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>>3972889
first for the end of the end

HAHA TIME FOR FUCK QUEST!

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>You are Alabaster Soliloquy, NEET and cripple.
Go time.

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Season 2/3/4 Smut Pastebin: https://pastebin.com/u/CeriseSoliloquy (content not allowed on /qst/ will go here)
Season 1 Smut Pastebin: https://pastebin.com/rkSCNTEa

Season 1 Episode Index: https://pastebin.com/u/DirtyCeriseFaggot
Season 2 Episode Index: https://pastebin.com/iDiki7kt
Season 3 Episode Index: https://pastebin.com/FAC5emid
Season 4 Episode Index: https://pastebin.com/0LwgLaHB
Twitter: https://twitter.com/CeriseSoliloquy

---

Episode 1 ("Five Petabytes per Second"): https://archived.moe/qst/thread/3757772

Episode 2 ("Galatea Trick"): https://archived.moe/qst/thread/3775200

Episode 3 ("2MI DA"): https://archived.moe/qst/thread/3787986

Episode 4 ("Fooly Chloe"): https://archived.moe/qst/thread/3818053

Episode 5 ("Jigglypuff"): https://archived.moe/qst/thread/3832845

Episode 6 ("Ghost in the Shell: Little Sister Complex"): https://archived.moe/qst/thread/3845974

Episode 7 ("Bubblegum Crisis"): https://archived.moe/qst/thread/3891623

Episode 8 ("Keki's Delivery Service"): https://archived.moe/qst/thread/3915096

Interlewd 7 ("Fuck x Sis"): https://archived.moe/qst/thread/3915096#p3927685

Episode 9 ("Neon Weeaboo Catachresis"): https://archived.moe/qst/thread/3938754

Episode 10 ("David Darkbloom is a Hero"): https://archived.moe/qst/thread/3957632

---

AND NOW, EPISODE 11 OF THE END OF FUCK QUEST:
"Cool Devices"

>>3972889
t's time for some justice for our boy Alabaster

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July 21, 1969

Dave his friend Billy are out exploring the woods. They're playing moonman: Dave is the brave astronaut sent to explore the ruins of a lost city on the dark side of the moon, and Billy is the alien king who wants to kill him. Even out here in Middle of Nowhere, Tennessee, the first lunar landing has electrified everyone, old and young. It's all anyone's talking about.

But the game is winding down now as the sun dips lower in the sky. Both are due back for supper, and neither wants to get their hide tanned. They trudge back through the bramble together, tromping over stumps and stumping over roots. Through the branches overhead, the moon is already visible in the bright sky. Dave pauses to gaze up at it, and Billy stops a few paces on.

"I wanna go there too," Dave says. "For real."

Billy laughs. "Quit playin. We ain't gonna get there for real."

"Why?"

"'Cause it ain't for us, that's why," is Billy's answer: resigned already at the age of seven to a life as his father and his father's father and his father's father's father lived.

"Ya ever hear the word podunk?" Dave asks, when finally he tears his eyes off the moon.

"Yeah. How come?"

"Apparently we're podunk. But that don't mean we gotta be podunk forever, right?"

Billy giggles. "Apparently. Hahaha." He pantomimes holding a teacup, pinky out. "Apparently we're podunk. Apparently. Apparently."

Dave blushes hard.

"Get over yerself, Davey. We gotta be home soon."

"I'll be catchin up," Dave says. He sits at the base of a nearby tree, sullen, and embarrassed. Idly his hands fiddle with a flower in the soil between his legs.

But Billy is like a shark smelling chummed waters, and approaches. "Hey, Mr. Flowerboy. Whatcha got there?" He knows that Dave likes to collect bugs and flowers, and identify them -- one of many brainy activities that make him stick out like a sore thumb.

Dave shrugs.

"Hahaha," Billy laughs. "Gonna put that one in yer diary too?"

"It's not a diary," Dave snaps. "It's a journal -- for specimens."

"Specimens," Billy snorts. "Apparently you got yerself a new specimen."

Dave plucks the flower. Then he's on his feet. "I do! And it's a rare one, too. I got smarts, Billy. I ain't ashamed of it. That's how I'm gonna get outta bein podunk. 10 or 20 years from now I'll be on the moon while you're down in a mine, and we'll see who laughs then!"

Billy grimaces. "You a little fancy boy, Davey? Everyone says yer a pissant. This is why. You think you're better'n us? You ain't! Just 'cause you can read a dicti'nary! Well so what!"

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>>3972889
>WWSD

What would Stackleford do?

>>3972909
Ohhh man.

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Dave shoves him in anger. Billy raises a hand to punch back. Dave intercepts the fist, but Billy kicks him in the shin instead. They get into a tussle, a real tussle, not the play tussling of the moonman game. And as they roll around on the ground, Dave passes through a wildberry bush, scratching his skin all over on the thorns and bristles. Then directly on the other side, he goes tumbling over a sheer drop, some 6 or 7 feet. He hits the earth again at a galloping roll, and careens head over ankle down a steep slope, into a little vale.

"Davey!" Billy hollers from the rim of the vale. "You okay?"

"I'm okay," Dave calls back, trying to fight his way standing again. He's bruised all over, dirty and concussed. His hide's getting tanned for sure tonight.

A terrible stench fills his nostrils. As he stands, he surveys where he's found himself.

Last winter was unusually long and frigid. Early in May, despite the spring finally having bloomed, there was cold snap that iced things over for a few days. A whole herd of does and fawns hunkered in this vale to huddle and preserve warmth -- but the steep slopes covered with hoarfrost, and insulated from thawing by natural shading, prevented the deer from being able to get back out again, and they died. So what Dave finds in the bowl of the vale is the grisly sight of hundreds of half-putrified, flyblown deer carcasses lying in the tall grass. It's a hideous mass grave. The air is thick with buzzing insects and the whole ground undulates with their young. Millions upon billions of maggots, as far as the eye can see, feasting on rotted deer viscera, and Dave is ankle deep in them. Having fallen among them, he glances down at himself in horror to find that they're writhing around on him, too. He swipes at his shirt and pants, to fling them off, doing a panicked little dance. He feels, with growing nausea, the sensation of the larvae getting lodged inside his shoes and smashed by his feet and toes. He screams, high and shrill, scrambles to climb back out of the vale. Billy, laughing at his friend's predicament, helps him up and out. Calls him a girl for being grossed out by a couple of the bugs he so loves to collect. Helps him swipe the things off his body and shake them loose from his boots.

Dave realizes then that only he can get himself to where he wants to go -- which is far, far away from here. And far from the specter of death, too, like the death which befell those countless innocent does and their issue.

In all the tumult and panic of the moment, Dave dropped the flower specimen he had collected, among the dead deer. It was a Camellia, a brilliant amber-colored one. A cultivar found, in the wild, only in southeast Asia. How it ended up in Appalachia is anyone's guess, and Dave never finds another like it in the woods ever again.

SEASON 4 OP: https://vimeo.com/354421891
SEASON 4 OP (Creditless): https://vimeo.com/354421989

>>3972909
>Young David looked like Shinji

That's incredibly obvious in retrospect

>>3972917
aaaaaAAAAAAA

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>>3972909
>>3972917
Stop. He's already dead.

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>>3972917
You really know how to make a guy feel repulsed, OP

>>3972917
This is easily the most gut-wrenching thing you've ever written.

>>3972918
It makes me wonder, since Dalton didn't wear glasses, if Darkbloom ever caught himself trying to adjust a pair that wasn't there.

>>3972909
>>3972917
Ohhh man

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"3, 2 -- okay we're rolling. Thanks for being here."

Cerise sits across from a certain notable podcast host in his cozy little recording studio. She leans into the felt-covered mic.

"Thanks. I'm glad to be here."

"I guess I can't call you congresswoman yet. What's the right word? Congresswoman-elect?"

"That's fine. I think that's fine."

"Congresswoman-elect Cerise Soliloquy."

"Sure."

"Do you find that things have changed now that you're in politics? Like do you get people stopping you on the street, 'why haven't you fixed things yet!' -- like that?"

"No--" Cerise says. "Not really, no. Not yet, anyway. When they swear me in next week I guess that might be different."

"Right. Voters are really demanding. You have to watch out." He grins in his open-mouthed way. "I wanna switch this up for a second. We can come back to the issues. I'm sure you want to talk about the issues too."

"Not really."

"Well I just want to ask a few things I never see you get asked by mainstream outlets. Okay, this stuff is super interesting."

"Oh, sure."

"Traps."

"Love 'em."

The host laughs. "Next question!"

Cerise is laughing, too. "But really."

"Yeah, really, though. You have to, like, enlighten me here. This is a debate that's been raging on the internet since... about as long as I've been aware of it." He turns in his seat. "Do you know what we're talking about, Jamie? ... He won't say. He doesn't want to admit he knows." He glances back to Cerise. "I'm gonna get, like, hate mail for this because it's a slur now. Even though -- even though I see people who self-ID that way."

"Oh, yeah. Some people hate it. I've gotten a lot of people responding to me the same way."

"Not woke enough."

"Not nearly."

The host scratches his nose. "But we're not talking about the real life equivalent. These are fictional people here. Japanese animes of boys who dress like girls. Traps. You know, like, cartoon crossdressing."

"Yeah, basically," Cerise agrees. "You've got the idea. Been doing a lot of research?"

"Only, and here's the part that's so unfair. It's so unfair. It's not like crossdressing in real life. In real life, nine times out of ten, you can tell. You can be like -- okay, yeah, that's a dude. In an anime though, that's impossible to see. Okay? What these anime artists do is they're just drawing a woman and then putting a weenie on at the end --" Cerise snorts at that. "I don't mean to be so direct. But that's what it is, right?"

"A lot of the time," Cerise says. "But there's a whole gradient -- you know, of how feminine they are --"

"Sure, sure." He bobs his head up and down. "Oh man. I'm gonna get so much hate mail."

"Your Twitter's blowing up already, I'm sure."

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>>3972933
Oh my god, yes.

>>3972933
It's time, freak bitches.

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"But now the debate is -- is it gay? To be into a drawing of a girl that happens to have a weenie. That's the question on everyone's mind. This is true. This is older than anything else on the internet. Are traps gay?"

"100% gay," Cerise says. Then diplomatically adds: "In my opinion."

"I agree," the host says. "This isn't even a transsexual thing, right."

"Right."

"This isn't even a person born biologically as a man who wants to identify as a chick or anything like that. This is just a guy who gets sexual kicks from dressing like one. So if you're into that, if you're like, sexually attracted to that, that makes you gay. Has to. It has to."

"But that depends, doesn't it?" Cerise says.

The host points at her, becoming animated. "Right! So here's the thing. This debate goes back and forth all the damn time, but always it's guys having the debate. It's dudes online arguing about hentai like, I'm not gay. You're gay. You like boys in dresses, huh huh huh."

"It's gay, though," Cerise says. "That's what makes it cute. In my opinion."

"For a guy," the host says. "But now, you're a chick. So I'm gonna put it to you: is it gay, for a chick to be into traps?"

Cerise smiles. "Probably not. But maybe. But -- maybe not. It's complicated."

"It's super complicated." He pauses, wrists together, swiveling a little this way and that in the chair. "I guess... are you into the boyness of the trap, or the girlness of the trap?"

"Why not both?" Cerise asks. "What makes it sexy -- to me -- is you've got this almost but not quite masculine body -- androgynous, really -- dressing up in sexy clothes that almost but not quite can convince you he's a girl. But you treat him like a girl. With a little surprise in there."

The host leans way into his mic and whispers softly: "I'm very uncomfortable with this conversation."

"You started it."

He leans back and picks up the volume again. "But now you're a congressional candidate -- actually scratch that, an elected representative. Congrats."

"Thank you."

"And you're tweeting out these incredibly racy, basically hentai drawings of boys in dresses, like, all the time. Do you ever worry about how that makes you look? Like people are gonna be, oh, here's that sex freak Cerise Soliloquy, I don't want her representing me in Washington."

"I don't think people care," Cerise says. "Not in my district anyway. Maybe in eastern Tennessee or something. But not here. Everyone has their things that they're into -- what matters is if I can do a good job representing them on important political issues. I won, didn't I? No one voted for me thinking I'm a Catholic nun."

"You've tweeted out a few drawings of guys crossdressing as nuns, I'm pretty sure."

"Even so," Cerise laughs.

>>3972942
>>3972933

>She won.
oh fucking shit I'm slow

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"Worry. Worry. Achoo."

"This is fucked up. This is too fucked up. I need therapy after this."

Cerise uses a handheld device with pushbuttons on it to control the surgically modified furby, whose skin lies peeled-off in front of it on the table, revealing the hard black plastic casing beneath, with only the thing's beak and eyes and eyelashes still attached. The camera focuses in on it. It's a demonstration the host asked for, but now he clearly regrets it.

"I -- am -- in -- pain. Achoo."

"Oh my god," the host says. "Put this thing of its misery. What the fuck."

Cerise turns it off.

"I want this banned," the host says. "I'm gonna need you to pass a law that says no one can do this, ever again."

"I'll think about it," Cerise says.

>>3972945
That's okay, it took me three weeks to realize what a #bicon was.
I'm also not 100% sure who this guy is.

>>3972942
>Maybe in eastern Tennessee or someting
Hehe...

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>>3972942
From head of a degenerate anime club to congresswoman-elect. I'm so proud of our precious NEET

>>3972952
>he doesn't recognize Joe Rogan
Ohhh man.

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"I'm gonna ask the big question now."

"Okay," Cerise says.

"Are you Galatea?"

"No."

"People say it a lot. A lot of conspiracies going around about that."

"People say a lot of dumb shit. People say the Earth is flat. People say the moon landing was faked. I'm not Galatea."

"Do you know Galatea?"

"No--"

"Is she your wife?"

"You've been reading *Chan way too much. People who never even met me think they've got my whole life story figured out. It's bullshit."

"*Chan -- you know, I avoid *Chan like the plague, because it's such a fucked-up space -- but I did do some research there for this episode. You've got quite the following."

She shakes her head. "It's so gross. I don't know why they're so fixated on me. But I wish they'd stop."

>>3972956
Oh good, he's the only one I could think of that might fit.

>>3972958
I wonder what /csg/ made of this interview.

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"They're -- for those of you who don't know -- it's this web forum for, like, incels with a foot fetish. Mostly foot fetishes. And they decided that Cerise is some sort of goddess, basically... it's kinda like E-stalking, right?"

"They talk about me 24/7. /csg/. They've got pictures of me that I didn't even know existed, videos -- they write fanfic and argue about who loves me the most. Yeah, it's stalking. Stalking mixed with a cult and some sexual fetishes thrown in."

"Super weird and fucked-up."

"I've just been waiting for one of them to crawl through my window or something and stab me in my sleep. It's gonna happen."

"Right? But I've got a theory. Of how to get them off your case."

"Okay."

"If you show them your feet -- just once, like hi-def, 1080p, real close up--"

"Oh my GOD."

"No, no. Hear me out. 80% of these losers are fantasizing about your feet. It's like how if you're afraid of heights, the best thing is to expose yourself to it and, like -- desensitize yourself. Right? You have to desensitize them to your feet." He pantomimes jacking off: "Let them skeet over a high quality close-up of your feet. Then once they skeet, they'll have that post-nut clarity, you know? Like -- oh man. I'm wasting my life on this website."

"I don't buy it. It'll just encourage them more."

"How can they be more encouraged than a 24/7 chat dedicated to masturbating over you? They're at essentially max encouragement right now, I'd argue. The last post I saw there was 2,304 words -- we counted them -- 2,304 words about using a feather to tickle your naked body. It does not get more encouraged than that."

Cerise sighs. He's got a point, unbelievably enough.

A few moments later, she's slipping out of her flats, and propping her pantyhose-clad feet up on the table.

"Let's get a zoom on that," the host says. "Aw yeah. There's the money shot, right there. Wiggle your toes -- oh hell yeah."

"This is so gross," Cerise complains from off-frame. She turns her feet this way and that, and wiggles her toes as instructed. The camera shows everything in all its glory.

"Okay. That should do it." Back to the host's ugly mug: "You just killed a few hundred people with orgasm poisoning. I hope you realize that."

"Good."

>>3972967
jesus fucking christ

>>3972962
A few of them mortified that Cerise thinks so low of them, the rest posting even more degenerate shit than usual and yelling "NOTICE ME, CERISE". And ThatCeriseGuy continuing his tirade of telling people she's an unforgivable whore.

>>3972967
>She actually did it
Fuckin hell

>>3972967
WE GOT IT BOYS

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He laughs. "So if nothing else -- it'll keep them busy. Right?" He rubs his nose. "Do you have a favorite poster there?"

"No. God, no."

"I don't mean one you actually like -- let's be clear here. I mean how you might have a favorite freak at the freakshow. One of the chimps whose shit-throwing amuses you maybe a little more than the others."

Cerise thinks, silent for a turn. "Well there's the guy who wants me turn him into a couch."

"Couch guy!"

"Couch anon. I think he's got schizophrenia or something."

"We saw him in those threads too. Always with these long, crazy-involved screeds. Jamie, pull that up. Here we go." The host reads aloud: "A permanent human meatcouch, magically transformed meat-furniture for Cerise's personal use... She rubs her sweaty, bare butt on your magic transformed, leather couch-body... yeah, this has schizoid written all over it."

"If it weren't about me, I'd laugh at it. It's so weird that it loops back around into being kinda funny. But since it's about me, it makes me... ugh." She purrs in disgust. "The worst part is that there isn't really anything we can do to desensitize someone to that. I can show people my feet but I can't turn them into couches."

"I dunno. Do you have a magic wand? I'd totally let you transform me into a couch if it'll get this guy to stop posting. I'll take one for the team."

"The only person I've ever used as a couch is my little brother," Cerise says.

The host is briefly silent, taken back, open-mouthed.

"Oh, come on. You know what I mean."

"I'm... not sure I do, Cerise."

"Let's just move on."

"Might be for the best."

>>3972977
OOH NOOO OP NOOO

>>3972977
Ohhhh man Oh god oh fuck oh geez I'm fucking dying over here

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>>3972977
Couchanon finally ascends as the king of /csg/

>>3972967
Joe is definitely a /csg/ agent in disguise

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"I wanna get your wife in here. She's outside, right?"

"Don't ask her the Galatea thing."

"No."

"No. She's a really shy person."

"Sure. I wanna ask her something much more important than that."

"What?"

"Vaping."

"Oh my god."

"She's heavy into vaping - so I've heard. I want her to teach me her ways."

---

Soon the little recording studio is swimming a cloud of sweet-smelling vapor.

"You can put CBD oil in these, right?" The host asks. He puts the pen to his lips and inhales.

"yes"

"Do you ever do that?"

Gal is mum.

"It's legal in this state, you can answer."

"sometimes"

"Can I be honest here?" He asks.

"ok"

"I don't see the appeal. I'm trying. But I have to side with Cerise on this one."

"Thank you," Cerise says.

"Now if you get some CBD in here, some nootropics, psychadelics -- is there such a thing as vaping mushrooms?"

"i've never heard of that" Gal says.

"You should get on that. Pioneer that shit. You'll graduate from billionaire to trillionaire."

"we'll think about it"

"If you're gonna smoke," Cerise says, "it shouldn't taste like candy. It's absurd." She waves her hand back and forth to dissipate the vapor cloud.

"But it's better for you," the host says.

"Is it, though?" Cerise asks.

"studies have shown--" Gal begins.

"Now you've got her going," the host says.

"--studies have shown that it's much less impactful on health than just about any other form of smoking"

"What studies?" Cerise demands. "You always say -- studies show. Studies show. What fucking studies."

"Trouble in paradise," the host whispers into his mic.

Gal takes rips on her vape and blows the cloud at Cerise. Cerise coughs angrily.

>>3972977
Couch anon must be so happy to be recognized by his goddess

>>3972988
Armstrong is pulling his hair out somewhere.

>>3972988
And here we go. Are we going to hear suck MY dick on air?

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"Okay, I don't do this super often on the show, but I thought this was topical." The host is pulling out a few bottles of beer and setting them on the table. "You're a beer connoisseur, right, Cerise?"

"Oh hell yeah."

"This is -- can we get a close up?" He holds the beer so the label shows. "Sand Reckoner IPA. This is from 421st Street Brewery here in LA." The label shows a stylized pyramid with an illuminati-style eye in the pinnacle cap, only the eye glows cybernetically red, like HAL 9000 or a Terminator.

"I hate IPAs," Cerise says.

"Oh shit. Really?"

"I like maltier beers."

"I didn't know that. Supposedly this is really good shit, though. You down to drink one?"

Cerise shrugs. "Beer is beer."

He cracks the bottles open, hands Cerise one, and Gal too. They toast, and drink.

"I like it," the host says.

"It's shit," Cerise says. "Bitter and nasty. Definitely an IPA." Despite that, she takes another deep swig. "I hate it."

"Anna?"

"i'm not into beer." Cerise gently takes the bottle from her, and starts drinking from it as well, while Gal resumes vaping.

"It's really floral," the host says, making a face. "Like it's got flowers mixed in it."

"It's kind of overpowering," Cerise says.

"I'm trying to decide yet if I like it," he says.

"You just said you did."

"I'm deciding, though."

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>>3972995
Good lord it just keeps going.

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Tipsy, somewhat high, and getting loose-lipped, Cerise and Gal enter the second hour of the podcast.

"Whitney Darkbloom," the host says. "Is she as dumb as they say?"

"she's so dumb," Gal replies. "but not. smart dumb. the smartest dummy."

"You know, the weird thing is, I get that," the host says.

"yes"

"I've known a lot of smart dudes who are idiots, and a lot of idiots who are the smartest people you'd ever want to know."

"right"

"We love her," Cerise says. "Smart isn't just what you score on an IQ test. And I wouldn't let her design a rocket ship, but she's got her own set of skills."

"How is she handling retirement?" The host asks.

Cerise and Gal share an uncertain look.

"She didn't want to go," Cerise says.

"But she sold the company. To El--"

"No," Cerise says. "That was forced."

"Wow. Elaborate for me here. What do you mean, forced. How was it forced?"

"cerise..." Gal murmurs.

"The US Army came into Darkbloom Analytics a few weeks ago and told us that they were taking things over. That if we didn't let them do it, they'd kill us. It was forced."

The host's mind is getting blown to kingdom come right now. He can hardly find words; he's fidgeting in his chair. "The US Army."

"Yeah."

"Threatened to kill you?"

"Are we live?" Cerise asks.

"Yeah, man. Live to the world right now."

"Good. Good. Yes, they broke into our company and took it over. They want Sand Reckoner all to themselves. And the guy they put at the top -- I won't even say his name, but he's a friend of yours -- he's just their pawn."

"If this is true..." The host says. "This is maybe the biggest scandal in the world right now."

"It is."

"What does the army want with Sand Reckoner? Do you know?"

"I mean, you fuckers talk enough about it on your show." She takes swig of the SR IPA again. "It's mind control voodoo shit -- in your words. It is. That's how they want to use it, anyway. Look, I know you guys didn't exactly like Darkbloom Analytics, back when Whitney owned it -- but you're going to like it a whole hell of a lot less now that the US government has shadow control over it. Whatever the military wants with it is definitely not wholesome. All Whitney wanted to do was run milkshake restaurants and have sex with my little brother. You're gonna miss having someone that simple in control of this tech. Believe me."

"Do you feel like you're in danger?" The host asks. "Telling us this."

"Yes."

"I'll go ahead and say you probably are," he agrees. "This is heavy shit."

>>3972999
Oh fuck there it is.

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>>3972999
Oh dear

>>3972999
A little off the top you say?
Fuck Cerise, what are you even doing..

>>3972999
I can't fucking believe Former Congresswoman-elect Cerise Victoria Soliloquy committed suicide the day before being sworn into office. It's a fucking shame.

>>3972999
Holy fuck

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You watch Jeopardy with Vivian and Dr. Carte in the hospital room.

"Love didn't keep this famous husband-wife recording duo together -- they split in 2014."

"Who is Captain and Tennille," Vivian says offhandedly. Half a second later, a contestant buzzes in with the same answer.

"Shouldn't it be 'who are Captain and Tennille'?" You say.

"No. Captain and Tennille is the name of the band. The band, taken as an entity, is a singular, and conjugates with the verb 'is,' not 'are'. You wouldn't say, 'who are The Beatles', or 'who are The Who' for example."

"Sure you would," you say.

"Specious. Utterly ridiculous--"

"That's how I'd say it," Dr. Carte tells her.

"Do not take his side just because he is injured. That is patronizing. If he is wrong, as he clearly is here, tell him so without reservation."

"He's not wrong, though."

"Ms. Carte has a soft heart," Vivian tells you. She scoops up a spoonful of applesauce, which you reluctantly let her feed you, as she adds: "She cannot bear to tell you harsh truths at the current moment."

"There's only one person here who doesn't want to hear the truth," you say. You push her hand away when she tries to give you another spoonful. "I didn't shatter my jaw. You know that, right? I can eat solid food."

"Open up," she says, and tries again to push the spoon past your lips.

You push it back. "Vivian. I am not eating any more goddamn applesauce. Not another bite. Okay? You've fed me applesauce every single day for three weeks. Every time you're here: applesauce. I don't need applesauce. Go down to the cafeteria and get me a bag of Cheez-its or something."

"Say aaaa."

"God fucking damn-- oof--" She wiggles the spoon past your lips and forces another dollop of cinnamon-tinged applesauce onto your tongue. You glumly swallow.

>>3973024
Now this is the cutest shit

>>3973024
I'm not going to say going gimp was worth it.
But it does have perks. Cute perks.

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>>3973024
>you will never be spoonfed applesauce by Vivian Darkbloom

time to commit not alive I guess

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"When can I go home?" You ask Dr. Carte.

"Soon. I'm going to assist with the operation to replace your patella. You'll be part robot!"

She's way too excited at that prospect.

"Will I... walk again?" You ask.

"Yes," she says. "You won't have full mobility -- you'll never be a runner, or a soccer player -- but you'll have maybe 80-90% of your old range of motion."

"I guess it's better than nothing," you say. "Still, it really--"

Noelle's entrance interrupts you. She stands at the door of your hospital room. "Your sister is an idiot."

"Shut up," you say. Then: "Which one?"

Noelle walks to your bedside and picks up the remote. She flicks over to FNCNN:

"...erupted suddenly after congresswoman-elect Soliloquy's appearance on the show earlier today. The newly elected representative, who has close ties to former Darkbloom Analytics CEO Whitney Darkbloom, accused the US military of ousting Ms. Darkbloom and taking the company over by force -- a story that stands in stark contrast to public claims of a peaceful buyout by private entities. Now, demonstrators have flooded the gates at Darkbloom Analytics, and are demanding to know what if any role the government is playing in the powerful technology known as Sand Reckoner..."

The screen shows throngs of protestors marching, holding signs, and crowding the sealed-off gates of the campus.

"Oh Jesus," Dr. Carte says.

You feel a knot in the pit of your stomach. "Get me back home soon," you say.

>>3973039
How many layers of recursion are we on?

>>3973039
AUGMENTS ARE BACK

FUCK YEAH

let's just ignore all the awful things that are happening right now, yeah?

>>3973042
maybe like four or five my dude

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>>3973039
Time to be close to dead.

>>3973039
>"Soon. I'm going to assist with the operation to replace your patella. You'll be part robot!"
Robo-Alabaster is back baby!

>>3973039
Well, at least Cerise didn't admit to sucking her brother's dick live on stream.

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Rose, in the chair beside you, snorts, and bolts upright. "I'm awake!" She slurs. She rubs her mouth with the back of her palm. "What was that?"

She basically hasn't left that chair in three weeks, and it's starting to drive her a bit batty. Her and you both. But you can hardly complain -- she was able to give you a blood transfusion that kept you stable in the immediate aftermath of your gunshot wound. How she knew not only her own blood type, but yours too -- is a question you won't probe too much.

"I think we are making final preparations for Alabaster's surgery," Vivian tells her. "Perhaps we should excuse ourselves, and take an evening stroll around the hospital grounds, to freshen up, and allow Alabaster some privacy."

"No thanks," Rose says.

Vivian, with almost inhuman strength, forces Rose up and out of the chair and drags her from the room with her. Struggling in vain against the pint-sized loli, Rose looks back over her shoulder and calls: "Don't go under without letting me see you again!"

"Yeah," you say.

"I'll kill you if you do!"

She goes.

"When does Cerise go to Washington?" You ask.

"Next week," Noelle says.

"We have to keep her here -- where she's safe."

"She has to get sworn in," Dr. Carte says. "No avoiding that."

"Fuck congress," you say. "She can resign. She painted a target on her back just now. If she goes to DC, she'll get merked."

"Alabaster might be right," Noelle says. She looks at Dr. Carte. "Are you doing the surgery tonight, then?"

"We can push it up, yeah. It'll be for the best if everyone's back at home as soon as possible."

"Good," Noelle says. "I'm sick of standing guard out there and listening to him bicker all day with his cousin."

"Do I need to say it?" You ask.

"No."

>Who do you want to visit you first when you wake up from surgery? Pick between 1 and 3.

>>3973082
>Alex
>Mom

And should we assume Renee's already going to be there by default?

>>3973082
I'm in danger!
>[x] 3

>>3973082
>Rose2
We haven't seen her in awhile.

>>3973082
>Whitney
>Amber
>Cerise
Just to get a lay of the land.

>>3973091
I'm an actual retard I though this was a mystery numerical choice.

Whitney, Cerise, wherever she is.

>>3973082
oh god it keeps recurring

uh uh uh
>[x] Cerise
>[x] Rose
>[x] Whitney

It's such a cliche choice, but I literally can't picture anything else.

>>3973082
>Mom
>Charlotte
>Whitney

>>3973089
I'll go ahead and make that third vote

>Cerise
Just to secure it

>>3973082
>Mom
>Rose2
>Amber

>>3973082
I'm assuming that considering that she's our wife, Rose is probably going to be around.
>[X] Charlotte
>[X] Cerise
>[X] Whitney

>>3973082
>Cerise
>Vivian
>Kay

Looks like most people voted for 3 visitors, and the leaders are Whitney, Cerise, and Mom. Closing and writing; please wait warmly.

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>>3973137

>>3973082
Cerise
Amber
Rose2

>>3973137
oh fugg, is Whitney going to complete her FQ1 conquests tonight?

>>3973146
Or as Whitney calls it, The Reconkeister.

Because she's taking that ass back.

>>3973146
For some reason that this was potentially a vote for a lewd didn't even cross my mind.

>>3973151
Same, actually.

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>>3973149
Choice.
>>3973151
>>3973154
I figured it was a catch up opportunity myself. I still wonder how mad Whitney will be.

What's your activity tonight, /fq/? Watching some mahou shoujos do mahou shoujo things and Mario Maker streams mostly.

>>3973177
Powering through the end of Prison School.
It's pretty okay, but I don't think I'd watch it a second time.

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"Count backwards from 100 for me," Dr. Carte says, affixing the rubber mask to your face.

"One hundred... ninety-nine... ninety... eight..."

She wheels the gurney towards the OR. Several of your girls follow along with it, but it's Rose who's gripping the siderail up near your head, who leans over you, and who gets your attention as you drift into oblivion: "I love you, Alabaster."

You shake your head dazedly from side to side.

"Ninety... ninety... I... I lo..."

The warm embrace of a drug-induced sleep grips you.

>>3973193
Worry. Achoo. Achoo. Worry.

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You come back to consciousness with a terrible, throbbing, radiating pain in your knee -- but what else is new? "Errgh..." you groan, reaching under the covers, and touching the incision site. It's still tender, and swollen, and you can feel the sutures in the flesh.

"Shh -- shh," comes a voice off to your side. It's your mother, striding over. She wipes your forehead with a cool, damp cloth. The moonlight makes her look even paler than normal. "How do you feel, baby?"

"It hurts," you rasp.

"Ally! You're awake. Mom said you wouldn't be up until morning." Whitney's at the foot of the bed, grinning broadly. She puts her hands on her hips. "Shows what she knows. She doesn't know that you're only the strongest boyfriend in the universe!"

"It went okay, then?" You ask.

"You're alive, aren't you?" Whitney asks. "Of fucking course it went okay. Don't you think Mom knows what she's doing?"

Mom is stroking your face. "I wasn't worried," she says, an obvious lie. "But I am glad you're up. D-don't get shot next time, y-y-you idiot!"

You glance to your left. Curled up in the chair beside you are Rose and Cerise; they slept like a couple of wombats huddling up together. Cerise stirs, and wriggles free of Rose, stretching and yawning. "Alabaster," she says. "Still alive. Color me shocked."

"I could say the same thing," you reply. "What were you thinking?"

She rubs her elbow and averts her gaze. "So you already heard."

"Trust me, she got her spanking already!" Mom says.

This remark gives you pause, but Cerise pushes forward: "It was the heat of the moment. I just... blurted it out. The world had to know."

"You did the right thing," Whitney says. "Even if consequences aren't ever gonna be the same."

"You gotta call off the swearing-in," you tell Cerise.

"Why?"

"It's not safe for you anymore."

"When was it ever?" She asks.

"You don't actually want to be in congress, do you?" You say. "It was just Whitney's dumbass idea."

"Hey!"

Cerise shrugs. "I kinda got used to the idea. Maybe I could do some good."

"Let's talk about it when we're home," Mom says. "Right now we need to focus on keeping your strength up."

"Uh huh..." Whitney says. She crawls into your hospital bed with you, startling you. On hands and knees she trots forward, like a kitten, smiling. "We'll keep your strength up, all right." There's that all too familiar lilt in her voice that sets in whenever she's ready to ditch her spats.

"Whitney..." you stammer. "I'm -- on so many different schedule II narcotics right now -- I'm basically as high as a kite."

"So?" She says. "Doped-up sex is probably super fun."

"Whitney!" Mom sputters.

"That's rape, you know," Cerise says wryly. "Technically speaking."

"So hot," Whitney says. "And you only get this one chance at it, right, Ally?" She starts to rub you through the covers. "C'mon. You've been out of commission for three weeks. Vivian's jizzing strap-on can't keep me satisfied forever..."

You gulp.

(please wait warmlier.)

>>3973206
Three weeks worth of semen... nah, I ain't gonna finish that statement.

>>3973206
o fuck

>>3973206
>"So?" She says. "Doped-up sex is probably super fun."
Whitney Darkbloom is a fucking treasure.

>>3973193
This is adorable

We should implant david in the president.

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>>3973291
Anonymous-dono...

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https://pastebin.com/E7E08nyc

>>3973313
oh boy oh boy

>>3973313
>not even waking up Rose to join in
These three are so greedy. I love it.

>>3973313
This was a good read.

>>3973313
Based Cerise face sitting

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"It's a design Cerise came up with, actually," Renee tells you. "We were going to do this months ago, but then... other events... got in the way."

You sit at the computer in the Nail House's den, while Mommy sucks Daddy's dick on the couch in the living room. Those animals have absolutely no dignity...

Renee glances back their way. She snaps her fingers. "Uh, hello? You two wanna come over here and take part, or what?"

"No," Daddy grunts, running his hands through his loving wife's blonde tresses. Everyone's been jumping his bones 24/7 since he came back from the hospital. So shameless.

"Okay, well," Renee says, turning back towards you. "It'll give us the opportunity to speak with him again, directly, if we want to."

You examine the mess of circuitry and wires on the desktop. Beside it sits the implant where David Darkbloom lives -- switched off, for the time being, ever since the events at the Cantor residence.

You look back up at Cerise. "You built this yourself?"

"Yeah."

"Shit. You're smarter than you look."

She slaps you across the back of your head.

"Ow! Fuck!"

"Show some respect. I'm your older sister."

"Oh yeah," Daddy groans, out in the living room. "You love it, bitch." You roll your eyes.

"What do you think?" Whitney asks you. "Should we wake bio-dad up? I'll refer to you on that one."

"Defer," Vivian says.

"Blah blah," Whitney snaps back.

"If we turn Penelope back on," you point out, "who's to say that the spooks running your company right now won't know it? They could swoop back in and steal it."

"Well we need to do something," Kay says. "I can run interference with Nelson and Armstrong internally -- and Gal externally -- if they've got any way to monitor whether another implant goes active, we can sabotage it."

"They could know right away, though," you say.

"nelson is running the sand reckoner project," Gal says. "he'd be the first to know -- and i'm sure he wouldn't tell anyone before consulting us. we're safe to turn david back on."

"Yeah! Yeah, fuck her!" Daddy's got Charlotte bent over the couch, and Rose is encouraging him to nail her.

"Pipe down in there!" Kay hollers.

"That's what I'm doing!" Daddy hollers back.

Kay huffs. "The way I see it, we've got three options," she says.

"You and your fucking plans A, B, C," you grumble.

"We have three options," Kay repeats. "We turn him back on now, we keep him inactive for now -- or -- we destroy Penelope and be done with it."

[ ] Turn David Darkbloom back on.
[ ] Keep him off.
[ ] Destroy the implant completely.

>>3973345
Is it time for Furby Darkbloom?

>[ ] Turn David Darkbloom back on.

>>3973345
>[x] Turn David Darkbloom back on.
It's time to accelerate.

>>3973345
Option D defer to Vivian the second smartest girl in the universe. It’s her dads conscious after all.

>>3973345
>[ ] Turn David Darkbloom back on.

>>3973345
Well, at least this time, one of those three plans doesn't sound totally retarded. We have multiple layers of protection, we may as well switch on the power line.

Do we really need him back *now* though?

Well, only one thing for it.

>[x] Turn David Darkbloom back on.

>>3973351
>We have multiple layers of protection
This is itself risky.

>>3973345
>[x] Keep him off (for now)

I don't know if there's anything we absolutely need him for right now, and the prospect of government intervention scares me.

>>3973345
>[X] Turn David Darkbloom back on.

Now I'm wondering: with enough tinkering, is it possible to interact with a fully-powered Penelope through Cerise's device?

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>[x] Turn David Darkbloom back on.

"Furbytize the fucker?" Dr. Carte asks Cerise.

"Check," she says.

She begins to gather up the circuit-bent innards of the furby, plus the implant, but Vivian's hand stays her. "Please, no," Vivian says.

"No what?" Cerise asks.

"Putting him in one of your Furby toys would be so... undignified. Is there nothing else we can use?"

"He doesn't have to go in anything, strictly speaking," Cerise says. "I'm just using the voice chip from the Furby to give him something to speak with."

"But he should have some sort of body," Vivian says. "An existence with no body would be awful. A half-life..."

"I'm not letting you put that bastard inside your skull," you tell her. "I'll crush that thing to dust before I let you do it."

"That's not what I'm suggesting," Vivian says. "He doesn't need to go inside a human body -- or even a living body -- but he deserves at least the dignity of some physical form. Something better than a Furby. That's all."

"Then what?" You ask.

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Cerise finishes stitching up the seam on Johann the penguin's back. One of the stuffed toy's eyes glows a steady blue, just barely discernible behind the nearly opaque black of the glass bead.

You wave your hand up and down in front of it. "Hello? Can you see us?"

There's a pause, and then a sound like microphone interference -- a clearing of the throat, in a sense -- before a modulated voice sort of like Stephen Hawking responds: "Yes."

"You're a penguin now," you tell him. "Congrats."

"We have much to discuss," Darkbloom says.

"We are all ears, father," Vivian says.

"We must destroy Darkbloom Analytics," he says.

>>3973361
OH NO NO I HA TE IT NOT JOHANN

>>3973361
>>3973358
... oh my fucking god.

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Gonna call it there for the night. Join me Monday at 10 PM EST for the conclusion.

>>3973361
Fucking kek

>>3973361
Just incredible.

>>3973364
Goodnight OP.

>>3973364
Good night OP.

>>3973364
Sleep tight, OP-sama. See you on the other side.

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>>3973361
Perfect

>>3973364
See ya, OP

>>3973361
What a coincidence, we already know where to set the bombs!

>>3973364
Important question OP: is Alabaster a grower or a shower?

>>3973393
I'm starting to think at this point that Alabaster would have to live in a state of perpetual arousal just to survive. So a shower for sure.

>>3973039
>Noelle's entrance interrupts you. She stands at the door of your hospital room. "Your sister is an idiot."
Nah, that was probably the smartest move.

>>3973210
You don't actually get more past 3-4ish days depending on your body.

>>3973404
Plus, I'm willing to bet Vivian was totally drugging the applesauce and jacking off Ally in his sleep for strapon fuel.

>>3973416
Diet can totally influence semen production and push it past its normal limits, and proper hydration stops it from clumping together.

>>3973313
>switching holes on the fly
Nice job, Whitney.
>>3973361
Boy I sure hope there's no reason for Alabaster to charge into a burning building where he might be pursued by a practically mummified Russian fucker.

>>3973431
With our bum knee, Stabwound McBulletholes might actually have a chance at catching us, too.

I don't know if any of you will see the same parallels in this that I do, but this is pretty much permanently stuck on repeat in my brain, now that we've entered the True End...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v0LCxwjIc_o

>>3973345
>"Yeah! Yeah, fuck her!" Daddy's got Charlotte bent over the couch, and Rose is encouraging him to nail her.
Good. I hope that Rose, or at least Whitney, has been helping Charlotte meet her needs while Ally's been away.
Also I kind of just realized Chloe's been trapped in the nail house for three weeks without any male oversight. I'm anxious to see her.

>>3973486
Oh god, you're right. She must be absolutely batty by now.

Well, battier.

>>3973488
I can't wait.
Not saying it has to happen, but the episode title suggests this might be a prime time to induct Chloe properly.

I really wanna know what OP's thoughts on the final season of Mr Robot are

>>3973313
Was there ever any way that Whitney could have won the Allybowl, or was that course set by the time season 3 started?

>>3973488
Chloe isn’t batty, she’s knifey. Alex is batty.

>>3974093
i was on the phone and had to hold in a laugh when i got that

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>>3973809
*Blocks your path*

>>3973576
To my great shame, I haven't watched it. I understand the finale aired last night, so I'll have some catching up to do. If you've ever seen Mr. Robot, you probably can tell that it's one of my favorite shows. The first three seasons are excellent, and I'm sure the fourth will be too.

>>3973809
Yes. I talked about this at the end of season 3, but there was a possibility of marrying Whitney. It ended up not materializing, though.

>>3974093
Ah, I see you've played knifey-batty before.

>>3974198
>Yes. I talked about this at the end of season 3, but there was a possibility of marrying Whitney. It ended up not materializing, though.

I'm so ashamed of us.

>>3974405
We made the best decision in all of FQ history

>>3974424
>>3974194

Okay there, Rosefriend.

>>3974405
I feel you, but it's just a ring. It doesn't even really mean anything.

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"Why?"

Chloe descends the stairs, steps jaunty and smirk... smirky. Her typical haughty self.

"Sable Guiteau was a once-in-a-generation genius," Darkbloom says. "On the level of Albert Einstein or Leonardo da Vinci. She made Sand Reckoner far more powerful than it was intended to be. She made it not only into the eye of God but the hand of God, too. Of the billions of people on Earth -- only she was capable of doing that. If we destroy the infrastructure of what she created, before lesser minds can fully apprehend it -- this is our only hope remaining."

"It is too late," Chloe says. "Your government has seized it and will be reverse-engineering the secrets of Sand Reckoner before you hatch a plan to stop them. The Russians already have theirs -- one possibly more powerful, if rumors of the lighthouse are true. I can personally attest that the Chinese also have the basic idea of what Sand Reckoner can wreak at its full potential. They will pursue it relentlessly until it is realized. What need have you, after all, of a single once-in-a-generation genius when you can just throw thousands of regular geniuses at the problem?"

You sniff at the air. "Chill our with the suntan lotion, will you? You're gonna get skin cancer."

"The world's great powers will each have perfected this technology by year's end," Chloe says. "And perhaps it is for the best. Like nuclear weapons, each government is prevented from using theirs by the threat of retaliation. No one can act."

"Perpetual stalemate," Renee says grimly.

"Not a stalemate," Chloe says. "This is the classic chess situation known as zugzwang. No one wants to recreate Sand Reckoner -- all would like to be rid of it. But they are compelled to move by the logic of their position."

"Then even you agree Sand Reckoner should be destroyed," Vivian says.

"I have no use of normative discussions. The word 'should' has no place in my vocabulary unless there is a way to transform it into 'will'."

"Triumph of the will?" You say sarcastically.

"Yes," Chloe says.

She doesn't get the reference. Or maybe she does.

>>3974631
We're back!

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Daddy's finally getting pantsed back up and strolling into the den stinking like his wife's and his mother-in-law's cum. Chloe distastefully plugs her nose.

"There you are," Daddy says. You can hear the click and whirr of his bionic knee with every step he takes. He's using a crutch to help him get around, and probably will be for a while. Not exactly the Six Million Dollar Man -- but it's cute. You wanna give him a leg massage. "I'm surprised you didn't get raped to death by the lesbians you're sleeping with."

"I've had other sleeping arrangements since you were in the hospital," Chloe tells him.

He gives her a severe look. You begin explain the situation: "I slept in Rose's room. And since you and Mommy were sleeping in the hospital..."

"I've been sleeping in your room," Chloe tells him.

Mommy's back at his side, and she's even madder than he is at this news. "What did you just say?" She demands.

"I hope you don't mind. Your marital bed is quite comfortable. I made myself well at home. Well at home."

Mommy grips her by the collar of her blouse. "You slept in my bed?!"

Chloe is passive. She puts a hand forcelessly on Rose's where it grips her collar. "It belongs to Ally. Not to you."

"Forget it," Daddy tells her.

Mommy shoves her away. "Stay out of my fucking room. You're lucky I'm even letting you sleep here."

"That was not your decision either," Chloe says.

Mommy moves as if to charge Chloe -- but Daddy holds her back. He turns then towards Pengu-Darku, now: "Even if we destroy DBA, we have to destroy the lighthouse too -- if this is going to work at all. Any of these devices with the power to alter reality need to be done away with."

"Yes."

>>3974645
oh jesus

>>3974567
It means something to me.
The tomboy needs to win at least fucking once, guys.

>>3974645
>Pengu-Darku
heh

>>3974660
Whitney won in her own way, but I agree that rings mean something. But she's still got the harem mistress role down-pat with Renee.

And they'll all have a part in raising our kids, of course.

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>>3974645
>Pengu-Darku

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"We haven't seen hide nor hair of any Russians since that night," Kay says. "Do you think Alyosha is dead?"

"No," Darkbloom says.

"That's what I thought," Kay replies.

"He will be back sooner rather than later," Darkbloom says. "I am sure of it."

"Alyosha wanted Rose2," Daddy says. "Now all of a sudden he wants you and me instead. Why?"

Darkbloom replies: "he thought Penelope had been lost. Rose Catachresis is an anomaly created by Penelope harnessing the power of Sand Reckoner. So within that anomaly, you might find telltale information about the implant. But why pursue that avenue at all when you can steal the implant itself?"

"Put simply," Vivian says, "Rose the Second is a fingerprint -- but Penelope is the perp."

"Look at you with the Law & Order lingo," Kay says.

"Mm," Vivian murmurs.

"But you don't know where the lighthouse is," Daddy says.

"No," Darkbloom replies, "but think of this. The same way I can blot out the consciousness of a person, like Dalton or Cerise... maybe I am also blotting out the full capabilities of Penelope. My consciousness is a layer above, obscuring the layer below."

"So it's like this," you say. "If we could get your consciousness out of that implant, we could find the lighthouse?"

"Alyosha intimated as much, yes," Darkbloom says. "I do not know so for a fact. But I believe he wanted to transfer me over to Alabaster's implant, so Penelope would be reset -- and usable then as the conduit to find the lighthouse."

"How can we do something like that?" Daddy asks.

"I don't know," Darkbloom admits. "But there is an alternative. Diogenes can undo what Sand Reckoner does. It could delete me from this implant entirely."

"Father--" Vivian begins.

"Alex is the next best thing to Sable Guiteau," Darkbloom says. "If Nelson recommends that only Alex can finish the project -- which is the truth, as far as I am concerned -- he might be allowed to return to Darkbloom Analytics as the chief project engineer."

"No," Kay says.

"Excuse me?" Darkbloom says -- conveying indignation as best as possible with the use of an affectless modulator simulating human speech.

"That has subterfuge written all over it. The idea of inviting Alex back to the company has to seem like it came from their own heads. If Nelson comes to them with it, they'll smell a rat."

"That's true," Daddy says. "...Where is he, anyway?"

"Upstairs," you tell him, "molesting the bunny."

"Totally hooked on bunny pussy," Renee adds. "It's quite sad."

"Oh, you're one to talk," Kay says.

[ ] Find a way to send Alex back to Darkbloom Analytics.
[ ] Find an alternative way to remove Darkbloom's mind from the implant.

>>3974677
>[x] Find an alternative way to remove Darkbloom's mind from the implant.

I don't like this. I don't like this at all.

>>3974677
>[x] Find an alternative way to remove Darkbloom's mind from the implant.
I don't like the idea of sending Alex back into the beast alone, though I admittedly don't have any idea of what the alternative options are.

>>3974660
I'm sure there are plenty of series where the tomboy's won anon. Calm down

>>3974677
>[x] Find a way to send Alex back to Darkbloom Analytics.

Trust the best boy.

>>3974694
I trust Alex. I don't trust the world around him.

>>3974677
>[ ] Find an alternative way to remove Darkbloom's mind from the implant.

>>3974677
Alternate.

>>3974696
People we love will be in danger anyway you cut it. I’d rather Alex who we know can handle himself be doing it. What’s the alternative, let David bodyjack Vivian, Alabaster, or Amber? No thank you.

>>3974677
>[ ] Find an alternative way to remove Darkbloom's mind from the implant.

>>3974677
>[ ] Find a way to send Alex back to Darkbloom Analytics.

>>3974703
I don't see how memory-dumping him would do anything. Can't we like run a factory reset on it or something? Then update it through interfacing it with the other implants? The second part's been done before, and if Penelope was supposed to be the production model, then there's gotta be a way to do the first, right?

>>3974711
I phrased that first statement poorly. I don't see how memory-dumping him into somebody else's body is an option*

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"Hey kid." Whitney knocks on the door of her own bedroom and steps inside. Alex is lying on the bed, sweaty and spent, limbs all entangled with Samantha. Bare chest heaving, he crawls free of her and rises to his butt. He sits Indian-style with the heels of his palms resting on the mattress between his legs. And... with something else sticking up, still twitching.

Whitney explains -- poorly, but passably -- what the situation is.

"Oh," Alex says, looking serious. "Sure. I'll go back to Darkbloom Analytics, if it'll help."

"No," you say, "I don't want you going back there."

"Why not, Ally?"

"Because you'll be in danger. There's another way. I don't know what. But there has to be. You've been through enough... Vail was enough. You don't need to put yourself at risk like that again."

He blushes, hard, all over his pale, wet, nude body. "Ally... you're... you're so sweet."

You're blushing, too. "It's just because I..." you begin. But you stop, sighing. That thing is still poking up from his lap, slimy and twitching. Exasperatedly, you motion at him with a palm. "Could you please put some fucking pants on when we're having a heart-to-heart?"

He giggles. "Sorry." He gets dressed. Samantha doesn't.

>>3974746
Cute and good

>>3974746
I really hope this was the right decision. But we can't keep asking people to make sacrifices in our place.

>>3974753
Yeah, last time we asked someone to go undercover for us it ended in the worst possible way.

;_;7 Ken

>>3974746
Super gay

>>3974766
Whatever you say, Cerise.

>>3974766
Isn’t it great?

>>3974687
anon...

>>3974746
>Being bothered by another man's erect cock

why is Ally so incredibly gay?

>>3974791
The presence of erect cock is very gay. Ally should suck it, so it stops being so erect. That's the only way to purge the gay from the room.

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Alex, decent again, sits back down on the bed. "In a situation like this," he says, "I ask myself: WWSD."

"Please tell me that doesn't stand for what I think it does," you say.

"When it comes to Sand Reckoner, sometimes you have to think like she does. Or -- like she did."

"Wait, wait," Whitney says. She doesn't know what you two mean. "Let me guess. WWSD... hmm. World Wide... no. We Won't Stop -- hmm. We Will Stop Sand Reckoner?"

"That would be WWSSR," you say.

"Fuck."

"What Would Samantha Do!" Samantha says. She rapidly kicks her feet on the mattress. "Welllll... I know what I would do... since I am her."

Alex slaps her ass. She giggles.

"I'm stumped, then," Whitney says.

"What would Sable do," Alex tells her.

"...Oh. Shit, yeah. That makes sense."

"Sable wanted to destroy Darkbloom Analytics, too," Alex says. "In the end, she got to the same conclusion we did. And she had a way to do it. Without endangering you, Ally -- or anyone else who got their eyeballs tinkered with."

You cock your head.

"I found it in her notes. I'd need access to the central server hub underneath the campus, but -- I guess Nelson could do that step. I can coordinate finishing Diogenes with him, from the outside -- and once it's done, it can be used to upgrade your implants so they function without the need of the servers. And Diogenes could reset Penelope, too, just like David suspects. Once that's all done... well... the sewer system under the campus still has plenty of room for some plastic explosives, right?"

It has the basic outline of a plan, anyway.

>>3974778
Read Tomo-chan or something

>>3974794
Alabaster approves this message

>>3974804
And here we go again.

>>3974804
hell yeah blow shit up

>>3974804
Welcome back, my friends, to the show that never ends. We're so glad you could attend. Come inside. Come inside.

>>3974804
>Alex, decent again, sits back down on the bed. "In a situation like this," he says, "I ask myself: WWSD."
Kek

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That night, you lie in bed with Rose. Amber snores softly between your bodies.

"Do you think we're doomed?" You ask.

Rose turns to her side and gazes at you. "Hmm?"

You mirror her. Your chins are practically touching over the crown of Amber's head.

"When we got back from China. You said you thought we were doomed. Do you still think so?"

"I don't know," she says. "Do you?"

"...I don't know."

"I just want to get to the next day," Rose says. "If I get to tomorrow with what I have today... that's enough. Thinking about the future beyond that is too exhausting."

You kiss her.

"I feel gross," Rose says. "Just knowing that that Chloe cunt was sleeping in here."

"Language, language, language," you say.

"What?"

"Never mind."

"You're not going to fuck her, are you?" Rose asks. "I know she's a pretty girl and this is the Nail House and everything -- but even you have to have standards."

You shrug.

"I could beat her ass, I'm so mad," Rose says.

"Are you sure you don't wanna fuck her too?" You ask.

She shrugs.

[ ] Let's fuck Chloe.
[ ] Let's make Chloe really want it.
[ ] Let's find something else fun to do.

>>3974853
>[x] Let's make Chloe really want it.

>>3974853
>[ ] Let's make Chloe really want it.
It wouldn't be COOL DEVICES otherwise.

>>3974853
>[X] Let's make Chloe really want it.
Buildups have payoffs.

>>3974853
>[ ] Let's fuck Chloe.
Y E S

>>3974853
>[X] Let's make Chloe really want it.

>>3974853
>[x] Let's make Chloe really want it.

Having Rose take the initiative on this is too delicious.

>>3974853
>[ ] Let's make Chloe really want it.

>>3974853
>[x] Let's make Chloe really want it.

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>[X] Let's make Chloe really want it.

Gotcha.

Rose will assist.

Should anyone else help out? And if so, who?

>>3974870
Whitney, of course. The chicom has had it coming for way too long. If there's one girl we have to follow the rules with, it's her.

>>3974870
Well it's basically a rite of passage for Nail House residents to be fucked by
>[x] Whitney

>>3974870
Samantha, if only because THAT meeting of the minds will be hilarious.

>>3974870
Sometimes less is more. I’d like to see just Rose and Ally tormenting Chloe.

>>3974870
W H I T N E Y

It's to soon for Alex, but hopefully sometime they can fuck out their differences.

>>3974870
N O E L L E

>>3974870
Let's start off with just Rose and Alabaster for now. The others will get their chance later

>>3974890
Even if we don't get it right now, we really need a scene of Noelle and Kay doubleteaming Chloe late into the night.

>>3974870
I can still stand behind Samantha and Noelle, but I'm gonna have Whitney in this action for now.

>>3974870
Just Rose and Ally are enough, I think.

>>3974890
>>3974898
I think we'd all agree that at some point Noelle needs to mount a land invasion on Chloe.

>>3974870
Nah, no further help needed

>>3974870
Noelle!

>>3974898
In a totally NOT LESBIAN way. Just Noelle performing an FBI standard cavity search... with her tongue. And Kay “vetting” a new source.

Please wait warmly.

>>3974870
Whitney.

>>3974935
Hoooo boy.

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It's Charlotte all over again.

>>3974940
I'm curious, Anonymous-dono, why do you say that?

>>3974944
When Ally went to comfort Charlotte we had a vote to partner up or go solo. Solo and Whitney tied, and we got a really neat scene where Whitney swooped in after the fact.
[I think] She just drew again.

>>3974956
Aha, gotcha. I think the Charlotte vote came because everyone missed Whitney overall (a sentiment that seems to have been echoed quite a bit in recent episodes). I just figured that as much as Whitney hates Chloe, this would be the best way for her to...

Well, "reconcile things" probably isn't the best way to put it. But I'm sure there's a Whitneyism in there somewhere that fits.

>>3974958
>But I'm sure there's a Whitneyism in there somewhere that fits.
Nan King is probably what you're looking for.

>>3974958
I'm probably guilty of stirring the Whitney pot pretty often lately. The pleasure of having a high-metabolism tomboy to sleep/play/fuck with during the cooler months cannot be adequately put into words. I may back off a bit though.

>>3974967
Through dick, unity.

>>3974974
>I may back off a bit though.
Please don't, I've missed her too. There's no Fuck in Fuck Quest without her, after all.

>>3974974
What are tomboys for, if not hot lesbian rape, and conserving body heat through direct contact in cold winter months?
Don't make me post that image macro. You know already. Plenty of things.

>>3974974
It just feels like we went a long time without a dedicated whitney lewd.

>>3974992
Goat Whitney Lewds were Season 1. Now it’s the others girls time to shine as much as that pains me. Also shame nothing in any season will ever topple the Renee blue balling jeopardy session climazing in Eskimo kisses that the large audience we had back in the first had to wait warmly through.

>>3975017
I'm totally making a stealth-FQ thread on /a/ to celebrate the final episode. I wonder how long we can get away with it.

>>3975022
I remember a couple years ago when I still browsed 4chan and /a/ regularly seeing people still make FQ reference in ideal harem threads or Waifu threads someone would post Makoto and someone would call her Whitney or shit like that. I’m sure a bunch of people would come out of the wood work and talk about painting stuff green in celebration.

>>3975035
I've done a LOT of archive crawling as part of my shadowruns, and it's amazing how many threads have popped up mentioning it both on /a/ and /tg/ over the years. People never forgot, even if we've tapered off a bit over the course of this last season.

>>3975035
>>3975042
Yeah, it still happens. Chuu2 and Onee-san threads always get the a Cerise reference. I saw someone reply to a picture of Makoto with literally just a can of green paint once. It made my kokoro go doki doki.

>>3974660
Whitney won the hell out of Season 1

>>3974808
I know and I have rosefriend, but there's a long running trope of the tomboy/childhood friend losing in a harem

Sorry for the extra warm wait. Editing now. This is a real doozy.

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>>3975092
Ohhh man.

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>>3975092

>>3975090
Oh, if you're talking childhood friends then yeah, I can't help you. Yotsuba won 5toubun recently. She's not really a childhood friend but she's kinda close and she's more genki than tomboy but, hey, it's something

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https://pastebin.com/1qYH4ZZW

>>3975122
It's here!

>>3975122
>piss
fuck this I'm out

>>3975122
oof oh fuck

>>3975132
Oh hush.

>>3975141

It's not Fuck Quest if someone doesn't complain about watersports. I should have warned folks though. I didn't do an alternate version because it only comes at the end.

>>3975122
Next time it’s tender solo. Chloe deserves better treatment after her uncle.

>>3975149
you're right
she should be degraded even more ruthlessly

>>3975122
>"What happened to you? Did these pervs rape you?"

>Qiangxiang shakes her head sadly.

You have no idea how genuinely hilarious this mental image is.

>>3975152
Heh, I can even picture Chloe sighing through the gag as she did this.

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Rose2 lies across your lap on the couch, sucking you like a lollipop. And alternating that with sucking an actual lollipop. You idly watch TV, petting her (why did she feel the need to wear cat ears?), while she does all the work.

When Rose comes into the living room, stretching and yawning, she sees it. She freezes, growing indignant:

"Hey! You said I'd have first turn this morning!"

"You slept in," you tell her, shrugging.

Noelle, sitting beside you, smiles at her. "That's what you get for living like a disgusting NEET. Early bird catches the worm."

Rose trots hurriedly across the room and tries to get down on her knees in front of you, to force Rose2 to share. You push her back, though.

"Let Rosie have her turn," you say. "You got more than enough last night."

Rose, standing again, stomps angrily.

Rose2 pulls off of you, and grins smugly up at her, chin coated in saliva. "Rose wins," she says.

"Tch -- you little fucking -- I can't even believe --"

"Rose wins."

She resumes her task, as Rose storms out.

Noelle is already back to browsing the web on the thinkpad in her lap. "Excited?" She asks.

"I'm excited to blow my load in a few seconds," you say lewdly, bouncing a little.

"Not that, freak. Comiket."

You glance her way.

"Comiket's next week," she says.

"With everything -- you still want to go?" You say.

She shrugs. "Could be dead tomorrow. Might as well live life to its fullest."

>>3975166
>Comiket arc is actually happening

Holy shit

>>3975166
>"Comiket's next week," she says.
>"With everything -- you still want to go?" You say.
>She shrugs. "Could be dead tomorrow. Might as well live life to its fullest."

WHAT

IT'S GONNA BE REAL?

AND NOT AN OVA???

>>3975166
OH FUCK

>>3975166
>Noelle is already back to browsing the web on the thinkpad in her lap.
Best taste. Should have known Noelle would love the nipple.

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You shake your head and channel surf some more as you enjoy Rose2's skilled mouth. As you flick through the stations, you wind up on the news. A reporter is broadcasting live from the gates of Darkbloom Analytics. The demonstration, now in its second day, is getting unruly. Protestors are setting little fires, banging drums and throwing stones. The network's reporter is on the roof of the parking garage across the street from the gates, which gives a nice vantage of things. Darkbloom Analytics looks like a medieval castle under siege, surrounded on all sides by a sea of humanity.

"...no clear indication of what their intentions might be. The White House, meanwhile, refuses to comment, saying only that it continues to work closely alongside Darkbloom Analytics on all matters that pertain to national security. But as you can see--"

The reporter suddenly stoops, clutching his earpiece to his head and holding his other hand out, the one holding his mic. He stumbles forward, out of frame, as gunfire rings out in the crowd below.

"Jim, get that, get that!" He yells to his cameraman.

The screen becomes a nausea-making whirl of indistinct motion before settling again on a view of the crowd. The image is blurry at first, as if through gauze, but refocuses a few moments later. And so that's when you can see it: police decked out in full riot gear, mowing down the screaming protestors. And they aren't using rubber bullets, no sir.

END OF EPISODE 11.

>>3975175
OH FUCK
IT'S FUCKING HAPPENING

>>3975175
I can't believe Darkbloom Analytics reanimated the corpse of Henry Ford.

>>3975175
Ah fuck. Sable was right. Peer to peer is the only way to prevent a dystopian nightmare.

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>>3975175
Gun
Fire in the street
Where we used to meet

>>3975175
>>3975166
This is Fuck Quest.

The Second American Civil War is starting.
World War III is inevitable.
The world is falling apart around us.

We're going to Comiket. Because fuck all of it.They fucked with things they didn't understand and are going to pay the consequences. We're going to have a beer with ZUN.

>>3975175
Well. This is the downturn, then.
How's comiket's stance on security?

>>3975175
AAAAAAAAAAAAAA

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>>3975184
Soon.

>>3975186
Think we'd get there safely? Not without outside assistance. With the Gubmint going full Fourth Reich, if we even booked travel plans out of the country, we'd be drone-strike priority 1.

Though... I'm willing to bet that if we negotiated for asylum with the Japanese government, they could extricate us and Ken under assumed identities.... From there, its a small jump across to the Motherland, and Alaska's just across the Bering Straight...

It's doable

>>3975192
AmeriKet. It's been teased since we met Noelle, it's an event we're going to happening here in the US (in the FQniverse).

>>3975192
Did you forget? Comiket is being hosted in San Francisco. We don't even have to leave the state!

Doesn't mean we're safe. Not by a looooong shot.