You’re STANLEY PARBLE: a girl with a weird name and an even weirder tale: after a centuries-old lich woke up during your graveyard shift at the GOOD BOY DOGGIE BONE factory, your simple life of janitorial work became a bit more… Complicated.Sure, you became pals with your now-sentient skeleton (you named him LY) AND gained some nifty SUPER POWERS from eating MAGICAL BONE MARROW, but that doesn’t change the fact that your hometown of CLEARWATER, CALIFORNIA is overrun by HOMICIDAL SKELETONS! Even worse, the guy in charge is dead-set on taking over the rest of the world while he’s at it! Not cool!In stark contrast to your High School experience, you’ve become somewhat popular in this whole ‘SKELPOCALYPSE’ thing! Following a post-victory hootenanny that ended in an extremely awkward fashion, your day took a turn for the better when you reconnected not only with the marvelous merchant HAULIE PAULIE, but also with one of your first undead pals: STRIPES! Hyping you up for the greaser party you helped put together, the two of your reconnected a bit before you zipped off to THE LODGE–the local salt mine-turned-doomsday bunker run by your questionable employer, GOOD BOY DOGGIE BONES! Speaking of questionable employers, you finally managed to meet yours: the ever-eccentric and somewhat eerie SONNY BRUCKMANN JR! Over the course of a scrumptious lobster brunch cooked by a personal assistant you probably maimed in the past, your boss filled you in on the current issue surrounding the company: namely the unsettling prospect of a TRAITOR in your midst–one dead-set on ending this quest early…Your other meetings weren’t cheery either–a rendezvous behind the bunker’s local canteen revealed your company contact to be none other than CHRISTY– Security Chief Blumenkrantz’ personal assistant and the victim of a brutal attack during an all-too-familiar Christmas Party. Besides clearing the air between you two, she left you with a pledge to assist however possible along with an unsettling theory of there being more than one traitor! During a subsequent visit to your old friend DR. DEVON, you made a tough decision to not mass-produce a CURE-ALL SERUM synthesized from your aforementioned magical marrow. Whether or not that decision saves more lives than it ends remains to be seen, but at least you got a raccoon pet out of it!Having just returned to your private bunker with DENISE VENAAS, science dork and one-time crony of THE LICH in tow, your moment of relaxation was cut short by a confrontation instigated by TALBOT, her coworker and ex-science project. THIS is where your story continues...https://youtu.be/_wiwdlu-Zg0
>>5190116Welcome to BONES QUEST--zero calories, ALL FLAVOR! Make sure to check out the following resources:Archive Link to catch up with the story!>https://lws.thisisnotatrueending.com/qstarchive.html?tags=Bones%20QuestTwitter account for updates!>https://twitter.com/DemBonez3Imgur Page for quest and FAN ART! You make it, we display it!>https://imgur.com/a/dvF3SCNA HANDY PASTEBIN for INVENTORY, SKILLS, and MORE:>https://pastebin.com/u/DemBonez3/1/TvtRhtJKRolls are handled by a 1d100--I take the BEST OF THREE ROLLS! Certain boosts and maluses will be applied based on the situation and existing skills. Describing your actions, write-ins, FANART and GENERAL CREATIVITY are all APPRECIATED AND REWARDED--we like to keep things LIGHT and CHILL here, so come on in and have some fun!>CONTD.
>>5190122Just when you think things can’t get any more tense, someone forgets to pay the damn electricity bill! The modern, but cozy interior of your private bunker’s living room vanishes from sight as not just one, but every room in the joint goes dark! Tensing up at the sudden darkness, your gaze darts around your pitch-black surroundings while your pals spring into action!“What the FUCK!?” Talbot roars with disdain! “You better not have done some ‘science shit’ to the lights, dork!”“N-n-N-no! I’m sc-sc-scared of the d-dark!” Mutters the stuttering voice of Denise near the center of the room.“Nobody move!” Tucker barks as you hear Kiki fumbling through her pockets beside him, “It’s just an outage–it’ll be back in a second!”“Screw that-” Mitzi scoffs from across the circle from you, “Anyone got a lighter or something? Pretty sure I’ve got a flashlight somewhere…”“Yea, just gimme a sec…” Art grumbles a few feet from where you’re standing. “Stan, you got anything useful in those pockets you wanna share?”“Everyone just calm down!” Sybil orders, her position swiftly given away by a pair of glowing blue orbs. “... and will whoever’s grabbing me there please stop?”“... sorry.” Eddie mumbles in an embarrassed tone. Despite everyone’s solid suggestions, no one seems to actually do any of them. In fact, you can already feel your pals stumbling around blindly in the darkness! What the hell!?“I’d say I was shocked, but at dis’ point I’d be lyin’...” Ly remarks as he pokes the ASTRAL PROJECTION of his head out from your body. “Any ideas, cupcake?”Whether this is due to nerves, wicked intent, or their usual incompetence remains to be seen, but one thing’s for sure here:It’s up to YOU to clean up this mess!… also this damn RACCOON you’re holding is feisty! Protesting against you holding her by the scruff of her neck, LIL’ STANLEY jerks her surprisingly-heavy body around to escape your grasp, no doubt to steal a sip or ten of that DELICIOUS SOUP Kiki was cooking!Looks like it’s your move here–the question is, what do you do?!>TAKE CHARGE! ORDER EVERYONE TO COOL IT!>TACKLE SOMEONE! DON’T LET ‘EM OUT OF YOUR SIGHT! (WHO?)>JUST TAKE A FLASHLIGHT OUT ALREADY, CRIPES!>RESTRAIN THE RACCOON!>WRITE-IN!
>>5190125>JUST TAKE A FLASHLIGHT OUT ALREADY, CRIPES!>WRITE-IN!grab a can of infinameat to distract Stanley
>>5190125>>TAKE CHARGE! ORDER EVERYONE TO COOL IT!Also flashlight.
It looks like the flashlight's winning out here, but just to be sure I'll leave this decision open until WEDNESDAY 5-6PM PST! Sorry for the slow start--still feeling the effects of the move a bit and should be back up to speed in a day or so!Thanks for playing and hope to see you next time!
>>5190125>JUST TAKE A FLASHLIGHT OUT ALREADY, CRIPES!
>>5190229>>5190256>>5190792>>5190874THE TALLY:>FLASHLIGHT: 4!>INFINAMEAT FOR THE BEAST: 2!>TELL EVERYONE TO COOL IT: 1!You know what? I'm feelin' lucky here since we just kicked off a new thread. Let's do 'em ALL!Writing!
While your teammates fumble around the dark like a pack of blind people in a funhouse, you spring into action by chucking your pet into the darkness above you! Hissing with displeasure, LIL’ STANLEY’S impromptu flight leaves your hand open to retrieve both the TACTICAL FLASHLIGHT and CAN OF INFINAMEAT from your pockets! Whoops, that’s a ROCKET-PROPELLED GRENADE. Better put that back…With the correct tools in hand, you snarl a ‘COOL IT!’ that could stop a charging rhino into the inky blackness around you as you flick your flashlight on! Freezing with their weapons drawn in the beam of light like heavily-armed deer, your teammates watch with bewildered looks on their faces as you toss your light into your open mouth and use your free hand to cut open the meat can with your BONE CLAWS!As the woodland critter faceplants into the now-opened can of mystery meat with an unsettling ‘SPLUT’, you retract your claws and spit your flashlight back into your once again hand! Now then, you hiss, glaring daggers at Denise as you catch her trying to crawl away, is everyone gonna be cool, or do you have to bust some heads?! ART?!“I didn’t even DO anything…” The Rent-A-Cop whines as he slinks over to the relative safety of Sybil’s side with a sour look on his face.And what’s the deal with the GUNS anyways?You continue as your pet struggles to gorge herself and continue breathing. “I uh…” Eddie mutters, sheepishly stowing his REVOLVER into his pocket, “Er…”“Just a little jumpy, boss.” Mitzi cuts in, stowing her glowing SCIENCY GUN into her sidearm holster with an apologetic look on her face. “Never know what’s gonna sneak up on us, y’know?”“Yea,” snorts Talbot as he angrily crosses his arms, “like some kinda MAD SCIENCE RODEN-”Before he can finish his insult, you and the rest of the gang (save for Lil’ Stanley, her face still stuffed away in a can) recoil in pain as the lights turn on again with a bunker-shaking groan! Stumbling backwards, you land in a heap on the floor just as four chimes sputter through the Cold War-era intercom speakers placed haphazardly around your pad!>CONTD.
>>5191283https://youtu.be/zXhb596PlgI“-s thing on? Christ…” An unamused voice groans from beyond the speakers. “What Third World pawn shop did we steal THIS piece of crap from, huh?” The sound of ruffling papers cuts the announcer off. “Oh WOW, a SCRIPT. Yea, REAL fancy… Show me that gesture one more time and see what happens, Claude. Yea, that’s right. Ahem… Attention all personnel–The Lodge has suffered a minor brownout. Do not be alarmed or exit the shelter–maintenance teams have been dispatched to assess the problem. Thank you for your cooperation. This message was brought to you by Good Boy Doggie Bones: we-okay, do I REALLY have to say thi-”The question is interrupted by a brief scuffle. A few tense moments later, you hear the previous voice return to the intercom. “Alright, ALRIGHT! Okay, uh… ‘We were ‘BONE’ for this.’ Insensitive, mu-”His answer comes in the form of another scuffle followed by another series of chimes. “Guess dat’ answers dat’...” Ly remarks as the rest of the team’s vision recovers.“Well,” Sybil remarks, “At least it’s nothing serious.”“Yea right.” Talbot growls with a roll of his eyes. “These guys are the kings of pissing in your ear and telling you it’s raining. Case in POINT,” he continues, pointing an accusing finger at Denise’s prone form, “what the hell is SHE doing here?!”Stomping between the two and planting your feet firmly on the plush carpet, you give your fellow Evening Sanitation Coordinator a disapproving glare! You were getting to that, genius! You see-“HOLY CRAP!” He interjects, causing the others to stagger backwards in surprise! Whaaaaat, you groan! What’s his damn problem now!?“T-t-TWO STANS!” Talbot exclaims, jabbing a finger towards your new pet as she manages to wrench her meat-covered face free of the can! Ha ha, you growl as Lil’ Stanley gives the crowd a warning hiss, very funny!“W-wait…” Art mutters in a worried tone, “Wh-which one of them said that!?”“Cut it out, guys,” Eddie groans in disapproval, “You really shouldn’t keep one of those though, Stan–they’re VICIOUS.”Yea, you sigh as your new pet gnaws away at your forearm, you noticed!“They carry rabies too.” Tucker adds as he takes a few steps backwards. “And parasites.”“Nah…” Talbot scoffs as he strides over to give the raccoon a headpat,, “I ran into these lil’ squirts all the time in the vents at the lab–they’re kinda cute once they get used to ya!”“They never bit you?” Eddie asks, daring to take a few steps closer.“TONS of times!” Talbot shrugs with an unsettling eye twitch. “Never caught anything, though–guess I’m just tough!”You give the critter a glare as she allows Talbot to continue petting her. Laugh it up, fuzzball!>CONTD.
>>5191285Anyways, you continue, yanking your pet away from Talbot, you picked Denise up from Jail, okay? She didn’t escape or anything!“Okay,” Tucker nods as Kiki continues sharpening her knife, “But what was she doing, anyways? Why didn’t we see her come in?”“Yea!” Talbot adds angrily! “She’s got a lot to answer for, Stan! A LOT!”You KNOW, okay? But if you’re gonna do this, you’re doing it the SMART way! And that means YOUR WAY!Art opens his mouth to say something, but quickly reconsiders. Mitz is too spellbound by the woodland critter in your hands to say anything.“And erm… what might that be, Stan?” Sybil asks, clearly eager to avoid mob justice.Well, you begin,>FIRST THING’S FIRST: SOMEONE TELL ME WHAT JUST HAPPENED!>YOU GOTTA TALK TO TALBOT FIRST–IN PRIVATE!>DENISE, YOU WANNA EXPLAIN TO THE CROWD?>YOU’LL TELL THEM WHAT WAS GOING ON, OKAY? JUST CHILL!>WRITE-IN!
>>5191286>>YOU’LL TELL THEM WHAT WAS GOING ON, OKAY? JUST CHILL!
>>5191308>>5191314>TELL 'EM!Writing the last update of the evening!
Why, YOU’LL tell them what happened, duh! You are the protagonist, after all! “And you’ve got such a way wit’ words, too…” Ly remarks, prompting you to deliver a punch to your own gut. OW!Like you were saying, you wince, there’s a perfectly reasonable explanation for everything–no need to kill Denise… yet!“H-ha ha…” Responds the dweeb in question through forced laughter, “Y-you’re such a k-kidder, Stan…”Who’s kidding?! Seriously though, everyone had better take a seat–they might wanna grab a drink, too!“It’s not gonna take that long, is it?” Art asks as he and Syb sit down side by side on a nearby couch. “We still have stuff to do, right?”“Hmph! It can take forever for all I care!” Talbot grumbles as he slumps into a nearby loveseat! “As long as the Mad Scientist here gets what she deserves!”The Mad Scientist in question shoots you a pleading glance. You’re no expert, of course, but you’re pretty sure she doesn’t want people to know about how you asked her to whip up some LISTENING BUGS to eavesdrop on your pals with.… now that you think about it, you’re not sure if they should know either…“Can we at least put the wild animal away first?” Tucker asks, still wary of the rabid beast messily devouring the remaining mystery meat out of the can in your hand. “Where’d you even find that thing anyways?”Your ole’ pal DOCTOR DEVON, that’s who! She was a guinea… raccoon... for some experiments he was running!“Doctor, huh? What kind of experiments?” Eddie asks, eagerly leaning forward in his seat! “He’s a bit creepy at first, but really nice once you get to know him.” Art replies with an approving smile on his face! “Guy patched me up with some SERUM earlier… made from, uh, Stan’s favorite co-worker…”“Hey, yea!” Mitzi remarks with a snap of her fingers, “Did he ever finish those tests on your marrow? Is that what this is about?”Err, maybe, you shrug, denying her an answer. Besides, you segue, they wanted to know about Denise, right? You’ll start with that!“OR you can just tell us everything.” Art suggests. Damn it!How do you go about this anyways?>COME SORTA CLEAN! YOU WANTED DENISE TO MAKE YOU SOME LISTENING BUGS! FOR YOUR MISSION!>LIE! DENISE WAS GONNA MAKE EVERYONE AN ‘I’M SORRY’ PROJECT!>DEFLECT! WHY ARE THEY SO FREAKED OUT ANYWAYS? DENISE HAS BEEN A GOOD GUY FOR A WHILE NOW!>WRITE-IN!
That's it for tonight, all--had some plans this evening so updates were a little sparse. Should have more ready THURSDAY AROUND 4-5PM PST! Hope to see you then!
>>5191426Too tired. I'll think up a good excuse in the morning.
>>5191426>>DEFLECT! WHY ARE THEY SO FREAKED OUT ANYWAYS? DENISE HAS BEEN A GOOD GUY FOR A WHILE NOW!
>>5191426>LIE! DENISE WAS GONNA MAKE EVERYONE AN ‘I’M SORRY’ PROJECT!
Gonna keep this open a little longer before rolling a tiebreaker. Seeya in a jiff!
>>5191426>>LIE! DENISE WAS GONNA MAKE EVERYONE AN ‘I’M SORRY’ PROJECT!
>>5191452>DEFLECT!>>5191454>>5191897>>5191898>LIE!The truth LIES within! ROLL ME 1d100+10 (BUNNY AND CINNAMON BONEUS) TO LIE YOUR BUTT OFF--'BONE'USES AWARDED TO WRITE-INS! I'LL TAKE THE BEST OF 3 ROLLS!
Rolled 66 (1d100)>>5191920
Rolled 83 + 10 (1d100 + 10)>>5191920
Rolled 15 + 10 (1d100 + 10)>>5191920
>>5191933>>5191937>>5191938>HIGHEST ROLL: 93!!!That'll do'er! Writing!
With an exaggerated eye roll, of course! Taking a few steps back so that everyone can get a look, you pair the gesture with the most irritated groan you can muster under pressure as you reluctantly hold out your free hand towards the sweat-soaked scientist on the ground.Y’know, you growl as Denise’s clammy hand clasps yours, you guys can be real BONEHEADS, you know that?“Uh, too soon?” Art interjects, backing off when you shoot him a disapproving glare. He doesn’t even know what’s happening here, does he?“What’s happening,” Talbot snarls with a menacing crack of his knuckles, “is Nerdy Nelly here’s about to answer for everything she’s done to me!” Jeez louise, is he still pissed off about becoming an INDESTRUCTIBLE MURDER MACHINE? For FREE?“Y-yea, well…” He stammers, clearly taken off-guard, “I uh… I mean when you put it like that…”Look, you continue as you help the dork in question to her shaky feet, you get it, okay? She pissed him off and he wants justice–no one understands that better than you!“Yea, but-”But NOTHING, you snap! You know who ELSE gets it? THIS dweeb! Jabbing your raccoon-toting hand in Denise’s direction, the scientist recoils in fear as LIL’ STANLEY hisses at her between licking the mystery meat can clean! “Still doesn’t explain why she was creepin’ around like a goblin, though, does it?” Mitzi asks, crossing her arms at Talbot’s side. “AND gathering stuff!” Eddie adds with an energetic nod! “What’s she planning, anyways? She just made weird noises when we asked!”FINE, you groan, they really wanna know what’s going on here? REALLY?“I mean… it’d be nice...” Art shrugs.“I honestly just wanna give her a swirlie, but sure.” Talbot grunts.“I just came to see what the ruckus was about.” Mitzi adds as she squeezes some water from her still-damp hair. “I blame peer pressure, mostly.”Okay, you sigh, giving Denise a faux-resigned look. If she catches on, she sure as hell doesn’t show it. The truth is, you continue as she takes cover behind you, Denise was working on something. Something that no one was supposed to find out about.“S-Stan… P-PPlease…” The geek whimpers as her sweaty hands clasp around your ankle.“W-working on something?” Tucker asks as the rest of the group listens with interest, “Wh-what?”Adding one last sigh for good measure, you give them all a defeated nod before opening your mouth.“Stan,” Ly hisses, “Don’t-”>CONTD.
>>5192022She was working on an APOLOGY GIFT, okay?! And now you nosy jerks SPOILED it! Your sudden outburst coats the bunker in an eerie silence as realization dawns on your cremember’s faces!“A-an apology?” Talbot mutters, eyes wide in disbelief, “F-for US?”You respond with a series of disapproving tongue clicks. That’s right, you sigh, but now it’s all ruined. Nice going, TalBUTT.The janitor opens his mouth to respond, but it’s too late–the seed of deception’s been planted! “S-so uh… W-what was the gif-”“Are you serious, man!?” Eddie shouts, sending the tracksuited terror stumbling backwards! “You spoil the gift AND you wanna know what it is?”“Gotta say, man,” Tucker adds with a frown, “that’s kinda low.”“Kinda sad, really.” Mitzi nods, causing the color to drain from Talbot’s face. As the primary instigator tries and fails to form an appropriate response, you give Denise a sympathetic pat on the back. Guess it’s back to the dawning board, huh?“E-er, th-the dr-drawing board? N-never mind…” She squeaks as she finally realizes what’s happening. “Y-yea! Y-you guys w-w-went and sp-spoiled the s-surprise! D-darn it!”Throwing in a dejected snap of her fingers for good measure, the scientist turns your way to give you a surreptitious wink! Ew! Shaking off the resulting chills, you take the opportunity to take LIL’ STANLEY by the scruff of her neck and place her scrambling form back onto your shoulder! Seems like everyone here’s got some growing up to do! A LOT!“I uh…” Talbots mumbles as the others, sans Sybil, awkwardly twiddle their thumbs and clear their throats, “I’m er… M-my bad, guys…”“W-well,” Denise interrupts as she confidently adjusts her wide-rimmed glasses, “I c-can st-still whip s-something up… b-but y-you all need to b-BEHAVE!” She adds, jabbing a disapproving finger around the circle, “N-no peeking!”A chorus of variations on the word ‘okay’ ring out from your teammates as a smug grin forms on your face. Yes, you think to yourself, that’ll do just nicely! “Pretty smooth, cupcake.” Ly remarks with pride in his disembodied voice. “Nearly got me believin’ it too!”>CONTD.
>>5192023As the gang looks for any excuse to, well, be excused, you notice a slight miscount in your usual ranks–Gus, you mutter with a raise of your eyebrow, he ain’t back yet?“Nope…” Tucker replies, sharing a similar look with Kiki. “How far’s that PIZZA PLACE of his, anyways?”Not far, you shrug as memories of oozing cheese, plush red booths, and excited chatter from the kitchen crowd your head. Even with the SKELETONS around, PIZZA CAKE is only a short drive from your apartment!“We worried about the big guy?” Mitzi asks as she crosses her arms. “He does have a habit of showing up outta’ nowhere…”Yea, you nod, he’s probably heading down right now with an extra-large meat lover’s and a liter of MR. PAPRIKA. He’ll be fine!“In that case,” Sybil interjects, running a pale hand through her purple-highlighted hair, “Shall we make travel preparations? There’s only one more LIEUTENANT left, after all.”“Yea,” Art nods, “and they’re underwater. Not exactly a walk down the block.”Before you can respond, Kiki jabs the knife in her hand towards the kitchen with an irritated expression barely hidden behind her bangs! Right, you exclaim, the SOUP!“Should be done soon.” Tucker explains with an apologetic look on his face. “But if we’ve gotta hit the road, then-”The road will be there after soup, okay!? Besides, you continue, you just got back–you still have crap to take care of!“Works for me!” Mitzi croons as a grateful grin appears on her face! “Gotta finish dryin’ off anyways!”“Still don’t know how you won that breath-holding contest…” Eddie groans, sinking deeper into his seat. So that’s what was going on, huh?As the rest of your team disperses into various rooms, you find yourself contemplating your next actions. After a few minutes of standing awkwardly in the living room like a total stooge, you ultimately decide to:>GRAB TALBOT! HE NEEDS TO FESS UP ABOUT HIS MEMORIES ALREADY!>HAND OFF THAT SERUM TO SOMEONE–MAYBE (WHO?) COULD USE IT?>CHECK IN WITH DENISE–THAT WAS A CLOSE CALL!>GATHER THE TEAM TO DISCUSS YOUR NEXT DESTINATION!>WRITE-IN!
>>5192025>>HAND OFF THAT SERUM TO SOMEONE–MAYBE (WHO?) COULD USE IT?>ART!Mr. "Let me use Boris the Bastards precious bone serum", Well if he wants Serum he can GET SOME!
Gonna leave this open until FRIDAY 4-5PM PST, big day today! Thanks for playing and hope to see you for the next one--feels good to be back even if I'm still a little rusty!
>>5192048>>5192038Is that a good idea? I mean, I'm already wary of the fact that Little Stan has that shit in her. Who knows what the implications are. That serum would probably be safest hanging out wherever its least likely to be taken by anyone. In other words, in our pockets.
>>5192025>GRAB TALBOT! HE NEEDS TO FESS UP ABOUT HIS MEMORIES ALREADY!
>>5192025>>5192048Yeah switching vote now that I think about it. I wanna hear Talbot’s tragic backstory.
>>5192025>GRAB TALBOT! HE NEEDS TO FESS UP ABOUT HIS MEMORIES ALREADY!We've been waiting two threads to hear this.
>>5192038>IMPROVE YOUR ART!>>5192117>>5192124>>5192552>>5192654>TALBOT TIME!Writing!
A sudden realization hits you like a foam bat to the face–Talbot, you hiss, he never fessed up about his memories!“Say what ya’ will about da’ guy,” Ly remarks as you stomp off in the direction you last saw him head, “he’s pretty slippery when he wants ta’ be.”Not slippery enough, you reply as you emerge into your bunker’s POOL AREA for the first time! Though not nearly as impressive as your boss’ garden, the pool’s clearly a step up from the one you had growing up! Black tiles surround a stout layer of river rocks bordering the water–the latter sitting with barely a ripple on top of even smaller blue tiles interlaced with glimmering seashells.From a slit in the ceiling spanning the width of the deep end comes a waterfall–its flow creating a paper-thin curtain of water that descends to a cluster of sitting stones below. Peering past the cascade, you can just barely see what appears to be a hot tub sunken into the floor for a more natural appearance… save for the eerie green light shining from the bottom.You’re just about to dive in when you spot a familiar crowd idling next to what you assume are doors to dressing rooms adjacent to the waterfall–specifically Syb, Mitz, Eddie, Art, and your target:TALBOT!All of which are still wearing their usual attire.“Pop the cover off right now and I’ll prove it.” The man in question says with determination. “I don’t even need to put swim trunks on.”“I can tell you with absolute certainty that even if you were correct,” Sybil replies, clearly eager to abandon the conversation, “You stand to gain nothing from stuffing yourself into this ‘secret passage’ of yours.”“Uhh, apart from looking awesome when I pop out from the top of the waterfall?” Talbot fires back in an incredulous tone. “Artie, back me up here!”“Even though I agree that it’s a stupid idea,” Art begins, exchanging a knowing glance with Mitzi, “I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want to see him try it.”“Shit, I’ll give you five bucks.” Mitz adds, gesturing to the pool filter cover despite Sybil’s look of disapproval. “I’ll even pop the thing open myself.”“Oh good, Stan’s here!” Exclaims The Goth in mock surprise as you approach the group! “Perhaps you’ll listen to her?”“Whuh?” Talbot asks as you reach the circle. “Oh. Hey.”Hey himself! “Don’t tell me you don’t wanna check out this secret tunnel!” He continues, gesturing towards the waterfall’s origin. “Think of how cool it’d be!”The only thing you’re thinking of, you snap, is that you’ve got a bone to pick with him! Or did he forget you were gonna talk? Sensing drama, the rest of the pool goers chime in with an ‘ooooh’!“Sure,” He nods, waving you and LIL’ STANLEY away, “Just uh, just wait a sec, alright?”For what, pray tell?>CONTD.
>>5192841Talbot’s gaze shifts from you to the two other ladies. “Well-”“If Stan needs to talk to you, you’d better go now, dude.” Mitzi interrupts as she crosses her arms. “Come on,” he shrugs, “Stan can wait until-”“We’re not changing until you go.” Syb says in a stern voice.“B-but what’s the point then-”Before he can finish, you wrap your arm around his and yank the janitor towards the door you entered from! No buts, you snarl as LIL’ STANLEY bites him for good measure, he’s not getting out of it this time!“N-NOOOO!” He howls, fruitlessly clawing at the pool goers! “NOOOOOOOOOO!”“Have fun, you two.” Art chuckles as the remaining three watch with smug grins. Kicking and screaming all the way to the master bedroom, Talbot only relaxes when you release your hold on him to close the door behind you!“Seriously?” He grumbles as he takes a seat on the bed, “you couldn’t wait a little longer to whisk me away to the bedroom?”No, you reply with a furrowed brow, you couldn’t! He’s been dodging you for long enough!“Ugh,” he groans, begrudgingly reaching for his belt, “just put the friggin’ trash panda away first, will ya?”You feel your cheeks go red hot as you chuck a pillow at your coworker! C-cut it out, idiot! You didn’t drag him in here for THAT!!“Wait, really?” He asks with a hint of disappointment in his voice, “then why did you?”Is he dumb or what? Tossing another pillow at his face, you give Talbot a gentle reminder: he was gonna tell you about his memories, remember?!The Evening Sanitation Coordinator looks at you as if you just grew elephant ears. “... wha?”This sonnovabitch… rolling up your jumpsuit sleeves even further, you hiss out a more pointed explanation: the shooting contest at the saloon, you goof! You won it–he promised to spill the beans on what he remembers!“Remembers?” He repeats with visible confusion on his face, “What, like from before?”YES, you howl, sending LIL’ STANLEY leaping from your shoulder and skittering into the bathroom! And he’d better not even think of lying, or you’ll clock him! Shrinking away from your fist, Talbot’s face lights up in sudden realization! “Oh SHIT, you’re right! I totally forgot!” He gushes in a tone that nearly sounds apologetic! “Man, I’ve been tripping lately, huh?”He can say that again! Now focus, you growl, impatience growing in your voice, because you’ve got a few questions for him!“... like what?”Well, you reply, voice trailing off in thought, you uh… hold on a sec…>WHAT’S HIS DEAL, ANYWAYS? WHY IS HE SUCH A JERK ALL THE TIME?>WHAT DOES HE REMEMBER FROM BEFORE HE BECAME A MURDER SKELETON?>WHAT CAN HE TELL YOU ABOUT WORKING FOR TIM?>HE REALLY HATES DENISE, DOESN’T HE?>WRITE-IN!
>>5192843>WHAT CAN HE TELL YOU ABOUT WORKING FOR TIM?>HE REALLY HATES DENISE, DOESN’T HE?
>>5192843>>WHAT DOES HE REMEMBER FROM BEFORE HE BECAME A MURDER SKELETON?>>WHAT CAN HE TELL YOU ABOUT WORKING FOR TIM?>captcha : mwstd
>>5192960>>5192965THE TALLY:>WORKING FOR TIM: 2>HATE DENISE: 1>THE BEFORETIMES: 1Writing!
You know, it wasn’t too long ago that this guy was twelve feet tall, decked out in a menacing trench coat, and hunting you down like a jumped-up foxhound. Making yourself comfy by leaning on the wall, you start by asking Talbot what it was like working for TIM!“I uh… I don’t remember much about that.” He mutters, awkwardly running his fingers through his red hair.Bullshit.“Okay yea, ya got me.” He quickly replies with a defeated sigh! “I think I ran into the guy a little after I uh… I woke up again.”THAT gets your attention! He met TIM?! The janitor’s face scrunches up in annoyance. “Kinda? He wasn’t, like, there when those science dorks activated me or whatever, but I could hear him, y’know? Like he stuffed a speaker into my brain or something.”“Sounds like da’ treatment Cliff an’ da’ others got…” Ly remarks, causing you to frown. So he could talk to him?“Well I couldn’t talk to him,” Talbot says as he furrows his brow. “Otherwise I woulda’ told him where to shove it, y’know? But at the same time I… I just couldn’t.”The idea of Talbot having trouble being a dick makes you giggle a bit–really?!“Yea, really!” Talbot growls! “It was like those options were missing or something–like I couldn’t choose ‘em!”You nod in understanding–you know what it means to be railroaded, that’s for damn sure. So he couldn’t tell him off… what could Talbot do?“They gave me these commands…” explains the janitor as he drums his fingers on your bed. “Like I’d be walking around, right? Then out of nowhere I would just get this buzzing in my head to, I dunno, go to LAB A or something. Part of it was kinda cool because I’d always know the best route, but-”Hold on, you interrupt, how?“I just DID, gosh!” Talbot groans as if you asked him what color an orange is! “It’s like when you’re on your computer, right? Other people might not know where you keep, like, pictures or whatever, but you do because you’ve memorized the folder!”You can’t help but raise an eyebrow at that. What uh, what pictures is he-“Doesn’t matter. Point is, if I was commanded to go somewhere or do something, it’d just… direct me.” He explains. “We done?”Not yet, you snap! What if he just ignored the commands? He coulda’ saved you a lot of headaches! His face scrunches up even more at your question.“Aw man, that was the worst! Okay, so the commands would keep piling up, right? Like, I dunno, sidequests in a video game when they take up all of your screen space.”Yea, you nod, you think you get that…>CONTD.
>>5193276“But that’s not even the worst part!” He spits as if reliving it again! “The longer they sat there, the more you’d feel this… this BUZZING. Like your head was turning into a tuning fork or something!”“He’s really nailin’ da’ metaphors today, huh?” Ly asks in a bemused tone. SHH!“So you had to do ‘em.” He concludes with a shrug. Or else what?“Or else it’d get LOUDER!” He growls! “And, I dunno, maybe my head would blow up or something! Not like I could really try anything anyways–my whole body was, like, tuned into that crap, alright?”You thoughtfully rub your chin as you stare at Talbot for a moment. So if what he’s saying is true, you muse aloud to yourself, then all of those attempts to kill you were-“Not my fault, yea!” He interjects, clearly eager to move on. “There ya’ go–questions answered!”So when he tracked you down, you continue, brushing off his prior statement, he just knew where you were? By memory? The janitor sinks a little deeper into the mattress as a look of discomfort slowly forms on his face. “I uh…” he mutters, “Y-you were a little different.”Yea, you frown, you gathered! What’s this about him acting up when you had a close call in the mines, huh? That part of his ‘sidequests’ too?!“No!” He shouts! “Well, yes! But no! But…” pausing to massage his temples, Talbot takes a steadying breath before looking you square in the eyes. “Okay, look: if I tell you the truth will you promise to not be weirded out?”Depends, you hiss, crossing your arms across your chest, is it really gonna be the truth, or is he just trying to get you to go away?“Yes.” He nods. WHICH ONE!? “Christ, the first one! Geez!”In that case…>YES, YOU PROMISE!>NOPE, BUT TELL ME ANYWAYS!>OF COURSE (THAT WAS A LIE)!>FORGET IT–YOU DON’T CARE!>WRITE-IN!
>>5193281>>NOPE, BUT TELL ME ANYWAYS!
>>5193281>>YES, YOU PROMISE!
>>5193281>YES, YOU PROMISE!
A sense of dread courses through your head as you wonder just what, exactly, would make Talbot give you a warning like that. Mulling the decision over for a moment, you respond to him with a genuine, if somewhat impatient, nod. YES, you groan, you promise, okay? Now hurry up and spill the beans–we’re gonna lose what little players we have if we keep talking for a whole other thread!“We have players?” Ly asks, prompting you to flick your own ribs. Hush!“Alright, you asked for it….” Talbot replies in an apprehensive tone. Taking another steadying breath, the ex-murder machine adopts the most serious expression you’ve ever seen. “When um… when… if I’m…”You manage to blurt out the beginning of the word ‘TODAY’ before Ly flicks you in the forehead with your own finger! Ow!“If I close my eyes,” Talbot continues with the speed of a snail made of molasses in December, “and I’m not thinking of something else…” The sound of his fingers drumming on the bed increases exponentially, “You uh… you pop up.”You stumble as if you were just hit in the face with a tennis ball. Wh-wha?!“Where ya’ are, what you’re saying, who you’re talking to,” He lists, counting things off on his fingers, “and uh… if you get hurt, well…” His gaze finally meets yours again. “I feel that too. Not pain, though–more like… I dunno, a ‘ding?’”Anyone else would probably be speechless right now, but not STANLEY PARBLE! Pulling your metaphorical jaw off the floor, you slowly piece together a sentence of your own: d-does that mean he can do it… right now?“Nnnnah…” Talbot replies with a scrunched up face. “Must be that BARRIER we went through on the way in, but I feel great--haven’t thought about you for hours!” He blinks. “Uh… I mean, against my will, or whatever.”Err… wow. That’s all you can manage as his words sink in–that’s uh… that’s bananas…“Yep.” He nods as he taps his sneakers on the plush carpet. “It uh… it only happens if I’m not thinkin’ about other stuff, though, so don’t worry–I’m not gonna creep on you or whatever…”The room’s tension is so thick you could cut it with a butter knife. It fades for a second when you hear LIL’ STANLEY rooting around in the bathroom again, but it’s no use–things are still plenty weird! Do something, Ly!“Nah…” Your skeleton mutters as you and Talbot try to look anywhere but at each other, “I’m still processin’ dis’ stuff too, cupcake…”>CONTD.
>>5193463 Just when you’re about to tell a joke, Talbot breaks the ice first:“Since we’re being truthful and all, I uh… I wanted to say thanks.”Still recovering from the last truth bomb, you shoot him a dazed look. F-for what?“You really gotta make me say it?” He asks, clearly not comfortable with this exchange either, “For, y’know… saving me. Twice.”You’re pretty sure it was more than twice, actually, but just to be sure, you give him a perplexed ‘huh?’ to get some more info out of him.“I mean, back at the LAB you coulda’ just left me there.” The janitor explains, reminding you of your daring escape from the lab in the redwoods. “Don’t know how the hell you did it, but whatever you did woke me up back there… helped me actually think again.” Stretching his neck a bit, he continues as you gingerly take a seat next to him on the bed. “And then you took me with you–that was pretty dumb.”Is he serious?! Without him you probably wouldn’t have escaped that tunnel, let alone took care of the DAM situation! A faint grin forms on Talbot’s face for a moment as you both recall the operation. “Y-yea, but like, what if I turned evil again, huh? Hell, what if I still turn evil?”“So dat’s what dis’ is about…” Ly remarks, prompting you to raise an eyebrow. Huh?“I mean… you even wasted that PEARL on me too!” Talbot continues in a shorter tone! “You had something that could, like, cure ANYTHING, and you used it on me!” His voice raises in urgency and volume with each word. “A-and then you’ve got that Curt jackass talking about thralls and crap, and, like, what if I just wake up tonight and I’m back to being a monster, y’know? A-and what if I lose control and mess someone on the team up!? Like ART?! OR-”You’ve never seen him like this before, but if you had to guess you’d say Big T is pretty miffed about all this… D-do you just let him rant, or?>JUST LET HIM VENT!>SLAP HIM WITH A PILLOW! HE’S TOUGH-HE CAN TAKE IT!>SHAKE HIM AROUND! EARTH TO TALBOT!>USE AN ITEM TO CALM HIM DOWN (WHICH ONE?)!>HUG IT OUT, BITCH!>WRITE-IN!K-K-KISS ON CH-CHEEK?
>>5193464>Slap him with a pillow>Say something motivational, like he's human now-- so there's no way he'll ever be back under Tim's thrall. And you'll kick his butt until he's back to normal if it ever did happen, which it won't!>K-K-KISS ON CH-CHEEK?
Alrighty, it's been a whole day, but this might be a big decision--I have plans later on SUNDAY, but I should be able to whip up and update or two in the morning and later in the evening! Wanna give this decision a fair shake, but if it takes longer than expected I'll just run with the action that's been voted for.Hope to see you then!
>>5193502Some anon said it pretty well a few threads back: Human Talbot is definitely a dingus. But it's nice to know he actually does have good intentions, he just hides them behind arrogance and moronity. Pretty much exactly like us, now that I think about it.But yeah, this.
>>5193502>>5194020>>5194026>>5194053>THE OLE' ONE, TWO, THREE!Sorry, all, today became MAD busy! Writing now!
Halfway through his ramblings, Talbot is interrupted by a pillow to the gob! “OW! Who the hell do you think you are, DICK!?”STANLEY-FRIGGIN’-PARBLE, you growl as you dodge his attempt to grab the pillow from your hands! Who the hell does he think HE is, huh?! Because you thought you were talking to TALBOT-FRIGGIN’-SCHUMER!Your response takes Talbot more off-guard than the pillow did. “Wh-huh?” He asks in a tone that matches his bewildered face.He heard you, you continue as you stuff the pillow behind your back! So now that you’re both sure his ears are working, how about he tries this on for size: the fact that he’s worrying about things right now? That dumb, but sorta endearing look on his face? All of the bragging, boasting, and stupid arguments? Those are all proof of one thing:“Dat’ he’s a jerk?”Well yea, but that’s besides the point, you mutter under your breath. They mean, you continue, that despite it all, Talbot’s HUMAN, damn it! When’s the last time he’s seen a THRALL or whatever worry about turning on his pals?“W-well-”You saved him in that lab for a reason, okay? And you used that PEARL on him for a reason too! And no matter what’s going through his head right now, you continue, egged on by the growing intensity and volume of your voice, you’ll be here ready to reign him back in again! Doesn’t matter if it’s a pep-talk or a kick in the ass–you’ll be there to punt him back into the NORMAL ZONE, and that’s a PROMISE!Talbot stares at you speechless–it’s unclear whether he’s digesting your words or still processing them, but one thing’s for sure: you definitely left him flatfooted! In fact, for a brief moment you notice a softer, thankful look in the janitor’s eyes as you catch your breath. Something about his expression puts your body into autopilot, however, and before you can stop you find yourself leaning in to plant a kiss on the boy’s cheek–one that lasts too long to be considered a peck, but just short of being awkward!All the same, you immediately recoil with a face redder than a tomato as Talbot’s soft expression turns to one of abject surprise! Retreating to the far end of the bed, you use your pillow as a barrier as the excess blood slowly flows away from your cheeks and your heart struggles to calm down again.A-and, you stammer, not daring to look him in the eyes, th-that’s j-just to seal the d-dealPROMISE! You mean PROMISE!“Golly, Stan,” Ly remarks in a bemused tone, “dat’s THREE now, ain’t it?”Three WHAT!? Y-you’re just k-keeping your team in working order, you spit as you peek over the pillow at your bodyguard…Only to find him looking directly at you!>CONTD.
>>5194870You immediately start drafting insults. Comebacks. Ammo for the inevitable gloating and teasing. This is it, you mutter to yourself as Talbot turns your way with a dreamy look on his face, you’ll never hear the end of it once he tells the others! I-It was just another encouraging kiss, damn it, it didn’t mean anything! A gasp of horror escapes your lips as you consider the implications: if… if ART finds out-This time it’s your turn to be interrupted mid-rant. Leaning in close, Talbot stares deep into your eyes as you find yourself catatonic! LY, you shout out in your head, DO SOMETHING!And that’s when it connects–you barely even noticed the pillow slip from your hand. Smacking you upside the head with it, Talbot gives you a wry grin as he lets his weapon drop to the floor.“Hate to say it, Stan, but you’re right…”Bit by bit the tracksuited terror’s confidence comes back–from the brazen angles of his stupid hair to the cocksure look in his eyes. “Maybe I DO have some pieces of that shitheel LICH floatin’ around in me, and maybe I AM still a freak thanks to those nerds at the lab!”You feel a warm, firm hand slap you on the back as your fellow Evening Sanitation Coordinator gives you a genuine smile!“Sure, I might be much stronger than you now given what we saw at the saloon,” He adds as his hand lingers on your back, “but every time I’ve stood on the brink, you’ve been there to pull me back up again.”He knows you threw that match, right? You can still totally kick his as- “Don’t be a sore loser. Anyways,” he sighs as you consider the pros and cons of slugging him in the jaw, “I’m not good at this kind of stuff, so stretch those ears open and listen good, okay?” As Talbot leans in even closer, your murderous intent fades as your heart kicks into high gear again. “I uh… I’m glad… that you’re… you’re there. For me. Okay?”You respond with a weak nod. O-okay.And that’s when HE goes to kiss YOUR cheek!STANLEY EMERGENCY SYSTEMS ACTIVATED! RESPONSE TIME RAISED TO MAXIMUM SPEED! REFLEXES BOOSTED ACCORDINGLY! ACTIONS REQUIRED–CHOOSE ONE OF THE FOLLOWING!>LET HIM! IT’S ONLY FAIR!>EVASIVE MANEUVERS! LEAP TO SAFETY!>DEPLOY COUNTERMEASURES! POSSIBLE INTERCEPTING TOOLS INCLUDE: PILLOW, RACCOON, OR ITEM!>WRITE-IN!INTERCEPT WITH LIPS!
>>5194874>INTERCEPT WITH LIPS!
>>5194874>DEPLOY COUNTERMEASURES! POSSIBLE INTERCEPTING TOOLS INCLUDE: PILLOW, RACCOON, OR ITEM!push our shades down to block!
>>5194874>WRITE-INFreeze up like a deer in headlights, start smiling dumbly like a schoolgirl after his lips leave our skin, and then immediately try and cover it up.
Looks like a three-way split here and it's a bit late on my end--I'll keep this open until MONDAY AROUND 5-6PM PST... Maybe earlier! If there's no clear winner at that point I'll probably roll a tiebreaker to keep things moving! We'll see what happens, though.Until then, however, have a good week! Hope your Monday doesn't suck too much!
>>5195136>>5194874Ok, this is a fantastic write-in. Switching to this.
>>5195217>Ok, this is a fantastic write-inShoot, now you got me blushing like a school girl.
>>5194893>SHADE TACTICS!>>5195136>>5195217>>5195230>FREEZE!Makes ya feel all warm and fuzzy, don't it? Writing!
>>5195756I was tempted to vote the raccoon just because it would have been hilarious.
ERROR: ‘SMOOTH MOVES’ NOT FOUND!Feeling your mind go limp like a handful of cold chow fun, your skin prickles and your heart starts beating faster than a drummer in a metal band as Talbot’s lips plant a similarly-timed kiss on your still-red cheek!If you were capable of forming a sentence, you’d probably mumble something along the lines of ‘y-you too…’ right now, but in absence of any cognitive function you instead let out a stupefied ‘nyeheheh’ until the boy pulls away. It’s only a few, blissful seconds later that you realize you’re grinning like a schoolgirl–not, like, you as a schoolgirl, obviously, but… okay, you get the picture.Ly lets loose an uncomfortable cough as Talbot turns away to hide a face nearly as red as yours! “S-super!” He mutters as you let out another dopey giggle, “And uh, don’t, like, act like this is a big deal or anything… I uh… I give PROMISE KISSES t-to girls all the time, alright?!”You gurgle something between a giggle and a swoon in response. “Da’ HELL are those lazy NERVOUS SYSTEM bastards doin’, anyways!?” Groans your skeleton as you, in a desperate bid to escape from the current situation, flop face down onto the nearest pillow. With your air supply somewhat cut off by your self-induced smothering, you slowly regain control over your body… but just barely!That… that was some PROMISE KISS!“Err… R-real talk, though…” Talbot mutters as you continue to impersonate roadkill, “L-let’s keep that between us, yea? D-don’t wanna make anyone jealous…”O-of course not! Breaking free of your plush prison, you rise once more into a sitting position still breathing heavily! If your friends found out…“Yea, they uh… they’d just get the wrong idea.” Talbot says, finishing your sentence for you. “It’s better this way!”Totally. TOTALLY. Adjusting your shades on your still-red face, you work up the courage to look him in the face once more. So, uh, is he good?“Yea…” He replies, the word trailing off into space. “I just… You think that Curt prick was right? About TIM just, y’know, taking the wheel?”No, you snap as your remaining bashfulness is drained by the sound of Curt’s name! You cured him with that MERMAID PEARL, damn it! That means he’s safe!“Y-yea…” Talbot nods, “I guess you’re right..”You narrow your eyes at his pensive face. Does he need an ass-kicking right now to clear his mind?“Hah! Don’t start what you can’t finish!” He smirks, slowly regaining that stupid confidence of his!… not that you’re relieved, or anything!>CONTD.
>>5195787That settled, you let your posture relax a little as the two of you remain seated on the bed while LIL’ STANLEY serenades you with the sound of skittering claws and bathroom mischief. “Dat’ don’t sound good…” Ly remarks, fishing for a fresh conversation topic. Nope, you agree, whatever it is, though, you ain’t cleaning it up!“The raccoon, huh?” Talbot asks, sparing a bemused glance towards the bathroom. “That thing got a name? Because I’ve got one or two in min-”STANLEY, you interrupt, preemptively using your ‘watch your step’ tone, and if he says ONE WORD you’re gonna knock his damn lights out!“HAH! I owe whoever named her that a beer!”Yea, you scoff, the two of ‘em can share a drink or two along with a KNUCKLE SANDWICH!“You said it was an experiment, right? That mean-”Yea, you nod as you spot two glowing orbs peering at you from the dark recesses of the bathroom, she’s not your average trash panda, that’s for sure.“Cool.” The janitor remarks as the beast slinks back into the shadows. “Now I won’t feel bad about chucking it at the jerks who attack us.”You smirk. He wouldn’t feel bad about it even if it DIDN’T have super powers!“Nah…” Talbot shrugs with a sly grin, “I got a soft spot for critters like her. Must be wh-er, I mean…”Punctuating his sentence with a forced cough, your ex-bodyguard looks your way expectantly. “We uh… we done here? I uh… I think I left a, uh… CONTACT LENSE over by the pool… better head back there to look for it…”Yea right, you hiss! He has a point, though–anything else while you’ve got him here?>WHAT’S HIS DEAL, ANYWAYS? WHY IS HE SUCH A JERK ALL THE TIME?>WHAT DOES HE REMEMBER FROM BEFORE HE BECAME A MURDER SKELETON?>HE REALLY HATES DENISE, DOESN’T HE?>HE’S A COWORKER–WHAT’S HIS TAKE ON GOOD BOY?>HYPNOTICALLY SPEAKING, IS THERE ANYONE ON THE TEAM ACTING FISHY?>NAH, THAT’S IT. TAKE A HIKE!>WRITE-IN!
>>5195789>NAH, THAT’S IT. TAKE A HIKE!
>>5195789>>NAH, THAT’S IT. TAKE A HIKE!
>>5195797>>5195871>TAKE A HIKE!Sorry, got distracted by that Devour game. Good shit! Writing the last update of the evening!
You got what you wanted… the INTEL, that is! Shaking your head, your eyes follow the tracksuited terror all the way to your bedroom door. Gently pulling it open, Talbot lingers just long enough to send a quizzical look your way. “You uh… you comin’, or what?”You’ll catch up, you reply in an unusually chipper voice, still not entirely sure what your next move is! Something in your response puts a smile on the janitor’s face, and with a look that says ‘your loss’, he shoots a lazy wave your way before leaving you to on your lonesome.That was… educational.“Heh. You wish!”Still giddy from whatever just happened, you opt to let Ly off the hook… this time! Feeling your heart finally cool down from all the overtime it just pulled, you’re roused from your dreamy state by the silhouette of a familiar trash panda scurrying towards the bed! Before you can intercept, STANLEY has already tackled your side, her unusually-sharp claws digging at your pockets for another treat. So that’s how it is, huh? Nodding at your query, the raccoon eagerly rubs her paws together in anticipation of another feast–on your dime, no less! Picking the beastie up by the scruff of her neck, you give her a stern finger-wagging as she struggles to gnaw it off! Pace yourself, FATTIE!Holding the adorable woodland critter out of mauling range, you contemplate your next action: you’re pretty sure you hit all your meetings, so what’s next? Are you forgetting anything?“Dat’ GALA thrown by Curt’s pals is happenin’ tonight…” Ly reminds you as your pet gnashes her teeth in protest. “Could be worth checkin’ out if lets us case the joint.”True, you muse, but it’s happening TONIGHT, right? That’s, like, hours from now! And you’ve got nothing to wear!“Yea,” Ly scoffs, “Dat’ was my biggest worry too!”Well that didn’t sound genuine.>CONTD.
>>5195912“Just thought I’d mention it, cupcake.” Ly sighs. “If ya’ ask me, I’d just hit da’ road–we’ve only got dat’ SEA WITCH left ta’ ice, an’ somethin’ tells me dat’ aint’ gonna be easy…”He ain’t wrong–you’ve got that SEA CLOAK to breathe underwater, of course, but there’s no way you can fit ‘em all under that!“Don’t think it works dat’ way…” Ly mutters as you toss the critter back into the depths of the bathroom! “There’s dat’ lead at da’ MUSEUM we can follow up–sounds like some of da’ witch’s goons headed there.” The skeleton borrows your face and scrunches it up. “Now dat’ I think about it, there’s those MISSIN’ PEOPLE, too… we oughta look into dat’. AndTRAITORS?”Don’t REMIND me! Feeling your head start to spin from all the possibilities, you clutch your skull and collapse onto the bed–when the Hell did everything become so busy anyways!?“When ya’ decided ta’ save da’ day, I guess.” Ly replies, borrowing your shoulders for a shrug. “Tends ta’ complicate things.”No kidding!Locking eyes with the ones menacing you from the bathroom entrance, you drum your fingers on the bed as you go over your choices one more time in your head. Whatever you wanna do, you say to no one in particular, you can figure it out once you’re done here, right?Sitting upright, you ultimately decide to:>CHECK IN WITH ONE OF YOUR PALS (WHO?)>TAKE A QUICK CAT NAP!>GATHER EVERYONE TO HIT THE DAMN ROAD!>INVESTIGATE AN ITEM CLOSER! (WHICH ONE?)>SCOPE OUT ANOTHER PART OF THE BUNKER (COMMONS, ARENA, ADMIN, SECURITY?)>WRITE-IN!
That's it for tonight--should pick things up again TUESDAY AROUND 4-5PM PST! Thanks again for playing and hope to see you then!
>>5195913>TAKE A QUICK CAT NAP!
Gonna leave this open a little longer to get a better consensus--otherwise we'll go ahead with that SNOOZE CROOZE.
>>5195913>>TAKE A QUICK CAT NAP!
You’re in the BEDroom, right? Why the hell aren’t you using it? Kicking your galoshes off your feet, you lift your legs onto the bed and make yourself comfy in the mountain of pillows behind your head!“Now dat’ I think about it,” Ly remarks as you fish ALLIE GATOR, BEVERLEY BEAVER, THE MERMAID PLUSH, AND THE STUFFED STANLEY YOU GOT FROM THAT VENT URCHIN out from your pockets and place them at your side, “da’ last real bed we slept in was in dat’ CAMPGROUND, yea?”Yep, you nod as you squeeze your stuffed menagerie close to your chest, and you barely got any sleep that night! “Wouldn’t call last night too restful either…” Your weary bones add, prompting your mind to wander back to you and Talbot frozen in place at the JOPLIN WELCOME CENTER LOBBY. The less said about that the better…“‘Spose we’re owed a few Z’s, yea?” Ly asks, earning a nod and a yawn from you. Damn right, you are. And if anyone interrupts you… You send a warning glare in the direction of the bathroom. If the owner of the glowing eyes within comprehends, they sure as hell don’t show it. Concluding that that’s the best you’re gonna get, you allow your heavy eyelids to drop over your tired eyes, and before you know it you’re whisked away to an all-too-familiar place…https://youtu.be/23qEArWaLjsTHE DREAM ZONE!Where are we headed toni-err, today? Hard to tell in this concrete tomb you’re sleeping in… Anyways, be sure to WRITE IN anything in particular you’d like to see… lest the QM has to… IMPROVISE! DUN DUN DUUUUUN!Alright, I’ll shut up now. Where you goin’, kid?>A GOOD DREAM!>A NIGHTMARE!>A MEMORY!>JUST SLEEP, DAMN IT–QUIT IT WITH THE DREAMS ALREADY!>WRITE-IN!
>>5196604>>A MEMORY!the wedding?
>>5196611Sure, I'll run with this.
>>5196611>>5196733>A MEMORY!You friggin' asked for it... writing!
https://youtu.be/hmnnywt-0NYYou’re buzzed, that’s for sure. Draining the remaining bubbly from the glass in your hands, you let out an exultant sigh as you feel the booze tickle you from your tongue to your tummy leaving you with a pleasant, if not somewhat dry feeling on your tongue. Not bad, you remark to no one in particular, not bad at all!A faint sea breeze tickles your bare shoulders as you watch partygoers flit between white, billowing tents along the coastal cliffside like ants at a picnic. Your trusty FEMININE INTUITION tells you that you know some of them–that you’ve met some of them before, maybe, but as you pleasantly sway on your high heeled shoes, you find your hazy head coming up blank.Great.Gently tugging the hem of your SLINKY BLACK DRESS lower, you give the faceless masses a look of contempt–probably all of HER friends and family. As you twirl the empty champagne glass in your hand, an unpleasant thought occurs to you–you’re gonna have to MINGLE with them, aren’t you?You subconsciously take another sip from your glass before remembering it’s empty. Dang it! Regarding the cup with a rueful sigh, you resolve to try and make the most of the situation–not like it’s your special day, after all. ‘Stiff upper lint’, or whatever dad would say…You’ve been here before, though, haven’t you? That’s how you know where you went next…>YOU WENT TO REFRESH YOUR DRINK! OPEN BAAAAAAR, DUUUUUUDE!>YOU TRIED TO FIND YOUR BROTHER–HE COULD SPARE A FEW MOMENTS FOR HIS SIS, RIGHT?>YOU BUMPED INTO YOUR PARENTS–THEY SEEMED TO BE HAVING A GOOD TIME!>YOU HIT THE DANCE FLOOR! >YOU FOUND SOME NEW FACES TO MINGLE WITH!YOU CAN’T CHANGE THE PAST.>WRITE-IN!
>>5196799That's it for tonight, all--should be ready for more WEDNESDAY AROUND 4-5PM PST! Thanks again for playing and hope to see you then!
>>5196799>>YOU FOUND SOME NEW FACES TO MINGLE WITH!
>>5196799>YOU TRIED TO FIND YOUR BROTHER–HE COULD SPARE A FEW MOMENTS FOR HIS SIS, RIGHT?
>>5196799>YOU FOUND SOME NEW FACES TO MINGLE WITH!
>>5196813>>5197391>MINGLEEEEE>>5196875>TRACK DOWN THE BROWriting!
You’re single–that means you should be ready to mingle! That’s how the saying goes, right? You’ve been drinking since before the ceremony, so why do you still feel so damn wound up, huh?! Knowing that ART BITCH Sue loves so much, she probably forced him to grab, like, ORGANIC-GLUTEN-FREE-FREE-RANGE-CRUELTY-FREE-NON-ALCOHOLIC BOOZE or whatever flavor of bullshit she’s feeding him this week. And here you are celebrating her officially sinking her succubus claws into Sue!You really oughta’ bug Syb about banishing hexes later…Letting your spent ‘champagne’ glass fall to the grass, you stomp off in the direction of the other reception guests–it’s a long shot, of course, but maybe someone there can cure you of whatever the hell it is you’re feeling?Man, nothing exciting ever happens in CLEARWATER…Pushing your way back into the throngs of wedding guests converging under the countless white tents along the cliffside, you spot a few promising candidates amidst the sea of sheep:>THREE PEOPLE ABOUT YOUR AGE STAND HUDDLED IN THE CORNER OF A TENT DRINKING AND CONVERSING!>A BOOKISH, SLIGHTLY-OLDER GUY STEALS GLANCES AT HIS CELLPHONE AS HE SLOWLY ORBITS THE RECEPTION!>A YOUNGER GIRL… HIGH SCHOOL, MAYBE? SITS ALONE AT AN EMPTY TABLE ENGROSSED IN SOME SORT OF PORTABLE GAME CONSOLE!>AN OLDER WOMAN WITH ROSY CHEEKS AND AN ‘OLD-TIMEY’ LOOK ABOUT HER NURSES AN UNIDENTIFIABLE DRINK IN HER HANDS!>HOLY SHIT, IS THAT A DOG!?YOU KNOW HOW THIS ENDS.>WRITE-IN!
>>5197673>>AN OLDER WOMAN WITH ROSY CHEEKS AND AN ‘OLD-TIMEY’ LOOK ABOUT HER NURSES AN UNIDENTIFIABLE DRINK IN HER HANDS!
>>5197673>AN OLDER WOMAN WITH ROSY CHEEKS AND AN ‘OLD-TIMEY’ LOOK ABOUT HER NURSES AN UNIDENTIFIABLE DRINK IN HER HANDS!
Rolled 1 (1d2)>>5197673>1 = BOOKISH GUY>2 = OLDER LADYRolling cause I feel like rolling
So is there any reason we decided to choose the older woman? I voted on it because it seemed to be a solid consensus and I had no better ideas.
>>5197756I have no clue. That wasn't my first choice-- curious as to others' rationales though.
Well you'll have a bit more time to discuss it--feel like shit right now and I only blame a piece of it on booze. Will check back in THURSDAY AROUND 4-5PM PST-- hoping it was just a long day. Will probably write up Older Lady by then!
>>5197716>>5197720>>5197734>>5197743>OLDER WOMAN!Alrighty, the older woman it is! Writing!
Surveying your several, if not somewhat still limited, options, one partygoer sticks out like a clown in a herd of sheep: an impressively-tall woman wrapped in a black feather boa, a matching cocktail dress, and a wide-brimmed hat extending further than should be legal, you think. Despite her gaudy appearance, it takes you a moment to confirm whether she’s real or a trick of the light–though she trades a few polite greetings with the partygoers around her, you can’t help but notice something… off... about the air around her–like a mirage on a particularly toasty day.You’re making a beeline for her before you know it. Sensing your approach from across the tent, she gives you a bemused grin from under her hat as she steals a sip from an amber drink in her black-gloved hands.“Well now this is a welcome surprise…” she coos as you close the gap, “and just when I was growing bored, to boot!”You respond to her greeting with a forced grin. That’s booze, right? Gimme a sip!“Oho~”she replies with a sly grin, “Find yourself another glass, dear, and I’ll give you more than that...” Drumming her gloved fingers against her drink with a melodic series of ‘tink’s, the woman gives you an appraising look. “If I may be so bold, I doubt a mere drink will cure what ails you…”You respond with a scowl–who does she think she is playing doctor, huh? You’re peachy aside from your ‘Nodrinkitis’ flaring up!“Heavens, me, where are my manners?” She gasps, bringing a shocked hand in front of her agape mouth! “I’m HAZEL, dear, but everyone calls me AUNTIE... Not that I’m THAT old, of course!” She adds with a singular laugh. “Charmed, I’m sure.”You’re not, but it’s a start, you reply with a growl! “And you must be the groom’s sister STANLEY…” Continues Auntie Hazel as she takes another polite sip from her glass. That’s too good for a guess, you snap! “That’s because it wasn’t one, my dear.” She replies, cocking her hatted head to the side. “We’ve met on several occasions in the past, but I doubt you remember many of them, if at all–You were rather young for most of them, you see.”You shrug your pale shoulders–if you had a nickel for every relative who told you that today, you wouldn’t need to scrub bone dust for a living! Suspicions sated, but not wholly removed, you give the woman a sideways glance–say what you will about your other uncles and aunts, you feel like you’d definitely remember her!>CONTD.
>>5198565“Yes,” she replies, cupping a hand to her mouth as a jovial barely manages to escape, “I DO tend to leave my mark on people–nothing new there!” Shaking her head with a smile, the woman takes a seat in a nearby folding chair and motions for you to follow suit. “Now tell me, dear, why do you look so glum on such a joyous occasion? It’s a wedding, not a funeral, after all.”Yea, you groan, you NOTICED. Taking a seat next to Aunt Hazel, you give the passing wedding guests a look of disapproval as they shuffle around the reception. Who cares, anyways? There a law saying you have to be happy at a wedding?“Hah! Imagine!” The woman laughs, mirthfully slapping her knee! “To be perfectly frank, Stanley, I don’t like them either… weddings, that is.”You blink at the unexpected response. Come again?“Yes, yes, it’s fine and all to be merry,” she explains as she waves her drink around in disdain, “but what are we celebrating, really?” Taking another sip from her drink, Auntie looks at you expectantly. “Well?”You can’t help but be somewhat taken aback–is she serious?“Gregarious as I am, my dear, I’m ALWAYS serious.” She answers with a finality in her tone. Well then… what ARE you celebrating, anyways?>YOUR BROTHER GETTING HITCHED, DUH!>SOME ART BITCH TAKING YOUR BROTHER AWAY!>A UNION BETWEEN, LIKE, A MAN AND A WOMAN? SOME RELIGIOUS CONTRACT, RIGHT?>YOU LOSING YOUR BROTHER TO THE OTHER SIDE OF THE DAMN COUNTRY!NONE OF THIS MATTERS.>WRITE-IN!
>>5198568>SOME ART BITCH TAKING YOUR BROTHER AWAY!
>>5198565>>SOME ART BITCH TAKING YOUR BROTHER AWAY!
Oh, you’ll tell her what you’re celebrating, you growl, clenching your fists at your sides as your booze-soaked blood begins to boil! You’re celebrating some ART BITCH snatching your brother away! Glaring at a few concerned-looking passersby, you continue your answer with a defeated hand gesture! I mean, you continue, did she hear what they said back there at the altar?! ‘Til death do us part!’ What the hell kind of sicko shit is that, anyways?! “You’re celebrating the loss of your brother Sue,” responds the woman with an understanding nod. “And all that entails…” Turning her head your way, you just barely manage to duck under the brim of her hat as she leans forward to take your hand in hers. Uh… STRANGER DANGER?“You shoulder quite the burden, dear, though no one else can see it.” Says your aunt in a sympathetic tone. “So why continue to carry it?”You respond with a confused blink. Uh, Earth to Crazy Lady: you’re his sister, not, like, his dad or whatever! You can’t exactly say who he can and can’t marry, alright?“Why not?” She asks, cocking her head to the side again. “Do you not have a say in your brother’s wellbeing? Do you not know who he is? What he values? What he dreams of?”She leans closer. Close enough for you to smell the peculiar alcohol on her black-painted lips. You can’t place the flavor.“Do you not want to save him?”An icy finger works its way down your spine as you pull away from the strange woman. ...E-exsqueeze me?>CONTD.
>>5198621A mischievous smile creeps across the woman’s pale face as the sea breeze picks up around you sending the tents and party goers into delighted disarray! “You feel it, don’t you? The wind is heavy with possibilities today…”Craning her ear to the side, you find yourself copying the gesture. For a moment all you pick up is excited chatter. Music from the DJ booth. Waves crashing on the rocks below.But then you feel it–a faint tingle in the air… like the buildup of static you feel standing next to an electric fence. Just when you start to really taste it, though, the feeling subsides.Freaky.“Yes…” Hazel muses as she takes another sip from her glass, “you feel it too, don’t you? Pure, undiluted POTENTIAL.”She takes a deep, exultant breath as you try and fail to look like you aren’t sitting with her. What the hell is she talking about, anyways? And when are you getting that sip you asked for, huh?!“You don’t want a sip.” Aunt Hazel explains in a weary tone. “And you don’t want your brother either, Stanley.”Oh yea, you ask, thirty seconds away from clawing this bitch, and what, pray tell, does she think you want, exactly?“Hmm…” She hums, tapping her finger on the side of her cheek in thought, “... What do you want, Stanley? Really?”DAMN, SHE’S GOOD! She just turned that around on you! Now that you think about it, though…What DO you want?>FAME! FRIENDS! FAMILY! YOU DON’T WANT TO BE ALONE!>FREEDOM! YOU WANT THE MEANS TO DO WHATEVER THE HELL YOU WANT!>EXCITEMENT! YOU WANT AN ESCAPE FROM YOUR SHITTY, BORING LIFE!>A DRINK, DAMN IT! YOU’VE SAID IT TWICE NOW!>NAH, YOU AREN’T PLAYING THIS ANYMORE. BUH-BYE!MEANINGLESS.>WRITE-IN!
>>5198622>FREEDOM! YOU WANT THE MEANS TO DO WHATEVER THE HELL YOU WANT!This is the most STAN option.
>>5198622>FAME! FRIENDS! FAMILY! YOU DON’T WANT TO BE ALONE!I personally feel this one clicks with Stan's backstory the closest. She spent a solid portion of her childhood in and out of hospitals, ridiculed and ostracized for her unusual behavior and the things she did during her blackouts, and the only one who she found real comfort with until she got much older was her brother. Maybe it'd be better to say she doesn't want to be a weirdo. She might just want to be someone who isn't a burden to her parents and brother and/or who doesn't need to be patronized and looked down on the way Boris and others do to her. I can't think of a write-in that makes sense, though.
>>5198622>>FAME! FRIENDS! FAMILY! YOU DON’T WANT TO BE ALONE!Switching vote cause I like this guy's rationale. >>5198714
>>5198622>FREEDOM! YOU WANT THE MEANS TO DO WHATEVER THE HELL YOU WANT!Don't tell me the fairy is behind our blackouts
>>5198718For all we know, dude, we could be the result of some kind of family curse one of our ancestors bequeathed unto us via their dealings with the fae. Or maybe the fae make a habit of sniffing out potential morons and/or desperate and hopeless folks to make contracts with later, kind of like a scout for baseball or other sports.
Bones is kill. Goodnight, my prince.
>>5198780Whoops, got a little too into St. Paddy's Day and hit the sack! Anyways, should be ready for more updates FRIDAY around 4-5pm PST! Thanks for playing!
>>5198714>>5198717>FAME!>>5198718>FREEDOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM *BAGPIPES INTENSIFY*Writing!
Okay, okay, okay–you think you get it now: she’s drunk! Blitzed, even! That’s why this broad’s acting all mysterious and asking you these weird questions! Looking at your uh, ‘Auntie’ with a relieved smirk, you feel your inhibitions floating away knowing she’s not even gonna remember your name come this time tomorrow!Well, you begin with a drawn-out sigh, if she really wants to know-“I do.” She interrupts, watching you with renewed interest. Easy, Stan, you think to yourself, it’s just her booze talking! And speaking of, maybe it’s your past drinks talking, but a part of you feels somewhat emboldened by the situation–enough so that when you open your mouth again, something surprisingly truthful comes out:You want to be remembered, you explain as you try and fail to look your conversation partner in her obscured eyes. By lots of people. A BUNCH.“Fame…” Murmurs Auntie Hazel as the corner of her mouth curls upwards. “You seek renown.”Yea, you nod! Except… well, no. Not exactly. You just… maybe this whole wedding thing is putting your life into perspective, you know?The woman cocks her head to the side. “Whatever do you mean?”You respond by gesturing to the party around you. Isn’t it obvious? There’s gotta be at least, like, twenty people here and you barely know any of them! “Surely your friends are around here somewhere…” Hazel replies as she takes a sip from her drink.You wish! First your friend Gus couldn’t make it because he’s working all day at his stupid PIZZA GIG! Then your bestie Sybil had some dumbass eldritch conference to attend today, so of course SHE couldn’t make it either! You’re always there when she needs you, so why can’t she spare some of her time to… To…You pause to wipe the haze from your eyes as the woman watches with interest. Booze must be messing with your eyes, damn it!“And now your brother will be spirited away to a whole new life.” The woman confirms in a solemn tone. “Do you fear being alone, Stanley?”The word stabs your chest like an invisible knife. W-wha?! N-no, you snap, you don’t care what people do with their lives, okay? “Why should you?” Hazel asks, drumming her fingers against her glass. “All that time and effort you’ve invested–it’s discomforting to know that it could all fall to pieces over one… what did you say? ‘Art Bitch?”Yea, you mutter as you wipe the excess moisture from your eyes, exactly!>CONTD.
>>5199607You can’t decide if you want to slug her or give her a hug–she’s not, like, a shrink or something, right? How does she get all this?“No, my dear, I’m nothing like that…” She purrs, squeezing your palm a bit tighter. “But you don’t need to be a ‘shrink’ to see which way the tides flow…”The two of you look down the cliff towards the ebbing tide below–its foamy surface tinted orange by the setting sun.“Tell me, Stanley: would you like me to read your fortune?” Hazel asks with a hint of excitement in her voice. "No charge, of course... not for family, that is!"How do you respond?>SURE, WHY NOT?>NO–I MAKE MY OWN FATE!>GIMME A SIP ALREADY!>I’M OUTTA HERE. ENJOY THE BOOZE, WEIRDIE!YOU KNOW IT ALREADY.>WRITE-IN!
>>5199610>GIMME A SIP ALREADY!We got Syb for that. We don't have booze at the moment. Booze always helps you make good decisions.
>>5199610>>GIMME A SIP ALREADY!
>>5199610>GIMME A SIP ALREADY!
>>5199675>>5199680>>5199682>THE SIP, YOU DIP!Writing! Got some plans after this, so can't promise another update til SATURDAY AROUND 3-4PM PST! Might be later than that, but we'll see how the day goes.
Oof, you groan, you’re uh… you’re good, actually. You’re good. Ever since Sybil took that correspondence course on THE THIRD EYE that’s all she wants to do at your sleepovers nowadays! You barely even snuggle any more!“Are you certain?” She asks, the previously-described excitement quickly fading. “Perhaps it’s for the best–one shouldn’t live their lives governed by some mere prediction-”Yep, yep, yep, you interrupt as you pantomime a mouth with your hand! Now if she really wants to make you happy, you continue with a devious grin, she should make like a REAL cool aunt and give you a sippy already! It’s been, like, minutes since your last drink!…Maybe HOURS!“Take it from me, dear: this-” The woman pauses mid sentence as a new thought replaces her current one. “Well, I suppose a taste couldn’t hurt…” Slowly handing over the glass, you immediately feel a palpable warmth from the drink–this isn’t one of those cocktails you set on fire, is it?“... no,” your aunt replies, “I’m afraid it isn’t.”You probably regard the amber liquid for a good attosecond or two before banishing your inhibitions with a shrug. This shit’s got her speaking like some fantasy game NPC–surely it will lighten your mood a little? Bringing the drink to your parched lips, you hear the woman’s voice from behind the glass.“All that you seek, my dear, you shall find–though not without searching first.”The booze barely touches your tongue before sending a sensation akin to an angry weasel clawing its way down your throat! “Be vigilant–for the road ahead is littered with distractions–some more daunting than the rest.”Tears run down your face as you fail to wrestle the devil’s drink from your mouth… all while your face glows red hot with an unearthly heat!“Confusion–heartbreak–betrayal: all of these cut deeper than any knife or bullet, but you must endure to find what you seek.”You feel your breath catch in your throat as the glass finally drops from your hands. Just as the vessel crashes to the grass below, you hear a faint purr passing by in the wind…“Take care, dear–not all strangers will greet you with kind words and a strong drink…”Like the sensation you sensed in the wind, the woman fades from your senses leaving you with a stinging throat, a sweaty face, a broken glass, and a head full of questions.Before you can answer any of them, your thoughts are interrupted by a tinking of metal against a glass–a timeless cue that even you can understand: food’s about to be served! Quietly creeping away from the glass’ shattered remains, you nearly stumble to your knees as a powerful gust buffets your shaky form!Barely keeping your high-heeled balance, you stagger off in the direction the others are headed quietly pondering just what the hell was in that drink!>CONTD.
>>5199728You awaken to the sensation of someone, or something, digging through your pockets. Ripping free of sleep’s clutches, you send ALLIE GATOR and her growing entourage tumbling to the floor as you bolt upright in your private bunker’s swanky bed! Sensing danger, LIL’ STANLEY’S blurry form scurries away from your hip with a bag of PICKLE CHIPS hanging from her jaws! Little creep!Stumbling after her in a daze, you completely misjudge how much space you have as you topple headfirst over the edge of your bed and land in a heap amidst your stuffed animals on the floor! Groaning in pain, you give the retreating form of your new pet a menacing hiss as she retreats into the bathroom once more. “Good mornin’, sunshine.” Ly remarks with a smile in his voice as you pick yourself off the floor. “You slept like a bear, ya’ know dat’?”No, you grumble, wiping the residual sleep from your eyes, you didn’t... what’d you miss, anyways?“Well it’s definitely later in da’ day…” Report your bones. “Not late enough for dat’ GALA Syb was talkin’ about, but it ain’t early anymore.” Borrowing your neck, Ly points your head towards a bowl of lukewarm soup forlornly sitting on your end table.‘You looked comfy, so I didn’t want to wake you. Come see me when you’re up and I’ll warm it up! ~<3 Kiki’Clearly. Gathering the STUFFED SQUAD and stuffing them into your pockets, you contemplate your next actions. These dreams just keep getting weirder and weirder, huh? What’s next?>TALK TO SYB ABOUT YOUR DREAMS OR SOMETHING!>CHECK IN WITH DENISE ABOUT THOSE LISTENING BUGS!>GET THOSE DAMN PICKLE CHIPS BACK!>WARM UP THIS DAMN SOUP IN THE KITCHEN!>PREPARE FOR THAT GALA!>GATHER EVERYONE TO PLAN YOUR NEXT MOVE!>TRACK DOWN SOMEONE ELSE (WHO?)>WRITE-IN!
>>5199731>WARM UP THIS DAMN SOUP IN THE KITCHEN!Get some homecookin in our belly and then we can figure out what to do.
>>5199731>WARM UP THIS DAMN SOUP IN THE KITCHEN!
>>5199731>TALK TO SYB ABOUT YOUR DREAMS OR SOMETHING!
>>5199731>>WARM UP THIS DAMN SOUP IN THE KITCHEN!
>>5199739>>5199740>>5199840>A SOUPENDOUS IDEA!>>5199837>DREAM TALLLLLK!Writing a quick update before shit starts happening today!
Removing Kiki’s note from the side of the soup bowl, you deftly crumple it up and spike it into a nearby waste basket!… whoops, missed. Let’s try that again.Damn it.SHIT!“Can you just put it in already so we ca-”Hold on, Ly, this is the on-alright nevermind let’s just put it in. Empowered by your current outfit, you skillfully place the waste inside the basket before returning to the bowl of soup sitting on your end table. As you pick it up, you hear again the sound of claws skittering across linoleum along with the telltale crumple of a bag of chips.Guess you aren’t getting those back, are ya?Creeping over to the bathroom door, you gently push it shut as the room fills with the sound of rapid crunching.“Dat ain’t gonna hold her, ya’ know.” Ly whispers as you back away towards the hallway. No, you shrug, but it’ll be really tricky for her to get it open–just imagining that image puts a smile on your sleepy face!Soup in hand, you march with purpose down the hall of bedrooms–noting that most of the doors appear to be closed.“Guess da’ others followed our example, huh?” Guess your bones. Good, you nod, they’re learning!With how quiet it is, you nearly drop your bowl to the floor when you find that you aren’t alone!“Put the claw away, Stan!” Tucker admonishes in a hushed tone! “You’re gonna wake her!”Whoops, you whisper, force of habit! Retracting your BONE CLAW, you follow Tucker’s finger over to Kiki’s small, peaceful form half-standing, half-slumped over a freshly-cleaned kitchen counter next to the oven. Is she, uh, is she okay?“We tried to help clean up,” Eddie explains, revealing himself leaning against the back wall, “but she did the, uh… the knife thing.”Both Eddie and Tucker’s eyes drift towards a particularly menacing-looking blade embedded in the wall not too far from your head. Oh.“You gonna eat that?” Eddie asks as he gestures to the bowl in your hands. “Just chuck it in the microwave–she won’t mind.”Chef Kiki gently snores as you make your way over to the microwave and shove your leftovers inside. Plugging in what you assume to be a decent amount of time, you lean against an empty space on the counter and turn your attention towards your three favorite looters!>CONTD.
>>5200089So, you grumble, still reeling from your fitful rest, what’ja miss anyways?“Soup, for one.” Tucker shrugs with a wry grin. “Then there was the pool incident-”“You missed out, Stan!” Eddie gushes excitedly! “Talbot was convinced there was a-oops!”Clasping two hands to his mouth, Ed pauses for a moment as Kiki stirs a bit on the counter. “He uh… he thought there was a secret passage leading up to that waterfall, right? We musta’ spent, like, twenty minutes yanking him out of the pool filter!” He continues in a much quieter tone.“After that everyone decided to hit the hay.” Tucker concludes. “Figured we’d need our strength for later.”A pleasant ‘DING!’ interrupts to tell you your food’s done! Removing the bowl from the microwave, you blow on the steaming grub a few times as Eddie dutifully hands you a fresh spoon. Thanks!“BONE appetit!” He replies with a smirk! Ew.“Anyways,” Tucker segues, giving Eddie a look of disapproval, “What’s the next step anyways? Not that I mind getting a little downtime.”“Yea!” Eddie adds, completely forgetting to be quiet AGAIN! “We gotta go underwater next, right? Wasn’t there still a SEA DEMON or something down there?”You’re working on it, okay? For now you just wanna have some damn soup! Bringing a spoonful to your lips, you take a hearty sip and smile with approval as the zesty mixture of broth, vegetables, and meat travels down your throat! DAMN, THAT’S GOOD!Watching Kiki lurch upright like an extra in an old zombie movie, you and the others freeze in terror for a few moments before she goes back to sleep. Close one!“Wanna take this to the living room?” Tucker asks, quietly pointing his finger in that direction. Sure, you shrug before leading the way over. Relocating to a few comfy chairs, you continue downing the soup as your pals slump into seats of their own.What’s the play here?>JUST ENJOY YOUR SOUP, DAMN IT!>HOW ARE THEY HOLDING UP, ANYWAYS?>HAVE THEY NOTICED ANYTHING WEIRD LATELY?>THEY STILL PLANNING ON MAKING A MOVIE OF ALL THIS CRAP?>WHAT DO THEY THINK YOU SHOULD DO NEXT?>THOUGHTS ON THE REST OF THE TEAM?>QUICKLY FINISH UP--YOU'VE GOT SHIT TO DO!>WRITE-IN!
>>5200092>>THEY STILL PLANNING ON MAKING A MOVIE OF ALL THIS CRAP?
>>5200092>THEY STILL PLANNING ON MAKING A MOVIE OF ALL THIS CRAP?
Tonight became real busy, all----spent most of today finding replacement furniture for the new pad and now I've got plans. Should have more SUNDAY AROUND 10-11AM PST! Sorry again for the slow pace--should pick up once we're more settled-in.
>>5200331>>5200360>>5200597>MOVIE TIE-INSurprise--guess who's still got an update left in him? Writing!
In between a few more spoonfuls of that CRAaAaAAZY SOUP, you can’t help but fixate on Eddie as he quietly retrieves that NOTEBOOK of his from his pocket and starts jotting down notes. GEEK ALERT!“Pretty sure he’s jottin’ down ideas, cupcake.” Ly explains. Hey, yea, you grunt, these jerks are FILM STUDENTS, aren’t they? Are they still planning on making a movie of this dumpster fire, or what?“Assuming we survive, yea!.” Tucker nods, eyes lighting up at the word ‘Movie’! “... Assuming, um, we still have your permission, of course.”“No sweat, Stan–” Eddie chimes in as he looks up from his mad scrawlings, “Everyone’s gonna want to hear the lowdown on what went down here–you leave it to us and we’ll all be the talk of the town–and the WORLD, maybe!”“The film world, that is.” Adds Tucker. “Which might as well be the whole world nowadays.”You can’t help but feel a little giddy at that–assuming these nutjobs can pull it off, that would be quite the boost to your street cred! Stanley Parble, you mutter to yourself with a glint in your eyes: international sweetheart and hero!… unless they screw up–then you’ll have to bust some heads! You give the two of them a warning snarl as you bring the bowl to your lips. How you manage to avoid choking is beyond you.>CONTD.
>>5200666“Don’t worry, with the way the screenplay’s going you’re gonna look great!” Eddie replies, waving your warning away with his pen-holding hand! “Still on the fence about including some of the finer details like your new pet and your, uh, ‘close call’ in the mines, but-”“Hold on, Ed–what did we say when we kicked this project off?” Tucker asks with a furrowed brow. With a befuddled look on his face, the budding screenwriter replies in a tone reminiscent of a student who doesn’t know an answer: “Err… don’t give away merch rights?”The director slaps his palm against his face. “... besides that.”“Um…” Eddie sheepishly mutters as he frantically glances between you and his roommate, “Oh! No creative liberties!”Tucker lets out a sigh of irritation. “... so why are you omitting crucial details?”“Because people want excitement, right?” Ed retorts in an increasingly defensive tone! “Anyone can film a friggin’ documentary, Tuck–we’re in a position to, y’know, add the good bits!”“Exactly!” Tucker snaps as his irritation grows to meet Eddie’s! “And if we focus too much on the wow factor, no one’s gonna believe it actually happened! Audiences want fidelity, damn it, not ACTION PORN!”“Since when did you become MOVIE GOD anyways!?” Snaps Eddie as he slams his notebook shut!“Since I was the goddamn DIRECTOR, bro!” Tucker growls, slamming a fist on his chair’s armrest! Okay, besides being their leader and all this might actually have an effect on your future fame, fortune, and assets–you might wanna step in here, is what you’re saying.Speaking of saying…>YOU LIKE EDDIE’S VERSION! YOU WANNA LOOK LIKE A GODDAMN SUPERSTAR!>TUCK’S RIGHT–YOU WANNA BE TRUE TO THE VIEWERS!>CAN YOU GUYS FLIRT ABOUT THIS LATER? IT’S CLEARLY PISSING YOU OFF!>YOU WERE HOPING IT COULD BE MORE AVANT GARDE, ACTUALLY.>THEY’RE FORGETTING THE MOST IMPORTANT DETAIL: ACTORS. WHO’S GONNA BE YOU?>JUST STAY QUIET AND ENJOY THE SHOW!>LEAVE QUIETLY-- THERE'S NO STOPPIN' THESE TWO WHEN THEY GET FIRED UP..>WRITE-IN!
>>5200667>COMPRISELet's tell them that the movie should have a believable amount of action whilst still looking hella cool-- something to the tune of that one movie 'DECEASE HEAVY.' That way both Tucker AND Eddie are satisfied.
>>5200667>CAN YOU GUYS FLIRT ABOUT THIS LATER? IT’S CLEARLY PISSING YOU OFF!
>>5200689>COMPROMISE!>>5200695>BUT FLIRT LATER, OKAY?Gonna clump these two together to keep things moving--apologies if this steps on anyone's toes! Writing!
And step in you do! Cutting them both off by noisily slurping up the remainder of your soup, you set the bowl aside and scowl at the film students-do they mind flirting about this later? It’s clearly pissing them both off! It sure as hell pissed YOU off listening to them howl like this!“Sorry, Stan,” Tucker apologizes in a somewhat taken aback tone, “But it’s important, you know? If we’re not on the same page from the get go, well-”“The whole thing will fall apart...” Eddie concludes, face scrunched up with displeasure. “But don’t worry–it’s not like we’re actually getting pissed at each other! It’s just part of the process, ya know?”You don’t, but you nod as if you do–gotta keep up appearances, after all! Anyways, you continue, steepling your fingers as you sink deeper into your comfy chair, why don’t they just, like, comprise on the whole thing? Do a little of both?“Err… compromise?” Tucker asks as he and Eddie exchange concerned glances. “I mean, that’s pretty much what we’re trying to do, Stan-”They just don’t get it, do they!? Shouting at each other about ‘audiences’ and ‘factors’ doesn’t get anyone anywhere! Feeling an idea train pick up speed in your head, you roll with it and add some dramatic hand gestures for emphasis! Just, like, add a believable amount of action that looks hella cool! You know, you shrug, like that DECEASE HEAVY flick! That one was based off a true story and it still kicked ass!“Stan,” Tucker begins in a measured tone, “DECEASE HEAVY wasn’t a true story-”Like hell it wasn’t! You heard about it yourself–couple years ago some terrorists took a whole Christmas Party hostage, but were taken down by one off-duty cop! Look it up!“I mean, it was a good movie,” Eddie adds, “but it wasn’t a true st-”Listen, you snarl, rapidly losing what little patience you had, you’ve been in the vents, okay? You’ve been there! That movie was 100% pawsible and they can’t convince you otherwise! Before either of them can get a word in, you deal a decisive blow to the argument:Anyways, you mutter, waving them away with your hand, just, like, do something along those lines. Boom–easy money!“Alright, Stan–” Tucker replies after taking a few moments to mull it over, “we’ll try to frame it like the, uh, award-winning documentary DECEASE HEAVY. Just for you.”“Yea!” Eddie says with an enthusiastic nod! “You’re gonna love it! Assuming, y’know, we live long enough to make it happen.”They’d better live long enough, you growl, appeased for the time being, because if they die before making this movie you’re gonna KILL ‘em!Both students give each other a fearful glance. That oughta’ sort things out, right Ly?“Gift of da’ silver tongue, cupcake.”>CONTD.
>>5201203Now that that’s settled, you segue as you sit up in your seat, what’s the story on the actors? Because you’ve got a few notes to discuss about who’s playing y-Before you can finish, you’re interrupted by a sudden burst of static from the RADIO CHRISTY GAVE YOU! Holding up a ‘one moment’ finger to Eddie and Tucker’s confused faces, you fish the gizmo out of your pockets and answer with a genial ‘y’ello-’https://youtu.be/tY_kfFnyoic“PARBLE!” Roars a voice you’ve heard way too many times today, “WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING RIGHT NOW!?”Tumbling over the side of the chair from the sheer volume of Security Chief Blumenkrantz’ voice, you answer him in a weak tone as you pick yourself off the ground. You’re uh, you mutter, just going over mission details. For missions!“Well put ‘em on hold!” Blumenkrantz snarls! “I was asked to keep you informed if any more disappearances happened, and guess what?GUESS!”Oh, uh, th-there’s been another disappearance?“A-Plus, Parble. A scouting team missed their scheduled check-in via radio. If they followed their damn patrol path, they most likely went dark around CALACA STREET!”“That’s where THE CROW’S NEST is, right?” Tucker asks, snapping his fingers in recognition! “The bar with the live music!”A disapproving hiss drifts through the radio’s receiver. “I have no clue what your cheerleader just said, Parble, but you’ve been unusually COMPETENT as of late, so when you’re done playing grab-ass I need you to head down there and check in on our security team!”How do you respond?>WHY DO I HAVE TO DO IT?>ANYTHING ELSE WORKING ON THIS?>YOU’LL HEAD OUT IN A BIT!>ANY CLUE WHAT WE’LL RUN INTO?>WRITE-IN!
>>5201208>>ANY CLUE WHAT WE’LL RUN INTO?
>>5201208>YOU’LL HEAD OUT IN A BIT!Break time is over, I suppose. I have a plan to catch these kidnappers, too. And it involves our two personal security goons.
>>5201520>>5201208Switching for convenience's sake!
>>5201208>YOU’LL HEAD OUT IN A BIT!
>>5201520>>5201592>>5201626>I'LL TAKE THE CASE!Golly, anon's got a plan! Writing!
No sweat, you reply, giving Tucker and Eddie an ‘I got this’ grin! You and the team will take care of it before he can say ‘BINGO!’“BINGO!” Snaps Blumenkrantz immediately afterwards, “You find those lazy bastard employees yet?”Er, you mutter through clenched teeth, not exact-“Then wasting my time and GET A MOVE ON!” Screams the Security Chief directly into your ear! Ow! “Oh, and one more thing, freak:” he continues as you struggle to listen through a still-ringing ear, “Whether you find them dead or alive, I want whoever’s responsible diced, you hear me? DICED!”You respond with a confused blink before remembering Blumenkrantz can’t see you… or can he? Tabling the unsettling thought for now, you instead ask if he’s sure about that. He’s not gonna punch you if you waste someone or something with vital intel, right?“You can do whatever the hell you want to them, Parble…” The Chief growls with even more gravel in his voice than usual! “Torture ‘em, talk to ‘em, hell, make the poor bastard a steak dinner if you feel like it–but whatever you do, you’re ending it by grinding ‘em into hamburger, got it?”No sweat, you nod, these meetings tend to end in bloodshed one way or another! He can count on you!“I damn well hope I can. Get it done, Parble.” And as suddenly as he called, Blumenkrantz’ voice goes silent. Giving your RADIO a brief look, you quietly stuff it back into your pockets and turn your attention back towards Eddie and Tucker.>CONTD.
>>5201982So, you continue, is there any way they could, like, have someone who looks a lot like you play you in the flick? Because you don’t really wanna learn all those lines, but you wouldn’t mind telling people that you played yourself-“Hold on, Stan,” Tucker interjects, “That call sounded kinda urgent, didn’t it? We should go.”“Yea,” Eddie nods as he stows his notebook back inside his pockets, “gotta strike while the iron’s hot, right?”You respond with your classic eyeroll. Okay, they need to take a chill pill here–whatever’s happening out there will still be around by the time you leave! “And we’re sure of that because…?” Tucker retorts, clearly not taking his prescribed chill pill. Because you know, okay? Look at those jerkass LIEUTENANTS you wasted–aside from GENERAL HAWKES, none of ‘em really got into doing their evil crap until you showed up! Coincidence? You don’t think so!“Stan, CLAYTON and the others were rounding up and killing survivors.” Eddie mutters in a contrite tone. “They, uh, they’ve been doing lots of bad things in our free time.”Granted, you shrug, but come on–this sidequest can wait, right? What about that GALA thing?“Dey’ got a point, kiddo.” Ly adds, earning a growl for his efforts. “Da’ sooner we head out, da’ more likely we find clues, right?” Your skeleton pauses. “Then again, if we ain’t ready for whatever’s snatchin’ people…”You’re the leader, alright? That means you’ll make the call! And that call is:>ROUND UP THE TROOPS! WE LEAVE NOW!>KEEP TALKING ABOUT THE MOVIE–THIS IS IMPORTANT!>TRACK DOWN DENISE FOR THOSE LISTENING BUGS!>CHAT WITH SOMEONE ELSE (WHO?)>HEAD TO THE BAZAAR–MAYBE SOMEONE WILL TAKE PEARLS?>SEE IF THE BUNKER'S QUARTERMASTER WILL HOOK YOU UP WITH MORE TOYS!>WRITE-IN!
That's all for tonight, folks--should be back on MONDAY AROUND 4-5PM PST! Thanks for playing and hope your week starts off strong... or at least not that miserable!
>>5201983>SEE IF THE BUNKER'S QUARTERMASTER WILL HOOK YOU UP WITH MORE TOYS!
>>5201983>ROUND UP THE TROOPS! WE LEAVE NOW!
>>5202004>>5202024>>5202290>>5202581>LOAD UP AN' LOAD OUT!>>5202235>LOAD OUT!Writing!
We WILL be ready! Because the CLEARWATER SANITATION COORDINATORS are about to LOAD UP!Both Eddie and Tucker respond to your rallying cry with looks of confusion laced with a pinch of pity.“We uh… I’m sorry–who?” Tucker asks, looking to Eddie for assistance and earning a shrug for his troubles. Did these maroons seriously forget your GANG NAME? Come on, now!“Oh, right!” Eddie sputters with a forced smile! “Err… any chance we could, uh, edit that name in the movie?”No, you respond flatly, there isn’t! Now go rouse the others, you continue as you rise to your feet, break time’s over!“You got it, boss.” Tucker salutes as Eddie leaps to his feet! “When are we leaving?”In a bit, you reply, you’ve got a RACCOON to wrangle, after all!Slowly turning your head towards the hallway leading to the bedrooms, your eyes lock with two glowing orbs watching you warily from around the corner!https://youtu.be/7wsTWT7tA7sROLL ME 1d100+5 TO WRANGLE A RACCOON WITHOUT GETTING TORN UP OR DESTROYING THE WHOLE PAD! I’LL TAKE THE BEST OF 3 ROLLS! Feel free to write in any specific strats!
Rolled 88 + 5 (1d100 + 5)>>5202896Time to wrangle a varmint.But this time let's just lure her out with something else delectable. It'll get old real quick if this raccoon is constantly avoiding us.
Rolled 49 + 5 (1d100 + 5)>>5202896
>>5202917A can of infinameat had oughta work again.
Rolled 59 + 5 (1d100 + 5)>>5202896
>>5202917>>5202918>>5202928>HIGHEST ROLL: 93!Writing!
“No.” Replies the masked guard behind the bulletproof window. Oh come on, you hiss through clenched teeth, seriously, Paul?!“Yep.” Shrugs the quartermaster from the safety of his stupid depot booth! “And it’s Paulo.”B-but, you stammer, glancing between him and your entourage waiting behind you, y-you brought the whole gang! And you need STUFF!“Well then that wasn’t a very smart idea, now was it?” Paulo asks as he taps away at a shipping console partially buried beneath a heap of forms, old coffee cups, and other similar debris. He helped you out before, though! Come on, be… be a PAL-O again!“Only did it before as a favor to Mitz.” He counters, sending a polite wave to the Rent-A-Cop in question as she barely glances up from her WATER POLO MONTHLY magazine. “Rules are rules.”“And bullshit is BULLSHIT!” Talbot roars as he stomps over and slams his fists on the counter next to you! “We’re risking our butts for you pen-pushers and you can’t even help!? Do we gotta fill out a FORM for you guys to act human, or somethin’!?”“I mean, I have a few here if you wanna get started on them.” Paolo grunts as he presses a handful of complex-looking documents against the glass.“That’s it. This booth’s goin’ bye-bye!” Talbot growls before being placed into a chokehold by Tucker!“Before T does something we all regret,” Tucker grunts, fighting to restrain the rabid janitor, “would someone please explain why we can’t requisition anything?”“Procurement Clause.” Art explains. “Boss told Stan that we can loot and keep whatever we find outside, but we have to leave company resources for, well, the company.”“Wait, really?” Eddie asks with wide eyes! “What the heck are we doing here, then?”“I was pondering that myself, actually.” Paolo replies, barely looking up from his console monitor. “If you’re done messing around, would you mind stepping aside? Got an actual customer waiting in line. Took a number from the machine and everything.”Following the quartermaster’s gaze, you find yourselves staring at a petite, but fully-armored SECURITY GOON waiting quietly behind your crowd next to a red ‘TAKE-A-NUMBER’ machine.“Err, t-take your time! Heheh…” She mutters, white-knuckling a small paper ticket in her trembling hands. “N-no, p-please,” Denise squeaks, suddenly reminding you that she exists, “Go ahead.. heheh…”“BEAT IT, TWERPS!” Talbot roars as he fights to escape Tucker’s hold! “Don’t think I forgot about what I owe ya’!”Watching both twerps recoil in fear, a part of you almost wants to let Talbot go… but your consciousness stops you. You don’t wanna get kicked out, after all!“Your capacity fer’ basic empathy is sterling as always, cupcake.”Thanks!>CONTD.
>>5203021“If I may, Stan,” Sybil interrupts, placing a light, pale hand on your shoulder,“Perhaps a more… diplomatic approach is the solution?”Well sure, you shrug, but you’ve also got a Talbot. And a Kiki. And a Raccoon! Gesturing to each in sequence, the pint-sized film student quietly pulls her FLAMETHROWER out of her pocket just enough to flash the grip as the latter looks in your direction with her head stuck in yet another CAN OF INFINAMEAT. “Yea…” Paolo begins with a few muffled clicks of his masked tongue, “You can’t bring that thing in here, by the way.”It was really tough getting this critter under control, you know! If you let it loose-“No it wasn’t.” Art murmurs. “In fact, it was pretty easy-”Yea, you hiss under your breath, but THEY don’t need to know that!“I don’t need to know anything.” Paolo sighs with increasing irritation in his voice. “What you need to know is that rules are rules–I can’t give you anything. So, like, ‘sorry’.”Steam builds up inside your face. H-he probably doesn’t even have anything, you spit! This is just one big act!“It really isn’t…” Replies the quartermaster as he lazily jerks his thumb in the direction of the backdoor to the warehouse behind him. “I mean, we’ve had supply chain issues, but.. y’know.”Your frustration grows as you feel your team’s eyes bore into your back. No, you whisper, you DON’T know! They’re right, of course–you could totally just raid a few shops on the way to that tip Blumenkrantz gave you, but this isn’t about supplies anymore–it’s about principles! You’re sure this jerk will crack somehow–the question is:How do you crack him?>APPEAL TO HIS NONEXISTENT HEART! YOU’RE TRYING TO SAVE PEOPLE!>MAKE A DEAL–HE HELPS YOU, YOU STOP THOSE SUPPLY ISSUES!>HAVE ANOTHER TEAMMATE DEAL WITH HIM! (WHO?)>HAVE ANOTHER TEAMMATE TRY TO SEDUCE HIM, OR SOMETHING! (WHO?)>THREATEN HIM WITH SOMETHING! (ITEM? RACCOON? WEAPON?)>HAVE LY POSSESS HIM!>GET SYB TO DO SOME MAGIC!>REGALE HIM WITH YOUR VALIANT DEEDS!>JUST LEAVE–IT AIN’T WORTH IT!>WRITE-IN!
>>5203025>>HAVE LY POSSESS HIM!I'm feeling confident...
That's all for tonight, folks--should be ready for more TUESDAY AROUND 3-4PM PST! Thanks as always for giving Bones Quest a shot and hope to see you again next time!
>>5203025>WRITE-IN!Threaten to radio Blumenkrantz. If he calls it a bluff, do it and tell the old man that the quartermaster is being a jerk and won't help us track down the kidnappers.
>>5203035I'll switch to this, but can Ly still do that in here with all that magical mumbo-jumbo?
>>5203502Just when I was about to switch to bluff… either way, we’re gonna roll for this I think. I mean, if we’re getting Ly possession as an option, then it certainly is possible in the bunker.
>>5203512Bones here! To clarify, you can definitely TRY to possess Paolo--Ly was able to possess that rat in the past and Syb blasted those rowdy security goons with ice. Just, uh, don't expect it to be as easy as the rat was. Consequences might be worse, too. Hope that helps! Seeya after work!
>>5203035>>5203502>LYPOSSESSION!Here goes something! ROLL ME 1d100-10 TO POSSESS PAOLO--I'LL TAKE THE BEST OF 3 ROLLS!
Rolled 50 - 10 (1d100 - 10)>>5203781
Rolled 12 - 10 (1d100 - 10)>>5203781
Rolled 37 - 50 (1d100 - 50)>>5203781You are now a skeleton. You may only spook and scare.
>>5203824I do not know why I put -50
>>5203829Pretty hardcore move there, though, not gonna lie.>>5203782>>5203788>>5203824>HIGHEST ROLL: 40! YEOWCH!Writing!
With the NUCLEAR option, duh! Why are you even wasting time with this power-tripping glorified convenience store clerk anyways? Clearing your throat to get everyone else to shut up, you slowly cross your arms as a confident grin slowly forms on your face. So, you begin, he’s not gonna give you anything, huh? The quartermaster matches you with crossed arms of his own as he glances between you and his terminal.“Not unless I see a pop-up on this screen in the next thr-nah, two seconds, that says “Hi, Paolo, this is the boss! I hereby authorize you to give the volatile raccoon girl whatever the hell her violent little head asks for!”You give it a few moments just in case, then proceed with Plan B when it’s clear there won’t be any miracle pop-ups.In that case, you shrug, perhaps he’ll feel a little different when your pal LY asks! When your layabout bones fail to pop out in their ASTRAL FORM, you cue him by clearing your throat a few times.“Whoops, my bad!” Ly hisses as he drifts out of your body and over to Paolo’s!“You can ask whoever the heck you want, kid,” He grunts, “I ain’t budging.”We’ll see about that, you coo with a malicious grin! Sensing your intent, Sybil snatches your shoulder again from behind!“Stan, DON’T!” She whispers in a curt tone, “what if-”You motion for her to be silent as your spectral skeleton wriggles into Paolo’s back like some kind of… bony… worm thing. If his target senses anything, he doesn’t react–guess Ly’s just getting better, huh?“Almost there…” Ly mutters as Paolo tries to discern what you’re so smug about. Just when he’s about to ask you outright, you feel a ‘click’ in your body as the rest of Ly merges with his target! BINGO!For a moment, all is silent. You and your pals stare down Paolo in a scene reminiscent of a Western Flick duel. Still fueled by confidence, you finally dare to raise an eyebrow. Well?“Well what?” Paolo responds with a stern voice. Well, uh… you mutter, frantically looking for some kind of sign from your calcium-rich comrade, weren’t-“You about to leave?” Paolo asks as he slowly cocks his head to the side. “Because I think we’re done here.”It takes you a moment to realize your head is cocked to the side as well...>CONTD.
>>5204095Ly, you hiss as you struggle to straighten your neck out, wh-what’s happening?!“What’s happening,” Paolo explains in an unsettlingly-calm voice, “Is that you and your friends are leaving, right?” NO, you think, you’re not done here!Yes, you reply in an equally measured tone, we’re leaving!“What?!” Talbot sputters, still held in Tucker’s vise-grip, “y-you’re not just going to walk away, right Stan?!”“Yea, Stanley,” Paolo replies as your facial muscles are forced into a genial grin, “Are you sure? You seemed pretty eager to stick around a minute ago.”Yes, you nod, you and your friends! Invisible puppet strings yank your arm upwards into an awkward thumb’s up. And you won’t be back, either!“Suit yourself.” The quartermaster replies, as the two of you share a noncommittal shrug. “Like I said, if you get permission from the boss-”Then you’ll be taken care of, you recite, face still stuck in a Cheshire grin! You want to protest-to fight! But something rooted in your head, your body, and your very soul tells you, no, COMPELS you, to LEAVE.So you do.By the time you wrestle control of your body back, you’re already buckled up in a seat in the back of THE VAN as it trundles down the bumpy road. Where… what happened, you ask as sensation returns to your extremities!“What happened,” Talbot huffs from the seat across from you, “is you bitched out, Stan.”“You did seem rather compelled to leave, yes.” Sybil nods, massaging your shoulder from the seat next to you. “Are you well?”Yea, you mutter through a lingering haze in your head, but… but that quartermaster-how did-“Shouldn’t have tried to strongarm him, boss.” Mitzi grunts from behind her magazine. “Pal’s a stickler for the rules, y’know.”“Not gonna lie,” Talbot adds with a look of disdain, “kinda CRINGE, Stan.”Oh come on, you snarl, seriously?! You didn’t see him help out back there!“I was getting CHOKED, okay!?” He fires back! “Tuck’s got, like, lunchbox hands!”“Didn’t help that you were struggling so hard.” Tucker mutters from the passenger seat up front. “You pretty much choked yourself out.”“Th-th-there’s a-always next t-time!” Denise hisses as she sits next to you! “I l-learned th-that in our Ch-Chess Nut d-days…heheh…”Sensing a stirring inside of your bones, you ask Ly how he’s doing and earn a dull ache in your head in response!“Eugh… yea, it’s gonna be a while before I try dat’ crap again…” He hisses in a labored voice. “Cripes, dat’ smarts…”>CONTD.
>>5204099Nursing your aching head, you turn towards the driver’s seat to ask Eddie where you’re headed.“CALACA STREET, right?” Eddie half-answers, half-asks! “Figured that’d be the best place to start.”Sure, you huff, if you want to get AMBUSHED! “Take it easy, Stan,” Art says in a placating tone, “We’ll stop just outside the area to form a better plan. No rushing this time, yea?”“And I’ll keep watch for any… unwanted guests.” Sybil adds as she closes her eyes and starts muttering incantations. “Great, you mutter as your fuzzy sister watches you from a half-eaten bag of chips in a nearby ZOOMMART CRATE. Oh good, at least she’s happy!“So what is the plan here anyways?” Mitzi asks as she stuffs her reading material back into her pocket. “Going door-to-door? Giant Mousetrap?”“Well,” Tucker replies, “The street itself is pretty long–might not be a bad idea to choose a landmark and go from there.”“Didn’t you mention that bar earlier?” Eddie asks as he swerves around the remains of a burnt-out ice cream truck. “’THE CLOWN’S NEST’ or whatever?”“’CROW’S NEST.’” Replies his roommate. “Nautical-themed. Pretty big in the local music scene, too.”“The one with the ship riggings, right?” Mitzi asks with growing interest. “I think my friend took me there once–barely remember it, so that’s a good thing, I guess?”“There’s also a PARK,” Tucker continues, “nothing huge, of course, but big enough to skulk around in.”You nod–if you’re gonna skulk, a park’s a good place to do it!When your remark earns a round of concerned glances from your gang, you quickly add a ‘in Blades of Zamarka!’“What the hell’s a Blade of Zama-”Anywhere else of interest,, you ask, deftly interrupting Talbot!“There’s the HAPPY HOUND DOG HOTEL,” adds Eddie’s copilot, “a grooming place and a kennel. Might be a good place to store missing people?”Just when you’re about to do the ole ‘Green Choices and a Write-In’ thing, Tucker’s face lights up as Kiki whispers something else in his ear. “Right, there’s also the old ART GALLERY! Haven’t been there in ages!”“The one with the weird sculpture out front, right?” Art asks with a snap of his fingers! “Yea–one of my art classes gave extra credit if we went there!”“You went?” Sybil asks with a raised eyebrow.“Nah…” Art shrugs, “I was, uh… too busy. Yea.”Sure, you scoff, playing WEEB GAMES, no doubt!Dodging the balled-up chip bag he chucks your way, you contemplate the best option:>SET SAIL FOR THE CROW’S NEST!>PARK AT THE PARK!>CHECK IN TO THE DOG HOTEL!>GET THAT EXTRA CREDIT! TO THE ART GALLERY!>YOU REMEMBER THERE BEING ANOTHER PLACE AROUND THERE… (WRITE-IN!)
Sorry, all, but today got really hectic for a variety of reasons--going to call it here for tonight and pick things up WEDNESDAY AROUND 4-5PM PST. Thanks for your patience and hope to see you next time!
>>5204101>>SET SAIL FOR THE CROW’S NEST!
>>5204101>CHECK IN TO THE DOG HOTEL!
Gonna let this sit a while longer, then roll a tiebreaker if nothing changes. Seeya in a bit!
>>5204101>CHECK IN TO THE DOG HOTEL!Have a feeling they won't show up in the same place as last time
>>5204204>SET SAIL!>>5204234>>5204932>CHECK IN!Writing! One more Tiebreaker Rejected!
DOG HOTEL,, you mutter with a snap of your fingers, gotta be!“Hell yea!” Eddie exclaims as he brings the van screeching around a street corner, “... er, why, though?”It’s a hotel, you explain, for DOGS. Who knows what they’ve been up to in there all this time? Your peers stare a bit, but no one dares to argue with your solid logic. The van is eerily silent for the rest of the ride, and before long you feel your ride roll to a slow stop.“Alright…” Eddie whispers for some indiscernible reason, “We’re here.”“No we’re not.” Tucker groans as he points his finger further down the lane, “It’s, like, three more intersections down.”“Whoops.” Mutters your driver sheepishly as he starts the van again. Coasting a few more blocks, your ride comes to a halt once more further down the road where you finally spot your target: a towering eyesore of a building with the words HAPPY HOUND spelled out on a busted faux-retro neon sign dangling from a bone-shaped facade!What really gets your attention, however, is the GOOD BOY SECURITY APC left deserted in the center of the road–its massive engine still rumbling with life!“Okay,” Art mutters as everyone stares from the safety of the van, “I’ll admit it does look pretty sketchy.”“Doesn’t matter what it looks like,” Talbot grunts as he makes to open the van’s doors, “so long as we kick the ass of whoever’s in there!”“Don’t you mean save?” Mitzi asks as she begrudgingly rises from her seat. “It’s a rescue mission, right?”“Yea,” Talbot shrugs, “but, like, if we have to kick someone’s butt, well…”“Let’s just focus on what we know for now, hm?” Sybil asks, prompting everyone to cool it. “I can definitely sense life in there, but I can’t discern who it belongs to without some concentration…” Settling down in her seat once more, several wisps of blue light dance around the back of the van as Syb does her thing.“So-”“SSSH!” Art hisses, promptly shutting Denise up! Moments later, The Goth’s voice reverberates throughout the vehicle with an unnatural echo:“Skeletons. Four of them. Two on the SECOND FLOOR, two on the FIRST.” She pauses. “and DOGS. At least SIX in the basement.”Dogs, huh? It’s not like you’re not a fan, of course, but that’s not really what you’re looking for, is it?“No,” Tucker frowns, “It’s not… Unless there’s a connection here somehow.”“The image here is blurry…” Sybil mutters. “Maybe it’s THE LICH’S power or the density of WILD MAGIC in the air… whatever it is, that’s what I saw."“Maybe we should check out the vehicle first?” Eddie suggests as he shoots an uncertain glance towards the APC. “Y’know… for clues?”How about we hide the van first, genius!?>CONTD.
>>5205072One awkward parking job and a few hunks of cardboard camouflage placed onto the van later, you and the gang quietly begin to formulate a plan.“So,” Art begins, “We’ve got the DOG HOTEL lead. Syb confirmed SKELETONS inside, but no sign of any kidnapees, right?”“Heh,” Talbot chuckles, “Kidnapees.”You can’t help but giggle too. Pee!“... anyways, if we go that route there’s gotta be a back entrance. Or the roof," he adds, clucking his tongue. "That’s probably an option.”“I’m still leaning towards the APC.” Eddie says with an obstinate shrug. “That’s where these guys were before they were taken, right? We should check that out first!”“Sure,” Tucker scoffs, “And fall right into a trap…”“He’s got a point.” Mitzi nods. “It’d be the bait I’d use.”Speaking of bait, you mutter, tapping your chin in thought, why even bother rushing in anywhere? Why not just bait these kidnappers out ourselves?“That’s the best idea I’ve heard all day!” Talbot smirks! “Let’s reel in these jerks with a trap of our own!”“B-b-bu-but d-don’t w-we need b-b-bait?” Denise stammers. “W-wh-who’s th-the unlucky w-winner, h-hm?”All eyes land on her for a moment, prompting another sea of sweat to rush forward from the dork.… followed by a chorus of ‘nah’s from the gang. Who the hell would want to kidnap HER, am I right, guys?! As everyone but Denise bursts into laughter, you take the time to weigh your options. If there really are kidnapees here, you’re gonna have to tread lightly–who knows what will happen to them if their captor feels threatened?What’s the plan?>THIS DOG HOTEL’S BAD JUJU–LET’S RELOCATE TO ONE OF THE OTHER PLACES (PARK, CROW’S NEST, ART GALLERY)>STORM THE DOG HOTEL! TAKE ‘EM BY SURPRISE!>INFILTRATE THE DOG HOTEL! SNEAKY IS SAFE!>LAY A TRAP OF YOUR OWN–YOU’VE GOT THE BAIT! (WHO?)>INVESTIGATE THE APC FIRST–MAYBE THERE ARE CLUES?>WRITE-IN!
Sorry, all, but gonna cut things short tonight too--today got really busy due to some apartment issues and I'm dog tired. Will resume THURSDAY AROUND 4-5PM PST-- hopefully with more than one update.Again, thanks so much for your patience--still figuring things out on my end.
>>5205075>LAY A TRAP OF YOUR OWN–YOU’VE GOT THE BAIT! (DOPPEL-STAN-GER)decoy time
>>5205075>LAY A TRAP OF YOUR OWN–YOU’VE GOT THE BAIT! (DOPPEL-STAN-GER)
>>5205079Mind elaborating a bit? Can't tell if you mean having Syb cast a spell on Stan, have someone look like her, or send the raccoon out.
>>5205075>LAY A TRAP OF YOUR OWN–YOU’VE GOT THE BAIT!if you ask me having a a member of good boy security check out the van shouldn't look too suspicious too the skeletons, that and I'm as confused as Bones about this DOPPEL-STAN-GER.That said having Ly check out the van is an option too
>>5205124guess I was a bit vague, more specifically I want us to use our DISTAL DECOY Bone-Us
>>5205075>LAY A TRAP OF YOUR OWN–YOU’VE GOT THE BAIT! (WHO?)Mitz and Art naturally. Who else would show up but a pair of goodboy goons to look for their coworkers. Have them slap their helmets on and go look around. If these folks like kidnapping goodboy security, then they're bound to go after them.
>>5205527Ah yes, the DECOY POWER! Yea, you still have a charge of that today--good thinking!
Home, but gonna leave this open a little longer now that the secret of the DOPPEL-STAN-GER has been revealed in case it sways anyone's choice!To review, you received a BONEUS from Clayton Black. Here's the description per Pastebin:>DISTAL DECOY: Two Stans? One’s bad enough! That’s what your enemies will be thinking when you pick this BONEUS! Once a day you can conjure up a DECOY in the spitting image of Stan using BONE FOG! It’ll do whatever you tell it to, but enough interference (AKA BULLETS, ATTACKS, STRONG WIND) will make it dissipate! Use wisely!
>>5205079>>5205113>>5205189>>5205545>LAY A TRAP!Bait is locked in! In the interest of DEMOCRACY, who/what will be the bait here? Place votes now! And plans, if you have specific ones!CHOOSE 1 OR MORE. ROLLS WILL BE REQUIRED PER WHO/HOW MANY ELEMENTS ARE IN PLAY!>MITZI>ART>DECOY STAN>OTHER TEAMMATE(S) (WHO?)>REMOTE-CONTROLLED DUCK!>STANLEY (RACCOON)>LY (INCORPOREAL SKELETON THING)>STAN (HUMAN, PROBABLY)>WRITE-IN
>>5205860>>5205873>DECOY STAN!Smoke and Mirrors it is! Now for the last bit of stalling: ROLL ME 1d100+5 TO MAKE SOME FRESH BAIT! I'LL TAKE THE BEST OF 3 ROLLS!Remember, though--you gotta tell the decoy WHAT TO DO! Otherwise it'll just stand still or run by like a jerk! Ouch!
Rolled 91 + 5 (1d100 + 5)>>5206014
Rolled 50 + 5 (1d100 + 5)>>5206014Sometimes I wish this board wasn’t so goddamn slow.
Feel free to roll again--wouldn't mind ending tonight on a vote rather than a roll!
Rolled 66 + 5 (1d100 + 5)>>5206014>>5206055Aye, aye.
>>5206021>>5206050>>5206061Obliged--writing the last update of the night!>HIGHEST ROLL: 96!
As you contemplate which teammate you wanna send to their potential, and most likely very painful death, a thought occurs–you got that one trick from CLAYTON, right? “The creepy doppelganger thing?” Art asks with a frown. “Yea, that might work.”It’ll work much better than Denise wearing his helmet, you reply with a shrug!“G-good j-joke… h-heheheeh…”Who’s laughing? Motioning for the gang to stand back, you quietly instruct them to keep their eyes on the area–there’s no telling what’s gonna happen when you pull this stunt! Taking a deep breath as the others spread out accordingly (while still remaining hidden, which looks kinda silly), you feel the air pressure change around you as tiny, gossamer bone particles drift from your body and slowly take the form of…“Hah, now there’s THREE of ‘em! Get it?!” Talbot jokes, earning an elbow to the gut! Zip it, dick! You’re doing a GHOST RUN, remember!?As you were narrating, the bone particles gather and take the form of your spitting, and dare you say spicy image. As your doppelganger gives you a toothy grin, the rest of the team watches in disbelief as it dutifully jogs off towards the APC! Finally emerging from her impromptu feast in the back of the van, LIL’ STANLEY watches ‘you’ depart with a look of complete and utter confusion on her fuzzy, crumb-flecked face! Hah! What a stupid animal!“Wow,” Mitzi mutters as she, Eddie, and Talbot watch a bit too intently, “Looks like the real thing, alright…”Yea, you snarl as your not-so-better half reaches the vehicle, now quit gawking and keep your eyes peeled! There’s no telling what-“THERE!”Following Art’s finger as it suddenly jabs forward, you just barely spot a flicker of movement from atop the building adjacent to the DOG HOTEL! W-what is it!?“No clue. Shut up.” Hisses the Rent-A-Cop as you and the others wait patiently. Is it a dog?!“I don’t know!”Okay, jeez–no need to get testy!>CONTD.
>>5206089“Give me a second…” Sybil murmurs as your doppelganger continues idling near the APC, “I can-”Too late! Watching the space pays off, but not much–just when you’re about to smack Art for seeing things, your mouth goes agape as a spidery appendage chucks a thin object off the roof towards your bait before retreating from the edge!“Is that…” Tucker hisses as you watch it lazily sail towards the street, “A PAPER AIRPLANE?”“Who CARES?!” Talbot growls once again in an overly-loud voice! “Whoever tossed it is gettin’ away! Let’s get after’ em!”“We can’t just run off, man!” Eddie counters as your doppelganger scratches its back, “Whatever it chucked is probably important!”“Just… just give me a second…” Sybil hisses through gritted teeth as she kneels on the ground! “I can almost see…”No time to bleed around the bush–you gotta ACT! What are YOU gonna do here!? HURRY!>HIGH-TAIL IT AFTER THE CHUCKER! (DO YOU BRING ANYONE ELSE?)>GET THE MESSAGE! (AGAIN, ANYONE WITH YOU?)>GUARD SYB WHILE SHE ZEROES IN ON THE INTRUDER!>LET SOMEONE ELSE MAKE A DECISION FOR A CHANGE–YOUR BACK HURTS!>WRITE-IN!
That's it for tonight--should be back around FRIDAY AROUND 4-5PM PST! Thanks for playing and seeya then, hopefully!
>>5206090>>GET THE MESSAGE! (AGAIN, ANYONE WITH YOU?)Talbot, since his whole skeleton is literally made of Goodboynium and we can use him as a meat-shield if need be. Also Eddie since he's decent with a gun.Have Art and Mitzi guard Syb in the meantime. Anyone else can be other lookout.
>>5206102I am okay with this.
>>5206102>>5206128>>5206337>DE PLANE! DE PLAAAAANE!Gonna post a short update now--will update more at the aforementioned time!
>>5206460No time for finesse here--gripping both Talbot and Eddie by the wrists, you pull them along as you scamper off to see what your doppelganger received! Art, Mitz, keep an eye on Syb, you bark, earning a quick nod from each in response! Everyone else better watch those damn buildings!Your pet watches with interest as you and your escorts snake through the maze of debris clogging the street towards the APC. Sensing your approach, your Doppelganger gives you an award-winning grin (in your opinion, at least) as the PAPER AIRPLANE sails straight through its eye! If any of the DOG HOTEL'S occupants or the MYSTERY THROWER notice, they don't mention anything. Not yet, anyways.ROLL 1d100+10 (DOPPELGANGER DISTRACTION AND BUNNY SUIT MINUS DRAGGING TWO OAFS) TO GET TO THE TRUCK SAFELY AND SNEAKILY! I'LL TAKE THE BEST OF 3 ROLLS!
Rolled 68 + 10 (1d100 + 10)>>5206467
Rolled 37 + 10 (1d100 + 10)>>5206467
Rolled 45 + 10 (1d100 + 10)>>5206467I know our janitor outfit is going to tear at some point and we're gonna be standing there in the leotard.
>>5206506>>5206525>>5206839>HIGHEST ROLL: 78!That'll do'er! Writing!
Some would say choosing the two loudest members of your team was foolish–that they’d give you away.Well, they’d be right... If you were SOMEONE ELSE BESIDES STANLEY-FUCKING-PARBLE, that is! The three of you move like ghosts through the twisted labyrinth of metal and concrete, pausing only briefly to check if the skeletons in the DOG HOTEL looming over you like some kind of Bone of Damocles.No bullets, no shouting, no surprise dice rolls. So far, so good. By the time you make it to the APC, your doppelganger is still waiting with a smile on her oh-so-cute face! “Kinda creepy, huh?” Talbot hisses as he pokes at your clone’s cheeks. “You can’t, like, feel any of what she’s feeling, right?”No, you growl, shoving his hand away from the decoy, you can’t, but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t PISS YOU OFF!“Found it!” Eddie interrupts as he holds up a delicately-folded PAPER AIRPLANE! Tossing it your way, the screenwriter immediately regrets his actions when the plane deftly avoids your attempts at grabbing it, and after a few awkward moments of trying to pick it up off the ground, the note eventually makes its way into your clutches.“Nice catch.” Talbot remarks as you unfold the paper.DUUUUH, NUHZ KUUUTCH! you snap in your best Talbot impression! Earning a quiet snicker from Eddie, you preemptively take a few steps behind the APC and out of your fellow Evening Sanitation Coordinator’s reach before reading the contents of the note:‘To the esteemed Stanley Parble,’“Esteemed?” Ly remarks. It’s called recognition, Ly, and it’s about damn time!‘I had hoped fate would bring us together, but time and tide, as they say, wait for no man. As such, I’ve been taking matters into my own hands. Now said matters, and their livelihoods, are in yours.’A chill runs down your spine as your pals and doppelganger watch with renewed interest.>CONTD.
>>5207122“Well?” Eddie asks, joining you behind the vehicle, “What’s it say?”‘Come to the GALLERY when you’ve read this message. ALONE and TRICK-FREE, please--this show is for VIPs only. Failure to obey will cost blood–though not yours or mine.’Just when you’re about to read the last paragraph, a handful of PHOTOGRAPHS tumble out of one of the airplane’s folds onto the ground. “Holy shit...” Talbot mutters as the color drains from Eddie’s face, “Is that-”Yep, you whisper as your blood turns to ice, you’d recognize that cap anywhere.Amidst a pile of photos depicting several GOOD BOY SECURITY GOONS sits a picture of your pal GUS– his stoic face covered in cuts and bruises!‘Please don’t delay,’ commands the note’s final finely-printed words, ‘it pays to be prompt–especially now.’As you look up from the note, something in your expression sets something off in Talbot. “What the HELL are we waiting for, huh!?” He growls as he looks at you expectantly, “Gus–where is he!?”Before you can respond, your plans are cut short by an ominous ticking noise from inside the APC…ROLL 1d100+5 FOR NO REASON IN PARTICULAR! I’LL TAKE THE BEST OF 3 ROLLS!
Rolled 17 + 5 (1d100 + 5)>>5207127
Rolled 81 + 5 (1d100 + 5)>>5207127
Rolled 79 + 5 (1d100 + 5)>>5207148>>5207127Rolling again. Cause I like rolls. That, and we already won.
>>5207138>>5207148>>5207277Works for me. >HIGHEST ROLL: 86!Writing!
It doesn’t matter how many days of pure, unadulterated CRAP you’ve had to wade through–the minute your ears pick up the sound of something ticking, you’re already pulling your pals by the arms with a curt “RUN!” Following a few seconds of visible confusion, both Eddie and Talbot follow you as fast as their non-magical leg bones can carry them once they hear the sound too!You’re just beginning to wonder if you overreacted when a blinding flash followed by a street-shaking BOOM rocks the APC! As the three of you collapse in a heap from the sudden explosion, you’re immediately showered by ash, metal, and several other unidentifiable chunks of debris. “GodDAMNIT!” Talbot groans as you turn to watch the security vehicle go up in flames, “What kind of psycho sends us a letter and then tries to KILL us, huh?!”“This guy, I guess!” Remarks Eddie as you spot movement from the team down the street. Before you can reconvene, the pavement around you explodes with the telltale signs of GUNFIRE! Man, you missed that… Not!“HEY, FLESHBAGS!” Roars what you assume to be one of the skeletons in the DOG HOTEL, “FUCK YOOOOOOOOOOOU!”“Cheeky PRICKS!” Roars your ex-bodyguard as a handful of metallic tentacles burst from his hand, “FUCK YOU TOO!”Picking up a nearby car husk, Talbot immediately gets to work chucking it at your new pals while Eddie tries out the REVOLVER you gave him! By the time you raise your BONE ARMOR and slide behind cover, the whole street is lit up by the firefight! Glancing towards where you left Syb and the others, you watch as Tucker and Kiki head for the back of the hotel while Art and Mitzi try to get a bead on your assailants while still covering Sybil.As for Denise, well, she’s somehow gotten pinned to the ground by LIL’ STANLEY. Seems like the critter wants some of her BEEF JERKY!It’s nothing they can’t handle… probably, but now that you think about it, whoever’s got Gus might not want to wait much longer.… and that GALLERY is just down the street…“Stan...” Ly begins in a wary tone, “What are we doin’?”>SUPPORTING TALBOT AND EDDIE, OF COURSE–YOU GUYS CAN BE THE DISTRACTION!>LINKING UP WITH ART, MITZ, AND SYB–THEY MIGHT NEED A FRESH EYE!>FOLLOWING KIKI AND TUCKER–YOU’RE FLANKING THESE PUNKS!>HELPING DENISE, YOU GUESS… UGH…>SLINKING OFF TOWARDS THE GALLERY–THESE GUYS CAN TRACK YOU DOWN LATER!>WRITE-IN!
>>5207343That's it for tonight, all--should have more TOMORROW AROUND 10-11AM PST! Thanks again for playing!
>>5207343>>SUPPORTING TALBOT AND EDDIE, OF COURSE–YOU GUYS CAN BE THE DISTRACTION!
>>5207343>SUPPORTING TALBOT AND EDDIE, OF COURSE–YOU GUYS CAN BE THE DISTRACTION!We and Talbot are the only ones who can take serious damage and stand a good chance of not being killed by it. It's why we always end up in the same roles.
>>5207343>SUPPORTING TALBOT AND EDDIE, OF COURSE–YOU GUYS CAN BE THE DISTRACTION!
>>5207370You do have that MARROW SERUM if you wanna give someone an extra 'boost'! Might have a few side effects, though...>>5207350>>5207370>>5207378>TEAM SMASH N' CRASH!ROLL ME 1d100+5 TO SHOW THESE BONEHEADS WHAT YOU'RE MADE OF! I'LL TAKE THE BEST OF 3 ROLLS!Also, please choose a method of destruction! Your choice and strats might impact the outcome!>ROCKET LAWNCHAIR!>EYE LASERS!>REGGINGTON BOLT-ACTION RIFLE!>CHINCHILL PUMP-ACTION SHOTGUN!>SOMETHING ELSE!
Rolled 88 + 5 (1d100 + 5)>>5207714>ROCKET LAWNCHAIR!
Rolled 83 + 5 (1d100 + 5)>>5207714>ROCKET LAWNCHAIR!
Feel free to roll again--been long enough and you've basically passed.
Rolled 90 + 5 (1d100 + 5)>>5207714inb4 critfail
>>5207942Darn! There's always next time, anon! :^)>>5207755>>5207763>>5207942>HIGHEST ROLL: 95!!!Writing!
Sensing you lingering, Talbot turns around after chucking his present at your foes with a sour look on his face–you know, the usual.“The hell you still doin’ here?!” He growls as a few stray bullets plink off of GOODBOYNIUM pooling over his skin.“No worries, Stan!” Eddie adds as he tries to fan his revolver’s hammer, “We’ve got this!”Watching Eddie’s shots go wide and Talbot struggle to pick up a trio of melted shopping carts, you get the feeling that no, they don’t got this.Speaking of things that you’ve got, you’ve got a ROCKET LAUNCHER, don’t you? And here you are not using it! Yanking the heavy artillery out of your pocket, you slot a fresh rocket into the shooty end and aim it at the windows where most of the bullets are coming from–easy as one, two, right?In a surprising act of self-preservation, the shooters above turn their attention from your pals and focus their fire on you!“Guess dat’ tankbuster’s got ‘em worried, huh?” Ly remarks as you steady your aim. Yep, now shut the Hell up, would’ja? A few shots ricochet harmlessly off of your armor as you release your breath and send the explosive party favor screaming towards your enemies! “FUCK YO-”The skeleton’s shout is cut off by a boom that shakes the whole hotel, but you have a feeling he wasn’t going to say anything important. As the building’s unbarricaded windows explode into a shower of glass, your eyes go wide as a chain reaction of small, but still loud explosions ring out across the hotel!“FUCK!” Roars what you assume to be one of the surviving gunmen as you watch the building shake under the stress, “THE AMMO-”The skeleton is cut off by a hail of bullets from within the building. Whoops, guess he didn’t make it, huh?Just when things start to quiet down, the front doors of the DOG HOTEL nearly collapse open as a skeleton in a dirt-covered leather jacket sprints through them with a look of abject terror on his face! Upon seeing the three of you, however, he freezes in place!“Aw CRAP!” He shouts as his hands move from his sides.What do!?>BLAST ‘EM!>TELL HIM TO SURRENDER, DAMN IT!>DISABLE HIM! (BONE CLAWS? MOP? SOMETHING ELSE?)>WRITE-IN!
>>5208042>TELL HIM TO SURRENDER, DAMN IT!would be good for us to interrogate him to get some info
That’s right, you hiss as you load another rocket into your weapon with a dangerous look in your eyes, CRAP! Speaking of, how about he explains just what the CRAP is going on here!“Be cool, man…” Eddie murmurs as he and Talbot choose targets on the skeleton, “my pals here are pretty unstable!”RUDE, you huff as you nudge him in the stomach with the back of your launcher.“Pretty sure he’s just tryin’ ta’ help, cupcake.” Ly whispers as the film student slowly recovers from your attack. Well he doesn’t have to be mean about it! “E-explain!?” The skeleton sputters, causing the loose chain wrapped around his jeans to rattle, “Th-there’s no TIME, man!”Before you can convince him to elaborate, preferably with violence, your pow-wow is interrupted by a chorus of heavy panting coming from the building…And paws. LOTS of paws.“Awww SHIT!” Spits the skelebiker as he stumbles away from the entrance, “th-they got out!”“Who did?!” Snaps Talbot as he trains his sidearm towards the source of the noise.“THEM!”Like a flood of fur they come: the bane of CLEARWATER’S Animal Control and Dog Catchers the world over–A PACK OF CLEARWATER’S FAMOUS WILD DOGS! Rushing towards you and the others amidst a fearsome discord of baying and howling, you can’t help but feel a little uneasy yourself–th-they aren’t gonna BITE you, are they?!“Dunno, but dat’ guy don’t seem to like ‘em much!” Ly remarks as the biker frantically climbs atop the smoking remains of the APC!What’s the plan!?>DRIVE THEM OFF! NOISE OUGHTA’ DO IT!>THIS IS GOOD MOTIVATION! GRAB THE SKELETON AND USE THE DOGS AS PRESSURE!>DISTRACT THE DOGS WITH FOOD! YOU MIGHT NEED A FEW THINGS, THOUGH!>OPEN FIRE–THESE THINGS CAN’T BE REASONED WITH!>WRITE-IN!
>>5208259>>THIS IS GOOD MOTIVATION! GRAB THE SKELETON AND USE THE DOGS AS PRESSURE!
>>5208259>THIS IS GOOD MOTIVATION! GRAB THE SKELETON AND USE THE DOGS AS PRESSURE!
>>5208259Gonna play games for a bit with pals--might be back later tonight, or might be back SUNDAY AROUND 10-11AM PST! Seeya in a bit, maybe!
>>5208377>>5208395>WHERE'S YOUR MOTIVATION?Writing! Think I can do another quick update!
Leaving so soon?! The biker’s bones are no match for yours when it comes to SPEED– by the time he’s clambered onto what he assumes to be safety, you’re already standing above him with a malicious grin on your face. Hey, does this look weird with your Doppelganger below?“Pretty sure it blew up, kid.” Ly answers as he points your head towards a smoldering pile of bone dust on the ground. A pity, you remark, watching your sister’s remains disperse into the warm apocalyptic wind. She lived a short life, but was bursting with spirit!As you reminisce on the few minutes you shared, you’re torn off of memory lane by a metal chain swinging at your head! Catching it in your BONE CLAWS, you rip the weapon from the biker’s trembling hands and chuck it away with a menacing chuckle! Thoroughly disarmed, the skeleton is helpless as you grab him by the lapels and growl in his face! What’s the matter? Not a dog person?!“Screw you, freak!” He snaps, spitting in your face as he goes! “Y-you an’ your boyfriends got lucky, is all! If those mangy mutts hadn’t broken free…”Oh right, you remark with mock surprise, them! With a toothy grin you let the biker slip a little closer to the hungry dogs below! … and then a little more. Jeez, this guy is heavy!“Yo,” Eddie says as he gives one of the dogs a few scratches behind the ears, “you need any help, Stan?”Yea, you nod as both he and Talbot join you atop the APC’s remains, would they mind handling the whole ‘dangling’ thing? You’re more of a ‘Choose every dialogue option’ person!“Heh, watch and learn!” Talbot snickers as he and Eddie each grab one of the biker’s arms! Held above the crazed canines, you can’t help but smirk as you start to see sweat dripping down the skeleton’s forehead. Yes, you think aloud, this will do just nicely...>CONTD.
>>5208971“Listen, fleshbags,” Sneers your captive, “if you’re gonna kill me, then kill me! Just do it quick, or-”“It’s fake bravado, Stan.” Talbot interjects, yanking the skeleton’s arm. “Can smell it a mile away.”“Fuck you, stringbean!” The skeleton snaps! “Women’s tracksuit wearin-”“It’s a MEN’S!” Roars Talbot as he nearly tugs the biker’s arm free of its socket! “SLEEK-FIT, jackass! For COMFORT!”Easy there Tiger, you say in a placating voice, you need him in one piece to answer questions-“Err, no we don’t.” Eddie says with a confused look on his face. “Remember that guy in CLAYTON’S gang? We kept his skull around and he was fine!”The biker doesn’t like the look you make when you remember. “O-Okay, fine–just keep those damn dogs away, yea?”You respond with a scowl–that depends on his manners! First and foremost, you begin, planting your hands on your hips, what’s his name anyways?“D-Donald!”The skeleton sputters as a particularly surly-looking lapdog leaps to nip at him! “B-but everyone calls me Donnie!”Okay, DONNIE, you hiss as you spot Art and Mitz watching from afar, here’s how the game works: you ask the questions–He answers! If you don’t like his response, T and E will start ripping pieces off! CAPRIS?!“Y-yea! Yea, sure!” He says in a panicked voice! Great, you smile, see? He can be nice!With the contents of the paper plane letter fresh in your mind, you know time is of the essence here–IN FACT, YOU MIGHT ONLY HAVE TIME TO ASK HIM TWO THINGS! The question is, what the hell do you ask?>WHAT WAS HE DOING IN A DOG HOTEL ANYWAYS?!>THE APC–WHAT HAPPENED TO THE PEOPLE INSIDE?>HE DOESN’T LOOK LIKE A GREASER–WHO’S HE RUNNING WITH? >SEEN ANYTHING OUT OF THE ORDINARY NEARBY LATELY?>WHAT’S HIS DEAL WITH DOGS, ANYWAYS?>WRITE-IN!
That's all for tonight, folks--seeya SUNDAY AROUND 10-11AM! Have some plans later in the day so we'll see what happens, but thanks again for playing!
>>5208973>WHAT WAS HE DOING IN A DOG HOTEL ANYWAYS?!>THE APC–WHAT HAPPENED TO THE PEOPLE INSIDE?>HE DOESN’T LOOK LIKE A GREASER–WHO’S HE RUNNING WITH?>SEEN ANYTHING OUT OF THE ORDINARY NEARBY LATELY?It's pretty obvious why he is scared of dogs, they're famous for liking bones
>>5208973>THE APC–WHAT HAPPENED TO THE PEOPLE INSIDE?>HE DOESN’T LOOK LIKE A GREASER–WHO’S HE RUNNING WITH?
>>5209002This. Obligatory seven update post. Thanks, Bones.
>>5209002>>5209014Read that last bit of the post in BLUE, you cheeky scoundrels, you. I've got your numbers this time!
>>5208973>>THE APC–WHAT HAPPENED TO THE PEOPLE INSIDE?>>HE DOESN’T LOOK LIKE A GREASER–WHO’S HE RUNNING WITH?
>>5209002>>5209013>>5209014>>5209035THE TALLY:>WHAT'S HE DOING IN A DOG HOTEL? 2>APC--WHAT HAPPENED? 4>WHO'S HE RUNNING WITH? 4>ANYTHING ODD LATELY? 2APC and who he's running with win it! Writing!
First thing’s first, you begin, poking an accusatory finger into the skeleton’s chest, this vehicle–what happened to it!?“... they uh… left their lights on?” The biker asks flippantly. Oh that does it! Snapping your fingers, Eddie and Talbot harness their inner goon and let the biker drop into DOG SLOBBER RANGE before deftly yanking him away just as the large, brown dog goes for a chomp! Second chance, punk!“Aw SHIT! Okay, okay–those paramilitary assholes were rolling by a few blocks away, right? Harris saw ‘em and thought it’d be a good deal if we ambushed ‘em and jacked their stuff!”Your eyes narrow. Harris, you hiss, who is he?“One of my buddies you blew up!” The biker spits! “The hell does it matter now?”“Erm, sorry about your friend…” Eddie mutters, earning a pair of frowns from both you and Talbot.“Don’t be,” Donnie grunts, “Prick was an asshole when we were alive, too.”Anyways, you say, indicating with your hand to move on, why didn’t they, like, hide this thing once they stole it? “Yea!” Eddie scowls in assent, “Or turn off the engine? Think of all the pollution! It’s Earth Day every day now!”“Oh, don’t buy into that crap!” Talbot growls as the skeleton hangs a little looser from both of their grasps, “All that smog goes into the sky and keeps us hidden from the ALIENS– that ‘pollution’ angle? Follow the money trail and see what you find!”You raise an eyebrow. Is this because he burned down an entire Redwood Preserve trying to kill you earlier? The janitor scoffs, clearly insulted.“Sure! And I’d do it again!”“I uh… should I keep talking?” Donny asks as one of the dogs below lets out an impatient ‘boof!’ Yea, you snarl, you never told him to stop!“Alright–truth is we never got the chance to ambush ‘em,” he explains, “Halfway through gettin’ a barricade set up, we heard a set of big wheels rolling up outside–turns out the guys we were scouting made it over early!”Okay, you nod, but why?“I was gettin’ to that!” Donnie spits! “By the time me an’ the guys were peekin’ through the windows, those soldiers were already hopping out of the vehicle–almost like they were chasin’ someone, you know?”“You think they saw something, Stan?” Eddie asks, gently pushing a dog off the side of the burned-out APC with his sneaker. You don’t think anything yet, you hiss, earning a quiet chuckle from Talbot. You said 'think anything YET', ASS!>CONTD.
>>5209391“They sure as hell looked like they saw something.” Continues the skeleton. “They took off almost immediately–got into pairs and each chose a direction!”“So what happened next?” Eddie asks, eyes growing wider with interest!“It was like a movie, man!” Donnie hisses! “We heard chatter over radios or something, right? Then the soldiers came back, only some of them were missing! Then they must have heard someone, because all of ‘em ran down that alley over there after!” He adds, jabbing his finger towards an alleyway squeezed between the DOG HOTEL and some kind of PEST CONTROL place. “We heard a few gunshots, but that was it–everything went quiet after that.”“And you didn’t even check it out?!” Talbot scoffs, clearly unimpressed, “Lame, man.”“Hey, you weren’t there, asshole!” Donnie fires back, earning another dip towards the dogs! “AGH! Th-the whole thing was over in a few minutes–you really think we wanted to tangle with whatever got that squad?”You shrug. They tangled with you!“Yea, well…” The skeleton mutters, “we uh… we were busy, okay? Setting shit up.”Yea, you laugh, busy being WUSSES!“So what about the BOMB?” Eddie asks, pointing to the burned-out husk you’re currently standing on. “That wasn’t you guys, right?”“I’ll admit it: not a bad idea.” Donnie shrugs. “Not ours, though. Something else put it there once the shooting stopped.”You frown. Something?“Sure didn’t look human to me!” Donnie replies with a wild look in his eye sockets! “Whatever it was was wrapped up in rags or something–had a real funny way of walking, too.” Good start, you growl, but you need more! What else did he see?“It moved pretty quickly and quietly for, well, whatever it was…” The biker continues, straining his brain for more details. “Like a spider or something. It was BIG, too! Real big!”“Any ideas?” Eddie asks, face scrunched up in confusion, “I’m drawin’ a blank here.”“Here’s an idea:” Donnie interjects, “let me go? I told you all I know!”All in good time, you hiss as you trace the path from the APC to the shady alley. All in good time…>CONTD.
>>5209392Before you, heh, let him go, you’ve got another question bugging you–what’s his theme, anyways?“... what the fuck are you talking about, freak?”The THEME, dang it! You already iced, like, every LIEUTENANT on land–is he a GREASER? a SOLDIER? What’s the deal!?“Greaser? Lieutenants?! What a-” Donnie’s question dies in his nonexistent throat as something resembling a realization hits him. “Oh… oh no--you’re that STANLEY chick, aren’t you?”He’s goddamn right, you reply with a Cheshire Grin! Leader of the CLEARWATER SANITATION COORDINATORS, SAVIOR OF HUMANITY, QUEST PROTAGONIST, AND SEMIFINALIST IN THAT WAIFU TOURNEY THING! Check the archives!“W-wha?” Oh, right, you mutter apologetically, and the defeater of, like, every one of TIM’S cheer squad. Not to mention TERRY THE TERRIBLE!“ROLY RHIT!” The dogs growl in unison! Ha ha–they’re trying to make people words!“L-look, kid, y-you’re not gonna take my MARROW, are ya?”You shrug–you haven’t decided yet.“A-a-and feed it to y-y-yer DEMON RACCOON BABIES, are ya?!”“E-er, no,” Eddie interjects, gently pushing the business end of yourROCKET LAUNCHER away from the skeleton’s face, “But you might want to answer her question…”“Sure!” Donnie sputters, “I’ll tell ya’ everything! Me an’ the guys just woke up a few days ago, alright?! At the cemetery on Bullard Street!”Hey, you know that one–Syb used to do those annoying poetry readings there all the time before her podcast!“Me an’ the guys used to get into trouble around here back in the day, so when we woke up and felt this urge to, y’know, kill an’ pillage, we kinda just went with it!”“Understandable.” Talbot says, nodding thoughtfully. Not helping, moron!“Hey, you don’t know how tough it’s been!” Donnie snaps! “Doesn’t matter now, though–THE VOICE keeps talking about the GRAND FINALE--hope I’m around to see it happen!”What voice, pray tell, is he talking about? TIM’S?“Tim? Dunno, but it likes telling us what to do.” The skeleton explains. “Gets real happy when we break and kill stuff, too.”“Sounds like TIM alright…” Ly muses. “You think dis’ is goin’ accordin’ to plan, though?”No clue, you shrug, but it doesn’t really matter what he thinks–you’re stopping his bony ass!“So,” Donnie begins, “You uh… you mind freeing me? You won’t see me again, that’s for damn sure!”What say thee?>WHAT WAS HE DOING IN A DOG HOTEL ANYWAYS?!>SEEN ANYTHING OUT OF THE ORDINARY NEARBY LATELY?>WHAT’S HIS DEAL WITH DOGS, ANYWAYS?>KILL ‘EM! (HOW?)>FREE ‘EM! >WRITE-IN!
>>5209395>>SEEN ANYTHING OUT OF THE ORDINARY NEARBY LATELY?>WHAT WAS HE DOING IN A DOG HOTEL ANYWAYS?!>FREE HIMDoesn’t seem like this guy is much harm. Let’s threaten him enough so when we free him it seems like an act of mercy— wouldn’t want the other skeletons to think we’re going soft!
>>5209395>FREE ‘EM! >SEEN ANYTHING OUT OF THE ORDINARY?I say we ask him one last question and get the hell out of here. Time's a burnin'. We've got some robed reapers to hunt down.
>>5209395I'll change to this for convenience's sake. >>5209577
No need to rush or switch votes--some plans I thought would happen later got pushed to NOW, so unfortunately I'm not gonna be able to update until later on this evening or MONDAY AROUND 4-5PM PST at the latest. Sorry about the sudden disappearance!
>>5209577>>5209583>>5209609>>5210024THE TALLY:>ANYTHING OUT OF THE ORDINARY? 4>WHAT'S WITH THE DOG HOTEL? 1>FREE!Writing! Sorry about the lateness--was delivering some food to a friend.
Just one more thing, you reply as you tap your chin in thought, he and his ‘boys’ see anything out of the ordinary around here lately?Donnie responds with an incredulous look. “You uh… you look out the window lately, freak?”Yes, yes, you groan, things have gotten pretty lively lately, but that’s besides the point! You’re talking about ESPECIALLY weird stuff, okay?! Like… you dunno… LEADS?“LEADS?” Echoes the skeleton as your two goons get ready to drop his ass, “You probably know more than I do, kid–we only blew through here and trapped those damn MUTTS about a day ago!”You frown. Oh well! Drop hi-“NoNONOnuhNO!” Donnie screams as the pack beneath him grows restless, “Just… just let me think, okay?!” As Eddie and Talbot dangle him above certain doom, the skeleton rapidly rattles off tidbits of info:“Been a lot less of us around lately–guessing that’s your doing, huh? Last group we talked with was a squad of soldiers heading for that MUSEUM– said somethin’ about resupplying? Said they’d stop by if they found some extra weapons, but they never came back–selfish pricks!”“That museum’s pretty popular all of a sudden, huh?” Eddie remarks as he looks your way. “Didn’t that SEA WITCH’S goons stop by there a while ago too?”“What’s so special about it anyways?” Talbot groans, “They don’t even have that many dinosaurs there…”“Search me.” Donnie shrugs. “Won’t catch me going there, that’s for damn sure.”Great, you huff, now does he mind telling you something you DON’T know?“Right, right, sorry! Oh yea,” The skeleton continues with wide eye sockets, “been hearin’ a lot of odd noises at night lately. Nothin’ big, mind, but still.”Where?“Down there.” Donnie answers as he points a finger towards the SEWER MANHOLE a few feet away. “Not a bad way to get around if you don’t mind smellin’ like shit.”Yea, you shiver, you’re uh… you’re good.“And still smell like cinnamon.” Talbot observes. “Man, girl’s deodorant is somethin’ else.”He has no idea…>CONTD.
>>5210903“Oh right!” Donnie sputters with surprise, “The GALLERY!”The Gallery?“Yea!” He nods as if it might just save his life, “The boys and I scouted around every now and then, right? Get this: we were checking out the gallery the other day–y’know, to see if we could nab anything pricey? You nod–it’s definitely what you would do!“Right! We were already weighed down from another raid, though, so we planned to check it out later. Only when we offloaded our loot an’ headed back out, the whole place was locked down!”Well DUH, you sneer, it’s a GALLERY!“You think I don’t know that!?” Spits the skeleton! “I mean it was locked down even more, alright? We came back and found the whole place fitted with chains, new locks, hell, there was even some sort of funny smell around the whole place!”“So…” Eddie asks, “did you guys break in?”“Hell no!” Donnie shouts! “There was something off about that place! Haven’t been back since.”Huh, you mutter to yourself, well that sounds peachy!“Hey, you wanted out of the ordinary, you got out of the ordinary.” The skeleton shrugs. “And that, uh, that happens to be all I got, so…” He looks at you with a sheepish grin, “How about letting me go now?”Mulling over all of the new info, you let the biker stew for a bit before giving your answer: you’ll give him a running start… after that, well…“W-well?” The skeleton stammers as Talbot and Eddie help him to his feet.You respond with a shrug–that part’s on him! Turning your attention to the dogs, you whip out your CHINCHILL PUMP-ACTION and aim it in the air! Scram, mutts!Though the WILD DOGS OF CLEARWATER are no strangers to gunshots, these ones scatter quickly once you fire a few salvos of buckshot into the air! Retreating to safety behind a car, you motion for Eddie and Talbot to give the prisoner a ‘boost’!Kicking him off the burned-out APC, your pals watch with menacing glee as the skeleton swiftly picks himself off and rushes towards the park! “I-I WON’T FORGET THISSS!” He shouts as the dogs get over their fears! As the baying pack disappears after the skeleton down the street, you give your goons an appreciative nod–not bad, guys!“Thanks!” Eddie grins, “Not every day I get to play The Muscle!”“It gets easier with practice.” Talbot shrugs. “So what’s next, anyways?”What IS next?>CHECK OUT THE DOG HOTEL–THERE MIGHT BE SOMETHING OF USE!>HEAD TO THE PARK–IT’S NOT THAT FAR!>GO TO THE GALLERY FRONT ENTRANCE–SOMEONE’S EXPECTING YOU!>SCOPE OUT THE BACK OF THE GALLERY–JUST TO BE SAFE!>H-HAVE SOMEONE CHECK THE S-SEWERS...>ASK SOMEONE FOR ADVICE (WHO?)>WRITE-IN!
Sorry, all, but this one was a friggin' slog to write for some reason--creative goo just ain't flowing tonight. I'll try again TUESDAY AROUND 4-5PM PST, but right now it's just feeling forced. Sorry for the wait--hopefully tomorrow will be a little better.
>>5210906>>GO TO THE GALLERY FRONT ENTRANCE–SOMEONE’S EXPECTING YOU!
>>5210906>GO TO THE GALLERY FRONT ENTRANCE–SOMEONE’S EXPECTING YOU!If we have to go inside alone, tell the gang that if we die, Lil' Stanley is in charge. And Sybil has to eat our bones to prevent the power from returning to the Lich.
>>5210906>GO TO THE GALLERY FRONT ENTRANCE–SOMEONE’S EXPECTING YOU!
>>5211729What’s next, you answer as you lead your goons back over to the van, is that you’ve got a date… at the GALLERY!“What’s this about a date?” Mitzi asks with a perplexed look on her face. You respond by passing the note around to the rest of the group, save for Denise who’s still busy trying to stop LIL’ STANLEY from gnawing her hair. Hopeless.“You know this is a trap, right?” Art asks as he hands you back your ex-paper airplane. “Because in case you didn’t catch it: THIS IS A TRAP.”Yea, you shrug, but if whoever chucked this plane does have Gus, you’d rather not take any chances. Not yet, at least!“Take what chances?” Tucker asks as he and Kiki emerge from the DOG HOTEL carrying a pair of bags and a HUNTING RIFLE OF SOME SORT. Hold on, you counter, what the heck is that?!“TRANQUILIZER RIFLE.” Tucker answers as Kiki holds out a nasty-looking dart for the group to see. “Found it in a case–was one of the only things that didn’t get blown to bits in there.”You can’t help but scoff a bit–uh, Earth to Tucker: you can’t trankinize SKELETONS! “Well yea,” He shrugs, “but Keek figured it’d be useful against, y’know, other stuff.”Seeing her cue, Kiki mimics firing a dart at your pet who responds with a disapproving hiss. You’re not getting rid of Stanley, alright!? And that’s FINAL!“Yea!” Art agrees in a surprising act of supportiveness, “Do you really want to separate Stan from her long-lost sister? That’s cruel.”Ha-ha, you growl, flipping the bird his way. “Well anyways, we found a bunch of PAINKILLERS too.” Tucker adds as he tosses a bottle of pills your way. “We’ll keep the rest in the VAN.”Stowing your meds in your pocket, you give the two film students an impatient stare–can you PLEASE finish what you were saying now?“Sure!” Tucker nods as a sheepish grin forms on Kiki’s face, “What’d we miss?”>CONTD.
>>5211757“Oh.” Tucker says as you finish passing around the paper airplane. AGAIN. “You know it’s a trap, right?”YES, you snarl, but sometimes life throws, like, lemons at you and you have to weather the storm, or something! They get it, right? You have to go!“That’s honestly one of the most coherent expressions you’ve ever come up with.” Art replies. “Still–do we really want to play ball with whoever this is? Seems like a good way to get you where they want you.”“She won’t be alone.” Sybil frowns. “Well… not entirely.”“Goin’ with the doll trick again, huh?” Mitzi asks with a bemused look on her face. “Haven’t seen that one since the prison break!”“It’s her call.” Sybil shrugs. “To be completely honest it might be safer to assist Stanley from the outside--she can’t be blamed if her friends come to her need after she runs off, now can she?”“I dunno…” Talbot grunts, crossing his arms in displeasure. “Why aren’t we just kicking the damn doors down? Whoever this sicko is can’t do anything if we just barrel through ‘em, right?”“Depends on who or what we’re dealing with.” Tucker replies with a similar conflicted expression. “Given what we’ve seen in the past few days there’s no telling what Stan’s gonna run into.”Who the heck cares?! You’re going, alright? And you’re doing it now! Taking a few strides towards the direction you’re pretty sure THE GALLERY is in, you pause to look dramatically over your shoulder. If you don’t come back, you add in a solemn voice, LIL’ STANLEY is in charge–no arguing! ART?!“I’m not even gonna respond to that.” Sniffs the Rent-A-Cop as your raccoon shoots him a smug grin. He just did! Also, you continue, Sybil has permission to eat your bones. For, like, power, or whatever. You pause. She uh, might want to borrow your ABS to cut into ‘em.“Don’t be stupid, Stan.” Sybil says shaking her head, “I’ll just butcher you with a RADIANT BLADE. Err–if I HAVE to, that is!”Great, you nod, guess everyone’s got things figured out! Resuming what might be your death march, the theatrics are put on hold by your Goth pal shouting for you to stop!“Stan!” She repeats, “The GLAMOUR spell! You don’t even need to walk in–not, well, you, at least!”“Yeah!” Mitzi nods, “Let us handle things for once!”“Famous last words…” Ly remarks as you mull over Sybil’s idea in your head. When you open your mouth again, you ultimately decide to:>GO BY YOURSELF. THE OTHERS CAN BURST IN TO SAVE THE DAY INDEPENDENTLY!>GO BY YOURSELF, BUT HAVE SOMEONE SHADOW YOU! (WHO?)>GO WITH THE SYB DOLL! YOU CAN USE A LITTLE MAGIC!>GLAMOUR SOMEONE! THEY CAN PRETEND TO BE YOU! (WHO BESIDES SYBIL?)>SCREW IT–LET’S JUST STORM THE DAMN PLACE!>WRITE-IN!
>>5211758>GO BY YOURSELF, BUT HAVE SOMEONE SHADOW YOU! (MITZI)
>>5211758>>GO BY YOURSELF, BUT HAVE SOMEONE SHADOW YOU! (MITZI)
>>5211904>>5211976>MEETUP + MITZ!Writing!
Nuh-uh, you finally reply with a shake of your head, this is something you have to handle alone… especially if Gus’ life is on the line!“Still-”BUT, you continue, countering Sybil’s interruption with one of your own along with a swift finger to her black-painted lips, if someone were to, I dunno, sneak in at the same time, well… what could you do?It takes a few winks and wiggling eyebrows before your crew gets the picture.“It’s a long shot,” Art mutters as he thoughtfully rubs his scruffy chin, “but it might just work… if you pick the right person, that is.”“Okay, OKAY...” Talbot sighs as he pushes off of the wall he was resting on, “I’ll do it! But you’re gonna owe me big time for this-”Wha? No, moron, you were gonna go with MITZ! Talbot takes the news about as gracefully as you’d expect.“WHA?! HER?!” He shouts in an incredulous tone! “WHY?!”“Because,” Mitzi intervenes with a smug grin on her face, “Stan needs someone nimble and quiet–not someone who still trips over their shoelaces. Someone like moi.” She explains, with a hand flourish.“I’ll trip over YOUR shoelaces, you smug-” Before Talbot can act on whatever he’s threatening to do, something catches at his feet and sends the not-so-gentle giant toppling to the pavement like a very angry felled tree!“So!” Mitzi continues, clapping the nonexistent dirt from her gloved hands, “now that that’s settled, shall we get going?” The tomboy pauses with a faux-surprised look on her face. “Whoops, I mean… why don’t you get going?”“Just be careful, alright?” Art pleads as Talbot struggles to untie his tied together shoelaces, “Who knows what’ll happen if this paper-chucker catches wind of-”“You worry too much, Artie!” Mitzi says with a wry grin! “And don’t worry, Stan–I’ll be keeping an eye on ya’!” The girl shoots you a wink before putting her helmet on. “Strictly business, of course!”“Don’t worry, Stan–we’ll be nearby if you need us!” Eddie adds as you and Mitzi head off down the road. Hopefully that won’t be necessary!>CONTD.
You don’t have to walk long before you see it–a collection of jagged, almost alien metal fingers reach skyward out of a massive building resembling the shell of some kind of tortoise cyborg!“Yow,” Ly remarks as the reflection from the blood-red sun makes you wince, “Dat’s uh… dat’s a bit too artistic for me, kid.”This right here, you mutter, shaking your head in disapproval, this is the kind of stuff ART BITCHES find ‘Event Gourd’ or whatever! For all you know the toilets could be fishbowls filled with fertilizer or some weird crap like that! Disgusting!“Perfect place ta’ hold someone against their will, huh?” Ly remarks as you begrudgingly continue towards the towering double doors at the front entrance. “Don’t look easy ta’ break in, either–does dat’ eyesore even have windows?”Not your problem, you shrug, not that you see any on the building’s non-Euclidean exterior. Speaking of, you continue, you might wanna head out, Mitz–there’s no telling who’s watchi-It takes you a moment to realize that you’re completely alone. Huh.“Guess she’s pretty good at dat’ when she ain’t lazin’ around…” Ly muses as you look around for your backup! Scanning the streets, it takes you a moment to feel a slip of paper in your pocket–fishing it out, you find yourself looking at a fresh note written in surprisingly girly handwriting:‘Whistle if ya’ need me! Won’t let ya’ down. <3~Mitz’Well, you mutter, stuffing the note into your pocket, guess that settles that, huh?Little did you know that it was JUST THE BEGINNING! OoOOOoooOH!DECISION TIME! WHOSE PERSPECTIVE DO YOU FOLLOW?>STAN’S!>MITZI’S!
Getting tired on this end, so I'm gonna call it quits for tonight! Will pick things up again WEDNESDAY AROUND 4-5PM PST! Have some dinner plans later that night, but we'll try to get a few updates in before that happens. As always, thanks again for playing and hope to see you next time!
Shit, just realized that I didn't really give anyone a chance to plan or talk to Mitzi before having her pull the Batman trick on you--feel free to write in anything you wanna give to her or order her to do and I'll fanagle it in the next update, kay? Sorry about that!
>>5212130>MITZI’S!Why not. Gives Bones a change of pace and spices things up a little. Unless everyone else wants to stick to Stan.
>>5212191>>5212209>>5212379>>5212868>MITZ TIME FOR A CHANGE!Writing!
>>5213038Your minty breath warms the inside of your mask and stings your eyes as you survey your target from inside a burnt-out van. Your name is MITZI MULDOON--not that you had any trouble remembering, and all circumstances aside, it's nice to get a chance to stretch your legs a little bit. While roaming with Stan's pack has been fun and downright therapeutic at times compared to your desk job, it's hard to work your magic when tromping around like a herd of drunken elephants all the time.THE GALLERY sticks out of the street like an exceptionally sore, metallic thumb--so much so that you can't help but be a little impressed. If the sun caught the right angle on this thing, it'd probably fry half the block! Taking a moment to smile at that particular mental image, you refocus yourself when you spot Stanley approaching the monument to bad design as if she was about to knock on the front door and sell the tenants cookies.That's her, alright.You let your vision linger on her for a moment before returning to business--she picked you to take care of it, after all! Surveying the building with a PAIR OF 'NOCS you had in your kit, you quickly take note of any possible entrances... and complications.No guards. Outside, at least. The few windows THE GALLERY has are boarded up on the outside--that oughta' make getting in a little easier. You pause. Odd that Stan would choose you for this kind of thing--She usually goes for her BFF Syb and Talbot, whatever the hell's going on there... After that tends to be Artie and Eddie, the poor guy. Not that you've been keeping track, or anything.There's a loading dock around the back--a few trailers too. Not great, you sigh, but not terrible either--at least you'll have a little cover on the way in. Upon closer inspection you notice a fresh padlock hanging loosely on a chain around the handle of a heavy fire door--sheesh, DURALOCK? Sloppy, you think, unless someone WANTS intruders...You probably told her you were sneaky in passing, you reason as you bring your binoculars towards the front. That or she noticed you working your magic earlier. You smile. Damn right she notices you. Still, though, you think as you watch the girl in question scale the steps leading to the front entrance, how'd she know you did so well in the COVERT stuff in training?Christ, you only tried so hard because the top scorer got DONUTS-- Whodathunk all that practice avoiding work would finally pay off?>CONTD.
>>5213054Anyways, by the time Stan makes it to the front door, it's already swinging open. She recoils a bit before realizing it's electronic, but she doesn't seem to spot the tiny red dot behind the glass bulb above the entrance. OoOh, CAMERAS and MAGIC DOORS, you mutter with a bemused grin forming on your face, VERY impressive!She doesn't waste time striding in like she owns the damn place. As the door slams shut behind Stan, you make a mental note of where the camera is--whoever let her in might be too preoccupied to see you if you decide to follow through the front, but it never hurts to be careful, right? 'Do it right or don't do it at all', right, pops?A mint-flavored sigh escapes your mask filter. Recap: backdoor's an option. So's the front. Looking skyward, you squint a bit at what looks like some sort of VENT nestled between the metal 'fingers' of the building... might be worth the climb if it keeps you out of sight. Stowing your binoculars in your pocket, you drum your gloved fingers on the van's ash-covered dashboard as you give THE GALLERY one more sigh--everything about this smells like someone WANTED someone to break in--the question is, were they expecting YOU, or STAN?Eh, doesn't matter. What matters is that you get in there before Stan breaks something... or someone. Weighing your options, you eventually decide to:>USE THE FRONT DOOR. IT'LL GET YOU CLOSEST TO STAN IF YOU'RE QUICK ABOUT IT!>HIT THE BACK DOOR. YOU WON'T BE CLOSE TO STAN, BUT WHO KNOWS WHERE YOU'LL END UP?>THE ROOF. THE CLIMB COULD BE DICEY, BUT VENTS MIGHT BE SAFER THAN THE GROUND FLOOR!>THAT SEWER MANHOLE NEARBY! YOU'RE NOT KEEN ON THE SMELL, BUT IF IT GETS YOU IN UNDETECTED...>WRITE-IN!
>>5213056>>USE THE FRONT DOOR. IT'LL GET YOU CLOSEST TO STAN IF YOU'RE QUICK ABOUT IT!
Getting a little late on my end, so I'll pick this up THURSDAY AROUND 4-5PM PST! Hope to see you then!
>>5213056>USE THE FRONT DOOR. IT'LL GET YOU CLOSEST TO STAN IF YOU'RE QUICK ABOUT IT!We can't play support if we're too far away to do so.
>>5213056>HIT THE BACK DOOR. YOU WON'T BE CLOSE TO STAN, BUT WHO KNOWS WHERE YOU'LL END UP?Make like the Breaking And Entering Barrister and dunk on that lock.
Rolled 2 (1d2)>>5213056>1 front door>2 back door
>>5214004You made it a TIE, you maniac! Will wait a little longer!
>>5213317>>5213458>FRONT>>5213594>>5214004>>5214278>BACK!Now we're cookin'. ROLL ME 1d100-5 FOR REASONS... I'LL TAKE THE BEST OF 3 ROLLS! I'll assume you're gunning for the backdoor Mitz saw earlier, but if there's anything else you're on the lookout for or if you have any specific strategies on the approach, feel free to write 'em in!Also since I neglected to mention, here's a few MITZI FACTS:INVENTORY:>1 SECURITY HELMET AND MASK>1 BODY ARMOR>1 SCIENCY GUN>1 DIVING KNIFE>1 PAIR OF BINOCULARS>1 RADIO (TO CONTACT STAN)>1 FAMILY PHOTO>1 CLEARWATER DAM BIKINI (NOT WORN)>1 TUBE OF LIP BALM>1 PACK OF PEACH GUM>1 PACK OF MINT GUM>5 BAGS OF PICKLE CHIPS>1 STUN BATON>1 SUBMACHINE GUNPERKS:>COVERT N' ALERT! Mitzi gets a +5 BONEUS to all STEALTH, SCOUT, and TECHNICAL ROLLS!>TOMBOY TREADS! Mitzi gets a +5 BONEUS to all ATHLETIC ROLLS thanks to her SMOKIN' BOD!>NINJA PRO! Mitzi gains a +5 BONEUS to any attack on an unaware opponent!I've chucked this info into the PASTEBIN in case you wanna peruse it. Good luck!
Rolled 41 - 5 (1d100 - 5)>>5214382
Rolled 25 - 5 (1d100 - 5)>>5214382Go, aloof-ed one. Go and show them your might.
>>5214469Oof.I need one of you to pull a W out of this.
Rolled 57 - 5 (1d100 - 5)>>5214382
>>5214470Is 52 a win?
>>5214491It DOES! Barely!>>5214410>>5214469>>5214485>HIGHEST ROLL: 52!Writing the last update of the evening!
>>5214515>>5214491That'll do 'er.
https://youtu.be/MUBo2uBmBfIWhy, hit the BACK DOOR, of course! Granted, experience tells you it’s much harder watching someone’s back when they’re on the opposite side of the building, but you’ve got a hunch that whoever’s inviting Stan to abandoned art galleries is gonna be keeping an eye on her, not the back entrance.Slipping through your refuge’s shattered windshield like a stoat on a mission, you make your way around the back of the building with nary a sound. It’s all about the footwork, really–once you learn where to put your boots and what not to step on, all that remains is your gear rattling against your armor… but you took care of that ages ago. It’s a pain keeping all of the straps so tight and close all the time, but it hasn’t screwed you over yet…Time enough for that, though. As you slink over a rust-covered chain link fence bordering your target’s loading zone, you’re just about to touch down when you spot a faint glimmer of crimson-tinged light reflecting off of a gossamer length of wire. Gripping the fence in mid-drop, your boots stop a hair's-breadth above the mirage–just enough to feel the trap’s tension underneath your heels.Carefully moving your feet to a more suitable patch of pavement, you drop with the grace of a cat next to the tripwire. Sneaky, you think to yourself. Very sneaky!You’re just about to trace the trigger to its payload when you hear something loud crackle from within THE GALLERY–an intercom, maybe? No time to smell the roses, you reason, you’ve got a back to watch, after all.Once you’ve seen one, the rest of the tripwires lining the loading dock kinda pop out. Dancing silently across the pavement towards that back door you saw, your mind slowly paints a picture of whoever set this deathtrap up–you’ve never been that much of a people person, of course, but this guy… if they even are a guy… strikes you as being very patient–or at the very least batshit paranoid if this is just the outside of the building!By the time you reach the loading dock, you must have nearly tripped a dozen traps–good thing there’s no one around to see you, right? Retrieving a small HAIRPIN from your pocket, you immediately get to work on the back door’s lock–aside from the static blast a few moments earlier, the art gallery’s grown unsettlingly quiet.Unlike the welcome you received in the loading area, the lock pops off rather easily–a bit too easily, now that you think about it. Holding your hand out to catch it, you manage to minimize the ensuing rattling of the attached chain… not that it doesn’t make a sound, of course. Gritting your teeth at the unnecessary noise, you allow yourself a quick exhale as the door lazily swings open……before suddenly picking up speed as a counterweight drops on the other side! >CONTD.
>>5214548Jabbing your hand out to grab it, you half slide, half fall through the open door–your sudden freefall taking you into the inky darkness of a maze of cargo crates… and the business-end of a shotgun fastened above the interior door frame. Guess that explains the counterweight, huh?Rising to your feet, you sever the weight from the wire looped around the shotgun’s trigger and let it drop at your side--so far so good!Even better, you think as you squint through the stacks of crates around you, you’re officially behind the scenes now. If someone’s hiding in here, you reason, they’re gonna be holed up here somewh-“YES,” Intones a gravelly, monotone voice from above, “You’re right on time, Stanley. And not a moment too soon, either…”Instinctively freezing up at the sudden noise, you settle down a bit as you notice the dusty speaker it’s coming from–guess whoever’s talking to Stan has to address the entire building, huh? “Yes, my dear, I can hear you… and, as you might have already deduced, I can SEE you too… We’re very close now, you see…”Great, you sigh as you catch the faint scent of some kind of gas through your mask’s filter, he’s theatrical! At least it’ll buy you some time. Scaling a nearby stack of crates, you drop back down when you notice the telltale red glint of a SECURITY CAMERA overlooking the whole cargo area. Staying out of sight, you spot a few points of interest as the voice continues to reverberate throughout the building:“We haven’t properly met, no, but I’ve been studying you… I’ve witnessed your struggles… your pain… I’m SO close now, Stanley–so close… but I need more.”A pair of FIRE DOORS sit at the back of the loading dock–no doubt leading into a storage area or back room. They ain’t locked, you observe, but this guy’s already proven he doesn’t need locks, hasn’t he?“Consider this… an INTERVIEW, of sorts. An opportunity to truly see what drives you.”A metal staircase snakes upwards towards a catwalk, and at the end sits a singular door–one that strikes you as ‘MAINTENANCE’ more than anything else. Perfectly ordinary–almost too ordinary.“Each room has, shall we say, a QUESTION for you to answer. Abandon the delusions of a ‘CORRECT’ or ‘MORAL’ choice–I won’t tolerate anything less than pure, unfiltered HONESTY.”And then there’s a VENT. You nearly missed it behind those boxes, but something about their placement gives off strange vibes–like this guy staged it. Still, you reason, a vent’s a vent–you’ve watched enough action flicks to know how many doors those open...>CONTD.
>>5214550“Indulge me, my dear, and we have much to gain from one another,” the voice crackles over the speaker above. “Refuse, and I will be forced to do things we’ll BOTH regret.”Peering around the corner of a crate stack, you spot a faint outline on the box next to you–one almost identical to the shape of your hand. Pulling away, your pulse quickens as your glove is covered in a thin, red layer.Yea, you snort, wiping the dried viscera onto another box, he’s gonna regret it, alright…Where do you head next? Time’s tickin’.>THE FIRE DOORS. THE BACK ROOMS ARE PROMISING!>THE MAINTENANCE DOOR ATOP THE CATWALK!>THE VENT BEHIND THE CRATES!>STICK AROUND AND LISTEN LONGER–MAYBE YOU’LL GET A CLUE FOR WHERE THIS VOICE IS COMING FROM!>WRITE-IN!
That's all, folks, at least for tonight! Will pick things up again FRIDAY AROUND 4-5PM PST! Happy Almost Weekend!
>>5214551>>THE FIRE DOORS. THE BACK ROOMS ARE PROMISING!I'd want to go in the vent but we should catch up to Stan ASAP
>>5214551>THE FIRE DOORS. THE BACK ROOMS ARE PROMISING!
>>5214551>THE FIRE DOORS. THE BACK ROOMS ARE PROMISING!I'm kinda terrified to imagine what Stan would get up to when we can't see it.
What does that sciency gun do again? I forgot.
>>5214793Bones here--it's that raygun that dweeb Denise threatened you with when you first met her! Burns through most things with a neat 'pew-pew' noise and fires at a decent rate. Might be leaking radiation, but you can't argue with the results!
>>5214551>THE FIRE DOORS. THE BACK ROOMS ARE PROMISING!💀
>>5214555>>5214568>>5214790>>5215179>FIRE AT WILL!Writing!
No time to waste here–there’s no telling what kind of trouble Stan will get into if left to her own devices, especially when other people’s lives are hanging in the balance! While the vent and the catwalk have promise, you opt to keep it simple and make for the fire doors. Another simple lock hooked up to an old alarm system greets you on the other side of the warehouse, but it fails to give you any trouble.Emerging in a dimly-lit maintenance hall, you’re greeted by a seemingly-endless series of doors–each one about as nondescript as the next. “Formal introductions are later in the program, I’m afraid… enter the next room, if you please.” Another speaker crackles to life with the mysterious puppet master’s rough voice, no doubt responding to some of Stan’s patented ‘charm’. “Oh, and please refrain from any outbursts involving weaponry or that EYE of yours… this IS an art gallery, after all. Wouldn’t want to damage any of the exhibits, would we?”Cupping a hand to the side of your helmet, you can just barely make out a muffled swear somewhere amidst the sea of doors. Was it on the left? The right? Down the hall? God forbid this jerk picks something simple, like a ZOOMMART or something… Trudging down the corridor, your nose wrinkles behind your mask’s filter as you continue to pick up the scent of some kind of turpentine… and something fouler. The smell seems to strengthen further down the hallway, but Stan’s voice sounded nearby…“Question Number 1: think carefully now…” The voice booms just when you’re about to get your bearings, “Relax–this should be simple, especially for you. No, no–they’re both quite comfortable… for now.”You curse. Figures he’d be one of those ‘sociological’ types. You’ve gotta find him or Stan and FAST!“Neither need much of an introduction: the man is, as you can plainly see, a COMMON LOOTER–a greedy parasite profiteering off of CLEARWATER’S MISERY…”He pauses. You can just barely pick up Stan’s muffled voice–it’s close!“ …Working in politics? You’ll have to ask him later when he isn’t gagged. If ‘later’ even occurs for him, that is. As for the other, well… what more can I say that your eyes haven’t already discerned?”Damn it, you hiss, you can’t see! If only you could look through Stan’s perspective somehow! Drat!>CONTD.
>>5215491“Beautiful, yes? Two hundred and six pieces given new life–all to snuff out others. Neither are free of sin, Stanley, but my first question for you is this: which one is worthy of IMMORTALITY?”Good thing you’re not choosing. As you pick a target, you can’t help but wonder what decision Stanley makes…FIRST, CHOOSE MITZ’ ACTION:>FOLLOW STAN’S VOICE!>INVESTIGATE THE SCENT!>PICK THE DOOR CLOSEST TO YOU!>WAIT FOR THEM TO SPEAK AGAIN!>WRITE-IN!SECOND, HOW DID STANLEY RESPOND?>THE LOOTER SHOULD BE IMMORTALIZED!>THE SKELETON SHOULD BE IMMORTALIZED!>THEY’RE BOTH PRETTY IMMORTAL-WORTHY!>SCREW YOU, GUY! *TRY TO BUST THE UNSEEN TRAPS*>WRITE-IN!
>>5215493>INVESTIGATE THE SCENT!Stan can handle herself. She's tough as nails, and the others are still within running distance if it gets really bad.>WRITE-IN!>IMMORTALITY PROBABLY BLOWS. I MEAN, LOOK AT THAT LICH GUY. IT MADE HIM A JACKASS.
>>5215493>>5215632support 💪 🤖
>>5215632>>5215663>>5215698>FOLLOW YOUR NOSE!>AND IMMORTALITY SUCKS, BY THE WAY LOLWRITING!
>>5215742Stan’s a big girl, plus you know her well enough to know that you won’t be having any impact on her decisions–philosophical or otherwise. Besides, you reason as you follow your nose down the hall, something tells you this ‘interview isn’t going to end well, especially when the guy in charge is asking who should be ‘immortalized’...As the chemical scent starts to sting your nose through your mask’s filter, the MC responds to whatever Stan said with a weary sigh:“Indeed–what good is creation if it becomes rote? A chore? An artist without passion is no artist at all, and his works become mere products. An astute observation, my dear, if not unexpected–I suppose the way I had you painted in my mind differs greatly in comparison to the real thing.”As the voice continues to babble, you freeze in front of a door that absolutely REEKS of gas–one slightly ajar in a hallway full of closed counterparts. “I apologize for my assumptions. Worry not, however–the image will become MUCH clearer once this interview is concluded, I can assure you of that.”You’re just about to push the door open when a pair of CRASHES reverberate throughout the building… followed by a long, pitiful wail.“You said it yourself:” Replies the voice over the speakers as you creep into the dark room beyond the door, “Immortality is overrated–Why should either of these wretched parasites be memorialized in my magnum opus? No, Stanley, trash is trash. Leave him where he is, please–I’ll attend to the mess later.”Well that’s not foreboding at all. Before you can ruminate on what you missed, you spot the source of the scent in the dark room beyond: a non-Euclidean mess of pipes and valves haphazardly welded and riveted together into what appears to be some kind of machine–its countless joints and U-Bends periodically hissing with excess gas and chemicals.You’re no expert, of course, but if you had to speculate, you’d say this was some kind of GAS MACHINE–one that, based on how the pipes extend into the ventilation ducts, is set to ‘freshen up’ the whole building. Good thing you didn’t set off that shotgun trap earlier, huh?“About halfway there, my dear. Do mind your step–I was never very good at cleaning up after myself.”You’re not sure what you’re more worried about: Stan accidentally tripping something and blowing you all to the Great Brewery in the Sky, or how much raw fumes she’s huffing without a mask. Either way, this thing’s gotta go.“Question Number 2:” Purrs the voice as the opening door sends another counterweight hurtling towards the ground, “Do you recognize these two?”ROLL 1d100 TO STOP THE DOOR TRAP (You kinda expected another one)! I’LL TAKE THE BEST OF 3 ROLLS!
>>5215803That's it for tonight, folks--hate to end on a roll, but I'm feeling sleepy on this end. Have some plans tomorrow, but should be able to write a few updates SATURDAY AROUND 10-11AM PST! Thanks for playing!
Rolled 87 (1d100)>>5215803 💯
Rolled 67 (1d100)>>5215803C'mon dice gods. I ain't been that much of a dickhead lately.
Rolled 15 (1d100)>>5215803time to roll high
>>5215806>>5215818>>5215826>HIGHEST ROLL: 87!Super! Writing! Again, might get a little busy today, so apologies if today's updates are a little sporadic!
You’re prepared this time, and it’s a good thing, too–snatching the counterweight out of the air like a wayward ball from your water polo days, you spot what it’s hooked up to just in time to step out of the way! Four impeccably-sharpened and noticeably rusty metal spikes swing from above the door frame, impacting where your stomach was just a moment before with a nasty ‘thunk! It isn’t embedded that deep, you observe, but you did grab the counterweight…Maybe this guy doesn’t want to kill you outright? Hey, at least it wasn’t another shotgun–seems like he isn’t that keen on blowing himself up, which is good. Speaking of…“Faceless soldiers of a soulless corporation–marching the streets under the guise of protection… but who are they really?”An icy finger runs down your spine. If the cards were shuffled a bit, you reason, it coulda’ been you in whatever show this guy has going on out there. All the more reason to figure stuff out on this end. Cracking your neck, you take a closer look at the pipes–even with your mask on, there’s a nasty amount of gas leaking from this thing–so much so that you can’t help but think it’s intentional. Insurance, maybe?“This one preys on refugees with a gang of his fellow ‘protectors’.” The voice explains as you search for something that can shut this thing down. “But when the tables are turned, he becomes rather docile, wouldn’t you say? You’d know better than anyone–one of his… associates mentioned an incident involving you and that pale girl of yours… as I understand it, you have a… FRIGID… relationship with them? How quickly the tables turn, yes?”Teddy. Fucking idiot had something coming, but not whatever the hell this is. Guess that means his other goons are around here somewhere… if they’re still breathing, that is. Refocusing your attention on the pipes, your search finally bears fruit–a large, weathered valve sits nestled near the center–not that it’s labeled, of course, but turning it a smidge immediately makes a difference in the density of the gas around you.“Yes, they can hear you.” The voice replies in a bemused tone. “They can’t see, however–for all the good those helmets and masks do in hiding their identities, the eye lenses are remarkably easy to obstruct. Quiet, now–your second choice awaits...”>CONTD.
>>5216325As you prepare to turn the wheel, you find it remarkably loose–in fact, you reason, you could probably rip it off and keep whoever’s running things from starting it again. It is pretty creaky, though…“The other is quite the fan of yours… I still remember the look on his face when you signed his helmet. Quite a race, wasn’t it?” A pause. “Because I watched the whole thing. From afar, naturally.”The hair bristles on the back of your neck–someone was stalking you guys? How the hell did nobody notice!? Momentarily distracted, you notice a mess of cables hidden behind the pipes–following them downwards, your search ends at a grate in the ground hidden under a few corroded barrels–their labels all but weathered away. Craning your ear in their direction, you can just barely hear a distant ‘whirring’... a generator?“I’m incomplete, is why.” The voice continues with growing irritation. “I don’t expect you to understand–not yet, at least. But I’m not the interviewee here. Same question, Stanley: Which one is worthy of IMMORTALITY?”Shit. You know what this means–you don’t have much time before someone gets hurt. Knowing Stan, she’s gonna be really obstinate about it, too… Taking a steadying breath, you weigh your options:MITZ:>TURN OFF THE GAS, BUT LEAVE THE VALVE–WILL THIS GUY NOTICE?>TURN OFF THE GAS AND REMOVE THE VALVE–MIGHT BE NOISY, BUT GOOD LUCK FINDING ANOTHER ONE, DICK!>THAT GENERATOR COULD PUT THIS WHOLE THING ON HOLD–FIND IT!>TRY AND REMOVE A PIPE–YOU’VE GOT A MASK AND THAT’LL SERVE AS A GOOD DISTRACTION!>WRITE-IN!STAN:>TEDDY THE BULLY SHOULD BE IMMORTALIZED!>CAL THE FAN SHOULD BE IMMORTALIZED!>THEY’RE BOTH PRETTY IMMORTAL-WORTHY!>SERIOUSLY, SCREW YOU! *TRY TO BUST THE UNSEEN TRAPS*>WRITE-IN!
>>5216329>TURN OFF THE GAS AND REMOVE THE VALVE–MIGHT BE NOISY, BUT GOOD LUCK FINDING ANOTHER ONE, DICK!>SERIOUSLY, SCREW YOU! *TRY TO BUST THE UNSEEN TRAPS*
>>5216329>>TURN OFF THE GAS AND REMOVE THE VALVE–MIGHT BE NOISY, BUT GOOD LUCK FINDING ANOTHER ONE, DICK!>>SERIOUSLY, SCREW YOU! *TRY TO BUST THE UNSEEN TRAPS*
>>5216465>>5216592>>5216636What everybody else said.
>>5216465>>5216592>>5216636>>5216671>TURN OFF AND DISABLE!&>BUST THE TRAPS!GONNA NEED A 1d100+5, FOLKS--MITZ CAN DO THE VALVE THING PRETTY EASILY, BUT STAN MIGHT NEED SOME ASSISTANCE! I'LL TAKE THE BEST OF 3 ROLLS!Also gonna offer another choice here just in case:>STAY WITH MITZ!OR>RETURN TO STAN!
Rolled 55 + 5 (1d100 + 5)>>5216694
>>5216694>>5216710Uhhh someone please roll better than me.Oh, and let's return to Stan!
Rolled 86 + 5 (1d100 + 5)>>5216694back to Stan!
Rolled 9 + 5 (1d100 + 5)>>5216694Probably go back to Stan.
Gonna pick this up either later tonight or early on Sunday--heading out for some plans. That said, we've got three good rolls, so I'll update once I get the chance. Looks like we're going back to Stan, too!
You waste no time in getting to work on the valves. Even with your mask on you can already feel yourself getting dizzy–normally you’d be concerned by the amount of gas everyone in the building must be huffing, but this is Stan you’re talking about…As you close a few smaller lines, you start to feel the room around you rumble–oh wow, you observe as the pressure builds up, the psycho running this circus didn’t properly set the pipes up. Gasp.When you can no longer find any other valves, you put all your body weight in sealing the last one. A blizzard of paint chips flutter to the ground as the wheel lets out a prolonged shriek–hopefully Stan’s got the MC’s attention. Shutting the valve completely with a triumphant ‘thunk’, you seal the deal by yanking the wheel off its well-worn resting place! As your target comes loose, you bite your lip a bit as the building around you begins to creak and moan from the gas buildup–it’s not perfect, you reason, but if it disarms another one of this asshole’s traps, well…Your internal monologue is cut short by the sound of something clanging onto the floor outside the room. Hiding the valve behind your back, your eyes shift around the surrounding area for hiding spots–probably should have figured this out earlier, huh? Darn.“Interesting choice, Stanley.” The voice drones through the speakers as you inch closer to where you saw the vent, “A bit unorthodox, but still VERY informative…”Maybe it’s the pipes in the walls, but you could almost swear you heard something out in the hall again. Crouching low near the vent, you hold your breath as you contemplate your next move…AND all of that important character-related stuff that you put on hold since you started this whole operation! Let’s see now–what were you thinking about that one person earlier? Oh right, it was-SMOKE YOUUUUUUUUU!You’re STANLEY PARBLE, damn it, and if this guy puts you through one more of his ‘Would You Rather’ bullshit tests, you’re gonna lose your shit! Wading through the mess of metal, wire, and a rubber duck or two, you take a moment to check on both Teddy and Cal–the former coughing up a storm inside his mask, the latter breathing uncomfortably shallow breaths…“Stanley…” Ted hisses as he struggles to fill his lungs with air, “R-right in the nick of time… heh…”Wow, sarcasm! You’re welcome, by the way!>CONTD.
>>5217964His Southern drawl sounds friendly, but you can’t help but pick up a little bitterness behind it–laying him flat on the gallery’s shiny granite floor, your heart skips a beat or two when you notice the sizable trail of blood you make dragging him around!“F-fucker cut my hamstrings…” Teddy growls as he scowls at the deep wounds cut into the backs of his legs. “A-and the others…”“Don’t dawdle now, Stanley…” Croons that annoying droning voice from the crusty speaker in the corner of the gallery room, “One more question and we’re done…. The image is just about complete…”Chucking a rubber duck at the speaker with a dull ‘squeak’, you flip the bird at the voice as the door on the other end of the room unlocks with a cheerful ‘beep’ just like all the rest… and just like the last few, the door behind you begins crackling with electricity. Super.“Oh, and I think THESE particular subjects will be of particular interest to you.” The voice continues. Gus...“Th-the others…” Teddy mutters through a wet cough, “H-he’s got more in a storage area. N-not all of ‘em are alive, but…” Another cough. “Y-you’ve gotta…” Yea, yea, you groan, you’ll put it on your To-Do List! You’ve got a lot on your plate already and whoever’s running this show doesn’t strike you as patient!“S-stan?” Wheezes the second security goon lying amidst the trap rubble, “I-is th-that you?”“Kid don’t sound good…” Ly remarks as you leave Teddy where he is. Nope, you agree as you spot similar wounds on the back of Cal’s legs, he doesn’t. And chances are there’s a lot more messed-up people to save, too. Not to mention ‘You-Know-Who!’“I’ll keep an eye out for her.” Ly replies as he drifts away in his ASTRAL FORM. “An’ if I see anything else I’ll let ya’ know too. Just uh…” your skeleton remarks as you remove a few bits of debris and rubber duck from your BONE CLAWS, “just be careful, yea? Guys like dis’ do nasty stuff when cornered…”Yea, you frown, what’s his deal, anyways? He’s probably not even a LIEUTENANT or anything, so is he just being a dick ON PURPOSE!?“Time’s ticking, Stanley.” The voice gently reminds you. “One. More. Question.”He’s right, of course, but what about these guys you just saved? How do you know he isn’t gonna, like, eat them or something the minute you leave? You’ve gotta do something, but what?>CONTD.
>>5217970CHOOSE 1 OR MORE WITHIN REASON:>DON’T DELAY–HEAD TO THE FINAL ‘QUESTION’! (TAKE CAL AND TEDDY?)>GRILL TEDDY OR CAL MORE–WHAT DOES HE KNOW ABOUT THIS GUY?>CHECK ON CAL–HOW BAD IS HE?>ASK THE VOICE A QUESTION–HE HASN’T BEEN VERY FORTHCOMING SO FAR, BUT SINCE YOU’RE NEAR THE END….>RADIO SOMEONE. IT BREAKS THE RULES, BUT AT THIS POINT… (WHO?)>TRY TO BUST OPEN AN ESCAPE ROUTE! HE SAID NO GUNS, BUT WHAT’S THE WORST THAT CAN HAPPEN?>WRITE-IN!
>>5217972>>ASK THE VOICE A QUESTION–HE HASN’T BEEN VERY FORTHCOMING SO FAR, BUT SINCE YOU’RE NEAR THE END….Someone write-in an excellent question
Kinda dead today, huh? Gonna keep this open until MONDAY AROUND 4-5PM PST just in case we get a few more votes around then--got some plans tonight so I can't promise any more updates til' then. Hope to see you next time!
>>5218260I say we ask him why what he knows about us. He might let something important slip that can let us figure out who or what we're up against.
>>5218260>>5218770>>5218784>ASK HIM WHY WHAT HE KNOWS ABOUT YOU!Tell you what... ROLL ME 1d100 TO SEE IF YOU CAN CONVINCE HIM TO LET STUFF SLIP! I'LL TAKE THE BEST OF 3 ROLLS!BONEUSES awarded to folks with creative/compelling ways to phrase the question!
Rolled 64 (1d100)>>5219365>”so when did you first find me enamoring?”
>>5219365>>5219407Support and add "why do you find me enamoring?"
Rolled 48 (1d100)>>5219365>"Why not pull this on BORIS instead? There something that interesting about me?"
Rolled 51 (1d100)>>5219365>>5219415Forgot roll
>>5219407>>5219415>>5219425>>5219430>HIGHEST ROLL: 64!Writing! Sorry, had to make some din.
Speaking of questions, you venture, giving Cal and Teddy’s prone forms an encouraging thumb’s up, how about he answers one of yours, huh?“Perhaps I haven’t made myself cle-”NoNOno, you interrupt, you answered, like, five of his already–you deserve one in return… at LEAST! Like, you continue, stumbling towards a statement before the voice can get a word in, when did, like, he first find you so, y’know, enemaing?It takes a moment for you to get a response. “...What?”Christ, do you have to repeat yourself for this wise guy too!? You’re asking when he first took an interest in you, duh! Why not pull this crap on BORIS or something? Granted he’s not as cute as you are–far from it–but he’s kinda an EVENING SANITATION COORDINATOR too, so-“I don’t need him for my magnum opus, Stanley–I need YOU. I don’t expect you to understand, nor is it required. Not at this moment, anyways. Now if you please-”Oh boy, you sigh, you get it now.“Get what?” Ly asks in a cautious tone. “Stan, let’s not mess wit’ da’ guy who’s holdin’ our friend hostage, please…”But Ly, you hiss under your breath, this right here? This is classic ART BITCH behavior right here–dude can’t shut up about ‘muh project’, but acts like you can’t understand it or whatever! TYPICAL!“... Still doesn’t change da’ fact dat’ we’re sayin’ dis’ out loud.” Your bones retort. “So uh… can it, will ya?”No, you huff, you won’t, not when you’ve found your in! Let me handle this, Ly! Cracking your neck, you cross your arms before directly addressing the speaker in the corner. Listen, man, you just want to get a better feel for his art, alright? Would he mind explaining it a bit?A pause. “... I… no one’s ever asked me to explain it before…”JACKPOT.“Very well,” The voice continues after a moment of thought, “I suppose I can answer ONE question, but after that-”Third question, yep! So c’mon, man, you continue, voice dripping with faux-interest, tell me about your aaaart!Works every time…“We met only a few days ago, not that it was face-to-face.” The voice explains with renewed pep. “In truth, I was all but content to rot away in my self-fashioned tomb until you arrived–reviving my artistic inspiration like a muse of old!”Yea, you shrug as you check on the survivors behind you, you tend to have that effect on people. Still, you continue, that meeting’s not really ringing a bell…>CONTD.
>>5219656“How could it?” The speaker replies in a bemused tone, “By the time you arrived I was well on my way–once I realized the power I now wield, it was easy to retreat before you and your friends arrived.”“Hold on a sec…” Ly remarks as you continue to struggle with what the voice is talking about, “Somethin’ about dis’ sounds familiar…”“Thanks to the dark sorcery that revived me, I was able to improve myself as I saw fit–I no longer had to gather pieces to form a canvas like some repulsive packrat… with every part I collected, my body became more glorious–more MAGNIFICENT!”Okay, ow, kinda hurting your ears now… What’s this got to do with you, anyways, huh? Is he one of those ‘performance art’ people or something?“Stan, I’m pretty sure he-”“Nothing as gauche as that, no…” the voice replies with a subtle chuckle. “Truth be told, I wouldn’t have discovered you if I hadn’t looped around to see if you had fallen to my traps… but when you emerged unscathed, I knew that I had stumbled upon someone… special.”“Christ, Stan,” Ly scolds as you feel your cheeks warm up, “you REALLY gonna blush at a compliment from a trap-obsessed murder-” Your skeleton freezes mid-sentence as a chill runs down your spine. “Holy crap, Stan… I… I remember now!”Suddenly you do too–this guy… it’s HIM!… you know… HIM!“... you don’t remember, do you?” Ly asks in a weary tone. “Stan, da’ creep hidin’ in da ARCADE– it’s da’ CORPSE-ART KILLER!”Okay, that was your second guess! And shit, that makes sense, actually! Dang!“I’ve followed you ever since, Stanley–just out of sight, of course, but close enough to paint a very basic sketch of who you are.” The voice says. “And, of course, to study your abilities. Tell me: is this ‘Ly’ of yours planning on taking control of me while you ask questions?”You blink. Damn it, that’s a great idea! Why didn’t you think of that!?“I uh… for what it’s worth, cupcake, I still feel woozy from da’ QUARTERMASTER…”Oh yea, you frown, that freak. Speaking of freaks, what’s th-“No. I’ve indulged your request–now it’s time to indulge mine. The door. NOW.”And before you can protest, the door to the next room opens with a loud hiss. Almost immediately you hear the sound of two people–one male and one female–crying out in pain. You recognize the former almost immediately–you only really ever heard him cry or feel pain once in your entire life, and that was when you were watching the end of ELIMINATOR 2: DECISION DAY. GUS!>CONTD.
>>5219659Just before you step through the door, you hear a faint crackle from your RADIO– the hell was that?“Hope Mitz is okay…” Ly remarks as the two security goons crawl towards the wall, “I know she can’t outright contact us, but… if only we had a sign...”Yea, you frown as another faint crackle pops through the gizmo’s speaker, it’d be nice… In any case, you can’t help but feel like you’re standing on the edge of a ledge here–now that you have a vague idea of who this guy is, do you really wanna play ball?Then again, you might not have a choice if Gus is in trouble… what do?CHOOSE 1 OR MORE WITHIN REASON:>DON’T DELAY–HEAD TO THE FINAL ‘QUESTION’! (TAKE CAL AND TEDDY?)>CHECK IN ON THE GUYS YOU RESCUED–THEY SEEM PRETTY DEFENSELESS.>RADIO SOMEONE. IT BREAKS THE RULES, BUT AT THIS POINT… (WHO?)>TRY TO BUST OPEN AN ESCAPE ROUTE! HE SAID NO GUNS, BUT WHAT’S THE WORST THAT CAN HAPPEN?>WRITE-IN!
>>5219660That's it for tonight, folks--started feeling tired only a few minutes into writing that update, so I'm definitely calling it. Should have more TUESDAY AROUND 4-5PM PST-- sorry for the short update!
>>5219660>DON’T DELAY–HEAD TO THE FINAL ‘QUESTION’! (TAKE CAL AND TEDDY?)I don't think it would be smart to keep him waiting
>>5219660>>DON’T DELAY–HEAD TO THE FINAL ‘QUESTION’! (TAKE CAL AND TEDDY?)
>5219660>>DON’T DELAY–HEAD TO THE FINAL ‘QUESTION’! (TAKE CAL AND TEDDY?)
>>5219660>DON’T DELAY–HEAD TO THE FINAL ‘QUESTION’! (TAKE CAL AND TEDDY?)Should probably drag those limps along with us. If that psycho decides to bring this place down or something, then they're done for.
Quick check-in: do you guys wanna bring Teddy and Cal with you to the next room, or will you leave 'em?
>>5220261I'd bring them, would rather not leave the door open for him to use them as hostages again or find a way to kill them behind our back.
>>5219725>>5220183>>5220260and>>5220272>>5220318>BRING 'EM TO THE NEXT QUESTION!So be it! Writing!
Fine, you growl, but you’re bringing these punks with you! You’re not about to leave ‘em lying around for this creepy voice to mess around with!“By all means,” the voice replies in an amused tone, “the more the merrier…”“Eurgh!” Teddy grunts as you begin the slow and arduous process of pulling him towards the door, “Listen, kid: don’t listen to a word that nutjob says–we’ve gotta get outta here an’ fa-”You KNOW, alright? You’re working on it! Grabbing Cal by his collar, you can’t help but sweat a bit as you struggle to carry two grown men through a door–why the hell didn’t you pick that BONE STRENGTH in the first thread?!“It’d be easier if we had someone ta’ help us…” Ly replies in an uncertain voice as Cal mumbles something under his mask. “Da’ hell is Mitz doin’ anyways? You don’t think she got caught, do ya?”Listen, Ly. Mitzi is plenty of things: friendly, calm, fit, attracti-err, COOL, but she ain’t stupid, okay?“Speakin’ of, ix-nay on da’ alking-tay, yea? She might still be sneakin’ around!”He brought it up, but fine! Just when you’re about to ask the deranged killer for help with the hostages, you manage to clear the doorframe and enter the next, and hopefully final room in the gallery.Man, it’s dark!“And here we are, Stanley–the final piece of the puzzle.” A duo of spotlights shine on the center of the barren gallery floor, save for a pair of chairs reminiscent of Dr. Devon’s lab… or a DENTIST’S OFFICE! The lights dangle from some vents overhead, and just beyond the center of the room you can just barely see the outline of one final pair of double doors. To freedom, you think… or something else?>CONTD.
>>5220463Nestled tightly under several jagged metal restraints lie two familiar figures–GUS on the left, MARCIE on the right! If they notice you they don’t make a scene of it–though that might be due to the blindfolds and gags stuffed into their mouths. Yea, you’re gonna go with that.“An old friend… and his dear sister, a new acquaintance. Tell me, Stanley: which one deserves to be IMMORTALIZED?”“D-don’t… Stan…” Cal whispers through his filter behind you as you take a tentative step forward, “Don’t… listen..”“Ignore him, Stanley, he’s delirious.” The voice crackles through an unseen speaker. “I’m aware that my identity doesn’t inspire… trustworthiness… but believe me when I say that it’s in everyone’s best interest that you forego the theatrics this time…”As the voice delivers his warning, one of the spotlights adjusts itself and briefly reveals a matrix of what must be hundreds of thin wires between you and the hostages! “NAILBOMBS.” Ly reports as you strain your eyes trying to see what they’re all connected to. “Lots.” No shit, Sherlock!“And just in case you require some… motivation…” A series of gears at the base of each chair whirr to life as the voice trails off. Fed by a handful of messy cables below the seats, the restraints on both Gus and Marcie gradually begin to tighten!“No pressure, now… just say what comes naturally.”Before you can make your move, your RADIO crackles to life with a singular word:“-is-ract?”“Well, well,” Croons the voice over the loudspeaker, “I was beginning to worry your friends would never call… I do hope you followed my letter’s instructions, Stanley.”Sure, you think to yourself, but that was then… And this is NOW!What’s the play here?>GUS SHOULD BE IMMORTALIZED!>MARCIE SHOULD BE IMMORTALIZED!>NEITHER OF THEM SHOULD BE IMMORTALIZED, YOU FREAK!>STALL! TRY TO GET HIM TO STOP THE RESTRAINTS!>SAY YES TO THE DISTRACTION! BETTER BE READY!>FUCK IT–SLICE THROUGH TO BOTH GUS AND MARCIE!>WRITE-IN!
>>5220465>>NEITHER OF THEM SHOULD BE IMMORTALIZED, YOU FREAK!>>STALL! TRY TO GET HIM TO STOP THE RESTRAINTS!
Alrighty then, gonna leave this open til' WEDNESDAY AROUND 4-5PM PST. See you then!
>>5220465>SAY YES TO THE DISTRACTION! BETTER BE READY!
>>5220578>NEITHER! STALL HIM!>>5220792>>5220814>>5220868>DISTRACTION!Gonna post a quick update--after that I'll check in again around the usual time!
Alright, you've had it up to about HERE with this dude! First he nearly gets you killed with his dumbass traps back at the arcade, then he totally sidetracked the quest with his antics! Worst of all, though, he messed with your pals--fatal mistake, bucko!"Choose, Stanley--I imagine those restraints are becoming rather uncomfortable." Still covered in looter viscera from your first 'decision', you have a pretty good idea of how all this is gonna end... your visions of a trophy and confetti were WAY off! It's no surprise, then, that amidst Gus and Marcie's increasingly-distressed groans and the whirr of devilish machinery you make a judgement call: one that you REALLY hope you don't regret in the next few seconds!Sneakily pressing the 'CALL' button on your RADIO, you allow a small grin to form on your face as you utter the word 'GO' under your breath."Not an answer, I'm afrai-"Not even a second goes by before Mitzi responds-and what a response it is!CHOOSE ONE--PREPARE TO ROLL FOR EFFECTIVENESS, TOO!>A DEFEATED DRONE RINGS OUT ACROSS THE GALLERY AS ALL ELECTRONICS, SPEAKERS INCLUDED, SHUT DOWN!>THE GALLERY IS ROCKED BY A MASSIVE EXPLOSION--FAR ENOUGH TO KEEP YOU AND THE HOSTAGES SAFE, BUT CLOSE ENOUGH TO PUT THINGS ON HOLD!>A WALL CAVES INWARD AND THE TRAP'S CABLES ARE DISCONNECTED AS THE HEADLIGHTS OF A FAMILIAR VAN CRASH THROUGH, YOUR PALS ARRIVING AMIDST A TRILL OF A HONKING HORN! >THE PREVIOUSLY-SCHEDULED BROADCAST IS CUT SHORT BY THE SOUND OF A MOB, FOLLOWED BY A SCUFFLE--SOUNDS LIKE SOMEONE, OR SOMETHING, GOT THE DROP ON THE KILLER!>WRITE-IN!
>>5221146>A DEFEATED DRONE RINGS OUT ACROSS THE GALLERY AS ALL ELECTRONICS, SPEAKERS INCLUDED, SHUT DOWN!This one will at least disable any non-mechanical traps and probably remove his means of control. Tripwires and other shit will still be an issue, however.
>>5221146>A WALL CAVES INWARD AND THE TRAP'S CABLES ARE DISCONNECTED AS THE HEADLIGHTS OF A FAMILIAR VAN CRASH THROUGH, YOUR PALS ARRIVING AMIDST A TRILL OF A HONKING HORN!YEEEEAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!
>>5221146>>A WALL CAVES INWARD AND THE TRAP'S CABLES ARE DISCONNECTED AS THE HEADLIGHTS OF A FAMILIAR VAN CRASH THROUGH, YOUR PALS ARRIVING AMIDST A TRILL OF A HONKING HORN!'MURICA
>>5221146>A WALL CAVES INWARD AND THE TRAP'S CABLES ARE DISCONNECTED AS THE HEADLIGHTS OF A FAMILIAR VAN CRASH THROUGH, YOUR PALS ARRIVING AMIDST A TRILL OF A HONKING HORN!
>>5221210>LIGHTS OUT!>>5221247>>5221638>>5221640>THE HOMIESBeen feeling pretty shitty ever since I got home, so while I won't write an update yet, I WILL ask for...a 1d100 ROLLSTO SEE HOW MANY OF THE TEAM IS READY TO ROCK! I'LL TAKE THE BEST OF 3!Assuming I'm feeling better tomorrow, I'll write an update AROUND 4-5PM PST ON THURSDAY!
Rolled 73 (1d100)>>5221697
Rolled 43 (1d100)>>5221697
Rolled 84 (1d100)>>5221697Let's get em
>>5221701>>5221709>>5221744>HIGHEST ROLL: 84! Let's get 'em, indeed! Writing!
>>5222436bones is kill
The whole gallery shakes violently as a section of the wall caves in, showering the room with light, nail bombs, and wires that make the traps grind to a sudden halt! Taking a particularly weighty chunk of concrete to the face, you topple over onto your back as a familiar set of headlights roars through the new passage with a triumphant trill of the horn!“Sorry we’re late!” Eddie shouts from the driver’s side window, “Parking was a BITCH!”And that’s when the traps go off!“Please, Stan… PLEASE. Ya’ GOTTA stop makin’ dose’ jokes!”Brushing Ly’s admonishments off, you wave your pals over to where Cal and Teddy lie–took ‘em long enough! The van’s barely parked before the whole crew has boots on the ground: Art and Kiki lead the charge, of course–the former advancing cautiously with his rifle drawn, the latter stuffing a fresh belt of ammo into her LIGHT MACHINE GUN. “No sweat, Stan–the CALORIE has arrived!” Talbot announces as he confidently stomps over to Teddy and Cal. “These guys look like shit.” Gently picking them up in his freaky-deaky tentacles, your ex-bodyguard brings them both over to the back of the van while Tucker and Denise watch for tricks–the latter muttering incoherently having managed to wrangle LIL’ STANLEY into some kind of FISHING ROD/LEASH/RACCOON-ON-A-STICK THINGIE!“W-w-w-WH-WHO WANTS S-SOME?!” She squeaks, menacingly shaking the cranky critter at arm’s length!“GUS!”Oh right, you mutter as Sybil brushes the remaining nailbomb triggers aside with a telekinetic hand, you were so excited you totally forgot! Rushing over to the two hostages alongside Syb and Tucker, the latter swiftly removes a FIRST AID KIT from his pocket!“Take it easy–you’re going to be o-”Before the film student can finish his reassuring sentence, the pizza delivery guy BURSTS out of his metal restraints with a nonchalant ‘ngh’. “Hi, Stan. Sorry for the wait.”You don’t know what to say, so after a few seconds of sputtering, you end up hugging the big oaf–he’s… he’s alright, right?!“Yep.” He nods, giving both Syb and Tucker a reassuring thumb’s up, “was hoping the guy who did this’d show up. He didn’t.” Turning his attention towards his sister, Gus raises an eyebrow your way. “You mind helping Marcie?”Not at all! With you, Syb, and Tucker, it doesn’t take long to free her from the trap’s metal clutches! Massaging her abdomen as she rises to a sitting position, Gus’ sister gives you the family ‘quarter-smile’.“Thanks, Stan.”“Looks like we showed up right in the nick of time, huh?” Eddie asks as he clambers over the rubble towards you. “You good, big guy?”“Yep.” Gus nods, “Sorry for the trouble.”>CONTD.
>>5222539Never mind that, you interject in an incredulous tone, how the heck did Eddie pull that off?! Following your finger to the hole in the wall, the film student sheepishly massages his neck. “Wasn’t easy–we must have made three or four dramatic entrances before we got the right room!”“Mitzi contacted us a few minutes ago.” Sybil explains, scanning the surrounding area with glowing eyes. “Is it true, Stan? Are we dealing with our friend from the arcade?”“SYBIL CASTELLANOS…” The voice purrs from a nearby speaker, “I suppose that means this interview is over, hm?”“I got a couple questions for YOU, butthead!” Talbot roars as he unceremoniously drops Teddy and Cal into the back of the van! “Number One: What did the FIVE FINGERS say to the FACE!?”“He’s still around, guys…” Art groans as he examines the doors beyond where Gus and Marcie were held. “How about we don’t piss off the deranged killer?”You’ll piss off whoever you want, alright?! Besides, you continue, shooting a nasty scowl at the speaker in the corner, he started it!“Listen to Officer Berry, Stanley–he of all people would know how close you’ve come to losing friends before…” The voice continues in a tone dripping with smugness. “I wasn’t vigilant enough this time and didn’t notice your shadow… Don’t worry–I never make the same mistake twice.”He’ll never make a mistake again, you snarl, because you’re gonna CLOBBER him! As you, Gus, Talbot, Eddie, and even LIL’ STANLEY menacingly pound your fists into your palms, you’re met with a laconic laugh.“Not today, you aren’t–your missing soldiers are stashed away here somewhere. Act quickly and some of them might just survive. Follow me and, well…” He pauses, “You’ll see what happens. I wouldn’t want to spoil the surprise.”As the line goes dead, the door Art was working on creaks open revealing a hallway leading into yet another gallery lined with an out-of-place rug and two large paintings–neither of which seem to blend with the modern pile of crap they call a gallery!“‘S open!” Art announces! “Should we regroup first?”>CONTD.
>>5222540“Yea!” Talbot roars as he charges ahead, “Regroup his FACE!”“A moment, please…” Sybil mutters as Gus snatches Talbot up by his collar, “There’s something dangerous about that rug…”“Yea,” Tucker sniffs, “The color mismatch is killing me.”“I mean BESIDES that.” Sybil sighs as she massages the bridge of her nose. “There’s a PITFALL beneath… one that leads to the BASEMENT, no doubt.”“Dat’ oughta’ be where da’ survivors are!” Ly concludes in an excited tone! Cool it, alright?“He’s leaving though, isn’t he?” Eddie asks. “Why not just run him down with the VAN?”“H-h-he pr-probably w-won’t use th-the streets…” Denise chimes in, still dangling the raccoon far in front of her. “S-s-so it’s a l-long shot… S-sorry…”Typical, you groan, Denise ruins everything AGAIN! Drumming your fingers on your head for inspiration, you spot the VENT above Gus and Marcie’s traps–the once noble creature now free of its anchors on the ceiling and splayed out on the gallery floor. Could be a way out, you reason, or even a way to this creep’s office!“We still need to find Mitz, Stan.” Art reminds you in a stern tone. “We don’t want this guy creeping up on her…”As if on cue, a tomboy-shaped projectile bursts from one of the paintings in the next room over and lands in a canvas-covered heap in front of her orange-haired counterpart! As Art lets out a shriek that could shatter glass, she chucks the painting remains to the side and gives you an amicable wave. “Sup.”The woman of the hour, you reply with a wry grin. Where did she come from anyways?“Service passage.” She replies, jerking a thumb towards the wrecked painting behind her. “Painting was one of those creepy ones you peer through. Might lead to this freak’s nest, though–wanna check it out?”“Hold on a sec,” Tucker interrupts, “We’ve got wounded in the van–lord knows how many are hidden away in here. We can’t just rush off and leave them unattended!”Why the hell NOT?! This freak isn’t getting away, okay? You want ALL HANDS ON DECK for this!>CONTD.
>>5222543“Th-th-then we sh-should go quickly…” Denise whines as she glances between you and the guards in the van. “Th-they don’t look s-so good…”“She’d know!” Talbot laughs! “Bein’ the QUEEN of, like, NOT LOOKING GOOD! HAH!”As you, Gus, and the others enjoy a round of rousing laughter at Denise’s expense, you quickly recover and address your options–whatever you do, you’re not letting anyone slack off!“I’m goin’.” Gus announces, cracking his knuckles loud enough to hurt your ears. “Wasn’t cool of him to mess with Marcie like that.”“You sure, man?” Talbot asks. “You oughta rest a bit an-”“I’m. Going.” Replies the pizza delivery man in a stern and uncharacteristically-menacing tone. That’s that, then.“You do your thing then, Stan,” Tucker shrugs as Talbot quietly backs away from Gus’ imposing form. “Leave the rest to us.”“I’m not positive,” Sybil announces as her eyes lose their glow, “but I detect quite a bit of life below us–faint though it may be. As for our, ahem, mastermind…” She continues, glancing briefly towards the painting, “I believe you can still catch him if you hurry…”In that case, you reason, it’s time to figure out where you’re needed most!CHOICE 1: WHERE ARE YOU HEADED?>THE VENTS! THEY’RE SMALL, BUT MAYBE YOU CAN AMBUSH THE KILLER!>THE PASSAGE BEHIND THE PAINTING! LET’S-A-GO!>THE PITFALL BELOW THE RUG! SEEMS LIKE THE FASTEST WAY TO THE BASEMENT… BUT IS IT SAFE?>TAKE THE VAN AND HUNT THIS GUY DOWN OUTSIDE!>WRITE-IN!CHOICE 2: WHO YOU BRINGIN’ WITH YA? GUS IS COMING NO MATTER WHAT!>ART! (RIFLE! GRENADE LAUNCHER! REVOLVER!)>MITZI! (SNEAKY! SMG! SCIENCE GUN!)>SYBIL! (MAGIC!)>TUCKER! (FIRST AID! MARTIAL ARTS! RIFLE!)>EDDIE! (SPEEDY! SHOTGUN! REVOLVER!)>TALBOT! (TANKY! REVOLVER!)>DENISE! (ANNOYING! CANNON-FODDER! SMART, APPARENTLY!)>LIL’ STANLEY! (BAD ATTITUDE! SMALL! RABIES?)>MARCIE! (UHHHHH)>EVERYOOOOOOONE!>YOU AND GUS ARE MORE THAN ENOUGH!>WRITE-IN!
Got plans tomorrow and it's getting late tonight, so expect another update either later on FRIDAY or 10-11am PST ON SUNDAY! Sorry for the delay today--was delivering food to a friend. Hope to see you next time!
>>5222545>>THE PITFALL BELOW THE RUG! SEEMS LIKE THE FASTEST WAY TO THE BASEMENT… BUT IS IT SAFE?I feel like taking chances.>TALBOT! (TANKY! REVOLVER!)>SYBIL! (MAGIC!)Both, along with us, are guaranteed not to die if we take the jump.
>>5222545>THE PITFALL BELOW THE RUG! SEEMS LIKE THE FASTEST WAY TO THE BASEMENT… BUT IS IT SAFE?>MITZI! (SNEAKY! SMG! SCIENCE GUN!)>SYBIL! (MAGIC!)>LIL’ STANLEY! (BAD ATTITUDE! SMALL! RABIES?)If the creep has researched as well as he says let's bring someone he knows nothing about
>>5222545>THE PASSAGE BEHIND THE PAINTING! LET’S-A-GO!>SYBIL! (MAGIC!)
>>5222637>>5222702>HIT THE PIT>>5222880>SECRET PASSAGE!PARTY TALLY:>GUS: HE'S GOING.>TALBOT: 1>SYBIL: 3!>MITZI: 1>LIL' STANLEY: 1Looks like Syb and Gus are jumping down a hole with us. That's friendship, right there! Writing!
First thing’s first, you mutter in an appropriately serious tone–no one gets left behind!“You left me behind that one time.”Shut up, Art, you were dead! AS you were saying… NO ONE GETS LEFT BEHIND. You’re heading downstairs and you’re taking the EXPRESS ROUTE!After receiving a round of confused stares from your friends, you dispel the mystery by pointing towards the rug in the next room over and earn a round of ‘Ooooh’s for your trouble. Tearing away the rug covering a PERSON-SIZED HOLE BORED INTO THE FLOOR, Gus shoots you an expectant, but still classically-vacant look.“Ready.”“You uh… you wanna borrow a gun, big guy?” Eddie asks as he kindly offers the pizza delivery golem his SHOTGUN.“Nah.” Gus shrugs. “Thanks, though.”Comforting as that is, you’re not entirely keen on flying blind–snapping your fingers a few times in Syb’s direction, you hiss for her to float on over. She’s needed!“Understood.” She nods as she floats on over. “With luck we’ll run into our esteemed host along the way…”“Wit’ our luck? Who can say?” Ly remarks as the three of you take your positions around the pit.“Hang on!” Talbot shouts in his perpetually-outdoor voice, “What the hell are WE supposed to do, huh!?”“Th-th-there’s an awful lot of b-bombs under the v-van… M-maybe we m-move it? A-and stay inside?” Denise suggests, dodging an attack from her most recent evil creation: THE RACCOON ON A STICK!They can figure it out, you snarl! They’re big boys and girls! “We can watch the perimeter–make sure the creep doesn’t escape topside.” Mitzi shrugs, earning a round of nods from the others.“From the van, of course.” Tucker suggests, jerking a thumb towards your vehicle where Kiki idly pokes a NAILBOMB with her gun. “I can work my magic on the two survivors in there too.”GREAT, you groan, now can you PLEASE jump down the DEATHTRAP HOLE now!?“One more thing:” Art adds, earning a round of groans from the rest of the team, “Shut up! It’s important!”If this is just to get a smooch from Syb, you’re gonna SLUG him…>CONTD.
>>5223983“If you uh… go MIA...” He begins…Why the HELL would you go to the National Institute on Aging?! Get your head in the game, Berry! “I said ‘MIA’!” Art growls as he deftly dodges your attempt at flicking his helmeted forehead! “If you go missing, you ass!”Oh. Well they already know the chain of command, you continue as you give your VICE-COMMANDER a knowing grin.“... the raccoon can’t be in charge, Stan.”Says who? Oh, that’s right: the CURRENT QUEEN OF THE TEAM, THAT’S WHO! When no one continues to argue the point, you settle the dispute with a haughty ‘hmph’! Damn right! As your VICE-COMMANDER pauses mid-swing to give you a wink, you prepare once more to hop down the hole. “Careful, now…” Sybil mutters under her breath, “There’s bound to be traps on the way down…”In that case, you sigh, you’ll take point. Last one down’s a rotten egg!Hopping in with the customary ‘CAN OPENER!’ shout, you let gravity do its thing as you keep your eyes peeled for traps!“Oh look–there they are!” Ly remarks as you spot them as well! Lining the rough edges of the hastily-dug pit are several SCRAP METAL SPIKES--their sharp edges reddened with an unhealthy amount of rust! Not wanting to get a Tinnitus shot later, you activate your BONE ARMOR and BONE CLAWS and prepare to clear the way for your friends!ROLL 1d100+5 TO SLICE N’ DICE! I’LL TAKE THE BEST OF 3 ROLLS!
Rolled 56 + 5 (1d100 + 5)>>5223985
Rolled 45 + 5 (1d100 + 5)>>5223985
Got company over at the moment, but feel free to roll again for the 3rd roll--will update later on!
Rolled 34 + 5 (1d100 + 5)>>5224134Rollan
>>5223986>>5224036>>5224136>HIGHEST ROLL: 61!Writing!
Okay, good news first: you manage to avoid goring yourself on the spikes. Slashing at the gauntlet of spikes and pointy bits as you go, your armor suffers a few nicks and scrapes, but nothing you’ll have to worry about. The bad news, or badder news, lies below you–amidst a shroud of steam thick enough to carve through with a butter knife lies the wreckage of something big, wooden, and unpleasantly jagged. It takes you a moment, but as your fall takes you closer to the bottom, you suddenly identify it as the remains of some kind of-“FRUUUUUUUUIIIIIT CAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRT!”Yes, Ly, A.K.A ‘CAPTAIN OBVIOUS!’ Before you can correct your trajectory, you end up landing with a sickening ‘CRUNCH’ on a particularly-jagged hunk of wood–one that probably would have disemboweled you if you didn’t have all this nifty BONE ARMOR of yours! What a relief, huh?“Still hurts like hell, cupcake.” Hisses your skeleton through clenched teeth. Yep, you groan as pain shoots past your armor and throughout your chest, it sure does! Rolling off of the wooden debris, you take a moment to catch your breath amidst the steam cloud as you watch the second member of the team descend into the pit! Like a purple-haired leaf on the wind, Sybil gracefully floats to the bottom, dicing the spikes you missed with a conjured RADIANT BLADE from her hand.“Are you alright, Stan?” She asks as she gently lands and bends over to examine you. “You aren’t injured, are you?”No, you grunt, still lying on the ground, you’re good… so that’s what she’s wearing underneath that sweater, hu-“Quit it.” She snarls as she delivers a swift kick to your ribs. “And get up–Gus should be with us at any mom-”While Syb landed like a leaf, Gus lands like a brick--the two of you barely have time to clear the LZ before the pizza man hits the ground feet-first with an impact that would give a meteorite a run for its money! Reducing the fruit cart remains to splinters, Gus takes a moment to shake the debris from his shoes before looking your way expectantly.“You ready?”Are you? >CONTD.
>>5224615You find yourself standing at a crossroads, of sorts–though the floor is hidden and the noise is drowned out by a layer of steam, you can tell by the weathered emergency lights lining the tunnels that you’re in some kind of maintenance area. “Passages leading to the boiler, I’d imagine.” Sybil muses as her eyes glow blue. “... Those signs of life I felt earlier are to our WEST,” she adds, pointing her thumb in that direction. Are they still okay?“Like I said… faint...” She replies, biting her lip. “There’s quite a few of them, though, so there must be a few survivors in decent condition.”“And the guy in charge?” Gus asks in a nonchalant tone that still somehow manages to send a chill down your spine.“Not a clue. I-WAIT!” Motioning for you to be quiet, The Goth scans the tunnels like a dog that just spotted a squirrel! “... THERE.” She concludes, pointing down the tunnel ahead. “It’s faint, but I definitely felt something… but he’s heading…”You and Gus stand like statues as your resident witch continues to scan. Today, please!“... THERE.” Sybil concludes as she faces the tunnel to your left. “Whatever I sensed might be trying to escape.”That’s too good for a guess, you mutter. How could he esca-And that’s when you spot it: a small metal sign barely legible thanks to weathering and rust–taking a few steps closer, your squinting eyes widen in abject terror as you read the words on the sign out loud:SEWER ACCESS! The FIEND!“They do know you, don’t they?” Sybil remarks in a contemplative pose. “Unsettling. And unfortunate.”“Let’s go, then.” Gus shrugs as he takes a few tentative steps past the SEWER SIGN. “If we hurry up we can catch ‘em.”Y-yea, but… but who knows what else they’ve got lurking down there?! A-and the hostages-“We can track him down if we head straight as well.” Sybil adds, “But we’d have to be quick about it.”Weighing your options, you relay your instructions to your team:>FIND THE HOSTAGES! YOU CAN STILL SAVE ‘EM!>HEAD STRAIGHT–YOU CAN CATCH UP WITH THE KILLER IF YOU HURRY!>GO TO THE SEWER ENTRANCE–YOU CAN HEAD HIM OFF THERE! B-BUT WHAT IF SOMETHING… HEADS OFF YOU?!>SPLIT UP! (WHO GOES WHERE?)>WRITE-IN!
>>5224621>>SPLIT UP! (WHO GOES WHERE?)Let's make Gus go and free the hostages while us and Syb fight the mini-boss.
Got plans for the rest of the evening, but I should be able to do a few updates SUNDAY AROUND 11-12PM PST! Thanks again for playing and hope to see you next time!
>>5224667>>5225016>>5225257>SPLIT UP AND SEARCH FOR CLUES!Great plan, Fred. Gonna assume Stan and Syb are going together towards the SEWER ENTRANCE while Gus finds hostages!ROLL ME 2d100--1 FOR SYB AND STAN, 1 FOR GUS! MODIFIERS ARE AS FOLLOWS:+10 FOR SYB AND STAN'S PERCEPTION AND OTHER BONEUSES+5 FOR GUSI'LL TAKE THE BEST OF 3 ROLLS!
Rolled 24, 75 = 99 (2d100)>>5225266
Rolled 62 (1d100)>>5225266
Rolled 48 (1d100)>>5225266
Feel free to roll again--got some plans later today, but I can whip up another update or two before then!
Rolled 79, 92 = 171 (2d100)>>5225266
>>5225301>>5225420>>5225423>>5225480>HIGHEST ROLLS:>SYB N' STAN: 79+10= 89!>GUS: 92+5 = 97!That's the ticket! Writing!
Shaking off the sign-induced heebie-jeebies, you steel yourself before giving your pals the scoop. Syb’s going with you, naturally–you don’t want that creep escaping and shitting up another thread with his antics!“Understood.” Sybil nods, eyes flashing blue with excitement! “And Gus?”As exciting as it’d be to see him pummel an undead serial killer into dust, Gus has an especially-important job: one you wouldn’t trust with anyone else in this corridor with you!Okay, maybe Syb, but she’s coming with you, so-“I’m taking down the killer, Stan.” Gus counters in unexpected defiance! “No one messes with my family, y’know?”He’s nonchalant as ever in his explanation, but you can taste the flames behind his words–this guy’s a power keg waiting to go off! Look, you continue in the most diplomatic voice you can manage in the current circumstances, you, Ly, and Syb can handle the freak! “You don’t understand, Stan.” Gus answers, brow furrowed slightly more than usual. You think you do, actually! Planting your feet firmly on the ground, you point an accusatory finger at Gus’ face–he knows the sitch between you and your brother. Does he really wanna risk Marcie losing her bro too?!“Well-” He begins, but you’re too fast! Well, you interject, there’s gotta be a whole bunch of brothers and sisters held in, like, flesh cages or something appropriately grim down here, and you need someone to ensure they’re all going home in one piece! Someone with a cool head and fists the size of your head! SPOILER ALERT: It’s HIM!“... My fists aren’t that big.” He mutters, the heat from before slowly dying down. “Stanley’s right, Gus.” Sybil nods as she reassuringly places her pale hand on his shoulder. “Don’t let that anger distract you from what’s important here: saving lives.”The pizza delivery guy stares at you both for a moment, then breaks the silence with a solemn “Alright.”That does it, then! Clapping your hands a few times, you yell for everyone to get moving–this jackass could be halfway to Timbuktu by now!“Let’s.” Syb nods before taking your hand in hers. “Stay alert, Stan–I doubt we’ve seen the last of the killer’s tricks…”Yea, you nod, Gus’d better be careful too! Giving you a reassuring thumb’s up, the deliveryman lumbers off in the direction Syb sensed the hostages as he leaves you with one last sentence: “Seeya outside.”With that, you and Syb proceed down the steamy tunnels to catch a killer!>CONTD.
>>5225569“Told you.” Sybil mutters under her breath as you both methodically slice through another series of tripwires placed along the tunnel. You’ll admit you were taken off-guard at first, but after the eighth or ninth set of traps it got kinda old.“Say what ya’ will about da’ guy,” Ly remarks as you stuff a NAILBOMB into your pocket, “he knows his way around a trap or two!”“A shame he couldn’t direct this creativity towards something more… hold on…” Sybil slows down mid-jog to burn away another wire with her RADIANT BLADE, “... there we go. Something more beneficial...”The hell’s she talking about? This is plenty beneficial, you retort as you stuff ANOTHER NAILBOMB into your inventory! At this rate you’ll be able to blow apart a whole continent!“Save it for our quarry, please.” Sybil hisses as the two of you emerge, or rather enter a room filled to the brim with thick, hot steam! Not as hot as the stuff you encountered at the DOGGIE BONE FACTORY, of course, but if you had to give it a name you’d call it ‘Armpit Temperature’. That oughta’ explain it.“Look there!” Whispers your pale pal as she points a finger across the expanse! Past what look like the tops of several boilers sits a sign lit up for emergencies–the words ‘SEWER ACCESS’ punctuated by a bright red arrow pointing deeper into the foggy abyss! Swallowing the lump forming in your throat, you look to Sybil for confirmation–this is it, huh?“Yes…” She nods as she quietly scans the steam. “But I don’t sense him… Let me check if he already lef-”Before Syb can finish, the steamy air hisses as a RUSTY CLEAVER whizzes through the air and embeds itself into the wall next to your heads! Sending a magical blast from where it came from, your pal growls as a familiar voice rises from within the steam:“Well, well, well… letting your friends handle my scraps, Stanley? Very predictable.”Another cleaver sails through the fog–this one from a completely different direction! Dodging to the side, you preemptively armor up with an agitated snarl–jig’s up, asshole! Show yourself!>CONTD.
>>5225570A low, rumbling laugh reverberates throughout the room. “I don’t think so… I know you, Stanley–you won’t follow me into the sewers. And powerful though you may be, Sybil, you’re still human…”Syb responds by firing another volley of ARCANE BOLTS into the steam cloud! “Don’t listen to him, Stan–he’s trying to bait us.”“Am I now?” croons the voice. “Or perhaps I’ve already left and this is one last distraction…”“It’s not.” Sybil snaps. “He’s in here, Stan–I can smell it.”“Then you can no doubt smell something else as well.” Replies the killer in a bemused tone. Yep, you nod, CINNAMON. You really gotta figure out what happened to you back on that boat…“Wait…” Syb interrupts as she takes a few whiffs of the air. “It’s… gas?”“Astute as always.” Replies the killer, voice drawing closer to the sewer sign below. “I imagine you’re feeling rather light headed by now–and don’t worry, Stanley: I took your, erm, tolerance, into account.”The boiler pipes below creak. “It’s too late, I’m afraid–you and your friends will be taking a nice, long nap by the time I’m gone. Don’t worry though–I’ll come back for you.”You and Syb exchange a look of terror as the reality sets in–shit, you think, how could you not notice?! Reaching for your SEA CLOAK, you slow down a bit as you and Sybil come to a similar conclusion:You uh… you don’t feel very tired, actually.“W-wha?” The voice asks from the fog below. “Don’t try to trick me, Stanley, I-”Nah, you mutter, shaking your head, you feel pretty normal, actually. Kinda hungry, but… yea.An awkward silence permeates the room for a while before the voice speaks up again.“Damn that girl… well played, Stanley–I’ll have to remember to repay your friend in full when I hunt her down next…” Slowly regaining his original bravado’ the killer’s voice pops up again from another corner of the room. “In that case, I suppose it’s time for drastic measures…”A singular ‘beep’ rings across the room before the whole building QUAKES under a series of booms above! Losing your balance, both you and Sybil tumble down into the steam cloud as chunks of ceiling come crashing down onto the metal floor!“Not the most elegant solution, I’ll admit, but desperate times call for desperate measures, yes?” The voice asks as you scramble to your feet! “I’ll be sure to dig up your remains once the gallery finishes crumbling. And don’t worry–I’ll put your pieces to good use!”“STAN!” Sybil shouts from a few boilers over, “Stall him!”Easy for her to say, you grumble as you creep through the steam! You don’t even know where this asshole is! >CONTD.
>>5225572Cupping your ear with your hand, you struggle to hear his footsteps amidst the falling ceiling and the steam hissing from the pipes around you… “Leave it ta’ me, Stan–I’ll track da’ bastard down!” Ly shouts before disappearing into the steam! Alone with a savage killer in a maze of steam, you pool all of your slasher movie knowledge together as you formulate a plan:>FIND SYB! YOU DON’T WANT THIS GUY GETTING THE DROP ON HER!>SEE IF YOU CAN TURN OFF THIS DAMN STEAM! HE CAN’T HIDE FOREVER!>STAY HIDDEN WHILE LY TRACKS THE CREEP DOWN! LET HIM COME TO YOU!>CLIMB BACK UP TO WHERE YOU CAME IN–YOU CAN SHOOT THE BASTARD FROM THERE!>ASK HIM SOMETHING--TRY TO DRAW HIM OUT, THEN ATTACK!>REMOTE-CONTROLLED DUUUUUUUUCK!>WRITE-IN!
>>5225573>>CLIMB BACK UP TO WHERE YOU CAME IN–YOU CAN SHOOT THE BASTARD FROM THERE!
>>5225573>CLIMB BACK UP TO WHERE YOU CAME IN–YOU CAN SHOOT THE BASTARD FROM THERE!
>>5225601>>5225697>>5225999>CLIMB TO SAFETY!Writing!
https://youtu.be/GjzzXNIrv28First thing’s first: get outta the steam! It’s dangerous!“Glad dat’ lesson stuck!” Ly shouts from across the misty expanse! Doesn’t he have a KILLER to find?! Anyways, you continue, nothing good can come of sticking around in here, so using the awesome combined power of your SHORT-TERM MEMORY AND FEMININE INTUITION, you retrace your steps up to where you were before, A.K.A the ledge right behind you! Just when you’re planning on taking the longer route around, another MEAT CLEAVER sails through the steam and delivers a glancing blow to your armor–how many of those does this jackass have!?Clambering up the side like a raccoon going for a bird feeder, you immediately notice a distinct change in visibility–above the cloud, at least. From your semi-lofty perch, which you recognize as a railing-lined ledge with stairs leading to the boilers below, you notice two-no, three things:First, a faint BLUE GLOW moves swiftly towards the sign leading to the… ugh… sewers. If you had to guess, you’d say Syb was planning something with the exit. Someone really oughta cover her, huh?Right, that’s you! Speaking of cover, you notice a flash of movement in the cloud layer below–a brief one, of course, but movement all the same! Slithering through the mist is the faint outline of a hood, but it’s gone before you can really draw a bead on him! Damn!And then there’s the roof. It’s, uh… it could use more than a new coat of paint, to use an Evening Sanitation Coordinator saying. As the building continues to shake from whatever detonated above, long, jagged cracks slowly spider across the ceiling in the chunks that haven’t already fallen! As if the crazed bastard below wasn’t enough!You were properly motivated before, but now you’ve got an extra ‘oomph’--better take this freak down sooner rather than later!ROLL 1d100 (+5 FROM BUNNY SUIT, +5 FROM LYCONNAISAANCE, -10 DUE TO SNEAKY KILLER AND STEAM COVER!) TO TAG THIS GUY! I’LL TAKE THE BEST OF 3 ROLLS!While you suss that out, I’d also like to know WHAT YOU USE TO SHOOT AT HIM!>SCOPED RIFLE!>ROCKET LAWNCHAIR!>SHOTGUN!>EYE LASER!>NAILBOMBS? (YOU PICKED UP TWO AND I TOTALLY DIDN’T FORGET TO UPDATE THE INVENTORY PASTEBIN, HONEST!)>SOMETHING ELSE (WRITE-IN!)
Rolled 52 (1d100)>>5226508>EYE LASER!
Rolled 86 (1d100)>>5226508>SCOPED RIFLE!
>>5226512>>5226516>>5226566>HIGHEST ROLL: TWO 86'S! YOWZA!Writing!
Retrieving your REGGINGTON BOLT-ACTION SCOPED RIFLE from the depths of your pockets, you scan the steam below with the titular scope for any sign of your, uh, admirer from afar.… nope. Stupid steam! You’ve half a mind to start firing indiscriminately when you spot it–a faint yellow glow amidst the fog!“HERE!” Ly shouts, clearly not worried about being heard, “He’s HERE!”Then that’s where your bullet’s gonna go, you hiss through clenched teeth as you line your sights up with Ly’s ASTRAL FORM! Locking eyes with you through the rifle’s sights, your skeleton gives you an encouraging thumb’s up as you exhale and pull the trigger!You hit something–you’re damn sure of that! Seconds after the sound of thunder cracks across the room, you hear something splinter into countless tiny pieces followed by the sound of something falling over! Grinning madly, you can barely contain the excitement in your voice as you taunt the blowhard–guess HE’S the uh… the murder victim now! HA!“Not yet!” Ly shouts as something scampers deeper into the steam! “He’s on da’ move–nasty-lookin’ guy!”Whatever said nasty-lookin’ guy is planning, he’s too late–Ly scarcely has time to follow the killer before a cold breeze caresses your face. Glancing towards its origin point, you watch as Sybil finishes her magic on the exit–a massive wall of ice blocking the way out!“Your stalking days are over, Slauson!” Syb shouts across the room! Was that his last name? Shaking the thought off, you follow up with Syb’s threat with one of your own: yea, you snicker, and you’ve got a question for him this time: does he wanna do this the EASY way, or the HARD?!Your answer comes in the form of an ear-splitting shriek of metal in the boilers below! “Poor choice of building materials, you two.” Croons Slauson as even MORE steam floods into the room! “I’m sure even you’re aware of what steam does to ice, Stanley, but just wait until you see what it can do to human flesh!”Cackling madly, the voice’s owner is nowhere to be seen as the cloud’s thickness, and temperature, increases by the second! You were toasty before, of course, but now it’s starting to feel like someone’s smothering you with a hot towel! Aiming your rifle once more, your kind gesture is rewarded with a pair of BUTCHER KNIVES whizzing past your head! Armor or not, that woulda’ stung! “He’s in here somewhere!” Ly shouts as Sybil slinks back into the steam! “Just uh… sit tight!”No sooner than those words escape Ly’s ASTRAL MOUTH than a chunk of the roof slams onto another boiler! Yea, something tells you you don’t have the luxury of ‘sitting tight’ for long!>CONTD.
>>5226623What’s the plan? This guy’s just a normal bonehead, right?>HOLD POSITION AND HAVE LY SPOT AGAIN!>LINK UP WITH SYB–TWO HENS ARE BETTER THAN ONE, RIGHT?>ARMOR UP AND GO FOR CLOSE-QUARTERS-COMBAT–YOU JUST NEED TO GET THE JUMP ON HIM!>REMOTE-CONTROLLED DUUUUUUUUUUCK!>WRITE-IN!
>>5226624>ARMOR UP AND GO FOR CLOSE-QUARTERS-COMBAT–YOU JUST NEED TO GET THE JUMP ON HIM!
>>5226624>>ARMOR UP AND GO FOR CLOSE-QUARTERS-COMBAT–YOU JUST NEED TO GET THE JUMP ON HIM!
>>5226998>>5227028>CHAAAAARGE!Last update of the evening: ROLL ME 3d100+5! ONE FOR DODGING, ONE FOR SEEKING, AND ONE FOR HITTING! I'LL TAKE THE BEST OF 3!SECONDLY, YOU CAN HAVE SYB CAST 'HASTE' IF YOU WANT A +5 OF EXTRA INSURANCE! YOU ONLY GET ONE FOR THIS ENCOUNTER, THOUGH! GASP!Use Haste?>YES!>NO!Whatever we roll or choose, I'll probably update TUESDAY AROUND 10-11AM PST! Hope to see you then!
Rolled 40, 90, 82 + 5 = 217 (3d100 + 5)>>5227056I say we save haste for an emergency
Rolled 41, 46, 63 + 5 = 155 (3d100 + 5)>>5227056
Rolled 80, 30, 35 + 5 = 150 (3d100 + 5)>>5227056Who needs haste? We're the fastest bitch in the west.
>>5227099>>5227101>>5227105>THE ROLLS:DODGIN': 85!SEEKIN': 95!HITTIN': 87!Good points all around! Writing!
Hey, yea–he’s just a normal skeleton… the rest is just smoke and mirrors! Brimming with confidence, you leap from your perch in full BONE ARMOR just in time to avoid another nasty piece of falling ceiling! Sailing into the fog like an exceptionally-graceful brick, your flight is interrupted by a hail of BUTCHER KNIVES emerging from the steam cloud!A slower, lamer person would have been mincemeat by now–for a moment you’re almost bummed that BORIS didn’t tag along! Spinning mid-jump, you thread the needle past the sharp objects and land with a ‘thump’ betwixt the leaky boilers! If your target saw where you landed, he doesn’t show it, giving you plenty of time to creep around the corner of a boiler like some kind of armored voyeur. Step One is complete, you think as you try to ignore the unbearable humidity pressing against your armor, now you just need to get this dude!“He’s comin’!” Ly warns from your left! Pressing yourself against some pipes, you watch as a surprisingly large shape scuttles through the fog–its misshapen body propelled by what looks like several legs! Before you can intercept, he’s gone, but you can already guess where he’s headed! Moving to cut him off, you head towards where you last saw Sybil’s blue glow as the sky continues to fall–not much time now, you wager!Turning the corner, you nearly bump into a bundle of blood-crusted rags barreling past the boilers! Realizing who you are, the figure’s coverings burst into threads revealing a grim totem of bones and flesh! Lunging at you with a feral hiss, THE KILLER reveals a dozen spider-like arms from behind his back, each one culminating in a handful of BUTCHER KNIVES, HOOKS, AND CLEAVERS!They’re just a distraction, however–from out of the corner of your eye you see two other limbs, legs, you wager, swinging two chains at your feet! Deftly leaping above the snare, you leap at the killer’s freakish body and go to town with your own blades–your BONE CLAWS slicing through his mix-and-match body like hot knives through especially-freakish butter!One thing always bugged you when you watched other people play STAB–the protagonist fought back a few times in cutscenes and crap, but if that slasher ever caught you in-game? Hoo, boy. You always wanted to be able to give ‘em a taste of their own medicine–to punish them for all those jumpscares they gave you and all of the resulting complaints from your neighbors when you screamed like a little bitch. So when you get a chance to really lay into this bloodthirsty bastard, you don’t hold back, and for the first time in what you assume is a while, Jed here gets to feel like prey.Doesn’t seem like he enjoys it.>CONTD.
>>5227483Roaring in anguish, the killer flails at you with his remaining limbs as the rest of his body tries to escape! With the ferocity of a really angry cat, you deflect the blades you’re unable to dodge and advance with grim determination!“You… I’m not complete, damn you! I’M NOT COMPLETE!” Jed spits as he whips another chain at you! “My Magnum Opus-”Is SHIT, you growl as you parry the chain to the side! Once an ART BITCH, ALWAYS an ART BITCH! Leaping at his retreating form, your attack is foiled by the arrival of a chunk of ceiling–landing with a crash between you and the killer, your target uses the opportunity to slice open another set of pipes!“Each and every piece was meticulously plucked from a sea of worthless CHAFF!” Jed spits from behind the debris! “You and your loved ones will repay me tenfold for each one you’ve VIOLATED!”He can send you a bill! Vaulting over the rubble, you nearly keel over as the steam around you presses against your already-strained armor! Blinking the sweat from your eyes, you’re caught off-guard by a cry of pain a few boilers away–Syb!Not letting the opportunity pass, the killer sends another chain your way from the steam–this one ending in a nasty-looking MEAT HOOK!ROLL 1d100+5 TO DODGE! I’LL TAKE THE BEST OF 3 ROLLS! If you have a COUNTERATTACK in mind, write ‘er in!
Rolled 87 + 5 (1d100 + 5)>>5227484Throw a nail bomb at him
Rolled 58 + 5 (1d100 + 5)>>5227484Put a nail bomb onto the hook and let him drag it back.
>>5227646changing to this
Rolled 21 + 5 (1d100 + 5)>>5227646>>5227484Support
>>5227533>>5227646>>5227744>HIGHEST ROLL: 92!Writing! The capcha has spoken: Stan is PEEVED!
Being a MASTER ANGLER and all, you know better than anyone that there’s nothing better than an unexpected catch–so as you dodge to the side of the killer’s desperate attack, you opt to loop a little boneus on the end of the hook!Jed sees what you’re doing, of course, but by the time he yanks the chain back with one of his remaining arms, you’ve already yanked the jerry-rigged pin out of the NAIL BOMB he inadvertently gave you and stuck it on the hook’s point!Leaving him with a cheeky ‘you dropped this’, you take cover behind the fallen ceiling just as the killer’s own creation explodes in a nasty cocktail of chemical reactions and rusty shrapnel! As the bomb’s payload embeds itself into the ceiling and the surrounding boilers, it suddenly dawns on you that you really oughta’ leave. Like, soon!Peeking over your cover, it looks like the artist-in-residence has a similar idea–with all of the legs he stole reduced to splinters and dust, the slippery bastard slithers across the floor using what few limbs he has left! Not keen on giving him an opportunity for one more scare, you swoop down from your cover with a devious cackle and deftly snatch his head off of his body!“NOOOO!” He roars as you scramble to find Syb, “All… all of my WORK! My tireless effort-”Now he knows how you feel when people ignore the ‘WET FLOOR’ signs, you snarl! Gritting your teeth as you start to feel the steam’s heat worm its way into your armor, you carry the skull under your arm like a football as you skid around the corner! Pressed against the swiftly-melting ice lies Syb–her sweater living up to its name for once as it becomes soaked with the stuff!“Stan…” She groans, barely lifting her face from the ice, “W-we have to go-”Yea, you roar, you figured! Grabbing her sweat-slicked hand, you tug the wilting Goth in the direction you came–you can head back out that way!“No time!” Ly shouts as his ASTRAL FORM dives back into the safe confines of your body! “Did a quick checkup–dis’ whole eyesore’s gonna collapse at any second!”Okay, you frown as a chunk of ceiling the size of a boiler crashes down next to you, what about Gus, then? You can link up with him and find an exi-“STAN, we HAVE to do it!” Sybil gasps as the remainder of the ice melts, adding to the already sizable amount of water vapor in the air, “We HAVE to use THE SEWERS!”You bite your lip as you glance down the tunnel leading out–you uh… you don’t have to, reall-“NOW, STAN!”Okay, okay, sheesh! Still, it’s not like Syb’s in any position to argue right now… what’s the escape plan?>DOUBLE BACK AND EXIT THE WAY YOU CAME IN!>HEAD FOR GUS’ SIDE! YOU CAN LINK UP WITH HIM TOO!>ENTER THE SE-ERR, DO WHAT SYB SAID! MAYBE!>YOU’VE GOT EXPLOSIVES–JUST BLOW A WAY OUT!>WRITE-IN!
>>5227807>ENTER THE SE-ERR, DO WHAT SYB SAID! MAYBE!
>>5227807>>ENTER THE SE-ERR, DO WHAT SYB SAID! MAYBE!
>>5227807>ENTER THE SE-ERR, DO WHAT SYB SAID! MAYBE!She's the smarty pants for a reason. Plus we piss her off enough with our own shenanigans. Best to follow her advice once in a while.
>>5228274>Plus we piss her off enough with our own shenanigans*Insert Montage of Stan Pissing Sybil Off and Ignoring Her Here*Yea, fair.>>5228211>>5228264>>5228273>>5228274>ENTER... THAT PLACE!You didn't think it'd be that easy, did you? PLEASE ROLL ME 1d100-10: +5 BECAUSE OF BUNNY SUIT AND +5 FOR BONE SPEED, -20 BECAUSE OF ABJECT SEWER TERROR! I'LL TAKE THE BEST OF 3 ROLLS! Whatever you do, DON'T THINK OF WHAT COULD BE IN THERE! JUST DON'T!
Rolled 71 - 10 (1d100 - 10)>>5228549
Rolled 44 - 10 (1d100 - 10)>>5228549
Feel free to reroll for our #3--looks like you're off to a good start!
Rolled 29 - 10 (1d100 - 10)>>5228549
Rolled 89 - 10 (1d100 - 10)>>5228549rolling cause I like dice
>>5228707>>5228731>>5228835>HIGHEST ROLL: 61!>>5228838OOF, so close! Props for the dice, though.Writing!
Despite everything in your body protesting against it, Sybil’s bedraggled, but still menacing death glare gives you the motivation you need! Oh, and the building caving in around you too. That definitely helps.Lending The Goth a shoulder, it suddenly dawns on you just how hot things are getting when she recoils from your armor! Opting to float alongside you, Sybil leads the way to the service door at the end of hall illuminated by the aforementioned sign. Not bothering to waste any time, the door CRASHES open as your pal hits it with a telekinetic blast–the sound barely registering over the din of collapsing rubble and hissing pipes behind you!“Nearly there!” She says as the two of you are greeted by a broom closet-sized room dominated by a heavy duty trap door. Fastened with some sort of puzzle lock, the killer’s skull lets out a rueful laugh as a layer of dust falls from above! “Locked… if only you had time to solve i-”“Quiet.” Sybil growls as she vaporizes the lock with her RADIANT BLADE. “After you, Stan.”Yea, you mutter, as a positively WRETCHED smell tickles your nostrils, about that… taking a few cautious steps away from the foul pit, you give Syb an unsure glance–sh-shouldn’t she go first? She’s uh… she’s wearing a dress-like thing, after a-“Forgive me, okay?”Before you can ask for clarification, you get your answer in the form of a shove–one that sends you falling down the hatch and into…Into….Oh MAAAAN…“Pull it together, kiddo,” Ly begins as you find yourself frozen like a statue in a damp, dimly-lit tunnel, “We’re just gonna find a ladder an’ climb back out!”“Right.” Sybil agrees, gracefully landing behind you. “Think of it as a shortcut, Stan.”Sure, you mutter, a shortcut... This place smells like that fighting game tourney Gus dragged you along to that one time and is probably SWARMING with m-m-mu…T-THOSE THINGS, but as long as it’s a SHORTCUT, then what do you have to worry about, right!?“That’s the spirit.” Sybil replies with a wry grin. “Count yourself lucky you have that armor,” she adds as she leads the way forward, “the smell down here is… unique?”THAT’S putting it mildly! Steeling yourself, your body goes into autopilot as you follow Syb’s lead–your mind trying and failing to focus on where your feet go rather than the dark corners and recesses all around you. “There!” Sybil hisses as she points to a manhole and a ladder leading up to it, “Just a little further, Stan–you’re doing great!”Yea, you mutter as you venture a glance at the tunnel around you, you are doing great, aren’t you? Say, maybe this isn’t so bad after all! In fact-BOOSH!>CONTD.
>>5228956It’s a tale as old as time: right when you’re starting to get comfortable, reality rears its ugly head! This time around it takes the form of a slime-encrusted set of jaws lunging out from a nearby pipe! Taking you off-guard, you stumble a bit as the sewer-dweller snaps at your arm, allowing Jed’s skull to wriggle free of your grasp!“See you at the next art show, Stanley!” He laughs, landing in the sludge current at your feet! “I’ll be sure to invite your friends, too!”Laughing maniacally, it takes the skull a moment to realize that unfortunately for him, sewage isn’t exactly known for its viscosity, and after delivering an armored punch to the SEWER GATOR’S snout to assert dominance, you dutifully pick your quarry back up out of the goop and shake a few stringy bits of… stuff... off before stuffing him back under your arm. He was saying?“It appears I’ll have to… reschedule…” Jed sighs as you make your way over to the ladder. Damn right, he will, you snicker! It takes you a little longer than usual since you’re armored up, but once you hit the top of the ladder, the manhole cover pops off relatively easily–so much so, in fact, that you’re already halfway out when a hail of bullets ricochet off the ground next to you!“Stan was RIGHT!” Shrieks an all-too-familiar voice, “The sewer’s crawling with RACCOON MUTANTS!”Disengaging your armor, you shoot Talbot a withering glare as you help Sybil back onto the surface. Shooting a nervous glance at her knee-high boots, your pal looks back your way with a warm smile on her face. “Thank you, Stan–I know that wasn’t easy, but-”But you survived, you interject, despite your misgivings about the sewer being completely and utterly justified!“... It was an ALLIGATOR, though.”Yea, you shrug, mutants use them as pets all the time! Rolling her eyes, Sybil’s face lights up a bit more when she spots Art walking over from the van parked nearby!“Sorry about the bullets,” He mutters as Eddie and Kiki glance your way apologetically. “We had no clue what was going on, so-”What happened, you smile, is that you GOT him! Holding up Jed’s skull for everyone to see, you bask in the moment as your cronies take turns uttering variations of ‘OoOoh’ and ‘AaAahh’.“Gus’ll be happy to meet him.” Eddie grins as he jabs a thumb towards Marcie looking over from the back of the van. “Where, uh… where is the big guy, anyways?”“He went to rescue the remaining hostages…” Sybil replies in a confused tone. “Did… did you not see him?”“What a shame.” Spits the skull under your arm. “Even if he was able to find where I was keeping my materials, there’s no way he could get through my FINAL TRAP-”“Hey, Stan.”>CONTD.
>>5228958You nearly leap out of your skin! Whipping around towards the voice, your eyes widen and Jed’s jaw drops as Gus stands awkwardly behind you alongside a crowd of at least twenty maimed, but still-living hostages! Holy crap, you mutter as the refugees, security goons, and other unlucky contestants bask in the ash-choked sunlight, did this jackass really grab this many people?“More than this.” Gus shrugs as he wraps Marcie into a hug. “They uh… they didn’t all make it, though.”“That bastard took us apart!” Roars a security mook missing an arm! “An’ he made us watch, too!”“STANLEY!” Shrieks a high-pitched voice from amidst the crowd! Before you can react, a red-haired blur tackles you with the force of a meteor and refuses to let go!“I KNEW you’d come save us!” Squeaks your #1 fan and Vent Urchin In-Residence. “Th-they thought I was crazy, b-but… but I was RIGHT! a-and now I’ll never leave the vents again!”There, there, you interrupt, giving Sandy’s head a calming pat, she was right and they were wrong–she just needs to hold onto that fact and never let it go… ever!“Y-you betcha!” Sandy giggles, face still buried into your side! “D-did the DOLL I gave you give you luck?”Yea, you shrug, sure it did! Gently passing the orphan off to a bewildered Talbot, you turn towards Art and frown–how the heck did they know to meet you here, anyways?“Oh, uh…” Art replies as Sybil pours a few water bottles out on her boots, “Your VICE OFFICER made the call.” Following his finger, your eyes lock with LIL’ STANLEY’S as she continues to hang from Denise’s invention. Giving you a wink, the raccoon bends over to gnaw on a five-scoop ice cream cone held in Denise’s trembling hand! SHE did that?!“Nah,” Mitzi grunts, lounging atop the van with an ice cream in one hand, magazine in the other, “Pretty sure she wanted ice cream. Worked out in the end though, huh?”Yea, you frown as you glance between your VICE OFFICER and the popular frozen treat establishment, CREAM DE LA CREAM just across the street, it sure did… but you ain’t dead yet, damn it, and that means you’re taking charge!As your VICE OFFICER shakes her paw at you menacingly, you watch as Tucker emerges from the back of the van with both Cal and Teddy–both security goons looking a bit better than they were before!“Ho-lee shit, Stanley,” Teddy remarks as he limps forward using Tucker’s shoulder for support, “When I asked ya’ to keep an eye out for my missing pals, I never thought you’d be pulling my ass outta’ the fire!”“You mind callin’ Ponderosa?” Asks Cal from Tucker’s other shoulder, “They’re probably wondering where some of us went…”>CONTD.
>>5228959Yea, you shrug, it’s what you do! Now everyone shut up for a minute–you’ve got some business to take care of! Starting with…>GRILL THE KILLER! YOU’VE GOT A FEW BONES TO PICK WITH HIM!>CHECK IN WITH GUS–EVERYTHING COOL WITH HIM?>TALK TO SANDY THE VENT URCHIN–HOW’D SHE GET HERE ANYWAYS?>CONVERSE WITH CAL AND TEDDY–THEY DOING OKAY?>CALL GOOD BOY–THEY’RE GONNA WANT TO HEAR ABOUT THIS!>CALL THAT SHITLORD BORIS–HE LEFT SOME OF HIS CRONIES BEHIND, APPARENTLY!>DEAL WITH THE SKULL–IT’S ABOUT TIME HE GOT A TASTE OF HIS OWN MEDICINE!>HIT THE ROAD–YOU’VE GOT PLACES TO BE!>WRITE-IN!
Got plans tonight, so let's pick this back up THURSDAY AROUND 10-11AM PST! Got a few errands to run in the afternoon, but should have time for a few updates. Hope to see you then!
>>5228960>>GRILL THE KILLER! YOU’VE GOT A FEW BONES TO PICK WITH HIM!>CALL THAT SHITLORD BORIS–HE LEFT SOME OF HIS CRONIES BEHIND, APPARENTLY!
>>5228960>GRILL THE KILLER! YOU’VE GOT A FEW BONES TO PICK WITH HIM!CALL GOOD BOY–THEY’RE GONNA WANT TO HEAR ABOUT THIS!>BUT FIRST ICECREAM, YOU DESEREVE A REWARD FOR BRAVING THE SEWERS!
>>5228960>GRILL THE KILLER! YOU’VE GOT A FEW BONES TO PICK WITH HIM!We can threaten to let Gus get a hold of him. That might get him to talk.>CALL GOOD BOY–THEY’RE GONNA WANT TO HEAR ABOUT THIS!>>5229278>BUT FIRST ICECREAM, YOU DESEREVE A REWARD FOR BRAVING THE SEWERS!And biiiig this. What is Stan's favorite flavor do you all reckon?
>>5229198>>5229278>>5229292THE TALLY:>GRILLER THE KILLER: 3!>CALL BORIS: 1!>CALL GOOD BOY: 2!>FUCKIN' ICE CREAM: 2!Lemme see if I can squeeze calling Good Boy, Ice Cream, and Talking to the Killer into one! Writing!
ICE CREAM, of course! You can barely concentrate with fatty over there eating so damn loud! Flipping you the bird with her sharp, but tiny claws, LIL’ STANLEY attacks Denise’s cone with even more gusto as you watch enviously! Did no one seriously think to get you one?!“We figured you’d get all pissy if we didn’t somehow guess your favorite flavor or whatever.” Talbot grunts, earning a series of nods from Eddie, Kiki, and Denise. Fair enough, you growl, but if someone doesn’t grab you a frozen treat in ONE UPDATE you’re gonna let this jackass go!“By all means,” Jed’s skull purrs, “take your time!”“C-can we get ice cream too?” Cal asks, voice still weak from whatever torture was inflicted on him by the killer. Sure, you nod, but if anyone touches your favorite flavor you’re gonna lose your SHIT!“Come on, everyone!” Shouts a one-eyed refugee with a rallying cry, “It won’t heal the mental or physical wounds, but I used to go here all the time… and this place uses REAL cream!” “I-I always wanted to try an ‘icy cream!’” Squeaks Sandy the Vent Urchin as the zombie-like horde of rescued hostages pushes her towards the ice cream parlor! “Is it like Vent Pizza?”Watching the crowd push and shove into the establishment like it was Black Friday, you turn to your so-called ‘friends’ and impatiently tap your nonexistent watch. WELL?!“ON IT!” Eddie shouts, voice positively dripping with ‘gogetterness’! Shoving his way through the crowd, he’s swiftly joined by Kiki and Talbot–-the latter chucking the people you just saved aside like candy wrappers!Now that that’s settled, you grin, you’ve got a few other things on your docket to take care of!“One of ‘em had better be ‘Call Good Boy.’” Art grumbles as he watches Syb scrub her boots clean with a sponge and industrial-grade bleach. MMm, smells nostalgic! And yea, you snarl, that is on the list! Don’t think you didn’t notice him, Tucker, Syb, and Denise not springing to grab you a treat, either!“Gee, can’t get anything past you, can I?” Art asks in a tone that you’re pretty sure is sarcastic. Whatever, man! Waving him off to tend to his, ech, GIRLfriend, you whip out your RADIO and hiss a few greetings into the receiver–does anyone read you!? ‘Towers are falling,’ or whatever!Stanley.” Replies a mechanical voice shortly after, “’Falling Glass Can Cut. I wasn’t expecting a report this soon–have you dispatched the final lieutenant?”HAH! One step at a time, sister!>CONTD.
>>5229720No, you reply, shaking your head at what you now know to be Christy’s voice, but you’ve got better news: remember those MISSING PEOPLE they were looking fo-“I’ll send a retrieval team immediately. What’s your location?” She interjects, excitement somehow registering through her text-to-speech program. CREAM DE LA CREAM, you reply, moving away from the small-scale riot forming outside the establishment. Does she know where that is? “I practically live there. Well, I used to before this all happened. Stanley, you have no idea how much this means.”You have a few guesses, you smirk, but why doesn’t she paint you a picture, huh? Are we talkin’ a raise here, or…?“Chief Blumenkrantz will be over the moon. Prepare yourself.” The other end of the radio goes quiet for a moment. “A team will head to your position with medical supplies and transport–ETA ten minutes.”Talk about speedy delivery! Where was that kind of hustle when you used to order take-out?“Did you discover what was behind the disappearances?” The voice continues. Yea, you reply, and you’ve got the smug bastard right here with you! Say hi, Jed!“This is only a setback.” He mutters from under your arm. “Enjoy your frozen treats while they last.”Hey, you frown, that’s no way to treat the person about to grab him a cone! Blinking in confusion, the skull looks at you with a mix of surprise and befuddlement.“Y-you’re getting me ice cream? Really?”HAH! No! Shoulda’ thought about that before trying to harvest my body parts, freak!“Yes, please don’t serve the culprit ice cream.” Christy adds as you stick your tongue out at the killer’s skull. “The team can take him into custody if…” The robotic voice pauses, “complications don’t occur. I trust you’ll make the right choice, Stanley.”You always do! Since you’ve got her on the line, you continue as you take a seat on a nearby barricade, some of these survivors belong to that shitheel BORIS’ squad–not that he cares, or whatever!“Noted.” Christy replies over the sound of a few keys being tapped. “That’s good news. Mr. Ponderosa’s team has been reporting significant amounts of MIA and KIA security personnel even before the assault on JOPLIN–glad to see some of them made it.”Makes sense, you scoff, Boris only cares about one thing in this world: he, himself, and HIM!“Then you’ll be happy to know that we’ve been reassigning most of his security personnel–we can’t reassign the members of Mr. Blacquiere’s organization, of course, but hopefully we’ll see far less casualties in the future.” HAH! Suck it, ‘CHOSEN ONE!’>CONTD.
>>5229722“Yes,” Christy agrees, “Now if only we could get OFFICER HENNIG to follow orders…”BEA, huh? You can imagine how she’d be tricky to corral. Your back is still sore from the last time she grabbed you!“Indeed–she cited ‘medical reasons’, but our files are remarkably thin on that subject. Makes things difficult, to say the least.”You frown–so what, she gets a free pass because she feels ‘sicky-wicky’? Puh-LEEZE! That’s the kind of laziness that’s ruining this country, you know!“I can’t say much due to privacy concerns,” Crackles the personal assistant’s robotic voice, “But I believe you and her share similar conditions, Stanley.”Wait, you stammer, nearly dropping the skull to the pavement, she has blackouts too?! A-and she has to get up and go pee, like, five times a night?!“No.” Replies the mechanized voice. “But I believe whatever it is comes from MAGICAL CONTAMINATION, hence her close proximity to Blacquiere and his associates.” You can almost hear a sigh on the other end of the radio. “In any case, Stanley, please exercise caution–the team should be there shortly, but the roads are still very far from being safe. Take care, now.”You respond with a friendly ‘cheerio’, but it’s too late–the line’s dead. Speaking of, the line in front of the ice cream shop, or mosh pit in this case, doesn’t seem to be getting any shorter, so instead you bring your trophy from the gallery over to a nearby park bench and set the skull down next to you. So, you begin, crossing one leg over another like your school counselor used to do, does he wanna talk about what happened back there? Things got a little heated, didn’t they?“... I suppose you’ve earned a question or two.” Jed spits, clearly still peeved about the ice cream joke. “And it will allow me to pick your brain as well… for when my time comes again.”Hey, if anyone’s gonna be picking brains around here, you retort, it’s you! … or Denise, since she’s a freakish science nerd. Or Syb–you’ve def woken up at her place a few times with electrodes on your head… In any case, you segue, you’ve got questions, damn it, and he’s gonna answer ‘em!“Fire away.” Jed replies, “Before your goons arrive, please.”>CONTD.
>>5229726You’ve got the killer, but what exactly do you ask? Do you even wanna hear from this guy? >WHY IS HE SO DEAD-SET ON YOU, ANYWAYS? YOU KNOW YOU’RE SPECIAL, BUT…>HOW DID HE CATCH SO MANY PEOPLE?>CAN HE TEACH YOU HOW TO MAKE TRAPS? PLEASE?>WHY DOES HE WANNA MAKE PEOPLE SCULPTURES ANYWAYS?>YOU FOUND HIS DIARY BACK AT THE ARCADE–BIT DIFFERENT FROM THE OLD DAYS, HUH?>HOW WAS HE ABLE TO ATTACH OTHER PIECES TO HIS BODY? HE’S JUST A NORMAL SKELETON!>HOW SHOULD YOU DEAL WITH HIM? HE’S THE EXPERT, AFTER ALL!>NEVER MIND, YOU’RE READY TO PASS JUDGMENT ONTO THIS KILLER!>WRITE-IN!
>>5229728>WHY IS HE SO DEAD-SET ON YOU, ANYWAYS? YOU KNOW YOU’RE SPECIAL, BUT…>HOW DID HE CATCH SO MANY PEOPLE?might know how we find mitzis family if he can tell us. Goodboy will question him about all the other stuff anyway we can ask about that later.
>>5229988>>5230024>>5230098>WHY'S HE SO DEAD-SET ON YOU ANYWAYS?>HOW DID HE CATCH SO MANY PEOPLE?Writing!>>5229988>Mitzi's familyBoris' team and a few others were the ones who were involved with the mission to the National Guard Outpost--that place was swarming with different skellies. Not trying to tell you what to ask, of course, just wanted to clarify!
>>5230237Boris' team and a few others were the ones who were involved with the mission to the National Guard Outpost--that place was swarming with different skellies. Not trying to tell you what to ask, of course, just wanted to clarify!Meant maybe we can find them if they’re alive by following his strategy.
You’ll leave the easy questions for the interrogation squad–right now you wanna cut straight to the meaty stuff! Clearing your throat as you and your benchmate watch the ex-hostages frolic about with ice cream, you ask Jed why he’s so dead-set on your parts anyways! You kinda get it, you add, pausing to touch a finger to your thigh and make a hissing sound, but, you wanna know the REAL reasons!“... I thought I made myself clear back in the gallery.” He snaps, clearly not enthused about repeating himself. Well clearly he didn’t, you snarl, because you totally forgot what he said! Plus you were, like, preocculized, or whatever, so spill the beans or you’ll get Gus to come over here!The skull locks eye sockets with the pizza delivery guy for a split second, and something about Gus’ dull, unyielding stare awakens something primal inside the killer’s skull–something that loosens his lips quite a bit!“Have you ever seen a butterfly emerge from its chrysalis, Stanley?” Jed asks as he searches your eyes for comprehension. No, you shrug, but you took care of silkworms back in Fourth Grade–that was kinda cool!“During its life cycle, a caterpillar undergoes a magnificent metamorphosis–a one-way transformation into a beautiful butterfly!” He explains with a glimmer of awe in his eye socket! “Does the caterpillar know what it will become? Is it truly the same creature that willingly encased itself in a chitinous tomb?”You dunno, you frown, but there’s, like, MeTube vids on that crap if he wants to find out. You asked him a different question, damn it!“You and the butterfly aren’t so different.” The skull replies in a matter-of-fact tone. “Anyone can see the power you wield–even the whispers in my skull can’t help but marvel at your growth…”You raise an eyebrow. Whispers?“Probably talkin’ about TIM.” Ly spits. “Not dat’ dis’ creep needed da’ motivation…”>CONTD.
>>5230325“The time will come, my dear, when you, like the caterpillar, or silkworm, in your case, will stand at a crossroads: when you arrive on a road paved from your enemies brimming with incalculable arcane power, which road will you take? Whichever path you choose, you’ll never find your way back…”Gotcha, you huff, you’re doing the whole ‘speaking in riddles’ thing. Hey GUS-“I COVETED that power!” The skull interjects just as Gus turns away from you! “I spent years trying to be noticed–to shake the very foundations of this miserable town! All to end up wasting away in a hole while the world moved on and my great works were forgotten!”You scoot away from the skull as his ranting grows angrier!“I am an ARTIST, damn it! Flesh is my clay and bone is my marble! I make the hideous beautiful! The meek powerful!And to see power such as yours stagnate… fester… WASTE away when I could use it to move mountains!”The killer’s fervor dies mid-sentence as a vacant stare forms on his face. “...And now… I’ll fade away again… like dust in the wind…”The atmosphere grows heavy between you two as you both go silent. Was that… was that a song lyric, or-“I made it up. It’s mine.”Alright, cool… so uh, you continue, desperately trying to change the subject, how exactly did he snare so many people anyways? Glancing between the killer and the hostages who made it out, you try not to sound too impressed when you say that that’s a LOT of people!“You sound impressed.” Jed remarks in a bemused tone.Damn it!“People, like that vermin swinging from a stick over there, are curious by nature. Even before my rebirth, I merely gave them something to be curious about.” He explains in a tone more suited for a director explaining his movie to someone. “I always likened it to fishing: a whiff of food, the glint of valuables, a suspicious noise down a dark alley–given the right ‘bait, an angler like myself can catch anything he wants, provided he has the time and patience to do so.”You bite your lip as the skull shoots you a sideways glance. Is… is it bad that you’re starting to totally get this guy?“Yes.” Ly replies, “Yes, and yer’ gonna go ta’ Hell, so stop it.”Alright, sheesh!>CONTD.
>>5230326As you contemplate what to ask the skull next, your ears perk up at the roar of motors in the distance–GOOD BOY SECURITY wheels, you hope!“For what it’s worth, Stanley, it’s been a pleasure getting to know you.” Jed remarks as he too hears the approaching team. “A shame I couldn’t immortalize you in my magnum opus.”Yea, well, you mutter, sheepishly scratching the back of your head, there’s always next time, right?“I suppose so.” The skull replies in a wistful tone. “Tell me: do you think they’ll destroy me?”Talk about a curveball! Tugging at your jumpsuit’s collar, you answer with a noncommittal ‘eeeh?’ “I suspected as much.” Jed sighs with a clack of his teeth. “Maybe this is how things are meant to be, hm? Or maybe it’s just another hurdle…”Well whatever it is, you snarl, his killing days are over, got it?! And if he even thinks of reassembling himself or whatever-“Then you’ll crush me like a soda can, I imagine.” The skull says with a rueful laugh. “But that wouldn’t be productive at all, now would it?”Maybe not, you reply with a cheshire grin on your face, but it’ll definitely help people sleep better, that’s for sure!“Perhaps, but you’d be dooming several more in the process.” You blink. Come again?“You didn’t think I kept all of my sculpting materials in one studio, did you?” Jed asks with mock surprise. “I imagine they’re all getting rather hungry by now behind those devilish traps of mine…”Snatching the skull off the bench, you glare daggers into the killer’s eye sockets–bullshit, you hiss! He’s full of it!“Maybe.” Jed replies with a shrug in his voice. “But if you kill me you’ll never know for sure… not really, at least. A predatory grin slowly makes its way onto his face. “And neither will those soldiers.”Letting the skull clatter back onto the bench, you get up and pace some of the irritation out as your conversation buddy cackles behind you. “Go ahead!” He croons, “Ask your questions! Eat your ice cream! Enjoy the ride while it lasts, my dear, because it won’t last forever!”Okay, you’ve gotta do something else now or you’re gonna FLIP. The question is, what?>ASK JED ANOTHER QUESTION!>GET JED TO COME CLEAN ABOUT THESE ‘OTHER STUDIOS’!>GO FIND YOUR GODDAMN ICE CREAM ALREADY!>CHECK IN WITH GUS–EVERYTHING COOL WITH HIM?>TALK TO SANDY THE VENT URCHIN–HOW’D SHE GET HERE ANYWAYS?>CONVERSE WITH CAL AND TEDDY–THEY DOING OKAY?>CALL THAT SHITLORD BORIS–HE’S GOT SOME QUESTIONS TO ANSWER!>CHAT UP SOMEONE ELSE ON THE TEAM! (WHO?)>WAIT FOR THE RESCUE TEAM TO ARRIVE!>WRITE-IN!
>>5230286Gotcha. Sorry, anon, my brain's been fried like an egg the whole damn day!Here's the deal, all--gonna be busy this weekend starting very early tomorrow, so I'll be calling it until MONDAY 11-12PM PST just to be on the safe side! Thank you so much for playing and for that sexy, SEXY patience of yours--should be able to hit the ground running after the weekend!In the meantime, on top of the choices above, >>5229292asked a decent question: what ice cream flavor would Stan like, you think? Feel free to write some suggestions in on top of your normal vote(s)!Seeya on Monday, hopefully, and have a great weekend!
>>5230327>GET JED TO COME CLEAN ABOUT THESE ‘OTHER STUDIOS’!Frankly, he'd better tell us, because when Blumenkrantz and Curt's boys get ahold of him, he's going to wish it was us interrogating him instead. They might be more lenient if he's already out with it before they come and pick him up.>given the right ‘bait, an angler like myself can catch anything he wantsSo if we go by this logic, the best way to find Mitzi's father and sister would be to give them some kind of bait they'd have to go for. I bet if they thought Mitzi herself was in danger they'd come out looking for her. Maybe we could set something up. Have a few of our skeleton buddies parade her around on top of a truck or something like she's been captured. Of course, this would also mean her dad would probably immediately open fire on them or something along those lines.On the other hand, maybe it'd be better if we played detective to figure it out. If he was at the Armory when this all started, and we know the Armo