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OH SHIT NIGGA, you are SHOTASNIFFER. Eldest daughter of the skeleton villain LOLISNIFFER. After a long and arduous succesion war against your siblings, you now claim ownership of your family's island, as the leader of the UNITED SHOTA SNIFFING REPULIC.

Due to a series of shenanigans and misunderstandings, you found yourself accidentally saving the day multiple times. To the point that the Hero Association mistook you for an actual super hero! And THEN your ancient evil grandma threatens to plunge the entire world into darkness. Now you and your family must now take her down! On the moon!
>>
Rolled 19 (1d100)

>>4952419
Observe the situation.
>>
Rolled 96 (1d100)

>>4952419
>>4952429
You wish you weren't here right now.
>>
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>>4952430
Could totally be back at home. And enjoy an extra day of vacation right now. But this is your cross to bear.
>>
Rolled 5 (1d100)

>>4952439
ok, so literally everyone is fighting grandma at this point
>>
Rolled 44 (1d100)

>>4952439
Just get Lilly to take your place and sneak off.
>>
Rolled 27 (1d100)

>>4952439
"Lily, put me down. Being carried into battle is undiginfying."
>>
>>4952444
>Being carried into battle is undiginfying
depends on how you're being carried
>>
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>>4952443
>>
Rolled 3 (1d100)

>>4952447
>>4952440
>>
Rolled 81 (1d100)

>>4952447
We deserve another break.
>>
Rolled 96 (1d100)

>>4952447
>>4952451
If we don't stop Grandma there will be no places to take breaks in. Suck it up and get it done.
>>
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>>4952451
Poor choice of words

The day dream is ruined
>>
Rolled 48 (1d100)

>>4952456
sis are you imagining little boys again
>>
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>>4952458
Lilly has asked about your daydreaming habits, how do you respond
>>
Rolled 9 (1d100)

>>4952466
no, just daydreaming about how we should all be anywhere but here right now
>>
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>>4952467
"Hah, what a baby"
>>
Rolled 93 (1d100)

>>4952470
"I, I live among the creatures of the night
I haven't got the will to try and fight
Against a new tomorrow
So I guess I'll just believe it
That tomorrow never comes"
>>
>>4952470
Nou. Can you put me down now?
>>
Rolled 89 (1d100)

>>4952470
>>4952472
Fucking dice.
>>
>>4952470
Remind me to say that to you next time you try to run away from the pretty princess dress up contest
>>
>>4952472
>>4952476
Epic dice rolling skills guys
>>
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>>4952471
This thread is now DMCA'd by the Warner Music Group
>>
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>>4952478
We're special.
>>
Rolled 87 (1d100)

>>4952480
LOL

Have Other Betty "persuade" the executives to allow under Fair Use
>>
Rolled 56 (1d100)

>>4952480
The moon is not under the jurisdiction of Hollywood, their DMCA has no power hete.
>>
>>4952478
>>4952482
Remember to play on train tracks
>>
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>>4952483
After what is assuredly not extremely violence. The OP of this episode is now a Shotasniffer cover of the worldwide multi-format hit, "Self Control" as covered by Laura Branigan in 1984
>>
Rolled 69 (1d100)

>>4952502
Damn, we look fine
>>
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>>4952508
Aaaand there goes the budget
>>
Rolled 40 (1d100)

>>4952512
how about the budget for the fight against Grandma?
>>
Rolled 83 (1d100)

>>4952512
Crowdfund the continuation of the series on SkeletonGoGo!
>>
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>>4952517
>>
Rolled 25 (1d100)

>>4952525
Have Lilly yeet us by throwing us FIST first into Grandma.
>>
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Rolled 51 (1d100)

>>4952525
Humor/10

>>4952526
Being yeeted by Lily is a most honorable way of starting combat.
>>
Rolled 81 (1d100)

>>4952525
Have a "mysterious" benefactor give the funds after a certain set of circumstances.
>>
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Rolled 2809 (1d3000)

>>4952526
>>4952529
>>4952532
Anyway Roll 2d1200
>>
Rolled 693, 17 = 710 (2d1200)

>>4952537
nigga that's an autoloss
>>
Rolled 467, 143 = 610 (2d1200)

>>4952537
Using your loaded dice again, I see.
>>
Rolled 803, 565 = 1368 (2d1200)

>>4952537
We're fucking donezo, bois. It's over.
>>
>>4952537

Uraah!!!
>>
Rolled 1154, 626 = 1780 (2d1200)

>>4952546

Proper Rolling...
>>
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>>4952549
>>4952543
>>4952540
>>4952538
>>
Rolled 26 (1d100)

>>4952555
Backhanded bitch slap from Grandma.
>>
Rolled 12 (1d100)

>>4952555
"Uhh... Just kidding."
>>
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Rolled 2887 (1d3000)

>>4952557
Roll 2d1200
>>
Rolled 276, 510 = 786 (2d1200)

>>4952561
We're dead, no bones about it.
>>
Rolled 1104, 331 = 1435 (2d1200)

>>4952561
>>4952564

LMAO
Should have took Quattro's training more seriously.
>>
Rolled 706, 1183 = 1889 (2d1200)

>>4952561
damn, where's our family when we need them
>>
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>>4952566
>>
Rolled 40 (1d100)

>>4952571
EVERY ONE OF YOUR SIBLINGS GET ANGRY BY SEEING THAT
>>
Rolled 50 (1d100)

>>4952571
Jeanne unlocks her hidden potential, doing a Sailor Moon transformation from her bathing suit into an even skimpier outfit.
>>
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>>4952572
>>
Rolled 46 (1d100)

>>4952576
>>4952573
>>
Rolled 89 (1d100)

>>4952576
They still lose to Grandma even when powered by anger.
>>
Rolled 31 (1d100)

>>4952595
this but the opposite happens
>>
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>>4952595
The captcha is breaking my baaaallls
>>
Rolled 52 (1d100)

>>4952616
YOU WILL NOT DENY ME!

>>4952573
JEANNE UNLOCKS HER HIDDEN POTENTIAL AND DOES A SAILOR MOON TRANSFORMATION AFTER WITNESSING THIS DEVASTATION
>>
Rolled 71 (1d100)

>>4952616
Quick, we need to make our siblings AMGERY
"GRANDMA'S A VEGAN, SHE HATES ANIME, uhh, SHE NEVER LIKED YOU, AND SHE HATES ALCOHOL"
>>
Rolled 60 (1d100)

>>4952619
+1, in the name of the moon, she will punish you!
>>
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>>4952619
oh no suddenly op fell down the stairs
>>
Rolled 59 (1d100)

>>4952631
I WARNED YOU ABOUT STAIRS BRO
I TOLD YOU DOG
>>
Rolled 67 (1d100)

>>4952631
Are you OK, OP? You didn't drop your nuggies on the floor after that nasty fall, did you?
>>
Rolled 18 (1d100)

>>4952631
im tired of OP's shenanigans, he WILL deliver sigma anons magic girl request
>>
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>>4952637
Before OP can check, the fall caused OP to roll into the pins and get a strike!
>>
Rolled 11 (1d100)

>>4952648
Here comes a turkey to give you a trophy.
>>
Rolled 56 (1d100)

>>4952648
but can he roll a perfect game?
>>
Rolled 64 (1d100)

>>4952648
At least something good came of it. OP gets a trophy from scantily clad shadow girls for his excellent strike.
>>
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>>4952652
>>
Rolled 61 (1d100)

>>4952662
ok, back to the hefty skeleton PLOT
>>
Rolled 57 (1d100)

>>4952662
OP spends some time improving his bowling game as we pan back to the ongoing fight on the moon.
>>
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>>4952666
>>
Rolled 12 (1d100)

>>4952677
Everyone stops and stares straight at the Fourth Wall
>>
Rolled 92 (1d100)

>>4952677
In a shocking twist, Anons are playing as Grandma for one post. After she smacks a bitch, of course.
>>
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>>4952684
GASP!
>>
Rolled 37 (1d100)

>>4952688
Just this one post.
Meanwhile, Shotasniffer devises a plan to take out Grandma.
>>
Rolled 24 (1d100)

>>4952688
Commit war crimes.
>>
Rolled 33 (1d100)

>>4952688
Get our googly-eyes checked out. Something ain't right.
>>
>>4952695
>>4952688
Shit, nevermind. It's a bird/devil shadow.
>>
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>>4952690
Aight boss, what's the plan?
>>
Rolled 7 (1d100)

>>4952700
Is Dad awake now? Let's ask him what he did last time to seal Grandma away.
>>
Rolled 27 (1d100)

>>4952700
Challenge Grandma to a Karaoke contest to decide the fate of the world. No magic shenanigans, best of seven. Internationally broadcasted and call in votes to determine winners. Sell ad space for this historic event and make billions.
>>
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Rolled 9 (1d100)

>>4952704
Roll 2d100
>>
Rolled 24, 57 = 81 (2d100)

>>4952711
heh
>>
>>4952711
>>4952713
nice roll
>>
Rolled 35, 45 = 80 (2d100)

>>4952711
>>
Rolled 47, 63 = 110 (2d100)

>>4952711
>>
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>>4952719
>>4952715
>>4952713
You have a feeling Dad may be conscious again. Maybe your family can distract grandma enough for you to get to him
>>
Rolled 57 (1d100)

>>4952724
yes, send wave after wave of your own men while you get to dad
>>
Rolled 81 (1d100)

>>4952724
Them and the sudden stream of reinforcements who came to unite to get her as one to fight off the threat to all of existence.
Because, well, threat to all of existence.
>>
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>>4952726
Having regained consciousness, Dad dragged himself to behind a boulder to get his bearings. It was then that he noticed the sudden arrival of multiple heroes

"COME! HEROES! LET US TAKE DOWN THIS VILE FIEND!"

"WE MUST ASSIST SHOTASNIFFER! THE GREATEST OF US ALL!"

"FOR SHOTASNIFFER! FOR JUSTICE!"

"..the fuck"
>>
Rolled 33 (1d100)

>>4952734
Also villains aka "those other assholes"
>>
Rolled 12 (1d100)

>>4952734
Purposefully put the heroes in the line of fire so they shut up. Prepare for an explanation later.
>>
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>>4952735
Then the Villain League arrives to lend their help

"WE'LL PUT ASIDE OUT DIFFERENCES FOR NOW! PUNY HEROES!"

"YOU'LL NEVER WIN WITHOUT OUR HELP!"

"CAN'T CONQUER THE WORLD IF THERE WON'T BE WORLD TO CONQUER!"

"...those assholes still owes me money"
>>
>>4952734
MOM: "its just a phase"
>>
Rolled 56 (1d100)

>>4952740
Tap Dad on the shoulder.
>>
Rolled 57 (1d100)

>>4952740
Stay hidden as you think to yourself what you did to seal her for the first time
>>4952743
ah yes, surprising dad, what a way to get yourself backhanded
>>
Rolled 32 (1d100)

>>4952740
Since both heroes and villains will recognize dad, offer a Chosen One disguise to blend in.
>>
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>>4952748
"What was that crap about Shotasniffer being a big hero or something?...Nevermind that, how did I seal mom the first time? That beating she gave me did a number on the ol' noggin', can't seem to recall it right now. Damnit"
>>
Rolled 46 (1d100)

>>4952755
Punch Dad in the back of the head.
>>
Rolled 56 (1d100)

>>4952755
>>4952757
I see we decided to choose suicide
>>
>>4952759
>>4952757
To help jog his memory, of course.
>>
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>>4952759
>>
Rolled 41 (1d100)

>>4952764
Upon which you are interrupted by Shadowboss kicking your dad in the face
>>
Rolled 20 (1d100)

>>4952764
Sorry Dad, it's gotta be this way.
>>
Rolled 43 (1d100)

>>4952764
Mom and Other Grandma save you the trouble.
>>
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>>4952766
"AHA! FOUND YOU! ASSHOLE!"

"The fu--"
>>
Rolled 93 (1d100)

>>4952770
DO YOU REMEMBER NOW, ASSHOLE?
>>
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>>4952771
"OH YOU WANNA DO THIS RIGHT NOW?! SURE! Square up, Shadowboss. You're my father-in-law but I'm still gonna beat your ass"
>>
Rolled 92 (1d100)

>>4952780
Might as well as the rest of your family that came (Simon, Fug, Greg, Jojo) if they knew anything, your dad is going to be occupied.
>>
Rolled 59 (1d100)

>>4952780
Interrupt the fight with your imposing presence. There's a bigger threat going on right now and we need Dad to remember how he sealed up Grandma last time.
>>
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>>4952781
"Oh hey Shotasniffer. What are you doing here?" Oh look it's uncle Greg
>>
Rolled 83 (1d100)

>>4952790
How'd you guys seal Grandma away last time?
>>
Rolled 100 (1d100)

>>4952790
Uh, do you know anything about how to seal mom for eternity so that she will never threaten the universe as we know it ever again? Asking for a friend.
>>
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>>4952792
"Seal away your mom?! What did she do?"
>>
Rolled 13 (1d100)

>>4952799
I mean grandma, the one we're fighting now
>>
Rolled 69 (1d100)

>>4952799
That anon's clearly crazy, Greg.
It's Grandma that we need to know aobut.
>>
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>>4952804
"Well, you see....

A. ...to seal away an ancient evil such as hers requires a massive ritual and a suitable "container". I've been preparing the ingredients this whole time"

B. ....to seal away an ancient evil such as hers requires a container and also a huge amount of blood sacrifices. Like a lot of blood sacrifices"

C. ....I met your dad way after he sealed away your grandma so I dunno."

D. All of the above

E. None of the above

F. Some of the above

G. [free space]
>>
Rolled 4 (1d100)

>>4952810
B. FOR THE BLOOD GOD
wow it's a good thing we brought all these heroes and villains to the moon
>>
Rolled 94 (1d100)

>>4952810
Maybe if you gather enough Garlic you can re-seal her again? That's what Skeletons are weak against, right?
>>
>>4952812
That's vampires, and no, your hatred of garlic doesn't count.
>>
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>>4952812
>>4952816
"Just because you hate garlic doesn't mean it's a skeleton weakness"
>>
>>4952819
>>4952810
A, B and C
Greg has been preparing the ingredients, but 1. It requires a lot of blood and 2. Only dad knows the exact full ritual
>>
Rolled 67 (1d100)

>>4952819
>>4952822
>>
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>>4952824
"Anyway, your dad entrusted me with a list of ingredients for the ritual in case his mom ever got out again. But what to do with them, only he knows the full details......it doesn't have garlic in it stop making that face"
>>
Rolled 7 (1d100)

>>4952832
"He does provide a number for the sacrifice."
Oh good, what is i-
"Kill like a thousand little boys, probably"
WHAT.
>>
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>>4952837
"Well the wording he used was "eh, like a thousand dudes or something. Best if they're young. More energy that way"
>>
Rolled 5 (1d100)

>>4952842
And the footnote says "kill a million just to be sure" and "look I don't write the rules just fucking choke the fuckers"
>>
Rolled 9 (1d100)

>>4952842
that explains why dad made a secret island and sired thousands of children...
>>
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>>4952845
"Also ponies. We need like a thousand dead ponies. Maybe we could raid a farm or something. PS: Don't let Shotasniffer read this part"
>>
Rolled 61 (1d100)

>>4952852
>>4952847
"I told you we're not using that ritual. At all."
>>
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>>4952857
"Also my children are for a completely different, unrelated project. Don't worry Greg. P.S.S: Definitely don't let Shotasniffer read this part"
>>
Rolled 67 (1d100)

>>4952860
Guess we'll have to beat up Dad after we finish beating up Grandma then. This day could've gone better.
>>
Rolled 71 (1d100)

>>4952860
At this point you're not surprised.
"Greg, we're not killing kids just to satisfy his bloodlust"
"well it's actually more like an appeasement for the person to be sealed AND the person who was supposed to do that got arrested"
>>
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>>4952865
Reaaaalllyyy?
"When I asked your dad about it, he said that it's not like he WANTS to sacrifice thousands of innocent souls, it's just what the ritual required. Plus he said "BEST if young" so it's like we HAVE to use children. That's why I didn't brought any with me. We could just use the heroes and villains fighting your grandma"
>>
Rolled 88 (1d100)

>>4952872
"I'm very sure I explicitly told you NOT to use the ritual when we discussed this. Also you just said that only Lolisniffer knows the full thing so we don't even know if it'll work with them" - Shadowlady
>>
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>>4952876
"Gah! When did you get there?!"
>>
Rolled 21 (1d100)

lets sacrifice dads super evil soul instead of a 1000 shitty souls
>>
Rolled 50 (1d100)

>>4952880
Thrown clear. Also we all agreed to seal her in a mini-dimension where there's no chance of her breaking out instead of the very inefficient ritual that Lolisniffer forgots to state needs daily sacrifices.
>>
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>>4952885
"Pretty sure there's no daily sacrifices needed.....plus i was looking forward to cleaning up both the competition and opposition in one fell swoop"

"Greg"

"nyeh"
>>
Rolled 100 (1d100)

>>4952891
Well what then, it's not like we have another pl-
"Coolio, everyone!"
Oh no.
>>
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>>4952899
"HEY MOM! I HEARD SOMETHING ABOUT USING THE HEROES AND VILLAINS BLOOD TO SEAL UP GRANDMA! DONT WORRY! IM ON IT!"

"BOBBY!"
>>
Rolled 82 (1d100)

>>4952907
GROAN
>>
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>>4952909
Somehow, your body moved on its own.

And also it's 5AM over here so OP gotta go take a nap to wageslave later. Toodles. Continue when it continues

updates be here: https://twitter.com/notapaladin
>>
>>4952918
Thanks for the run.
>>
>>4952930
Perhaps you'll get your magical girl next time
you wont tho
>>
>>4952940
maybe he will
>>
>>4952956
maybe not
>>
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>>4956065
hmmmm
>>
Rolled 49 (1d100)

>>4956114
Hmmmm harder
>>
Rolled 69 (1d100)

>>4956114
Do a flip, OP
>>
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>>4956125
>>
Rolled 57 (1d100)

>>4956130
So, how's the budget for this session looking like?
>>
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>>4956135
>>
Rolled 15 (1d100)

>>4956140
To compensate, Bobby will now be replaced by a lamp
>>
>>4956140
>>4956141
A most reasonable suggestion.
>>
Rolled 35 (1d100)

>>4956140
....*Slaps lips* You know what we need rake in some dough? A new character in the mess...but we don't have the budget...Eh, just dig up some old one, the kids won't even know. Zebra's good, no one remembers him.
>>
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>>4956141
>>
Rolled 19 (1d100)

>>4956151
Everything is better now.
>>4956149
NO.
>>
Rolled 52 (1d100)

>>4956151
Throw that lamp out, it's wasting electricity and cutting in to the very limited budget we have.
>>
Rolled 75 (1d100)

>>4956155
DO YOU HAVE ANY BETTER IDEAS??!?
>>4956151
THAT'S NOT EVEN A LAMP! THAT'S A CARDBOARD CUTOUT OF A CARDBOARD CUTOUT OF A LAMP!!! WE DON'T HAVE ANY OTHER OPTIONS!!!!
>>
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>>4956156
>>
Rolled 26 (1d100)

>>4956164
No wtf he's one of us. Don't be a dick
>>
Rolled 49 (1d100)

>>4956164
With the trash taken care of, we can now return to Funny Skeletons vs Cranky Grandma on the moon
>>
Rolled 12 (1d100)

>>4956164
>>4956167
LAUGH
>>
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>>4956167
>>
Rolled 83 (1d100)

>>4956176
QUATTRO'S DEAD!
>>
Rolled 96 (1d100)

>>4956176
With Bobby incapacitated we can start planning our counterattack against Grandma.
>>
>>4956179
"right. So. New plan. We have to banish her into another dimension.....theregoesmyplantosealherinsidethemoonalongsidealltheheroes grumble grumble grumble"
>>
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>>4956187
>>
Rolled 31 (1d100)

>>4956192
But what do we use
>>
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>>4956194
"Yeah, well--"
>>
Rolled 24 (1d100)

>>4956207
Ah shoot, we at least need someone to stop them fighting each other
>>
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>>4956208
ALRIGHT TIME FOR YOU TO SHINE
>>
Rolled 87 (1d100)

>>4956212
NOPE,. RATHER FIGHT GRANDMA THAN DAD, GO BOBBY!
>>
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>>4956215
"w-what?! WAIT WAIT WAIT"
>>
Rolled 54 (1d100)

>>4956220
"Bobby, use Headbutt!"
Proceed to launch Bobby with maximum force towards Dad.
>>
Rolled 91 (1d100)

>>4956220
don't worry, you just have to talk him out of it
>>
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>>4956225
"FUCKIN HOW?!"
>>
Rolled 54 (1d100)

>>4956234
Talk to them until you piss of everyone like you always do
>>4956223
>>
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>>4956235
"AAAAAAAAA"
>>
Rolled 58 (1d100)

>>4956239
PLAY BALL
>>
Rolled 39 (1d100)

>>4956239
Screw ball corner pocket Red heel drop extraordinaire ATTACK!
>>
Rolled 19 (1d100)

>>4956239
>>4956244
Dad steps up to the plate, bat ready to score a home run.
>>
>>4956247
Classic Dad.
>>
File: 1.png (22 KB, 500x500)
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Rolled 576 (1d2000)

>>4956244
ROLL 2d1200
>>
>>4956251
Why?
>>
Rolled 90, 959 = 1049 (2d1200)

>>4956251
>>4956255
Because.
>>
Rolled 188, 108 = 296 (2d1200)

>>4956251
Roll for seemingly no reason? Gotcha.
>>
>>4956258
nothing ever goes right for the Bobster
>>
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>>4956255
because i like the rattling sound the dice makes

>>4956258
>>
Rolled 49 (1d100)

>>4956260
Someone has to be the punching bag.

>>4956262
AND IT'S GOING, AND GOING, AND GOING, AND IT'S GONE! *Star Twinkle*
>>
Rolled 73 (1d100)

>>4956262
OH IT BEAMED GRANDMA RIGHT IN THE FACE
>>
Rolled 5 (1d100)

>>4956262
Look out SPACE DEER!?
>>
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>>4956268
>>
Rolled 14 (1d100)

>>4956276
WHICH IDIOT HIT ME IN THE FACE
>>
Rolled 5 (1d100)

>>4956279
Zebra
>>
File: 1.png (6 KB, 500x500)
6 KB
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>>4956279
Dad has a look on his face that says "oh right, i was supposed to deal with my mother and not waste time punching my father-in-law"
>>
Rolled 45 (1d100)

>>4956286
He then throws Shadowboss to this mom
>>
Rolled 43 (1d100)

>>4956286
Then punch self in face!
>>
Rolled 71 (1d100)

>>4956286
In a continuation of the shocking twist, Anons are once again playing as Grandma. This time for two posts, as she is getting better at siphoning the stream of Anons Power away from Shotasniffer and her siblings.
>>
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>>4956289
"ayo hol up"
>>
Rolled 80 (1d100)

>>4956297
stop acting like a nigger, nigger
>>
Rolled 31 (1d100)

>>4956297
Rude>>4956300
>>4956297
Anyways find a new game from the attic
>>
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>>4956300
ANON NO! YOU'RE GONNA BE CANCELLED ON TWITTER DOT COM!
>>
Rolled 92 (1d100)

>>4956303
Quick find the game that will make you seem like a woke God!
Lesbo-transeritops and the Dino boyz!
>>
Rolled 45 (1d100)

>>4956303
Oh sure, when Lolisniffer says it people laugh as he kills like a hundred people
>>
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>>4956305
Surely this will save anon's internet career!
>>
Rolled 50 (1d100)

>>4956313
Oh no its MISS SOGGY KNEE AND THE TURFS! BETTER LUBE UP THAT SLIP AND SLID AND BUTTER UP THOSE ASSHOLES!
>>
Rolled 21 (1d100)

>>4956313
Meanwhile, Lolisniffer Von Jewburner throws a black man to his mom
>>
File: 1.png (6 KB, 500x500)
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>>4956316
NOOOOOO! ANOOOOON
>>
Rolled 44 (1d100)

>>4956320
And then a giant penis rises from the earth while the song plays "tumbling down" from end of Eva.
>>
Rolled 87 (1d100)

>>4956320
>>4956317
>>
>>4956320
How long has this particular game has been going
>>
>>4956327
2 years because OP is old and weak

also because work keeps piling up
>>
>>4956330
It's more like 1 and a half maybe
>>
>>4956332
It's actually 50 years
>>
>>4956334
51 and a half
>>
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>>4956324
Lolisniffer Von JEWBURNER throws a (literal) black man at his mother!

He is many things, but definitely not racist
>>
Rolled 26 (1d100)

>>4956336
Paid for by friends of Lolisniffer Von Jewburner
>>
Rolled 16 (1d100)

>>4956336
And he doesn't burn jews it was just an unfortunate mistake on the last name application, his real last name is Johnborno
>>
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>>4956337
And our spokesman, Greg! Definitely no ulterior motives here!
>>
Rolled 16 (1d100)

>>4956344
Now Greg enforces no more racism from anons from here on out. Or it's GAME OVER! (see how you fuckers last)
>>
Rolled 32 (1d100)

>>4956344
Now let's go back to the definitely not racist action
>>
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>>4956347
>>
Rolled 19 (1d100)

>>4956353
Looks like someone's in for another round of pain
>>
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>>4956357
>>
Rolled 27 (1d100)

>>4956353
Greg's mom will put a stop to this!
>>
Rolled 44 (1d100)

>>4956365
Then all of a sudden out of no where and for no reason a cammeo from the time traveling time hopper Gunfu Cowboy
>>
Rolled 38 (1d100)

>>4956365
"NOW, START THE TRANSPORTER"
"what"1
>>
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>>4956368
"Heya kids. It's me. The cameo making rootin' shootin' kung fu cowboy. The Man with no Game. Now that's it for my cameo. I'm gonna go back home and get drunk during a morning. See ya"

Then he disappears
>>
Rolled 95 (1d100)

>>4956376
Ah that made everyone happy and stop fighting. THE END!
>>
Rolled 88 (1d100)

>>4956376
"QUICK, PUSH THEM TO THAT CONVENIENT PORTAL THAT CAMEO OPENED UP"
"THEM?"
>>
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>>4956378
Anon I know you like cowboys but you gotta control your fetish
>>
Rolled 63 (1d100)

>>4956382
>>4956379
Cowboys got ruined with Texas and SRQ3 anyway
>>
Rolled 96 (1d100)

>>4956382
AMERICA! MOTHER FUCKER WE WILL FREE THE FUCK OUTTA YOU!
>>
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>>4956384
Sure sure, alright pal
>>
Rolled 11 (1d100)

>>4956389
>>4956383
>>
Rolled 18 (1d100)

>>4956389
More freedom please
>>
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>>4956391
Best I could do is a handshake and this hotdog
>>
Rolled 55 (1d100)

>>4956393
TOO MUCH AMERICA, IT'S TOO MUCH
>>
Rolled 77 (1d100)

>>4956393
What is this!? FREEDOM FOR ANTS!?
>>
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>>4956396
Yes
>>
Rolled 13 (1d100)

>>4956398
Wait a minute... that ant is from Mexico ain't he!? Stealing all our ant jobs!
>>
Rolled 68 (1d100)

>>4956398
Go back to the show
>>
>>4956400
We had a show?
>>
>>4956403
We had one until someone blew their money on cowboys after SRQ3 failed
>>
>>4956405
SRQ3? What's that? The budget was made with cowboy printed money. Look at the bills, cowboys all over it.
>>
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>>4956400
Freedom Ant was accidentally crush by Lolisniffer while fighting.

RIP
>>
Rolled 55 (1d100)

>>4956408
While they fight, the other Shadowlady starts her plan to seal both- I mean Grandma in another dimension
>>
Rolled 91 (1d100)

>>4956408
Good riddance, he thought he can chimichanga his way into my freedom he's got another thing coming. Cuz he is dead. Also zebra falls into the fight for some reason.
>>
>>4956413
>Zebra
we all need a bit of comedy in our lives
>>
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>>4956413
"AHAHA! GUESS WHO'S BACK BITCHES! IT'S TIME FOR ZEBRA TO--"
>>
Rolled 49 (1d100)

>>4956418
>>4956412
>>
Rolled 46 (1d100)

>>4956418
What program do you use to draw and upload op?

Also the fight rages on to a point they are bouncing off blows in mid air!
>>
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>>4956420
"Alright, let's go ahead with the plan then! Let's send the--I mean, HER, to another dimension that she can't escape from"

>>4956421
paint tool Sai because i'm a scrub
>>
Rolled 31 (1d100)

>>4956427
Send him to the DIGITAL WORLD!
>>
Rolled 23 (1d100)

>>4956427
>>4956428
>>
>>4956428
Wait, him?
>>
>>4956431
MwahahahahHahaha
>>
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>>4956428
"Him?"

"I mean her! Yes. Shotasniffer's grandma! And Lolisniffer's mom. Totally not Lolisniffer himself. Of course"
>>
Rolled 95 (1d100)

>>4956438
It's not like it'll backfire and seal lolisniffer himself by pure accident instead!
>>
>>4956440
Just makes sure he doesn't slip a disc.
>>
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>>4956440
"why, that would be terrible, indeed! Who would want that to happen? ehehe"
>>
Rolled 58 (1d100)

>>4956444
Shotasniffer starts sweating even more
>>
Rolled 19 (1d100)

>>4956444
Boop
>>
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6 KB
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>>4956445
>>
Rolled 15 (1d100)

>>4956449
"All we need to do is to just zap her with this portal ray"
>>
Rolled 72 (1d100)

>>4956449
Ok zap already the wait is literally killing someone right now
>>
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>>4956451
"That's right! Thanks to Dad waking up, Grandma is focused on beating him now! This allowed me and a bunch of tech-type heroes and villains to harness Rasputin's void powers and put it into this ray gun! It has enough charge for 1 shot to create a one way portal the outer realms!"
>>
Rolled 84 (1d100)

>>4956455
DO IT MARIAN
>>
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>>4956457
WILL MARIAN FINALLY SAVE THE DAY?

WILL THIS QUEST FINALLY END?

WILL QUATTRO FINALLY GET TO BE COOL?

FIND OUT NEXT TIME THREAD CONTINUES. OP GOTTA GO NOW. FUCK

updates b here: https://twitter.com/notapaladin
>>
Rolled 33 (1d100)

>>4956459
THE RIDE NEVER ENDS
>>
>>4956459
I like how when Shotasniffer starts losing control of the situation and fights against people more threatening than her, she loses her hat
>>
>>4956758
Maybe we should look into a technology that lets the hat stay on during stressful situations
>>
>>4956459
>WILL MARIAN FINALLY SAVE THE DAY?
We're not even pretending to be villains anymore
>>
Considering how badly Shadowmom was raised by her "I just went out for some cigarettes" dad, of course she would think Lolisniffer's parenting skills is the apex
>>
>>4957968
I dunno what you're talking about. Lolsiniffer has won multiple Dad of the Year awards and commemorative mugs

This messageis Paid for by friends of Lolisniffer Von Jewburner
>>
>>4958946
when thread to zap Loli- I mean Grandma to the Outer Realms where they'll definitely not get stronger and break out
>>
>>4958948
prolly tomorrow
>>
>>4958949
so 50 years
>>
I wonder what skelly.island.2 would.have been like with any character other than shotasniffer winning SI1
>>
I wish this wrapped up. We could play a new quest
>>
>>4960168
It should wrap up within this thread
>>
Someone can post the archive link of this quest? I'm sad I didn't look in /qst/ before to find this out, i'm laughing alot with this shit.
>>
>>4960848
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=notapaladin
>>
>>4958949
A whole lotta tomorrow
>>
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>>4960988
Yes but consider this:

OP is bad at timekeeping
>>
Rolled 75 (1d100)

>>4961027
True, now go back to funny skeletons
>>
Rolled 69 (1d100)

>>4961027
buy a watch
>>
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12 KB
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>>4961030
>>
Rolled 31 (1d100)

>>4961049
Can he do it?
>>
Rolled 5 (1d100)

>>4961049
He fucks up the shot.
>>
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>>4961050
Alright Marian. It's time for you to shine, baby! Get in there and give em the ol' one-two!
>>
Rolled 91 (1d100)

>>4961057
You just have to hit her with that one shot, that's all
>>
Rolled 73 (1d100)

>>4961057
>>4961060
Just don't think about all the times you fucked up before and you'll do fine.
>>
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>>4961060
All it takes is one shot, Marian! One shot and you'll be hailed as a cool dude! Also because we literally only have 1 shot so if you miss we're ultra fucked. No pressure
>>
Rolled 100 (1d100)

>>4961073
NOTHING WILL GO WRONG
>>
File: 1.png (13 KB, 500x500)
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>>4961074
YEA! EVERYTHING'S COMING UP MARIAN!

just dont fuck up
>>
Rolled 23 (1d100)

>>4961079
FIRE ALREADY
>>
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>>4961084
>>
Rolled 94 (1d100)

>>4961097
It hits-
>>
Rolled 50 (1d100)

>>4961097
Cool dude Marian opens the Void Portal just behind Grandma
>>
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>>4961098
GASP!

HIT WHAT ANON?!
>>
Rolled 42 (1d100)

>>4961108
Shotasniffer
>>
Rolled 37 (1d100)

>>4961108
Obviously he hitsomeone not grandma
>>
File: 1.png (8 KB, 500x500)
8 KB
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>>4961109
>>
>>4961109
MARIAN
>>
Rolled 99 (1d100)

>>4961114
He's joking
You actually hit Dad only
Wait uh oh
>>
Rolled 70 (1d100)

>>4961114
>>4961119
Yeah, you wouldn't actually shoot your sister TOTALLY BY MISTAKE to get back at her for all the horrible shit she's done to you. You just hit Dad instead.
>>
File: 1.png (20 KB, 500x500)
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>>4961119
"THE FUUUUUCK"
>>
Rolled 22 (1d100)

>>4961136
"Uh, oops."
Your mom and Greg angrily react to this.
The rest are unsure.
>>
Rolled 14 (1d100)

>>4961142
"That's our Marian"
*Laugh track*
>>
File: 1.png (8 KB, 500x500)
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>>4961142
Mom double face palms in seething disappointment.

While Greg tells Marian that he'll no longer give him gifts for christmas

Devastating
>>
Rolled 40 (1d100)

>>4961146
we still need that laugh track tho
>>
Rolled 70 (1d100)

>>4961146
While all these shenanigans are going on, the USSR Mobile Construction Vehicle that arrived with the latest batch of reinforcements deploys and starts the construction of a Forward Base.

https://youtu.be/1DAOdnymNZM?t=16
>>
Rolled 77 (1d100)

>>4961146
>>4961149
Helpfully provided by Grandma
>>
File: 1.png (26 KB, 500x500)
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>>4961151
"That's Marian for you. AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA"

"MARIAN?! MARIAN DID THIS?!"
>>
Rolled 51 (1d100)

>>4961153
anger helps dad to overcome sucking forces of portal to outer realms, cause SOMEONE NEEDS SERIOUS SPANKING
>>
>>4961153
Welp, it was nice knowing you, Marian, thank you for your sacrifice.
"Mom, Simon said the decorations are ready for the "SO LONG LOLISNIFFER" party."
"Not now, Jojo."
>>
Rolled 99 (1d100)

>>4961153
>>4961155>>4961154
>>
File: 1.png (15 KB, 500x500)
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>>4961157
"I think he's mad"
>>
Rolled 82 (1d100)

>>4961185
you are now Marian
Objective: Survive
>>
Rolled 87 (1d100)

>>4961185
Shotasniffer signals Marian to run far, far away.
Now.
>>
File: 1.png (19 KB, 500x500)
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>>4961188
Ironically, now it's Grandma's turn to hold Dad back
>>
Rolled 93 (1d100)

>>4961202
As his last act before he's sealed away into the outer realms, Lolisniffer uses up all his power for the most horrible punishment inflicted on Marian.
It is too horrible to describe.
>>
Rolled 100 (1d100)

>>4961202
she doesn't do very good job of it
>>
>>4961210
No. No she doesn't
>>
File: 1.png (77 KB, 500x500)
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>>4961210
>>
Rolled 44 (1d100)

>>4961221
"...who was it that said Lolisniffer's mom was going to destroy everything?"
"...Lolisniffer."
"I think the source was a bit biased."
>>
Rolled 53 (1d100)

>>4961221
>grabs popcorn and 3D glasses
It's our favorite episode of Lolisniffer getting shit done.
>>
>>4961225
Recommended watching distance: Not in this plane of existence.
>>
File: 1.png (11 KB, 500x500)
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>>4961225
"Lighten up sis. Dad's now motivated enough to deal with grandma. That means we win! And all it costed was 1 Marian. Want some popcorn?"
>>
Rolled 28 (1d100)

>>4961238
At this point every single hero and villain across the universe stop fighting each other and start fearing for the end.
>>
File: 1.png (11 KB, 500x500)
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>>4961242
"Dunno why those other guys are screaming tho, we're winning"
>>
Rolled 50 (1d100)

>>4961248
Luke tries to calm people down by opening up a confectionary stand and selling tickets to The Greatest Spanking of All Time.

The stand is mostly sausages and sausage accessories
>>
Rolled 96 (1d100)

>>4961248
>>4961251
While fearing for his life
>>
Rolled 45 (1d100)

>>4961248
Quattro knows what'sup
>>
File: 1.png (18 KB, 500x500)
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>>4961252
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAthanks for the hotdog, how much was it againAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"

"AAAAAAAAAAabout 3.50 my guyAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA"
>>
Rolled 92 (1d100)

>>4961263
...did anyone bother asking why Lolisniffer sealed his mom?
>>
>>4961263
There is always time for business. Luke is probably one of the most competent sons there is.
>>4961266
I mean if you really want to know, go and ask.
Right now.
>>
Rolled 93 (1d100)

>>4961263
>>4961268
fug
>>
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>>4961266
"She was gonna eat everything and leave Earth a husk of a planet. Anyway. Calm down, children. Your dad's just a bit cranky right now. Just let him work off some steam against your grandma. Nothing to worry about.......completely unrelated, but where did Marian go"
>>
Rolled 47 (1d100)

>>4961273
Point in general direction of flashy Marian's retreat
>>
Rolled 78 (1d100)

>>4961273
He's on the ground over there in the fetal position. I think he's completely given up entirely.
>>
Rolled 15 (1d100)

>>4961274
>>4961273
But just vaguely enough to not reveal his location
>>
File: 1.png (6 KB, 500x500)
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>>4961279
>>
Rolled 21 (1d100)

>>4961286
Quattro thinks everything would be smooth sailing from now on.
This lasts until a stray blast from dad hits him
>>
File: 1.png (17 KB, 500x500)
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>>4961288
"I-it's fine....I-i get hit by random debris and stray shots e-every battle..."
>>
Rolled 59 (1d100)

>>4961293
Grandma is thrown clear, drained of power as Lolisniffer starts advancing
>>
File: 1.png (16 KB, 500x500)
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>>4961296
"MMmmmmmM--Mmm--MOMMY!"
>>
>>4961300
It's gonna be okay, Marian. Push him towards Dad

NEXT EPISODE PREVIEW
MARIAN DIES IN LAVA
>>
Rolled 43 (1d100)

>>4961300
Mom saves marian
>>
Rolled 14 (1d100)

>>4961300
So on the one hand, your grandma has been defeated and now can't continue with her plan.
On the other hand, your dad might do far worse and is now on track to set the entire universe under his control
>>
File: 1.png (16 KB, 500x500)
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>>4961304
>>
Rolled 28 (1d100)

>>4961309
kissu
>>
Rolled 69 (1d100)

>>4961309
"Look, it was an accident? He's jus-"
INARTICULATE YELLING
"...what did you call me?"
>>
Rolled 99 (1d100)

>>4961309
>>4961312
>69
nice
>>
File: 1.png (28 KB, 500x500)
28 KB
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>>4961313
>>
Rolled 70 (1d100)

>>4961314
Nice
>>
Rolled 34 (1d100)

>>4961314
now mom kisses dad
>>
>>4961314
>>4961314
niccc
>>
Rolled 95 (1d100)

>>4961319
>>
File: 1.png (30 KB, 500x500)
30 KB
30 KB PNG
>>4961316
>>
Rolled 42 (1d100)

>>4961324
Back to more inarticulate yelling from an ancient language
>>
Rolled 69 (1d100)

>>4961317
go mom go
>>
Rolled 82 (1d100)

>>4961324
while we all were distracted - everything was settled down off screen
>>4961330
nice
>>
File: 1.png (22 KB, 500x500)
22 KB
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>>4961330
>>
Rolled 61 (1d100)

>>4961337
Oh dear, it's the rematch
>>
Rolled 5 (1d100)

>>4961337
No one wants to see their parents make out but thats what happens
>>
Rolled 6 (1d100)

>>4961337
now hug
>>
File: 1.png (11 KB, 500x500)
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>>4961340
"Honey, you're scaring the kids"

*grumble grumble*
>>
Rolled 24 (1d100)

>>4961372
Now go to your realm for 3 years and think about what've you done.
"Yes dear."
>>
File: 1.png (11 KB, 500x500)
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>>4961375
"lmao dad ur grounded"
>>
Rolled 48 (1d100)

>>4961377
Lolisniffer bashes Quattro's and Marian's heads together before embarking on his now-four year banishment to the Outer Realms.
>>
File: 1.png (9 KB, 500x500)
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>>4961380
The Von Jewburner resident's version of sending dad to sleep on the couch
>>
Rolled 46 (1d100)

>>4961384
"HOORAY, LOLISNIFFER'S GONE!"
"I'LL CUT OUT YOUR ENTRAILS AND USE THEM FOR THE NEXT LITTLE GIR-"
"FIVE YEARS."
>>
File: 1.png (8 KB, 500x500)
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>>4961386
"......HONEY"

"WHAT NOW?!"

"...I don't have portal opening powers"
>>
Rolled 94 (1d100)

>>4961389
Forgive him, he is trying his best to be a good dad
he'll just sleep on a couch for a year
>>
Rolled 88 (1d100)

>>4961389
"Don't worry. Let Mommy open it for you."
"WAIT WHA-"
>>
>>4961392
Greg no, he needs this
>>
>>4961395
No, he doesn't.
It's a pain to deliver cookies to Outer Realm
Also I need him for poker evenings
>>
>>4961399
No cookies, and you could play poker with him through video call
>>
>>4961402
but it's not the saaaaaaaame
>no cookies
how dare you
>>
File: 1.png (8 KB, 500x500)
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>>4961392
"Fine. Come here you big baby. But yous still need to sleep on the couch for misbehaving"

"mmmmmrmmrmmrmrm"

"OH NO HE'S NOT GONE"

"WE'RE DOOMED!"

"THE APOCALYPSE HAS BEEN RESTARTED"

"Shut up over there"
>>
Rolled 19 (1d100)

>>4961405
>>4961393
>>
Rolled 34 (1d100)

>>4961405
awwww
>>
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>>4961407
AND NOW

OP gotta go for about 5-6 hours. Will continue when back. toodles
>>
>>4961410
Sleep is for the weak anyway
>>
>>4961410
thanks for bread so far, op
>>
>>4961410
5-6 hours until the finale?
>>
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>>4961610
perhaps
>>
Rolled 59 (1d100)

>>4961660
!
>>
Rolled 14 (1d100)

>>4961660
The finale is postponed due to budget limitations
>>
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>>4961663
>>
Rolled 55 (1d100)

>>4961672
Anon goes to an online Chilean Terrace Farming Forum to denounce OP for being a fag.
>>
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>>4961674
>>
Rolled 53 (1d100)

>>4961677
Back to episode
>>
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>>4961680
>>
Rolled 50 (1d100)

>>4961684
Wow Betty I didn't know you posted on the Burmese Jademaking forum
>>
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>>4961687
"please don't judge me"
>>
>>4961698
Mom and Dad are busy smooching it up after making up, visibly disgusting the children.
>>
Rolled 65 (1d100)

>>4961698
Also you filmed Quattro and Marian getting their heads bashed in, didn't you. This is completely disrespectful-
"AHAHAHAHAHA!"
And so is sending it to your brothers and sisters.
>>
Rolled 53 (1d100)

>>4961698
>>4961703
I swear that Capital D is going to be the end of me.
>>
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>>4961704
"But c'mon. You gotta admit it was a little bit funny"

"Betty"

"C'mooooooon"
>>
Rolled 46 (1d100)

>>4961716
>>4961703
Or, rather, everyone.
>>
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>>4961721
Mom and Dad starts FURIOUSLY making out in front of everyone.

"Greg?"

"Yeah?"

"Kill me"
>>
Rolled 88 (1d100)

>>4961734
No, we all suffer together. Besides, your wife still hasn't beaten you up for having a bastard child without her knowledge.
>>
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>>4961739
"i'd like to go back to being dead in the outer realms now"
>>
Rolled 97 (1d100)

>>4961748
There's not time for that now, here comes Grandma!
>>
Rolled 82 (1d100)

>>4961698
Cut to Jeanne out of nowhere and zoom in on her face documentary/interview style. "What's Jeanne's take on all of this?"
>>
Rolled 58 (1d100)

>>4961748
...did anyone see Grandma-
Grandma puts an end to it by grounding Lolisniffer by throwing him into the Outer Realms
>>
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>>4961754
>>
Rolled 16 (1d100)

>>4961791
"HOW THE HELL ARE YOU-"
"You're grounded, young man."
"WHAT THE FUUUU-"
>>
Rolled 30 (1d100)

>>4961791
>>4961792
"AND NO XBOX FOR A WHOLE MONTH, THAT'LL TEACH YOU A LESSON"
>>
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>>4961794
"...how do you know what an Xbox is"
>>
Rolled 5 (1d100)

Quattro leads Marian, Luke, and Rasputin in front of Grandma.
Him and Marian have been knocked around and down so many times their recovery speed is legendary.
>>
Rolled 5 (1d100)

>>4961800
It's not the one you're thinking of. She said X's box. She still won't call your wife by her name.
>>
Rolled 96 (1d100)

>>4961800
"Blame your cousin. She told me everything about your work when I fought her."
>>
Rolled 63 (1d100)

>>4961800
Grandma is surprisingly tech adept for her age and has been browsing the internet for tips on how to punish rowdy children since she was released.
>>
>>4961801
>>4961803
This is some bullshit. Two fives in a row? TWO FIVES?
>>
>>4961801
>Quattro leads
The first mistake was assuming Quattro can lead anything beside in drunkeness
>>
>>4961807
Grandma likes him. It makes sense he goes in the front.
>>
>>4961808
So they're pushing him in, got it
>>
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>>4961804
"hrrrrmmmmmmm"
>>
Rolled 83 (1d100)

>>4961810
Now you're getting it.

>>4961811
For no reason at all, Grandma starts to reminiscence about Lolisniffer's father.
>>
Rolled 28 (1d100)

>>4961811
>>4961805
Also, that video of you bashing your sons' heads together was hilarious
"Betty..."
"Actually, that was Alt-Betty, she posted it in public, the bitch."
>>
Rolled 76 (1d100)

>>4961811
Dad rallies his family for a Family Fun Time Combo against Grandma by promising relatively light spankings to those responsible for the fuckups that's been going on if they beat Grandma together.
>>
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>>4961813
"Aaaaahhhh. You know, son. This is the most fun I had ever since I got out of that tomb you put me in. Getting man handled like that, almost reminds me of your father. Now that's a man who knows how to treat me right. MmmmmmM. He could give me the good hard boning that I crave everyni--"

"Yeah okay, maybe getting banished into another dimension isn't so bad, all things considered"
>>
Rolled 23 (1d100)

>>4961823
"Eww, gross Grandma."
>>
Rolled 41 (1d100)

>>4961823
"We'll, you asked nicely, so bye."
"AAAAAAAA-"
"Hoo...ray?"
>>
Rolled 44 (1d100)

>>4961823
AYYY LMAO!
That's some funny ass dialogue and reactions OP. Top notch.
Quattro leads Marian, Luke, and Rasputin in front of Grandma.
Him and Marian have been knocked around and down so many times their recovery speed is legendary.
>>4961801
>>
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>>4961832
Very rare time when both marian and quattro get to look cool
>>
Rolled 60 (1d100)

>>4961859
A true gamer RGB moment happens as their beautiful combo attack actually damages Grandma.
>>
Rolled 57 (1d100)

>>4961859
Coolness is dissipated almost immediately for the first 3 when they do stupid things.
Rasputin is irritated
>>
>>4961860
>RGB
Of course Quattro falls flat again
>>
Rolled 49 (1d100)

>>4961859
Grandma! We have something to show you!

They proceed to do the skeleton dance.
>>
>>4961865
Sorry Quattro, RGBY doesn't roll of the tounge as well as RGB does.
>>
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>>4961860
>>4961865
>>4961870
"C'mon guys! It would totally work! We don't have to pronounce RGBY is R-G-B-Y! We...we can pronounce it as..Rugby! Yeah! Like how RWBY is pronounced "Ruby!" or "Rewby", depending"

"What"
>>
Rolled 99 (1d100)

>>4961874
The brothers let Quattro have this one small thing, because they are nice and don't want to hurt his feelings too much. But they do call him a Discount Weeb for watching RWBY.
>>
Rolled 19 (1d100)

>>4961874
Quattro, did the head injury rattle your already non-existent brain, Marian hasn't even fully woken up yet and you're already thinking of making him fight grandma
>>
Rolled 84 (1d100)

The four of them use the secret bone shaping technique to guse into 1 giga skelington
>>
Rolled 29 (1d100)

>>4961874
It's a great show! The early seasons are phenomenal! You know, it's either this or the dance.
>>4961880
>>4961885
>>
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>>4961880
"It's like you're a watching a something made BY a weeb. You're like a bootleg weeb"

"Which is somehow below an actual weeb"

"SHUT UP, THE EARLY SEASONS WERE AMAZING"

"So which one's your waifu then, you discount weeb"

"NYEEEEEEEHHHHH"
>>
Rolled 99 (1d100)

>>4961897
"Thanks for the pick-me-up, boys."
>>
Rolled 62 (1d100)

>>4961897
>>4961901
"Damn it boys, you were supposed to destroy Grandma, not empower her!"
>>
Rolled 41 (1d100)

>4961897
Grandma starts laughing.
>>
>>4961932
Shit, hope this isn't against protocol, but I have to go.

"Hahahaha! Very good, very good! Now..." She forces them to sit down.
"WHAT DO MY GRANDDAUGTHERS HAVE TO SHOW ME?"
>>
Rolled 9 (1d100)

>>4961924
>>
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>>4961901
"Her energy drain is too strong!"

"This fucking family and its monster freaks of nature"

>>4961926
lol
>>
>>4961935
Did /qst/ lag again
>>
Rolled 32 (1d100)

>>4961935
Oh nevermind, captcha ate my post
Grandma banishes Lolisniffer to the shadow realm with her energy
>>
Rolled 85 (1d100)

>>4961935

Oh shit! A mysterious figure appear from the shadow who say, "I know how to defeat the grandma.."
>>
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>>4961941
Gasp! Who could this mysterious deus ex machina be?!
>>
Rolled 96 (1d100)

>>4961945
Zebra.
He immediately gets trashed.
>>
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>>4961946
Oh shit it's 3AM. OP Gotta sleep. Will continue tomorrow. Ish. Probably.

Or in 40 years. Who knows.

updates b here: https://twitter.com/notapaladin
>>
>>4961954
Thanks for the ride.
>>
>>4961954
Funny skeletons are always good shit, sleep well and don't destroy your liver. Or kidney, whichever one you used as an excuse before to not stay up all night on 4chan.
>>
>>4961966
Funny skeletons may be hazardous to your health
>>
>>4961874
>RWBY
what's your RWBY waifu OP
the later seasons were shit
>>
>>4962237
I consume RWBY purely through its porn. So I have no particularly strong feelings towards any or another
>>
>>4962894
So which character have you busted the most nuts too, then?
>>
>>4962897
I do not count my nuts, it is a fool's game
>>
>>4962900
so is watching RWBY's later seasons
>>
>>4961954
40 years later, OP still isn't back from the convience store
>>
>>4963624
OP will be back with a pack of cigs in about 12 hours

Or 12 years
>>
>>4965074
yes but what if
>>
>>4965074
not really
>>
OP got lost on the way home
>>
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>>4965820
>>
>>4965820
How'd you get lost for several hours while trying to get back to your basement to the kitchen? That takes some serious skills.
>>
>>4965830
The world is a cruel place
>>
Rolled 72 (1d100)

>>4965832
you're right because zebra exists
>>
Rolled 10 (1d100)

>>4965832
and you got lost again
>>
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>>4965915
>>
Rolled 25 (1d100)

>>4965921
Hmmmm what game should we play now
>>
Rolled 97 (1d100)

>>4965921
sure
go back to zebra interrupting the fight for no reason
>>
Rolled 56 (1d100)

>>4965921
OP was a skeleton all along.
>>
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>>4965923
>>
Rolled 78 (1d100)

>>4965926
Kick the can!
>>
Rolled 47 (1d100)

>>4965926
Weld the trash can shut and go back to things that matter instead.
>>
Rolled 98 (1d100)

>>4965926
Deny knowing him.
>>
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>>4965929
"C'mon Shotasniffer! Don't you recognize your dear ol uncle?!"
>>
Rolled 51 (1d100)

>>4965935
Lolisniffer just wants to banish himself now that his relation is known to his mom
>>
Rolled 41 (1d100)

>>4965935
>>4965927
>>
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>>4965936
"WAIT WAIT WA--"
>>
Rolled 80 (1d100)

>>4965941
"Just banish me now, mom"
>>
Rolled 77 (1d100)

>>4965941
What's Simon up too?
>>
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>>4965944
"Nah. You're in more pain this way"

"nyyeeeeh"
>>
Rolled 42 (1d100)

>>4965948
grandma decides to describe her entire plan
>>
Rolled 74 (1d100)

>>4965948
Lolisniffer launches Grandma to the far side of the moon to give his children time to plan their next move. Except for Marian, he fucked up already and his coming with him to hold down Grandma.
>>
Rolled 55 (1d100)

>>4965948
I dont know why but gran gran doing numbers to my dick. Like wow she got nice tits.
>>
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>>4965952
[loud yelling]
>>
Rolled 33 (1d100)

>>4965965
He also took Quattro for >>4961377
>>
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>>4965966
>>
Rolled 81 (1d100)

>>4965970
And Bobby gets whisked away because Bobby
>>
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>>4965972
There's something nagging at the back of your mind about Bobby, can't quite figure out what it is
>>
Rolled 94 (1d100)

>>4965979
That boy ain't right.
Well, everyone's looking to you now for the plan.
And I mean everyone.
>>
Rolled 72 (1d100)

>>4965979
It's time for the RTS Crossover as the USSR Mobile Construction Vehicle arrives with a batch of USSR reinforcements.
>>
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>>4965982
>>
Rolled 54 (1d100)

>>4965984
>>4965987
I will have my RTS segment, you will not deny me!
>>
Rolled 43 (1d100)

>>4965987
>>4965992
The RTS is made by Blizzard.
Modern Blizzard.
>>
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>>4965992
The Portal from Skeleton Island opens once again. From it rolls out a titanic vehicle, signalling its approaching with the fearsome call:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PRc2vx4xTVM
>>
Rolled 40 (1d100)

>>4966000
How much weaponry do we have to blast grandma
We need to find a way to shut off her energy drain
>>
Rolled 12 (1d100)

>>4966000
Conveniently, Jeanne has had time to analyze the workings of the portal gun Marian had developed and has been able to create a super weapon version of it that will totally be able to banish Grandma.

Mission Objective: Construct the not-Chronosphere and defend it until it is ready to banish Grandma.

RTS mode engage
>>
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>>4966002
Let's get a recap. We have access to Transforming tank/copter robots, Equality Prime V2, Gunbuster G V2, assorted USSR troops,...
>>
Rolled 99 (1d100)

>>4966008
Launch the copper bots so that we can fulfill the RTS portion
Let's hope Gunbuster G V2 has an auto mode where it basically just charges and fires
>>
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>>4966011
"Can't Ken pilot it?"
>>
Rolled 33 (1d100)

>>4966019
Do you want to risk being near the battle between dad and his mom
>>
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>>4966020
Ken is thinking

"You're supposed to say no, Ken"
>>
Rolled 60 (1d100)

>>4966031
"I can't, look at what he has on his hand."
"A Memoir of My Life, Part One, by Lolisniffer- oh"
>>
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>>4966034
"Don't mind me, I just picked up this book that Dad dropped. Continue your discussion"
>>
Rolled 42 (1d100)

>>4966036
Ken begrudingly decides not to pilot the Gunbuster on the condition that he be the Commander for the RTS section that is totally coming up and not getting cucked away from me by my god-awful dice rolls.
>>
Rolled 79 (1d100)

>>4966036
"But anyway, Ken should pilot, Luke will be his spotter, and both Chosen One and I will be their....watchers."
>>4966038
Well, duh
>>
>>4966038
>begrudingly decides not to pilot the Gunbuster
considering what he's facing if he doesn't pilot, he doesn't have a chance tp say no
>>
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>not getting cucked away from me by my god-awful dice rolls.

Dice God laughs for no particular reason
>>
Rolled 53 (1d100)

>>4966043
Jeanne has to take over as commander of the RTS, and Lilly as Mission Control instead since >>4966039
>>
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>>4966045
"Now go get Gunbuster G ready. We'll form up and join the battle soon enough"
>>
Rolled 31 (1d100)

>>4966052
Find Gunbuster G
>>
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>>4966053
>>
Rolled 53 (1d100)

>>4966059
go in reluctantly while rasputin and chosen one drag luke to the mech
>>
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>>4966061
"That cockpit's cramped as hell. Can't I go on my dragon instead? Olessa can come too"
>>
Rolled 91 (1d100)

>>4966065
Rasputin opens the book.
>>
Rolled 6 (1d100)

>>4966065
"The Bone Kingdom doesn't get the Dragon Rider unit until the Expansion Pack launches, now get in the fucking Mech"
>>
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>>4966066
Ah yes. Wisdom from dear ol' dad
>>
Rolled 69 (1d100)

>>4966070
"Here, Chose One, you need this more than me."
>>
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>>4966072
Mysterious Flask acquired
>>
Rolled 84 (1d100)

>>4966073
>>4966067
Time to go to RTS mode and observe the battle!
Send in the bots first of course
>>
Rolled 97 (1d100)

>>4966073
Now drink paint
>>
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>>4966075
ANd now....OP is being banished back into the wagecuck zone. Gotta job to do. Will continue this tomorrow.

And not head out for some smokes and never return. Promise.

Toodles
>>
>>4966078
But when is tomorrow
>>
Rolled 81 (1d100)

>>4966893
Yeah, yeah, yeah
I'll pay
When tomorrow
Tomorrow comes today
>>
>>4966078
where that OP at
>>
>>4967067
he disappeared into the shadow realm
>>
>>4966078
what did OP mean by thid
>>
Rolled 49 (1d100)

>>
Hey wait a second why do skeletons have boobs
>>
>>4966078
>>4968118
Asking the real questions here
>>
>>4968118
How else are going to sell Shotasniffer waifu pillows if she ain't got the tiddies?
>>
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>>4968118
>>4968263
Well, it's because I---
>>
Rolled 2 (1d100)

>>4968290
OP LOOK OUT IT'S THEM
>>
Rolled 82 (1d100)

>>4968290
From the RIGHT!?
>>
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>>4968311
>>
Rolled 72 (1d100)

>>4968318
OP GOT ISEKIA'D
>>
Rolled 38 (1d100)

>>4968318
Back to the sorta RTS where everyone is laughing at Bobby being eliminated
>>
>>4968319
Hey you, you’re finally awake.
>>
>>4968322
Do you mean me specifically or are you doing a goofy refrence
>>
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>>4968319
>>4968322
aw man
>>
Rolled 14 (1d100)

>>4968331
Choose your race op
>>
Rolled 70 (1d100)

>>4968331
Back to skeleton
>>
>>4968336
Ah fuck I was so close to choosing a new game for us but you seem to have bested me in rolls yet again HEMAN!
>>
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>>4968336
"Hey, anon. You're finally awake"
>>
Rolled 71 (1d100)

>>4968346
Choose to be Orc Skelly
>>
Rolled 62 (1d100)

>>4968346
Todd, no.
>>
Rolled 44 (1d100)

>>4968346
Uh oh
>>
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>>4968347
>>
Rolled 99 (1d100)

>>4968354
Now go fight his mom
>>
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>>4968357
Sadly Skele Orc was immediately shot by the Skeleton Police. Skeleton Systemic Racism is still a huge issue in the SkeleSociety
>>
Rolled 67 (1d100)

>>4968360
>>4968320
>>
Rolled 4 (1d100)

>>4968368
Don't worry, sub-par hero units like Bobby can be re-built at the Skeleton Barracks when we reach Tech Level 2 :^)
>>
>>4968360
Put him back together with duct tape
>>
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>>4968368
There's something off about Bobby
>>
Rolled 39 (1d100)

>>4968379
Yeah... it's as if he seems a bit ... brighter than ussual
>>
Rolled 54 (1d100)

>>4968379
Send skeleton attack dogs at Bobby to see if he's a spy.
>>
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>>4968384
ba dum tish
>>
Rolled 11 (1d100)

>>4968391
Punch Bobby as is customary for Shotasniffer
>>
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>>4968397
>>
Rolled 58 (1d100)

>>4968391
Punch self in face
>>
Rolled 73 (1d100)

>>4968400
>>4968401
Yeah, Dad's going to find out soon about your heroics
>>
Rolled 64 (1d100)

>>4968400
Back to the USSR Scout Helicopters as they observe the Battle against Grandma.
>>
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>>4968410
>>
Rolled 38 (1d100)

>>4968416
Now witness >>4968411 and laugh as Bobby fails to even be a fighter
>>
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>>4968421
He's doing great tho. As the ground they're fighting on.
>>
Rolled 19 (1d100)

>>4968438
Some one has to attack the ground being everywhere and all
>>
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>>4968442
>>
Rolled 1 (1d100)

>>4968444
Keep observing as we get ready Gunbuster G
>>
>>4968438
I thought boby got traded to some space aliens
>>
>>4968453
He came back, somehow, after a space adventure
>>4952907
It isn't important
>>
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>>4968452
>>4968452


>>4968453
>>4968462
Either that or he escaped and the aliens are coming back.

Who knows
>>
Rolled 12 (1d100)

>>4968467
They can have him honestly.
Go to Ken and Luke being completely unenthusiastic about riding a mech
>>
Rolled 32 (1d100)

>>4968467
Then everyone got tired of this game and said let's end it here and a new game was started.
>>
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>>4968469
"This cockpit smells like alcohol and broken dreams"
>>
Rolled 84 (1d100)

>>4968474
Let those broken dreams drive you to victory
>>
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>>4968476
The Mecha finishes booting. The onboard AI pipes up

"Welcome, Marian. Sexiest and coolest Skeleton who is definitely not an alcoholic loser nerd"


"...."
>>
Rolled 2 (1d100)

>>4968479
Input command "I'm a naughty Girl and need a Spanking"
>>
Rolled 20 (1d100)

>>4968479
>>4968481
Also "I like to watch little girl anime"
>>
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>>4968483
"Changing Greeting.....Welcome Marian, you naughty girl who needs a spanking. Watching one of those little girl animes gain?"
>>
Rolled 51 (1d100)

>>4968487
Change her desk top to a picture of a dragon dildo.
>>
>>4968489
>her
rip Marian
>>
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>>4968489
Sorry to cut this short, but I gotta go deal with some shit.

be back in 5 hours.

Or 5 years.

Depends
>>
Rolled 17 (1d100)

>>4968497
Having fun, Ken?
>>
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>>4968736
Anon get outta there, it's already cramped as it is
>>
Rolled 100 (1d100)

>>4968745
well better explain to rasputin why you're fooling around instead of approaching the fight
>>
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>>4968748
Talking is a free action
>>
Rolled 59 (1d100)

>>4968756
"That that means we have a lot of time reading our father's diar-"
"OK I'M GOING"
>>
File: 1.png (6 KB, 500x500)
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>>4968757
>>
Rolled 52 (1d100)

>>4968756
Penis dragons everywhere
>>
Rolled 49 (1d100)

>>4968763
>>4968764
we're not in marian's fantasy world guys
>>
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>>4968765
"Computer, delete all folders labeled "secret penis dragon fantasy literature", thank you"
>>
Rolled 53 (1d100)

>>4968770
now inspect the situation
>>
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>>4968774
>>
Rolled 62 (1d100)

>>4968777
>777
>Quattro down again
The audience laughs as camera is focused on Quattro while Betty and Alt-Betty commentate
>>
Rolled 48 (1d100)

>>4968777
The Chosen One airdrops the Mysterious Beverage he got from Raspuin to Quattro. Maybe it'll make him power up and turn him relevant again?
>>
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>>4968778
"once again Quattro eats massive shit"

"shameful"
>>
Rolled 3 (1d100)

>>4968780
>>4968782
>>
Rolled 43 (1d100)

>>4968782
>>4968784
air drop beverage and hope neither dad nor grandma gets it
>>
Rolled 98 (1d100)

>>4968782
Quattro actually is merely pretending
it's an after image
>>
>>4968787
in reality quattro is 50 meters away from the fight lying down
>>
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>>4968787
NANI
>>
Rolled 49 (1d100)

>>4968792
>>4968789
cut to 50 meters away
"man how far did she knock me back"
>>
Rolled 80 (1d100)

>>4968792
Quickly, follow after after images!
>>
File: 1.png (37 KB, 500x500)
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>>4968795
>>
Rolled 22 (1d100)

>>4968798
An entire line of Quattro lying on the ground
Man Grandma can kick hard
>>
Rolled 69 (1d100)

>>4968798
They go into local bar!
And then into game store!
And then into arcade!
And then back into the fight!
Then back into arcade with Grandma to settle it in Skeleton Fighter II Turbo!
>>
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>>4968801
"HAHA! GRANDMA! I CHALLENGE YOU TO SKELETON FIGHTER 2 TURBO! BEST OUT OF 5! WINNER TAKES ALL"
>>
Rolled 77 (1d100)

>>4968804
Grandma smashes him with the cabinet
>>
Rolled 79 (1d100)

>>4968804
It actually works
Unless Grandma is more of Skeleton Fighter Beta person
>>
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>>4968806
Unfortunately for Quattro. Grandma fucking bodied him
>>
Rolled 44 (1d100)

>>4968814
For that, Quattro has lost any respect he had left.
>>
Rolled 96 (1d100)

>>4968814
>autoloss without even rolls
He really lost his form

Quattro just goes into the sunset to be never seen again.
until next skeleton quest
>>
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>>4968816
As punishment, he must now play all video games with a Madcatz controller
>>
Rolled 89 (1d100)

>>4968821
I mean it can work for armored core games I guess
THE CLAW
>>
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>>4968823
"Quattro! Any thoughts on getting absolutely fucking bodied?"
>>
Rolled 87 (1d100)

>>4968827
some pithy comment on how it's not about winning, it's about having fun
>>
Rolled 21 (1d100)

>>4968827
Quattro says nothing as all his energy is absorbed by Grandma. He did say "Winner takes all".
>>
Rolled 29 (1d100)

>>4968827
Turns out low-kicks weren't the answer
>>
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>>4968828
"y-yeah well, uh. It's not about winning. It's, a-all about having fun. and that's what really important. ya know. the spirit of the, uh, fight. Yeah. So winning is not that important really. Just g-gotta have fun out there. You know"

"So did you have fun?"

"...."
>>
Rolled 45 (1d100)

>>4968834
The arm then clocks him with the microphone since it's grandma's arm
>>
Rolled 40 (1d100)

>>4968834
"..... a lil' bit"
>>
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>>4968835
>>
Rolled 30 (1d100)

>>4968840
man he sucks, how's marian
>>
Rolled 12 (1d100)

>>4968840
ask grandma how did she got so good at SFIITurbo
>>
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>>4968842
Lining up a shot
>>
Rolled 77 (1d100)

>>4968849
do it marian
>>
Rolled 73 (1d100)

>>4968849
>>4968851
just not hit dad
again
>>
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>>4968851
Can he do it?!
>>
Rolled 84 (1d100)

>>4968854
do it do it do it do it
>>
Rolled 41 (1d100)

>>4968854
roll for it
>>
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>>4968855
You fool! You've made Marian think about I Am... All of Me by Crush 40 (Main Theme of Shadow the Hedgehog) © SEGA, 2005! Now he can't focus as the edge is rattling his skull!
>>
Rolled 30 (1d100)

>>4968859
SHOOT ALREADY
>>
Rolled 89 (1d100)

>>4968859
welcome to the fantasy zone
get ready
>>
thanks for bread, I'm off for tonight
>>
File: 1.png (31 KB, 500x500)
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Rolled 2166 (1d3000)

>>4968862
Roll 2d1000

-666 Edgelord debuff
>>
Rolled 231 (1d1000)

>>4968868
blame the edge for missing your shot
>>
Rolled 26, 941 = 967 (2d1000)

>>4968868
It's good to see Marian still can't get fucking anything done right.
>>
Rolled 601, 103 = 704 (2d1000)

>>4968868
>>4968869
>>
File: 1.png (16 KB, 500x500)
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>>4968869
>>
Rolled 19 (1d100)

>>4968873
OH NO SHE SAW YOU
>>
Rolled 61 (1d100)

>>4968873
Marian dies because Grandma has no chill.
>>
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>>4968877
>>
Rolled 64 (1d100)

>>4968882
"So any more disappointments you want to throw at me, son?"
>>
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>>4968883
"And here I thought you liked Quattro"
>>
Rolled 15 (1d100)

>>4968890
"Just because he's funny doesn't mean he's not a disappointment."
>>
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>>4968893
"...fair"
>>
Rolled 33 (1d100)

>>4968896
Jeanne has used this time well and manged to construct a fully operational base, ready to produce weapons of war to stop Grandma.
>>
Rolled 28 (1d100)

>>4968896
"Now, after I drain you of your power, I'm going to throw you into the Outer Realms, then find that Zebra guy and have him join you, then destroy the world- what's that golem floating there?"
>>
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>>4968899
>>
Rolled 19 (1d100)

>>4968922
She's not happy that Rasputin's fangirl helped her with that
>>
>>4968922
Don't forget to set your rally points
>>
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>>4968926
"I am not happy that Rasputin's fangirl helped me with that. I coulda done it by myself"
>>
Rolled 78 (1d100)

>>4968936
"Your original plan involved a lot of anime things and a lovehotel for you and Ken" - Olessa
>>
>>4968940
I guess that's what happens when you stick all.your kids on an island and don't let them meet new people
>>
>>4968943
Simon Sez: Remember kids, socializing is important for a growing villain! Don't be like Lolisniffer and isolate your kids on an island , it makes them act weird!
>>
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>>4968940
"THE LOVE HOTEL IS ESPECIALLY IMPORTANT. SHUTUP. I don't see YOU coming up with a plan! I bet it's just gonna be a fishing trip for you and Luke anyway!"
>>
>>4968948
Oh come on, don't be silly, you can't fish on the moon.
Olessa wanted to build an aquarium and have Luke do all the work.
>>
Rolled 84 (1d100)

>>4968948
>>4968953
>>
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>>4968954
"Damn right I did"
>>
Rolled 54 (1d100)

>>4968958
Also bumper cars.
Anyway Mom got grounded.
>>
Rolled 7 (1d100)

>>4968958
1a2a3a your army at Grandma then keep rallying.

Maybe expand behind it
>>
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>>4968962
What a twist! Could Shadow Grandma making her move to get rid of both Lolisniffer and Grandma?! Whatever the case, we will continue....in like 10 hours! see ya

updates b here: https://twitter.com/notapaladin
>>
>>4968971
>Could Shadow Grandma making her move to get rid of both Lolisniffer and Grandma?!
You ask that like it wasn't intended from the beginning
>>
Hey guys person who asked why skeletons have boobs here. Just want to say that I wasn't actually against them. Also I'd fuck both shotasniffer and the grandma thank you.
>>
>>4969582
>>4968971
Who said you had to be against them to ask
>>
>>4968971
What is 10 hours to a man
>>
>>4968971
where you at OP
>>
>>4969663
What is ten hours to OP? What is ten hours to a thread? What us ten hours to a Skeleton?

OP clearly got lost on the way back from the kitchen again. Fatboy seems to be directionally challenged.
>>
internet gone to shit. will contoinue in like, 5 hours when it's more stable
>>
Rolled 80 (1d100)

>>4969831
hmmm
>>
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>>4970010
Hmmmm
>>
Rolled 23 (1d100)

>>4970021
Imagine having internet outages
>>
Rolled 27 (1d100)

>>4970021
OP's internet was interrupted by the fight between lolisniffer and his mom
>>
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>>4970023
>>
Rolled 44 (1d100)

>>4970024
meanwhile, mom got grounded and is sulking
>>
Rolled 29 (1d100)

>>4970024
>>4970025
With a really big bucket of ice cream
>>
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>>4970025
"She's not even my real mom!"

"but im your dad tho"

"Shut up dad"

"mmkay"
>>
Rolled 71 (1d100)

>>4970034
"The only reason he doesn't like the villains is because they own him money!"
"Greg, he literally just barged in and demanded 5 million per day, and then killed the first person who protested."
>>
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>>4970037
"Well then it's their fault for being in debt in the first place then"
>>
Rolled 31 (1d100)

>>4970043
They weren't even in debt, he just demanded payment.
>>
Rolled 74 (1d100)

>>4970043
Top down view of the massive army that Jeanne is about to Shift+A Click towards Grandma. Who needs to Micro when you have a Death Ball that you can just attack move against your enemy?
>>
>>4970049
>massive army
>against grandma
>with lolisniffer as a third party
this is why you suck at strategy, jeanne
>>
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>>4970049
>>
Rolled 80 (1d100)

>>4970061
Let me get this straight, you're going to send everyone to die to Grandma in the hope that she'll be too full from the energy she sucked from them.
>>
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>>4970062
"I mean. Aside from Equality Prime and Gunbuster G 2. Our army is remote controlled. Rasputin, Chosen One and Betty is commandeering one of the vehicles tho"
>>
Rolled 2 (1d100)

>>4970066
"I mean, it's not like Grandma has a way to destroy a lot of enemies at on-DID SHE JUST BLAST A FUCKING BEAM"
>>
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>>4970068
>>
Rolled 92 (1d100)

>>4970074
"Rasputin can I leave now"
"No, Betty."
>>
Rolled 38 (1d100)

>>4970074
It's a good thing the beam missed, time to hit Shift+X to spread out the units to limit AoE casualties
>>
Rolled 70 (1d100)

>>4970074
>>4970080
>>
File: 1.png (25 KB, 500x500)
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>>4970079
>>
Rolled 9 (1d100)

>>4970092
>>4970085
Wait why is it aimed upwards-LOOK OUT KEN
>>
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>>4970093
[WARNING. INCOMING BEAM]
>>
Rolled 76 (1d100)

>>4970101
RAISE SHIELDS RAISE RAISE RAISE
>>
Rolled 65 (1d100)

>>4970101
TAKE EVASIVE MANEUVERS
>>
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Rolled 271 (1d1000)

>>4970104
TOO LATE TO DODGE! BRACE YOURSELVES!

ROLL 2d1000
>>
Rolled 285, 271 = 556 (2d1000)

>>4970107
>>
>>4970110
I mean, I want to roll but what are the fucking odds for a 271 vs 271. That's just too coincidental for my taste.
>>
File: 1.png (22 KB, 500x500)
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>>4970110
>>
Rolled 36 (1d100)

>>4970118
YOU ARE JUST HOLDING, LAUNCH THE ATTACK
>>
File: 1.png (4 KB, 500x500)
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>>4970122
>>
Rolled 57 (1d100)

>>4970129
Unfortunately the epic battle scene turns out to be Grandma and Dad using the vehicles and troops as weapons for their fight.
>>
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>>4970132
For what it's worth. Dad only picks up the debris of your mechs after Grandma had blown them up
>>
Rolled 14 (1d100)

>>4970139
Rasputin is the only one admiring the fight, everyone else is trying to get out and run back to base.
>>
File: 1.png (15 KB, 500x500)
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>>4970145
>>
Rolled 98 (1d100)

>>4970155
Jeanne has observed the failures of the first wave and are making adjustments on the units to be produced for the second wave.
>>
Rolled 11 (1d100)

>>4970155
This is honestly just a game to both of them, except the prize is, "the Earth".
>>
File: 1.png (26 KB, 500x500)
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>>4970156
>>
Rolled 96 (1d100)

>>4970161
JEANNE LOOK OUT BEHIND YOU
>>
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>>4970163
But Jeanne's still all the way back at command base with Shotasniffer! WHo could it be?!
>>
Rolled 100 (1d100)

>>4970167
Shotasniffer herself, Jeanne's been wasting her resources and she just found out how much it cost.
>>
File: 1.png (12 KB, 500x500)
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>>4970168
>>
Rolled 80 (1d100)

>>4970179
WORK FASTER JEANNE
>>
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>>4970181
And work faster she did. After Shotasniffer did...things...to her
>>
Rolled 27 (1d100)

>>4970186
What kind of 'things' are we talking about?
>>
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Rolled 5 (1d100)

>>4970186
L-lewd!
>>
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>>4970188
Y'know.

""""Things"""""
.
>>
Rolled 20 (1d100)

>>4970193
That's not wholesome, OP
KEEP IT FAMILY FRIENDLY
>>
Rolled 33 (1d100)

>>4970193
The first R-rated RTS on the market.
>>
File: 1.png (6 KB, 500x500)
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>>4970197
>>
Rolled 6 (1d100)

>>4970198
Have Chosen One drink the flask from Dad.
>>
Rolled 97 (1d100)

>>4970200
>>4970198
Just a small sip, the whole thing is best saved for Quattro who is powered by alcoholism.
>>
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>>4970202
Getting some of that liquid courage
>>
Rolled 52 (1d100)

>>4970205
WITH SOME LIQUID COURAGE IN HIS BONES, CHOSEN ONE GOES IN TO HELP DAD!
>>
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>>4970208
"LOOK! BETTY! CHOSEN ONE IS GOING IN! TIME FOR US TO JOIN HIM TOO!"

"nyyyyeeeeehhhhhh i rather not tho. But if you i-insist"
>>
Rolled 79 (1d100)

>>4970216
AN ALL OUT ATTACK BY THE RED SQUAD!
URAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
>>
uh oh did OP pass out
>>
File: 1.png (22 KB, 500x500)
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>>4970218
>>
Rolled 13 (1d100)

>>4970239
CHOSEN ONE THEN THROWS THE FLASK TO QUATTRO FOR A MEGA POWER UP
>>
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>>4970242
WILL QUATTRO FINALLY BE ABLE TO BE COOL AGAIN?

FIND OUT IN ABOUT. I DUNNO. 10 HOURS. IF NOTHING FUCKS UP AGAIN. IF SOMETHING DO FUCK UP. WE'LL PROBABLY CONTINUE AT THE SAME TIME AS THIS SESSION
>>
>>4970248
damn, come back soon OP
>>
>>4970248
Quattro won't be cool again
>>
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>>4970748
lies and provocation
>>
Rolled 61 (1d100)

>>4970753
It's just Lilly stirring the pot, hoping Luke and Olessa do all the work for her.
>>
>>4970248
OP is clearly trying to avoid drawing Quattro as cool
>>
Rolled 38 (1d100)

>>4970753
Behold my massive roll that will prove Quattro will never ever be cool again
>>
Rolled 73 (1d100)

>>4970942
Your roll sucks. Now check out my fat roll that ensures Quattro gets a Redemption Arch!
>>
Rolled 26 (1d100)

>>4970952
>Redemption Arch
>Arch
so he gets an arch he can redeem for free booze?
>>
Rolled 63 (1d100)

>>4971041
No, he gets a Redemption Arc because I am posting from my Desktop now and will not be cucked by auto-correct this time.
>>
>>4970248
op has gone missing
>>
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>>4971076
>>
Rolled 53 (1d100)

>>4971078
!
>>
Rolled 9 (1d100)

>>4971078
Quattro finds OP so he can draw his Redemption Arc
>>
File: 1.png (6 KB, 500x500)
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>>4971080
>>
Rolled 9 (1d100)

>>4971083
Get back to the lewd RTS game Jeanne and Shotasniffer was playing.
>>
Rolled 32 (1d100)

>>4971083
>>4971081
And is now being chased by Lolisniffer and his mom for holding the eldritch drink of Von Jewburner
>>
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>>4971087
>the quatt
>redemption arc
>>
Rolled 52 (1d100)

>>4971090
I didn't say he got it.
>>4971085
THIS IS NO TIME FOR YOUR INCEST FANTASIES, KEN
>>
Rolled 32 (1d100)

>>4971090
You can't do my man Quattro like this, he deserves better.
>>
>>4971093
Evidently not. Alright then, carry on Quattro the Sideshow.
>>
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>>4971091
Well good. Can't have him take this
>>
Rolled 56 (1d100)

>>4971097
Back to Quattro suddenly realising Lolisniffer and Grandma are coming for him
>>
File: 1.png (4 KB, 500x500)
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>>4971099
>>
Rolled 89 (1d100)

>>4971102
OH GOD
>>
File: 1.png (14 KB, 500x500)
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>>4971103
>>
Rolled 16 (1d100)

>>4971112
back in base, our step-grandma calls for a retreat for all siblings to put her plan into action
>>
Rolled 58 (1d100)

>>4971112
DRINK THE FUCKING POTION, QUATTRO
>>
Rolled 85 (1d100)

>>4971112
Genuflect
>>
File: 1.png (9 KB, 500x500)
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>>4971116
>>
Rolled 32 (1d100)

>>4971127
ROLL FOR EFFECT
>>
Rolled 51 (1d100)

>>4971127
Shin Shouryuu Ken
>>
File: 1.png (24 KB, 500x500)
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>>4971131
Yeah jsut throw out a Raw Super
>>
Rolled 26 (1d100)

>>4971137
>>4971129
>>
Rolled 28 (1d100)

>>4971137
REMEMBER YOUR TRAINING
>>
Rolled 56 (1d100)

>>4971137
Punch her good home boy
>>
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Rolled 909 (1d1000)

>>4971139
ROLL 2d100 to see what Dad's drink empowered Quattro with til the end of this fight! First is for picking, second is result:

1-4: Quattro actually got too drunk and passes the fuck out
5-30: Quattro's bonus is now 250 plus whatever number I rolled
31-60: Quattro's dice is now a D2000
61-85: Quattro's combat roll no longer needs a 2dsomethingsomething for pickings. he picks the highest roll result
86-100: All the above except the first one
>>
Rolled 10, 48 = 58 (2d100)

>>4971148
Lets fucking go!
>>
Rolled 27, 54 = 81 (2d100)

>>4971148
>>
the irony is that 5-30 might actually be better
>>
File: 1.png (87 KB, 500x500)
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>>4971152
Exactly. Aint it a stinker
>>
>>4971152
Quattro is never lucky. Must be the yellow colour.
>>
Rolled 64 (1d100)

>>4971154
ok now you have temporary d2000
too bad grandma and dad have higher dice
and dad's angry with you for drinking his bottle
>>
File: 1.png (98 KB, 500x500)
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Rolled 2791 (1d3000)

>>4971156
Anyway roll 2d2000
>>
Rolled 358, 796 = 1154 (2d2000)

>>4971162
>Rolled 2791 (1d3000)
>>4971155
>autolose
NOT ONLY DID YOU MISS THE SHORYUKEN ON GRANDMA, YOU HIT DAD INSTEAD
>>
Rolled 68, 761 = 829 (2d2000)

>>4971162

Rollingu!!!
>>
File: 1.png (19 KB, 500x500)
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>>4971165
>>
Rolled 55 (1d100)

>>4971176
"THANKS FOR GIVING ME THE OPENING TO KNOCK HIM OUT AND BANISH HIM TO THE OUTER REALMS!"
>>
Rolled 43 (1d100)

>>4971176
There's a reason Quattro's Grandma's favorite. He's always making her laugh.
>>
Rolled 54 (1d100)

>>4971176
>>4971179
>>
>>4971179
>>4971181
in the hilarious way or the evil way
>>
>>4971182
Both.
>>
File: 1.png (12 KB, 500x500)
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>>4971178
>>4971179
>>4971181
"Ehehehe. Good job, kid. We sure make a great team"

Don't let your dad hear that
>>
Rolled 51 (1d100)

>>4971185
GET ANGRY QUATTRO, DO NOT LET GRANDMA GET TO YOUR HEAD


THIS WILL GIVE US A BUFF BIG ENOUGH TO TAKE OUT GRANDMA
>>
Rolled 61 (1d100)

>>4971185
Well, he did just get banished, now leaving Grandma free to wreck the world.
At least now big sis isn't in trouble.
>>
>>4971188
nigger are you really going with that
>>
Rolled 88 (1d100)

>>4971187
>>4971185
Gonna have to try and Veto terrible choices here
>>
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>>4971192
Wait a second.....Shadowboss!
>>
Rolled 94 (1d100)

>>4971194
>>4971187
Okay, now get angry Quattro.
This will be Quattro's redemption I can feel it.
>>
Rolled 62 (1d100)

>>4971194
CURSES, FOILED AGAIN
>>4971195
redemption from what, bobby
>>
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>>4971195
COULD THIS BE
>>
Rolled 30 (1d100)

>>4971205
ANGRY AND DRUNK
THE TWO STEPS TO MAKING QUATTRO EVEN MORE POWERFUL THAN GRANDMA?
>>
Rolled 76 (1d100)

>>4971205
"No."
>>
Rolled 74 (1d100)

>>4971213
Get out of here, you!
>>
Rolled 53 (1d100)

>>4971205
Anger will get nothing
find inner peace.
ascend to new level
>>
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>>4971213
>>
Rolled 98 (1d100)

>>4971223
arguments abound on whether knocking out dad was a "QUATTRO RISES AGAIN" moment (Rasputin) or "quattro chokes again" (Betty)
>>
Rolled 89 (1d100)

>>4971223
good thing that you are skeleton and can twist your neck in most unnatural angles to dodge
>>4971224
both
>>
>>4971223
Quattro really can't be redeemed, huh
>>
>>4971227
knocking out dad was good enough, at least now nobody has to worry about fighting dad if it came to that
>>
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>>4971224
"I mean, it gotta count for something right?"

"Fuck no it does"
>>
Rolled 98 (1d100)

>>4971239
Come on Quattro
Remember your training
>>
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>>4971242
FLAAASHBAAAACK

....oh damn he's too rattled to remember correctly
>>
Rolled 5 (1d100)

>>4971259
TRY HARDER QUATTRO
URAAAAAAAAAAAAH
THERE IS SOMETHING IN YOUR HEAD THAT YOU HAVE TO REMEMBER
>>
Rolled 24 (1d100)

>>4971259
Angry punch the gilf!
>>
Rolled 78 (1d100)

>>4971259
Time for grandma's customary final boss speech to everyone about her plan
>>
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>>4971263
"Ehehehe, you see, I---Lobsters are a family (Nephropidae, sometimes also Homeridae) of large marine crustaceans.

Lobsters have long bodies with muscular tails, and live in crevices or burrows on the sea floor. Three of their five pairs of legs have claws, including the first pair, which are usually much larger than the others. Highly prized as seafood, lobsters are economically important, and are often one of the most profitable commodities in coastal areas they populate."

Oh shit I dropped the remote, channel's been switch over to some nature documentary
>>
Rolled 51 (1d100)

>>4971273
Switch back and look at all the shocked faces
>>
Rolled 26 (1d100)

Back at HQ we have used all the maps resources to create a giga mass Accelerator cannon designed to fire 1 shotasniffer at extreamly high velocity at Grandma magnifying her punch a hundred fold
>>
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>>4971277
>>
Rolled 4 (1d100)

>>4971284
uh, are you ok, you seem to be shaking
>>
Rolled 94 (1d100)

>>4971284
Well Shotasniffer, it's up to us to finish the fight.
>>4971282
Can we do this plan?
>>
Rolled 99 (1d100)

>>4971282
Trying for this again
>>
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>>4971291
"It is the right thing to do. We are the only hope"

"Yeah but think about the cost tho"
>>
Rolled 60 (1d100)

>>4971299
"Think about the money we would earn by saving the world though."
"Think about Da-actually don't think about him at all"
>>
Rolled 58 (1d100)

>>4971299
Damn, splice in some of that demon costume design into the accelerator cannon suit
>>
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>>4971304
"Ah too late."

Giant Floating Dad Head appears and stares at you disapprovingly
>>
Rolled 66 (1d100)

>>4971308
FUCKING DO IT ALREADY
The time has come no matter the resources we spend, we have to stop Grandma.
>>
Rolled 20 (1d100)

>>4971305
>>4971310
"Stop her or else I will spank you."
>>
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>>4971310
Better get on it then
>>
Rolled 25 (1d100)

>>4971320
Lets coordinate with Jeanne to load ourselves into the ACCELERATOR CANNON
>>
Rolled 16 (1d100)

>>4971320
>>4971323
suffice to say she became extremely cooperative
>>
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>>4971323
DUN DUN
>>
Rolled 43 (1d100)

>>4971339
It's time to end this.
>>
Rolled 15 (1d100)

>>4971339
thats not to scale, the cannon is BIGGER then this and LONGER
>>
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>>4971341
"SHOTASNIFFER MOVING TO LOADING CHAMBER. ALL PERSONNEL READY FOR ACCELERATOR CANNON FIRING."
>>
Rolled 37 (1d100)

>>4971360
URAH URAH URAH
sorry got distracted
>>
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>>4971366
It's okay, Anon. I got distracted with. Things. Too
>>
Rolled 52 (1d100)

>>4971368
Whoa what the fuck
nice outfit.
>>
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>>4971369
Let's delete that timeline from our memory
>>
Rolled 68 (1d100)

>>4971377
[STAR WARS DEATH STAR SEQUENCE]
>>
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>>4971379
doo doo doo
>>
Rolled 74 (1d100)

>>4971388
and uhhh Jeanne as Princess Leia for some reason?
>>
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>>4971391
OP is immediately arrested by Disney Copyright Police
>>
Rolled 72 (1d100)

>>4971398
Anyways, let's get to the firing already.
>>
>>4971368
what the fuck is this skeletal anatomy, my fan theory is SHATTERED
>>
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>>4971400
And the firing will commence. In about 20 hours. Gotta go now. See ya

Updates be here: https://twitter.com/notapaladin

>>4971401
Gotta keep you on ya toes
>>
>>4971409
Where's Luke Skyweiner?
>>
>>4971409
Spook Wars Episode IV: A New Bone
>>
>>4971368
Clearly the next step for OP is to become a Twitter porn artist with a patreon
>>
>>4971902
Based and coom-pilled.
>>
Where that OP at?
>>
Rolled 60 (1d100)

>>4972263
>>4971409
somewhere within a hour
>>
>>4971409
This show now on Disney+
>>
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br3ad
>>
Rolled 1 (1d100)

>>4972349
Out some butter on that bread
>>
Rolled 17 (1d100)

>>4972349
Skeleton bread
>>
Rolled 71 (1d100)

>>4972349
*chomp*
>>
Rolled 18 (1d100)

>>4972349
Cut to Gunbuster G's inevitable destruction by Grandma
>>
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>>4972356
>>
Rolled 54 (1d100)

>>4972368
>>4972358
>>
Rolled 89 (1d100)

>>4972368
The bread has a mind of its own!
>>
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>>4972371
>>
Rolled 74 (1d100)

>>4972382
BLAM
>>
Rolled 11 (1d100)

>>4972382
Oh shit, you can have my wallet bread, please don't shoot me!
>>
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>>4972388
>>
Rolled 69 (1d100)

>>4972391
Continue Shotasniffer Launch Preperations
>>
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>>4972393
>>
Rolled 61 (1d100)

>>4972404
The other siblings are brought with you
>>
Rolled 67 (1d100)

>>4972404
>>4972406
Except Jeanne who remains to oversee production of units
>>
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>>4972406
Aside from Jeanne who's manning the controls, only Olessa and Lilly are left, really. The rest are already at the battle site
>>
Rolled 70 (1d100)

>>4972411
Helium mix: Optimal
Bearing: Set
Bombadiers: At their stations

Commence Shotasniffer Launch Event!
>>
Rolled 73 (1d100)

>>4972411
OPERATION "CRASH INTO GRANDMA" IS A GO
>>
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>>4972416
"We're ready, Jeanne"
>>
Rolled 23 (1d100)

>>4972429
Dramatically push the button.
>>
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>>4972431
>>
Rolled 86 (1d100)

>>4972438
Roll for result
>>
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>>4972439
Anon rolls around on the floor
>>
Rolled 75 (1d100)

>>4972443
He achieves no results
>>
Rolled 20 (1d100)

>>4972443
>>4972445
Sad
>>
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>>4972445
Anon contemplates the futility of life
>>
Rolled 37 (1d100)

>>4972453
Maybe I should buy that boat
>>
Rolled 41 (1d100)

>>4972453
Anon has the honor of becoming the cushion for Shotasniffer as she crashes into him after being launched.
>>
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>>4972454
>>
Rolled 57 (1d100)

>>4972459
Back to Shotasniffer, where did we end up?
>>
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Rolled 1486 (1d3000)

>>4972462
Roll 2d3000
>>
Rolled 2112, 894 = 3006 (2d3000)

>>4972473
>>
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>>4972478
Damn anon u suck
>>
Rolled 40 (1d100)

>>4972484
where was everyone else
so it wasn't quite there yet
>>
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>>4972490
In a sense
>>
>>4972500
Shockwaves from the punch blow everyone away except the two
>>
Rolled 78 (1d100)

>>4972500
>>4972502
>>
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>>4972505
Wow how convenieneeeeentttt
>>
Rolled 94 (1d100)

>>4972509
Well, except for Bobby
>>
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>>4972510
>>
Rolled 75 (1d100)

>>4972516
Quick, punch her in the face, that always works!
>>
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Rolled 860 (1d3000)

>>4972518
Roll 2d2200
>>
Rolled 1126, 711 = 1837 (2d2200)

>>4972523
>>
Rolled 1229, 837 = 2066 (2d2200)

>>4972525
>>4972523
stop rolling terrible
i'm here now
URAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
>>
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>>4972525
>>4972526
>>
Rolled 77 (1d100)

>>4972536
c;ear;y a mid-battle powerup is needed
>>
>>4972536
>>4972538
Like getting angry or all your siblings joining up with you.
>>
>>4972552
Or both.
>>
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>>4972538
Clearly anon needs to roll better
>>
Rolled 39 (1d100)

>>4972555
AH BUT WAIT FOR OLESSA'S TURN TO GO IN
WE STILL HAVE A CHANCE
>>
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>>4972560
OH SHIT
>>
Rolled 10 (1d100)

>>4972555
STRIKE
>>
Rolled 7 (1d100)

>>4972571
THE MIGHT OF THE BLUE TEAM!!!
URAAAAAAAH!
>>
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Rolled 721 (1d3000)

>>4972574
ROLL 2d2500
>>
Rolled 1786, 626 = 2412 (2d2500)

>>4972577
THIS IS FUCKING IT
URAAAAAAAAAH
>>
Rolled 970, 529 = 1499 (2d2500)

>>4972577
>>
does grandma literally have luck powers on her side
>>
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>>4972578
>>
Rolled 89 (1d100)

>>4972590
JEANNE LOAD LILLY IN WITH THE BIGGEST SWORD SHE CAN HANDLE
>>
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Rolled 436 (1d3000)

>>4972591
ROLL 2d2500
>>
Rolled 246, 1098 = 1344 (2d2500)

>>4972603
CRACK THE MOON IN FUCKING HALF
>>
Rolled 94, 497 = 591 (2d2500)

>>4972603
Behold
>>
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>>4972604
>>
Rolled 65 (1d100)

>>4972617
DIRECT HIT, DO A FOLLOW UP
>>
Rolled 6 (1d100)

>>4972617
>>4972618
DO THIS BUT WITH THE THREE SISTERS
SHOTASNIFFER, LILLY AND OLESSA
URAAAAAAAAAH
>>
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Rolled 2627 (1d3000)

>>4972618
Aight just roll 2d2500
>>
Rolled 57 (1d100)

>>4972622
AS I SAID, LUCK POWERS
>>
Rolled 1897, 1420 = 3317 (2d2500)

>>4972622
>>4972624
>>
Rolled 2246, 1822 = 4068 (2d2500)

>>4972622
bitch that's an autoloss
>>
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>>4972625
>>4972626
Aint that a hoot
>>
Rolled 65 (1d100)

>>4972634
We're gonna have to double team Grandma with Olessa and Shotasniffer then.
URAH!
>>
Rolled 9 (1d100)

>>4972634
>>4972637
Triple team you mean
>>
>>4972638
>>4972637
>>4972634
yeah uh triple team with Lilly
>>
Rolled 97 (1d100)

>>4972634
Everyone is pulled back to the cannon by a rubber dimondium string like a yoyo so they can be fired again. Shotasniffer grabs her dad on the way out.
>>
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Rolled 1374 (1d3000)

>>4972637
Roll 1d2700

Highest roll gets picked
>>
Rolled 1641 (1d2700)

>>4972659
URAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!
>>
Rolled 2211, 1483 = 3694 (2d2700)

>>4972660
>>
Rolled 1116 (1d2700)

>>4972659
>>
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>>4972660
QUICK! TAKE THIS TIME TO PICK ONE OF THESE ADVANTAGE:

A: More of your siblings make it back into the battle
B: OP goes to the nearby store for some groceries
C: Dad wakes up
D: OP gets all your money
>>
Rolled 91 (1d100)

>>4972669
C: DAD WAKES UP SO WE CAN FINALLY START THE FUCKING RITUAL
>>
Rolled 95 (1d100)

>>4972669
C, we need to distract grandmom so Dad can get in the cannon. His combo is infinite
>>
Rolled 97 (1d100)

>>4972669
>>4972671
>>4972674
I'M SURE THIS WILL GO WELL
>>
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>>4972677
"mmmm--WHUH?! WHERE AM I ?! JEANNE?! What's going on?! Last I remember Quattro socked me in the chin and then your grandma knocked me out. What happened?!"

"Oh uh hi dad. I got uh, the robots to drag you back to base and load you into an Accelerator Cannon so we can shoot you back at Grandma"

"Oh okay"
>>
Rolled 11 (1d100)

>>4972691
OKAY NOW THIS IS THE ONE TO KNOCK OUT GRANDMA SO WE CAN FINALLY START THE RITUAL
>>
Rolled 46 (1d100)

>>4972691
"So how's Shotasniffer. Has she been a good villain?"
"Uh, yes."
>>4972692
The ritual where we kill everyone?
>>
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>>4972694
"But uh, hypothetically. What if she was like, a superhero. Or something"

"Oh then I'll support her decision if that's the career she wants to take"

"....wait what"

"They'll never believe you if you tell them, Jeanne"
>>
Rolled 86 (1d100)

>>4972718
WELP
HIT THE BUTTON
>>
Rolled 31 (1d100)

>>4972718
>>4972723
That might be the most frightening thing Lolisniffer has said.
>>
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Rolled 198 (1d3000)

>>4972723
ROLL 2d4000
>>
Rolled 1812, 2407 = 4219 (2d4000)

>>4972729
>198
It's over.
>>
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>>4972731
>>
Rolled 96 (1d100)

>>4972748
GREG IT'S TIME FOR THE RITUAL!
>>
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>>4972752
"THE BLOOD RITUAL? But all the heroes and villains either retreated or all KO'd far away from here!"
>>
Rolled 91 (1d100)

>>4972766
JEANNE THANKFULLY HAS A PLAN TO BRING THE HEROES AND VILLAINS HERE IN ONE FELL SWOOP
>>
Rolled 74 (1d100)

>>4972768
You really want to risk that when both her mom and step-grandma disapprove of it?
>>
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>>4972768
"Of course. I could just get Jeanne to transport them here with the mechs..."

"Also your wife didn't want us doing the blood ritual"

"Ah shit. For real?......Maybe we can use animal blood then. You got the ponies?"
>>
Rolled 20 (1d100)

>>4972772
"Dad...Bobby here...you have know something about Shotasniffer..."
>>
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>>4972773
"...Bobby?! What are you down there?"
>>
Rolled 7 (1d100)

>>4972780
"Doesn't matter...you see...Shotasniffer...she"
"BOBBY, NO!" - all the other siblings
>>
Rolled 78 (1d100)

>>4972782
>>4972780
SHUSH Bobby
Get those mechs to transport the bodies
>>
Rolled 92 (1d100)

lets just fire grandmom into the sun with our cannon
>>
>>4972786
she'll probably come back on fire
>>
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>>4972785
"Ya sure? Your mom sounds pretty against it"
>>
>>4972789
I choose not to believe that grandmom is strong enough to survive the sun and escape its gravitational pull.
>>
Rolled 94 (1d100)

>>4972798
I'll do anything to have those ponies, Dad.
>>
Rolled 89 (1d100)

>>4972798
>>4972800
I will literally save every single pony and please ignore Bobby.
>>
>>4972800
>>4972798
siding with dad over mom. DADDY ISSUES
>>
>>4972804
dad's the henpecked "yes, dear" husband, though
>>
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>>4972800
Then what about...buying Skyrim
>>
Rolled 91 (1d100)

>>4972806
ANYTHING.
"SHOTASNIFFER BECAME A SUPERHEROINE, NYEEEEEEEEEEEH"
>>
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>>4972807
"...pardon?"
>>
Rolled 39 (1d100)

>>4972809
god damn it OP
just do the sacrificing of the heroes and villains already
>>
Rolled 29 (1d100)

>>4972809
greg brought all the ponies he has as bobby keeps repeating at the top of his voice
>>
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>>4972810
"Anyway, I called back to the youngun's base. They're bringing any KO'd combatant from the previous battle site to here"

"--huh? Oh oh right. yeah. yeah. Sorry, thought I heard something back there"
>>
Rolled 74 (1d100)

>>4972819
So, what exactly do we need to do for the sacrifice besides sacrifice, Dad? Any specific steps?
>>
Rolled 3 (1d100)

>>4972819
>>4972822
let's hope OP doesn't senak in a twist that ruins the entire ritual
>>
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>>4972822
"Well, first of all, we need a tomb or a coffin to put your grandma in. But since we're short on time, we'll just have to settle for a big hole inside the moon. Then we fill the hole with blood so that grandma is completely submerged. But save some blood tho, cuz after that we seal the opening by covering it with a lid, then cover said lid with runes. Written with the leftover blood."

"So we're sealing her in the Moon"

"It's not like we're gonna leave any life up here afterwards for her to drain for another escape"
>>
Rolled 63 (1d100)

>>4972843
Let's fucking do it.
>>
Rolled 50 (1d100)

>>4972843
This is going too well for comfort
>>
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>>4972846
And so they begin the dark work of murdering the unconscious heroes and villains and draining their blood

"L-Lolisniffer?! H-have you finally came to collect the money I owe?"

"Eh. Sorta"

"W-wait! I can pay! Just give me a fe---"
>>
Rolled 45 (1d100)

>>4972859
Walk away from it all, not knowing that Grandma is powering up
>>
Rolled 40 (1d100)

>>4972859
why kill them, we can just take mosto n of their blood
>>
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>>4972863
Well you just want a last minute twist huh anon
>>
Rolled 76 (1d100)

>>4972875
this is a superhero story, last minute twists are everywhere
>>4972872
>>
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>>4972879
Why settle for most of their blood when we can have all of their blood.

Plus it gets rid of competition
>>
Rolled 19 (1d100)

>>4972884
point, also bobby's still screaming something
>>
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>>4972885
"Hey! Someone go check on your brother! See what his deal is. Luke, Olessa, Lilly! Come down here and help me with this, since you have blades. The rest go check on your grandma"
>>
Rolled 79 (1d100)

LET'S GO CHECK ON GRANDMA
>>
Rolled 98 (1d100)

>>4972888
And so they did.
>>
>>4972884
mom will be mad
>>
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Rolled 89 (1d100)

>>4972891
Alright. Now for an uber important roll. This will determine if the ritual goes off without a hitch or not.

Roll 2d100
>>
Rolled 18, 7 = 25 (2d100)

>>4972900
>>
i knew something was up
>>
Rolled 57, 97 = 154 (2d100)

>>4972900
>>4972902
watch out niggers
>>
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>>4972909
Damn anon comes in clutch
>>
Rolled 91 (1d100)

>>4972914
LET'S GET GRANDMA SEALED UP AND END THIS QUEST ONCE AND FOR ALL
>>
File: 1.png (29 KB, 500x500)
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>>4972916
"Your mom is gonna nag my head off after this. But it's what we gotta do"
>>
Rolled 12 (1d100)

>>4972931
Anything for the pony.
>>
Rolled 19 (1d100)

>>4972931
The ritual should work, at least.
>>
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>>4972934
"Welp. It's finally over. To tell you the truth she knocked me around so much I kinda forgot how she got out in the first place. Oh well. Probably doesn't matter"
>>
Rolled 28 (1d100)

>>4972949
We're better off that way. AND FINALLY WE CAN CLOSE OUT THIS CHAPTER OF SKELETON ISLAND 2
>>
Rolled 24 (1d100)

>>4972949
Uh yeah, we better leave fast
>>4972956
Time for epilouges
>>
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>>4972956
So that means....Time for Skeleton Island Threeeeeeeeee
>>
Rolled 9 (1d100)

>>4972966
hey, let's do something new this time OP
put up the vote, do the epilogues yadayadayada
>>
Rolled 87 (1d100)

>>4972966
>>4972967
Epilogues first, don't tell dad anything
>>
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>>4972968
Dad's murder of the heroes and villains that joined the moon battle provided a boon: Less witnesses and people that can vouch for your heroism. Let's just hope he doesn't watch the news where you are venerated as the one who stopped the horrible life eating abomination that is your grandma.

And it really did provided less competition. You were able to increase the power of the United Shota Sniffing Republic relatively peacefully in the coming years. At least until the power vacuum does what a power vacuum does. But that's something to worry about later
>>
Rolled 14 (1d100)

>>4972982
>later
oh no
>>
>>4972982
It does help that we are celebrated everywhere we went
>>
Rolled 96 (1d100)

>>4972982
>>4972988
>>
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>>4972991
For being a daddy's girl and siding with his decision instead of mom's, Dad took you out for ice-cream and bought you a pony farm
>>
Rolled 1 (1d100)

>>4973009
FINALLY, nice.
We got the good ending.
>>
>>4973009
>>4973012
>good ending
Still a top hero though, so not necessarily the best
>>
Rolled 54 (1d100)

>>4973009
>>4973014
>>
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>>4973020
Let's consider it a moderate ending.

Anyway, Rasputin and Quattro's Dojo Business booms. It's one of the few places left that Quattro can act cool.
>>
Rolled 64 (1d100)

>>4973034
I really like this post card/photo album epilogue, OP
>>
>>4972982
>>4973009
>>4973034
theme song that plays over the ending montage https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6h8vCRwagO8
>>
Rolled 88 (1d100)

>>4973034
>>4973040
"Cool" being a relative term.
>>
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>>4973043
SPEAKING OF RELATIVES

Marian was eventually allowed back into the GSG offices. he was given a managerial job, having to work his way back up. Sometimes he would see Jeanne and Ken sneak off and do...things. Things that he doesn't wanna know.
>>
Rolled 22 (1d100)

>>4973049
That's gonna be a spicy subplot for a sequel.
>>
Rolled 88 (1d100)

>>4973049
Nope
>>
>>4973049
its for the best
>>
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>>4973053
Betty and Alt Betty would never truly get along. But they manage to work out an agreement.

Dunking on Quattro together.
>>
Rolled 85 (1d100)

>>4973069
Haha, poor Quattro.
>>
Rolled 26 (1d100)

>>4973069
Their show starts on Fridays at 8
>>
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>>4973072
Lilly continues her education without incident. As Luke insists on driving her to school every day so he can scare the kids.
>>
Rolled 80 (1d100)

>>4973080
badass biker brother
>>
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>>4973081
Rasputin's adopted demon son had a....troubling childhood.
>>
Rolled 6 (1d100)

>>4973090
Shotas got sniffed...
>>
Rolled 9 (1d100)

>>4973090
What about his fangirl
>>
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>>4973095
She enrolled into the Dojo in order to be closer to Rasputin. She pays Betty for photos of him
>>
Rolled 58 (1d100)

>>4973102
Speaking of money, the USSR's doing well due to merchandising deals and weapons research
>>
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>>4973107
ye ye. merchandises.....oh hey how did that get in there
>>
Rolled 97 (1d100)

>>4973111
you dropped this
>>
>>4973111
aaah, fan theory timeline corrected. I am at peace
>>
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>>4973116
And in the end. Things kinda worked out. Generally. Kinda. Probably.
>>
Rolled 31 (1d100)

>>4973136
Bobby, stuck in the moon: "NYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEH"
Jesus can't a skeleton sealed for the next few millennia get any sleep around here?"
>>
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>>4973144
But that's something that we can deal with later. In Skeleton island 3.

the end
>>
>>4973148
NYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEREEEEEEEEH
>>
Rolled 96 (1d100)

>>4973148
LET'S GOOOOOOOO
IT'S FINALLY OVER
>>
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Finally. OP can now die
>>
Rolled 58 (1d100)

>>4973169
Anything for suggestions
>>
>>4973169
Oh man, whatta ride, kudos OP
>>
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>>4973175
Currently we have on the card:

A. Knight Quest. Normal medieval adventure. Return to ye olden times

B. Mecha Arena. Multiplayer one. Everyone gets a mech and roll against eachother. Probable shitfest

C. Dudes n Xenos 3. It's like civ thing. But in space. Multiplayer. Definite shitfest.

Who got more ideas for the poll
>>
>>4973182
Captured Princess Quest, sequel to multiplayer adventure thing where all the PCs got slaughtered by skeletons
>>
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>>4973184
Yes. The captured princess. The princess who was captured. That captured princess that was never rescued. That princess. The princess that OP doesn't even remember what she looks like.
>>
>>4973182
Iunno, some quest about Quattro and his journey to find the golden drink
No it's not skeleton island quest 3
>>
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>>4973195
Nobody tell him about the grace period of no immediate sequels after an Adventure ends
>>
Rolled 68 (1d100)

>>4973182
>>4973202
C. DUDES N XENOS 3
MULTIPLAYER
when can we get started?
>>
>>4973204
When OP stops dying
>>
>>4973204
Wait for poll eager beaver
Also dude and xenos should be short rush to the finish
>>
>>4973211
>he doesn't like turtling
>>
>>4973182
>Knight Quest.
but its a serious quest from OP updated once a day with like a paragraph of writing
>>
>>4973217
Of all the things said over the years in these threads.

This one is the most unbelievable
>>
>>4973215
turtling is for people who like to wear women's clothing
rush or bust
that's how USSR won Skeleton Island
>>
>>4973221
No this is.
Fester is the best protagonist.
>>
>>4973225
"Damn. Anon's spittin' facts"
>>
>>4973202
It's not a sequel because it's not relevant to the main lore
Also because we deserve a comedy break
>>
I need the excitement of vampire hunter quest and the combat, it was fucking awesome
>>
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>>4973229
>>
>>4973231
But coop players like to drop dead though
>>
>>4973234
you clearly had an uninteresting character then
>>
>>4973234
Or murder eachother.

Or both
>>
>>4973232
MARIAN GET OUT YOUR QUEST ISN'T UNTIL 2023
>Captcha 40MAD
>>
>>4973237
I didn't even play, only rediscovered him from /v/ around end of skeleton island
>>
>>4973239
I propose any missing players will be played by other players until they come back
This will definitely not backfire
>>
>>4973246
Oh that already happened.

To varying degrees of...success
>>
>>4973247
The real best protagonist is Manlet Rider
"Sis you aren't even sure he's a young boy"
HE SHOULD BE
>>
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>>4973250
"Perhaps goblin porn are just for pedos who hasn't gone all the way yet" - Marian "Smartsy Fartsy" G Kujo Von Jewburner
>>
Rolled 53 (1d100)

>>4973255
Shut it Marian, we've seen what's on your mech
>>
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>>4973259
>>
>>4973255
>>4973259
I knew people who watch Goblin Slayer hentai had issues
>>
>>4973260
Also get out of the post-show commentary it's clearly Quattro time
>>
>>4973260
What are some other quests we can do in the skeletonverse?
>>
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>>4973266
[studio audience cheers]
>>
have you considered taking a break OP? maybe a day or two or a week then doing a vote after?
>>
>>4973269
Technically every quest is part of the skeletonverse
>>
>>4973269
Every quest we have so far is in the skeletonverse so technically any quest counts

>>4973271
Oh I always put up a poll right away but the actual start of the quest would vary. I can use the excuse of "oh im waiting for the votes to finalize" to slack off
>>
>>4973271
>not doing the vote THEN taking the break
>>
>>4973270
"NO IT'S MARIAN MOMENTS"
"NO IT'S QUIBBLES WITH THE QUART"
"NO IT'S-"
Q&M ADVENTURES COMING SOON
>>
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>>4973281
Sadly the pilot was cancelled before even airing
>>
>>4973283
Meanwhile the show "Shotasniffer Sitting On A Chair" is in its seventh season
>>
>>4973283
At least it wasn't Bobby Quest
>>
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>>4973284
Every single episode she would ask "You guys actually watch this stuff?" despite already knowing the answer
>>
>>4973295
To be fair, she had movie deals and a singing career going on, she's busy
>>
Oh hey, I slept thru the ending
anyway
Add Real Robot Pilot 2 to the poll you glorious round bastard and thanks for the bread
>>
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Remember the good ol days.

When Quattro was cool
>>
>>4973301
it was his cybernetics that made him lame
>>
>>4973303
when the hell did Quattro get cybernetics
>>
>>4973301
That was before player rolls turned Quattro and Marian into the walking jokes they are today and OP based their personalities on it for skeleton island 2/Shotasniffer quest
>>
>>4973301

I would watch skeleton island if it were an anime. No questions asked

>verification not required
>it's meant to be
>>
>>4973301
Should've brought rock culture analogue to that civ thing.
Lack of culture made people do unreasonable things.
>>
>>4973307
Maybe the real Quattro has been replaced by a cybernetic replica and that's why he can't be cool any longer.
>>
>>4973307
oops, thought you were talking about marian lmao
also both marian and quattro's players were bad
>>
>>4973307
In the lost episode where Shotasniffer surrendered everything to Marian after she got her spanking
It wasn't popular with focus groups
>>
>>4973311
Maybe the real Quattro was the friends we made along the way
>>
>>4973312
Quattro
>failed to capitalize on red's early wrecked status or hire an assistant until it was too late
Marian
Betrayed red for blue alliance and ended up causing red to start aggressively expanding too early
>>
>>4973318
no reason to be upset now
everyone's united
>>
>>4973319
Except Bobby
>>
>>4973311
That would ironically be cooler than what we have
So it can't be true
>>
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Anyway duderinos. That's it for me today. Used my dayoff to do this so imma slip into a coma until the next quest happens. See ya.

Poll be here: https://www.strawpoll.me/45609193

Updates be here: https://twitter.com/notapaladin

[insert credits theme here]
>>
Rolled 61 (1d100)

>>4973324
[Cheers theme plays as the camera zooms out]
>>
>>4973324
ayyyyy
thanks OP
looking forward to the next one
>>
>>4973324
>[insert credits theme here]
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7BfOjBpuGRI&ab_channel=Tomek
>>
>>4973324
it didnt count my vote for knight quest
>>
>>4973324
Didn't count my vote for multiplayer stuff huh
>>
>>4973324
OP you need to reset the strawpoll
>>
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>strawpoll only counts vote for real robutt

I think there's some shenanigans afoot
>>
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>>4973345
>>4973351

good
only robutts allowed
>>
Alright, Strawpoll.me seems to have fucked itself.

Guess we're moving to Strawpoll.com
>>
>>4973351
Real men use poal.me
>>
>>4973356
Sure why no. As long as it works
>>
>>4973354
>inb4 it was merely a start of robot take over
>>
>>4973358
MARIAN YOU LITTLE FUCK!
>>
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http://poal.me/2ovgy

Alright. Try if this works
>>
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>>4973359
It's seems you want to make a poll. Would you like some help?
>>
alright poll works now. OP can now go back to being in a coma. nighty night anons
>>
>>4973364
have some rest you glorious bastard
>>
>>4973363
YOU CAN'T BE HERE! YOU'RE DEAD! YOU'RE DEAAAAAAAAAAAA-
>>
>people want coop knight quest
so you guys want a clusterfuck
>>
>>4973369
when they didn't?
>>
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>>4973369
>>
>>4973370
>>4973373
I'm in
>>
>new dude vs xenos doesnt' have singleplayer campaign
games are just not the same anymore
>>
>>4973379
where's the resort management dlc
>>
>>4973388
Right next to the one DLC where Quattro hijacks the moon and crashes it into Skeleton Island for a salty runback
>>
>>4973392
That's Bobby you fool
>>
>>4973392
go to sleep, it's past noon
>>
Despite all our differences, we can all agree on one thing:
Bobby sucks.
>>
>>4973392
Thanks for the run. This was a great quest.
>>
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Thank you for your hard work op !!
>>
This quest was sponsored by Raid Shadow Legends
>>
>>4974193
Damn op I can’t believe you’re so broke after selling out.
>>
>>4974193
So when is Co-op Knight Quest
>>
wow nobody wants mecharena
super robot pilot 3 must be that bad
>>
final standings
Shotasniffer: famous heroine, shotacon, good singer and dancer, terrible cook, fears Dad
Rasputin: strength-obsessed, has no fear, had admireres and is caretaker of little boys
Chosen One: looks like Dad, sneak expert, drinks to remove his worries
Betty: loves fighting, has a rival, has permanent disdain for Quattro
Marian: crybaby weeaboo, may be secretly gay, only fan of Super Robot Pilot 3
Ken: drops spaghetti often, weak in melee, attracted to people who look like Jeanne
Jeanne: weeb, shills incest constantly, thinks people who look like her are rivals
Lilly: secretly learning about perversion, not scared of dad, loves big swords
Luke: animal tamer, vegan hater, obsessed with sausages
Olessa: loves crashing, is actually a shadowskeleton,treats Luke harshly
Quattro: drunkard, lost his cool months ago, unfunny comedian
Bobby: nobody cares
>>
>>4974930
Actually it's Quattro: Will have his day soon and will redeem self to become the coolest and strongest of all skellies.

This message is paid for by the Yellow Chillsaders Foundation
>>
>>4975452
quattro go home
>>
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>>4975462
No
>>
>>4975965
someday someone will be mad enough to suggest a quattro quest also starring marian
>>
>>4976048
I mean, a Quattro Marian quest where they have to overcome their uncoolness and save the rest of the siblings sounds pretty kino, not gonna lie. Whether or not it'll happen is another thing entierly.
>>
>>4976051
>and save the rest of the siblings
or they do something stupid that gets shotasniffer captured and now they have to save her or face the wrath of the other siblings
>>
>>4976065
Much more likely but would still be fun.

Also thanks for the quest OP.
>>
>Quattro and Marian will never get their own Monkey Island-style point and click adventure game
>>
I do support a Quattro and Marian quest in the future but we also need to redeem other characters in previous adventures.
>>
>>4976896
So Fester?
>>
>>4976914
Yes, Fester
Even... Zebra.
>>
>>4976920
>Fester
This is the point where you have to be stopped for your own good.
>Zebra
This is the point where should be erased from existence.
>>
>knight co-op quest confirmed unless some serious rigging done
thread when
>>
>>4977027
I liked Fester
>>
>coop knight being top
No wonder OP ran away
>>
It's time

>>4983711
>>4983711
>>4983711



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