Choose one:>[Mad Science]-Conventional science lacks… Vision. Sometimes the truth is not so easily discovered. Sometimes the limits of human understanding need to be stretched unconstrained by mere safety and ethics. What are a few bodies in exchange for the truth?>[Porcelain Perfection]-Perfection does not exist in the world. Ordinary humans are so flawed… Inferior to even the shoddiest of my beautiful creations. Could a woman have such smooth skin? Could a man have such a chiselled frame? If only they could talk… How sweet they would sound.>[Art of War]- I am a blade and world is my whetstone. Any who oppose me will be overcome directly and indirectly. From every challenge I will grow stronger in the most beautiful art of all.>[Deus Ex]-The human form is weak and limited. What man can escape the fate that awaits every man? No man, but a GOD.>[Faster than Light]-Humanity has lived on this rock for 12,000 years on this marble rock. What awaits us beyond our humble home? Past the craggy slops of mars and the raging storms of Jupiter. What sights will we behold when we venture beyond… Faster than light.>[Beneficence]-People suffer. Sometimes in silence and sometimes out loud. I will ease this suffering, end cycles of hate, tend to the sick and wicked. They need only ask. In the name of the LORD; amen.20 min posting cycle once votes are counted. Votes are combined if non-conflicting.pastebin with rules: https://pastebin.com/kVsjFF9c
>>4553383>[Faster than Light]-Humanity has lived on this rock for 12,000 years on this marble rock. What awaits us beyond our humble home? Past the craggy slops of mars and the raging storms of Jupiter. What sights will we behold when we venture beyond… Faster than light.SPAAAAAAAAAAACE
>>4553383>[Faster than Light]-Humanity has lived on this rock for 12,000 years on this marble rock. What awaits us beyond our humble home? Past the craggy slops of mars and the raging storms of Jupiter. What sights will we behold when we venture beyond… Faster than light.Space
>>4553383>>[Mad Science]-Conventional science lacks… Vision. Sometimes the truth is not so easily discovered. Sometimes the limits of human understanding need to be stretched unconstrained by mere safety and ethics. What are a few bodies in exchange for the truth?
>>4553387>>4553397>>4553403>>4553413Next vote is tie breaker.
>>4553383>>[Faster than Light]-Humanity has lived on this rock for 12,000 years on this marble rock. What awaits us beyond our humble home? Past the craggy slops of mars and the raging storms of Jupiter. What sights will we behold when we venture beyond… Faster than light.It’s space time
>>4553383You. Sasha Sagan-Starbound close your COSMIC JOURNAL with a flourish. Leaning back against your cabbin seat you feel the Hogwarts express shudder gently into motion. The feeling reminds you of the second stage separation of the Appolo command module. You've always wanted to be in one of those. Maybe with some magic?Gazing up out of the window up you can see the ghostly image of Luna. Waxing half-moon. A liminal period of change and advancement a metaphor for your coming into mageho-"EXCUSE ME. Were you even listening to what I said?" an extremely bossy looking girl says while glaring at you.Huh. You didn't even hear her enter.>Introduce yourself normally (boring)>"What did you say?" (boring)>[Faster than Light] ignore girl gaze at stellar object>[Faster than Light] "HAVE YOU EVER HEARD ABOUT THE CHALLENGER DISASTER?!">[Faster than Light] Nice hair it reminds me of the gases around a newly forming proto star.>write-in
>>4553445>[Faster than Light] "HAVE YOU EVER HEARD ABOUT THE CHALLENGER DISASTER?!"This how I always start my conversations
>>4553445>>[Faster than Light] "HAVE YOU EVER HEARD ABOUT THE CHALLENGER DISASTER?!"So I'm assuming it's Early 1986 then?
>>4553468>CHALLENGER DISASTERnope just 1991 autism
>>4553445FUCK YEAH SPACE EXPLOSIONS>[Faster than Light] "HAVE YOU EVER HEARD ABOUT THE CHALLENGER DISASTER?!"
>>4553445The proto star girl cocks an eyebrow and stares at you. Evidently waiting for you to respond. A contest of wills almost like. Yes...You leap up out of your seat and firmly grip her arms to her side like Jupiter gravitational grip on her many moons."HAVE YOU EVER HEARD ABOUT THE CHALLENGER DISASTER?!"She stares at you stunned and rapidly begins to burn red like newly formed dwarf star."O-of course I know about the C-challenger disaster! I know everything there is to know about the challenger disaster!" She nods emphatically before looking away.>Ask her about her favorite part of the disaster.>Tease her (how?)>[Faster than Light] "It was a tragic thing indeed. The lose of lives. Unfortunate. Yet a small part of me envies them. To die in pursuit of the stars... Tell me, RED DWARF, what are your stars?"
>>4553485>>[Faster than Light] "It was a tragic thing indeed. The lose of lives. Unfortunate. Yet a small part of me envies them. To die in pursuit of the stars... Tell me, RED DWARF, what are your stars?"SHE KNOWS US, TELL US MORE OH GIRL OF LITTLE STARS.
making food brb 30min max
>>4553485>[Faster than Light] "It was a tragic thing indeed. The lose of lives. Unfortunate. Yet a small part of me envies them. To die in pursuit of the stars... Tell me, RED DWARF, what are your stars?"
>>4553485>[Faster than Light] "It was a tragic thing indeed. The lose of lives. Unfortunate. Yet a small part of me envies them. To die in pursuit of the stars... Tell me, RED DWARF, what are your stars?"WE'RE HEADED TO THE HOGWARTS SPED CLASSES, BAYBEE!
>>4553485>>[Faster than Light] "It was a tragic thing indeed. The lose of lives. Unfortunate. Yet a small part of me envies them. To die in pursuit of the stars... Tell me, RED DWARF, what are your stars?"What am I WITNESSING?
>>4553485You shake your head in sorrow."It was a tragic thing indeed. The lose of lives. Unfortunate."You slacken your grip on her before continuing.Yet a small part of me envies them. To die in pursuit of the stars... Tell me, RED DWARF, what are your stars?""U-um I-" before she can sputter her answer your interrupted by some snickering boys behind her.The one in the middle appears to be the leader his two rough looking moons orbiting him. Despite his age you can detect a little ice in his COMET like eyes."Glad you put the mudblood in her place!" He smiles. Before his minions push the bossy girl aside and enter your compartment."Pleased to meet you my name is Draco Malfoy, I presume you've heard of me?" he preens. Or at least tries to. The cabin can only fit so many people. Especially due to the presence of such wide satellites. Also you're taller than him.>no u>autisticlly screech at him for interrupting your new friend.>[Faster than Light] "Do not dismiss what you find base. Humanity reached the stars through farts alone.">write in
>>4553547>>write in>That was rude my dude
>>4553547>write inInvite him to talk about s p a c e!(We must think Hermione's name is Mud Blood now. It is kek.)
>>4553547>autisticlly screech at him for interrupting your new friend.THIS QUEST IS AMAZING
>>4553547>autisticlly screech at him for interrupting your new friend.
>>4553573>>4553582You autisticlly screech at him like the ignition roar of a rocket.roll 2d6 higher is better.
Rolled 3, 5 = 8 (2d6)>>4553586
Rolled 4, 4 = 8 (2d6)>>4553586
Rolled 2, 6 = 8 (2d6)>>4553586TO THE STARS AND BEYOND
>>4553589>>4553592>>4553593>Three 8'sIS THIS FATE?!
>>4553595>IS THIS FATE?!F8
>>4553595AUTISM TO SPACE!
>>4553547Your screech is POWERFUL. Malfoy reels backwards from the sheer VOLUME of your voice. His goons TREMBLE in fear. You bask in the moment like a planet with no atmosphere basking in warm rays of solar radiation...The bullies make their way out of the compartment in a hurry. Not wanting to be bombarded by your WRATH for a second time.You help your RED DWARF off the floor and onto a seat before resuming to gaze at the sky. Based on the suns position you estimate you only have 2 hours left of travel before you arrive assuming dinner is at 7pm. "U-um..." RED DWARF mutters almost as quite as cosmic background radiation.You face her.She seems to struggle for a moment bunching her hands before suddenly shouting."YOU!" and running off faster than the original Apollo command module doing a slingshot maneuver.You have 2 hours (time to do two big tasks)>Chase after RED DWARF>Read something (what?)>[FTL] Think about how you can travel faster than light using magic.>write in
>>4553636>Chase after RED DWARF COME HERE, RED DWARF. WE WILL COMUNE UPON MATTERS OF SPACE. >[FTL] Think about how you can travel faster than light using magic.
>>4553636>>[FTL] Think/sketch/plan about how you can travel faster than light using magic.We have a marker in case we need to use the windows for extra writing space, right?
>>4553645+1 SHE CANNOT GET AWAY FROM TALKING ABOUT SPACE THAT EASILY
Alright going to bed be back with FRESH post at around 6:30pm EST tomorrow.Sweet dreams space mages.
>>4553649See you tomorrow, friend
Do Anons have any theories on how to solve the FTL problem?
>>4553815Abuse of anti friction charms
Hey we should abuse Malfoy's perception of us as a lifeblood in order to get spelljammer parts, now the real question is can Malfoy Sr. Import sapient pearwood in the quantity we need.
Pureblood I meant. Oh and here's a pic of spelljammers, I'm thinking sapient pearwood with basilisk bone fittings should do the job, and we can use magic to bind a fire elemental to power it.
And a better pic then that.
>>4553904>>4553903>>4553893These are great, though the magical world knows...nothing of this. Those fools have their heads in the mud, when we look up into the stars. Maybe they need someone to...Set them on the right track?
Quest theme, remember you asked for this qm.https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=4Zbp1A_8xRg
>>4554170Draco is John Madden
>>4554217Umbasa, I like the way you think.
Lets hope our boy never reads a horror scifi
So the plan is to make a spelljammer via pawning off stuff we can get adventuring at Hogwarts and then kidnapping Draco as a princess analog while working as a privateering contract obtained via dracos daddy's shady political contacts, sound about right?
>>4554299I had a bit of a plan, since we have autism and magical power, we're gonna be strange>Aquire resources and workers to build spelljammer through any means possible>Make it legal, in any way possible>Build spelljammers >SPACE The Autistic Astronaut will go down in infamy
>>4554341See this is why we kidnap Draco and Ransom him back for a letter of privateering.
>>4554367Absolutely based: the Law is a concept made by those with no plans to leave; its worthless
What hath I wrot?
>>4554476YOU HAVE GIVEN US THE ONE WHO WILL TAKE US TO THE STARS
>>4554476A very unconventional prologue to a spelljammer campaign.
>>4554476The pinnacle of /qst/
>>4553636You DASH into motion your speedy legs carrying you fast in pursuit of RED DWARF... But not as fast as light. A billion thoughts begin fly inside your mind, whizzing like the Kepler belt. You've never heard of wizards going to the moon. Granted you've only known about the existence of wizards for little over a month. But cases of wizards attempting to reach the moon have been documented at least in your first year astronomy book. All failures for one way or another; something about failure of enchantments. Your astronomy book insists that it's impossible for wizard, and thus, mankind. The FOOLS didn't even know about the muggle moon landing.You will correct this IGNORANCE. But you need FUNDING and LABOR to pierce the void. You resolve to do anything necessary to realize your-. No HUMANITY'S' DREAM!Based on preliminarily research you've only really discovered two methods of magical flight and three means of magical locomotion:FLIGHT1. via a enchantment2. via magic animalMOTION1. Appartation and portkeys2. the Floo network3. enchanted vehiclesNone of these are sufficient to breach the light barrier. This mean either developing a new means of travel or overcoming conventional limitations. Then again you're knowledge may be incomplete.You pause. You get the strangest feeling like your forgetting something...Ah there's a whimpering boy on the ground covered in hasty written SPACE notes. Maybe you wrote those on him?He wimpers. No wonder you used him as a board his spirit is as clear as the void between galaxies. No presence at all. Still niceties have to be observed."My apologies good sir. RED DWARF? Who is this man?"Completely stunned she answers. Like a reflex. "N-Neville. He lost his toad you know!"RED DWARF suddenly frowns and narrows her eyes at you."Hold on a moment. YOU drew on Neville's face! You need to apologize or I'M going to tell someone about it!"She tilts her nose upwards at you. How bossy.>"Tell who?">"I already apologized.">[FTL] "It was a calculated risk. Like the original apollo missions">[FTL] "Did the wright brothers apologize to gravity? Did the SSSR apologize to chimpanzees and dogs? Did Armstrong apologize to moon? I will never apologize for following my dream. ">write-in
>>4554548>[FTL] "Did the wright brothers apologize to gravity? Did the SSSR apologize to chimpanzees and dogs? Did Armstrong apologize to moon? I will never apologize for following my dream. "RED DWARF is smart, but not near OUR VISION or BRAIN. We must explain our BRILLIANCE to her, for our RED DWARF to understand.
>>4554548>[FTL] "Did the wright brothers apologize to gravity? Did the SSSR apologize to chimpanzees and dogs? Did Armstrong apologize to moon? I will never apologize for following my dream. "Some men were born to follow the stars, and others were born to be chalk boards
>>4554548>[FTL] "Did the wright brothers apologize to gravity? Did the SSSR apologize to chimpanzees and dogs? Did Armstrong apologize to moon? I will never apologize for following my dream. "
>>4554548>>[FTL] "It was a calculated risk. Like the original apollo missions"
>>4554548>>4554548ANGER wells up inside you.And then you erupt. Ejecting your RIGHTEOUS response from the corona of your consciousness."Did the wright brothers apologize to gravity?" You take a step towards RED DWARF."Did the SSSR apologize to chimpanzees and dogs?" You take multiple steps forward and RED DWARF quickly looks at the cabin window behind her back and your LOOMING figure."Did Armstrong apologize to moon?" You slam your arms on either side of her head, trapping her, like the event horizon of a black hole. Then like a lone meteoroid trailing through the night sky you deliver your final response."I will never apologize for following my dream. "She suddenly collapses.You get the feeling that this would be a good time to say your catch phrase.>"heh, nothing personelle kid">"omae wa mou shindeiru">write-in (bonus points for AUTISM)
>>4554598>>write-inPer aspera ad astra
>>4554598NOW YOU UNDERSTAND! THAT MY BRILLIANT MIND IS DENSER THAN THE SINGULARITY OF GRAVITY! BEHOLD THE COSMIC JOURNEY UNFOLDING!
>>4554608This is it right here
This is an important choice so i'll give it 10 more minutes before writing.
>>4554607Thisshould be screamed after this >>4554608
>>4554607+1 I think this is better as the catch phrase but I also want to scream >>4554608 at the moment
>>4554598This >>4554608 and then this >>4554607
>>4554598https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WQYN2P3E06s&vl=enYou grip RED DWARFS collar and haul her up."NOW YOU UNDERSTAND! THAT MY BRILLIANT MIND IS DENSER THAN THE SINGULARITY OF GRAVITY! BEHOLD THE COSMIC JOURNEY UNFOLDING!"You throw your arms out in exhalation of the heavens and kneel while looking upwards towards the moon.A dull thud resounds through the cabin."Per aspera ad astra..."..."She's mental she is." The music stops.You glare at the boy with coppery red hair like the dusts of MARS.The other cabin occupant. NO the GALACTIC BLACK HOLE in front of you nods at MARS.Your eyes go wide, your knees go week, palms sweaty.>mom's spaghetti>Introduce yourself casually>Invite to some late night star gazing>write-in
>>4554649>>Introduce yourself casually
>>4554649>Start rapping eminem's "moms spaghetti", because time is relitive to mass and he is the black hole, bending space and time around him to inspire us to sing a song that doesn't exist yet. >Alternitively, make a gravity attraction joke.
>>4554652Just to add some background, we can't always be SPACE AUTIST otherwise it'd lose it's value quickly. We should save it for when something triggers it. Be normal sometime too
>>4554649>Introduce yourself casuallyWhat that anon said about bursts of AutismUnironically, OP, thank you so much for this quest, I'm having a great time :D
>>4554649>Introduce yourself casuallyI agree with the autism bursts and I really like the idea that we can just do a total 180 in our personality from normal to S P A C E and then to normal again
>>4554649>>Introduce yourself casuallyWhat >>4554673 saidA 180 would be great
>>4554652>>4554669>>4554673>>4554675You feel your face heat up. Your heartbeat accelerates like a jack hammer.OH GOD. HE'S LOOKING AT YOU! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaroll 2d6 to not drop your spaghetti (average of 3)
Rolled 3, 4 = 7 (2d6)>>4554680
Rolled 6, 2 = 8 (2d6)>>4554680
Rolled 4, 5 = 9 (2d6)>>4554680We got a crush? Aw, cuteLets make him build space shuttles
>>4554682avg 8 (success) writing.
>>4554649"H-Hey." you begin nervously. Your voice cracks in the end. His PIERCING green eyes dig into yours."N-nice to meet you my name is S-Sasha."Wow that was the smoothest introduction you've ever done!"Erm... Nice to meet you. I'm Harry."God. He's so cute."I'm Ron Weasly!"Ew not him.A moan echos through the cabin.Harry's beautiful eyes widen slightly and he looks at you then at RED DWARF.OH NO! You got into another one of your "fae moods" (like daddy calls them) and bullied her into unconsciousness!...You have a hard time of it but you eventually manage to get RED DWARF up onto one of the compartments seats, her blissful unconsciousness putting you at peace. Now it's just you and Harry...FARTING NOISEWell... it's just you and Harry and RONALD.Talk about.>what just happened>Hogwarts>Your DREAMS>write in
>>4554717>what just happenedWell, this is a fun twist :DLets see if he likes our autism
>>4554717>>what just happened
>>4554717>what just happenedcaptcha hates this quest
>>4554717>>4554717You shift uncomfortably. Before you gather enough courage to look HARRY in the eyes.You IMMEDIATELY regret it. You gaze out of the window. Your heart pulsing like a quasar."Are you ok?" Harry moves closer to inspect your well being. TOO CLOSE!"Wha-Y-yeah I'm cool. Hah like the dark side of the moon.""Really?" RONALD says. "You look really nervous.""W-well yeah I am. It's not everyday you get to ride in the same compartment with an incredibly cu-"."Incredibly famous wizard!" Ron cuts you off with a glare."Y-yeah." you stutter. "A-anyways I really like astronomy and want to go to space one day. Maybe even visit other planets."Ron simply looks at you turns to Harry and says "I told you she was mental."Harry furrows his brow "You know that muggles have gone to the moon Ron?"The stunned expression on his face says otherwise.Your just about to simp for Harry before the door suddenly slams open. It seems that Draco and his two satellites are back for some more. Only this time they've wrapped their scarves around the heads presumably as a crude defense against your AUTISTIC screech.Draco scans the cabin before his eyes rest on RED DWARF. With a snap of his fingers his compatriots push her off the seat onto the ground.>AUTISTIC SCREECH>Attempt diplomacy. Perhaps Prattling with Pompous Draco can secure future funding.>Tell him to leave (how)>Punch him (roll)>write-in
last post be back tomorrow with fresh post at 6:30pm EST (hopefully on time).
>>4554793Oh God, we have to decide between love and funding...Okay, we can make this work. We didn't reach the damn moon without trying! >Attempt diplomacy. Perhaps Prattling with Pompous Draco can secure future funding. Slip in some space references as we talk. Harry knows about the moonlanding, so he's obviously into space as we are! ...right?
>>4554801See you tomorrow OP, this is fun, and we now have a flaw to work around!
>>4554793>>Attempt diplomacy. Perhaps Prattling with Pompous Draco can secure future funding.
>>4554805+1 to this. Holy shit I was gone for work and in that time this went FAR. I can’t wait to see where this goes.
>>4554805+1>>4554801Goodnight QM, loving this quest so far
Rolled 1, 1 = 2 (2d6)>>4554793>Punch him
>>4555264holy shit, my rolls are wack
>>4554793>Attempt diplomacy. Perhaps Prattling with Pompous Draco can secure future funding.Gimme your money bitchQM your quest is based as fuck. I had a hearty chuckle though and though.
>>4554793Draco seems rich. At least the copious amounts of hair gel seem to imply some discretionary income.An idea springs to mind. Perhaps getting on his good side can secure some FUNDS for your DREAM?Daddy always told you that you'd have the men in your life wrapped around your finger when you were older. Whatever that means.Carefully stepping over RED DWARF'S collapsed body and swallowing your RIGHTEOUS ANGER at the sight.You attempt to engage in diplomacy."Greetings, my name is Sasha. I apologize for my previous behavior. Regretfully you caught me in one of my moods. I'm sure you'll find me perfectly amiable now. Perhaps you and your associates would like to sit with us and engage in some light conversation?"Malfoy looks like he's seen life on Mercury."What on earth are you?!" he cries."A human being.""Not THAT. I mean your personality? What on earth are you planning?" he exclaims. "Wait this isn't some trick where we sit down and you scream at us again... Is it?" He finishes while narrowing his eyes at you."No you can trust me just like D-Discovery trusts the structural truss of it's s-service structure." You say while clumsily winking at Harry (like a smooth criminal)."Yes... I know all about Discovery AND structural trusses. I know everything there is to know about Discovery and structural trusses." Malfoy says while grandly gesturing before sitting down and resting his feet on RED DWARF'S not corpse.Both Ron and Harry have their mouths open in amazement at Malfoy's hidden COSMIC knowledge. >Ask him to respect other peoples physical autonomy.>Ask him to respect other peoples physical autonomy. WITH YOUR FISTS.>Inquire about his favorite space mission.>write-in
>>4555728>Ask him to respect other peoples physical autonomy.>Inquire about his favorite space mission.
>>4555731If we're allowed to choose two, lets do this one. RED DWARF is ours, damn it. But we also don't want to lose the funding, so lets try and make that bit a footnote in it, so he doesn't throw a shit
>>4555728>Inquire about his favorite space mission.
>>4555728opps forgot trip
>>4555731+1 I think he has reason to believe that we are in fact a banshee
>>4555728>Ask him to respect other people's physical autonomy.Let's test his knowledge about SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE!!!!!>Inquire about how much he knows about the the space raceAsk how the Moon landing suits were made? (By hand)Did the Soviets or the Americans send the first dog to space, the name of the dog, and if they survived (Soviets, Laika, Died)Name at least 2 of the astronauts that went on the mission, but did not land foot on the moon. (Mike Collins, Dick Gordon, Stu Roosa, Al Worden, Ken Mattingly, and Ron Evans.)Who was the first man to set foot on the moon? (If he gets this wrong, THROW HIM OUT THE AIRLOCK (kick him out of the car))If he doesn't know enough, dismiss the pleb, no funding is better than funding from someone who'll fuck up the mission by making stupid promotional stunts.
>>4555764Fuck yeah, Anon. Lets quiz him
>>4555728"Draco you should respect the bodily autonomy of your peers."His face is stricken but he none the less maintains eye contact "Oh silly me. I forgot about that." but he does not remove his feet from the back of RED DWARF.The sight fills you with RAGE. But luckily your future FUNDING is saved when your future HUSBAND steps in."Get off of her!" Harry says nobly."Yeah. Malfoy." Ron adds with surprising venom.Malfoy sneers. "Dislike my family do you? I know who YOU are red hair and hand me down robes. You must be a Weasly.""What's your favorite space mission?"Malfoy cocks an eyebrow at you."The first one." He replies."Why the first one?" you ask."Because it was important.""Why was it important?"Malfoy's face begins to turn red "B-because it was."How suspicious. You fire off the rest of your questions in rapid sequence like a red hyper giant shedding it's mass."How were Moon landing suits were made?""Name at least 2 of the astronauts that went on the mission, but did not land on luna's surface.""Did the Soviets or the Americans send the first dog to space and name the dog if they survived.""Who was the first man to set foot on the moon?"Malfoy suddenly looks constipated before running away. Satellites in tow.You finally help RED DWARF up onto a seat and sit next to her while facing HARRY.Ron looks at you in amazement. "Wicked."HARRY says "Yeah."The compliment hits you like a 10 foot tungsten rod accelerated to terminal velocity. You pass out through shear excitement.Choose 1:>Malfoy>Harry>RED DWARF>Neville
>>4555785>HarryI cannot put into words how great this MC is
>>4555800Sasha's greatness will take her to the stars
>>4555785Your name is Harry Potter. Glad to be out of the clutch of your aunt and uncle. You are currently riding the Hogwarts express with your new friend Ron and are staring at two unconscious girls. WOW. That came out wrong.Now that you take a a good look at Sasha. She make you feel kinda FUNNY. Like that time you saw your neighbors engaging in NAKED wrestling. Her skin reminds you of chocolate."Should we wake her up?" Ron asks interrupting your daydream."I guess."You try shaking her awake but the moment comes to she immediately faints again for some reason."Forget her you have me!" Ron smiles while putting his arm over your shoulder. Wow who knew that friends were so touchy?Hermione begins to stir."OWWW. Why does my head hurt so much and why do I feel like someones stepped on me?""Err.." You were never good at talking."Oh is cause Sasha played with your body and dropped you. Also Malfoy pushed you while you were unconscious and stepped on you." Ron says with no tack what so ever.Hermione's eyes suddenly go wide and she slowly turns towards Sasha who is leaning on the wall next to her. "EEEK!" Hermione suddenly leaps out of her seat and onto your lap. Ron gives her the stink eye.The door to slides open revealing a porky looking woman pushing a trolley for of what look to be sweets."Anything from the tro-! Oh MY WORD! Aren't you a little young for this? And you with the red hair are you just there to watch? How barbaric at least have the decency to look interested."The door slams shut once more.You feel like a great wrong has been committed.[...]The train halts and the sky is dark. Far from your "home" in Privet drive you can see the stars for the first time like them you feel... Free.You've arrived at Hogwarts. Sasha seems to still be semi lucid. Perhaps Potter should prod her into the present? You tried to get Hermione to do it but she seemed to be muttering something about "being played with" and "forbidden love" and Ron seems offended by the very notion of interacting with the curly haired girl.>Gently shake her shoulders>Slap her>write-in
>>4555848>Gently shake her shouldersPot QM has embraced the autism
>>4555848>Shake her shoulder. When that doesn't work, say 'Moon landing, Cosmic journey' and see if that wakes her up
>>4555848>Gently shake her shoulders
>>4555848Your name is Sasha Sagan-Starbound. Recently you've been unconscious after being complimented by your future HUSBAND.You seem to also recall being shaken awake by him. A look of concern gracing his gentle features, subtle like the tranquil sound of the void.Wait a moment. You're awake. And HARRY IS TOUCHING YOUR SHOULDER WHILE SAYING "MOON LANDING" AND "COSMIC JOURNEY"!!!!!!!!!!!11Thinking at the speed of light you: >pass out>remain calm
>>4555848>Gently shake her shouldersMeta question: Which year is this? It seems like 1st year, but I remember Hermione didn't spend that much time with Ron and Harry on the train, unless its a story change brought through by our auti- Genius.
>>4555898>attempt to remain calm
>>4555898>Remain calm, Don't pass out, you won't remember if he touches you while you fall unconsious.
>>4555903Year 1. Basically she was going around to look for Neville's toad but got scared off/embarrassed by you. She hid in Harry and Ron's compartment where Neville happened to be. You autisticlly drew on Neville scarring him for life and then wall slammed Hermoine into unconsciousness by getting to close. She was just unconscious for the last few posts and forgot about Nevilles toad in the excitement which is why she stuck around.
>>4555907>>4555908>>4555923roll 2d6 average of 3 pass is 8+
>>4555898>remain calmSo, while we're counting the votesWhat house do you guys think we'll be in? I'm thinking either Ravenclaw or Slytherin. Ravenclaw cause>Utter Space knowledge Or Slytherin cause>I will do literally anything to get my dreamWhat do you guys think?
Rolled 1, 4 = 5 (2d5)>>4555932
Rolled 6, 4 = 10 (2d6)>>4555932
Rolled 6, 4 = 10 (2d6)
>>4555934Ravenclaw, we seem pretty innocent outside of SPAAAAAAAACE
>>4555938>>4555939>>4555940avg 8+ writing
Ravenclaw sounds about right. But the idea of a chuuni in hufflepuff makes me want that to happen so badly,
>>4555947I mean, we can make up a good reason for all the houses.>Gryffindor?WE SHALL BECOME THE FIRST OF MANY FEARLESS ADVENTURERS INTO THE STARS!>Hufflepuff?WE SHALL LABOR ON FOR THE GOOD OF EVERY MAN UNTIL ALL MAY SEE THE SEA OF STARS!>Ravenclaw?OUR INTELLIGENCE WILL DESIGN THE MIGHTIEST AND BEST SHIPS TO FERRY MANKIND INTO THE NEW AGE!>Slytherin?OUR AMBITIONS, DREAMS, THEY WILL NEVER DIE! WE WILL REACH THE STARS!
>>4555898You quickly think about earths altered rotation due to the Theia impact. SO elliptical.Dang that calms you down real quick."Sasha? Saaaasha? SASHA!"Huh? Oh yeah your future HUSBAND is shouting at you to get up.Your follow HARRY out of the compartment and onto the station. Glad that he stayed behind to help you.You spot what is possibly the LARGEST man you've ever seen is waving down students."First years over here! First years over here!"Harry evidentiality knows this man as "Hagrid" as he greets him. You absentmindedly wonder if his mother was as large as him as you gaze at the astoundingly clear half moon.You're led with the other first years into a large pier surrounded by sturdy looking wooden boats. Star light streaks through trees that block out the sky."In you go. Only four per boat mind you." Hagrid announces before getting into one by himself.Quicker than a comet you join the boat with:>Neville Ron and Harry>Hermione and some other girls>Draco and his satellites
>>4555974>Hermione and some other girlsIf we have the other girls in our sights, we can make sure they don't get in between the love as inevitable as Earth's orbit around the sun.
>>4555974>DracoCause i ship it
>>4555974>Hermione and some other girlsI don't think we ever got RED DWARF's name IC, we also don't want to cling too hard to harry... yet
>>4555974>Hermione and some other girls
>>4555985We do have her name anon, we gave it to her
>>4555974>>Hermione and some other girls
>>4555974As much as it pains you to part with HARRY. You feel that you might make him uncomfortable by sticking around so much.Draco and his goons rubbed you the wrong way. After pushing RED DWARF twice, interrupting you, and worst of all POSING as a SPACE aficionado .And on the topic of RED DWARF, you do feel a little guilty about dropping her in one of your rants. Thus, gingerly, like the stabilization boosters on the Apollo command modules you scoot into a boat seat beside RED DWARF.Engage apology."Hey Hermione I'm sorry about what happened on the express. It's... Well sometimes I just get in these moods and I... Well, I act a little like a backwards space capsule. I never meant to drop you or anything. Can you forgive me?""I-I suppose I can let it go this time." She declares while tilting her head up and away from you."WOW thanks I thought you hated me or something."Her response is sharp "Never.". "What.""What."The girls in the seats behind you make kissing noises and giggle. Further embarrassing you both.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y2aB_uXLVSAThankfully the boat starts and everyone seems to fall into quite anticipation. Eventually the clearing thins and the as the star light thickens you see the most beautiful night sky in your entire life.Daddy's taken you camping before but the light of those stars was different.Hogwarts, and perhaps your company, makes the stars seem that much more...Magical.As you take your first steps into the magical world a lone tear runs down your cheek."Per aspera ad astra.">Look at... (Who).>Hold hands with Hermione.>Enjoy the moment.>write-in
Back tomorrow with FRESH post at 6:45pm EST.>>4555985who knows how you got the name? ;)
>>4556057>Enjoy the moment.Slow down and look at the stars
>>4556057>Hold hands with Hermione.While we do this; >>4556064As our first fellow space expert (though we admittedly are way ahead), we should enjoy the moment with her. Plus misunderstandings are funny!And Op... you know how I'm gonna take us learning her name, right? We're totally a accidental amateur at legilimency, lol
>>4556057>enjoy the moment
>>4556057>Hold hands with Hermione.
>>4556057>>Hold hands with Hermione
>>4556057>Look at... The stars. Use our vast knowledge of the stars to work out exactly where we are this fucking quest lmao we're a naturally autistic luna lovegood
>>4556057>Enjoy the moment>Use our knowledge of starts to triangulate our positionUse our autism to prove how useful we are
>>4556085>>4556138>>4556145why tf do you guys choose the nsfw option? baka this is a blue board>Hold hands with Hermione
>>4556057>>Look at... (Hogwarts then the stars).>>Hold hands with Hermione.>>Enjoy the moment.
>>4556057The sight of the stars fills your vision. Overwhelming you. Instinctively you fumble around your seat to ground yourself. You palm touches something soft.Hermione lets out a small "Eep!" and tries to slip her hand away but you hold her firm trusting your instincts.As you approach the pier the true beauty of Hogwarts become more apparent to you.You squeeze your hand tighter around Hermione's feeling her warmth.The boat stops at the pier. It's time to get out. For some reason everyone is staring at you.>let go>keep holding on>write-in
>>4556815>let goWell, we've finished sharing the moment.What were they all looking at, anyway? Did something get on our school robes?
>>4556815>Let them goIf school is like prison, we have already established our credentials as the mad dog.
>>4556815>>keep holding on>>write-in (Point to hogwarts using the hand that's holding hermione's then the sky and say" This! is where our journey begins!")
>>4556815Princess carry Hermione.She is now the safety person
>>4556860PfffffffffffffffSure. Fuck it, I'm supporting this now.God we are a complete fey of a child
>>4556815You let go and the rest of your peers turn away. You think you here some snickering.You spot Ron give you the thumbs up, while HARRY, who is beside him is looking down at the ground.Hagrid guilds the group towards the stony base of the castle where you can see a narrow stone staircase carved into it.Hermione is quick to go in front of you as you ascend.You eventually reach what appears to be the castle door's proper. Two massive doors stretching 6 meters high remind you of your cosmic insignificance.Hagrid lifts the massive door knocker.*THUD**THUD**THUD*The doors swing open to revealing a room of intricately carved stone lit by fiery chalices. At the far end you can see a woman atop a staircase who seems who stand like she has a Saturn V rocket stuck in her butt."Well-" Hagrid gestures to the room "In you go."You follow the gaggle as the woman begins to speak in a stern voice."Welcome to Hogwarts. My name is professor Mcgonagall. In few moments you will pass through these doors to be sorted into 4 separate houses. These are Ravenclaw, Slytherin, Hufflepuff, and Gri-"She turns to a loudly sniffling Neville."Young man are you quite alright?""N-no. I lost my toad and some girl drew on me. I-I think I'm SCARRED for life.""Nonsense!" Mcgonagall exclaims before holding out a orange vial "Here, drink this.""WOW! I feel better already!!" Neville cries while twitching sporadically."Oh dear." The professor frowns as Neville begins to take his robes off.Shirtless and pants-less he suddenly leans on Hermione shoulder before saying in the deepest voice imaginable: "Hey.">SCREEEEECH>Let Mcgonagall take care of it>write-in
>>4556874>write-inREEEE KNOCK HIS SHIT IN HE TOUCHED OUR THING REEEEYou can see I'm taking the autistically possessive friendship route
>>4556874>let magonigal deal with itShe isnt harry. And I have no other creative ideas of how to deal with the situation.
>>4556895Autistically possessive has its charms, but I feel like we need more SPAAAACE
>>4556874>Let Mcgonagall take care of it
>>4556903>>4556874Fine. Lets switch >>4556895 to >>4556900
>>4556874>write-inWRASTLEOH YEEEAAAAAHHH BROTHER! GONNA SEND YOU TO SATURN!
>>4556874Mcgonagall jabs her wand in Neville direction causing his body to suddenly seize up then, with a twist, she levitates him with her through the door behind her.Hermione seems to want to cling to you now. How odd?Quick you have a moment of limited adult supervision. What do?>nothing (BORING)>Talk with (who?)>Plan your first "witch on the moon" speech>write-in
>>4556935>Gather BLACKHOLE and RED GIANT together and maybe UGHHH Ron together, if the others want, to give them the mission statement for our time in Hogwarts. TO BE THE FIRST COSMIC WITCH! and friends.>Then bounce first landing speeches off them.
>>4556945Fuck yeah, this anon has the right idea
>>4556945Don't forget about Nevil and his satellites
>>4556935An EXTREMELY good idea pops into your mind. You grab RED DWARF by the hand and lead her to where BLACK HOLE and RONALD are."COSMIC WITCH!" You shout."P-pardon?""Oh MERLIN, she's doing it again. Protect me with your dashing good looks Harry!" Ron swoons."What?""What?"You begin to pace.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2oEFkLZfHcM"For CENTURIES wizard kind has grasped the power of FLIGHT. But in their complacency they have grown ARROGANT and have stopped reaching for the STARS.""Pllllllease" Draco interjects "The Liminal Veil stops all magical phenomena past a certain point. Even ghosts and apparition fail! Every REAL wizarding child knows the story of Barnabas the Barmy!"You turn to face him."Perhaps YOUR tools will fail. Perhaps ALL wizards BEFORE me have failed. But I will not fail. If my tools fail I will make new ones, if my magic fails I will use SCIENCE."You walk towards him."And more importantly I will NEVER give up until the whole world knows that I; SASHA SAGEN-STARBOUND was the first witch to venture... AMONG THE STARS. I SWEAR ON IT!"You throw out your arms look up at the ceiling and shout:"PER ASPERA AD ASTRA""WILL YOU STAND BY ME, RED DWARF?!""U-um." she bites her lip."Ok.""WILL YOU STAND BY ME, BLACK HOLE?!""Sure?""AND YOU RONALD?!""Anything for a fellow queer!""Super-liminal, any speech ideas?""Well you could wear some heels." Ron says "Make yourself even more opposing. OH and some special effects my brothers are experts in that."Interesting maybe he has his uses after all. You look at Harry and Hermione who just shrug.The door leading to the sorting area opens revealing an extremely short man, an ideal candidate for an astronaut, who approaches your year group."Hello, my name is professor Flitwick." He looks at you "I must congratulate your passion. Not many wizards or witches interested in the astral plane these days... Ravenclaw would welcome your dreams with its private library..." He winks at you before continuing to address everyone else:"Professor Mcgonagall seems to have misplaced her calming draught for her Venus potion." He smiles. "The effects on a male are certainly... impressive and something that I can attest to. Hehehe."His cheeks begin redden like RED DWARF and he suddenly coughs."Where was I..?""You were talking about how Mcgonagall gave Neville something to drink, made him stiff, and then made him feel like he was floating." Ron says."That's highly inappropriate Mr.Weasley" Flitwick snaps "10 points from Griffindor.""In the future I expect you to address professors properly by their title.""But I haven't been sorted yet!""Oh PLEASE, you Weasley's all go to the same place anyways."Flitwick then turns around and leads your cohort into a large banquet hall with a sentient hat that can somehow read your mind.You name is called first and the hat now on your head only one question remains:>Gryffindor>Slytherin>Hufflepuff>Ravenclaw
>>4557023>RavenclawMost likely place to recruit future technicians and scientists for the cosmic dream
>>4557023>SlytherinWe will complete our dream. And do anything to do so.
>>4557023>>RavenclawSmart people unite
Still a tie. So going to bed. pls r8. Longer or shorter posts? Longer posts take longer of course but they let me add stuff. On the other hand shorter posts let me post more frequently and also gives more chances for player input.Also here's a meta breakdown of houses:Slytherin: muh connections, muh wealth, very political house, pure and half bloodsGryffindor: Doers and easily convinced with shiny objects and cool speechs. Mix.Hufflepuff: Fluffy house, muh friendship, loyal supporters with strong work ethic. Mix tending towards muggleborns.Ravenclaw: private library, nerds, somewhat antisocial. Mix tending towards halfbloods. Ultimately Sasha can interact with whatever house she likes. It'll just be easier to forge connections with in houses due to house rivalry.Be back at 6:45pm EST tomorrow.
>>4557023Actually I’ll change my vote from >>4557079 to >>Ravenclaw
>>4557097Personally if you could make the posts longer but maintain the current feel of them I would love it, also is sasha a mudblood?
>>4557107You were adopted by daddy. So unknown (for now). Definitely muggle raised though.
>>4557097I’ll vote for longer posts for now, see how that goes
>>4557110Wizard Equivalent of a Wigger then
This is great, I love everything about this. I hope it lasts long enough that we get to see Luna cause she's just gonna feed into Sasha's worst delusions so fucking much. Also if this quest doesn't end with jettisoning Voldemort into the cold vacuum of space I'll be disappointed.
>>4557023>SlytherinBecause being a snake, while also having Gryffindor friends seems so against the rules that it's the best thing I could possibly imagine.
This is a good quest
>>4557097Slytherin. Not all of the green bois are bad, some of them are just autistic.
>>4557487SAY NO MORE>Slytherinaw but Sasha's little gay friend...
>>4557023>>4557097>SlytherinRavenclaw is too obvious that we must rebel against it.Plus there's no way we're giving up our FUTURE HUSBAND so we're automatically the ambassador for interhouse unity (merlin save us)
>>4557023>ask the hat which house is most interested in SPAAAACE, or the one that gives us similar timetables to Harry/Hermione and pick that.>If too bothersome, SlytherinWe shall be a interstellar infiltrator for Harry, it shouldn't be too hard to at least find someone willing to throw at least a bit of money our way, and it'd piss piss hair (draco) off.
>>4557511It pleases me to imagine Sasha as such a wildcard that nobody but her own 'tism can be sure that trying to mess with her won't backfire terribly, making us somehow to best and worst face to the rest of the houses.Because nobody could EVER claim we are like the typical slytherin, but then, nobody can ever claim that meeting the bipolar mad-girl will be a good experience either.
>>4557065Changing to SlytherinLet's see how quickly we can ruin the house with our autismo powers
>>4557023You hear a voice old voice chuckle inside your head."Quite full in here isn't it Sasah?""What do you mean?""It's not everyday that a child is born with gift of foresight and such depth of spirit...""You mean I'm special? Just like the way that the moon is 400 times smaller than the sun yet the sun is 400 times bigger but further away, which results in earth being likely one of the few plants in the galaxy to experience full eclipses?""In more ways than one child. Hush now. Let me sort you..."After a few moments of thought the hat speaks to you again."Hmmm. A thirst for knowledge but only of the unknown, a desire to venture beyond the limits of conventional wizardry. A certain devotion to your friends and lovers..."You feel the hat shift itself on your head."I suppose this will be a good compromise... HUFFLEPUFF will set you on the path to greatness..."You don't know why but your feel HIGHLY uneasy about this choice."Hah I was merely joking! Oh, the emotions running through your heart!"You mentally frown transmitting the worst possible images you can think of. Images of daddy's being disappointed in you."Harder daddy." the hat moans."...""LOOK!" The head ware hastily declares "It's awful BORING being a millennia old hat. The only stimulation I get every year is coming out and reading the minds of 11 year olds! And the rest of the time the portraits in the Headmasters office bully me for not having arms. So I MIGHT be a LITTLE kinky from the isolation. And I might want a BIG STRONG man to chastise me once in a while. Oh, BIG deal!""...""Look just NEVER mention this to anyone okay? ESPECIALLY to any of the portraits around the castle. The rumors alone would kill me in my sleep. Here I'll even sweeten the deal by sorting you into Slytherin like you want even though the blood purists in the house would eat your alive!"Before you have the chance to respond the sorting hat shouts: "SLYTHERIN!"You have a moment before joining your new house mates to say something to the hat.>Invite it for some stargazing.>Show it more mental images of daddy being disappointed in you.>attempt to blackmail it into to letting your friends join you in the same house.>write-in
>>4557762>>4557763>Nicey ask it to please at least consider sorting one other friend into our house, and make a mental note to ask a teacher to let you study the hat, or make up some other excuse to make sure it doesn't go crazy.We could analyze the thought patterns and ambitions of youthful versions the greatest minds in wizarding history if we do this right. Plus it'd just be fun.(Also what's a trip?)
>>4557762>Write in>Show him more images of daddy being disappointed in you to bribe him into sorting our friends into the same houseHe's just given us a big weakness here. If we have to chose one friend then let it be BLACKHOLE but of course we're aiming for all three because who are we to let us be constrained
>>4557783+1, also ask the hat to keep tabs on other kids for us if it can
>>4557783I will support. Even if it says no, then it could be nice to talk to someone who completely understands out thought process.Because really, I don't want harry and the others in slytherin really. It's better if our network spans the schooland >>4557800this is a good idea
>>4557762"Please sort my friends into Slytherin! Mr.Hat." You think quickly while giving him the mental puppy eyes."My enchantments prevent me from doing something like that.""PLLLLLEASE.""Ohhh ok." The hat grumbles out "I suppose the founders did give me SOME autonomy.""But you need to come visit me every other week in the headmasters office and err help me obtain some CHOICE LITERATURE.""Is it something weird?""N-no.""I believe you less then the challenger engineers believed in their O-rings.""Look do you want be alone and crazy like me?""Very well." you nod "We have an accord."At this moment Flitwick removes the hat with a sharp tug. The sudden movement causes him to fall of the high stool he was standing on."OW!" He cries "My tuxedo buttons! I must visit the infirmary at once." He cries dramatically.The old man at the center of the staff table rolls his eyes and motions to a turban wearing professor to resume the sorting.You sit down at the edge of the Slytherin table. Several of the older students appear to be appraising you like a astronomer looking at the spectral lines of a planet. Most of them are frowning at you.>Ignore them.>Greet them (how?).>Stare back at them without blinking (autistic).>Write-in.
>>4557819Combo autism with Greeting!>Wave at them in a jerky, awkward manner, the same way someone with a spinal injury in a bad korean drama would
>>4557827This with some shitty akward space metaphor or something
>>4557819Combine autism with confident greetings. We must assert dominance.>Smile widely without blinking at them and then say "Hello future space entrepreneurs, we shall enjoy our time like Boris Yegorov, Konstantin Feoktistov and Vladimir Komarov did. Together."They were the first team to enter space together, being the 14th through 16th people in space total.
>>4557819>>4557834Support. Full confident autist.
>>4557819The stares of so many people makes you NERVOUS. But you will not back down. Nor will you blotch your first landing speech like Armstrong did."Hello future space entrepreneurs, we shall enjoy our time like Boris Yegorov, Konstantin Feoktistov and Vladimir Komarov did. Together."You say while confidently not blinking.Their frowns deepen. And you notice some of the girls laugh at you."Who are those? Some foreign MUGGLES I expect." A thin looking girl with an pleasantly eliptical face says in a very posh accent."They were the first team to enter space together, being the 14th through 16th people in space total."The girl goes silent and looks back at her peers who whisper something sharply to her. The group glances to the older students furthest from the teachers. You notice a humble yet imposing boy nod at them. Before turning to look at the sorting."M-muggles are far to primitive to have reached the astral plane." The eliptical girl continues in a much quieter voice than before."B-but they have." you voice begins to tremble like the tectonic instability of a newly formed planet Furious a rough looking meteoric looking girl motions for her to move they swap seats. Before she grabs your arm EXTREMELY tightly and whispers angrily:"What do you know? You're just a mudblood. Skin as muddy as your virtue I'll bet. Here in Slytherin we respect our betters so spew any more of that garbage and I'll teach you a lesson. In fact I think I'll teach you one tonight. Meet me in the common room at midnight and don't even think about telling Professor Snape or you'll regret it.">cry a little>cry alot>try to hold it in (roll)>write-in
Okay, so now that Sasha has been sorted into Slytherin maybe Harry won't find the idea so repugnant. I think the only reason he rejected it outright before was because of Malfoy being a git.
>>4557868>write-in>What the fuck did you say about me, you slut? I'll have you know I'm the future first wizarding astronaut, I'm going to go to Mars, Jupiter, Pluto, and my foot to Uranus. You're gonna be like a small asteroid entering the atmosphere; fucking nonexistent. Made copypasta
>>4557868>>4557868>write-in>Attempt to reschedule this tutoring session to the daylight hoursLike we're giving up our prime stargazing hours to mess about UNDERGROUND. Whatever mystic knowledge she wants to impart can wait till the sun is up>>4557875Hopefully the hat will nudge him in the right direction
>>4557882Okay, misunderstanding it is better. Less go
>>4557868>Laugh at her for considering herself our better when she doesn’t even know a thing about space and then proceed to spout out an extreme amount knowledge at her about the history of human space travel
>>4557887Right? I bet this bitch doesn't even know the 4 fundamental forces.
>>4557887Yes, flex the space knowledge.
>>4557885>>4557882>>4557887>>4557891>>4557902>>4557903In case it wasn't clear Sasha (an extremely sheltered girl) is well aware of her current situation due to the extreme venom in the girls voice and her painful grip on her arm. Thus any reaction other than crying requires the two following checks:Roll 4d6 first two are to maintain composer and the last two are to rebuke under stress.Average of 3 rolls for both. An 8+ is a success.Also I need a consensuses on what to say. (Captcha hates me).
Rolled 4, 6, 4, 5 = 19 (4d6)>>4557909Random bullshit go!
Rolled 5, 5, 1, 5 = 16 (4d6)>>4557909rollin>>4557887this
Rolled 4, 1, 5, 5 = 15 (4d6)>>4557909
Rolled 4, 4, 5, 3 = 16 (4d6)>>4557909
>>4557911Oh wait, they add up!
>>4557911>>4557914>>4557917Composer roll: passRebuke roll: passbrb in 10 min while I get some grub.
I can't wait to get to our first test flight and using "Squabber" as our test pilot.
>>4557868Envisioning the vastness of space and imagine to tossing out your feelings of fear.(+1 to composure rolls in the future)https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NFjE5A4UAJIYou begin to laugh.The meteor girl scowls."Something funny MUDBLOOD? Finally realize how STUPID you sound."Expecting this you EXPLODE."It all began in 1957 when the USSR and the United States of America announced that they were putting satellites into orbit. Competition was fierce in those days and soon the first man-or should I say MUGGLE made object, the Sputnik 1, was put into SPACE".You continue oblivious to the fact that your new seat mate is beckoning you to stop."Then, the first living being, Laika the dog was launching into obit in 1957. Laika was then followed by Yuri Gagarin the first COSMONAUT in 1961. Valentina Tereshkova was the first woman in space in 1963. Has wizard kind fared better?""W-we're superior to muggles." meteor stutters loosing her grip "W-we live longer and have magic.""And yet is was once again muggles who landed on the moon in 1969." You rebuke. "Once again muggles who reached the orbit of the moon in 1968 before gracing it's surface in 1969. It was muggles who first gazed at the far side of the moon. It was muggles who have a space station orbiting earth this very second!"You gently grip both of her arms and look at her impact marked face."You have very little to teach me..." you pause a little thinking about what else to add. Then you remember your catch line.Her eyes tear up a little."Per aspera ad astra... BITCH." you say while looking upwards at the enchanted ceiling. SIRIUS twinkles. And her confidence crinkles. Superluminal. You could spend all day here.>BLACK HOLE>RONALD>RED DWARF>Neville>Draco>??????
ending it for today be back on SATURDAY at with fresh post 6:45pm. Will be here for some questions if anyone wants to ask.
>>4557988>??????SASHA IS AN AUTISM GOD THAT IS GOING TO THROW SLYTHERIN INTO ORBIT
>>4557988>??????Love this shit so much lmao
>>4557991When is this set exactly? Like 1999, 2003... I don't remember what date it was in the books. Also>???????
Qm is asleep, post spelljammers
Ring ships are the best
>>4557988I would like it to be Draco as much as not, but the mystery box calls.>?????We shall not be bullied nor suffer under your deluded misconceptions of earthbound superiority, grounding.
>>4557868So in he slytherin hierarchy, that imposing 4th-6th year would be the man calling the shots, possibly a prefect? Then organised into the usual clique and groups.But their attempts at intimidation have failed, so I suspect they are going to back off for a while, then try coming in with a new strat.And of some note, at least we know we are not muggleborn. Slytherins decree was pure or half bloods only, no muggle born at all in his house.
>>4558111Earthnoids, so fucking smug til we drop some rods from God on em, we as proud spacenoids shall not suffer their bullshit.
>>4558130Come to think of it, which classes do you think will hold our attention?I'm personally of the mind that charms will keep us hooked once we figure out that's how levitation is preformed.Astrology is a no brainer
>>4558132I'm of the same mind, we're gonna need the mind arts and rune mastery to operate the spelljammer though.
>>4558132Also we scribbled maths all over Neville, so arathmancy too I'm gonna guess.
>>4558143It wouldn't suprise me if our tism made for a psudo-occulimans [the mind shielding art]>>4558145Mathmatics are required for space flight, so we should be decent at it.
>>4558146All you get when you try to read Sasha's mind is the 2001 Stargate scene
>>4558158Just an endless stream of space facts, Voldemort loses one of his unforgivable curses due to mental infection. Instead of the killing curse, he now casts "Why muggles outpace wizards achievements in the astral plane, a 6 page thesis"
>>4558119well, no not really. muggles can also be in the house, but they're very rare. ehem.Muggle-born Slytherins exist, but are very rare, as noted insultingly by Scabior the Snatcher. "There have also been definite examples of half-bloods sorted into the house, including Tom Riddle, Dolores Umbridge, and Severus Snape. Also, pure-bloods are not automatically placed in Slytherin." - google
>>4558181goddamnit my autism
>>4558181Forgive me if I'm wrong, but I could have swore that there were three sets of "blood purity" in HP.Pureblood, 2 magical parents.Half blood, 1 magical parentMuggle born, No magical parantage, typically dormant or recessive magics.Ie, Harry/Ron, Snape/Tom, Hermione/some other fuck.Half bloods and Pure bloods can go into slytherin, but not muggle born.
Why Sasha wants to fugg Harry?Is it a protagonist thing?
>>4558184She's a sheltered girl and Dan Raddy is a looker. Nothing more complicated than that.
>>4558184i wonder why too, perhaps she has heard about "The boy who lived"
Some of these write ins are so cringe, I liked the idea about pc being seemingly normal, maybe even boring, then doing a complete 180 sperg out when something anything even remotely contains something space related and harry
>>4557988>>??????WHATS IN THE BOOOXXXX?!
>>4558275Cant cringe if you are having fun. Unless you enjoy watching people get hit in the balls.That being said, the model has merit, but I prefer to keep up the crazy or at least use it in times of stress.
>>4557988>>??????Never deny a mystery box
>>4558409I bet 2 golden stitches its Snape come to see what trouble we are causing
>>4558410>Snitches autocorrects to stitchesThat's funny.
>>4558183no, muggles can, its just that my formatting autism forgot to include the former part of the paragraph.Muggle born Slytherins exist, as it says on my post, but are very rare. You can go search on google to verify what I said, anon.
>>4558119what >>4558181 said>>4558183sorta. Purebloods can trace their magical heritage back at least 3 generations i.e. 8 magical great grandparents, 4 magical grandparents and 2 magical parents.Otherwise yes you are correct.>>4558184reasons that you may soon discover
>>4559557My mistake then. I though "muggleborn" was ONLY muggle parents.While half blood were any magical relatives in their past 3 generations, and pure bloods are given as you described.But it seems I was mistaken.
>spend nearly an hour writing a post.>accidentally close browser>>4557988Your name is LORD VOLDEMORT. The greatest sorcerer alive. Currently you are possessing some hapless fool in order to get the philosophers stone located in Hogwarts. Reportedly anyways.Your own sources seem to have verified the information but even in the event that this is a trap by your old transfiguration teacher even a minuscule chance that the stone by kept here would be worth the return. To say nothing of the plentiful unicorns that roam the woods and the young boy responsible for your current state...Speaking of which your puppet is currently reading his name..."H-harry P-p-potter"The room is silent. Fury courses through your veins. You know that the boy did NOTHING to defeat you that night. The only odd thing you remembered that night was the faint feel of a queer kind magic in the air as your killing curse soared towards him. You deduced that whatever had happened must have been some sort of sacrificial magic powered by the death of his mother. But you've KNOW rituals. A single human life does not block the killing curse. But what could? You take a moment to glance into the boys eyes. Sending a subtle leigamacy probe. Oh how you LONG to destroy his fragile mind. You wouldn't want to blow your cover, not yet.You find very little of worth. Middling intellect and a childish infatuation with some girl. Yet something about him reminds you very much of yourself. How odd.The small, frail and otherwise unassuming boy takes his seat and your puppet lowers the hat."SLYTHERIN."The hall breaks out in whispers. And the Slytherin table slowly begins to clap as the boy sits himself awkwardly beside his crush who appears to be having a conversation of her own. Abesntmmindly you send a probe out to the next sortee. Ah, a Weasly. He seems to be imagining himself being spooned by THE BOY. You cringe breaking the probe immediately.The only other minds you read is your chief litutenets son who... Seems to be in denial about some girl he likes.By Sithrack! Is this all that children think about?!Disgusted you pay no heed to the sorting of the other children . Deciding that LORD VOLDEMORT has little time for raiding the minds of 11 year olds. Though you wouldn't mind to see inside old COUGARS like Mcgonagall...The sorting is now over. And the feast has begun.Potema Sprout seems to believe your puppet as some kind of basket case on account of his insufferable stutter. And is currently massaging his upper thigh under the table while insisting that he "come to her if he was ever in need or wanted something.".HAH like he could ever need anything with the worlds MIGHTIEST SORCERER as his master! >excuse yourself to go to the infirmary (for COUGAR watching)>excuse yourself and go test the defenses of the stone.>write-in
>>4559946>excuse yourself to go to the infirmary (for COUGAR watching)So LORD VOLDEMORT has a thing for MILFs? Also Harry in Slytherin this is gonna be a giant mess isn’t it?
>>4559946>excuse yourself to go to the infirmary (for COUGAR watching)ay you're a Slytherin Harry. hahaha Snape's gonna be fucking thrilledAlso>Sasha likes Harry>Harry Likes Sasha>Ron likes Harry>Draco likes ????? (totally Sasha)All we need now is Ron to follow his heart and get into Slytherin and we have a real love square brewing. The power the dark lord knows not is teenaged hormones driving him insane.
>>4559946>>excuse yourself to go to the infirmary (for COUGAR watching) Lord Voldy, professional poon hound
>>4559963She's some sort of emotional leech, betting money on it.Or kids haven't learned the honey-trap yet, never stick your dick in crazy
>>4559999>emotional leechOr she's just a qt and everyone is 12 and discovering hormonesHarry's super sheltered so it makes sense he'd get a puppylove crush on the first cute girl he sees. If Draco's also noticed we're cute then it makes sense he's having a crisis right now because he knows we're damn crazy.I'm interested to see if Sasha's crush on Harry is because he's cute (plausaible because he's got that Dan Radcliffe faceclaim) or if it's something more insidious.
>>4559946>excuse yourself to go to the infirmary (for COUGAR watching)
>>4559946"Come my puppet. Let us adjourn to the infirmary.""W-why Master?" You puppet thinks to you.You send a jot of pain through his mind."Because LORD VOLDEMORT demands it."He wimpers which seems to only entice Sprout more."Oh my professor! Its seems that your in some sort of pain. Perhaps I can help you UNLOAD?" She says while pressing her grossly large bosoms on your puppets arm."T-that's quite a-alright p-p-professor. I t-think it's my only stomach i-injury from A-albainia""You POOR THING." Sprout coos before placing her soft hand on your puppets lower stomach.Impatient you send out another jolt of pain causing your puppet to flee and hopefully is all the convincing Quirrell quickly quits any quackery with Potema Sprout. After some VERY FAST running your puppet reaches the infirmary doors and creaks the massive things open.Only to find Flius Fitwick hunched over a black cat. With a look of ecstasy on his face being rapidly transformed into mortification."...""..."Now you have witnessed many heinous things as a DARK LORD. You've personally eaten infants in front of their parents for fun. But even you will admit that there are some things that are simply off limits.You first instinct is to obliviate yourself and Flitwick of this memory. But then you get an EVIL IDEA."P-pleasant c-company eh Filus?"Filus blinks in confusion unmounting himself before squeaking out "Y-yes it is isn't it. Um. I suppose that we should both be on our way...""P-perhaps I can forget about what I've seen today.""Really?!" he squeaks easily taking the bait in the middle of dressing himself."Y-yes. J-just tell me about your little friend here." Your puppet says while cleaning the cat with a wave and levitating it near an open windowsill."Please Quintuis! Not Minerva!"----------Your name is Sasha Sagan-Starbound. You close your COSMIC JOURNAL with a flourish having recorded all the important HAPPENINGS of the day. Your room is a stylish GREEN and has most of the functionality of your own room. You find it odd how everyone you met on the train all ended up being sorted into the same house. But chalk it up simply due to sheer chance.You still have some time before you go to bed. >Talk with HARRY>Talk with Hermione>Talk with Ron>Talk with Draco>Write-in.
>>4559946>excuse yourself to go to the infirmary (for COUGAR watching)Lord Voldemort and the quest for Cougar Pussy
>>4560057Always late to the party!>>4560055>Write-inAnnounce to our Intelligence-lacking housemembers that we will attempt to instill some knowledge of SPACE and THE OBJECTS AND TRAVEL OF SPACE so we can actually stand these people
>>4560066sure. Do that with.....Draco and Harry. Make them stand eachother, because it amuses me.
>>4560090>>4560066Kek supporting with Draco and Harry. For for FUNDING and the other for HUSBAND reasons.
>>4560055You get Hermione and ask her to tell Ron to get all the bois. Mostly because you don't think that you can face HARRY after you ignored him to DESTROY meteor with facts and logic. Sure you might have gained SPACE CRED but you don't want HARRY to think you only care about yourself or something.Eventually Ron comes back with HARRY. Who is in delightfully baggy cloths. Very grunge. And very CUTE."We tried to get MALFOY to come but he just wouldn't. Good riddance I say.""Erm. Ron why are you talking like that?" HARRY handsomely says."B-because I want to! N-not because I feel inferior to him in manners and class or anything."Hermione rolls her eyes "Boy's." before latching onto you.Harry looks DEEPLY uncomfortable. >continue the meeting without Malfoy>get Malfoy>write-in
>>4560113>Get MalfoyMotherfucker, you will learn about space and LIKE IT!After the lesson on space, switch to talking about magic. That should let Malfoy flex his "better than you" muscles and let us figure out how to make magic rockets.
>>4560117+1Assert dominance as the alpha of this group by making sure that nobody can skip space tutoring
>>4560113>get MalfoySPACE beckons MALFOY. You will surrender your FUNDING to the cause.>>4560117Also this. Something something ego massage
Remember Harry's wealth stash guys, plenty of funding there if needed.
>>4560132Bold of you to think their mutual discomfort is not payment enough
>>4560132Harry's wizard dollars are probably locked up in trust whereas all Draco needs to do to get cash is send a message to daddy.Plus the real FUNDING is the frenemies made along the way.
>>4559999>tfw your hidden demon eye is from a succubus
>>4560113THIS. WILL. NOT. DO.You fling Hermione off you arm like the Saturn V discarding it's boosters and zoom your way towards Draco 's room.You knock."Draco "You knock."Draco "You knock."Draco "The door opens. Revealing a tired looking Malfoy."What do you want?" Draco spits before sneering "Gertrude?"You feel your face grow hot. "S-Shut up.""And what are YOU going to do about it?" He says while cocking an eyebrow.Angrily you grab him by the (very thin) wrist and drag him to the common room. At first he attempts to resist before submitting to your superior strength to embarrassed to shout for help.You let him go before gesturing to an empty spot beside the sofa that HARRY and Ron are on. He resignedly sits.Hermione and Ron seem to be sulking and glaring at Draco for some reason. HARRY still seems very uncomfortable.You begin your lesson."Welcome. Thank you for coming to space lessons with Sasha Sagan-Starbound.""Like I had a choice.." Malfoy grumbles ungratefully."Shut up MALFOY." Hermione and Ron say simultaneously. You feel pretty good as Draco wilts a little under their homogeneous glare."As I was say-""Sasha!" Hermione whines "I lo-like you but I just can't stand Malfoy. He's been really mean to me...""Yeah Sash!" Ron says "We sisters should teach him a lesson." He says while snapping in a "Z".You look at HARRY."Erm, well he did never apologize for pushing and stepping on Hermione."Malfoy looks furious."Is this what you've come to do SMITH? Drag me here to mock and bully ME? Heir to the Malfoy Fortune? Wait until my father hears about this! You'll be expelled before you can say "mudblood"!".>try to calm him down (what do you say?)>let him rant>SLAP HIM>write-in
>>4560167>what the fuck is a mudblood?
>>4560184Yeah, lets do this. Wtf is it anyway? Someone who has earth in their blood, so they'll always stay there?
>>4560188>ask malfoy what a mudblood is>he (or ron) explains it>give the counter-definiton >>4560188 mentioned>malfoy's face when he's the real mudblood, soilbound and too grounded to even desire space travel>the alt definition catches on and classically douchey slytherins become targets to it>tfw we reclaimed a slur
>>4560193support: SET AUTISM THROTTLES TO OVERDRIVE
>>4560193+1Not even the first day of school and we are already starting to reclaim slurs
going to bed. be back tomorrow with epic post @ 6:45pm sweet dream my autistic astronauts.
just randomly found my way in here, good stuff. btw, it always bothered me how the books lacked a sympathetic Slytherin character. not enough ambiguity.
>>4560193yes, all my yes
>>4560193I'll support, but I think we should add something to the mix to the effect of"The dream of spaceflight shall never be achieved with this earthbound blood thinking. If any of you desire to remain upon this ground as Soilblooded groundlings, you may go back to bed.Now Malfoy [space name required], I asked for you because you know more about about magic than the rest of us yes? So how do we get to space with it!"use the new definition to ask if they have a problem working together, then just sorta "alpha nerd" ourselves into keeping the peace by assuming they will and challenging them to prove us wrong first.
>>4560278Slughorn? He was as close to a 'good' slytherin as you could get.>>4560607to repoint, don't call Malfoy a mudblood to start. Feeding his idea of being bullied will just drive him away.
>>4560167"What is a "mudblood" anyways?" You ask abruptly interrupting Malfoys rant."It's a mean word Ron says. The worst thing you can say to a muggle born. SOME PEOPLE" Ron glares at Draco " think that muggleborn are inferior to purebloods because their great grandparents aren't wizards. A load of rubbish if you ask me sista!"You glance at Draco who, after a moment, nods."As much as I loath to agree with this... Person. I concore with his definition. Though I must mention that muggleborns have repeatedly failed to adapt to wizarding society and more often than not support backwards social policies and meddle in affairs which are better left to those who understand. Not that I can fault them they are simply too ill tempered and coarsely bred to consider the impacts of their unclothe behavior. That wizards are superior to muggles is without question as is the dilution of magical blood due to "outbreeding". At the current rate magical society will collapse in 4 generations.""WOW Ron I thought mudblood meant that you had earth in your veins and were too grounded and narrow minded to consider space travel." you say completely ignoring Draco."You said it sista!"You lock eyes with Draco causing his face to flare like a cornoa."The dream of spaceflight shall never be achieved with this earthbound blood thinking. If any of you desire to remain upon this ground as Soilblooded groundlings, you may go back to bed.Now Malfoy, I asked for you because you know more about about magic than the rest of us yes? So how do we get to space with it!""I have no desire to associate with you or drag MY reputation into the mud SMITH. You can offer me very little. And just so you know I RESENT your insinuation." Draco says while standing up.>"ok mudblood">punch him>attempt to lure him back (how?)>write-in
>>4561365Let’s convince him that if he can make it to space he’ll be the most superior wizard on the planet— as much as his attitude sucks, our vision lacks funding
>>4561374+1 I mean think of all the PRESTIGE he will get as being one of the first wizards to go FASTER THAN LIGHT
>>4561374>>4561410>>4561423roll 2d6+1, avg of 3, 8+ is success.(+1 for appealing to his nature)
Rolled 5, 1 + 1 = 7 (2d6 + 1)>>4561425
Rolled 6, 6 + 1 = 13 (2d6 + 1)>>4561425
>>4561486>2 critsI'd say we have a silver tongue, but I'm pushing for a golden one
>>4561481>>45614861 more role.
Rolled 6, 2 + 1 = 9 (2d6 + 1)>>4561425
>>4561471 (7)>>4561481 (6)>>4561492 (9)avg 7.33<8Fail, writing.
>>4561490Board is so dead that I didn't think anyone would notice... forgive me if I wanted our autist protagonist to get $$$$
>>4561365"Draco lets-""NO."You think that it's time to cut your losses. Draco didn't seem to be in the best mood. There's always tomorrow morning.[Persuasion lvl 0]->[Persuasion lvl 0]1/4"It's ok Sash you don't need him you don't need any man! Besides I know plenty about muggles and magic! My dad's the head of the Misuse of Muggle Artefacts Office." Ron says."Well I suppose we should get this lesson started..." you say.Hermione raises her hand and you beckon her to speak."Well. I was just thinking that if we want to learn about how to go to space we should have a NAME for our organization. I was thinking "Liminal Outer Veil Research and Exploratory Society" or LOVERS for short." she blushes while looking at you.>ok>no way fag (write super popular name for your organization)>write-inalso give me a 2d6 roll for teaching avg of 3, 8+ is a success. Failures now reward levels in respective skill with (4 failures needed to gain +1) each skill level adds +1 to relevant rolls.
Rolled 5, 4 = 9 (2d6)>>4561518>ok
Rolled 3, 1 = 4 (2d6)>>4561518>I'd prefer S.P.A.C.E!There is no meaning to these letters.
>>4560609that's true, Slughorn counts. still, all the students were bros and thots, which I found off-putting.
no 3rd role so going to bed. Not alot of people today so in the future I'll take today and Friday off. See you later double A's. Be back with post tommorow at 6:45pm
>>4561518>no way fagfirst ron now this bitch, miss me with that
Isn't 8 a bit high for an average? I get that Bo3 is a bit imbalanced in favor towards the players, but averages kinda suck, especially since the lowest roll is 2 and the highest is 12, making 6-7 a more middle-ish option.
Rolled 3, 1 = 4 (2d6)>>4561877Rolling.
>>4561877I never liked averages either. It means that all players must roll well, lest we fail
Rolled 4, 4 = 8 (2d6)
>>4561537Supporting. Plus, I want to see if we can come up with a name later
>>4561898>>4561877same; we need another chance to acquire funding
Got home late. Writing now. >>4561877>>4561898I'll address this after I post
>>4561531 (9)>>4561537 (4)>>4561878 (4)avg 5.66<8Fail.
>>4561518"How about we hold of on naming for now?" You say being torn between L.O.V.E.R.S and S.P.A.C.EYou finally start you lesson on SPACE. However since you have very little experience teaching and no lesson plan the whole thing just devolves into you lecturing them about esoteric trivia.[teaching lvl 0]->[teaching lvl 0] 1/4At the end of the session they all look mentally exhausted. HARRY speaks up as everyone is leaving "Er... Thanks."The impact of his compliment sends you mantel into flux. Luckily you still remain conscious."Haha it's n-nothing for someone as s-smart as me. Would-would you like to look at the s-stars and stuff later on?" You say smoothly like the surface of a water glob in 0g.Harry's breathing hitches and he turns his head to look off behind you."Y-yea-" His eyes suddenly grow wide and his face goes pale like beautiful luna on a cloudless night.Hermione suddenly slings herself over your arm."Come on Sasha its time to go to bed. You must be tired after the lesson." She says quickly while leading you back to your room.You wake up to find that all of your clothing is gone. Like everything.>PANIC>just go to breakfast in your pajamas (composure check)>write-in
>>4562386Steal someone else’s clothes.
>>4562397Supporting.If it's the nargles again I'm gonna lose it
>>4562397+1 Can’t have shit in Slytherin
>>4561877So the way I see it is that the median on a 2d6 is a 7 and I only call for rolls when you are attempting to do something difficult or beyond your skill level it reasons that someone untrained would fail most of the time at a difficult task.So you're right that the success threshold is unfair in that regard. However you actually have 1/6 chance to roll a 7 and a 4/9 chance to roll a 6-8 on a 2d6 since it's rolls follow a normal distribution.The way to get roll bonuses (or not even roll at all) is through the use of situational bonuses. So preparation, having the right equipment, taking advantage of a weakness or situation, being hopped up on potions. ect. I'll add +1 or even +2 to your roll total for EACH of these conditions satisfied. This is favorable to players since roll results follow a normal distribution. for example a +2 would ensure a 3/4 chance of success and 1/4 chance of a crit.In short the current system rewards big brain plans and prep. When you fail I usually give you some kind of hint as to how you can do better. I actually have a lot of stuff you need to read between the lines to get.I'll switch to BO3 if there are still complaints but I urge you to try exploiting this system first.
>>4562386You attempt to barge into a random girls room in an attempt to steal their clothing. Almost all of them are locked. Except for one at the end. For some reason it feels like the moment right before a supernova.>enter>do not enter
>>4562412>do not enterNah obvious trap is obvious. We've got a bonus on our composure rolls so I say we just go to breakfast
>>4562404Ah, that makes sense. Carry on then.>Do not enter.
>>4562412>do not enter
>>4562416>>4562421>>4562433>>4562439>>4562442>>4562453Next vote is tie breaker.
>>4562466>do not enter
>>4562412You choose not to enter instead electing to go to breakfast in your pajamas.You spot Hermione by her door looking dressed and stressed. Her hair is even fuzzier than usual. "Are you ok?""Sasha!" She exclaims while beginning to hyperventilate. "It's terrible! SomeonelockedmydoorandnobodycametohelpmeeventhoughiwasscreamingforhelpandnowI'mgoingtobelateonmyfirstdayhogwartsinslytherinandeveryonesgoingtothinkthatI'manogoodmudblood!"Wow she has great lung capacity! With some physical exercise she would make a great astronaut. Ah you should calm her down first."Hermoine." You say while gripping her shoulders and looking her in the eyes "CALM DOWN"She goes a little too calm as she flops onto the floor unconscious. You gently attempt to shake her awake only for her to pass out again. Finally after the 5th try she comes too. For some reason this seems very familiar to you."AH. Um s-sorry I guess I got a little to e-excited.""You were exited about being late?""No I was excit-wait... AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaaaa!""RED DWARF! YOU ARE MINE SO STOP FLAILING ABOUT LIKE A ROUGE PLANET AND COME WITH ME FOR BREAKFAST!"She stops panicking for some reason.You head down to the common room only to find your clothing slewn about. A girl with a short bob cut seems to have a pile of them in her arms.>PUNCH HER>"what are you doing?">just grab what you need change and get to potions>write-in
>>4562503>just grab what you need change and get to potions>Let her know she can just leave our stuff piled in our room once she's done picking it up and that we're very appreciative of her efforts.
goign to bed 6:45pm tommorow. yahfda
>>4562503>>just grab what you need change and get to potionsI wonder how our autismo powers will affect shape
>>4562503>Slap her ass>just grab what you need change and get to potions
>>4562503>just grab what you need change and get to potions
>>4562738this is such a coombrain move. I support
>>4562738Fuck it, support
>>4562503>>just grab what you need change and get to potions
>>4562738>slapping her assThe fuck kind of Akun bullshit is this
>>4562738How do I negative support an anons action because yuck Sasha would never
>>4562503You grab what's needed for the day and begin changing quicker than a comet.While changing you catch a glimps of the girls behind. You begin to feel curious. What does is feel like? Is it like yours? Why is it so round?Unable to resist the allure you SLAP her butt. It's very soft.... You feel like you've done something TRULY AWFUL. Like sending a kilometer sized asteroid onto primordial earth. The girl pauses her gathering and drops all the clothing she is carrying on the ground stares at you intently and leaves the common room while slamming the door with a bang that seems as loud as the ignition of a rocket.Hermione keeps looking at your hand for some reason, but eventually stops, and helps you gather the rest of your clothing. 10 minutes later you begin fumbling in the direction of where your think potions class is.Luckily potions class is close by so even though you have no idea where it is you and Hermione stumble across it through sheer chance. Even so you are the last people to enter. Just as you and Hermione sit down. Professor Snape bursts though a door by his desk cloak billowing behind him like the dust of an Ice comet."You are here to learn the subtle science and exact art of potion-making. As there is little foolish wand-waving here, many of you will hardly believe this is magic. I don't expect you will really understand the beauty of the softly simmering cauldron with its shimmering fumes, the delicate power of liquids that creep through human veins, bewitching the mind, ensnaring the senses. . . I can teach you how to bottle fame, brew glory, even stopper death — if you aren't as big a bunch of dunderheads as I usually have to teach.""Potter! What would I get if I added powdered root of asphodel to an infusion of wormwood?""I don’t know, sir." said Harry."Tut, tut – fame clearly isn’t everything.""Let’s try again. Potter, where would you look if I told you tofind me a bezoar?""I don’t know, sir.""Thought you wouldn’t open a book before coming, eh, Potter?""What is the difference, Potter, between monkshood and wolfsbane?"This can't continue he's bullying your future HUSBAND! How do you rectify this COSMIC injustice?>say that you haven't read anything about potions either>say nothing>write-in
>>4563383>Autistically blabber about the composition and manufactoring of rocket fuel
brb 2 hours
>>4563383>There's no difference between monkshood and wolfsbane, they're both names for Aconitum. C'mon, your mom taught you this.
going to bed. Be back tomorrow same time.
>>4563598Good Night, Pot! Sleep well!
>>4563383>say nothing for now, if snap continues bullying:Give a answer that is completely right, yet utterly wrong"Monkshood is the same thing as wolfsbane, but they have different name's because the first people to discover them would use it to get high by hiding it in their hoods after crushing it, and only later was it discovered wolfs would throw up violently because, uh, proteins and lipids."(Am I posting too much stuff in one go?)
>>4563383You suddenly stand up."There are many different kinds of rocket fuel but they can essentially be divided into two types liquid and solid.""Smith. Sit down." Snape growls."The most common kinds of liquid fuels are petroleum, cryogenic, and hypergolic based. Synth-"Snape waves his wand. And suddenly you can no longer hear yourself talking.But you continue to remain focused on your lecture to worry about PETTY things like LEARNING and SAFETY.You're busy discussing the hydrolysis of hydrogen gas when you're splashed by the residue of some kind of liquid. Immediately your skin feels TERRIBLE as boils erupt like magma bubbles on a primordial planet.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cwUpV9enHBsMalfoy and several other people seem to be laughing at you. It seems that the bullying and bad times just wont stop. Your house hates you and all the older students bully you for both your race and your magic. You hit a girl who was helping you.Your HUSBAND has a minder-all your clothing was taken and even though you try to be yourself like daddy tells you-you end up being ridiculed and covered in painful boils... GOD what if the boils stay there FOREVER?Your eyes feel wet like ancient mars. Hermione gently puts her hand on your arm.>hold it in>let it out
>>4564576>hold it inStare down the fucker that dared splashed us. They will go down in our book of GRUDGES.
>>4564576>Hold it in. It will become the bitter fuel that will send us to the stars>begin plans for an orbital killing spell
>>4564576Supporting >>4564579 & >>4564580
>>4564579+1 preferably unblinkingly
>>4564579>>4564580>>4564600>>4564603give me a composer roll: 2d6+1.
Rolled 2, 4 + 1 = 7 (2d6 + 1)>>4564622
Rolled 3, 5 + 1 = 9 (2d6 + 1)>>4564622
Rolled 3, 5 + 1 = 9 (2d6 + 1)>>4564622Rollan
>>4564626 (7)>>4564633 (9)>>4564634 (9)avg 8.33 pass. Writing.
>>4564576No. You will not be brought low by this. YOU ARE SASHA SAGAN-STARBOUND. You turn your SADNESS into RAGE and your RAGE into HATE. You let the HATE flow through you. You envision yourself atop an orbital station dropping magically embiggened tungsten poles on top of whoever was responsible not only for this but for the bullying, the missing clothing, and everything bad that has ever happened to you. You GLARE with the FURY of SUPERNOVA at the person next to the exploded cauldron which rained PESTILENCE upon your skin.He whimpers in a familiar and pathetic way.It's Neville.>punch him in the boils>write-in
>>4564676Try to calm down and examine the situation. Jim Lovell didn't let his emotions get the best of him when disaster struck Apollo 13, so neither should you.
>>4564676T-POSE TO SHOW YOUR SUPERIOURITY
>>4564676Poor Neville, lol>Inform him that he is now our whiteboard for life, and go to Pomfrey for repairs. Only soil-bloods get 'healed', spaceveins get Repairs.
>>4564693>SupportHe's on the shit list now
>>4564676Snape vanishes the remainder of Neville's potion with a wave of his wand. "Longbottom, that was the most disastrous cure for boils potion I have ever seen. 10 points from Gryffindor." He sneers.You calm down an examine the situation. It seems like this really was a simple mistake. ow that you think of it Neville has had some serious bad luck ever since coming to Hogwarts and he hasn't even had friends to help him like you have. Maybe you can find it in your BIG heart to forgive POOR Neville?NAH!You hoist Neville up by his shirt and look him dead in the eye like the challenger astronauts going to hell for this shit"You are my whiteboard now.""Professor Snape I am going for repairs." you say like the superior SPACEVEINED being that you are.Snape narrows his eyes at you. "Very well. Longbottom will guild you. He spent all of last night there after all..."In between his boils you see Neville flush. before he walks out the door, his head held to the ground admist the jeering of his classmates.You follow him in silence for a minute before deciding to put both your arms out like the essential protrusions of a service structure. As you pass by a window early morning light casts a LOOMING eclipse over Nevilles shoulder. He looks back only to see your IMPOSING and LITHIC-LIKE face. He then quickly turns away from your TERRIFYING VISAGE with a whimper. Soon you notice a trail of wet liquid descending down one of Neville's pant legs.>Neville>Hermione>Draco>Ron>Harry
>>4564722>DracoI wonder what BOY is thinking
>>4564722>DracoI had my doubts before but Sasha is definitely a Slytherin
>>4564722Your name is Draco Malfoy, Heir to the Malfoy Fortune. You've begun your first foray into POLITICS. Due to your fathers CLEVER SCHEMES you've already come to Hogwarts equipped with two loyal vassles.Father explained that happenings and general nature of Hogwarts was, in fact, quite similar to the outside world. By reading between the lines (as you were taught) you think that he expected that you would use this opportunity to RULE the school from the shadows as all MALFOY'S have.The only issue is your temperament. Where as your father is cunning, cold and sharp your natural disposition is bumbling, warm, and soft. But being the only heir it is imperative that you conceal this inadequacy lest the other families catch on and alliances breakdown from perceptions of your inadequacy. You tutors have done much to rectify this, PAINFULLY at times, but you endured it for your families sake. At the moment you would rate yourself as not competent but merely bellow expectations.You know your father loves you but you just wish... The pressure...You sigh. Vincent grunts.You mentally role your eyes. What was it that father said? "It is better to have no coven members than troll coven members?". Frankly you respect the sheer muscle of the two boys but for all other purposes they are useless. Vincent has trouble reading and keeps on saying that "the words are moving to much" for him to understand. You believe him of course. He has no reason to fake something that has only caused him pain and beatings by his father. But still you DO NOT look forward to tutoring him every night. Gregory on the other hand is a social idiot and more often than not is unable to express his intent so he remains stock still and silent most of the time. The best you can get from him is a nod or intimidating face. Which seems to have been rehearsed. You and Cabbe have figured out that he is good at one thing: numbers you've seen some of your mother's old arithmancy notes before she married your father. Gregory is undeniably a prodigy but unfortunately an idiot in all other aspects. (1/2)
>>4564796You think that father setting you up with Vincent and Gregory may have been a test to see if you were capable of being ruthless and cutting them off. But you could never do that. You know that father likely made his alliance with their families conditional on how well each of the boys assisted you. Abandoning them would just be cruel. Your father never hit you, but judging by Vincent's back and stomach and Gregory's fear of water you can only imagine what kind of punishments they'll receive for failing their mission.Recently, however, a certain witc-MUDBLOOD has been on your mind.Father would most certainly disapprove and Mother would most definitely faint at you associating with someone so crass. Besides she isn't even a half blood you nod to yourself.But you can't help but wonder at her. At one moment she could be screeching your ears off and at another talking as proper as prim. Her ability to express her emotions so freely and to chase after her dream with such wanton abandon uncaring of her peers and appearance is just so DIFFERENT from everything you've known.You mentally slap yourself for getting side tracked. No you need to marry a good pureblood witch. Preferably of a noble house. Not some tall, confident, and gorgeous witch with the most brilliant eyes you've ever se-OH for MERLIN'S SAKE!You shift to thinking about charms with the Hufflepuffs. In order to secure prestige within slytherin house you need to obtain points or more accurately secure more points than the opposing house in your class. This means trickery... After some introductions Flitwick the Half-Breed (goblin of all creatures) begins his lesson."Today you will be learning "lumos". Now can anybody tell me about this charm?">answer.>engage in trickery (how?)>say nothing.
>>4564797>answer.We're definitely smarter than most of the plebs here. We don't know much about space, but we rule in magic.
going to bed. Be back at 6:45pm EST tommorow.
>>4564797>answerI've been reminded that both the Malfoys and Goblins encompass the aspects of the JewGod I love this series
>>4564797>answerSo he IS crushing on Sasha. Does Sasha have Veela blood that's just making itself known or something? Also Damn why you got me feeling like this for Draco's fucking satellites QM. We gotta recruit Gregory for S.P.A.C.E L.O.V.E.R.S now that math brain will be a big help for the space race
>>4564797>answer.>but also sneak in a dig at him for being a halfbreed
>>4564797You raise your hand a hair faster than the hairy Mudblood girl. And Flitwick calls on you."Mr.Malfoy""Lumos is the wand lighting charm, invented in the 18th century by Levina Monkstanley. The counter charm is 'nox'. It has no wand movements and only requires you to channel magic into your wand while saying the incantation, and since the brightness varies depending on the amount of magic channeled it is an exceptionally good spell for practicing ones magical control." "Excellent a very thorough answer!" The half breed smiles. "2 points to Slytherin."You mentally frown that answer was worth at least 5 points. Well you expected this. Other teachers don't seem inclined to Slytherin. Were it not for Godfather Snape's ahem-assistance Slytherins would be at an even more massive disadvantage. This almost makes you regret not insulting his heritage. But only barely you stand to gain little from such an action. Father always taught you to balance your emotions with good sense,"Lumos is indeed an extraordinarily useful spell . Not only can it-" The tip of Flitwicks wand lights up "banish darkness, it's magical light is capable of repelling specters of all sorts and illuminating magically hidden passages.""Now then BEFORE you all get your wands out and begin practicing the spell. I want you to repeat after me. LUMOS. Now then, once more. LUMOS. Very good, I shall be around the class if you need assistance and please feel free to assist each other."The door creaks open revealing the witch of your dre-.NO BAD BRAIN.Flitwick takes her to the side presumably to give her some instruction. Oh Merlin's Balls he's pointing at you.Sasha walks towards you. Luckily there's no place for her to sit beside you thanks to your two large friends.She instead opts to simply stand in front of your desk. Either not noticing the slight or simply not caring. She looks at you with her brilliant eyes.Your palms get sweaty. And you notice Flitwick (the midget) giggling to himself while looking at you.>Sneer and refuse to teach her (it's hard to maintain your composure around her)>Teach her extremely reluctantly.
>>4565616>Teach her extremely reluctantly.
>>4565616Teach her (not reluctantly)
>>4565616Teach her with feigned reluctance
>>4565616>Teach her (not) reluctantly.
>>4565616"Need something SMITH?" you say reminding yourself mentally of her muggle heritage."Flitwick said you could help me.""Did he now..." you say while glaring at the gob shagger. You'll swear the he'll pay you back 10 FOLD for th-"Will you help me like the Russians and Americans did in the Apollo–Soyuz mission?" Sasha says, interrupting your train of thought."FINE. But you owe me... Gertrude."The tips of her ears turn delightfully red.....Your name is Sasha Sagan-Starbound. MALFOY has just used your FORBIDDEN name; again, he also used it last night. How will you PUNISH him for these insurrections?>"your hair has more lubrication than the wheels of the space shuttle. And it isn't as aerodynamic">shrug it off and get taught>walk away>write-in
>>4565648>shrug it off and get taughtGrin and bear it for that sweet, sweet F U N D I N GAlso someone has to give to get this social link going and it probably won't be Malfoy (at first)
>>4565648>write-incast the spell Spaghetti Pockets
>>4565648>shrug it off and get taught
>>4565665Posketti!Support, but attempt to sneakily cast itWe don't want any trouble
>>4565681I meant on ourself, but I'm down for anything. Malfoy is kinda growing on me.
>>4565648Shrug off for now, but that one's going in the book of grudges
>>4565665Does not exist (spoiler)yet(/spoiler) also violates the first exception to Gamp’s Law of Elemental Transfiguration.
>>4565648Sometimes you have to give a little to get something. Just like the Nazi rocket scientists gave their research to the US and USSR in excahnge for their lives. This is why you grin and bare with the NAME calling for now and shrug off Hermione's frantic gesturing for the sake of FUNDING.However you will never forget this grudge and will repay it 10 fold. Quickly you take your COSMIC JOURNAL out of your bag and start a new section called GRUDGES in back.You write Malfoy down twice for using your FORBIDDEN name, twice again for ordering his thugs to push RED DWARF, and once for not coming to SPACE class last night. Dang that's alot of GRUDGES he needs to repay."SMITH are you done writting or do I have to wait for you to finish befor teaching you?" Draco spits."I'm done."He sighs dramatically "Ok let's start form the top..."Turns out Malfoy is a pretty good teacher. Maybe you could learn something about teaching from him for your SPACE LESSONS.Soon class is over and you make your way to the great hall with your friends to enjoy lunch. It seems stormy outside. Who do you sit beside?>bobcut girl>Hermoine and Ron>HARRY>Draco and his minions>Other year mates>write-in
Calling it quits today no thread until next Monday at 7:00pm EST be back then.Also you can cast lumos now.Will hang around for a bit ask me some meta questions and I might answer them .
>>4565749Can main characters of the Harry Potter universe die? Could we somehow fuck up enough to get voldemort to kill Harry dead I mean?
>>4565749How far can we take the quest in our crusade for the stars?
>>4565782Yes all characters can die. Harry and the others are no exception. As for how badly you would have to fuck up... Hard to say. >>4565802You can meet aliens if they exist. Go full 4x. I'll prob end it the aliens though.
Anime has irreparable damaged my imagination, thus as I each these events unfold I cannot help but picture this turning into a cheap hentai were we whore ourselves out to Draco for the promise of FUNDING.Also are we dark skinned? I thought it was mentioned somewhere we have chocolate skin.
>>4565722>>4565722>Write in>Apologise to BOBCUT GIRL for the misunderstanding this morningWe thought she was a BULLY who we needed to assert dominance to but we were wrong and now feel badThen>manoeuvre HARRY to RED DWARF and RONALD so the four of you can eat lunch togetherDammit with no troll bonding times do we have to get the golden trio together ourselves? >>4565941Yeah Harry mentioned we're chocolate skinned
>>4565722Well the bullying was nasty. But we need to apologise.>>4566030Support
>>4566284Oh fuck we can use the n-word
>>4566284INFINITE POWAAAAAAAA>>4566030+1Why was the troll there again? Also, which version of troll does the HP universe have again, the just a better orc edition or the regenerating glutton?
>>4566514Inb4 we trade magical and non magical slurs with Malfoy, making him a friend
>>4566533>Inb4 we start making up new slurs.
>>4566555>Nigga-bloods>Mud-crackers>We ain't even started on the process after synthesis.But I would have thought Malfoy would have been told "don't stick your dick in crazy"
>>4566559I'm starting to believe we're some kind of succubus with all the male interest we're gathering. Reading Draco's thoughts makes me chuckle because it sounds like a mix of someone who desperately doesn't be gay and someone who's into bleaching black girls- but you know- for mudbloods.>Limp-wands>Potion-junkies>Griffoncucks
>>4566530Troll was there because quirrelmort summoned him as a distraction so he can snoop around. We sent him off cougar hunting instead so no troll for us. >>4566564I'm convinced Sasha is half Veela somehow. The only one not affected by our charms is Ron and he likes guys so of course he'll be immune.
Bump for quest
>>4567419Bumps don't help at this point. We've got another 16 days on the board.
>>4565722 You take this opportunity to go up to the bob cut girl who you ASSAULTED this morning.She glances at you and then goes back to her meal."Hey I'm sorry for this morning..."The response is swift."Go away mudblood."You notice the cutlery in her hand shaking.Just as you're about to respond the meaty mittens of Malfoy's minion moves you back to the side of the hall."Boss wanted be to tell you that that girl is trouble. All the other girls hate her so being close to hers a bad idea.""I understand sir and would very much like to be released so that I could partake in my midday meal."The big boi removes his hand from your shoulder "O-ok."Perhaps apologizing to the BOBCUT later would be best?https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QCoiV3AFsJkYou scan the table like the Hubble space telescope scans space and identify a supercluster of your friends. It seems that Harry, Hermione, and Ron are all sitting together.You sit next to the free seat beside Hermione."Did you manage to apologize?" RED DWARF asks."No.""Oh. Listen I've heard that Hogwarts has one of the best magical libraries in the world..."She looks up at you ocular organs wide and animated like the eye of Jupiter. You notice RONALD with all the subtlety of an igniting rocket give Hermione the thumbs up. HARRY appears to be playing with some asparagus. "Do you want to s-study together sometime?"Wow looks like your FRIEND wants to spend some time with you. You're really interested in the library now since it might have KNOWLEDGE for your DREAM.>ok>no way fag>write-in
>>4571019"Ok Hermione.""YES! I mean c-cool." she says while flaring red and tucking her hair over her head.With that you finish the rest of your lunch and make your way over to the green houses for your first herbology lesson with the Ravenclaws.The professor emerges from behind one of the desk. Her apron and gloves are covered with dirt."Greetings children I am Professor Sprout." she says while smiling kindly.Herbology is one of the core classes in Hogwarts. Can anyone tell me why?"Immediately Hermione hand shoots up. You notice that a couple Ravenclaws also put up their hands almost as quick. Professor sprout points to a ravenclaw with dreadlocks and a seriously dazed expression on his face."Like, my dad used to grow all kinds of plants before he went to prison..."You hear some students whisper beside him."Whats prison?""It's like muggle Azkaban."They both take a few steps away from the guy."Well you certainly don't let your lack of father let you down do you?" Professor sprout says in a slightly strained voice. "Now as I was asking-""Herbology is the study, care, and cultivation of magical and mundane plants. Plants which have a variety of important uses in magical society as potion ingredients, medicine and so on. However the most important aspect of plants and in specific MAGICAL plants is that they like all living magical beings have the capacity to generate, store, and emit magical energy which helps sustain the magnam sphaeram and thus preserves magic around terra. But because plants outnumber animals 1000 to 1 their well being and thus care has a disproportional effect on the general well being of all living things thus herbology is subject of the upmost import which it is one of Hogwarts core classes. MAH WIGGER!"Excellent my dear 5 point to Ravenclaw. But what exactly is a "Wigger"?""Aw shit, a wigger is like... A muggle but with magic.""You mean a wizard?""Naw man nona dat sexist shit!""5 points from Ravenclaw!" Professor Sprout interjects "In the future you will speak the Queens English while attending Hogwarts!""But didn't he just swear?" Malfoy asks."Really?" The Professor looks astonished as William Anders must have been when he took "Earthrise". "I didn't hear a word of it?""Oh for crying out loud!" A slytherin you don't know says. "He said sheit!""Mr.Nott! 10 points from Slytherin for such FOUL language!"It's time to pot and plant some worm wood. Who are you partnering with?>Hermione>Malfoy>Harry>Ron>My Wigger
>>4571141>>My WiggerMagical Snoop Dogg looks like he knows what’s up
slow day eh might be the time to start a new thread... Be back tomorrow with FRESH post at 7pm EST.
>>4571141>My WiggerLooks like we have found the weed fag
>My wiggerI wonder if he can grow magic weed that'll take us into the atmosphere
How the fuck this 11 yo kid already a stoner
>>4571141You approach the dreadlock boy. Completely ignoring both Harry and Hermione.He looks you up and down before cracking into a smile."DAMN! Hey there baby-girl wassup, my name T-dawg""Nice to met you T-dawg."He motions for you to come to the planting station and puts an arm around your neck."Let me give it to you straight. You and I we ain't like the rest of these wiggers... Naw got a dream and we knows how to gets it? Don't we."You nod."I think we can help each other out... Go into business. I scouted out a patch of dirt by the forest gunna get some seeds and plant them there. Make a GREENHOUSE of sorts.""Why?""Well lets just say that dreams don't cheap. You get what I'm saying?""Yes I've been trying to secure FUNDING for my DREAM as well.""Yeah you wanna go to fucking space. Sheiiiiit. Well I ain't gunna lie to you, the most I'll make is a couple hundred gallons from this venture. But hey, money is money right?""Anyways here's the deal you just gotta check on the plant every couple of days and make sure their pest free and all. Imma try to rustle up some franklines round school in the mean time to get some gansta ass wards up round the patch. Yah hear?""How much will I be getting?""SHIEEEEET that all depends on what SEEDS I fucking get... ">ok>no way this is illegal >write-in
>>4572408>okWe don’t need no rocket ship to get HIGH
>>4572408"Ok T-dawg""Alright sweet cheeks remember to head out there tonight I gotta explain how to take care of whatever pests wanna fuck up the SEEDS I get."With that the two of you busy yourselves with planting wormwood. T-dawg mentions that it can be used for shrinking solution and the draught of living death a potion that puts the drinker into suspended animation seemingly indefinitely. You not sure what shrinking solution could be used for but the draught seems like a perfect substitute for the cryogenic stasis on a sub-light ships if you never manage to get FTL working.T-dawg and you set up an assembly line system where you he digs holes and you insert the seeds.The results are spectacular as the twinkle of the nights stars. You and T-dawg manage to plant four hundred and twenty wormwood seeds. And net both of your houses 5 points.You make your way to the next class. Pondering the viability of funding your DREAM with various entrepreneurial ventures like T-dawg is attempting.>endeavor to look into it>don't look into it>think about it laterWhen you enter Defense against the Dark arts with the Gryffindor's you sit next to...>Harry>Hermione>Ron>Draco>?????
>>4572566>think about it later>sit next to Draco
>>4572566>>endeavor to look into it>>Draco
making din din brb 1 hr
>>4572566You opt to think about this topic later. Presumably after you've had the chance to plan your FUNDING strategy.You casually sit down beside Malfoy who seems to appear incredibly constipated."You should eat more vegetables Draco.""What?""A lack of fiber in your diet cause stool excretion to be less then ideal. Don't want to pull a Shephard do you?""I don't know why I bother." He says while rolling his eyes."W-w-welcome to D-defence against the D-d-dark A-arts"The turban wearing professor says while stroking his iguana."I-I am P-pr-professor Q-quirrell. T-today w-we will b-be..."Wow it seems like this guys stutters alot. Normally this wouldn't be a problem except he's also talking really slow like the decay of red dwarfs. Five PAINFUL minutes later he seems to have finally finished his introduction and begins a very boring lesson on ghosts which is stretched out further by him occasionally jumping at his own shadow and forgetting what he just said. You're pretty sure he's said one interesting thing so far about how ghosts being bound to haunt their location or even person of choice.Looking around you can see that everyone is either goofing off or reading their textbook.>Say something to Malfoy>Read your textbook>write-in
last post for the night be back tomorrow at 7pm EST
>>4572746>>Say something to Malfoy>"The speed of light in vacuum, commonly denoted c, is a universal physical constant important in many areas of physics. Its exact value is defined as 299792458 metres per second"
>>4572746>Read your textbookQuirrell is impossible, we need to learn this on our own if we are to put it to good use.
>>4572746You lean over and whisper into Malfoy's ear."The speed of light in vacuum, commonly denoted c, is a universal physical constant important in many areas of physics. Its exact value is defined as 299792458 metres per second.""And why in Merlin's name are you telling me this for?" Malfoy whispers back sharply while leaning away from you."Seemed relevant."He rolls his eyes."HONESTLY Smith-" you write another entry into the GRUDGE section of your journal. "Seriously?""What?""You literally have a list of grudges? You keep track of every affront against you and somehow intend to get them back for this.""Yes.""I see that I've offended you many times..." He add slowly.You simply stare at him cold as the ice on Neptune."Will you leave me alone now?" He pleads."No."Malfoy buries his head in his textbook eclipsing his face with it.Several seconds pass."Hey Malfoy.".No response"Hey Malfoy.".No response"Hey Malfoy.".No response"Hey Malfoy.""Ugh. What is it?""Help me get to space."He narrows his eyes"Why would I?""Because I asked you nicely."Malfoy is unconvinced.>bribe him (how?)>persuade him (how?)>intimidate him (how?)>write-in (how?)
>>4573716>Persuade him. Cause if you do I'll strike off the grudges, and you can join me on the ship, wouldn't it prove to everyone the Malfoy family are truly the best pureblood house if their son was the first pureblood in space.
>>4573806ok roll 2d6+1 since no people I'll just take the first roll
Rolled 3, 5 + 1 = 9 (2d6 + 1)>>4573823
>>4573716You think for a moment about Malfoy and what makes him tick. You do know that he's from some kind of nobility and really likes purebloods..."If you do I'll strike off the GRUDGES, and you can join me on the ship, wouldn't it prove to everyone the Malfoy family are truly the best PUREBLOOD house if their son was the first PUREBLOOD in space.""Your attempts at manipulation are crude and overt SMITH." Draco sneers.You fight the itch to increase your GRUDGES."I'll join you in your 'lessons' but if you think for a moment that the MALFOY family will fund your batty scheme you're insane.""One man's insanity is another's genius."Draco remains silent the rest of the class.It's DINNER, who do you sit with?>Harry>Hermoine>Draco>T-dawg>bob cut>Ron>Fuck DINNER acquire KNOWLEDGE at the library.
>>4573883>>Draco>>T-dawgLet's make our own golden trio
>>4573883>Harry>T-dawgWe need to get every one of us moodbloods on that weed business
>>4573883>Draco>T-DawgWe can promise him to let him get high in space
>>4573883You walk over to the Ravenclaw first years who seem to be in a debate about ghosts."I TOLD you only wizards are capable of making ghosts!" a snooty Ravenclaw gestures."I fail to see how that implies that muggles are inferior." an uptight looking girl replies. "Don't you get it?" another claw says while glaring at the snooty boy "he's implying that muggles are philosophical zombies! T-that they lack SOULS!"Several gasps are heard throughout the table and an animated murmur emerges.T-dawg is giggling while look up at the ceiling.You glide up like the space shuttle descending from the atmosphere "Hey T-dawg would you like to plant your posterior with me and Draco?"T-dawg instantly stops giggling and looks you dead in the eye."Sheiiiiit, alright just this once, since my homies-" He gestures to the currently very quiet table "don't like that snake venom you gotta come over next time, yah hear?""Yes I understand." you say. Seems Slytherin has a singularly sinister reputation.On you way back to the table T-dawg says "Thanks baby girl, makes me seem legit AS FUCK hanging around a G like Draco.""You've heard of him?""Course I have, heir to one the RICHEST WIGGERS in uk.""You did your homework.""Shiiiiet it be like tsun zu says: The general who wins a battle makes many calculations in his temple ere the battle is fought.""You seem smarter than you look...""Yeah get that shit alot. Wiggas ain't nothing compared to the fucking street. Gotta HUSTLE or get FUCKED." (1/2)
>>4574051As you're about to reach the table you're blocked by a few tough looking upper years."Who is your acquaintance, SMITH?" A Vanguard rocket looking fellow spits. You make a mental note to add him to your GRUDGES."T-dawg. He's from Ravenclaw."You see Draco facepalm.The VANGAURD smiles as his fellow's crack their knuckles "Oh is he now...""Yeah I am, or you wiggas gotta problem with that?" T-dawg says while puffing his chest out.IT looks a bit ridiculous given that even you're a head taller than T-dawg and the Upper years are a head taller than you."And a FOREIGNER as well. Though the name makes it obvious..." The VANGUARD mutters."Why don't you escort your 'friend' back to their table SMITH. They seem to have gotten lost." He continues."And come sit with us when you're done..." He says while looking you up and down "We can talk about how things work in Slytherin for those with 'less fortunate' backgrounds..." He says while licking his lips.Before you have a chance to respond T-dawg drags you over to the side of the room."FUCK. Those wiggas be busting our BALLS. And you see that fucking basketball poll muthafucka? He be looking at you like MEAT. FUCK.""Y-yes they do seem to be very difficult." you say while shuttering."SHIT. I can't let this shit go. Gotta show I ain't gunna be pushed around." He mutters while pacing.HARRY, Ron, Hermoine and one of Draco's minions arrive."What's wrong?" HARRY asks, piercing you with his BRILLIANT green eyes.You and T-dawg fill him in."I say we sit down together. They can't stop all of us." HARRY says."That's where your wrong honey." Ron says with attitude "Sure they might let us sit but it's what come after we have to worry about.""I can handle anything." HARRY says in an extremely DREAMY and MASCULINE way. "What if we just sit with another house? Hufflepuffs or Gryffindors?" Hermione suggests.Malfoy's Satellite shakes is meat head "No deal. Boss can't be seen with either of them. It'll drag his reputation into the mud. Maybe the mu-Sasha has some idea." "You were going to say 'mudblood' weren't you?" HARRY says while glaring."FUCK glasses. Don't be starting fights right now." T-dawg says while breaking HARRY and MINION 1 up "I say get together and fuck them up when then leave. Go GANSTA on they ass."Looks like it's up to you. What do you suggest?>Just sit. They can't stop all of you.>Sit somewhere else (where?)>Let it slide but jump the guys in the halls.
last post new one tomorrow at 7pm EST. Good night my friends.
>>4574078>Let it slide but jump the guys in the halls.T-Dawg is a horrible influence on us and I love it.Maybe we could trick some girls or other boys to get into fight with them, magic n shit.
>>4574078>>Let it slide but jump the guys in the halls.>>4574089+1 for starting a megafight
So... is T-Dawg white or black?
>>4574078>Let it slide but jump the guys in the halls.We gotta be sneaky about this though like a good snake. >>4574089+1 for organising a massive brawl to get them beat up
>>4574078>Just sit. They can't stop all of you.
>>4574285+1 about sneaky good sheeeit(well I mean as sneaky as a niggnog and an autist can be)
>>4574078You think for a moment with your big SPACE brain."I agree with T-dawg we should ambush them in the halls."Hermione seems unconvinced. "I don't think that we can overpower them. Out of all of us only Goyle can really put up a fight.""Sista are you a witch or not?" Ron exclaims."Oh!" Hermione startles "Well I do know the tripping hex..."T-dawg begins getting excited. "Yeah yeah. And we can blind those fuckers with LUMOS. Just gotta hit them in the sack to bring them down. Right TEETH?"Hermione bristles "And what exactly do you mean by te-?!" You add an additional point. "We should also involve more people that way we won't be hurt."SATELLITE 1 nods. "Hmm people fighting can act as a cover for what we're about to do... Make it harder to get in trouble. It'll let me and Cabbe act in support you chaps while preserving deniability in front of-""Whoa, and I thought you were all brawn big guy." Ron says while feeling the Satellites MEATY arm up.He pushes Ron "Sod off."Harry turns to words you and nods. "He'll PAY for what he said to you Sasha."---Huh seems like you briefly blacked out there.Thankfully Ron fills you in on the final details."T-dawg is going to lead some Gryffindors on an "adventure" through a mysterious and FORBIDDEN passage. On the way there they'll stumble across Harry being bullied the upper years. T-dawg will try to start a fight but if that doesn't work then Hermoine will cast the tripping hex at one of the Gryffindors and T-dawg can claim it was one of the Slytherins. "Once they start fighting you, me, Hermonie, Cabbe and Goyle jump out from some behind some suits of armor, blind everyone with LUMOS and hit them in the bullocks before running away.""What about HARRY and T-dawg?""They need to stay there for deniability."You clench your fists dramatically "I will have my VENGEANCE.""Right then... We should probably get going." Ron says while slowly backing away from you.There is no way for this plan to go wrong.Roll 2d6 for [Sneaking] average of three 8+ for a success.
Rolled 4, 3 = 7 (2d6)>>4575000
Rolled 5, 1 = 6 (2d6)>>4575000
Rolled 4, 1 = 5 (2d6)Lets do this.
>>4575003 (7)>>4575024 (6)>>4575025 (5)avg 6 FAIL
>>4575035shhhhh. It's ok.
>>4575000>>4575000[Sneaking lvl 0]->[Sneaking lvl 0 1/4]Slowly, quietly, softly... The assault group makes it's way into the hall.After some fumbling you and your friends have all made it behind their respective suits of armor.Listening carefully you begin to hear foot steps growing louder."Well why did the-boy-who-lived invite us to a private conversation?" VANGUARDS screechy voice echos in the halls. "Ready to whore out the mudblood girl? Maybe you have a soft spot for her? Shame tha-"You hear a wet squelch and someone fall to the floor."G-get him you fools!"After some tussling noises you hear the sounds of HARRY struggling. It breaks your heart more than NASA's hobbled budget."Well looks like we'll have to teach the-boy-who-lived his place now won't we...""I'll never give in to scum like you. You WILL take back what you said about her." You begin to feel a little faint as you feel all the blood rush to your cheeks.At any rate it seems the scene is set. T should be here with the Gryffindors any momentThe only problem is that you have a really bad urge to fart.Your probably shouldn't eat so many beans. Even if they do have large amounts of fiber.*toot*"Huh, what was that?" you hear the shoes one of the upper year boys as he approaches your suit of armor. "Smells like... BEANS.""Really Crawford? You're doing this sheit now? You can satisfy you unusual fetishes later right now we have a young and supple boy to punish." The other interjects hastily."...""...""I'm going to finish what I started." Crawford replies.OH NO. He seems like he's about to notice you.>LUMOS in the face>Remain silent in the hopes that T-dawg or someone else will draw their attention away.>Write-in
>>4575084Lumos followed by a cock punch from us, these perverts ain't stealing our man. Reeeeee
be back in 40 min making food.
>>4575092+1 cockpunch that fucker with the force of a Saturn V taking off.
>>4575084>LUMOS in the face>Destroy their progeny>Meteor Punch to the Nads
>>4575084Many thoughts run through your head. What will happen if you're discovered. Complicated thoughts about Blood supremacy. Your inability to resist cooked beans. But one single thought emerges as greater and more important than the rest. Your mind's focus is called on like never before to pursue this one increasingly important thought.Oh god. What if he does something to HARRY and he LIKES IT?No.https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NFjE5A4UAJIYOU ARE SASHA SAGAN-STARBOUND AND NOTHING WILL STAND IN YOUR WAY! You POUR your HEART and SOUL into your wand and shout:"LUMOS!""Argh!"You uncover your eyes and spy his crotch. Open as the fields of the Kennedy space center. You charge up you punch by kneeling optimizing the trajectory of your fist to inflict MAXIMAL DAMAGE. Though it takes some time to describe it this all happened in the time it takes a single spark to fly off of an ignition fuse.Your fist rockets through the air like the Saturn V. But unlike the Saturn V your fist isn't fueled with liquid propellants but something much more powerful... AUTISM and THE ROMANTIC-DESPERATION OF A PRETEEN.Time seems to slow down as you approach the event horizon.You relish the moments before impact as you see your friends charge out from their hiding positions.You fist sends WAVES over the boys body like the Theia impact sent waves over the mantel of primordial earth.You fell the satisfying squelching enveloping your knuckles the the ergonomic and shock absorbing foam lining in manned rocket seats.The bully drops and begins foaming at the mouth."Per aspera ad astra. Bitch."The rest of your crew drop their targets like space debris pulled into earths inner gravitational field.You retreat hurriedly but without consequence. Hearing the exclamations of several stampeding Gryffindors.Locking the door to an abandoned classroom. You address Cabbe, Goyle, HARRY, Hermione, and Ron>Nice work team.>We should plan our return>Write-in
I sleep. New post at 7pm EST tomorrow.
>>4575224>Nice work team>We shall plan our returnBest we don't get caught by some bitch Karen teacher before we can celebrate our W with T-Dawg and everyone else.
>>4575224You look over your crew."That was good work. We should plan our return.""Right then we could wait a while to let them leave, but I think it best that we return before they notice anything amiss pretend like we were studying in the common room the whole time." Harry says.The rest of the group nods.Hermione has a contemplative look on her face. "That means Cabbe and Goyle should go back in one group and the rest of us in another... Time it so that both our groups have pausable deniability.""And if anyone sees us come back?" Ron asks."Tell them that I was looking for Sasha who seemed a bit down in the dumps because T-dawg didn't get to sit with us. You two" she says while pointing at Ron and HARRY "followed because you were worried.""Won't they tattle on HARRY?" You ask in concern."No chance. That would mean they got beat up by an eleven year old. Their pride won't allow it."Goyle grunts in affirmation. "Come on Cabbe lets go back the boss... Oh yeah and Sasha.""What?""The boss will want to see you after this. Said something about teaching you politics in Slytherin."Hermione interjects "SASHA doesn't need to meet with MALFOY. Besides I know everything there is to know about Slytherin politics.""Oh yeah? Whose the head of Slytherin?""Professor Snape of course." Hermione replies in a prim voice.Goyle shakes his head "That proves you know nothing."You all manage to make it back to the common room with no hitchs.You have time to do 1 of the following before your SPACE LESSONS. Alternatively you can forgo teaching today and get two tasks done.>Politics with Malfoy>Library with Hermoine>HAND HOLDING with HARRY>Potions essay (due tomorrow)>write-in
>>4576105>>Potions essay (due tomorrow)>Politics with MalfoyLearn magic weed and learn slytherin shit
>>4576105You decide that after a day of tomfoolery and hooliganism it's time to engage in the prymary reason why you've been sent to Hogwarts. KNOWLEDGE.You excuse yourself to your room to work on your potions essay. "WAIT. Sasha you should do it with the rest of us.""Ok.""The rest of us?" Ron nervously says while attempting to inch away."YES. You've seen how they treat... Treat people like Sasha and I. To them you're guilty by association and I won't have them picking on us for our low grades.""But I was going to play chess...""Quit crying Ron besides if you need the extra help. I've already finished." She interjects smugly."Already finished?! Snape gave us the assignment a few hours ago!""Oh I was writing it during lunch and Defence Against the Dark Arts.""I thought I saw you reading?" you ask."O-oh no. I've already memorized most of the textbook anyways.""Your mental." Ron excalimes."How did you do it?" Harry asks suddenly."Mnemonics.""Memonics?" Ron says."No you're saying it WRONG it's MNEMONICS with an "n" not "Memonics"."Ron looks out at the group "Told you she was mental."The potions essay goes especially well thanks to Hermione's near encyclopedic knowledge of the textbook.[Potions lvl 0 0/4]->[Potions lvl 0 1/4]You can now brew: cure for boils.Ron left as soon as he was finished to play chess. You see him facing the Nott chap who pointed out T-dawg's swearing in Herbology.Harry seems to be learning about [Mnemonics] from Hermione.>get going>ask briefly about [Mnemonics]>thank Hermione (how?)>write-in
>>4576165Say to Hermione, "When we make it to OUTER SPACE, your name will be forever emblazoned in the annals of history."Then get going
>>4576165"RED DWARF when we make it to OUTER SPACE, your name will be forever emblazoned in the annals of history.""O-ok."With that your smoothly exit the scene to Malfoy's door.You knock."Malfoy."You knock."Ma-."The door swings open. Revealing Malfoy."Were you followed Smith?" He says while looking around.You look behind you. "No.""Good come with me."Draco leads you down the male Dorm halls before stopping at a rather large portrait of a very fat wizard in a jesters hat balancing on a tightrope above a mud pit."Pull my finger young man!" The image demands angrily.Malfoy ignores him and hits the side of the painting frame 3 times causing the fat jester to fall off of his tight rope and into mud. The portrait then swings open to reveal a SECRET study filled with potion equipment, curious instruments, a roaring fireplace, and everything one could need for RESEARCH and DEVELOPMENT. There's even a bed!"Don't just stand there! Come in!" Malfoy whispers to you sharply.The door closes behind you."Sit.""Am I Laika?" you ask."SMI-Sasha just sit." Malfoy sighs.You sit in one of the plush armchairs enjoying the feeling of it enveloping you like the vastness of SPACE."This is my swamp now.""What?""I like this place."Malfoy glares at you as harsh as the surface of MARS. "Oh no you don't SMITH! My father revealed this location to me. It was HIS long before YOU laid eyes on it." "O-oh sorry." You say feeling a bit guilty about trying to take away a gift from his daddy.Draco suddenly looks away "J-just as long as you understand!"He turns back to face you. "A-anyways. We're going to discuss the political situation in Slytherin right now."(1/2)
>>4576341Draco pulls a movable chalkboard over and draws and upside down triangle divided into five sections. On the bottom tip he writes "Mudbloods" on the next section above it "Halfbloods", above that "Purebloods" on top of that "Noble houses", and at the top he writes "Snape" and "Fabion."Curious you ask "Is Fabion the upper year boy at the head of the table?""Yes. However, he seems to rarely deal with the house directly... That thin and elongated creature that insulted your HONOR is his right hand and enforcer." Malfoy says while clenching his fists."You put him at the same level as Snape our head of house. A puzzling characterization."Malfoy sighs "Yes, for whatever reason godfa-Professor Snape seems to allow him to do as he pleases. And after he insisted I not broach the subject... I suspect some form of blackmail."You are immensely CURIOUS what secret would let a school boy bully a Professor. Much less one as prickly as Snape.Malfoy interrupts "I know what you're thinking SM-SAGAN. But I haven't the faintest clue. Remember that I've only been here a single night just like you.""But you figured this all out?" You ask."Anyone could determine it in a night IF they though about it and IF they paid attention.""So your saying that I need to better understand my surroundings before I act?""Good, certainly much quicker than Gregory." Malfoy says with some satisfaction."Moving on. Below them are the heir's of several noble houses. This year is unusual as the Malfoys, Notts, Parkinsons, Cabbes, Goyles, and Greengrass families all have their heirs in attendance.""What's so important about nobility?"Draco facepalm "NEVER repeat that in front of anyone. Those who are of noble houses will take offense at the implication of their unimportant and you will be outing yourself as a BOOR to everyone else." "O-ok."Dracos expression softens "Essentially noble houses were those wizarding families who were at the signing of the Magna Carta and are responsible both for the formation of the Statue of Secrecy and the Ministry of Magic today. Thus challenging their importance is a very bad idea. Even if implied. It is like saying that you question the legitimacy of wizarding Britain as a nation."Letting it sink in Malfoy continues."Now below them are the "Purebloods" Or those who can trace their wizarding heritage 3 generations back. Below them "Halfbloods" who have some wizarding = parentage and finally at the very bottom. "Mudbloods" born from the union of two muggles." Malfoy spits.For some MYSTERIOUS reason you don't like his tone.>Ur a wiggar>Punch him (where?)>Leave>Demand he respect you (what do you say?)>write-in
I sleep. Back on Monday at 7pm EST. Will answer some questions if you have them.
>>4576347>>Punch him (where?)Shoulder, not too harshly.>And then say:"Just because some people are born without magic doesn't mean they're less than wizards-- were wizards the ones who made it to THE STARS?">And... if you really want to go the autistic route...NEIL ARMSTRONG, YURI GAGARIN, SALLY RIDE? Did they need magic to get to space? NO? I don't think so!>then demand respect and resolve to get some dirt on this Fabion guy-- bond through a shared love of screwing other people over.
>>4576361Supporting this. But also we should find the opportunity to relay this info to Red Dwarf so she can tell the others so no one accidently run afoul of the Syltherin mean girls. Also Draco is such a fucking tsundere for Sasha I'm loving it
>>4576361>it seems wizards have not done alot with magic as they seem to be a minority driven back by magic less people and so inbreed there magic has weakened like for example for what happens with inbreeding bring up the habsburg family shrub for what usually happens but magic must have some effect that balances the inbreeding out as wizards seem stupidly durable sometimes in the books people where a ALOT more ugly then in the movie.
>>4576347You punch Malfoy on the shoulder GENTLY. Unfortunately Draco is built like cardboard and the blow sends him tumbling to the ground."OW! SMITH how dare you BRUTALIZE ME: Draco Malfoy Heir to the Malfoy fortune?! Wait until my father hears about this!""Just because some people are born without magic doesn't mean they're less than wizards-- were wizards the ones who made it to THE STARS?""SMITH are you even listening to me?! I DEMAND an apology and reparations!"Malfoy talks alot so you pin both of his arms to his side and look directly at his COMET like eyes moving your face towards his to make sure he understands."NEIL ARMSTRONG, YURI GAGARIN, SALLY RIDE? Did they need magic to get to space? NO? I don't think so!"Malfoy grows a furious red."UNHAND me this instant SMITH! Or I'll... I''ll...""What?""Do something we'll both regret..." he says uncharacteristically meekly while looking away.You let go "Ok".The fireplace crackles."Why do you hate muggles Malfoy?""Because they're inferior scum that have oppressed wizard kind for centuries." he responds quickly"But-""But nothing SMITH. Magic is only given to a select few. We are the chosen of TERRA. Rule and domination of the planet is our birthright. And those families that have more are naturally even more superior.""Draco have wizards ever ventured beyond the Liminal Veil?"He gives you a dirty look before replying "No.""Do wizards have a telescope in SPACE?""FINE. I will ADMIT that muggles have achieved some notable things. But the race as a whole is still retched and base and owe their minuscule achievements to a a few aberrants.You start to get a little angry. But hold it in. It seems you're not getting through to him.>drop it for now>punch him for real>"If you hate muggleborns and muggles so much why are you teaching me then?"Also happy great conjunction day!
>>4578086>>4578643A little too meta to include in the post. Sasha could come to this conclusion later after some research. But her expertise right no is in astronomy vs biology. And thus only has fifth grade knowledge in that area.
>>4579704>"If you hate muggleborns and muggles so much why are you teaching me then?">"You're way of thinking traps you from other possibilities."
>>4579704>"If you hate muggleborns and muggles so much why are you teaching me then?"
>>4579704"If you hate muggleborns and muggles so much why are you teaching me then?""B-because you were so stupid and pathetic looking and I-I'd be able to make you owe me.""But what exactly can I give you?""S-shut up SMITH it's not like I did this because..."He suddenly goes completely silent like the void between worlds."Your way of thinking traps you from other possibilities."His eyes grow wide and he gulps."I should go." you say feeling the PRODUCTIVITY slipping away TANGIBLY like a spacecraft on a slingshot maneuver slipping away from a gravitational well."T-that would be best."[...]After cleaning up to go to bed you notice a pink letter sealed with some red wax. It's appearance resembles your letter to Hogwarts was only instead of the Hogwarts crest the wax is instead marked with a rose.You don't remember it being there when you came back from Malfoys secret room so whoever sent it must have put it in your room while you were showering.The only issue is that you're SURE you've locked the door before leaving.>open the letter>leave the letter
>>4579797>open the letter
>>4579797>>open the letter
>>4579804>>4579808>>4579815Give me a 2d6 roll. As always 8+ is pass average of 3.
Rolled 5, 3 = 8 (2d6)>>4579816
Rolled 2, 5 = 7 (2d6)>>4579816
Rolled 2, 4 = 6 (2d6)>>4579816
>>4579817 (8)>>4579819 (7)>>4579820 (6)Avg 7 FAIL
>>4579797You open the letter CURIOUS about it's contents. What could possibly be in here?You splattered with a FOUL smelling liquid as soon as you open the letter. The unfortunately familiar sensation of boils erupting over the surface of you skin causes your breathing to hitch.You first instinct is to blame Neville. But then you remember that he isn't even in your house and that the female wing of the dormitories prevents male students from entering.This does mean that who ever did this was a girl. Probably, you suppose, an extension of the bullying this morning.A part of you feels horrible and insecure. Why do the Slytherin girls look down on you? Your blood? For something you can't even change?But the other more dominate part of you is filled with RAGE. How DARE they. You SASHA SAGAN STARBOUND will DESTROY them spaghettify their hopes and dreams. VENGEANCE WILL BE YOURS!As soon as you take care of these boils.You. Very painfully search for some fresh robes. The challenge of finding them more difficult due to the haphazard state of your wardrobe.As you reach the common room you feel your face is burning and OOZING hot liquids like the surface of primordial earth. The rank STENCH that surrounds you is overpowering. Several people dodge our of your way as you attempt to reach the exit."Not so pretty now are you?" the METEOR girl bully from the feast smirks.It seems she recovered quite quickly. Perhaps it's time to be a bit more brutal.>"You were just jealous all along.">attack her (how?)>leave to go to the infirmary>say something witty (what?)
>>4579866>attack her (hug her REAL tight and force her to smell that STENCH)
>>4579866>Break that bitch's wandFuck her.
>>4579881>>45798832d6+1 for your SURPRISE attack and UNCONVENTIONAL TACTICS. Good plan.
Rolled 6, 3 + 1 = 10 (2d6 + 1)>>4579893
Rolled 6, 4 + 1 = 11 (2d6 + 1)>>4579893
>>4579866Also forgot. [Evasion lvl 0 0/4]->[Evasion lvl 0 1/4]
I sleep. Back tomorrow at 7pm EST.
Rolled 5, 6 + 1 = 12 (2d6 + 1)>>4579893
>>4579897 (10)>>4579898 (11)>>4579931 (12)avg 11 CRIT
>>4579866You leap forwards and ENSNARE your victim.She tries to dodge away but is HELPLESS before your speed.She attempts to hold her breath but the SHEER RANKNESS of your putrid body ascends into her nose like a rocket into the heavens.Her eyes are wobbling, knees weak.You're grip remains steadfast.Finally the older girl manages to overpower your grip her escape being fueled by the power of DESPERATION.But you anticipate this like an astronaut anticipates equipment failure. So befor she escapse youu plant your feet firmly on the ground like the frame of a support structure.Thus her attempt to push you only causes her to unbalance and stumble onto the floor.You look down at her while stretching your arms out IMPOSINGLY and channel your fury into a TERRIFYING expression. LOOMING.Some of the pus from your face drips on her.She seems to have wet herself."Do not challenge me. REPENT like the earthbound worm you are.""I-I'm s-sorry!" she says between her tears"For what?" You ask."I-I'm sorry for bullying youuuu!""P-please forgive me SMITH" she says while clutching the hem of your pajamas. Fear of your impending WRATH overpowering her sense of smell.Your face remains impassive."P-please I-I'll do anything!">ok>no>write-in
>>4580766>STARE AT HER MENACINGLY>ok
>>4580766>>4580787ThisGotta keep her guessing if we've really accepted the apology or if we're just pretending to and are biding our time to strike back.
>>4580766You get a sneky idea... While making her submit to you would be nice leaving her in suspense would neutralize her AND prevent her from taking revenge.Maintaining your impassive face you look at her."OK."She begins sweating "I-is that it d-do you forgive me?"You start to walk out of the common room."W-wait it's curfew you'll need a teacher." METEOR says.You glare at her."I-I'll get Professor Snape to escort you.""And you won't tell him anything about our altercation?""YES!" She says quickly before scuttling to Snape's quarters.Approximately three minutes pass before Snape and his cloak come billowing towards you."SMITH." He grinds out "What is the meaning of this?""I fell down the stairs."He glances imperceptibly at METEOR."I see..." Turning towards the crowd of onlookers he says: "Slytherin is the house of cunning and ambition. Bullying brings shame upon the house and upon yourself... It is childish, petty, and produces little of worth. In the future I expect that you will govern yourselves accordingly."He motions for you to follow him out of the common room.Once you are in the halls he begins to lead you to the infirmiey."Twice a day Miss Smith... And for the same accident. I hope that you've completed your essay...""I have." you say.""I have PROFESSOR." Were you from another house I would have deducted points." Snape snaps."S-sorry."The rest of the trip is in silence.After the application of cure for boils and some ODER remover Madame Pomfey deems you fit enough to send back.You're greeted by an almost empty common room. You friends (minus Malfoy) seemed to have formed a circle around METEOR who is fidgeting nervously.Snape raises an eyebrow before saying "Head back to your rooms. NOW."Your friends give you sympathetic looks before scattering."I expect that you will return to your room as well."So you do. It's nearly midnight and your puny prepubescent body is getting tired.>go see T-dawg by the forbidden Forrest for your new part time job that you promised to do (will put you at -1 to all rolls until you get a FULL nights sleep or energize yourself some other way potion abuse)>I sleep>write-in
>>4580882>I sleepMan we just got boiled again and slapped down a bully T-dawg will understand if we show up tomorrow
>>4580882>I sleepChad Sasha
You sleep. As do I.Be back on the 27th at 7pm EST with new thread. I'll answer questions in the mean time maybe post an OMAKE or so.
>>4580891Thanks OP for the thread
>be me>Neville Longbottom>never know my parents because they were tortured into insanity for opposing you-know-who>live with my grandma>constantly comparing me to my father>get so stressed in interferes with the expression of accidental magic>tfw my uncle tries to kill me repetitively in order to "bring it out">It's scary but kinda get used to it>one day he's hanging me by the ankles out the second story window>grandmother offers him tea>tfw he lets go of me>I'm going to bloody die>bounce>tfw everyone is celebrating that I almost died.>get to Hogwarts Express>lose Trevor my first real friend and my only gift from my grandmother>try searching for him and a girl with bushy hair helps me>kinda bossy but also a little qt>get to some random compartment.>suddenly some autist grabs me slams me against the ground and begins writing on me>just sorta freeze from pain and fear she's cute too>Hermione moves to defend me but some how gets knocked unconscious by the autist.>tfw I wet myself>crawl my way out of the compartment so people don't see the stain>luckily autist is talking to the people in the compartment so she ignores me>tfw Cabbe, Goyle, and Malfoy step on me >get to hogwarts>really nervous about sorting and stressed because I still can't find Trevor>proffesor Mcgonagall give me a potion to calm down>not the color of calming draught but drink it anyway because why not>holy shiet>feel on top of the world>also feel kinda hot so I take off my robes>go chat up Hermoine>Mcgonagall casts a spell>now in my frozen undies and have made an ass of myself in front of every one of my peers>tfw I'm death glared by the autist>at the infirmary instead of the feast>didn't even get sorted>for some reason Prof Flitwick come in since he fell on his tuxedo buttons>not sure how that works but ok>get told to rest>wake up hearing the yowling of a cat>get spooked and peer out of the curtains around my bed>tfw I see a midget having sex with a cat>tfw the midget moans "OH Minerva you naughty little pussy">pass out
>>4581997>wake up>Dumbledoor (oh Merlin) explains and then places the sorting hat on my head>want to be sorted into a house that will let me grow plants in peace>want to step out from my fathers shadow.>tfw hat shouts Griffindoor>got to common room>tfw all the girls avoid me and the guy's laugh at me>one of them says that I was leftovers and only got put in Gryffindoor because they didn't have that many people this year.>cry a little before going to bed>first potions lesson>heard the prof is mean as hell>literally makes students cry>memorize the first chapter just in case>prof bullies Harry Potter for some reason>don't really care too nervous to focus>try to prep potion but hands keep on shaking>prof keeps glaring at me and looming>oh shiet did I do something wrong?>accidentally do a counter clockwise turn instead of a clockwise turn>whole potion explodes in my face>covered in boils can barely see>most pain I've felt in my life>see autist who is also covered in boils GLARE at me>oh shit>tfw prof calls me the worst student he's had EVER>tfw he tells me to with autist to infirmary>autist keeps on glaring at me without blinking>freaks me the fuck out>turn a corner>their shadow is absolutely MASSIVE>for some reason they have their arms stretched out in a T like fashion>tfw they hold this position for several minutes>glance back a couple times>autists face is stone cold>literally fearing for my life>piss myself again
>>4580987You're welcome :)
thread archived pls SIMP>http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/qstarchive.html
>>4582022Autist girl is best girl , holy fuck you made me lose my sides
>>4553383Dear Pot QM whoever you are: this is absolutely glorious.
(extra autistic post brought about by unadulterated squee. please ignore. я кopнхoлйo! мнe нyжeн тйпй для мoй бoнгхoл! хeхeхeхe )>>4561365this quest provides a realistic simulation of autistic life in an academic environment. >>4554170football. aeiou>>4554247he already worships the stars, so, a bit of Lovecraft maybe?>>4554341>>4554299yes>>4554476epicness.>>4554607this. also, have a video i made for a similar quest. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r3HWXPeBorE&ab_channel=mkb>>4554654agree>>4554717>dwarf fortress style fey moods>more than oneit will menace with spikes of adamantine!>>4555266>>4556057space and ridiculously low rolls and this song... reminds me of something.>>4557762and with this you've already surpassed HPMOR>>4557988poekhali!>>4558094https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tKlVYJTSzuU>>4558182we shall ride through the cosmos in a singularity of infinitely concentrated autism>>4558275>>4558303https://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/TheMadnessPlaceSerious question, is Sasha on any medication (or supposed to be) or magical equivalent?>>4560212you win at life, also this exists if you have a use for it. https://emlia.org/pmwiki/pub/web/WhatGoesUp.WhatGoesUp.html>>4566284https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0274518/ behold then 4chan's spiritual ancestor, from 1992>>4572408https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sqKqov0amik&ab_channel=doku>>4580882https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ve6z2w0ax-0
>>4582924No meds b/c daddy thinks that you are fine just the way you are.Just like I think you are fine anonymous poster ID: CsEJ4usH
>>4583258No one will see this, but I'd like to see a scene or something were our MC is put on meds and everyone is disturbed by how normal she is.
>>4583258QM can you link the thread I can't seem to find it in the archives
>>4583510http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/qstarchive/4553383/>>4583284Maybe one day.
>>4579732she should know about incest its one obstacle standing in the way of a generation ship and colonizing other planets