RIP breadsticks

Rolled 65 (1d100)

>>4174684
> Short shares in Burger Lord stonks.

I mean, of we're gonna frame them, it's gonna fuck their SP.

File: 1.png (8 KB, 500x500)

8 KB PNG

>>4174725
The fuck you're doing here? Don't you know thread's dead?

Rolled 56 (1d100)

>>4174733
Dead... or extra shitposty??

File: 1.png (8 KB, 500x500)

8 KB PNG

>>4174742
Preeeetty dead. So if you excuse me, Imma lie in this grave. Wake me up when shit's alive.

>>4174752
Welp.
>F

>>4174752
Fucks sake OP, give some warning first so I can schedule

File: 1.png (176 KB, 5000x5000)

176 KB PNG

>>4174756
>>4174759
I have nothing left to give except the biggest F i'm legally allowed

>>4174772
Break da ruuls OP, make it bigger, and on first, and a pirate hat

>>4174772
It's pretty big I guess

>>4174774
I actually can't, 4chan doesn't let me post higher resolutions

>>4174780
How cowardly of it, ah well go to sleep then and watch your liver

>>4174785
It's gonna explode any day now. But thanks anon. I'll get up an continue in about, eeeh, 10 hours

File: heavy is dead bald sniper.jpg (142 KB, 1280x720)

142 KB JPG

>>4174752
>>4174772
OP is dead!

Rolled 64 (1d100)

>>4174797
It should have been you!

No really though. Kill yourself.

File: 2020-04-05 02.43.38.jpg (443 KB, 1072x1357)

443 KB JPG

>>4174797
Here lied OP; we loved him until we didn't

>>4174788
Shame I'll be asleep by then, but what can you do

Rolled 95 (1d100)

>>4176039
Let's get ready to invade. Do we have a galaxy burger uniform for ourselves?

File: 1.png (9 KB, 500x500)

9 KB PNG

>>4176040
"Yeah? We raided one of their burger joints and got some, sis"

Rolled 50 (1d100)

>>4176048
hell yeah let's wear it.
prep the plane, let's fly.

Rolled 75 (1d100)

>>4176048
on with the plan you maggot

File: 1.png (8 KB, 500x500)

8 KB PNG

>>4176055
You load up your troops onto the United Shota Sniffing Republic plane and head off.

Sure hope nothign happens on the way. Like, random sky encounters or suymthing

Rolled 60 (1d100)

>>4176064
Throw some random dice.

Rolled 86 (1d100)

>>4176064
yes, all according to keikaku
>translators note : 'keikaku' means plan

File: 1.png (7 KB, 500x500)

7 KB PNG

>>4176069
>>4176077
Anyway. Roll 2d100

Second roll results:
- 70-100: Nothing happens, you go there with 0 troubles
- 50-69: Accidentally flew over a monster island and agitated a giant sky beast
- 30-49: Smacked into a flying hero
- 10-29: Smacked into a whole hero team
- 1-9: Smacked into a whole hero team fighting some villains, with a kaiju present, while in the middle of a thunderstorm

Rolled 9, 31 = 40 (2d100)

>>4176086
aw shit niggaaaaa

Rolled 82, 47 = 129 (2d100)

>>4176086

File: 1.png (10 KB, 500x500)

10 KB PNG

>>4176095
"BIG SIS, WE HIT SOMETHING"

Rolled 68 (1d100)

>>4176104
THE HELL WAS THAT? check the windshield

>>4176104
Oh what

Rolled 4 (1d100)

>>4176104
>>4176109

File: 1.png (12 KB, 500x500)

12 KB PNG

>>4176108
You went to the cockpit and see....a dude

Rolled 15 (1d100)

>>4176134
Well, ain't that convenient
Capture him.

Rolled 13 (1d100)

>>4176134
Wave.

>>4176134
Quickly, get him to help us liberate the oppressed people of Floaty Elf Island!

File: 1.png (12 KB, 500x500)

12 KB PNG

Rolled 28 (1d100)

>>4176140
Good thing this plane comes equipped with a Grabbing Claw.

ROLL 2D100

THAT DUDE OUTSIDE HAS A +20 bonus

Rolled 93 (1d100)

>>4176151

Rolled 55, 16 = 71 (2d100)

>>4176151
we rolling

Rolled 91 (1d100)

>>4176150
>>4176134

Rolled 5, 81 = 86 (2d100)

>>4176151
>>4176154
Fuck.

Rolled 73, 24 = 97 (2d100)

>>4176151

Rolled 17, 19 = 36 (2d100)

>>4176151
Really now

File: 1.png (12 KB, 500x500)

12 KB PNG

>>4176156
He stops the claw!

Rolled 66, 14 = 80 (2d100)

>>4176151
Fuck

Rolled 61 (1d100)

>>4176180
Oi idiot, what are you doing, we are trying to get you in so it's safer

>>4176180
Scribble on a sign that we're trying to conquer liberate some elves, and if he wants to join. Otherwise get off the plane cuz we got stuff to do.

Rolled 30 (1d100)

>>4176180
>>4176188
fucking DICE ARGH

File: 1.png (7 KB, 500x500)

7 KB PNG

>>4176182
"Psst, sis. Are we really doing that?"

Rolled 76 (1d100)

>>4176197
Not exactly, we just don't want to fight him right now, just convince him to help us and then get him to do a heroic sacrifice or something

File: 1.png (7 KB, 500x500)

7 KB PNG

>>4176203
"Oh, then be sure NOT to press the Lethal Aggressiveness button on the Grabbing Claw control panel"

Rolled 36 (1d100)

>>4176213
We'll save that for later
>>4176188

File: 1.png (10 KB, 500x500)

10 KB PNG

Rolled 18 (1d100)

>>4176217
Will this hero be gullible enough to help?

Roll 2d100

Rolled 90, 63 = 153 (2d100)

>>4176234

Rolled 28 (1d100)

>>4176203
>>4176213

Rolled 41, 90 = 131 (2d100)

>>4176234
We've been hired to help open up their borders to free trade . . . . With BurgerLords!

File: 1.png (10 KB, 500x500)

10 KB PNG

>>4176237
The fool hears of oppressed people needs saving and he agrees to help. Letting go of the claw and allowing himself to be taken in

Rolled 13 (1d100)

>>4176254
ah yes, with the assistance of generic hero #546289, we will succeed in liberating the floating island

File: 1.png (6 KB, 500x500)

6 KB PNG

>>4176260
"Actually, that's my cousin. I'm actually generic hero #546295. I'm trying to increase me rep and get a cooler name tho"

>>4176279
> Offer to pimp his style.

We got that villain swag. Let's give him a makover.

Sweet Trench coat and a hat, at least.

Rolled 23 (1d100)

>>4176279
Oh ok, then surely a tyrannic elf king who likes to oppress his people will increase your rep to the point of a cool name with his own theme.

Rolled 69 (1d100)

>>4176279
>>4176286
Marketing! The strongest weapon in a hero's arsenal!

File: 1.png (8 KB, 500x500)

8 KB PNG

>>4176291
"Wow thanks. But I gotta ask. Who are you guys? Judging from the plane and military style look you got going on, and that you're about to liberate an oppressed country, I though you were some sort of Resistance army or something. But some of you dressed like medieval knights....and also maids. So I dunno"

Rolled 9 (1d100)

>>4176306
We recently unified into one. It's pretty confusing.

Rolled 79 (1d100)

>>4176306
"Mercenaries hired by BurgerLords as part of their charitable deductions free-trade internal incentivization program. We're here to free the people, and free their trade."

Rolled 36 (1d100)

>>4176306
Also make his trenchcoat yellow and give him the callsign "Quattro".

We have a new chump on the team.

File: 1.png (6 KB, 500x500)

6 KB PNG

>>4176315
"Ah, so you're a charity merc company. Alright. So, who are we fighting? "

Rolled 61 (1d100)

>>4176320
An oppressive, selfish elf king who's powermad and probably vegan

Rolled 45 (1d100)

>>4176320
This elf king guy who fancies himself a god, dude's a jerk.

File: 1.png (6 KB, 500x500)

6 KB PNG

>>4176326

"Oppressive, selfish, powermad AND vegan?! He must be stopped. How can I help?"

Rolled 15 (1d100)

>>4176331
let him join the squad with rasputin and co
useful meatshield

Rolled 74 (1d100)

>>4176331
Be the vanguard

File: 1.png (8 KB, 500x500)

8 KB PNG

>>4176335
"Okay. I'll join your troops in the frontline!"

"Sis! We're closing in on the sky island!"

Rolled 66 (1d100)

>>4176331
Challenge him publicly, to distract him while we save the people!

Rolled 69 (1d100)

>>4176346
Let's hope VP and Chosen One have sabotaged the defenses

Rolled 51 (1d100)

>>4176346
RAMMING SPEED!

File: 1.png (6 KB, 500x500)

6 KB PNG

>>4176351
"We've managed to disabled the AA guns and radars so you can approach without being detected. BUt we haven't destroyed them since it would alert the enemy to our presence. Currently they're merely turned off"

Rolled 25 (1d100)

>>4176361
sneakly ramming speed

Rolled 88 (1d100)

>>4176361
Alright, VP, how's the situation aboveground, is the elf king going to start his speech?

Rolled 28 (1d100)

>>4176367
W>>4176361

File: 1.png (8 KB, 500x500)

8 KB PNG

>>4176370
"Yes. All the citizens are gathered in the Grand Cathedral. With multiple golems surrounding it. While the rest of the Golem forces are patrolling the city. The golems inside the mines are currently inactive to save power. The Elf King will start his weekly self jerk off session, I mean speech, in about 20 minutes. Usually it'd last for at least 5 hours"

Rolled 65 (1d100)

>>4176391
I wonder if we could hijack those golems below, anyway it seems like the mines are clear for landing.
And keep saying weekly self jerk off session because that's what it is.

Rolled 37 (1d100)

>>4176391
elves are horrid creatures after all

File: 1.png (8 KB, 500x500)

8 KB PNG

>>4176396
"Roger that. I'll head back down to the mines and open the landing zone. See you there. Chosen One will stay topside to be the lookout"

Rolled 15 (1d100)

>>4176404
Luke I need you to be part of the vanguard. We are going to introduce the citizens to the concept of meat

Rolled 5 (1d100)

>>4176404
and now sneakly ramming speed, while trying to withhold grudge of genocide of all elves

File: 1.png (7 KB, 500x500)

7 KB PNG

>>4176409
"Ah, so while fighting the golems and the Elf King, I should also randomly fling BBQ sausages at the citizens?"

Rolled 68 (1d100)

>>4176419
Is that what you want to do?

Rolled 55 (1d100)

>>4176419
I think they would enjoy sausages as faggots they are, you better throwing actual meat instead

File: 1.png (7 KB, 500x500)

7 KB PNG

>>4176422
"I'd prefer to hold a proper BBQ after the combat, actually"

Rolled 23 (1d100)

>>4176433
don't waste food then

Rolled 18 (1d100)

>>4176433
We can do that AFTER we get rid of the elf king, for now, scream space burger slogans to distract the elf king into sending golems against space burger

Rolled 96 (1d100)

>>4176433
I think we should throw a pizza party after all is said and done instead, pizza is better than BBQ.

Rolled 41 (1d100)

>>4176443
No we're framing the Burger Lords. Pizza doesn't make any sense.

File: 1.png (8 KB, 500x500)

8 KB PNG

>>4176443
"Sure. Aslongasitsnotyouthatsmakingthefoodanyway, ahem, hrrrrm. Yes."

"WE'RE APPROACHING THE ENTRY POINT, BRACE FOR IMPACT"

Rolled 69 (1d100)

>>4176455
OLESSA, WHAT DID YOU DO
I THOUGHT WE WERE JUST GOING THROUGH THE HOLE

>>4176453
It does, Pizza is the antithesis of Burgers.

File: Spoiler Image (1.62 MB, 1280x720)

1.62 MB PNG

Rolled 37 (1d100)

>>4176453
burger pizza
>>4176455
If we had a drill in front would we still needed to brace for impact?

>>4176459
"THE HOLE AINT BIG ENOUGH FOR THE PLANE, IM MAKING IT BIGGER"

File: 1.png (23 KB, 500x500)

23 KB PNG

>>4176475
whoops, forgot pic

Rolled 46 (1d100)

>>4176475
> RAMMING SPEED

Rolled 71 (1d100)

>>4176476
>olessa likes to crash things
OH GOD

Rolled 100 (1d100)

>>4176475
>>4176476
good girl
Pierce thru!

>>4176482
>100
INCOMING

File: 1.png (18 KB, 500x500)

18 KB PNG

Rolled 97 (1d100)

>>4176482
ROLL 2D100 OH SHIT

Rolled 7, 52 = 59 (2d100)

>>4176492
LUKE WHY DIDN'T YOU TELL US THAT OLESSA IS A FAN OF CRASHING

Rolled 89, 88 = 177 (2d100)

>>4176492

File: 1.png (20 KB, 500x500)

20 KB PNG

>>4176500
"Oh right. Uh. Guess I got too sued to it that it slipped my mi--"

With a thunderous crash, the plan penetrates the island and goes right into the mines, causing a small earthquake across the area. The golems in the barracks have been alerted and will activate.

While you contemplate that, I will have to...suspend thread. For about 15-20 minutes. I gotta take a huge shit

Rolled 22 (1d100)

>>4176519
While OP empties his bowels, faceplam at the fact that your attempt to sneakily take over the golems has been ruined because Olessa didn't bother to wait for VP to clear the area for entry

Rolled 18 (1d100)

>>4176519
>>4176529
Facepalm harder.

dice god gives and takes away

File: 1.png (4 KB, 500x500)

4 KB PNG

Here lies OP. His ass exploded

Rolled 64 (1d100)

>>4176570
Explode the grave

Rolled 57 (1d100)

>>4176570
Surely we can build him a new one, right?

File: 1.png (11 KB, 500x500)

11 KB PNG

>>4176572

Rolled 92 (1d100)

>>4176577
now get back to the plot lazy butt

File: 1.png (13 KB, 500x500)

13 KB PNG

>>4176580
Yes of course. Infiltration successful

Rolled 29 (1d100)

>>4176588
>>4176529

Rolled 96 (1d100)

>>4176588
Weaken the floor! When the golems come, we can collapse it and they'll fall while our ship can fly!

File: 1.png (13 KB, 500x500)

13 KB PNG

>>4176593
"Sis, did the crash messed up your noggin' or something. We're on a plane, not an airship"

Rolled 32 (1d100)

>>4176599
Why did we even bother crashing, we just needed time to carve out a bigger hole

Rolled 19 (1d100)

>>4176599
time to get out and continue the operation

File: 1.png (13 KB, 500x500)

13 KB PNG

>>4176600
"This is faster!"

Rolled 99 (1d100)

>>4176599
Falling is acceleration. Just pull up before hitting the ground.

Rolled 58 (1d100)

>>4176603
Yeah now the golems are awake and we need to take them out

>>4176604
m8 we kinda already hit the ground

File: 1.png (13 KB, 500x500)

13 KB PNG

>>4176606
Speaking of which

"Beep boop, what the shit"

Rolled 45 (1d100)

>>4176613
Oh hey, would you like to hear about the joys of nonveganism?

Rolled 63 (1d100)

>>4176607
In a FLOATING ISLAND.

>>4176613
Accuse them of crashing their island into our ship and demand to see their insurance information

File: 1.png (7 KB, 500x500)

7 KB PNG

>>4176622
"Again, sis. What ship?"

Rolled 37 (1d100)

>>4176625
>>4176617
before >>4176622 deludes himself into believing he's a pirate

Rolled 23 (1d100)

>>4176625
fine, imbecile. accuse them of crashing their island on our plane

Rolled 2 (1d100)

>>4176625
THE SS FRIENDSHIP THAT WE CAME HERE IN GOOD WILL WITH ON OUR PLANE.

Rolled 83 (1d100)

>>4176626
They're golems.

They don't eat, they already aren't Vegan.

File: 1.png (12 KB, 500x500)

12 KB PNG

Rolled 23 (1d100)

>>4176626
"beep boop, meat is murder"

"which is what we're about to do to you, beep boop"

ROLL 2d100!

Rolled 86, 37 = 123 (2d100)

>>4176632

>>4176622
It's still made of ground tho. Like the golems will be soon

Rolled 43, 14 = 57 (2d100)

>>4176632
die scrap metal scum

File: 1.png (14 KB, 500x500)

14 KB PNG

>>4176634
The Golems open fire! You ducked in time and suffered no damage as their voley destroys the USSR plane windshield! Time to retaliate, send out your troops!

Rolled 90 (1d100)

>>4176649
Neutralise them now!

Rolled 14 (1d100)

>>4176649
Grind them until they're ground into the ground!

File: 1.png (23 KB, 500x500)

23 KB PNG

>>4176653
Your troops engage in battle with the golems!

Rolled 6 (1d100)

>>4176659
throw an emp grenade on the golens

Rolled 51 (1d100)

>>4176659
VP, see if you can subvert them!

File: 1.png (10 KB, 500x500)

10 KB PNG

Rolled 27 (1d100)

>>4176664
"Gimme a sec"

ROLL 2d100 for VP! He has +20 bonus!

Rolled 82, 29 = 111 (2d100)

>>4176666
primitive programming

Rolled 67, 59 = 126 (2d100)

>>4176666

File: 1.png (11 KB, 500x500)

11 KB PNG

>>4176667
"Got it. The firewall's fairly simple to get through. These things usually relied on magic to keep people tampering with 'em. But they're a bit far away from the Elf King and the Blues are throwing around anti-magic wards. I got these ones under control. But their may be more of them in the barracks"

Rolled 50 (1d100)

>>4176676
why not hijack all of them? can you do that if you get some sort of relay station going on this floating island

File: 1.png (9 KB, 500x500)

9 KB PNG

>>4176679
"...well....yeah. Currently my signal's only good for this squad of golems. If we can get a booster going on, I can take over their entire golem army, like the time I took over Marian's robot army during the Skeleton island 1. Available for download now at http://www.mediafire.com/file/4j7j24a8o0doqmn/Skeleton_Island.zip"

Rolled 18 (1d100)

>>4176682
Then the barracks would have a big booster, we should use those golems to sneak by and take over

>>4176682
That promo needs more coldgate commercial.
Can this booster be located somewhere on island?

Rolled 43 (1d100)

>>4176686
this

Rolled 28 (1d100)

>>4176682
>>4176689
fug

File: 1.png (10 KB, 500x500)

10 KB PNG

>>4176686
"Roger that. I'll send the golems over there now"

And while that happens....I got suspend thread for real now. Some shite's happening in the complex and I gotta go sort it out. Toodles.

updates b here: https://twitter.com/notapaladin

>>4176699
thanks for bread

>>4176699
tyvm for the golems

here we go

File: RIP.png (13 KB, 700x550)

13 KB PNG

>>4177011
Yes. But go where anon? Where shall you lead us?

Rolled 74 (1d100)

>>4177020
Let's see what Quattro is up to

File: 1.png (13 KB, 500x500)

13 KB PNG

>>4177025

Rolled 9 (1d100)

>>4177029
He's joined by Bobby and Zebra somehow

Rolled 62 (1d100)

>>4177029
I've seen him worse. His emotional scars are bigger than his physical scars.
Sure let's have him joined by some others >>4177031

>>4177032
>His emotional scars are bigger than his physical scars.
Being kidnapped just as you tried to improve is pretty emotionally scarring

File: 1.png (13 KB, 500x500)

13 KB PNG

>>4177032
"I gotta get outta here" Quattro muses to himself. It's the only thought left he got left in his skull, which has been too rattled to think of anything else

Rolled 45 (1d100)

>>4177039
"Yeah no. You're not getting out."

Rolled 15 (1d100)

>>4177039
Quattro enters meditation, the only thing left for him to do while he's stuck here.

File: 1.png (23 KB, 500x500)

23 KB PNG

>>4177041
"And you never will. Because you are weak, Quattro. You are weak and useless" says the manifestation of Quattro's self doubt

Rolled 49 (1d100)

>>4177048
"Oh god, are you one of those Shadow things my younger brother keeps talking about"

Rolled 1 (1d100)

>>4177052
Shit's getting serious. Quattro must fight back and resolve his inner conflicts before he can grow stronger.

Rolled 99 (1d100)

>>4177048
You're no chill, piss off

File: 1.png (29 KB, 500x500)

29 KB PNG

>>4177052
"Maybe. Maybe not. Maybe you'd know if you'd bothered to listen instead of lazing around all day. But you can't help it, can you? When you're so useless, it's not like it'd make a difference"

Rolled 20 (1d100)

>>4177058
:Come on, give me a break, I was kidnapped by my own subordinates from another dimension just as I was about to start...again."

Rolled 14 (1d100)

>>4177058
"I'm not afraid to admit I only have myself to blame. I cared more about my siblings than winning some stupid competition. But does that make me weak?"

Rolled 78 (1d100)

>>4177058
Look man, everyone has their place, mine is behind the bar and grill, chilling and having fun, it just so happens a particular blob hates me
You want a mean cocktail?

File: 1.png (30 KB, 500x500)

30 KB PNG

>>4177063
"What cocktail? You know how hard it is to get alcohol in prison? You've contemplated making prison hooch using the toilet a few days ago before the latest beatings rattled your skull and made you see me"

Rolled 99 (1d100)

>>4177068
Speaking of latest beatings...
"QUATTRO, YOU HAVE NEW FRIENDS TO JOIN YOU FOR TODAY"

Rolled 18 (1d100)

>>4177068
Toilet Wine is a thing, what do they want anyways?

File: 1.png (7 KB, 500x500)

7 KB PNG

>>4177072
"Sup" said the manifestation of Quattro's desire....for a new pair of sunglasses

Rolled 41 (1d100)

>>4177076
Yo, you know what they even want?

File: 1.png (10 KB, 500x500)

10 KB PNG

>>4177078
"Man, I'm just a part of your fractured psyche. I can't know anything that you don't"

Rolled 93 (1d100)

>>4177082
"Betty, I think you beat the shit out of him too hard"

Rolled 57 (1d100)

>>4177082
Fine I'll ask, hey what do you even want from me!?

File: 1.png (10 KB, 500x500)

10 KB PNG

>>4177083
"It's all part of the plan, trust me. We just need to wait until they get here"

"It's just....I don't see how giving him extreme severe brain damage would help"

"It's to make his final transformation all the more powerful"

"Really?"

"Yeah probably"

Rolled 10 (1d100)

>>4177088
Well you are boring dudes manifestations and no fun, maybe if I hit my head against the wall harder I'll get something better

Rolled 8 (1d100)

>>4177088
"Anyway, your alternate self is even more of an embarrassment."

File: 1.png (10 KB, 500x500)

10 KB PNG

>>4177090
"Now he's bonking his head against the wall"

"Aaaaall part of the plan"

Rolled 16 (1d100)

>>4177099
"doubt.jpeg"

Rolled 95 (1d100)

>>4177099
>>4177091

Rolled 74 (1d100)

>>4177099
It's all part of the plan. Don't you worry.

File: 1.png (8 KB, 500x500)

8 KB PNG

>>4177101
"Yo, sewer gators are vicious"

Rolled 26 (1d100)

>>4177108
Back to the main story

File: 1.png (10 KB, 500x500)

10 KB PNG

>>4177111
Right right. VP is leading his squad of hacked golems into the mine's golem barracks

Rolled 96 (1d100)

>>4177117
Pssst, act like a arrested criminal VP

File: 1.png (12 KB, 500x500)

12 KB PNG

>>4177119
"Beep boop what is that"

"Beep boop, an intruder. Caught him deep in the mines"

Rolled 61 (1d100)

>>4177137
"Tried to bomb the mines for a message against veganism, beep boop"

File: 1.png (12 KB, 500x500)

12 KB PNG

>>4177140
"One of the most severe of crimes, beep boop. Ready him for termination"

Rolled 86 (1d100)

>>4177145
"We'll bring him there beep boop, also there are more, so prepare to share data on them."
Programming infects the guards

File: 1.png (12 KB, 500x500)

12 KB PNG

Rolled 97 (1d100)

>>4177148
WILL THE HACK BE SUCCESSFUL?!

ROLL 2D100

THE BARRACKS GOLEMS HAVE +20 FIREWALL

Rolled 13, 34 = 47 (2d100)

>>4177151
Bah

Rolled 39, 97 = 136 (2d100)

>>4177151
Fug autofail :DDD
Time for golem battle?

Rolled 94, 44 = 138 (2d100)

>>4177151
Ssssshit

File: 1.png (13 KB, 500x500)

13 KB PNG

>>4177156
>>4177154
>>4177153
"BEEP BEEP BEEP. UNAUTHORIZED ACCESS DETECTED, THESE UNITS ARE COMPROMISED. BATTLE STATIONS!"

Rolled 66 (1d100)

>>4177166
"Beep, look up, vegan supporter"

File: 1.png (12 KB, 500x500)

12 KB PNG

>>4177168
"Beep boop, we won't fall for that one"

Rolled 77 (1d100)

>>4177174
"RAAAAAAAAAAAGH, VEGANS SUCKS"

Rolled 63 (1d100)

>>4177174
Get out VP while the golems are fighting each other

File: 1.png (16 KB, 500x500)

16 KB PNG

>>4177175

"beep boop, the fu--"

Rolled 29 (1d100)

>>4177180
USE THE DISTRACTION TO BEAT THEIR ASSES

Rolled 96 (1d100)

>>4177180
DESTROY

File: 1.png (6 KB, 500x500)

6 KB PNG

>>4177181
A HUGE EPIC FIGHT SCENE ENSUES! GOLEM ON GOLEM VIOLENCE! LUKE GOING BERSERK! VP IN THE BACK HACKING THE SYSTEM IN THE MIDDLE OF A RAGING BATTLE! OH MAH GAAAWD

Rolled 14 (1d100)

>>4177189
VICTORY for the eye

Rolled 86 (1d100)

>>4177189
"AIEEEE WE ARE BEING OPPRESSED BY MEATEATERS BEEP BOOP!"

Rolled 24 (1d100)

>>4177189
Purchase battle cutscene DLC

Rolled 55 (1d100)

>>4177189
Meat is murder. Golems are made to murder. Meat is only logical.

File: 1.png (6 KB, 500x500)

6 KB PNG

>>4177193
BAH GAWD THE VIOLENCE! THE SAVAGERY! THE COMPLETE AND TOTAL CHAOS!

Rolled 3 (1d100)

>>4177209
A short while later...
"We have decided to defect to meat-eater territory, beep boop. And also incest is-."
"VP, what."

File: 1.png (7 KB, 500x500)

7 KB PNG

>>4177211
"SSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHH, SSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. guys, SHHHHHHH. DON'T! Ah, Uh.....OH WOW, MUST BE SOME BUG IN THE PROGRAMMING, HAHA. DAMN ELVES, SUCH SHODDY WORK, AHAHA"

"Beep boop. But sir, you said it was the best, as it puts your sister to the tes---"

"SSSSSSSSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHHHH"

Rolled 68 (1d100)

>>4177223
Moving on, what's the next step of the master plan?

Rolled 60 (1d100)

>>4177223
"Also, shut up, Mr "I bend the knee to every female that so much as breathes in my direction"."

File: 1.png (10 KB, 500x500)

10 KB PNG

>>4177226
"Taking over the barracks allowed me to tap into their system. Most of the golems in the Kingdom are under our control. This should allow us to move through the city and into the cathedral unhindered, Unfortunately, the golems closest to the Elf King and guarding the place are under his direct magical control, I can't access them. But at least I've masked our turned golems' presence. Should give us the element of surprise at least when we burst in the middle of his self fellating session and beat his ass"

Rolled 91 (1d100)

>>4177237
What if we send a contingent to break his magic connection to his magitech?

File: 1.png (11 KB, 500x500)

11 KB PNG

>>4177238
"Well, since he himself is the source and master of the magic in this kingdom. The only way to break his control is to, well, break him. Preferably into multiple pieces"

Rolled 30 (1d100)

>>4177243
Hmmm...I think it's time to make someone a martyr.
Generic Hero, wanna be a true hero?

Rolled 49 (1d100)

>>4177243
I must break him

>>4177243
ok, let's proceed with the plan as intended

Rolled 63 (1d100)

>>4177249
fug

File: 1.png (7 KB, 500x500)

7 KB PNG

>>4177248
Alright Ivan Drago. THe Elf King is yours. Would you lead the troops to burst into the cathedral, cutting a path through the guards with your fists? Or would you ahve them enter first, let the rabble deal with eachother and challenge the Elf King after the nuisances are cleared?

Rolled 73 (1d100)

>>4177261
Let the hero enter first..
Luke, I need you to go up there, dress as a Space Burgers employee, and host an impromptu hidden BBQ for the citizens, we need to waver citizen support for their king.
VP, I need you to stay in the barracks to coordinate golem movement and attacks, and tell them to open a hole to the outside world in the dead end.
Olessa, you're in charge of the reinforcements. I need you to liaise with Director to send up some Greens for repairs and Reds for more manpower.
Time to tell the Chosen One to make sure the hero becomes a martyr.

Rolled 37 (1d100)

>>4177261
Burst into it with everyone and throw myself straight at him with his pants, hopefully only metaphorically, down

File: 1.png (8 KB, 500x500)

8 KB PNG

>>4177266
And so you gave everyone their orders. The Hero is to go in alone and confront the Elf King. Telling him that it would do wonders for the citizens' morale was enough to convince him. You even re assured him that if the worst happens, the USSR army will be sure to bust in and save him at the last moment in a heroic rescue.

Luke will discreetly follow the hero to the cathedral where everyone has gathered. During the commotion he will lure as much people as he can away and feed them meat.

VP will stay and command the hacked golems as instructed. He will send some of them to dig out the tunnel dead end and create another entry point

Olessa will establish comms with our troops back home, she and Director will coordinate the reinforcements.

As for Chosen One...

"So. You want him to die for sure, no matter what happens?"

Rolled 18 (1d100)

>>4177290
If he doesn't die to the Elf King, he dies to either "Space Burger" or a surprise attack by "Lolisniffer"

Rolled 15 (1d100)

>>4177290
Yes~

Rolled 97 (1d100)

>>4177290
precisely

File: 1.png (8 KB, 500x500)

8 KB PNG

>>4177292
>>4177294
>>4177297
"It will be done"

And with that. Thread will be suspended. As it is 2AM and I also need to shit.

Will continue some time this millennia or whatever

Updates b here: https://twitter.com/notapaladin

Quattro
>Is a loser

>>4177302
looks like space burger is suddenly going to have a lot of unhappy customers

>>4177302
Awwww. I kinda wanted to see it he could survive. Then we could dress him up in yellow and start calling him "Useful Quattro".

>>4177441
We could do that after we revive him with necromancy

>>4178001
I like it!

>>4178001
And every time Quattro complains, we can point at Useful Quattro and say "He was willing to die for our plans, can you match that comittment?"

Heck. We don't even need to bring him back. Just dress him up in Quattro's old clothes and open up our fights by throwing his corpse at the enemy! Then insist he was still more useful than Quattro during the fight.

>>4178158
>>4178001
I figure, worst case scenario if Useful Quattro gets destroyed, Quattro lets us start throwing him at enemies when we fight. And we can always mumble discontentedly that our old new Quattro was better than our new old Quattro while doing so.

>>4178162
>Quattro lets us start throwing him at enemies when we fight
You're implying that Quattro's opinion is relevant.

Also already this quest has more characterization than Super Robot Quest 3

>>4178260
Yes, but it's funnier if he ends up letting us do it of his free will.

File: mecha-anime.jpg (57 KB, 492x538)

57 KB JPG

>>4178269
This is a lie though. I love Mecha.

>>4178282
>This is a lie though
He's right though, most of the characters weren't fleshed out, it was just mostly Fester, Edward and Bandit and Fester was heavily disliked in the end

>>4178477
I did not play that quest anyways. I mean, I saw it. I bailed somewhere around mecha ninjas.

I like Mecha, but cowboys and ninjas are lame.

>>4178478
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Uq_TD0_2_1s

>Cowboys and ninjas
cool
>mecha
faggot shit

File: images.jpg (8 KB, 300x168)

8 KB JPG

>>4178520

>13 hours
oh man

>>4178501
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=IsMTpSDAGxM

>>4179001
>>4178501
Adding ninjas to mecha just makes mecha worse.

File: file.png (321 KB, 480x360)

321 KB PNG

>>4179001
>>4179004
as much I like my Patlabor, and actually rewatching it as of lately, you, sir, are a faggot.

>>4179083
I'll suck your dad's dick so hard he leaves your mom.

Which characters would fit each tarot card the most? Currently I've got; Quattro - The Fool and Shotasniffer - The Empress

>>4179004
I hope your taste isn't terminal.

>>4179641
Is there a Weeb card for Marian

File: magician.jpg (36 KB, 300x528)

36 KB JPG

>>4179949
I'm thinking Marian fits The Magician.

>>4179956
Signifying resources right? Yeah that could fit him and his cash.

where's OP

>>4180099
He's trapped. In the crapper

Pay $59.99 to get him out!

Rolled 60 (1d100)

>>4180121
Shoot todd howard, we're not falling for that scam of buying skyrim again

File: 1.png (221 KB, 500x500)

221 KB PNG

>>4180123
Todd Howard? who's this Todd Howard you speak of? I dunno who he is, but he sounds like a guy that sells good products that you should buy

Rolled 18 (1d100)

>>4180135
Tip over the porta potty OP is taking a shit in

File: 1.png (207 KB, 500x500)

207 KB PNG

>>4180137
o fuc

Rolled 58 (1d100)

>>4180154
Get back to the invasion and plot, OP

Rolled 75 (1d100)

>>4180154
you'll be tied to the explosives, now back to the quest