get disarmed completely somehow, we now have our fruit) we can just get an improvised weapon skill. Bam. Ladders, vases and brooms are now deadly instruments in our hands. No need to train literally every weapon in existence.
>>
>>3525881
>>
>>3525878
>I am trained in guerilla floor-care
>>
We should kill someone with a devil fruit at some point. Literally the fruit.
>>
>>3525954
>Inb4 Nat 1 and we accidentally feed them the fruit
>>
>>3525954
>>3525960
That would be an easy way to kill a Devil Fruit user. Just force feed them a fruit and watch them go kapoom.
>>
>>3525967
We could cook something for an enemy but instead of poison, use a devil fruit.
>>
>>3525972
Mix a DF and seastone into a cake and send it to whitebeards pirates?
>>
>>3525976
Nah, Devil Fruit juice spray bottle.
>>
>Bpqm still not back
>Concerned.png
>>
>>3525883
Hes kind of right.
The argument of 'you can now use anything as a weapon you were training in for years' holds no water when we are toting our own personal armory on our backs 24/7, we simply dont need that ability because we have all the weapons we could ever need or want always at hand.

On the other hand having so many weapons is cool, and using them all is even cooler.
Thus we should start developing our own style of fighting that would incorporate ALL of our weapons.
I imagine that after getting our quickdraw, iado and weapon-swapping skills up enough, we will be able to fight by cycling through our weapon collection and taking a swing with each of them, seamlessly, in the heat of combat.
And with each new weapon we pick up, train and incorporate into it, the skill it all rolls in gets stronger and stronger.
Thats how I see our Living Armory Style.
>>
>>3526053
Somone must have been waifuing
>>
>>3526138
Can't believe BP finally died from the curse.
>>
Nah, BP isn't dead guys. Just dying from heatstroke.

I'm kidding, she's probably fine
>>
>>3526101
This is what I was envisioning as well. Constantly shifting weapons and styles mid combat and forcing our opponents to adapt or die.
>>
>>3526893
But then zolo will be buttmad that we aren't technically swordsman

And for a non-meme answer, if we do that we're going to have to stop having emotional klau connections with our weapons, or else the love will spread too thin and then none will awaken
>>
>>3527266
We just have to convince Zolo that anything can be a sword with enough skill and the right mind set.
>>
>>3526548
I'm feeling better this morning, might make a doctor appointment later. Think we'll actually get some updates today, wow gee gosh, well done me.

>>3527584
Do you really want to give him ideas? You want Zoro tri-wielding/firing shotguns and calling them swords?
>>
>>3527675
Thank goodness, happy to hear it.

Also, yes.
>>
>>3527266
Harry has more than enough love for all his children, and his snake, and his many many dads. He'll definitely get them all to awaken.
>>
>>3527675
>Zoro goes full /k/
>Oh shit
>Rapid fire Incendiary shotgun spread 'sword' style, with all the bonuses that apply Armament haki and all

Hit the fucking deck no one's getting out of that alive
>>
>>3527266
>awaken
That reminds me.
After our talk with Zoro back at Alabasta, and now after meeting Merry, we HAVE TO haki-poke our weapons.
We always were feeling a special connection with our weapons afterall.
Also, for even more feels haki-poke Wado to maybe get another insight into Zoros story.
>>
Okay, so.

Guess who realised Gun x Glory was up again, started reading, and then ran out of phone data?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA short run today because I’m using pub WiFi and won’t be able to run at home, hahahahaha I hate everything.

Good news, my data refreshes on the 26th. Don’t know if I’ll be able to run tomorrow because it’s busting-out-of-the-womb anniversary anyway, so just presume I’ll be drunk all day tomorrow.

Writing now for STEFAN QUEST.
>>
>>3528026
>Guess who realised Gun x Glory was up again, started reading, and then ran out of phone data?
acceptable
>>
"Ah, come on, sis! I need to take the Wado back so my eternal rival can have a chance!"
"No! :p"
"You're just being childish now; that's my shtick, dang it! ...I have a stupidly brilliant idea."


"Are you wielding Tashigi as a sword?!"
"It the only way I could effectively bring the sword with me. Also, come on, you've seen me wield stranger."
"Shut up and swing me at Zoro already!"
>>
>99 - you will eventually find Phantom, the question is WHERE and HOW

your name is STEFAN and you are a GOODBOY. many friends have told you this! this is GOOD.

today you are away from the big wet and on a big dry. there are many smells. this is GOOD too! your new big friend with the yellow fur and big metal teeth has taken you for WALKIES so you can investigate the new and exciting smells. he does not let you chase a cat. this is NOT GOOD.

big tooth friend say, “Stefan!” this is you! a GOODBOY! “Fetch Phantom!”

you know ‘fetch’. fetch is GOOD! you don’t know ‘phantom’. not know is NOT GOOD. you tell big tooth friend this by saying, “Borf! Bwuff!” and wag tail very hard.

big tooth friend... stupid. big lots stupid. but he pets you nice, so you give him lick anyway. poor stupid big tooth friend. he a GOODBOY but litter-runt.

well, big tooth friend enjoys playing, and playing is GOOD! you will play the fetch game with him, and he will be happy. because you are a GOODBOY.

“Wuff!” you run from this big brick house of boring smells into street of exciting smells. back inside, big tooth friend sound happy, say human words to bad-coat not-friend before following you.

“Go on, Stefan,” he say. “I’ll follow you!”

where can you play that will make big tooth friend have most fun...?

>big big house way over there, with not-friend bird sign! all your other big friends like playing with the not-friends!
>sewers! lots and lots of exciting smells! and rats!
>big house you passed before, with many-lots recent human smells, and singing and shouting coming out. humans like singing! and shouting!
>Other?

>>3528038
It would improve your reach greatly AND Tashigi would get a loophole around your eternal dibs! Genius, she’d go for that 100%.

>>3528029
#fuck0phelia2030
>>
>>3528051
>>big big house way over there, with not-friend bird sign! all your other big friends like playing with the not-friends!
Also happy early-birthday, since I'm probably not gonna be awake long enough for a proper one before you get shitfaced from all the caffeine, since I'm pretty sure that's how spiders work?
>>
>>3528051
>big big house way over there, with not-friend bird sign! all your other big friends like playing with the not-friends!

>he a GOODBOY but litter-runt.
Glorious
>>
>>3528051
>>big big house way over there, with not-friend bird sign! all your other big friends like playing with the not-friends!
Oh boy.
Glad you're only somewhat dead. Enjoy GxG
>>
>>3528051
>>big big house way over there, with not-friend bird sign! all your other big friends like playing with the not-friends!
>>
>>3528051
>big big house way over there, with not-friend bird sign! all your other big friends like playing with the not-friends!
>>
>>3528051
>>big big house way over there, with not-friend bird sign! all your other big friends like playing with the not-friends!
>>
>>3528054
Yes, that’s exactly how spiders work. Caffeine and the occasional fly.

>big not-friend house

Stefan is definitely on the hunt! He leads you onwards with all the confidence of a natural tracker, tail wagging a mile a minute as he does. It only takes you a few minutes of chasing him through the streets, dodging shoppers, before you realize where he’s headed.

The local Marine base.

Of course! If you were a travelling assassin, where better to hide than right under the noses of the local Marines?! It’s almost as genius as you are!

“Stefan you’re the goodest of boys,” you tell him, proud, as he stops to let you catch up with him. He borks and shoves his wet nose against your boot. Thanks, little dude.

... Then he breaks off again, while you're busy coming up with a cunning plan, and hurtles past the surprised pair of infantry guarding the entrance, into the base itself.

Oops.

>CHASE AFTER HIM, they probably won’t try to shoot, right?
>Talk to those sentries, one of them can go fetch him out for you.
>Head around the base and see if there’s any way to sneak in.
>Other?
>>
>>3528089
>>CHASE AFTER HIM, they probably won’t try to shoot, right?
What could possibly go wrong?
I mean, besides us getting shot. Again.
>>
>>3528089
>>CHASE AFTER HIM, they probably won’t try to shoot, right?
>>
>>3528089
>CHASE AFTER HIM, they probably won’t try to shoot, right?
>>
>>3528089
>CHASE AFTER HIM, they probably won’t try to shoot, right?
>Yell THERE ARE ASSASSINS AFOOT! FOLLOW THAT GOOD BOI
>>
u is chasing GOODBOI STEFAN

>Roll 1d100, best of 3
>>
Rolled 55 (1d100)

>>3528118
Here's my birthday present of a heart attack for you
>>
Rolled 44 (1d100)

>>3528118
>>
>>3528120
Ah, damn, nevermind.
>>
Rolled 64 (1d100)

>>3528118
>>
Rolled 1 (1d100)

>>3528123
This is Mediocre Quest. No heart attacks here!

... Rolling for regular Flashy heart attacks.

>>3528124
Awwww, if you’d got a 66 to go with the 44 and 55, I’d have given a bonus. Oh, well.
>>
>>3528126
So flashy ded quest over?
>>
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>>3528126
i can't believe flashman is fucking dead
>>
>>3528120
>>3528121
>>3528124
Ahhhh Mediocrity

>>3528126
Rip QM
>>
Glad to see you alive, OP.
>>3528126
>1 on a heart attack check
And that the dice are the same as ever. Does that mean Flashy is dead, or does he have the best heart on the seas?
>>
Well, everyone, we had a good run, but it looks like Flashy went and died on us. I’m sure we’ll all remember the good times he gave us, like when he ate candy... or fell through a roof... or ate more candy... or fell overboard and nearly drowned,

But now’s the time to accept our loss, wrap him up in a newspaper, and throw him in a dumpster.

Please join me next week for the all-new Roronoa Zoro Swears Revenge On Fate For Killing His Rivals And Tries To Stab Reality Quest!
>>
>>3528140
Jokes on him he needs to go through the stairway to heaven to accomplish that
>>
Rolled 46, 39, 42 = 127 (3d100)

>64

Marine rolls and Stefan roll
>>
>>3528149
>Stefan getting mediocre rolls
What is this blasphemy?
>>
>>3528151
all the bullshit is saved for Flashy, this i mediocre quest
>>
>congrats, you somehow managed to beat both Marines AND stay on Stefan’s tail despite mediocrity.

“‘S’CUSE ME,” you request, blitzing past the pair of Marines while they’re still trying to figure out why a dog just ran past them, and if they should be chasing it or not.

“Wait, you can’t g-!”

Nah, you don’t have time for that. Stefan’s waggy tail vanishes off from the entrance hall, down a corridor, and you promptly give chase. Ignoring the white walls and occasional (confused) passing Marine or civilian staff, you follow him through winding corridors and up stairs, his claws thankfully loud against tiled floors.

How fast can Stefan go?!

>Roll 1d100, best of 3


>>3528151
He WANTS you to catch up with him, duh. What a goodboi!
>>
Enel kick-started his heart with his devil fruit so we still can still survive this
>>
Rolled 52 (1d100)

>>3528161
>>
Rolled 61 (1d100)

Go Stefan Go!
>>
Rolled 32 (1d100)

>>3528161
>>
>>3528165
M E D I O C R I T Y

>61
It’s a random encounter!
>Roll 1d100, best of 3 again, to see who the flipping flip it is.
If you manage to roll 98+ I’ll make it Smoker or Sengoku, just because you’re not gonna roll over 70 anyway.
>>
Rolled 48 (1d100)

>>3528170
Is that a challenge?
>>
Rolled 29 (1d100)

>>3528170
Mediocrity pls go
>>
Rolled 34 (1d100)

>>3528170
You just jinxed it
>>
Rolled 9 (1d100)

>>3528170
Fucking lol mediocrity.
>>
Rolled 68 (1d100)

>>3528170
>>3528171
>>3528172
>>3528173
Oof, she was right
Rolling for the lols
Inb4 nat100
>>
Rolled 35, 45, 59, 61, 39, 56, 22, 3, 89, 76 = 485 (10d100)

Removing mediocrity

>>3528181
STILL goddamn mediocre
Dice reeeeeeeeee
>>
Rolled 88, 82, 19, 20, 27, 10, 78, 5, 29, 40, 29, 80, 78, 98, 13, 89, 2, 15, 12, 46 = 860 (20d100)

Curse breaking roll
>>
>>3528181
Not even past 70
>>
>>3528181
what the fuck
Does BPQM have the luck-luck fruit and has been refraining from using it outside of Silvers' threads, or what?
>>
>>3528186
>>3528187
They're STILL below median fuuuuuuuuuuucccccckkkkkk
>>
>>3528171
Not even OnePieceBaka can save Silvers Harry from his incredible averageness!

>48

“Stefan! Get back here, you’re too faAAACK!”

You were aware of the split in the corridor up ahead, really - it’s just that your own own running and yelling was too loud for you to hear what’s must have been footsteps coming from along said split.

You run straight into the person stepping out, or more precisely, the giant pile of paperwork they’re carrying.

The pair of you go down, but the paperwork up - and around - and pretty much everywhere, in fact, pristine sheets of paper fluttering through the air in a flurry of dead trees.

“You idiot!”

You lift your head from the floor, turning it to see a furious Marine - infantry - pushing herself to her feet, amidst the remaining sheets floating gently to the ground.

“What are you DOING, running around like a- who are you?!” She glares down at you, snatching a now-rumpled page before it can land on her head,

“Borf?” Stefan’s head, tilted in curiosity, appears from around a corner ahead.

>I’m... a contractor. Here to repair... stuff.
>That’s classified, soldier!
>... I’m lost.
>Other?


Rollin’ for mediocrity.
>>
Rolled 16 (1d100)

>>3528196
So medicore I misspelt dice! Incredible!
>>
>>3528196
>"I'm TRYING to get My Very Good Boy Dog back."
>>
>>3528196
>>That’s classified, soldier!
I hope Silvers can learn to bullshit like Flashy.
>>
Rolled 72 (1d100)

>>3528196
>Flirt
You can't stop me from thirsting QM

>Inb4 super mediocre
>>
>>3528201
>above-average
Fucking hell, Silvers really is just bizarro Flashy isn't he?
>>
>>3528196
>>3528201
Shit, you might be onto something. Maybe Silvers Harry threads are opposite day threads.
+1
>>
>>3528196
>>That’s classified, soldier!
>>
>>3528202
>>3528204
>>3528207
Maybe... Maybe Silvers is Flashy Alter?
>>
>>3528196
>>That’s classified, soldier!
You only have one weapon and are a paperpusher. I have many weapons ergo I am of higher ranking.

And happy b-day tomorrow QM. Coincidentally, it'll also be mine. Coincidentally again, I'll also be drinking myself to death. To Gun X Glory's return and poorly functioning livers!
>>
>>3528196
>>3528201
+1 to flirt
Only to stun or bamboozle tho
No lewd in this Christian Minecraft thread
>>
You know what? If you guys can get above 80, I’ll allow Silvers to flirt with people. If you get above 90, I’ll actually allow him to maybe, possibly get a waifu.

If you nat 100, I’ll let you seduce Hina or something. But still not Tashigi.

>ROLL 1D100, BEST OF 3

Currently writing for ‘classified’, but let’s see whether Silvers Flashy really is the anti-Flash.
>>
>>3528217
Wait, wait... 3 to classified and 3 to flirt. Waiting for tie-breaker.
>>
Rolled 72 (1d100)

>>3528217
I would say ANTI-JUSTICE, but last time I tried to roll for JUSTICE I got a nat 1, so...
>>
Rolled 1 (1d100)

Waifu time
>>
>>3528222
Sounds about right
>>
>Flirt
>>
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>>3528222
>>
>>3528222
Quick, someone roll a nat100 to counteract this!
>>
>>3528222
GOD

DAMMIT
>>
Rolled 18 (1d100)

>>3528217
>>3528222
Wew. Here's the counter-jinx.
>>
Rolled 34 (1d100)

>>3528217
FLIRT DAMN YOU DICE FLIIIIIIIRRRRRRRTTTTTTT
>>
>>3528222
This is the best birthday gift ever, thank you so much. I’ll treasure it forever, after I’m done laughing my guts up.

Well, thanks to >>3528226 it looks like you’re voting to flirt. I’ll allow it this once as I kind of already said you could, and thanks to this brilliant natural seductive ability of yours, you’ll have a -10 malus to it.

>Roll 1d100, best of 3 to hit on this poor Marine.
If you guys want to vote for a pick-up line too, feel free.
>>
Rolled 61 (1d100)

>>3528222
rolling for stefan getting a waifu
>>
Rolled 82 (1d100)

I'll redeem myself for the chance at a waifu
>>
Rolled 7 (1d100)

>>3528242
>>
Rolled 46 (1d100)

>>3528242
Time for you to die of either a heart attack or side-implosion.
>>
>>3528209
Also, HAPPY BIRTHDAY FELLOW GxG FAN, LET US DESTROY OUR LIVERS TOGETHER. Or lives. One of the two.
>>
Rolled 28 (1d100)

>>3528242
Has to be an a absolutely awful line either way
>>
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>>3528222
In a sudden turn of events, Hina seduces Silvers Harry.
>>
Rolled 72 (1d100)

>>3528242
>The sea is blue, the sky is too.
>I'm the man that fell for you.
>>
>>3528249
Or not, fuck.
Maybe I should just stop trying to predict my rolls.
>>
Rolled 4 (1d100)

>>3528246
Not actually that bad. Although think of poor Smoboss who’s dreaming this shit. You really want him to dream of you seducing someone? Really? Poor papaSmo gonna be in therapy for a long time...

>>3528253
absolutely awful

Any more votes for lines?
Rolling for her flirtation-resistance, needs to beat 72 to resist your wiles (haha, Flashy with wiles, haha).
>>
>>3528264
Well, fuck.
>>
>>3528264
THE POWER OF SLICK RHYMES
>>
>>3528264
Wait, did we actually manage to seduce someone? With a fucking nat 1?
...Silvers IS bizarro Flashy.
>>
>>3528264
>>3528269
Holy Fuck Silvers really IS a smooth operator

That -10 seems like a +10
>>
>>3528264
>We actually seduce someone
In that case I absolutely vote for
>>3528253
>>
>>3528264
>Smoboss dreaming of us as a pirate when a darkness logia
>Flashy rejoins him in after Skypeia having joined a pirate crew and with light(ning) logia
How hard is he gonna flip
>>
>>3528270
>>3528272
>>3528273
No, she just has shit taste. Although considering I’d already come up with most of her character, it fits.

Anyhoo, are we going with that seductive rhyme, or any other votes for what to say to her?
Also: fingerguns yay/nay
>>
>>3528264
I think I know why Silvers is thirst worthy

He has the Sexy Rayleigh Smirk™ he got from his old man
>>
>>3528285
I guess since this is actually happening, no fingerguns. Silvers don't do no fingerguns.
>>
>I knew it! the Angel-Angel Fruit is real!
>>
>>3528285
>Also: fingerguns yay/yay
I don't understand this question. How are we supposed to choose?
>>
>>3528285
Fingerguns yay, but they have to be SIDEWAYS fingerguns. Because bizarro, or something.
>>
>>3528285
Yes. All Flashmen have finger guns. It's how they identify each other.
>>
>>3528285
Hey what do you call a beautiful Marine? She's looking at me but I don't know what to say to her *sexy smirk*
>>
Rolled 67 (1d100)

Rolling for STUFF.
>>
>>3528285
>Although considering I’d already come up with most of her character, it fits.
Did we manage to seduce the Phantom?
>>
>

You stare up at her from your graceful position on the floor, sheets scattered around you.

This Marine glaring down at you... is hot.

Yeah. You’re gonna go for it. You’re Silvers ‘Sexy Everything’ Harry, and just because dad’s lessons failed to work on Sabaody doesn’t mean they won’t work everywhere, right?

You flash her the Sexy Silvers Smirk, flicking your fingers into guns, the better to penetrate her heart with. In a non-murdery way. Smooth, Silvers. Smooooth.

“The sea is blue, the sky is too,” you tell her, in your suave and manly voice, eyebrows waggling like the most erotic caterpillars chowing down on the delicious leaves of W A N T O N D E B A U C H E R Y. “I’m the man... that fell for you.”

The ferocious scowl changed first to confusion; then realization; and then, because Calm Belt girls clearly have better taste than Sabaody girls, a brilliant flush spreads over her cheeks,

“Th-that’s too fast!” Her hands rise to clap against her burning cheeks as her eyes widen. “How indecent! Y-you haven’t even asked my father permission to court me!”

Stefan cocks his head further, confused by everything.

>Yes I did.
>We don’t need your father’s permission! Nothing can stand in the way of Love!
>Yeah, well you haven’t asked MY father’s permission to be courted by me, so we’re even!
>Other?
>>
>>3528329
>>Yeah, well you haven’t asked MY father’s permission to be courted by me, so we’re even!
maximum dingus engaged
>>
>>3528329
>We don’t need your father’s permission! Nothing can stand in the way of Love!
>That shiny smile ping
>>
Please QM, let Flashman flirt with every hot girl he sees as an excuse to make random encounters, just to see how he fails horribly, then shouts them he's seeking for pirates as an excuse (then roll for finding pirates).
>Hot girl in the pier.
>Flashman tries to flirt using his new deluxe candy.
F: Hey beautiful, have you...
>She get's up and leaves.
F:...PIRATES, HAVE YOU SEEN PIRATES HERE.
>nat100.
>She starts running and screaming.
>Flashman sighs, turns around and sees the whole crew of the Big Mom pirates.
>Big Mom is there, she's drooling while mumbling something about deluxe candy. Are those spirals in her eyes?.
>Flashy think something, use you're inhuman bullshit abilities to...
F: NO.MINE.
>Fuck.
It ends up that the only reason the famous prettyboy marine can't flirt is that every time he tries, an important pirate crew cokblocks him.
>He ends up being the most condecorated Admiral of the Marine history.
>Cries uncontrollably while reciving medals.
Sengoku: Look at him, so humble, every time he gets recognition for his merits he cries from gratitude.
>Anti-pirate crusade feels intensifies.
>>
>>3528329
>Well if we're going to court, I'd have to arrest you...for stealing my heart. Im sure your father would understand.

Sabaody girls are just to used to Papa's antics.
>>
>>3528329
>>We don’t need your father’s permission! Nothing can stand in the way of Love!
Do we have sparkles and rose petals flying in the background?
>>
>>3528329
>Yeah, well you haven’t asked MY father’s permission to be courted by me, so we’re even!
>>
>>3528341
Yes. Yes, you do.

>>3528338
no waifu 4 flashy, only weapons
>zoro approval intensifies as long as it’s swords
>>
We’re on 2-2 for your own dad’s permission and nothing standing in the way of love.

Tiebreaker?
>>
>>3528329
>And you didn't ask permission to steal my heart
>>
>>3528358

>>We don’t need your father’s permission! Nothing can stand in the way of Love!
>>
>Yeah, well you haven’t asked MY father’s permission to be courted by me, so we’re even!
>>
>>3528372
Sorry, I went for first tie-breaker.

>twu wuv

“We don’t need your father’s permission!” You push yourself to your feet, ignoring the weird fall of cherry blossoms behind you as you lunge forwards, clutching her by her raised forearms Stefan lets out a ‘bwohw?’. “Nothing can stand in the way of Love!”

Hot Marine Chick Who Is Totally Into You stares up at you with shimmering eyes, lips parted in amazement at this totally true and not at all bullshit fact you’ve pulled from your heart. “That’s just like in The Maiden’s Escape volume two...”

“Huh?”

“N-nothing!” Releasing her flushed cheeks, she looks away, eyelashes fluttering. “All right! I’ll allow it! I’ll permit you to court me!”

>Sweet! ... How?
>(BSOD as you realize you’ve never got this far and no idea what to do next oh shit who is this woman)
>Great! How about for our first date, we catch my dog and pick up your papers?
>Other?
>>
>>3528393
>Great! How about for our first date, we catch my dog and pick up your papers?
>>
>>3528393
>great, for our first date we'll pick up your papers, catch my dog, and run away together!

>First crewmate secured
>>
>>3528393
>Great! How about for our first date, we catch my dog and pick up your papers?
Recruit marine girl. Take her with us in our pirate escapades, like in her romance novels.
>>
>>3528393
>(BSOD as you realize you’ve never got this far and no idea what to do next oh shit who is this woman)
>Great! How about for our first date, we catch my dog and pick up your papers?
>>
>>3528393
>>Great! How about for our first date, we catch my dog and pick up your papers?
This is almost as good as Dad's idea of a date being going to the bar and having his date pick up the bill
>>
>>3528393
>(BSOD as you realize you’ve never got this far and no idea what to do next oh shit who is this woman)
>Great! How about for our first date, we catch my dog and pick up your papers?

Bonus points if she gets concerned about how long her dashing suitor spent staring at a wall having a totally-not-panic-attack.
>>
Oh no.
Her heart's going to break when she realizes that Harry's a would-be pirate.

...She's totally going to start working her way up the ranks so she can chase after Flashy, isn't she?
>>
>>3528393
>Great! How about for our first date, we catch my dog and pick up your papers?
>Then once your affairs are in order we can elope! It would ever so burden my heart if I were to part with you, as my time on this island is short.
>>
>>3528416
Inb4 she joins us trying to get us to convert to Justice but keeps swooning
>>
>>3528416
>
A start crosed love between a Marine and a Pirate, enemies that still yearn for each other, each of them dreaming of the day they will convert the other to their side. Given how she seems obsessed with romance novels there's a good chance us being a pirate is one of her dream scenarios
>>
>>3528416
Heartbreak? No no no, this is just like Prince of the Blue Volume 7! Where a valiant Pirate Prince sweeps the heroine off her feet and into a world of adventure to reclaim his birthrite with her as his princess!
>>
>>3528416
>"That’s just like in The Maiden’s Escape volume two...”
She'd 100% still be head over heels: the perfect forbidden romance of star-crossed lovers. She'd love it.
>>
>>3528393
>>(BSOD as you realize you’ve never got this far and no idea what to do next oh shit who is this woman)
>>
>>3528393
>Great! How about for our first date, we catch my dog and pick up your papers?, also something with candles and wine.
>>
>>3528427
EH! Wrong

This is actually like volume 3 of sea rouge where the dashing pirate takes the loyal marine girl on a perilous adventure upon which she must develop, will she follow the law she has sworn to uphold?
Or maybe she'll just follow the heart that was stolen by the dashing pirate captain
>>
>>3528416
She will let herself get "captured" by the pirate.
>>
>hehehehe

“Great! How about for our first date, we catch my dog and pick up your papers?” You are totally killing this romance shit. Dad’s going to be so proud. Mom will... probably laugh a lot. Like normal.

“Yes! Teamwork is an important part of any relationship!” Hot Marine Chick gets the cutest stubborn look as she fistpumps. “I, Sakazuki Masayoshi, will assist perfectly, and prove myself worthy of wifehood!”

“... k.” Wow, she sure is enthusiastic! Although you don’t really get the wifehood part. Does that involve a lot of dog-catching? Weird. More importantly, you have a maybe-sort-of potential girlfriend!

>(Introduce yourself! With your real name.)
>(Introduce yourself! With a fake name (what?))
>All right, let’s pick these papers up!
>All right, let’s catch Stefan!
>Other?
>>
Wait... He is the anti-flash. Seduces people, has a darkness power... Does that mean he does the kidnapping? He already kidnapped a dog.
>>
>>3528445
>>(Introduce yourself! With your real name.)
>>
>>3528445
... Akainus daughter. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST YOU MADMAN!
>>
>>3528445
>(Introduce yourself! With your real name.)
Hahaha
>>
>>3528453
huehuehuehuehue
>>
>>3528445
>(Introduce yourself! With your real name.)
>All right, let’s pick these papers up!
>>
File: GameOver.gif (977 KB, 500x300)
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>>3528453
...
N-no!
AAAAAAAAA
>>
>>3528453
AHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
...fuckahahahahahahh
...ohnohahahahahah
We're going to die.
>>
>>3528445
>(Introduce yourself! With your real name.)
>All right, let’s pick these papers up!
Completely blow past any questions she might have about our heritage

>>3528448
....Oh wow. There's a lot more than just mediocrity and crit rolls.

>>3528453
It's great, ain't it? An aneurysm isn't quite the way I wanted to kill him but this works.
>>
>>3528457
>waifuing the daughter of the (future) fleet admiral

Pretty much what's expected of silver's harry, son of silver's rayleigh
>>
>>3528453
Okay, now I'm 100% on board with taking her with us.

>>3528445
>(Introduce yourself! With your real name.)
>All right, let’s catch Stefan!
>>
>>3528445
>(Introduce yourself! With your real name.)
A man doesn't lie to a lady after all.
>If she asks about your family tell her about the amnesia
>>
>>3528448
>kidnaps FUCKING Whitebeard's dog
>as a result the Whitebeard Pirates are looking for him
You know I think the only way to top this is if we convince her to come with us... or also kidnap her.
LETS GET THAT ONE HUNDRED MILLION BOUNTY MY GUYS.
>>
>>3528445
I leave for one day, and you guys seduced Akainu's daughter. The fuck.
>>(Introduce yourself! With your real name.)
A good relationship is built on honesty. (Also her reaction would be great.)
>>
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>>3528445
>>(Introduce yourself! With your real name.)
>>All right, let’s pick these papers up!
...Akainu managed to breed.
Oh dear.
>>
>>3528468
We are full blown shoujo manga now.
>Mysterious handsome stranger? Check.
>Pure hearted Marine recruit? Check.
>Star crossed paths? Check.
>Family on opposite sides of the law? Big ol' check.
I can see nothing going wrong with this. Absolutely nothing.
>>
>>3528470
Rayleigh is gonna laugh his fucking ass off at the next headline
>SON OF SILVERS RAYLEIGH KIDNAP ADMIRAL'S DAUGHTER
Meanwhile our escorts have already lost the energy to be exasperated
>>
>>3528493
>Family on opposite sides of the law?
Oh geez, Rayleigh is going to laugh his lungs out when he hears about this.
And Akainu is going to burn down wherever he is at the time of hearing the news.
>>
>>3528477
Who we can kidnap/seduce next after this? More admiral daughters? A celestial dragon? ALL Charlotte's daughters?
>>
>>3528453
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...wait, you are serious, let me laugh harder HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
On a side note, if someone can survive Akainu's wrath is the user of the Yami Yami nomi, nullify his powers and turn a mortal beating into a regular beating. Also: Admiral's daughter gets kidnapped by a pirate. Local marines say they heard her scream "Oh no, I'm getting kidnapped by this handsome pirate, hope he does not carry me in his strong arms, holding me thigtly against his sculpted body like in The Maiden's scape volume three part one".
>Akainu facepalms so hard he causes eruptions all over the Grand line.
>>
>>3528494
>DAUGHTER OF ADMIRAL AKAINU SUFFERING FROM STOCKHOLM!?

>FIRST EVER MEETING BETWEEN THE FACTIONS OF REDHAIRED SHANKS, WHITEBEARD PIRATES, THE SHIKIBUKAI AND THE ADMIRALS...ALL JOINING TOGETHER TO ATTEND THE WEDDING OF :

PIRATE-SILVERS HARRY
MARINE-SAKAZUKI MAYOSHI
>>
>>3528497
If Flashman is Smoboss cigar smoking intensifies, then Silvers is Rayleigh laughter intensifies.

Now the question is what is greater. Akainu's justice boner or his daughter's happiness.
>>
>>3528503
Are you not happy with the Marines AND the Whitebeard pirates after us?
We're a walking Marineford waiting to happen.
>>
>>3528519
Absolute Justice Boner.
>>
>>3528520
Of course not. This isn't even about waifus. This is about sending a message.

This Flash needs to be the most hated pirate ever without actually attacking civilians.
>>
Rolled 30, 92 = 122 (2d100)

>names will come up. eventually.

“Oh! By the way, I’m Silvers Harry!” You let her go, reaching out a hand for her to shake instead. “Nice to court you!”

“You too!” Ooh, good grip. Her flush is mostly gone now, face determined. “Let’s work hard together!”

“And play hard, too!”

“S-so fast...!” She glances away, cheeks once again reddening furiously, as she fans herself with the other hand. Weird. “And yet~”

“All right, let’s get these papers picked up!” You release her suddenly limp hand, crouching down to start grabbing at the sheets. It looks like Stefan isn’t going anywhere, instead sulking that you’re not chasing him. Understandable, but Hot Chicks Who Are Into You are way harder to find than bounties! Priorities, Stefan! Priorities!

“Yes! I will complete this task, no matter the consequences!!” Masayoshi (you can use her first name, right? You’re dating now? You think? How does this work?) drops to her knees, grabbing the papers near her. You’re not sure what consequences are supposed to be for not picking up paper, but who knows how Marines work? Maybe they get beaten. With sticks.

>Roll 1d100, best of 3 to accidentally reach for the same paper at the same time, thus throwing Sakazuki Masayoshi 100% into shoujo-world

Rolling for STUFF
>>
Rolled 23 (1d100)

>>3528534
>>
Rolled 81 (1d100)

>>3528534
>>
>>3528534
>92
oh no
>>
Rolled 18 (1d100)

>>3528534
FULL SHOUJO LET'S GO
>>
Rolled 78 (1d100)

>>3528534
>>
>>3528532
>You have commited crimes against Mariejois and her people. What say you.
>"I'm marrying your daughter Fleet Admiral!"
>>
>>3528538
...w-whats the 92 for boss?
>>
>>3528542
Well name our first kid after you if you let me go!
>>
>>3528542
>Also, she calls me daddy too.
If we are going to die, we die like a PRO.
>>
>>3528503
Big Mom will will try to kill us not because we kidnapped one of her daughters, but because we manage to successfully waifu a Giant before she does.

>>3528542
Just change Fleet Admiral to Father, to really set him off. ...I just realized this version of Flashman would have multiple Father-in-laws instead.
>>
All right, guys, gotta go. I have zero internet, but will attempt to get online tomorrow, because lololololol that 92 ur fukked.

Good evening all, thanks for playing, and apologies for my days of suckiness.

>>3528549
Let’s say it involves Akainu.
On the bright side, the 30 means the Redhaired pirates haven’t got into any trouble in town, so there’s that!

If you guys want to find some pictures of Masayoshi and vote for appearance (black hair, about your age, anything else goes), feel free. I WILL RETURN.
>>
>>3528538
Shoujo drama roll!
>>
>>3528557
>I just realized this version of Flashman would have multiple Father-in-laws instead.

Oh, fuck. It's all part of being anti-flash. He is the one kidnapping, he gets father-in-law...
>>
>>3528566
Oh no, Akainu is going to be in town.
Akainu is going to overhear us.
Oh no.
Oh no no.
I didn't sign up for this.
Oh god. Save me Whitebeard.
>>
on the plus side our first bounty is gonna be fucking legendary, hunted by WB for recruitment and theft, hunted by Akainu for seducing his daughter. if we don't break 150 million im gonna be surprised
>>
>>3528566
Night BP

One possible image is Satsuki from Kill la Kill
>>
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>>3528577
I'd tell you not to worry and believe in the might of the crits...
But sadly, this is a Silvers Harry thread, where mediocrity rules.

We are neck-deep in shit.
>>
>>3528588
That was my first thought as well. But she didn't seem Shoujo enough. The next immediate thought was Kunieda from Beelzebub. Same sort of vibe as Satsuki, but much weaker to romance.
>>
This, but younger (or not, this is One Piece, where looks and age aren't related)
>>
>>3528595
Y'know what, I think I'm going to agree with you on this one Satan. Put me down for Kunieda
>>
>>3528595
Supporting Satan here.
I can't believe we fell straight into the spider's trap and decided to waifu what may well be a nuclear bomb as far as our life expectancy is concerned.
FUCK IT.
WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG.
>>
>>3528604
Shit, this is too good. Gotta support this.
>>
>>3528588
Supporting the eye-brows of justice
>>
Hey guys, what'd I miss--

...Oh shit.
>>
I dont really follow One Piece, someone tell me how bad it is.
Is it scarier to know or to not know?
>>
>>3528720
Ok so basically the third strongest guy in the marines (The strongest two don't really do anything and later in the series pretty much resign) hates pirates with a burning passion.
His Justice Boner is harder than diamond.
This is his daughter.
>>
>>3528734
Oh.
I now see the need to panic.
>>
>>3528734
You forgot to mention he's more or less living magma, and is responsible for one of the largest losses in Luffy's life.
>>
>>3528720
>>3528734

He's also the kind of man who would have absolutely 0 qualms about murdering his daughter if she legit fell in love with a pirate.

Like, he'd maybe ask her to stop this foolishness once, and if she said no, he' punch a whole through her chest.

The dude is fucking crazy and is a large part of why the bad marines are REALLY fucking bad.
>>
>>3528734
>>3528751
>>3528773
It was better to not know. You've instilled in me a great fear for Harry's safety
>>
Rolled 48 (1d100)

>>3528445
BPQM, you've fucking broke me with this one. God damnit. What the flying fuck. The daughter of one of the most powerful, AND most cruel and villainous characters in One Piece is now our waifu?

Ok.

We're gunna get Ace'd.
>>
>>3528781
Well, BPQM is against waifus and romance, so if we seduce one it has to turn the quest into LUNATIC mode.
>>
>>3528793
You know what? I'm fine with that. Let's fucking do it. We get a cute waifu, and in exchange, we enter Harry Must Die mode. Let's get CRAZY.
>>
>>3528781
She played us. Like a goddamned fiddle. She knew what we would do, she laid her trap and just waited.
>>
>>3528781
>>3528800
There is a single, clear and simple solution to all this madness.

When her Akainu finds out and then finds US, we challenge him to a fight for a right to marry his daughter.
>>
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>>3528853
>>
>>3528924
Man, that's gonna be a goddamn death match. We'd lose too. Even if we mess with his DF thanks to our own, he's probably still strong as a normal human. Rolls 5d100s or something.
>>
>>3528793
I still don't get why she's against Flashy getting a girlfriend. Writing lewds is unconfortable and I get why she doesn't want to (she doesn't have to), but the dice gods demanded a true love story, not a lewd one. She could write a platonic love story with Flashman and some marine girl destined in another sea with another crew so she appears in few special ocassions, like large Marine meetings/battles. This would be a player-friendly way of cutting off lewds instead of saying "asexual" or HARDCORE MODE ACTIVATED (please leave joke lewds like Merri X White Mist) and could add interesting (and cute) interactions. Also making her to Akainu what Flashman is to Smoboss for maximum kek and timeline shenanigans.
I'm just making suggestions to solve the waifu problem while making both sides happy, but this is QM's story and I'll stick to whatever she says.
Also, why did you got the poor Silver "Average roll" Harry a death by combustion by pairing him with Mr. magmafist's daughter. RIP Harry, a shot in the head couldn't kill you but love did. =(
>>
>>3528954
If a waifu means no more Tarzan yells, I'm fine with waiting on the waifu for a decade or so.
>>
>>3528954
I think she does write lewds, but not romance. Maybe she wants a quest with no romance, or to get rid of all the waifu wars by getting rid of all waifus. A bit of an overcompensation in my opinion but it's her quest and it's still fun without waifus.

But maybe this noncanon-flash can actually find love without getting in the way of the main story.
>>
>>3528954
>a platonic love story with Flashman and some marine girl destined in another sea with another crew so she appears in few special ocassions
Change 'marine' for 'pirate' as dice gods intended and you have about what I wanted, a cute, shenenigans-filled love sidestory, where both Flashy and piratelady clearly have feelings for one another but both refuse to drop their way of life(marine duty and piracy respectively) so their relationship becomes a prolonged game of cat and mouse.
Then after the quest ends, you have a timeskip to them rising their kids, pirateladys jolly rodger and Flashmans marine coat hanging together on a wall.
>>
>>3528969
If getting a gf for Flashman will anger QM then I'll stop suggesting ways to do it. The last thing I want is making a QM burn and quit, but most quests have waifus because most anons want them, so there will always be the typical anon that pushes for them.
>>
>>3528954
>I still don't get why she's against Flashy getting a girlfriend.
Because 100% of the time the quest turns into cancerous waifu fagging when the protag gets a girlfriend. Also you know there'll be countless calls for lewds every goddamn thread, which will get old fast.

>If getting a gf for Flashman will anger QM then I'll stop suggesting ways to do it
QM has said no romance multiple times before if you check past threads, so yeah suggesting it will piss them off.

[spoiler[Super unpopular opinion: all the dice god bullshit is annoying as well, and I hate these side story threads for even spawning it in the first place.[/spoiler]
>>
>>3529020
Nice spoiler retard.
>you know there'll be countless calls for lewds every goddamn thread
Literally only ever happens if a QM actually writes lewds and I've never seen "countless calls" regardless.
>>
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>>3528954
Word of Oda too. The only Romance in One Piece is the Romance of Adventure. We dont need waifus.
>>
>>3529020
I get it, no waifus ever in this quest, but there is no need or being rude, I alredy apologized. Also, better a side story than no quest at all (unless not doing side stories would help the QM to catch up with the anime faster and thus post the main quest sooner)
>>
What is Gun X Glory?
if it is something new to start reading I'm always on the look out.
>>
>>3529146
It's basically "Retired old veteran with a bar(/cafe/arcade): vidya gaem edition" Quest even though the protag's only like 21 but whatever
It's pretty good so far, although I've only read the first of three threads for it (the third thread is in progress right now)
>>
>>3528595
I am 110% all for Kunieda

but Imagine for a second

>Waifu is Kunieda
>We're named Silvers
>Kinda pervy dumbass but a good guy
>Randomly pick up demon lord baby doggo
>We probably have silver hair
>OH FUCK WE'RE FURUICHI
>HAHAHAHAHA
>>
>>3530646
Silvers Harry, Captain of the 34 Pillar Division.
>We escape Akainu with daughter in tow, safely make it to East Blue
>Welp, time to build a crew!
>Searching for Navigator, find a devil fruit user. It's Alaindelon
>>
>>3529146
>>3530017
It's on the fourth thread now OnePieceBaka.

GxG is 'bout some ex-pro of some kind of gun SAO, who gets blackmailed, threatened and attacked by people who take the game way too seriously.
I'd recommend giving it a read anon.
>>
>>3528595
... hot.

>>3529058
Non-canon interludes such as this serve a few purposes - it means I can refresh my memory of the arc ahead and also give me time to plan stuff (although I shouldn’t bother, you assholes will just nat100 those plans to smithereens anyway), it prevents me getting burned out on regular Flashy, and gives me a chance to throw any form of logic out of the window and just have a crack-filled time of no-consequences bullshit. Also it gets to traumatise Smoboss in regular thread.

Writing.
>>
>81 shoujo, kyaaa~

The papers you’re grabbing aren’t of any real interest to you - Weird Boring Marine Stuff - but despite the quantity, the pair of you are retrieving them quickly, because TEAMWORK. Apparently. Or that’s what she said, and she seems to have a better idea of how relationship work than you, so you’ll follow her lead in that one.

It’s when you’re down to the last dozen or so sheets that the teamwork breaks down slightly, as each of you reaches a hand towards the same sheet (a summary of latest requests by the janitorial staff, apparently).

Unlike your previous handshake, your hands touch in a less professional manner as your hand casually rests on top of hers, the pair of you turning to stare at the sudden touch.

Masayoshi’s eyes widen as you look up at her face, other hand rising to her trembling mouth. “S-so... forward...! And in public...!

“Uh, sor-?”

She wobbles. Then her eyes roll up into her head as she topples over to the side, hitting the tiled floor with a graceless thunk. It’s not quite the most elegant swoon you’ve ever seen. Or any kind of graceful, in fact.

“... -ry?” You finish, staring down at the passed out Marine, papers still clutched in her hand, and a trickle of blood emerging from her nose. What the hell? She definitely didn’t hit her head THAT hard.

“Bwuff...” Stefan laments, wandering over to sniff at her hair.

“That was an accident,” you tell him, entirely honest (and confused), at which point the unmistakeable sound of a Den-Den starts ringing, muffled, from her pocket.

>... Screw this, you have a Phantom to track!
>Answer the Den Den.
>Ignore the Den Den, but you should probably drag her into a room or something...
>Other?
>>
>>3532756
>Answer the Den Den.
What could go wrong.
I for one want to see if a receiving Den Den can immolate due to the sheer rage coming from the other side.
>>
>>3532756
>Answer the Den Den.
Moshi-moshi.
>>
>>3532756
What could go wrong.
>>
>>3532756
>>Answer the Den Den.
"Shush, she's asleep."
Immediately hang up.
>>
>>3532756
>>Ignore the Den Den, but you should probably drag her into a room or something...
This hole is pretty deep, right?
But it could still be deeper.
>>
>>3532767
kek. Supporting.
>>
>>3532756
>Answer the Den Den while you bridal carry her. Continue seeking for Phantom.
>>
>>3523198
Has nearly collar bones like me
>>
>>3523198
How the fuck did I miss this, apparently I skim too much or something? ANYWAY, looks pretty good to me, including his earlobes of ick! Unfortunately you seem to be missing the giant not-sword impaling you and the blood spurting out of his mouth, so 2/10, shamefur dispray.

>oh dear

Hmmm. That... could be important. You think. You look first at Masayoshi - she’s twitching slightly, eyelids fluttering as the nosebleed continues... looks weirdly content for an unconscious woman - before you shrug, and reach into her jacket pocket. Nope - maybe another one? No... oh, there it is.

Aww, cute Den Den. It peers up at you with a surprising lack of concern for being handled by some guy it’s never seen, burbling its ringtone instead.

You answer it, while Masayoshi murmurs something about ‘no, not there’.

“Finally!” The Den Den’s face becomes a distinctly uncute glare, to match its uncute, snappish tone. “Didn’t I tell you I’d be calling today? Answer faster in future.”

>Sorry, it took a while to search her clothes.
>That’s not a nice way to talk to my girlfriend...
>... You sound like a dick. (Hang up.)
>Other?
>>
>>3532790
>>3532767
>>
>>3532790
>Sorry, I forgot.
>>
>>3532790

>>Sorry, it took a while to search her clothes.

When he loses his mind and starts yelling

>>... You sound like a dick. (Hang up.)
>>
>That’s not a nice way to talk to my girlfriend...
>>
>>3532790
>Sorry, wrong number.
>>
>>3532790
>Sorry, it took a while to search her clothes.
>>
>>3532790
>excuse me,but my fiance is currently sleeping, call back later please

CLICK
>>
Rolled 69 (1d100)

background stuff
>>
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>>3532801
>>
>>3532801
oh my

Not while she’s unconscious, you pervert!
>>
>>3532800
Changing my vote to this
>>
2 for search her clothes, 2 for muh fiancée. Or fiancé. I I think two e’s is female? Hm. Anyway, tie.
>>
>>3532800
Support.
I hope this gives him a heart attack.
>>
>>3532797
Should mention I've switched from this joke response.
Do Den Dens even have numbers?
>>
>>3532800
Support.
>>
>>3532801
Hahaha Fate itself is trying to make this woman our wife, Genocidal Dad or no!

If normal Flashman threads' dice are firm on going full shounen, Silvers' dice are making us go full shoujo and I love it
>>
>>3532800
Supporting
>>
Rolled 100 (1d100)

>>3532813
I’m going with yes, because I’m lazy. I’m pretty sure it’s numbers that get set into their shell-thingies, anyway. ... Look, I don’t get paid for this, okay? I do SOME research! sometimes!

>it IS two e’s for women, so i now consider myself fluent in french, oui, oui, baguette, etc

You scowl. That’s a goddamn rude way to talk to anyone, but you’re definitely not going to allow it to happen to your new girlfriend! In fact, she said something about wifehood earlier, so you guess she’s your fiancée, maybe? Yeah, that sounds right.

“Excuse me,” you retort, snideness simmering behind your totally polite language, “but my fiancée is currently sleeping. Call back later, please.”

There! That told HIM, whoever Asshole-dude is. You nod in pleasure at a job well done and a fiancée defended, while spluttering sounds emerge from the other end. “Yo- WHO IS TH-“

You hang up, Den Den’s face returning to sleepy cuteness. Awwww.

“... how naughty...” Masayoshi murmurs, wiggling slightly, face still heated. You should really do something about that nosebleed.

>Shove her in a room for now, you can hunt down the Phantom and pick her up later!
>Sling her over your shoulders, you can totally hunt the Phantom while doing so. You’re STRONK.
>See if her Den Den has enough range to call your Dad-person. You’ve been getting a few vague memories back, and he’ll definitely know what to do, probably, maybe!
>Other?
>>
>>3532840
>>Sling her over your shoulders, you can totally hunt the Phantom while doing so. You’re STRONK.

AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH
>>
>>3532840
>>Sling her over your shoulders, you can totally hunt the Phantom while doing so. You’re STRONK.

>100
oh boy, what fresh hell is about to delete silvers from existence?
>>
If we are a white beard now and Akainu is going to kill us, are we the new Ace?
Also this will happen as soon as Whitebeard arrives.
>>
>>3532840
......OH NO THAT 100 FOR WHITEBEARD PIRATES

lol nice ur doublefucked
>>
>>3532840
>>Sling her over your shoulders, you can totally hunt the Phantom while doing so. You’re STRONK.

>100
PANIC?
>>
File: 1457937309794.png (27 KB, 256x192)
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>>3532847
>ID is the same
>Tripcode is different
>>
>>3532847
>NOW BOTH OUR DADS ARE GOING TO FIGHT OVER WHO GETS TO BE THE BEST MAN!

(it's stefan)
>>
>>3532851
I did one hash instead of two, oopsie.

I should probably get a new trip, honestly, this one’s pretty easy to guess.
>>
>>3532853
What if we give a Yami handshake to both before the fight so they don't sink the whole island.
>>
>>3532840
>Sling her over your shoulders, you can totally hunt the Phantom while doing so. You’re STRONK.
>See if her Den Den has enough range to call your Dad-person. You’ve been getting a few vague memories back, and he’ll definitely know what to do, probably, maybe!
>*Rayleigh Laughter intensifies*
>>
>>3532847
Uh oh.
>>
>>3532847
HI ACE
BYE ACE
>>
Rolled 23 (1d100)

>lol dat 100

Well, you’re STRONK. And you can’t just leave your shiny new fiancée lying around in a hallway, right? Someone might, you dunno, steal her paperwork or something. Marines like paperwork right? That’s why they make so much of it.

You can totally understand. Who WOULDN’T love paperwork?

She’s thankfully not too heavy, even carrying Guts, Griffith, and all your other metal beauties along with her. Hefting her takes little work, and you sling her over a shoulder easily enough, leaving a small puddle of blood on the floor.

After a second of thought, you roll up and squeeze the now mostly-neat bundle of paperwork into your biggest pocket, the top half sticking out uncomfortably. Eh, it’ll do until she wakes up and tells you where it’s meant to go.

“All right, Stefan!” You point at the corridor he’d originally run down, while he looks up at you with the sage wisdom of a cunning and patient tracker. “Let’s go! Fetch the Phantom!”

“Bworf!”

Cleverly, he leaps up to chase his tail several times - no doubt a way to check the smell in multiple directions, good boy - and then hurtles happily off down the corridor.

You can feel it!

You’re close!

“Iyaaahhh~” Masayoshi burbles from your back.

>Roll 1d100, best of 3 to avoid trouble on The Hunt!

This roll is for continued background stuff.
>>
Oh shit, we should call Rayleigh to ask him about relationships IN FRONT OF WB AND AKAINU.
Harry: Hello Dadperson, I'm here with Whitedad and a guy called Akainu, he's my father in law now. Well, they want to fight because of me, but I don't want to because I love them both, what should I do?
>Everyone is silent.
>WB is smiling, a single manly tera falls from his eye.
>Akainu looks like a volcano just before erupting, wait, he IS a volcano about to erupt.
>The Den Den stays silent for a moment, then it erupts in the most loud laugh in all the sea, it persists for a few minutes until someone picks the phone from Rayleigh.
Mom: Congratulations darling, I'm so glad you found love.
>Intense laughter is heard in the background.
>>
Rolled 11 (1d100)

>>3532869
>>
Rolled 49 (1d100)

>>3532869
>>
Rolled 1 (1d100)

>>3532869
Stefan Halp
>>
Rolled 41 (1d100)

>>3532869
>>
>>3532873
wwwwelp.
>>
>>3532873
He has forsaken us.

What manner of heresy have we committed?
>>
>>3532873
OH GOD I'M SO SORRY
>>
>>3532869
And we are dead.
>>
>>3532873
HAHAHAHAHAHA
FUCK.
>>
>>3532873
Mmmmmm goooood yeeeeessssssssss

100 for Whitebeards and 1 for trouble... I like this.

I like this a lot.

Gotta go and eat a belated birthday dinner now, back tonight with HORRORS.

Also you might get to punch Blackbeard in the face, so that’s nice!
>>
>>3532877
Waifuing. You committed waifuing.

I WARNED YOU ALL
I WARNED YOU
>>
>>3532882
Oh fuck me, just how many of them did we run into?
>>
>>3532883

Somebody get ScienceAnon, this is invaluable for his research.
>>
Rolled 34 (1d100)

>>3532883
Rolling to see if it was the cursed waifu
>>
Rolled 100 (1d100)

>>3532883
Rolling to see if the dice just wants us to princess carry waifu in the escape
>>
Rolled 85 (1d100)

>>3532886
Rolling to see if Akainu is so angry he killed the concept of luck.
>>
>>3532888
>nat100 AND trips
CONFIRMED
>>
>>3532888
Oh.

Well.

Fuck it, this is shoujo quest now.
>>
>>3532888
FULL SHOUJO

SHOUJO
H
O
U
J
O
>>
>>3532882
>Also you might get to punch Blackbeard in the face, so that’s nice!
Well that's not so bad, then. It's only the rest of the Whitebeard Pirates we'd have to deal with.

>>3532883
>All that time Stefan had to sit there and wait, alone, as his master was lavishing attention on some chick he just met instead of him
;_; bork
>>
>>3532888
CONFIRMED.
DASHING HERO SILVERS HARRY.
>>
>>3532892
Dread Pirate Harry
>>
...this thread is beautiful.
It's like a trainwreck. A sparkling trainwreck.
>>
Rolled 68, 86, 57, 31, 76, 23, 59, 85, 43, 78 = 606 (10d100)

Rolling to check if mediocrity is still a thing or if we cured it via shoujo.
>>
>>3532900
>only three rolls under average
I'd say we're at least getting there.
>>
>>3532900
>Above average
Oh my god

THE SHOUJO BLESSING IS REAL
>>
Rolled 89, 16, 68, 2, 57, 18, 80, 69, 79, 57 = 535 (10d100)

>>3532900
Let's try again but this time with feeling
>>
Rolled 27, 50, 94, 68, 45, 93, 69, 46, 97, 86 = 675 (10d100)

>>3532904
Let's try again but this time with waifus
>>
...Oh fuck. Apparently, we've triggered an earthquake and a volcanic eruption. Are we sure Harry isn't "The Humanoid Typhoon"?
>>
>>3532906
Three 90s, a 69 and a near-69...

>>3532909
Nah, WB finds you hilarious.
>>
>>3532909
More like Calamity-Zone.
Because everywhere he goes powerful people destroy the environment

>>3532906
>>3532911
Waifus confirmed
>>
>>3532911
>Laughter is the best medicine
>We make him Laugh so much we cure him
>We have only made Oyaji stronger

Also also
LaughingRayleigh.jpg
LaughingWhiteBeard.jpg
>>
>>3532913
You may have ONE (1) waifu only.

Do not break her, she won't be replaced.
>>
>This is now a shoujo quest but from the perspective of the type of idiot who would actually behave like a shoujo Male love interest would

Well atleast we're not the modern shoujo Male lead who is pretty much just a fetishized version of an abusive bastard

Instead we're the classic unrealistically cheesy and over the top dumbass fairy tale romance type ,the kind with fluffy shirts ripped open revealing our glistening oiled chest
>>
>>3532917
Akainu right now is probably the angriest he has ever been.
Ever.
If Flashy was a trouble magnet, Silvers is a trouble black hole. (Holy fuck it actually works for their DF powers) (electromagnet = electric = goro goro)
(blackhole = yami yami)
>>
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343 KB JPG
>>3532922
>>
>>3532922
So you're basically what Fop dreams of being.
>>
>>3532892
Silvers Harry, the true antithesis of Flashman. Full Shoujo vs. Full Shounen. This cannot possibly get better. Bring on the sparkly/flower print backgrounds!
>>
>>3532955
Who is that character and what show is she from?
>>
>>3532961
Echizen from Tanaka-kun is always listless. She's a "delinquent" who like cute things.
>>
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>>3532962
Delinquent eyes on cute girls are always a best.
>>
Smoboss getting some weird dreams after reading those romance novels he definitely doesnt have, i see
>>
>>3532992
Fop probably borrowed him one of his novels.
Smoboss dropped it after few pages when he realized paperwork was actually a better way to spend his time than this.
Unfortunately it was too late and his normal PirateFlashman nightmares became infected with shoujo.
>>
>>3533002
Smoboss just wanted to find another way to connect with his daughter. So he borrowed some books from Tashigi and Fop to see what else he could do. So he goes to his office after reading Tashigi's report about Flashman's Pink Flamingo escapades and grabs some "reading liquor". He makes his own flamingo to see what his idiot brat likes about them so much and gets to reading Princess of the Grandline: Two Oceans before passing out on his desk. Never again will he have a Pink Flamingo, thems the devil and explain why Flashman is so....Flashman.
>>
Each chapter of Silvers needs to end with Smoboss waking up and having a thought like "God imagine Flashman withh a Logia, I'm not sure i would survive that" or "Yeah no the brat is not responsible enough to have a pet, good thing he doesnt have the cnahce"
>>
Rolled 60, 76, 93, 51, 23 = 303 (5d100)

>>3533067
Correction, Tashigi doesn't read romance novels. She reads books on sword, which admittedly to her is basically like reading romance novels.

You try to ignore her when she starts blushing and giggling as she turns the pages of 'Jane's Guide to Meitou, 17th edition'. It doesn't help.

Okay, so 100 for Ace and BB (hohoho), 1 for avoiding trouble (hehehe) and you've got a Phantom yet to be found. Also, Mount Akainu has erupted.

Rolling for background stuff, then writing!
>>
OH, before I write...

>Continue with new fiancée slung over shoulder
>Switch to bridal carry
>>
>>3533110
>>Continue with new fiancée slung over shoulder
>>
>>3533110
>>Switch to bridal carry

Easiest decision I've ever made.
>>
>>3533110
>>Switch to bridal carry
>>
>>3533110
>Switch to bridal carry
Dice demanded it.
>>
>>3533096
Admittedly when I put Tashigi I was thinking something like an Isekai novel title. "My Boyfriend is a Supreme Grade Meitou" or something.

>Mount Akainu
I cant wait to see Whitebeard's/Rayleigh's shit eating grins.
>>
>Switch to bridal carry
>>
>>3533110
>Switch to bridal carry
We just found our wife and now we're going to kill her via nosebleed.
>>
>>3533110
>>Switch to bridal carry
>>
>>3533121
If One Piece had dating sims, and there was a sword one like that pigeon game a while back, Tashigi would on that like... like herself on a legendary sword, frankly.
And now I want to have Tashigi secretly writing a bestselling series of terrible, smutty romance novels about women being romanced by sword spirits, so thanks for that.
(She writes them under your name.)

>93 for Phantom

Stefan leads you onwards! To victory! Or Phantom! Which is kind of the same thing, in this instance. Your fiancée is balanced a little awkwardly, so you shift her into your arms instead - oops, you've left a trail of blood splatter behind you, but oh well - half her face is covered too. Double oops?

... well, she still has that dreamy smile, and is currently trying to cling to you like a limpet, so she probably won't die. Probably.

You manage to pet her hair a little, then wonder if that counts as being too forward.

At least Stefan's staying in sight this time, apparently reluctant to lose you, lest you find yourself acquiring a new fiancée. Masayoshi's Den Den rings a few more times as you trundle cheerily down corridors, but it's probably That Asshole, and you have no interest in speaking to him again.

The big jerkface.

"Bworf," Stefan chides you as you fall behind a little, eyeing a small bathroom. Should you maybe wash the blood off Masayoshi's face? Or maybe a splash of cold water would wake her up? As endearing as it is to have her trying to nuzzle your chest, the blood makes it all rather... sticky.

"Sorry, Stefan," you apologize. "Just give me a min-"

The bathroom door swings open, and from it emerges a figure clad in long black robes, face hidden by the peaked hood which casts it in shadow.

"Man, I needed that," they mutter, one gloved hand busy finishing tugging the other glove on.

Then they spot you and freeze.

Their hooded face tilts down in the direction of the blood-coated woman in your arms, then back up to your own, mildly-confused face.

"Bwuff!" Stefan sits down nearby, obviously pleased with himself.

Hood-o leaps into action, finger pointing out at you, robes swaying, while you try to work out the best way to explain the situation. "VILLAIN! UNHAND THAT WOMAN!"

>Um. No?
>But I only just got her...
>Get your own!
>... Are you the Phantom?
>What woman? (DENY. EVERYTHING.)
>Hey! That's my fiancée!
>Stefan, kill!
>Other?
>>
>>3533190
>Hey! That's my fiancée!
>>
>>3533190
>HOW DARE YOU CALL MY FIANCE A WOMAN! EN GARDE!
>>
>Hey! That's my fiancée!
>>
>>3533190
>Hey! That's my fiancée!
>Get your own!
>>
>>3533190
>>... Are you the Phantom?
>>
>>3533190
>>Hey! That's my fiancée!
>>Get your own!
>>
>>3533190
>Um. No?
>Dropping someone is impolite!
>>
>>3533190
>Hey! That's my fiancee!
>Wait a minute, are you the Phantom
>>
>>3533190
>Hey! That's my fiancée!
>...Are you the phantom?
>>
Rolled 87 (1d100)

>>3533201
surprise it's a trap

>how dare u

You become OFFENDED. Why is everyone such an asshole today?! Are they jealous that you managed to snag (to use the technical term) raging hottie? A babe? A chick-a-dee-bow-wow-holey-moley?

"Hey! That's my fiancée!" If you wanna carry her around, covered in blood, then by Seasus, you'll carry her around covered in blood! As long as she's cool with that, naturally.

Hood-o pauses at that, arm still outstretched. "... Oh? Well. I - I apologize!" They motion in embarrassment, voice quietening. "One never knows, in a den of reprehensible evil like this!"

>That's true enough. Damn evil Marines!
>Understandable, I guess, apparently even the Phantom is hiding out here...
>No way! My darling fiancée would never work in a place of evil!
>Other?
>>
>Understandable, I guess, apparently even the Phantom is hiding out here...
>any clue where to find him?
>>
>>3533244
>>Understandable, I guess, apparently even the Phantom is hiding out here...
>>
>>3533244
>>No way! My darling fiancée would never work in a place of evil!
Let the offense continue!
>>
>>3533244
Seconding
>>3533247
>>
>>3533244
>>Understandable, I guess, apparently even the Phantom is hiding out here...
>And I heard the Phantom is double evil
>>
By the way, if you guys want a pet name for your pwecious twu wuv, feel free to vote on it. Otherwise you'll just keep calling her 'my fiancée' rather than 'sweetheart' or 'cupcake' or 'delicious bowl of sugar topped with whipped cream and sprinkles'.
>>
>>3533266
Hot stuff?
>>
>>3533266
Have it change every time. All of them must be lovey dovey enough to make Akainu die inside when we eventually meet
>>
>>3533244
>>Understandable, I guess, apparently even the Phantom is hiding out here...

>>3533266
>By the way, if you guys want a pet name for your pwecious twu wuv, feel free to vote on it.
>twu wuv
Buttercup it is, then.
>>
>>3533266
Her name is Masayoshi...so Yo-chan? Either way, whatever pet-name we give we absolutely *have* to call her it after we Kabedon her.

>>3533190
>My Fiancee was Reincarnated as a Cursed Sword and Stolen by Pirates. By Satan D. Meito
Tashigi is now a light novel writer
>>
>>3533266
My:
>Sea Sapphire
>Calm Belt Cutie
>Darling
>Paperwork Paramour
I'm sure I'll come up with more once she's conscious
>>
>>3533266
What about extra cheesy one liners like:
>you're the judge, jury and executioner of my heart, and I'm guilty of falling for you
>>
>>3533277
I've got to agree with this. To say the same thing over and over would be to diminish it! Every pet utterance must be new and fresh!
>>
>>3533313
>you're the judge, jury and executioner of my heart, and I'm guilty of falling for you
Damn, that a '10/10, would marry on the spot' tier kind of line.
>>
>>3533190
>And now I want to have Tashigi secretly writing a bestselling series of terrible, smutty romance novels about women being romanced by sword spirits, so thanks for that. (She writes them under your name.)

I want this to be canon please and thank you.
>>
>true dat

You frown, resettling your grip on Masayoshi as she lovingly smears nose-blood over your shirt "Understandable, I guess, apparently even the Phantom is hiding out here..."

Hood-o sways back slightly. "Ph- Phantom? That legendary, talented assassin?"

"I dunno about legendary, their bounty is kind of small," you muse.

"No it isn't!" Hood-o's fist clenches. "Besides, Phantom's just starting out! It'll get bigger. And it's not the size if the bounty that counts, it's how it was earned!"

"... By killing civilians?"

"No! By bringing justice, true justice to the masses! By destroying the corrupt and the oppressors! The official, untouchable scum! By singing the rallying cry of revolution!"

You shrug. "Pretty sure the dude's just here to, like, kill a banker and shit, man."

The form of Hood-o slumps slightly, voice lessening to a weak murmur. "That's... that's not the point at all..."

You open your mouth to reply, interrupted by a loud click, which draws your attention to a loudspeaker placed on the ceiling. An announcement?

"ALL MARINES! ALL MARINES! WHITEBEARD PIRATES HAVE BEEN SIGHTED IN TOWN! REPORT IMMEDIATELY TO YOUR SUPERIORS!"

....

Well, nuts.

"Whitebeard pirates...?" Hood-o's voice is a cold whisper as they straighten, head still bowed, hand reaching into their robes. "So... they've come for my Devil Fruit at last..."

Their robes sway (strange, you don't feel any wind) as their head finally rises to face you. It would probably be more impressive if you could see anything other than a shadow. "Perhaps we'll meet again... weird blood-fetish man!"

"Hehe... fetish..." your beloved purrs, smearing more blood over you.

"I don't ha-" you begin, but it's too late; withdrawing their hand again, Hood-o slams a small item quickly to the floor, which erupts into a rapid spray and cloud of dense smoke, sending you stumbling back out of range, blinking and coughing.

"Don't-go-in-the-bathroom-for-a-while," Hood-o calls, footsteps beating a hasty retreat down the corridor somewhere, hidden by the still thick smoke hanging in the air.

You fall back to the wall behind you, unable to see much beyond a few inches. After a bit of sputtering, it seems like the smoke is at least breathable, and your... darling (eeeeeee, you can use petnames for her! So cool!) doesn't sound like she's having problems.

Beyond the obvious of being unconscious, covered in blood and apparently having to deal with some asshole over Den Den.

By the feel off a small snout poking at your leg, Stefan's fine too.

"Well. That was weird." You sigh.

>Stumble on! Find the Phantom!
>The base is gonna be in an uproar with the Whitebeards; call the hunt off for now and go hide on the boat.
>Try to wake up your sugar-bunny to get her opinion. Teamwork!
>Other?

>>3533322
>'by Flashman Harry'
>zoro loves them because SWORDS
>sanji loves them because romance/smut
>strawhats end up starting a book-club promoting 'your' books
>everyone refuses to believe you're not the author
>>
>Try to wake up your sugar-bunny to get her opinion. Teamwork!
>also take her to a nurse, that is too much blood
>>
>>3533359
>>Try to wake up your sugar-bunny to get her opinion. Teamwork!
>>
>>3533359
>>Try to wake up your sugar-bunny to get her opinion. Teamwork!
>>
>>3533365
Supporting
>Inb4 we're mistaken for a hero that gloriously saved her from the phantom
>>
>>3533359
>>Try to wake up your sugar-bunny to get her opinion. Teamwork!
With these super sweet pet names, I hope Big Mom doesn't get the wrong idea
>>
>>3533359
>>3533365
This is good. Then we need to flee so those darn Whitebeards dont steal our Princess.
>>
>>3533359
>>Try to wake up your sugar-bunny to get her opinion. Teamwork!
>>
Rolled 33 (1d100)

>wake up sleeping bleedy

You squint down at your snuggly venus flytrap, trying to see her as the smoke finally stops spewing. It'll probably start to thin out soon, but you can already heat the distant yells and running of Marines, probably heading to intercept the Whitebeards.

Damn it. She really needs to wake up. Before the two of you look like you've stabbed multiple times.

>Pinch her nose and cover her mouth. She'll automatically wake up if she can't breathe, right?
>The stories always have the girls wake with a kiss right... although that's not really how you wanted your first kiss to be. Assuming this IS your first kiss? Damn amnesia!
>Yell in her ear. But romantically!
>Other?
>>
>>3533409
>Caress her cheek and whisper sweet nothings into her ear.
>>
>>3533409
>>Pinch her nose and cover her mouth. She'll automatically wake up if she can't breathe, right?
>>
>>3533409
>>The stories always have the girls wake with a kiss right... although that's not really how you wanted your first kiss to be. Assuming this IS your first kiss? Damn amnesia!

SHOUJO
H
O
U
J
O
>>
>>3533409
>>The stories always have the girls wake with a kiss right... although that's not really how you wanted your first kiss to be. Assuming this IS your first kiss? Damn amnesia!
This is sure to wake her up!
She'll faint again immediately after, but she'll wake up.
>>
>Caress her cheek and whisper sweet nothings into her ear.
>The world is better when you act darling, so come on and wake up~
>>
>>3533409
>>The stories always have the girls wake with a kiss right... although that's not really how you wanted your first kiss to be. Assuming this IS your first kiss? Damn amnesia!
100% shoujo
>>
>>3533409
>Caress her cheek and whisper sweet nothings into her ear.
>The stories always have the girls wake with a kiss right... although that's not really how you wanted your first kiss to be. Assuming this IS your first kiss? Damn amnesia!
>Try not to blush too hard.
MAXIMUM SHOUJO!
>>
>>3533435
>>3533436
>Combo
Too good, I'll switch to supporting this
>>
>>3533436
Supporting
>>
Rolled 31 (1d100)

>how to get a restraining order against you

It's a little hard to caress someone's cheek when you're using both arms to hold them, but you manage to awkwardly shift and stretch one arm to do so.

"Darling," you whisper, leaning down to her. "Honey-cakes. Butterfly-pumpkin mocha-snookums. Dandeli-"

>Roll 1d100, best of 3 to dodge the flailing punch of a panicked, half-conscious woman while you're both blinded by smoke!
>>
One thing I like is tat thanks to who her dad is there is a very good chance we are the onyl guy to ever even flirt with her, everyone else was too scared!
>>
Rolled 60 (1d100)

>>3533466
>>
Rolled 63 (1d100)

>>3533466
>>
>>3533418
>>3533424
>>3533436
Sweet nothings. I think you mean weet things (unless you want to wisper bshbshbbs as sweetly as you can and wait for something to happen).
>>
Rolled 86 (1d100)

>>3533466
This isn't like my Chinese cartoons at all
>>
Rolled 66 (1d100)

>>
>>3533478
*sweet
Fuck you too phone
>>
How is Silvers Harry so smooth!? He can't keep getting away with it!
>>
>>3533478
What's more romantic than whispering incoherent babbles into your little ducklings ear? I know what I meant.
>>
>>3533478
'Sweet nothings' is a name for meaningless romantic cooing.

Looks like you managed to dodge, sadly. Writing!
>>
>>3533489
He is the antiFlashman, the same guy that screamed to a girl in Loguetown's pier because she was scared of him.
>>
>>3533493
Never is too late to learn something new.
>>
Rolled 47, 4, 59 = 110 (3d100)

>86, boooooo

Your Haki isn't active, but airflow and an instinct for danger tells you to suddenly jerk your head back, as a flailing fist swings through where your face was.

"W- what's - where am I?!"

Your cuddly baby tapir' voice sounds panicked, as she struggles slightly in your grip - the smoke is still thick enough you can only vaguely the shape of her body, even at this range.

"Wuff!" Stefan is so helpful!

>It's okay! There's nowhere safer than in my arms~ (Angst over the fact you can't wink or fingergun due to smoke and having your hands full)
>Everything's okay! The island's under attack by Whitebeard pirates who want to kidnap me, but it's all cool.
>In my heart. And my arms. And your base. But mostly my heart and arms.
>Other?
>>
>>3533489
He doesn't remember his real personality. Thanks Amnesia!
>>
Rolled 25, 29 = 54 (2d100)

>>3533518
..... background rolls.
>>
>>3533518
>Everything's okay! The island's under attack by Whitebeard pirates who want to kidnap me, but it's all cool.
>>
>>3533518
>In my heart. And my arms. And your base. But mostly my heart and arms.
>>
>>3533518
>Everything's okay! The island's under attack by Whitebeard pirates who want to kidnap me, but it's all cool.
Gotta play up that mysterious past angle
>>
>>3533523
Ace and Blackbeard are both jobbing.

Incredible.
>>
>>3533528
>>3533518
>In my heart. And my arms. And your base. But mostly my heart and arms.

Hell yeah, supporting this.
>>
>>3533518
>In my heart. And my arms. And your base. But mostly my heart and arms.
>Everything's okay! The island's under attack by Whitebeard pirates who want to kidnap me, but it's all cool.
>>
>>3533532
Lmao.
You expected more from the Ds in parallel world?
>>
>>3533532
In the Infinit flux of timelines and dimensions, the only constant is Ace being a jobber.
>>
>>3533518
>>In my heart. And my arms. And your base. But mostly my heart and arms.
Oh but also
>The island's under attack by Whitebeard pirates who want to kidnap me, but it's all cool.

>>3533532
Typical of Ace but it's a good sign for us that BB is even worse than us
>>
>>3533518
>>In my heart. And my arms. And your base. But mostly my heart and arms.
>>
>>3533518
>In my heart. And my arms. And your base. But mostly my heart and arms.
>We need to run dearest, Whitebeards are attacking. I'm afraid they're after me. Not sure why though, right Stefan?
>>
>>3533535
Supporting
>>
Rolled 67 (1d100)

Rolling for the possibility of Ace not being a jobber?
>>
>>3533518
>Everything's okay! The island's under attack by Whitebeard pirates who want to kidnap me, but it's all cool.
Totally drama free life here.
>>
I can't stop thinking of Akainu treating his daughter as his little princess, being a superprotective father that calls her every day to see how she's doing.
One day he calls her and some random guy answers the Den Den and tells you she's his fiancee and they are sleeping.
The rage he will unlesh upon us will be both fun and terrifiying.
>>
>you're in hell, masaaaaa

"In my heart," you say, being the suave and sexy guy that you are. "And my arms. And your base. But mostly my heart and arms." You pause, given the continued calls and stomping feet down distant corridors. "Oh, and the island's under attack by Whitebeard pirates who want to kidnap me, but it's all cool."

You feel her freeze in your arms. "Whitebeard pirates?! But why!"

"I just said - they want to kidnap me."

"Yes, but WHY?!"

>I have absolutely no idea at all it's a mystery how strange oh well I guess we'll never know. Yep yep yep.
>I stole Whitebeard's dog and ate one of their Devil Fruits.
>They want to recruit me.
>Eh, enough about me, let's talk about you. What's your favorite color? I need to know what to theme our wedding.
>Other?
>>
>>3533582
>>I have absolutely no idea at all it's a mystery how strange oh well I guess we'll never know. Yep yep yep.
>>
>>3533582
>"I stole their best crew member and ate their food. Yepyepyep, so how do you like your drinks? Alcoholic? Flat? P I N K ?"
>>
>>3533582
>Eh, enough about me, let's talk about you. What's your favorite color? I need to know what to theme our wedding.
>>
>I stole Whitebeard's dog and ate one of their Devil Fruits.
>So now they wanna recruit me
>>
>>3533582
>>I stole Whitebeard's dog and ate one of their Devil Fruits.
>>They want to recruit me.
Sometimes pirates don't make sense.
>>
>>3533582
>>I stole Whitebeard's dog and ate one of their Devil Fruits.
>>
>>3533582
>>I stole Whitebeard's dog and ate one of their Devil Fruits.
>But enough about me, let's talk about you. What's your favorite color? I need to know what to theme our wedding.
Man. We are so romantic.
>>
>>3533582
>I stole Whitebeard's dog and ate one of their Devil Fruits.
>Also, someone called you and I answered. He was kinda rude.
>>
>>3533582
>I, ahem, "liberated" their dog Stefan who is now my partner. I also "liberated" some fruit from them.
>But that's besides the point. The sooner we leave, the sooner we can get away and start planning our wedding.
>>
>>3533582
>I stole Whitebeard's dog and ate one of their Devil Fruits.
>They want to recruit me.
>Eh, enough about me, let's talk about you. What's your favorite color? I need to know what to theme our wedding.
>>
>>3533582
>I stole Whitebeard's dog and ate one of their Devil Fruits.
>They want to recruit me

We need to hide in our boat soon.
>>
>>3533606
Support
>>
>>3533598
+1
>>
Rolled 97, 78, 97 = 272 (3d100)

>pirates. how do they work.

You shrug, unseen in the smoke. "I stole Whitebeard's dog and ate one if their Devil Fruits. So now they want to recruit me."

There's a few moments of silence, before you feel your charming angel nod. "Hm... that makes sense."

It does? "Of course it does! So, uh, I was wondering if there was anything you wanted to do? With me? Right now?" Like marriage.

"Oh! Well - I mean... should you stop carrying me? A-as I'm awake now...?"

"Bwowf," Stefan agrees, pointedly bumping into your leg.

"Right, I guess..." you mumble, carefully tilting her so she can stumble to her feet. The smoke is starting to thin a little, but you still can't make out details. "And now?"

You can sort of see her fist-pumping. "I'm going to do my duty and help fight those pirates! You stay here, where it's safe!"

>(SHIT, KNOCK HER BACK OUT)
>W-WAIT! Think of the dog! Won't somebody think of the dog?!
>Yeeeeessss, I will... absolutely do that.
>Other?
>>
>>3533650
>>W-WAIT! Think of the dog! Won't somebody think of the dog?!
>>
>>3533650
>>W-WAIT! Think of the dog! Won't somebody think of the dog?!
>>
>Whitebeard himself sent his commanders after me, it's too dangerous for me to stay, they could hurt you!
>I will run and hide and find you again, just give me your snail number and remember Silvers Harry will forever love you!
>Also some angry guy called while you were asleep
>>
>>3533650
>97 and 97
Ultimate Duel going on here .
Full power Ace vs Akainu?
Also
>W-WAIT! Think of the dog! Won't somebody think of the dog?!
>>
>>3533650
>It's too dangerous. They are after me. I should flee and they will follow me. Less bloodshed that way.
>Also I need you as a bodyguard now.

Let's flee together like in those romantic novels.
>>
>>3533662
Supportin my dude.
>>
>>3533650
>Whoa whoa whoa, I like the fire there but I've got a better idea. If they're after me, then why not make a biiiiiiiig show and flee the island? Then they'll stop attacking the base and start attacking me! When we lose them at sea we can get back to wedding planning.
>>
>>3533650
>W-WAIT! Think of the dog! Won't somebody think of the dog?!
>>
>>3533662
>>3533672
Yes. This. Do it. Do it now.
>>
>>3533661
Thankfully Akainu is at Marineford, or you'd be dead right now. Instead it's a 3-way battle between the Marine, annoyed WB pirates and very frustrated Redhaired pirates who just wanted to buy supplies, dammit.

Heading to bed, thanks for playing, and it looks like think of Stefan and let's elope are tied for now.
>>
>>3533672
Support. Maximum volcano rage.
>>
>>3533650 #
>W-WAIT! Think of the dog! Won't somebody think of the dog?!
>>
>>3533672
I'll switch to eloping
Akainu's gonna flip.
>>
>>3533717
Switch my vote to let's elope.
>>
>>3533672
Now we do the kidnapping, what a strange timeline.
>>
I like Phantom. We should kidnap him too.
>>
>>3533650
>Whoa whoa whoa, I like the fire there but I've got a better idea. If they're after me, then why not make a biiiiiiiig show and flee the island? Then they'll stop attacking the base and start attacking me! When we lose them at sea we can get back to wedding planning.
>>
>>3533797
Lol, if we get strong enough, we could kidnap even DF users with our power (kidnap Akainu to get his blessing)
>>
>>3533797
We create the Silvers Pirates entirely by kidnapping people we like Into our crew. And then we make them like It!

Even If we kidnap them by just asking them to join like a normal person and they accept.

It counts! Phantom as our idiot first mate!
>>
Rolled 77 (1d100)

Stuff.
>>
>>3535256
She awakens
>>
>can’t wait to kill off your waifu

“Whoa whoa whoa, I like the fire there,” you say, holding your hands up (and waving some of the smoke aside), “but I've got a better idea. If they're after me, then why not make a biiiiiiiig show and flee the island? Then they'll stop attacking the base and start attacking me! When we lose them at sea we can get back to wedding planning.”

A pause.

“W-w-w-WEDDING?!” You can sort of see your adorable tortilla sway slightly, hands reaching up to press against her cheeks. “But - it’s so sudden!”

It is? Oh yeah, you’re meant to have, uh, three dates before you get married or something? That seems about right. “I know it’s fast,” you tell her, earnest, “but I do everything fast.”

“Well, you can get pills for that...” your scrumptious cacti murmurs, before you see her cross her arms. No doubt she has a cute, stubborn look on her face. And blood. Lots of blood. “Regardless! The priority right now is stop the Whitebeard attack, and... your idea has merit.”

Naturally! You’re a tactical genius!

“We’ll get in contact with my C.O. and find out what kind of big display is best.”

>No, no, it’s cool. I’ll just go run past them all all, and they’ll give chase. No biggie.
>Sounds good! Give them a call and we’ll get started.
>Actually, how about we go to the docks and blow up the Whitebeard ship?
>Other
>>
>>3535274
>Actually, how about we go to the docks and blow up the Whitebeard ship?
>Wait, no. What if they stow away on another ship. Better blow up EVERY ship just to be safe.
>>
>Sounds good! Give them a call and we’ll get started.
>by the way, some guy called earlier but you were asleep, they sounded angry
>>
>>3535274
“Well, you can get pills for that...”

Ouch. Low blow mang

>>3535274
>STEAL the WB ship instead

This is a perfect idea and no way will anything go wrong
>>
>>3535286
Supporting
>>
>>3535274
>>3535305
We've already stolen a dog. Why not a ship that's full of goodies? And may or may not have BB's and Ace's stuff
>>
>>3535274
>>3535305

Fuck it. Support

Steal yo fruit
Steal yo dawg
Steal yo ship
>>
>>3535305
Support.
>>
>>3535305
Fuck yeah. Switching to this!
>>
>mfw the British Museum is selling an £85 Charlotte Katakuri figure as part of their manga exhibition
No. No. I musn’t.
No.
>>
>>3535305
+1
>>
>>3535274
Also romantic ballroom dancing on the ship anyone?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LFvSElnmnVs


If you can get past the fucking necks, I very highly recommend this anime

Ballroom e Youkoso
>>
>>3535333
... And a ‘Winsmoke Sanju’ nanoblock. Really?
>>
>>3535333
Nice

>>3535339
It's the wanted poster all over again hahahahaha
>>
>won’t someone think of how rockstar has to explain this shit to shanks and silvers

“I’ve got an idea! We’ll steal the Whitebeard ship that they came on!” GENIUS. Stefan approves too, by the way he rolls around on the floor, panting.

“Then... how will they chase us?”

“Uh. Well, they’re pirates, so they’ll likely steal a ship... but they won’t be as good at handling an unfamiliar one,” (you conveniently leave aside the fact that you guys probably won’t be able to handle the Whitebeard ship well). “We just need to make it nice and flashy!”

“Sounds good!” Your bloodstained paramour seems reasonably enthusiastic. “With the Vice-Admiral at sea nearby, those criminals have no chance!”

>Perfect! You go to the docks and find their ship, I’ll go get their attention!
>Perfect! Let’s go get their attention, then we’ll lead them to the docks!
>Vice-Admiral who?
>Other?

In other news, I’ll be in London on 29th and 30th May, so probably few updates then.
>>
>>3535365
>>Perfect! You go to the docks and find their ship, I’ll go get their attention!
>>
>>3535365
>In other news, I’ll be in London on 29th and 30th May, so probably few updates then.
Ewww. Another tourist in my city.
Just a heads up, if you're going to visit the Tate then the only good exhibition currently is the one about ya boi Pierre Bonnard.

And make sure you avoid the alleyways by 7 unless you want to be cold and surrounded by drunk (possibly homeless) locals.

>Perfect! Let's head to the docks, if they chase us, they chase us.
>>
>>3535365
>>Perfect! You go to the docks and find their ship, I’ll go get their attention!
>>Vice-Admiral who?

So this is basically how I imagine this going.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JQoNhpxxFh0
>>
>>3535365
>Perfect! You go to the docks and find their ship, I’ll go get their attention!
>Vice-Admiral who?
PLS DON'T BE GARP

Also I think she'll be better at readying a ship since she's a marine and we're an amnesiatic dumbass
>>
>>3535365
>>Perfect! Let’s go get their attention, then we’ll lead them to the docks!
>>
>>3535374
Your city is garbage and you should feel bad
t. East Anglian
>>
Rolled 39, 97, 13 = 149 (3d100)

>>3535374
I live thirtyish minutes away from London so I’m quite a regular, just thought I’d give a heads up for incoming sparse updates (or more sparse than usual at the minute). And I’ll proooobably be doing my standard spin around the British Museum, V&A and National Gallery, although the Fan Museum has changed their exhibition from last time... might hit up Kew Gardens as well, depending on time. Already booked my ticket for the British Museum manga exhibit, so rest assured I’ll post pictures of any terrible spellings on the One Piece part of the exhibit. HOHOHO I LIKE MOCKING THINGS.
... Winsmoke Sanju. Seriously. Wow.

Background rooooooolls~ and writing for grabbing their attention!
>>
>>3535413
>Another 97
>Ace jobbing again
What even IS going on there hahaha
>>
>dem rolls

“Perfect! You go to the docks and find their ship, I’ll go get their attention!”

“Understood! Good luck... H-Harry...” Oh, she’s swaying again. That’s a thing.

“All right, I’m gonna get going. See ya! Stefan, come on, boy!” You flash her a grin she can’t see, and take off at a run back down the corridor you originally came from, out of the smoke and into the clean air of a rapidly-emptying Marine base, Stefan running at your heels.

“Let’s go attract some Whitebeard attention,” you tell him, determined. His tongue lolls out as he borks, which is obviously agreement. “We don’t know how many there are, or their capabilities, so we’ll

>attack them and then run to the docks!
>attack them and beat up one or two! Or three! Or ten! THEN we’ll run to the docks!
>stand on a rooftop near them and yell until they pay attention!
>Other?

>>3535413
That was actually Redhaireds, WBs, Marines, so Ace wasn’t jobbing for once, incredible. BB picking up the slack there.
>>
>>3535444
>attack them and beat up one or two! Or three! Or ten! THEN we’ll run to the docks!
>>
>>3535444
>>stand on a rooftop near them and yell until they pay attention!

activate taunt.exe
>>
>>3535396
>t. East Anglian
Run off back to the 'olk an 'shire you stupe.

>>3535413
I forgot that then was showing of manga.. what a time to be alive.

There's a museum I've visited where a ton is out on display, so much so that it can be difficult to move around it. They have an opened sarcophagus with the body still inside. I can't remember the name of it and it's killing me.
>>
>>3535444
>>stand on a rooftop near them and yell until they pay attention!
This is Nega-Harry, so that means he's actually capable of standing on roofs.
>>
>>3535444
>stand on a rooftop near them and yell until they pay attention!
>>
>>3535444
>stand on a rooftop near them and yell until they pay attention!
Remember mediocrity is our middle name
>>
>>3535444
>>stand on a rooftop near them and yell until they pay attention!
>HEY LISTEN!
>>
>>3535454
The British Museum’s Egyptology rooms are pretty damn good, are you sure it wasn’t there?

>the roof, the roof, the roof is on fire

“- stand on a rooftop near them and yell until they pay attention!”

Stefan gazes up at you with adoring expression of someone who realizes your tactical acumen And is in AWE. You’ve gotta get him some good treats. But... apparently not on this island.

Oh well!

The base is currently operating on a skeleton crew, so it’s no problem to breeze past the couple of guards again, even as they yell at you to stop.

If there’s one thing going for you apart from your brain, good looks, skills, fashion sense, cute dog and new fiancée, it’s definitely your speed.

>Roll 1d100, best of 3 to find the WB pirates
>>
Rolled 81 (1d100)

>>3535480
>>
Rolled 7 (1d100)

>>3535480
>>
Rolled 6 (1d20)

>>3535480
Probably not, there was a strange collection. It wasn't all Egyptian. Like there was an incan staff, some old Nike shoe, tons and tons of weapons on the 2nd floor, and quite a lot of jewelry and pottery.
The mummy had an unbandaged toe I believe..
>>
Rolled 84 (1d100)

>>3535480
>>
>>3535503
>>3535502
How was yours posted before mine but it comes afterwards in the posts order?
>>
>>3535504

>>3535502
>11:19:44
>>3535503
>11:19:43
Wow, what the fuck.
So does this mean we've gotten and 84, or just an 81?
>>
>>3535504
...uh, that's weird as shit
>>
Rolled 7 (1d100)

>>3535502
Might have been in a private/stately home turned museum, then?

>>3535505
Uh, it means you time-travelled. Good job breaking reality!

I mean, it’s a pass anyway, but still.
Rollin’ 4 tiem-travil
>>
>>3535514
>Uh, it means you time-travelled. Good job breaking reality!
God dammit not again.

>Might have been in a private/stately home turned museum, then?
I think it might have been! I think it was connected to a college or university somehow.. Probably literally.
>>
>81/84 HMMMMMMMMMM

It’s pretty damn easy to find out where the Whitebeards are, because you follow the sound of gunshots. And explosions.

Mmm, discreet.

You grab Stefan, because cuteness doesn’t help small dogs climb buildings, and get to within a decent range of the ensuing fight. From the yells and noises, it sounds like it’s a bunch of Marines versus a small number of Whitebeards, but...

Is that the Firefist guy’s voice?

“-even want to fight, mind your own business!”

... yeah, that’s him. Judging from the increased gunfire, it sounds like the local Marines aren’t particularly interested in leaving the pirates to do what they want.

You turn your eyes up to the nearby buildings that are between you and the ongoing ‘dispute’, Stefan snuffling happily in your arms.

>Roll 1d100 for climbing

DEFEAT GRAVITY
>>
>>3535514
Silvers Harry transcends time and space.

Wait, does this mean that he's timeless?
>>
Rolled 35 (1d100)

>>3535528
>>
Rolled 90 (1d100)

>>3535528
GRAVITY DEFEATED
>>
Rolled 62 (1d100)

>>3535528
>>
Rolled 73 (1d100)

>>3535528
>>3535534
Nice.
>>
>>3535536
I thought it was Silvers once again breaking the mediocrity but thinking on it, it's just him being Anti-Flashman and actually being able to do rooftop related actions very well.
>>
>>3535534
Truly, the anti-Flashman
>>
>>3535534
OnePieceBaka is my nemesis.

>90+10 climbing booooooooooo

You get yourself to the top of the building (a bakery) with almost surprising easy. Of course, you’re amazing, but still. You didn’t expect it to be THAT easy with a dog tucked under one arm.

Damn, you’re good.

You crouch low as you peer over the rooftop, to get a better view of -

Oh. Hey.

The Whitebeards are up one end of the street, Marines at the other - but with the Whitebeards (two of them, Firefist and some really fat, ugly dude) are... your two Redhaired escorts,

Literally noooooo-one looks happy about the situation.

There’s a lull in shooting, a ship the Marines fall back slightly to reload, but it doesn’t really seem like the pirates want to take advantage of it, being too busy bickering quietly over something. Eh, whatever. You just need to get their attention...

>”IMPORTANT NEWS, WHITEBEARD SUCKS.”
>”HEY EVERYONE, CHECK OUT THIS DOG!”
>”MY NAME IS SILVERS HARRY, AND I’M GOING TO MAKE THIS DOG THE PIRATE KING!”
>Other.
>>
>>3535550
>>”MY NAME IS SILVERS HARRY, AND I’M GOING TO MAKE THIS DOG THE PIRATE KING!”
>>
>>3535550
>”HEY EVERYONE, CHECK OUT THIS DOG!”
>>
>>3535550
>>”MY NAME IS SILVERS HARRY, AND I’M GOING TO MAKE THIS DOG THE PIRATE KING!”

>>HE SMELLS BETTER THAN WHITEBEARD AND IS MORE COMPETENT THAN THE WORLD GOVERNMENT.
>>
>>3535550
>>”MY NAME IS SILVERS HARRY, AND I’M GOING TO MAKE THIS DOG THE PIRATE KING!”
It's like Gol D. Roger himself came back
>>
>>3535560
Supporting
>>
>>3535550
>”MY NAME IS SILVERS HARRY, AND I’M GOING TO MAKE THIS DOG THE PIRATE KING!”
>Leak some darkness to make an awesome backdrop for yourself.
>>
>>3535550
>"ACE, YOU SUCK AT HIDE AND SEEK!"

I want to add this. He failed hard trying to find us in his ship.
>>
>>3535566
Aside from being right up Flashman's alley, it could even give Blackbeard an aneurysm. Win-Win!
>>
>>3535550
>MY NAME IS SILVERS HARRY, AND I’M GOING TO MAKE THIS DOG THE PIRATE KING!
>>
>MY NAME IS SILVERS HARRY AND I JUST GOT ENGAGED TO SAKAZUKI MASAYOSHI! YOU ARE NOT INVITED TO THE WEDDING!
>>
>>3535580
+1
>>
>>3535580
Brilliant, let's do it.
>>
>

You clear your throat, stand up, and hold your charming anon handsome friend up for the world to see. His tail wags even faster at this exciting new event.

”MY NAME IS SILVERS HARRY, AND I’M GOING TO MAKE THIS DOG THE PIRATE KING!”

A silence falls, as pirates and Marines stop and slowly stare up at the crazy man with too many weapons, holding up a small, fluffy white doggy. With a moustache. Stefan, not you. You don’t have a moustache.

Then Firefist’s arm snaps up as he points at you, fury covering his face. “You! Get down from there and come home, right now!”

Rockstar very gently places his forehead in his palms.

>”I already have a family, hot-head, and you’re not part of it!”
>”This rooftop is my home now! Mine and Stefan’s!”
>Don’t wanna! (stick your tongue out at him)
>Other?

Heading back to the house, update sort of soonish probably but not~
>>
>No! I am going to run away with my fiance and you will never catch me!
>>
>>3535594
>>”I already have a family, hot-head, and you’re not part of it!”

>>I can't remember who or where, but I know it ain't you!
>>
>>3535594
>>”I already have a family, hot-head, and you’re not part of it!”
>>
>>3535594
>"I already have a family, hot-head, and you’re not invited to the wedding!"
>"I am going to run away with my fiance and you will never catch me!"
>>
>>3535594
>Don’t wanna! (stick your tongue out at him)

The way he says it makes me think of an older brother talking to a younger one. Makes me want to be a brat and cause him trouble.
>>
>>3535594
>"I already have a family, hot-head, and you’re not invited to the wedding!"
>"I am going to run away with my fiance and you will never catch me!"
>>
>>3535608
Supporting
>>
changing to this
>"I already have a family, hot-head, and you’re not invited to the wedding!"
>"I am going to run away with my fiance and you will never catch me!"
>>
>>3535594
>"I already have a family, hot-head, and you’re not invited to the wedding!"
>"I am going to run away with my fiance and you will never catch me!"
I honestly kind of wish this was the main quest now, this is amazing.
>>
>>3535637
This is the quest I pour zero effort into, and you get the shit I just fling at a screen because I know it would never fly in the main quest.

Also Smoker's head is a weird place, as you'll discover when you run into the Vice Admiral.
>>
>>3535647
Mediocre qm effort, mediocre rolls- HEY WAIT A MINUTE!

These rolls are your fault Qm. Own up!
>>
>>3535647
inb4 it's the smoker from our universe wondering what the hell we're doing now.
>>
>>3535653
I'm pretty sure that's the idea, this entire Silvers harry AU thing is just Smoboss's nightmares.
>>
Rolled 18 (1d100)

>>3535651
N-no! What I mean is... I work so hard on this quest! So hard! So much research! And, um... goodbye.

Roll to escape JUDGEMENT
>>
>>3535659
You can't escape the truth
>>
>>3535659
>Roll to escape JUDGEMENT
Never heard of him. Is he nice?

>So much research!
Sure Qm, sure. I can play the long game.

Bad internet gang rise up! Who else here gets below 100 Kilobytes?
>>
>>3535659
Looks like you'll be sharing a cell in Impel Down with OnePieceBaka
>>
Rolled 69 (1d100)

>>3535677
..... excellent.

Rolling to shank OnePieceBaka and free myself of his cursed rolls 4EVA
>>
Rolled 8 (1d100)

>>3535679
STOP
>>
>>3535679
>Rolled 69
Nice. I ship it.
>>
>>3535679
>69

I have some bad news for you BPQM....
>>
>>3535681
I can't believe I'm fucking ____.
>>
File: Perfection.gif (913 KB, 500x271)
913 KB
913 KB GIF
>>3535679
>69
>>
Rolled 95 (1d100)

Rolling for BPQM to accept OnePieceBaka into her spider heart.
>>
>>3535702
>Rolled 95
Nice!
What shall we call this ship for her maiden voyage (euphemism intended).
>>
>>3535707
The Baka and the B(PQM)east?
>>
File: nowayfag.jpg (35 KB, 493x379)
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>>3535702
>>
>>3535679
>>3535681
>>3535702
............... but I wanna hot girl... >:(

>>3535725
Excellent, our first and last not-date shall be a gay bar. We will drink Pink Flamingoes and ignore each other.

... Except for me stabbing you, nemesis.
>>
>>3535752
Are you going against the dice gods?
>>
Rolled 93, 47 = 140 (2d100)

>>3535822
Yes.

>taking a break from housework, holy crap it piled up....

He's not your real brother! And Whitebeard's not your real dad! They can't tell you what to do!

... So there.

"I already have a family, hot-head, and you’re not invited to the wedding!" You tug Stefan back close to you, letting him snuggle up. "I'm going to run away with my fiancée and you'll never catch me!"

"Woo! You go, stud!" Aah, Kato. At least she supports you, even if Spiky's stopped groaning into his hands and is now staring at you in confused horror.

The Marines just flick their gazes between you and the pirates like watching a tennis match.

Ace splutters in increased F U R Y now, the fat dude glaring up at you with... wow, you're pretty sure that's sheer loathing. "What?! You can't get married! Has Pops even met her?!"

So old-fashioned! What, do they want a sit-doen meeting between Whitebeard and Masoyashi's father so they at range a dowry or something?! Ridiculous! Especially when Whitebeard's not even your father!

>My father is Silvers Rayleigh, dumbass!
>Captain Stefan's given his blessing, and that's all we need!
>We're madly in love, and she's currently stealing your ship!
>Other?

Rolling for background stuff.
>>
>>3535927
>My father is Silvers Rayleigh, dumbass!
>>
>>3535927
>>Captain Stefan's given his blessing, and that's all we need!
>>Also you suck at hide and seek
>>
>My father is Silvers Rayleigh, dumbass!
>And I swear that Sakazuki Masayoshi will be my wife!
>>
>>3535927
>>Captain Stefan's given his blessing, and that's all we need!
>>
>>3535927
>We are in very progressive relationship!
>>
>>3535927
>YOU SUCK AT HIDE AND SEEK
>I SHALL MARRY MAYAYOSHI AND STEFAN SHALL BE THE BEST MAN
>>
>>3535927
Just throwing it out there that ship captains can perform marriages, so Stefan could be a stand-in for a priest.
>>
>>3535927
>My father is Silvers Rayleigh, dumbass!
Hahahahahahhaahhahahahahahaha.
God damn.
>>
>>3535927
>Captain Stefan's given his blessing, and that's all we need!
>Also you suck at hide and seek
>>
>>3535927
>My father is Silvers Rayleigh, dumbass!
aka "YOU'RE NOT MY REAL DAD" except we actually mean it
>>
>>3535927
>My father is Silvers Rayleigh, dumbass!
>We're madly in love, and she's currently stealing your ship!
>>
>>3535927
>>My father is Silvers Rayleigh, dumbass!
>>Captain Stefan's given his blessing, and that's all we need!
>>
>>3535927
>My father is Silvers Rayleigh, dumbass!

Pretty sure they don't know yet who our father is. Time to name drop him.
>>
The only way for Whitebeard to be our dad would be if he and Rayleigh are a thing. Then we might accept him.

Maybe we should tell him that. Seems like the easiest solution to everyone's problems.
>>
>>3535927
>My father is Silvers Rayleigh, dumbass!
>>
Who will be our best man?
>>
>>3535987
What if they actually agree just to tease you.
Rayleigh: Harry eat the vegatables.
H: NO.
WB: Harry, don't make me spank you, eat the vegetables.
R: Thanks darling~.
H: THIS IS ABSURD.
WB: Hey, don't talk like that to your father.
R: Oh, I wouldn't know what to do without you.
H:AHHHHHHH.
(Remember this is all happening inside Smoker's mind).
>>
>here's the previous update, but with typos corrected because wow that was shit

He's not your real brother! And Whitebeard's not your real dad! They can't tell you what to do!

... So there.

"I already have a family, hot-head, and you’re not invited to the wedding!" You tug Stefan back close to you, letting him snuggle up. "I'm going to run away with my fiancée and you'll never catch me!"

"Woo! You go, stud!" Aah, Kato. At least she supports you, even if Spiky's stopped groaning into his hands and is now staring at you in confused horror.

The Marines just flick their gazes between you and the pirates like watching a tennis match.

Ace splutters in increased F U R Y now, the fat dude glaring up at you with... wow, you're pretty sure that's sheer loathing. "What?! You can't get married! Has Pops even met her?!"

So old-fashioned! What, do they want a sit-down meeting between Whitebeard and Masoyashi's father so they can arrange a dowry or something?! Ridiculous! Especially when Whitebeard's not even your father!

>and here's the new one

You draw yourself up, straight as you can. "My father is Silvers Rayleigh, dumbass! Besides, Captain Stefan's given his blessing, and that's all we need!"

Firefist sure is twitching (although to be fair, so are all the Marines), as he reaches up to tug at his hair. "Cap-? STEFAN'S A DOG!!"

"Rowf!" A fine addition from your Captain.

You nod, smug. "Yeah, you tell 'im, Captain!"

"YOU CAN'T HAVE A DOG AS YOUR CAPTAIN!!"

Ew. You stare down at him, appalled. "... What are you, some kind of racist?"

"What? No! Rockstar, tell him to stop being ridiculous and come down from there!"

"I can't control him... I can't even try..." Spiky moans, barely loud enough to be heard. Fortunately the Marines are being wonderfully quiet, except for a couple of them making hurried reports into their den dens.

Firefist's eyes narrow as he glares up at you, while fat dude flexes his hands into a fist.

"Screw this. Harry, if you're not going to come with us willingly, you'll be coming by force!" Ace folds his arms, face set. "Last chance! Come back with us, and we'll see about this marriage thing."

>Hmmmm......... nah-thanks-bye. (RUN FOR THE DOCKS)
>Captain Stefan refuses to let me leave the crew, so I can't. Soooooorrrrrryyyyyyy.
>Spiky, Kato! Defend me! Or my dad'll kick your asses!
>Other

>>3535987
>shakkylaughingforever.gif
>>
>>3535996
stefan in a tiny suit
>>
>>3536003
>> You make a compelling argument. (RUN FOR THE DOCKS)
>>
>>3536003
>>Hmmmm......... nah-thanks-bye. (RUN FOR THE DOCKS)
>>
>>3536003
NO U (Run for the docks).
>>
>>3536003
>Oh shit! Is that Kaido!? (RUN FOR THE DOCKS)
>>
>>3536003
>>Hmmmm......... nah-thanks-bye. (RUN FOR THE DOCKS)
The Harry who only started fighting a few months ago fights all the time
The Harry who's been training his whole life under Roger's first mate fails and runs from battle
>>
>>3536003
>Hmmmm......... nah-thanks-bye. (RUN FOR THE DOCKS)
>>
>>3536003
>>Hmmmm......... nah-thanks-bye. (RUN FOR THE DOCKS)
>>
>>3536003
>>Hmmmm......... nah-thanks-bye. (RUN FOR THE DOCKS)
>>
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>>3536017
Perfectly balanced, as all things should be.
>>
>>3536003
>Hey look its Hero of the Marines Garp! (RUN FOR THE DOCKS)
>>
>>3536008
Supporting
>>
>>3536003
>Hmmmm......... nah-thanks-bye. (RUN FOR THE DOCKS)
>>
>>3536008
>>3536003

This is funnier


Also... Silvers is trying to avoid all the dads.
>>
>>3536003
>>3536008
+1
>>
>>3536017
Finally, my beautiful non-combat quest...

>disappear like a ninja

You press a finger against your lips, looking thoughtful. "Hmmmm...." Masawifey-chwaaaan probably has the boat by now, right? "Nah-thanks-bye."

Then you turn and flee towards the docks, to the strangled scream of Ace, and the excited borks of your Captain.

RUN, RUN, AS FAST AS YOU CAN, THEY CAN'T CATCH YOU, YOU'RE THE... BIG SWORD... SILVERS... PIRATE... MAN?

>Roll 1d100, best of 3 for roof-chase! Will gravity be your eternal foe?!
>>
Rolled 39 (1d100)

>>3536053
gravity will be our waifu
>>
Rolled 26 (1d100)

>>3536053
>>
Rolled 43 (1d100)

>>3536053
>>
Rolled 77 (1d100)

>>3536053
>>
>>3536054
>>3536055
>>3536056
because clearly we've fallen for it hard
>>
>>3536057
>Rolled 77 (1d100)
NegHarry is a go!
Roofing can't keep us down!
>>
Rolled 4, 30 = 34 (2d100)

>>3536054
Apparently not!

>43

You run across the rooftops like a man being chased by HOLY CRAP THEY'RE FAST

Well, Firefist Ace is, anyway - fat dude, from the occasional flash you get of him, is running down on the street; Ace meanwhile has joined you on the roof, not using his fire too much yet, but catching up quickly in long, easy strides.

... Damn Logia assholes! Damn Commander assholes!

"Stop chasing me!" You don't dare look over your shoulder any more, the speedy jerk.

"No!" Okay, not unexpected. Although your foot going through some shoddy tiling is.

With a panicked cry, you stumble, caught up to your ankle in the stupid, shitty roof, catching yourself with your hands as you fall.

It only takes a second for JerkfAce to catch up, coming to a stop by your side as you try to pull your foot out of the hole.

"Harry..." he says, warningly, slowly reaching out to you. "I don't wanna hurt my brothers, but Pops already ordered me to bring you back. So settle down and come back with us, okay?"

>Draw a weapon!
>Pull your leg out and D O D G E his grip!
>Pretend to give up.
>Other?
>>
Rolled 44 (1d100)

>>3536072
>4
OH NO
>>
>>3536072
>Pull your leg out and D O D G E his grip!
Our fiance is waiting!
>>
>Try to flood the place in darkness to run? it works like that right?
>>
>>3536072
>Summon the D A R K N E S S
>>
>>3536072
>>BECOME THE MIGHTY SQUID (Flood with darkness)
>>
>>3536072
>>3536079
Supporting. Finally our totally useless Devil Fruit can actually help us! If only we had found a good one to begin with! Woe is Darkman!
>>
>>3536072
OK! I'M WILL GO TO YOUR SHIP!
>>
>>3536072
>Pull your leg out and D O D G E his grip!
>>
>>3536075
FOUR IS DEATH.
>>
>>3536072
>>Pull your leg out and D O D G E his grip!
>>
>>3536072
>>BECOME THE MIGHTY SQUID (Flood with darkness)
>>
>>3536072
>Pull your leg out and D O D G E his grip!
>>
>>3536072
>Summon the D A R K N E S S
>>
>>3536075
If something happened to our fiance there will be casualties
>>
>>3536072
>>BECOME THE MIGHTY SQUID (Flood with darkness)
>>
Rolled 3, 61 = 64 (2d100)

>>3536086
Masayoshi got four and then a DOUBLE 4 (aka 44)... I think this means ur waifu is ded, yes?

First roll is for Masaaaaa~

>Roll 1d100, best of 3 for becoming a goth
>>
Rolled 12 (1d100)

>>3536099
>>
Rolled 83 (1d100)

>>3536099
>>
Rolled 24 (1d100)

>>3536099
No! She will not die!
>>
Rolled 65 (1d100)

>>3536099
People will die
>>
Rolled 95 (1d100)

>>3536099
Shoujo quest becomes tragedy quest?
>>
Rolled 18 (1d100)

>>3536099
>3

...... Masayoshi is not doing too good......

>>3536106
>95
APPARENTLY
>>
>>3536099
The dice gods give hope only to inflict the utmost despair.

RIP Waifu
>>
>dice gods have been shown to detest waifuing in the main quest
>allows for a waifu in sidequest
>immediately kills her
deus vult
>>
>>3536120
BPQM's handrubbing intensifies
>>
Okay, do you guys want to keep the waifu? You can let her die OR you can make a sacrifice...

It won't involve Stefan or your Devil Fruit, but I won't tell you exactly what it entails.
>>
>>3536128
>Sacrifice

Punished Harry confirmed
>>
>>3536128
Sacrifice for dice Gods!!!
>>
>>3536128
>Sacrifice
FOR TRUE LOVE
>>
>>3536128
I for one am ready for a sacrifice.
>>
>>3536128
>sacrifice
D E U S V U L T
>>
>>3536128
What sort of question is that?
Make the sacrifice.
>>
>>3536128
Kill the waifu.
The conflict with Whitebeard must escalate further.
>>
>>3536128
100% Sacrifice. If she dies her father will kill us anyway, and the tone of this adventure will change too much.

I like the comedic/silly tone it has right now.
>>
>>3536128
>sacrifice

This ain't no tragedy, it's a comedy

SOCIETY
BOTTOM TEXT
>>
>sacrifice
also i really want the sacrifice to be something we clearly did to save her and witnessed by many
>>
>>3536128
>Sacrificing our pp for true love! We may have met more moments ago but our love is strong!
>>
>>3536149
>harry sees a cannon pointed her way
>jumps in front
>gets knocked out and develops amnesia again
>>
>>3536128
>sacrifice
>>
>>3536128
As long as she's fine, I don't care if the witebeards use her as a way to make us surrender.
>>
Vult hooo
>>
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>>3536128
Only one choice.
>>
SACRIFICE CONFIRMED

hehehehehehe I'll tell you when it comes.

>83+ previous training, noice

You stare up at Ace as he carefully reaches towards you...

And then you make like a squid and ink him.

.... By which you mean that you twist that Devil Fruit power of yours in a way that's never felt so natural or smooth in all your training, and end up with darkness pouring out of you, billowing out, all light vanishing in an instant.

Darkness surrounds you.

"... Okay, what the hell?" Ace's voice, oddly muffled, is annoyed but not scared. All right. He's in the darkness stuff you've emitted.

Now what?

>"Hahahahaha! I have you now! Leave, or, um, face my... swords?"
>Try and use the darkness (how?)
>Try and stealthily leave.
>Other?
>>
Also, I'm amazed you guys are willing to blindly sacrifice to protect a hastily thrown together, shoddily written waifu. You guys just really wanna piss off Akainu, don't you?
>>
>>3536183
>Try and use the darkness
>Make him trip over your foot.
>>
>>3536187
Support
>>
>>3536183
>>Try and stealthily leave.

>>3536186
I don't know what you're talking about, our beautiful magmamuffin is greatly written, along with the romance we have with her.
>>
>>3536183
>Try and stealthily leave.

>>3536186
Yes. We're a Shoujo protagonist now.
>>
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>>3536186
to be honest, i mainly picked sacrifice because A. everyone else was doing it and i'm a fucking sheep and B. I thought it was to sacrifice her to die, not sacrifice ourselves for her.
i need to fucking sleep.
>>
>>3536183
>Try and stealthily leave.

>>3536186
>Piss off Akainu
Curses! My brilliant scheme so easily discovered!
>>
>>3536183
>>Try and stealthily leave.
>>
>>3536186
>You guys just really wanna piss off Akainu, don't you?
Let's be honest here, doing that is not exactly a challenge!
>>
>>3536195
That's right! I'm as cunning as I am subtle! ... Wait..

>Roll 1d100 best of 3 for stealth
>>
>>3536183
>>Try and stealthily leave.
>>
Rolled 88 (1d100)

>>3536204
>>
Rolled 61 (1d100)

>>3536204
>>
Rolled 78 (1d100)

>>3536204
>>
>88 + 10 = 98

You carefully lift your foot out of the hole, one arm wrapped around Stefan, the other helping you crawl carefully away.

Ace must have tried to grab you and failed, because as you edge yourself further still, you hear him again. "Harry? Harry, that was your Devil Fruit, right? Are you okay?"

Crawl crawl craaaawwwwl~ ignoring the Commander, you reach the edge of the darkness... bubble?... and carefully peek out.

... should be a simple run to the docks from here!

"SILVERS HARRY!" The voice booms from out of nowhere, before you realize it's from someone on the street. "YOU'RE UNDER ARREST! SURRENDER YOURAELF INTO CUSTODY IMMEDIATELY, AND YOUR SENTENCE WILL BE LENIENT."

Meh.

>Have a quick chat with the Marines...
>Don't let the pirates seize you! Get running!
>Take someone hostage! They won't attack you then!
>Other?

I really gotta sleep, sorry. Thanks for playing, and good night!
>>
>>3536242
>Have a quick chat with the Marines...
This is all just a misunderstanding...
>>
>>3536242
>>Don't let the pirates seize you! Get running!
>>
>>3536242
>>Have a quick chat with the Marines...
>>
>>3536242
>>Don't let the pirates seize you! Get running!
>>
>>3536242
>Don't let the pirates seize you! Get running!
>>
>>3536242
>>Don't let the pirates seize you! Get running!
Stick to the P L A N
>>
>>3536242
>Don't let the pirates seize you! Get running!
>>
>>3536242
>Don't let the pirates seize you! Get running!
Run run run
>>
>>3536242
>>Don't let the pirates seize you! Get running!
>>
>>3536242
>RUN
Our sweet macaron is waiting for us
>>
>>3536242
>Don't let the pirates seize you! Get running!
>>
>>3536242
>>Have a quick chat with the Marines...
...have we actually commited any crimes?
>>
>>3536263
We did break into a Marine base and sorta implied that we kidnapped our waifu
>>
>>3536263
Trespassing on Marine grounds, for one.
Being the son of the late Pirate King's first mate (not an actual crime but pffft, try telling that to the WGO or the Marines)
>>
>>3536263
Multiple stances of kidnapping, trespassing, piracy,... Yeah totally innocent.
>>
I'm sorry, but I can't help but hear Silvers as this fine gentleman:

https://youtu.be/7YKb06ERDYs
>>
>>3536281
But are we a cleptomaniac macho-vampire?
No, we are not.
Sadly.
...actually we don't even fight for justice.
>>
>>3536263
Yes.

Against fashion.

>>3536274
Uh, actually, you haven’t committed any piracy? Stealing Stefan and a Devil Fruit doesn’t count, because it was from pirates, so the Government would be more likely to reward you for it... you haven’t actually kidnapped anyone (again, Stefan doesn’t count) either.

You DID trespass in a Marine base and have got Marine files sticking out of your pocket though, so there’s that!
>>
>>3537210
>You DID trespass in a Marine base and have got Marine files sticking out of your pocket though, so there’s that!

But our fiancée works there, don't they have some policies for family members and all that?
>>
>>3537244
... You know what, you’re absolutely right. Apart from the files, which can be explained as an accident, you’ve done absolutely nothing wrong.

Congratulations. Akainu technically has nothing legal to kill you over.
>>
>>3537249
Pffft ahahaha--oh wait, you're serious. Yeah, like that shit's gonna fly with Admiral Magma.
>>
>>3537286
>Akainu tries to kill us once.
>We sue.
>His main argument is that we are a pirate.
>We haven't commited a single crime in our lives.
>We tell the judge Akainu is angry because we are marrying his daughter.
>He tries to kill us again, right in front of the jury and gets a flaw in his expedient.
>He is given a choice: Apologize and give Harry your blessing or get banned from Admiral position.
>He tries to murder Harry in front of everyone, again and loses his charge as Vice-Admiral.
>We save Ace and Withebeard from dying at Ace's execution and get an official apologize from the Marine.
PROFIT.
>>
>>3537320
>He is forced to let us marry his daughter.
>Masayoshi is just happy her father approves of us.
>He totally doesn't approves of us.
>Instead, he constantly tries to kill us off.
>Doesn't want to hurt his daughter feelings tho, so does it behind her back.
>We also don't want our wife to be sad or angry at her family, so we keep shut about her father attempts at our life.
>Cue every time she turns her head away we are fighting for our life against Akainu, just to pretend to get along like father and son when shes looking our way again.
>Because to know we actively hate and try to kill each other would break her heart, and neither of us could stand that.
>>
>>3537249
Our dad is gold Rogers first mate. That’s plenty.
>>
>>3537389
We've upgraded from Shoujo quest to Looney Toons Quest. Akainu is now our Magma Daffy Duck.
>>
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>>3537462
me:you have things to do!
also me:just... 5minutes mmkay?
me:sigh.
>>
>>3537462
>>3537539
...Now I can't stop imagining Silvers Harry as Goofy.
>>
>>3537542
>goofy
You mean Bugs Bunny I hope.
Goofy isn't a Loony Toon.
>>
>>3537548
>Goofy isn't a Loony Toon.
...How the HELL did I mess up like this??
Well, in my defense it's been ages since I've last seen a Loony Tunes episode.
Not that I'm getting old. Nope. Definitely not!
>>
>>3537556
It's Silvers Harry, if anyone's going to wander into a rival franchise by sheer accident, it'll be him.

>>3537539
New canon appearance!

WRIIIIIIITIIIIIINNNNGGGGG
>>
>>3537572
ACTUALLY NOT WRITING BECAUSE I NEED ROLLS

>Roll 1d100 best of 3 to get to the docks without being caught by WB pirates/Redhaired pirates/Marines/magical-teleporting-Akainu.
>>
Rolled 11 (1d100)

>>3537574
Is it time for us to die?
>>
Rolled 53 (1d100)

>>3537574
>>
Rolled 36 (1d100)

>>3537574
>>
Rolled 45 (1d100)

>>3537574
>>
>>3537539
>Marine Season!
>Pirate Season!
>Marine Season!
>Pirate Season!
>Pirate Season!
>Marine Season! Fire!
>>
>>3537576
Apparently, yes.

>53, return of mediocrity quest

You get to your feet, Stefan under one arm, and run.

Ace is probably still in the darkness, so you only have about a billion other people to worry about. You can do this!

"THERE HE IS!"

"GET 'IM!"

Across the rooftop, jump a gap, careful not to slip on tiles or moss - you twist around some shitty rooftop ornament, listening to the sound of rushing feet below and behind you.

"CALL REINFORCEMENTS!"

"SHOOT HIM! JUST SHOOT HIM!"

You should reach the docks before them at this rate. Nothing can possibly go wrong!

Wait. Ahead of you, a gloved hand grips the side of the roof, heaving themself up to reveal... Hood-o?

"Justice... is served...!" They pant, dragging themself up onto the roof, dusting down their robes as you race towards them, a bloodstained knife in their other hand. "Ha! Take tha- huh? What are you doing here, Blood Fetish Man?"

>RUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNN!!
>CAN'T TALK NOW BYE SEE YA
>(A Marine! Take them hostage!)
>Other?
>>
>>3537614
>WELCOME ABOARD FIRST MATE.
>Take them hos- I mean, employ them.
>>
>>3537614
>NO TIME TO EXPLAIN
>(Grab him)
>>
>>3537614
>>WHITEBEARDS AND MARINES!
>>RUUUUUNNNNNN!
>>
>>3537614
>RUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNN!!
>>
>>3537614
>RUUUUUUUUNNNNNNNN!!

Yeah, we are taking this one too
>>
>>3537614
>FOLLOW ME IF YOU WANT TO LIVE!
>>
>>3537614
>MARINES!
>NIGERUNDAYO!
>>
Rolled 57, 74, 85, 51, 65, 87, 80, 41, 50, 63, 82, 30, 74, 17, 22, 80, 88, 83, 51, 92 = 1272 (20d100)

Mediocrity, Mediocrity pls go away and never come back again

Get Akainu'd Mediocrity
>>
>>3537614
>A marine! Chuck him at the pirates!

If we don't fight then we can't possibly be mediocre!
>>
>>3537676
>Rolled 57, 74, 85, 51, 65, 87, 80, 41, 50, 63, 82, 30, 74, 17, 22, 80, 88, 83, 51, 92 = 1272 (20d100)
Average is 1010. So we're not mediocre!
>>
>>3537680
As stated before, we are actually totally innocent, therefore marines harming an innocent makes THEM the pirates
>>
>pity you never found the phantom

"RUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNNNN!"

Sure, the guy's a Marine or an affiliate, or he wouldn't have been in the base. But that stop him from being hurt by one of the pirates or a stray bullet. Or gravity.

Gravity is evil.

"Wha-?"

No time for that! You snag his robes as you rush past, dragging him along for the ride, stumbling at first until he regains his balance.

A dog in one hand, a Marine in the other. How about that.

"IT'S THE PHANTOM! HE'S WORKING WITH THE PHANTOM!"

A flurry of bullets are sent at you, while you look desperately around for a glimpse of the Phantom. He turns up NOW?! You can't collect his bounty like this!

"Where are we gooooooooing?!" Hood-o's panicked wail breaks through the sound of gunfire as you duck and dodge under the bullets, shoving him along too. Stefan barks happily, doggy grin on his face.

>TO THE DOCKS!
>TO ADVENTURE!
>TO HELL!
>I DON'T KNOW!
>Other?
>>
>>3537699
>>TO THE DOCKS!
>>TO ADVENTURE!
>>TO HELL!
>>I DON'T KNOW!
In that order
>>
>>3537701
Actually, wait, just the last three would be better, I think.
>>
>>3537699
>>TO THE DOCKS!
>>TO ADVENTURE!
>>
>>3537699
>TO MY FIANCÉ
>>
>>3537699
>TO NOT HERE!
>>
>>3537699
>>3537708
Support
>>
Rolled 49, 99, 69 = 217 (3d100)

Background stufffffff

WB, RH, mystery
>>
>>3537718
Heeeeeey, all ending in 9. Noice.
>>
>>3537718
>Redhaired 99
Hypercompetency activate!
>>
>>3537722
Because if Harry dies, then /they/ die
>>
>>3537699
>TO THE DOCKS!
>TO ADVENTURE!
>TO MY FIANCÉ
>>
>>3537693
No Admiral Dad, you was the Pirates.
>>
>>3537718
>WB 49
So it's not just Ace. The whole crew jobs.
>>
>>3537699
>>3537708
>>TO MY FIANCÉ
Aaand forgot to vote. This.
>>
>>3537737
BUT THEN WHO WAS DEN DEN??

>to impel down

"TO THE DOCKS! TO ADVENTURE! TO MY FIANCÉE!"

"But I don't waaaaaaannnaaaaaaa~!" Hood-o wails, flailing their knife around. "Help! Help! I'm being kidnapped by a blood-loving pervert! He's gonna bleed me out!"

Well. That's just rude. "I'm not a pervert! And I don't like blood!"

"And he's a liar! HEEEEELLLLPPPP!!"

"SILVERS! Ditch the dead weight and speed it up!" Oh, hey, there's Spiky; running along the opposite side's rooftops, looking pissed off. Kato, running beside him, looks pretty cheery. She waves across at you.

>THIS IS MY MARINE NOW!
>HUH? BUT I ALREADY DITCHED YOU?
>I'M SORRY, BUT THIS IS WHERE WE SPLIT! IT'S NOT YOU, IT'S ME. BUT MOSTLY YOU.
>Other?


>>3537752
To be fair, you did dognap their top man.
>>
>>3537770
>>I'M SORRY, BUT THIS IS WHERE WE SPLIT! IT'S NOT YOU, IT'S ME. BUT MOSTLY YOU.
>>
>>3537770
>>I'M SORRY, BUT THIS IS WHERE WE SPLIT! IT'S NOT YOU, IT'S ME. BUT MOSTLY YOU.
>>
>>3537770
>Shouting: DON'T WORRY WE HAVE AN ESCAPE ROUTE! KEEP QUIET THO SO THE MARINES DON'T FIND OUT
>Also: THIS GUY IS MY SOUVENIR
>>
>>3537770
>I'M SORRY, BUT THIS IS WHERE WE SPLIT! IT'S NOT YOU, IT'S ME. BUT MOSTLY YOU.
>>
Rolled 63 (1d100)

>>3537752
>>3537770
Rolling for Oyaji to smack some jobbers
>>
>>3537770
>THIS IS MY MARINE NOW!

Aw, let's keep Phantom too.

This Flash might have a problem getting attached to stuff too fast.

And by stuff I meant people and animals he kidnaps.
>>
Rolled 56 (1d100)

>>3537785
Even Pops is slacking off...
Rolling for Thatch to whip everyone into shape!
>>
>>3537770
>A PIRATE NEVER LEAVES A MAN BEHIND! WELL, MAYBE THEY DO, BUT NOT SILVERS HARRY!
>>
>>3537793
>Family of Jobbers
>WB is STILL the best of the lot

Did the entire crew get cursed or something
>>
>>3537793
Pops is too busy laughing to fight straight. He needs a medic to reattach his sides.
>>
Rolled 78 (1d100)

>them's the breaks

"I'M SORRY, BUT THIS IS WHERE WE SPLIT! IT'S NOT YOU, IT'S ME. BUT MOSTLY YOU."

Spiky sure is twitchy today. "ABSOLUTELY NOT! YOU'RE COMING WITH US!"

"LIKE HELL!" Oh, and there's Ace, coming in from behind. You wonder where fatty is. "HE'S COMING BACK TO HIS BROTHERS!"

"I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S HAPPENING AND I DON'T LIKE IIIIIIIIIIIIT," Hood-o helpfully adds. They're yours now. Yours to feed and play with and take for walks.

"YOU'RE *ALL* COMING WITH US," screams one of the Marines from below.

"MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS," the assembled assorted criminals yell back, followed by more bullets in all of your general directions.

It's not far to the docks now, but all these guys could be a problem...

>SPIKY! DELAY THE WHITEBEARDS AND I'LL MAKE SURE DAD WON'T DO ANYTHING TO YOU!
>Firejerk! Delay the Redhaireds and I'll accept one Whitebeard pirate as a brother!
>Marines! You can arrest me if you protect me from the pirates!
>Other?

Rolling for Marco competence?
>>
>>3537840
>SPIKY! DELAY THE WHITEBEARDS AND I'LL MAKE YOU THE BEST MAN
>>
>I AM GOING BACK TO MY FIANCE AND THATS THE END OF IT! MASAYOSHI MY DEAR I'M COMING FOR YOU!
>Darkness flood everything
>>
>>3537840
>SPIKY! DELAY THE WHITEBEARDS AND I'LL MAKE SURE DAD WON'T DO ANYTHING TO YOU!
>>
>>3537840
>>3537850
>>SPIKY! DELAY THE WHITEBEARDS AND I'LL MAKE YOU THE BEST MAN
I love this. I suspect Spiky will not. Backing.
>>
>>3537840
>>SPIKY! DELAY THE WHITEBEARDS AND I'LL MAKE SURE DAD WON'T DO ANYTHING TO YOU!
>>
>>3537840
>>SPIKY! DELAY THE WHITEBEARDS AND I'LL MAKE YOU THE BEST MAN
>>
>>3537840
>SPIKY! DELAY THE WHITEBEARDS AND I'LL MAKE YOU THE BEST MAN
+
>Throw Hood-man at Ace
>>
Rolled 40, 2, 57 = 99 (3d100)

>see, if you'd said you'd get silvers off his back, he'd have agreed...

Hm.

"SPIKY! DELAY THE WHITEBEARDS AND I'LL MAKE YOU THE BEST MAN!"

".... LIKE FUUUUUUUCCCCCKKKK!!!"

Oh. Looks like he's not messing around any more, by the way he's throwing himself across the street, slamming down onto a rooftop behind you. "Firefist! Truce to grab him and get him away from the Marines, THEN we can fight for him!"

"Agreed!"

Oh. That's not good.

"WHY MEEEEEEEEEEE~" Hood-o wails. You'd pat his head, but your hands aren't really free for that.

At least you can see the docks up ahead - but it sounds like the two behind you are speeding up as well...

>Roll 1d100, best of 3 to get to the docks in good time!

Rolls for Ace+Rockstar, Marines, ???
>>
Rolled 60 (1d100)

>>3537900
>>
Rolled 78 (1d100)

>>3537900
For Love!
>>
Rolled 17 (1d100)

>>3537900
>>
Rolled 28 (1d100)

>>3537900

>40, 2, 57
HAHAHA
>>
>>3537900
See what happens to the Marines when they don't have the glorious Commander Flashman to raise morale?
>>
>>3537912
>See what happens to [anyone] when they don't have the glorious Commander Flashman to raise morale?
It's the same regardless.
>>
Rolled 26, 74 = 100 (2d100)

>>3537905
Satan saying 'for love' is a little...

Screw this! Your fiancée is waiting!

You reach deep into the depths of your HEART, legs speeding up (with an accompanying yelp from Hood-o).

You are SPEED INCARNATE.

Or at least faster than the others - it turns out the Marines have mostly been led down a dead-end (you learn some new swear words), and leaving them behind is no problem.

The pirates are... a little trickier. Kato doesn't seem particularly bothered about catching you, by the way she's laughing, but the pair behind you are obviously way more interested.

"GET BACK HERE!"

"YOU CAN PLAY WITH STEFAN EVERY DAY IF YOU JUST COME WITH US!"

"YOUR DAD IS GONNA KILL ME, YOU BRAT!"

Boooooriiiiiiing.

At least now you're at the docks - throwing yourself down from the final rooftop, you yank Hood-o to his feet, rushing towards the ships.

Whitebeard boat, Whitebeard boat... where's your cutey-pie snuggle-muffin?

>Roll 1d100, best of 3 to find mini-Akainu

Rolling for background stuff
>>
>>3537900
>see, if you'd said you'd get silvers off his back, he'd have agreed...
We play Silverman as realistically as possibly, we don't metagame with our favourite pirate.
>>
Rolled 11 (1d100)

>>3537932
>>
Rolled 32 (1d100)

>>3537932
>>
Rolled 81 (1d100)

>>3537932
>>
Rolled 38 (1d100)

>>3537932
I am Shoujo incarnate. You cant stop me.
>>
>>3537937
>Rolled 81 (1d100)
Thank you anon!
>>
>>3537939
...Well maybe the dice can. Foiled by God again!
>>
Now we probably need to rescue her because the WB ship was probably full of people and she was only a single marine.
>>
>>3537932
If we ever need an alias I propose we call ourselves Oliver Silverman... Maybe?
>>
>>3537956
Silvers Harryman
>>
>>3537960
Truly, our cunning knows no bounds!
>>
>>3537956
Or we could be the Phantom Thief Argentum.
>>
>81, boooooooo

You spot your angelic pumpkin easily enough - the Whitebeard boat is small, much like the Redhaired one you can on, easily handled by just a couple of people, and they aren't stupid enough to fly their jolly roger.

Instead, Masayoshi stands on the deck, raising her arm in a wave once she sees you, before turning to quickly head for the helm.

Boat acquired!

You toss Hood-o over your shoulder (he really likes kicking and flailing, but he isn't trying to stab you, so that's nice) and jump from the docks to boat's deck as Masayoshi starts casting off.

"Look! I brought a souvenir!"

"I-is that the Phantom?!" She pauses in her work, then speeds up again as a pair of furious pirates hurtle into sight.

"Nah, the Marines were chasing the Phantom somewhere else while I was running," you tell her, dropping the weeping Hood-o and placing Stefan down next to him. "Let's get gone!"

The boat leaves port as quickly as the pair of you can manage it - which wouldn't be much of a problem for two Emperor's men, so you make a show of drawing your pistols to demonstrate exactly what will happen if they try to jump aboard.

"FUCK YOOOOOOOOOOOU," Spiky yells from the dock.

Ace is more practical, as he becomes a small figure in the distance. "WHY *OUR* SHIP?!"

"They'll get another ship and be after us soon," your pleasantly-shaped koala muses, checking the wind gauge. "The good news is, I've set us on a course directly towards the Vice Admiral's patrol! We'll lure them right into him!"

"Please... let me gooooo..." Hood-o sobs, curled up on the deck.

>Uh... maybe we should head away from this Vice Admiral? For reasons.
>Darling, have I mentioned I'm a pirate?
>Hood-o, you have to understand... you're mine now.
>Other?

Heading out, update laterish.
>>
>>3537974
Face it anon, we lack the tact for such a title.
We may have the energy and flamboyance, but we still lack the skill.
>>
>>3537988
>Firefist Abs is with them! We should direct them away from this Vice Admiral.. For his safety.
>>
>>3537988
>Acquiesce to Hood-o's request. Drop 'em on the deck.
>>Darling, have I mentioned I'm a pirate?
Compromise and communication are the keys to creating life-long relationships, friendships or otherwise!
>>
>>3537988
>>Firefist Abs is with them! We should direct them away from this Vice Admiral.. For his safety.
>>Acquiesce to Hood-o's request. Drop 'em on the deck.

Technically we haven't stolen anything from anyone who isn't a pirate, so are we truly a pirate?
>>
>>3537988
>>Darling, have I mentioned I'm a pirate?
>>
>>3537988
Good thinking darling

After this I was thinking maybe you could take a vacation from marine work, sail the world with me, have grand adventures, and get to know each other more intimately (like what's your favorite color)

Would you sail away with me?

>say all this while posing dramatically on the front of the ship,our shirt somewhat ripped open and our chest glistening in the sun
>>
>>3537988
>Vice admiral who exactly?


>Darling, have I mentioned I'm a pirate?
I don't remember us doing any acts of piracy
>>
>>3537996
>>3538002
We're not a pirate, we're a free spirit!
>>
>>3537988
>Who's the Vice-Admiral again?
>Acquiesce to Hood-o's request. Drop 'em on the deck.
>>
>>3538007
>>3538005
Harry's a pirate where it counts. In the heart!
>>
>>3537988
>Uh, me being the son of a Pirate isn't going to he a problem right?
If she asks who, give Dad person's name

>Hey Hood-o, you wanted a big bounty right? We'll get you a huge one this way!
>>
>>3537988
>Hood-o, you have to understand... you're mine now.
>Firefist Abs is with them! We should direct them away from this Vice Admiral.. For his safety.
>The admiral might be able to handle him, but not his men. Too many people will get hurt in that fight.
>>
>Darling, have I mentioned I'm a pirate?
>>
>>3538009
A pirate of the heart! A buccaneer of the soul!
>>
>>3537990
We can just show up when everything is already done. Flamboyantly.
>>
>>3537988
>Firefist Abs is with them! We should direct them away from this Vice Admiral.. For his safety.
>Hood-o, you have to understand... you're mine now.
>>
>>3538008
Supporting
>>
>>3537988
>>3537988 #
>Firefist Abs is with them! We should direct them away from this Vice Admiral.. For his safety.
>Hood-o, you have to understand... you're mine now.
Also something something you'll get a big bounty if you hang with us.
>>
I'd just like to point out that you already dropped Hood-o on the deck. As was written in the update. And it specifically mentions them curled up on deck.

Juuuust saying. Tallying up!
>>
>>3538053
I wish I learned how to read
>>
>>3538053
I noticed that as well after posting. If I was dropped twice, I'd realized I'd been let go too.
>>
>>3538064
I wish I'd learned how to write...

>was a mish-mash, but this one won out

Yiiiiiiiiikes, that could be trouble.

"Firefist Abs is with them! We should direct them away from this Vice Admiral.. For his safety." Yes! The safety of the Vice Admiral! Perfect!

Your vanilla cupcake smiles radiantly, like a double-Sun of ultra-brightness. Or something. "There's no need to worry about that guy, Harry. Once we've baited them into his range, Vice Admiral Klaus will go through them easily."

Oh shit. The 'Sword Saint' himself.

On the other hand, you don't actually have a bounty, or even have to meet him... and he'd definitely at least delay your pursuers, right?

>Nooooooooooo, I think we should just... run away. Together. And get married. Darling.
>I guess we could just sort of... race past him? I'm allergic to Vice Admirals.
>Okay, but I need to wear a disguise. Because, uh, I just feel the need to dress up sometimes.
>Other?
>>
>>3538103
>>I guess we could just sort of... race past him? I'm allergic to Vice Admirals.
>>
>>3538103
Pffft oh no.
>>
>>3538105
RUN AWAY FROM ALL THE DADS QUEST
>>
>>3538103
>I guess we could just sort of... race past him? I'm allergic to Vice Admirals

Also
>Klaus
Ah, Smoboss had a Pink Flamingo made with Klaus' personal stash while reading Fop's trashy novels
Now it all makes sense
Pls tell me Smoker is Fleet Admiral in this reality
>>
>>3538111
We go on the run and are pursued by the World Government's most elite Marine team.

Dangerous
Acquisitions and
Disposal
Squad
>>
File: I MUST SPIN.gif (76 KB, 379x365)
76 KB
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>>3538103
>Vice Admiral Klaus
I didn't think I could make a sound that high. This makes me very happy.
>>Okay.
No disguises. Let's just meet him.
>>
>>3538103
>Confess. Your father is a pirate and the marines want to catch you even if you've never committed a crime.

Let's try the injustice angle.
>>
>>3538103
>>I guess we could just sort of... race past him? I'm allergic to Vice Admirals.
Is this Klaus a teetotaler as well? Alternate timelines are a hell of a thing
>>
>Confess. Your father is a pirate and the marines want to catch you even if you've never committed a crime.

We are a misunderstoond man, pursued by an unfair justice, and her father is one of the leaders that wish to punish us for the crime of being born. If she doesnt immediately pass out from sheer joy at living in a romance novel i give up
>>
>>3538103
>I guess we could just sort of... race past him? I'm allergic to Vice Admirals
> And a disguise helps keep those allergies away.

>Sword saint Klaus
...Smoker's mind is a glorious thing

>>3538112
Nah Smoker is obviously the fifth yonko
>>
>>3538103
>Confess. Your father is a pirate and the marines want to catch you even if you've never committed a crime.
>>
>>3538103
>>I guess we could just sort of... race past him? I'm allergic to Vice Admirals.
>>
>>3538132
Support.
Play up a tragic backstory. Condemned by circumstances of our birth, never given a chance!
>>
>>3538103
>Confess. Your father is a pirate and the marines want to catch you even if you've never committed a crime.

Silvers is just a completr mess isnt he?
>Im running away from my Pirate father.
>Masa: "Why? Do you want to be a Marine?"
>No! I want to be a Pirate!
Also, Vice Admiral Klaus, whats next Shichibukai Mina?
>>
>>3538103
>>3538123
I'll switch to
>>3538119
>>
>>3538123
PapaSmo and I are united in the desire for a world where Klaus is happy, okay?!

....... But even in Smoker's wildest imagination, a teetotal Klaus is too implausible.

>gotta go fast

"I guess we could just sort of... race past him? I'm allergic to Vice Admirals." Uuuuugh, as long as your boat is fast enough, you can let the Marines intercept your pursuers, while you, sugar-cookie, Stefan and your new... thing... get away.

Masayoshi frowns, adjusting the boat's course slightly. "Is there some kind of issue?"

>C O N F E S S
>I... I can't tell you yet... It's too much... (stare dramatically and mysteriously out to sea)
>My father is... a high-ranking Marine. I can't be seen, or they'll make me go back home!
>Other?

Tally-Ho made a tie just as I finished writing this, so you confess in the next vote if you want, or complicate things further.

>>3538148
And then Satan pulls it to confess entirely! Damn you, Satan! Damn you to Heaven!
>>
>>3538154
>>C O N F E S S
>>
>>3538154
C O N F E S S
>>
>>3538154
>>I... I can't tell you yet... It's too much... (stare dramatically and mysteriously out to sea)
>>
>>3538154
>C O N F E S S
Forgive me BP for I am sin.
>>
>>3538154
>C O N F E S S
>>
>>3538154
>C O N F E S S
>WE'RE GOOD PIRATES
>We only steal from other pirates!.. So far.
>>
>C O N F E S S
>make it as dramatic as possible, include bits about how "the sea sings to my blood even as my heart pulls me towards you"
>>
>>3538154
>>C O N F E S S
>>
>>3538154
>>C O N F E S S
But also stare mysteriously and dramatically out to sea, do the confession without actually facing her direction

Make sure to ball our hand into a fist real hard to pull off that weird ass anime leather sound
>>
>>3538154
>C O N F E S S
>>
>>3538154
>>C O N F E S S
>>
Rolled 8 (1d100)

>>3538162
[vomiting intensifies]

>>3538158
neva 4giv neva 4get

>confess

....

You can't.

You can't lie to your wuffle-pookie, your cutey-patootie, your cherry sundae princess.

Instead, you drop to one knee, reaching out to clasp one of her hands between your own. Those weird cherry blossoms are falling out of nowhere again.

"H-Harry...?"

"Darling," you say, staring up into her eyes. They're so beautiful, like gelatinous orbs of color and shape and seeing things. "The truth is that my father... is a pirate."

Masayoshi's free hand snaps to her mouth, covering a gasp, as her eyes widen. "Ah! But - plenty of people's parents are criminals... that's not a crime by itself, so... you don't need to worry about that!"

So naive. How endearing. Now... you must break her heart. "Not true..." You glance away, out to sea. The sea that's even wetter than her sight-balls, and significantly more fish-filled. "My father... is the Dark King, Silvers Rayleigh."

..........

..........

..........

"KYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA~~~!!!!!"

"Wait, what?" Oh, Hood-o's listening, too.

>... Are you okay, darling?
>That's a good noise? I think?
>Now you understand... why we must elope!
>Other?

Rolling for more cherry blossoms.
>>
>>3538190
8 is fine. This is fine.
>That's a good noise? I think?
>>
>... Are you okay, darling?

I fucking called it, she is in he perfect world right now and we have completely been established as the romantic interest for the brave protagonist
>>
>>3538190
>>... Are you okay, darling?
>>
Rolled 83 (1d100)

rolling for there being a novel in her pocket with this exact plot, including something about the "dark mysterious power" of the roguish misunderstood male lead
>>
>>3538190
>... Are you okay, darling?

>>3538195
Just like the simulations!
>>
>>3538190
>>Now you understand... why we must elope!
>>
File: 1384492883806.gif (590 KB, 171x217)
590 KB
590 KB GIF
>>3538190
>>Now you understand... why we must elope!
F U L L S H O U J O!
>>
>>3538190
>>Now you understand... why we must elope!
I don't know why you keep putting yourself down OP, those were descriptions worthy of any award winning romance novel
>>
>>3538190
>Now you understand... why we must elope!
>>
can we also tell her how we were betrayed by our employer and have amnesia? jsut drop more literary cliches on her till her brain melts
>>
>>3538216
Yes! We need to do this!
>>
>>3538216
I cant believe I forgot that our employers betrayed us...This really was meant to be.
>>
>>3538190
>... Are you okay, darling?
>>3538216
Finish her!
>>
> tell her a hyper dramatic version of our life since we left Sabaody, the betrayal, the amnesia, the daring escape, the relentless chase, meeting her etc...
>>
>>3538190
>Now you understand... why we must elope!

Romeo and Juliet.

Hope we don't end like them.
>>
>>3538190
>>... Are you okay, darling?
>>
>>3538216
Oh god, we have all the cliches.

>>3538231
And Phantom is just... there. Awkwardly listening.
>>
>>3538190
>>Now you understand... why we must elope!

Hood-o's brand new role on this ship: eternal third wheel
>>
>>3538254
We need to find him a wife too before it's revealed he's a bishounen pretty boy too and we go from Shoujo manga to Otome game.
>>
>>3538259
I really hope that it's Fop somehow.
>>
>>3538259
>inb4 Phantom is a girl.
Love triangle
>>
>>3538213
I'm full of romance... and stomach acid.

>>3538216
Stop, she can only get so aroused...

>let's run awaaaaaaayyyyyy together

You gaze up at her flushed, manic face. At least she hasn't tried to arrest you? You think that's good? Maybe?

"Now you understand..." you continue, because you can't give her chance to break the roll you're on, "... why we must elope!"

"YEEEEESSSSSSS~~~!!!"

"I don't understand anything..." Hood-o whispers.

"I tried to be a simple bodyguard," you lament, "but after my employer shot me in the head, and left me for dead, the Whitebeard pirates who saved me tried to recruit me... but even with my amnesia, I knew it wasn't right!"

She's hyperventilating. Is that normal?

"Th-this..." She lowers her hand from her mouth, reaching to grip your own hands as she stares fervently down at you with her sparkling opti-spheres. "This is... just like my Hanoese comics...!"

"Huh?"

"Nothing!" Her blood-streaked face is alight with some sort of rabid enlightenment as she holds your hands tighter. "Ignore that! Let's get married!"

"I'm still here..." Hood-o mutters.

>(sweep her into a dramatic kiss)
>... Aren't you meant to be piloting the ship?
>And I know just who can marry us!
>Other?
>>
>>3538267
>Love triangle
Why do we have to make him a girl for that to happen. Silvers Harry's beauty is clearly enough to transcend the gender boundary.
>>
>>3538273
>Hoody! Take the wheel!
>(sweep her into a dramatic kiss)
>>
>>3538273
>>(sweep her into a dramatic kiss)
ITS TIME
>>
>>3538273
>>(sweep her into a dramatic kiss)
>>And I know just who can marry us!

DOG CAPTAIN PRIEST
>>
>>3538273
>>... Aren't you meant to be piloting the ship?
>>
>>3538273
>Hoody! Take the wheel!
>(sweep her into a dramatic kiss)
>>
>>3538273
>(sweep her into a dramatic kiss)
>First Mate Dark Hood! We sail for the East Blue!
Inb4 we dont get to kiss cause Smoboss wakes up screaming in abject terror
>>
>>3538289
>rest of the thread becomes Smoboss Interlude Quest
>>
>>3538273
>Aren't you meant to be piloting the ship?
Dramatic! Pacing!
>>
>>3538289
>Captain Stefan
>First Mate Phantom
Guess you're the cabin boy...
>>
>>3538296
Clearly we're vice-captain.
...That's a thing, right?
>>
>>3538296
That's Cabin Man! Nobody expects the real mastermind to be the Cabin Man!
>>
>>3538273
>... Aren't you meant to be piloting the ship?
>(sweep her into a dramatic kiss)
>>
>>3538285
>>3538289
>>3538273
Actually put me down for this. Welcome aboard first mate hood.
>>
>>3538296
Implying there can't be TWO captains.
We could make EVERYONE a captain except Phantom. Phantom is first mate.
>>
>>3538296
Stefan is Double Captain.
>>
>>3538313
Wait, I take that back. We arent the Cabin Man. We're a Pirate Admiral. We just need more boats for our Captains.
>>
>>3538326
>elevating yourself above Stefan
tis mutiny!
>>
>>3538273
>>(sweep her into a dramatic kiss)
>>
>>3538323
Double Captain Stefan of the Gudboi Pirates
>>
>>3538336
>Thinking Admiral is above King
Use your noodle anon.
>>
>>3538343
You don't have Noodle in this quest!
>>
>>3538349
Then we'll steal Arlong's Fish Cow! Or Shirahoshi's big shark!
>>
Rolled 2 (1d3)

>Roll 1d100, first 3 votes for kissu-kissu

Worst of is 1, middle is 2, best is 3.
>>
Rolled 18 (1d100)

>>3538356
Being on the cherry blossoms!
>>
Rolled 78 (1d100)

>>3538356
>>
Rolled 1 (1d100)

>>3538356
>>
Rolled 29 (1d100)

drive her crazy...er
>>
Rolled 33 (1d100)

>>3538356
>>
Rolled 93 (1d100)

>>3538356
>>
Curse my fast hands
>>
>>3538361
god dammit
so did someone try to shoot us or something as we were going for teh kiss or did she turn out to have a seatone earring that collapses us or something?
>>
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>>3538361
*Snort*
of couuuuurrrsseee.
>>
>>3538361
>1
>Go to kiss
>Trip
>Knock her out, and have to hunt down a doctor to heal her
>>
>>3538361
CRIT OVERRIDE

I LOVE YOU
>>
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>>3538361
>>
>>3538361
>1
So...does she turn on us and stab us?
Die from bloodloss?
We pass out because we've never kissed anybody?
Sudden Akainu?
>>
>>3538373
please be sudden Akainu
>>
>>3538361
>They kiss
>She bites
>He licks her face.
>None of them know how kisses work
>>
>>3538381
This is karmic retribution for what I did to Ace.
>>
So tempted to end thread here... so tempted...

>>3538384
........ okay, NOW I'm tempted by this instead. Poor, traumatised Phantom watching her trying to gnaw your cheekbone off while you start licking the dry nosebleed blood off her face.
>>
>>3538384
Silvers has never succeeded at this before, and she has akainu as a dad
>>
>>3538392
Not sure what's worse yet. Ending before the kiss or that.
>>
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>>3538392
>So tempted to end thread here... so tempted...
You're only allowed to end the thread here if you start thread 19 immediately.
>>
>smoochy smoochy

You rise to your feet, unclasping her hands, and sweeping your arms around her in one graceful movement. The very air itself seems to shimmer around her, like a drug-induced hallucination of passion.

"Darling..." you murmur, gazing deep into the filled eyesockets of her beautifully-shaped skull.

"S-sweetheart~!" She presses herself against you, like someone pressing a buttered slice of bread down on a ham-and-cheese-topped bread-slice to complete a sandwich. A sandwich... of love.

Your face lowers as hers rises, lips parting...

"ZYAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" A door slams open - the pair of you jump, your face turning to see the man stepping out onto deck IT'S THE FAT DUDE DAMMIT

WHY IS HE HERE

WHY

"Nothing personal, kid!" He grins at you, not nicely, cracking his knuckles as he does. "When you yelled about goin' to the docks, I thought I'd get ahead of ya. Good thing I thought I'd go eat some pie while waiting for ya, huh? Who'd have thought you'd steal this ship!"

DAAAAMMMITTTTTTT

You point at him, expression stubborn. "I'm not going to Whitebeard! I refuse!"

"Nah, I'm just gonna kill ya."

.... Oh.

Wait. What?
__________________________

THE END! OR IS IT...?!

>>3538416
I need to be up early tomorrow for LUN-DUN so nooooooooo~
>>
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>>3538476
>so nooooooooo~
Wow. Okay. Well now you've made me sad. I hope you're happy!
>>
>>3538476
MOTHERFUCKING BLACKBEARD.
>>
>>3538476
Oh goddamnit

Another reason to kill Blackbeard
>>
D-did Blackbeard just "pshhh nothin personell" our romantic moment?
>>
>>3538487
Yes. And that's why he dies.
>>
Thanks to everyone who joined the exciting adventures of Stefan (and his hangers-on, I guess). No doubt you are all in awe of my brilliance in writing romance, and blown away by the excellent characterisation and tender passion of this totally realistic relationship between the cabin boy and some random woman I originally threw together as your antagonist.

Poor papaSmo is going to wake up, go smash down the door to Klaus' storage room, steal all his booze and get incredibly drunk now.

>>3538487
If I could have made him appear behind you with a sword, I'd have gladly done it.
>>
>>3538493
>and get incredibly drunk now.
Good, that'll dampen the blow when Flashy shows up with Lightning Logia powers!
>>
Rolled 71 (1d100)

Aaaaalso, next thread idk when, due to London. Could be tomorrow! Could be Thursday! Could be Friday! All I know is that it'll be shocking (due to electricity), and Mr Speedy will be there to welcome you back to consciousness. Along with a giant snek.

For now, rolling for Phantom-trauma.


Also, any questions re. Silvers-verse or regular-versd?
>>
>>3538516
Thanks for running QM, your quests are really the best one I've seen in a very long time and the humor is top notch as always.
>>
>>3538516
Thanks for running! Holy hell the entire final part was comedy gold, my sides still hurt from laughing.

>Questions
Yeah are Ace and Garp actually dead in regular-verse? Since it's probably gonna be a bazillion more threads before we're off Skypeia and meet up with anyone who knows their situation.
>>
>>3538516
Which one is dumber? Canon-Flash or Silvers-Flash?
>>
>>3538516
Roughly how mad is Akainu?
>>
>>3538522
>>3538524
Ayyyyyy, thanks anons! My word-vomit is an incessant source of concern, so it's good to know some people like the taste. ... Wait.

>>3538524
>Abs and Fist
SPOOOOOILER ALEEEEEERTT but seriously, I've just been enjoying fucking with you all, they're alive. Fireplace is seriously injured though, and Garp is fuuuurious.

>>3538527
Yes.
Honestly, it's Silvers. While Smoker logically knows Flashy isn't TOTALLY stupid, his subconscious dream-world is happy to exaggerate matters.

>>3538533
Imagine papaSmo. Now imagine that Flashy has told him he's running off to be a pirate, and also that the World Government has just declared smoking illegal.
It's a bit like that.


Also, apologies for ridiculous similies and such, I seriously can't write romance, so I end up going in the other direction. Oh well. I blame all of you guys.
>>
>>3538562
>Also, apologies for ridiculous similies and such, I seriously can't write romance, so I end up going in the other direction. Oh well. I blame all of you guys.
It's okay, I'm gonna steal those anyways.
>>
>>3538562
>I seriously can't write romance
The popularity and existence of our waifu beg to differ. I look forward to the waifu of mainQuest you'll introduce in thread 45 or something.
>>
>>3538562
So a couple of new islands just appeared next to Marineford. Got it.
>>
>>3538586
>waifu
>mainQuest
anon, we've been over this
the only waifus for flashy are JUSTICE and WEAPONS
>>
>>3538562
The romance is perfectly goofy in an endearing sort of One Piece way. Silvers quest is just as much fun as Flashman. You keep writing your magic BP, this quest is a blast.

How much Zoro trauma have we inflicted in main quest though? You know, being a victim of gravity and all.
>>
>>3538588
Which is why our waifu shall be a Ninja Lawyer. A LIVING JUSTICE WEAPON.
>>
>>3538586
>Main quest Waifu
>It's still Masayoshi
>Absolutely no changes
My sides would completely leave orbit.
>>
>>3538580
Too late, I'm making Valentine's cards with them.

>>3538592
>zoro trauma
OH BOY. I'll leave that as a surprise. Let's just say he's not very happy.

>>3538596
... There's actually going to be a female ninja coming up eventually, and I've just now realised someone's probably going to waifu her. DAMMIT. Maybe I'll make her a guy.
>>
>>3538603
>Even comes with a free Blackbeard encounter when we're about to kiss her
Okay now I'm starting to warm a bit to Flashy getting a waifu.
A BIT.
>>
>>3538562
>Imagine papaSmo. Now imagine that Flashy has told him he's running off to be a pirate, and also that the World Government has just declared smoking illegal.
Ah, so one part 'my idiotic child is up to its armpits in trouble because of its own stupidity, AGAIN!' and one part 'is the universe itself screwing with me?'.
In other words, disappointed in his kid choices, annoyed he has to play rescue, majorly pissed at how bullshit the whole situation is, but in the end its business as usual, disregard weird, do what has to be done.
Thats just papaSmo tho, Akainu has different work ethic.
>>
>>3538608
>Maybe I'll make her a guy
Its 2019 it will not stop us.
>>
>>3538608
>Back in main Flashman quest
>Flashy wakes up
>Zoro is ugly crying over his not dead body
>Zoro threatens to kill him if he doesnt wake up
>Run like the wind Harry, your life depends on it
>Queue yakity sax chase
Rivals 4lyfe
>>
>>3538608
>DAMMIT. Maybe I'll make her a guy.
It's too late for that now! The ninja will forever henceforth be female!
>>
>>3538608
Qm the only true love is for wonder and andventure.
Wait.
Wonder, adventure and shenanigans.

>Banning cigars
Silly QM, that way Smoker would join Flashman as a pirate!

Btw I almost died of laughter today, don't belittle your cracky-rom-fu. It was some of the most idiotic dialogue I have ever read.
And since it was planned as such, you can take it as a compliment!
>>
>>3538628
>wake up in a cabin on the Merry
>chained with seastone
>all your weapons gone except the swords
>zoro's there, grinning maniacally, eyes dead and empty
>it's now stephen king's Misery, but with swords instead of writing and a crazy rival instead of a crazy fan
Perfect... batshit-insane, obsessed Zoro who thinks you're going to die or stop using swords if he lets you go. I love it.
>>
>>3538688
...
Wouldn't hitting us with swords be exactly the kind of danger we should avoid?
>>
>>3538695
Why?

Swords are good. Swords are your friends. You can trust swords. Love them. As they love you.

Not like that bitch, gravity.

(Going to bed now, any further replies will be in the morning. Night all, thanks for playing! Especially the nat1 anon.)
>>
>>3538476
Absolute ace of a cliffhanger. It's so wonderfully cheesy! But I'm glad we're getting a break. Or, leaving a break... whichever.
>>
I can just imagine Smoboss waking up like this
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cEITn7-Gafc
>>
>>3520516
Hey guys, new reader here. Just finished reading the entire archive, and i gotta say i love this quest.
One question though. How are you gonna tell captain smoker that you went to heaven as an undercover pirate, killed god in single combat atop a burning sky-ship made of solid gold and then stole god's power on accident?
>>
>>3541090
we don't. claim amnesia or something.
>>
>>3541090
"I got drunk around Pirates again"
>>
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>>3541090
We'll tell him we went to heaven as an undercover pirate, killed god in single combat atop a burning sky-ship made of solid gold and then stole god's power on accident, what else do we have to say?
>>
>>3541154
Voting for this.
>>
>>3541154
>My undercover mission to get information was a complete success
>>
>>3541090
“look papa i have brought u an grandchild it is snek”

“What the fuck.”
>>
>>3541090
That we tried really, really hard to be a non-combatant and stay safe, like he wanted.
And then show him scrapbook-chan.
>>
Seriously, smoboss is gonna... god, i don't even know.
Since we left him, we got bellamy and his entire group killed, photographed all of the straw hats (except usopp), acquired what is basically a magic shapeshifting sword that's literally perfect for flashman the walking armoury, and killed a mass murdering god, stealing his powers to become Flashman: God of Thunder

Seriously, the flashman name is a double entendre now. Because Photographer, but also Lightning God.
Even if we didn't go on a weeks-long fucking adventure to golden sky-heaven and ONLY ate the gorofruit, still! How the fuck would smoker react to flashman eating a logia?! A LIGHTNING logia at that?!

>Flashman just falls from the sky, smashing a hole through two of the ships' decks before coming to a stop
>Smoker rushes downstairs to check on the disturbance
>Flashman stands there unsteadily, thinly veiled by a haze of smoke
>As the smoke clears, his dragon tattoo is revealed through his tattered coat
>it's sparkling even more brilliantly than usual due to the electricity dancing around his body
>He's wielding new and exotic-looking weapons and his pockets are stuffed full of gold jewelry
>...I got drunk again, smoboss. Sorry about that.
>WHERE THE FUCK?! WHAT THE FUCK?! HOW?! LITERALLY FUCKING HOW?!?! -Smoker
>...I made a scrapbook. ...Can you teach me to fly with logia powers?
>smoker opens a nearby crate, pulls out a massive brick of cigars and shoves the entire thing into his mouth, huffing on them furiously as he tries to light them all
>>
>>3541616
The shapeshifting sword doesn't work outside of Skypeia
>>
>>3541620
It should, shouldn't it? The cloud one just stores and expels clouds, and this ultra-rare iron one does pretty much the same, doesn't it?

Is it written somewhere that they won't work with previously-stored clouds outside of skypea, or did you just mistake BPQM saying that as literally true, because you wouldn't be able to get any clouds once you left?

I don't really remember the specifics of the dials or skypea clouds, so you may well be right.
>>
>>3541629
It's a weird thing with all cloud dials, they can store them and they work fine in Skypeia, but once you get to the Blues, they dissipate outside the dial.
>>
>>3541629
IIRC in-universe It's something to do with atmospheric pressure or some shit
>>
>>3541629
Yeah, cloud dials canonically don't work outside the Sky Islands. I think they emit clouds but they aren't solid enough to walk on/stab people with. You can probably trade it for something cool before you leave, though, seeing as the Skypiea shops are still non-obliterated.

Also, you've been gone about a weekish, and about 2-3 days since you left Ta-sis and Curly.

Seasus Crab.
>>
>>3541672
Let harry run free for literally just one week and he runs off and kills god, eating his heart to gain his powers.
What an absolute unit, there's no stopping this madman.
His theme song is "Rules of Nature" and i will now be playing it every time he fights.
>>
>>3541700
I claim it's Fierce Battle from Nocturne: fits more with what you said.
>>
>>3541672
Hey, remember that time someone talked about throwing cannonballs and then jumping into them with our lightning logia powers, then you joked about how you couldn't give us the fruit because it's too amazing and powerful?

I remember that.
We could ride cannonballs now, you know. Throw the cannonball, jump inside, ride to wherever it lands and throw again.
We could also supercharge the cannonball with every ounce of our logia powers, creating a literal thunder cannon attack.
We could also coat that cannonball in armament, because we'd be literally inside it. And also in mostly-untouchable logia form.

Cannonballs.
Lightning Logia.
Flashman.

he's going to disown us when we start using cannonballs as our main attack, isn't he?
>>
>>3541717
Also, we need an extremely accurate, high-velocity, high-powered, long-distance cannon on smoker's ship so he can literally fire us into the enemy, or anywhere else we need to go.
>>
>>3541720
Also, did i mention that there's potential for us to have a railgun-styled attack using ball bearings?
They're basically miniature cannonballs. Or just steel bullets instead of lead ones.

And we could carry a lot of them in an ammo pouch.
And still use them with our pistol.

Or what about a move i like to call "The Heartstopper" where harry builds up a massive capacitive charge in his body, then releases it all at once by pressing his hands directly against the enemy's chest, or in a pinch by touching their sword?
There's potential to literally make their heart explode.
https://youtu.be/coW1RHUsf_I?t=134
>>
>>3541717
oh no

>>3541720
He will fire you to the bottom of the goddamn sea and consider it a job well done.
>>
>>3541737
>oh no
Hey, hey. Railgun?
Weaponized Finger Guns.
>>
>>3541748
You have my full attention.
>>
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>>3541752
>flashman sees a group of filthy pirate
>dispensejustice.exe has been activated
>he calls out to them, waving for attention with a big grin on his face
>they turn to look
>harry pulls a 5 berry coin from his pocket and flicks it into the air
>the filthy pirates don't see a ranged weapon, they don't understand the danger they're in
>harry's grin grow wider as he shoots them a top-class finger gun and clicks his tongue at them twice
>the coin fall in front of his finger, suddenly launching itself not at BULLETS speed, but at the speed of JUSTICE
>the pirate leader's top half turns into a splatter of blood and gore, blinding his companions as they scream in horror and confusion
>it's too late to run, harry has already tossed an oddly shiny and well-maintained looking cannonball painted with a seagull crest up to their location
>appearing from within, harry pats the cannonball lovingly before tucking it back into his pocket
>he then proceeds to electrocute the remaining terrified and confused pirates through the pool of their captain's blood
>harry returns home in time for dinner, via cannonball
>>
>>3541770
Status of QM: crying at what I've unleashed
Status of Doflamingo and Big Mom: urge to acquire you intensifying
Status of Zoro: THOSE AREN'T SWORDS DAMMIT
>>
>>3541784
>Zoro
Fine, we'll use railgun swords. What now Mosshead?
>Status of Zoro: Conflicted

Alternatively
B E A M S A B E R
>Be Flashman
>Zoro challenges you to yet another duel
>Pull out an empty katana hilt
>Zoro: Alright, haha, where's the sword. And dont you dare chuck it at me.
>Channel lightning into the hilt and make a katana via One Piece Devil Magic. Dont ask how, just beam saber.
Depending on how we use the fruit too, we could try to use lightning to make everything a sword.
>>
>>3541798
Anon, don't be silly.
Why would we use an empty handle for our beam sword when ALL of our swords can be beam swords?
Meaning cut-chan, ka-tan and even jitte-san?
Hell, we could even apply lightning to pistol-chan's bullets, or even turn pistol-chan herself into the railgun and fire her without gunpowder at speeds that gunpowder literally cannot reach!
>>
>>3541804
And don't forget the best part about them being beam swords.
We can electrocute the shit out of anyone who crosses blades with us, piss easy.

Literally do not get within melee range of flashman, he will fucking destroy you.
>>
>>3541804
>just hold lightning bolts in your hands because one piece is bullshit
>somehow stab people with them
>zoro is confused over SWORD/NOT-SWORD
>mihawk considers you a bad influence and tells zoro he can't play with you any more
>>
>>3541808
>Melee range
You sure you dont mean "Flashman Range"? After all, we are become Lightning, destroyer of Mook.

>>3541810
Well Mihawk is a fuddy dudd who needs to get with the times. The future is now Sword Uncle 3.
>>
>>3541810
I super duper can't wait for the next thread, i really want more and i'm excited to finally have a third qm that i now follow
When is that, by the way?
>>
>>3541810
I wonder about one thing. In canon Smoboss was thinking Strawhats were going to Raijin Island. What do you think would happen if we ever go there?
>>
Rolled 76 (1d100)

>>3541824
T O M O R R OW

Prooooobably around 3pm Britbong time. I'm aiming for 2pm, but let's face it, I'm never on time. And thank you, I hope everyone is enjoying the adventures of Mr Speedy. And his sidekick Brightboy, or whatever his name is.

Rolling for how much of the forest Mr Speedy ate while you were unconscious.
>>
>>3541835
Holy shit, 76%?
He must be the size of the zoa elephant by now...
>>
>>3541835
When we get back, we need to make sure tashigi doesn't give those swords to anyone.
We're supposed to take care of them. It's a man's promise, and a man's promise is a man's romance.
>>
>>3541834
I'll cry. A lot.
Do you want to make me cry? Do you?! (Don't say yes.)

>>3541841
Mr Speedy becomes Mr Steed-y...

>>3541859
I don't think you actually promised anything, Zoro just assumes you still have them. Which you don't. WAT DO?!

Also guys, I dunno about Ennies Lobby, but you won't be doing Water 7 unless you screw up all my plans again. As much as I'd love to find a way for you to recruit Paulie, you've got other stuff to do after you leave Skypiea. You WILL have time to trade/buy stuff as well.

Next (mini-)arc after Skypiea can be either with Smoboss and crew, or with just a couple of people (choice of Tashigi, Fop, Klaus, Hat&Sunglasses, etc). Pinky and Chin may or may not be there as well, depending what you guys want.
>>
>>3541865
am fien with missing Water 7, I jsut really want us to be there for the Ohara exposition, it's too good a moment for Flashy to start seeing the cracks in the facade of justice that the WG puts forth, luckily with our fruit augmented observation we can almost certainly hear it as long as we are in Ennies Lobby when it happens
>>
>>3541865
A man's promise is in his heart, it doesn't matter what does or doesn't leave his lips!
From the moment he asked us to care from them, it was set in stone! When he knew we were just joking about throwing them overboard, it was set in steel! When we talked to eachother by the campfire, it was carved into our very soul!

Harry understands the importance of one's swords, it would be nothing less than scummy to just let them go, especially after what he told us about wado ichimonji.

Even if we have to throw ourselves at her feet, even if we can't tell her the reason no matter what, we have to ask tashigi to at least give us wado ichimonji for safekeeping, even if only to keep it hidden in our cabin.
>>
>>3541616
>Flashman: God of Thunder
Marines = Sea Cops

Thunder
THUNDER
THUNDER COPS HOOOOOO

>>3541798
>B E A M S A B E R
>In an ocean, far, far away...

>>3541865
>I'll cry. A lot.
>Do you want to make me cry? Do you?! (Don't say yes.)
IMMA DO EET
Yes
>>
>>3541877
>Back on board the White Mist
>Tashigi please let me hold onto Wado
>No way, you'll do something stupid.
>Come on, you dont understand a Man's Romance!
>And I hope I never do. The answer is no Harry.
>Fine. I'll gi- give you dibs the next time we meet Zoro.
>You'll make it the next three times. And you'll do my chores for a week Commander Latrine Duty.
>>
Rolled 37 (1d100)

>>3541865
Let's see what Dice Gods have to say about your plans.
>>
Rolled 32 (1d100)

>>3541894
>Commander Latrine Duty.
Desperate times, desperate measures

We must ask THE GARP to take us on an adventure to escape the curse of the latrine

>>3538476
Rolling for how many grandkids Granpapa Rayleigh is gonna get
>>
Rolled 91 (1d100)

>>3541894
>give tashigi dibs
>zoro ignores her and goes after you
>furioustashigi.png
Rolling for Tashigi unlocking Conqueror's Haki so she can beat the crap out of you.
>>
>>3541903
You forget that she needs a one in a million chance!

#Never4getThose3consecutiveRolls
>>
>>3541903
Oh so close sis but not today
>>
Rolled 86, 12, 70 = 168 (3d100)

>>3541903
Rolling again for Tashigi
>>
>In yet another alternate reality, where Flashman has eaten the Goro Goro no Mi, but is more or less Superman during his electricity phase, and more content actually doing photography rather than getting into trouble
>But it's Flashman, so...

"Oh wow, I don't think I've ever seen a warship soaring through the air before!" :click!: "Man, this shot is going to look so awes--"

"Yes! We finally got the freak!"
"You know captain, he'd probably just leave us alone if we didn't provoke him; why are we even doing this anyway, let alone going through the trouble of launching a warship on top of him?"
"...Uh...shit, I honestly forgo--ohlookadistraction, we'll continue this conversation never...why is the warship moving?"

https://youtu.be/miOizLxOD4E

"Hahaha...okay, that was pretty interesting, but I'm pretty sure dropping a warship on me is cheating. You guys can have it back."

>One yeeted warship at a fleet, and much yelling later

"...Really, Flashman? Really?"
"Aw, c'mon! They started it!"
>>
Food then new thread so probably 4pm Britbong. Yes, I suck. But I give you LIGHTNING.
>>
>>3543729
All hail BP, bringer of lightning
>>
>>3543729
One who gives lightning cannot possibly suck.
Maybe blow. As in, things apart. But not suck.
>>
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>>3541717
>>3541865
>Vote starts, how should Flashman get to that island?
Me: WHEN I SAY RAIL, YOU SAY...
QM: Tear tsunami falls, everyone dies.
Me: Pic related.

Seriously, I'm fine with using that move IN LAND sometimes (for shits and giggles), but we shouldn't abuse an obvious way to fall into the sea. The Goro removes the need to breathe of it's user, so we probably won't drown, but underwater pressure is still there and even if we have armament covering the cannonball, we could lose days, weeks, even months until we are rescued and put into double perma latrine duty (we are alredy in perma latrine duty) and get a "NO CANDY NOR PINK FLAMINGOES UNTIL YOU STOP THE BULLSHIT" order from Smoboss.
Also, make someone reinforce our cannonball with layers of an hyperstrong conductive material and engrave the Marine symbol and JUSTICE (and other cool stuff) into our precious baby.
He/She could be a hardened marine full of tatoos in human form.
>>
>>3543751
And use lightning chains to get all our cannonballs back until they awaken and can move on their own
>>
>>3543754
>magnetically levitating cannonballs, magneto style
https://youtu.be/S7Cozf7D4Wk?t=86
>>
WRITING UPDATE WOOOOOOO

... To the Planets Remix by Mark Griskey, which is totally ill-fitting but very inspiring.

Archiving this thread now, before I forget.
>>
Rolled 5 (1d5)

>>3543768
Stuff.
>>
NEW THREAD
>>3543812



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