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  • File : 1274743489.jpg-(18 KB, 314x277, dean1.jpg)
    18 KB STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)19:24 No.10032392  
    Gentlemen, I promised that I would deliver the continuing adventures of Saburo, Al'Sham Wyles, The Halfling and Joseph Knock.

    What Has Transpired:
    http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/8483458/
    http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/8881222/

    But first I have to explain a few things: we gathered, intending to play for five nights... but real life happens and were only able to clear about half of the content I had written up. Due to the fact that one of the players will be out of the country for the next two months, the earliest we can resume to continue the campaign is in August.

    However, I will tell you the tale of what has transpired thus far, and hopefully you will anticipate our next gathering as much as I do.
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)19:31 No.10032518
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    It Begins:

    The session began with the party exiting the ruined city of Camlann via boat. The boat had been laden with 23,000 gold pieces as a reward for the party's exploits, as well as several weapons that had been recovered. For Joseph Knock, he received the +2 shocking bow that was wielded by the henchmen of the now-deceased Goren Bosch. The Halfling similarly received a pair of +2 shocking daggers.

    The boat itself was a medium-sized sloop with two masts and two decks, crewed by Gregor and Estaad, who had previous sailing experience. To the tune of Mendelssohn's Hebrides Overture, the party left the burning city and began a three day journey to the twin cities of Echelon and Undermine, where Gregor reasoned they would be able to find allies and lie low while news of Camlann's destruction echoed across the land.

    The party proceeded to get to know more about each other, except for Joseph Knock. Knock had previously found a cause to believe in, and no sooner had he found this sense of purpose than it had been dashed into oblivion by the actions of his comrades. The death of Skelos had affected him deeply and shaken his faith in everything he came to believe in.

    The rest of the party, however, were happy with their successful work, and after trading stories, went to the galley for some food, whereupon they met Cookie, the galley chef.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)19:33 No.10032548
    fuck year, i just recently read the first instalment on the archive so this is like early christmas for me!

    type on, OP! type on!
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)19:34 No.10032553
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    >>10032518

    Cookie was a large, bald, and imposing figure, who immediately impressed the party by peeling and slicing a batch of potatoes with a simple metal spatula. He then cooked up the potatoes using the same spatula and served dinner for all. Gregor and Estaad announced that they would be working all hours on their three-day voyage to sail the ship, and everyone else decided to turn in for the night. However, upon going back to his room, The Halfling discovered Evennia (the girl they kidnapped in the last campaign) sleeping in his hammock. The Halfling calmly stole her golden bracelet, and made his way to the next room, leaving the door ajar.


    However, while everyone else was sleeping, Saburo was meditating upon the deck of the ship. As he meditated, he had one hand placed upon the sword, and I told him to roll a concentration check.

    He rolled moderately high, and as he was a psionic character, I told him that the sword was seemingly communicating empathically with him. As he held the sword, Saburo felt a great sense of power and justification, that he had committed righteousness by the sword. Feeling this, Saburo extracted the sword from the sheath, only to find that glowing red veins were growing through the metal sheen of the blade. A psychic shockwave was emitted by the blade, felt by all who were psionically aware; an action which disturbed Evennia from her sleep. She awoke to find the door ajar, and left the room to go to the upper deck.

    Sensing her approach, Saburo sheathed the glowing sword, and a short exchange occurred between him and Evennia. She had escaped her mafia captors and stowed away on the boat in order to follow Saburo, and though she was worried about the fate of her father, desired to be an adventurer as well. They both bid each other good night, and went back to sleep.
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)19:42 No.10032672
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    PART OF YOUR COMMENT ISN'T ALLOWED TO BE POSTED.

    DO I HAVE TO RETYPE EVERYTHING? I FUCKING TYPED IT IN WORD...
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)19:44 No.10032702
    >>10032672

    link to pastebin or something like that.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)19:44 No.10032712
    If an installment won't let itself be posted, put it up on pastebin and post a link in a post

    www.pastebin.org
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)19:46 No.10032739
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    >>10032702

    Defeatism I say!

    THIS POST BLOCKING SCOUNDREL SHALL BE DEFEATED WITHOUT RESORTING TO SUCH COWARDLY TACTICS!
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)19:48 No.10032753
    >>10032739
    I agree. This started on /tg/, it will stay on /tg/
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)19:49 No.10032762
    I believe in you OP, I wanna see more Al'Sham!
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)19:49 No.10032771
    Fuck, I think I figured it out, it's the ' and ". Brb replacing.
    >> Yelling Guy !YEllaNhDoY 05/24/10(Mon)19:50 No.10032778
    beer storblydine, ahluboo. <3
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)19:50 No.10032785
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    >>10032753
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)19:54 No.10032847
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    >>10032553

    The next morning, Al'Sham and The Halfling awoke and attempted to mess with Cookie. Al'Sham requested eggs, to which Cookie responded by taking three eggs, cracked them using only a spatula, then grilled and served the eggs. The Halfling requested an egg sandwich. Cookie took two slices of bread in both hands and put a raw egg (still in the shell) between them. He clapped his hands together, and when he separated them, the egg between was perfectly scrambled, unshelled, and cooked.

    Al'Sham then ventured to Joseph Knock's room, from which Knock had not emerged since they got on the boat. Upon entering, he saw Knock's bow hung up on the wall, along with several other pieces of equipment, as Knock himself sulked in the corner. At first, Al'Sham's invitations for Knock to join the rest of them were met with silence, at which point Al'Sham left... and then the Halfling entered. After about five minutes of silence between the Halfling and Knock, the Halfling grinned and exited the room, leaving the door ajar.

    Seeing as Cookie was now the most interesting person on the boat, Al'Sham decided to start fishing to catch some dinner. He threw a line over the boat, and caught a fish. He then presented the fish to Cookie and asked him if he wanted to catch a bunch of fish for dinner. Now, Cookie happens to be completely mute, and communicates mainly by glaring menacingly at people. When he actually desires to convey a thought, he blows smoke through his pipe that take the shape of written words.

    Cookie is unimpressed by Al'Sham's fish, and takes the fish from him. He scales the fish with two deft strokes of his trusty spatula, and begins to fillet the fish (again, using only his spatula). Despite the protests of Al'Sham, Cookie begins to grill the fish, put it on a plate, and eat it in front of Al'Sham. Cookie then points out a barrel of live fish that will be tonight's dinner. Al'Sham then storms off.
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)19:56 No.10032865
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    >>10032847

    While this was all happening, Saburo was practicing his sword technique on the upper deck. Fast forward to dinner that night, Joseph Knock finally decides to join up with the rest of the group, and exclaims that he no longer has anything left to believe in, and no longer has a sense of purpose in life.

    Al'Sham triumphantly exclaims "Believe only in what your arrows strike. That is the most real thing of all." This simple statement completely brings Knock out of his funk and he seems to be himself again.
    Now, after dinner, Knock goes back to his chambers, while the Halfling, Al'Sham, and Saburo converse on the upper deck. The sword once again begins to call out to Saburo, and he partially unsheathes it to see if it's still doing the veiny-glowy thing, and it is. The Halfling fails to see the effect, but Al'Sham notices it, and immediately starts asking questions about it.

    However, this is interrupted by the Halfling hearing a strange song-like sound coming from the waters outside the boat (I play the intro to Tunak Tunak Tun). It is dark out, and even in the moonlight, nothing can be seen. Several minutes later, the sound is heard again, this time by everyone, and it seems to be coming in from all directions around the boat.

    A quick spot check by all reveals that Gregor and Estaad seem to be asleep in the ship's rigging above them, and four orbs of light are circling the ship. Each orb is a different color-red, blue, green, and white. The orbs rotate around each other and crash to the deck of the ship with a thunderous sound. As they do so, they take the form of four ornately dressed humanoid shapes: the red one is aflame, the green one looks crystalline, the blue one appears surrounded by water, and the white one has gusts of air blowing around him.

    Roll initiative.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)19:56 No.10032877
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    I WAS USING DEAN BEFORE IT WAS COOL DAMNIT!

    Also it's great to see you back, can't wait to see how this turns out.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)19:57 No.10032890
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    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)19:58 No.10032896
    >>10032392
    Fuck yes storytiem, you are the best tiem ever!
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)19:58 No.10032900
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    >>10032865

    The wispy white elemental begins spinning in place quite fast. Arcs of white lightning stretch from him to the other elementals, and they begin to glow with a faint white aura. While the white elemental is spinning, I play the song "Tunak Tunak Tun". This action buffs the other elementals as they engage the party in combat. Joseph Knock hears the commotion and reemerges, firing arrows as he does so. The party discovers that attacking the spinning, dancing elemental interrupts their song and ends the buffing effect, so they make good use of this tactic to fight their foes smartly. Saburo discovers that his Muramasa blade cannot cut the elementals, and instead uses his secondary weapon, a bastard sword.
    The white elemental's song buffs the movement speed of the other elementals by 20 feet, and awards an extra attack if the elemental moved at least 20 feet during the round.

    The green elemental's song grants +4 AC, Spell Resist 9, and a +3 morale bonus to all saving throws.
    The fire elemental's song grants all attacks an extra 2d6 fire damage, and deals 1d6 damage to anyone who strikes an elemental in melee.
    The blue elemental's song heals an elemental for 1d8 on the beginning of their turn.

    A few rounds later, the party has downed the elementals, who upon being defeated, each return to a colored orb that rotates above the deck. Once all were vanquished, the orbs circled each other, and combined into a single, golden orb, which again, crashed down to the deck in humanoid form. It bore a similarity to the elementals they had just encountered, albeit with a golden aura; however, instead of fighting, it addressed Saburo:
    "We are four as one, bound by force, forged together, and are now one with him. We are that which was taken and have been ensconced within the blade which rests at your side."
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)20:00 No.10032926
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    >>10032900

    Saburo unsheathes the Muramasa blade, which is glowing like the freakin' sun; and stabs it into the deck, where it rests in front of him. An exchange takes place between the golden elemental and the party, in which it is determined that Saburo's blade was indeed forged by Muramasa, a being who lies imprisoned in the astral plane, between heaven and hell. Muramasa is tasked to forge weapons and armor for all eternity, as punishment for his role in a planar war.

    The sword that is now possessed by Saburo has a long, bloody history, which traces back thousands of years. It began with the commissioning of a sword from Muramasa by a Githyanki warlord. The warlord promised Muramasa his freedom in exchange for sword beyond peer, to wage war upon his enemies. Muramasa, anticipating a betrayal, decided to ensure that his freedom would be granted regardless of the Githyanki's actions, and requested that four primal elements be taken from each elemental plane in order to forge the sword. The Gith fulfilled his request, and in doing so, angered the spirits of each elemental plane. Muramasa then forged the sword, and imbued it with a piece of his own soul, so that every time the sword drew blood, Muramasa's soul would gain strength, and eventually be able to manifest itself through the sword and free him from his eternal torment.

    However, the Gith were set upon by the angered elemental spirits. With his dying action, the githyanki warlord opened a portal to the prime material, and sent the sword through, to be lost forever. However, the sword was discovered by mortals, and changed hands over the course of thousands of years, becoming the treasured artifact of a large civilization; and was paid to the empire of Camlann as tribute. The sword was then intercepted by the mafia, and rewarded to Saburo for his services.
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)20:01 No.10032934
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    >>10032926

    After telling Saburo the history of the sword, the elemental spirit exclaims that his actions have reawakened the sword, sending psionic shockwaves throughout the planes, and it is only a matter of time before the Gith pick up on the signal and track it here. He tells the party that they shall find the answers they seek at their current destination, and that all will be revealed in due course, but issues a final word of warning:

    Chaos and destruction are the company of those that wield a blade forged by Muramasa.

    The elemental then dissipates and enters into Saburo's sword, which stops glowing and lies dormant upon the ship's deck. The party now knows the gravity of the situation and scale of the challenges they must face. They rouse Gregor and Estaad from sleep, and contemplate the words of the elemental as they proceed towards the Vertical Cities.

    After some more sailing, the party finally comes into view of the vertical cities of Echelon and Undermine. At the base of a large cliff, a large beachhead extends out to the ocean, covered entirely by foundries, metal workshops, factories, storehouses, dockhouses, and all kinds of housing and industrial construction. Further back, on top of the cliff's edge, four large cranes are visible, with more structures apparent behind them. At the base of the cliff, beyond the Portland area, three large portcullis structures appear to have been built leading into the cliff face itself.
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)20:03 No.10032964
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    >>10032934

    As the boat pulls into port, the party notices a great number of large, metallic humanoid shapes moving about on the docks. They are carrying boxes, pulling carts, lifting loads, and plodding around. As the party exits the boat and moves dockside to explore the area, they notice that the metallic men are indeed constructs, and there are very few humans in the area. The Portland area is covered in a smog-like haze, and metalworking fumes permeate the air. Saburo, who is psionically focused, becomes aware of a hum in the air that nobody else can hear. The hum is not loud to him, but it is annoying, and he suppresses it through concentration.

    Al'Sham decides to attempt asking the locals for some information, and proceeds to a nearby door and knocks on it. A man wearing a blacksmith's smock answers the door, he reeks of alcohol. Al'Sham asks a few questions, to which the man responds by rudely telling Al'Sham to leave unless he has any business to conduct. Al'Sham then goes to the next door, and a woman answers, holding the door slightly ajar with a chain latch. After a few questions, she too dismisses Al'Sham, saying "People only come here for one thing, and if you're not buying, you need to leave."

    Gregor then tells the party that he remembers the location of the hideout used by the Veylark Brotherhood in this city, and sends the party there. Al'Sham takes care to disguise everyone first; he dresses the Halfling in a large beard and dwarf clothing, and the rest of the party in the manner typical of the people he has seen walking around town. The Hideout is located a distance away from a large tavern, tucked in an alley behind several foundries and warehouses. The party proceeds there with Estaad, and upon finding the hidden entrance to the hideout, enter it to find that it is completely deserted.
    >> TORYSTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)20:04 No.10032979
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    And then they all died.

    The End.
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)20:04 No.10032986
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    >>10032964

    Panic overtakes Estaad, as he exclaims that there is always supposed to be one brother in the hideout at all times, and the ransacked hideout looks as if it has been deserted for a number of years. A search of the place reveals empty vessels of alcohol, various other unknown substances, and a bunch of destroyed furniture. Estaad finds an address within a dusty ledger, written in the Veylarks' coded cipher, and excitedly exclaims that they will be able to find their brothers at this location (1240 Gorgon Street in Undermine).

    So the party ventures into Undermine through one of the portcullis gates at the base of the cliff. I queue the opening theme of Metropolis as they enter a seedy, dimly lit market square. The people around all seem to be wearing raggedy clothing, and large magically lit neon-colored signs adorn the entrances of many shops and stands around the square. The structures all look black, sooty, and run-down; with some of the more well-kept buildings being guarded by stone-faced bouncers. People take little notice of the party, until they see The Halfling (who is disguised as a dwarf) and are struck with fearful reverence upon seeing him. Anyone who crosses the path of the party makes great haste to avoid the Hafling.

    The party navigates their way to 1240 Gorgon Street, and the scenery only seems to get more and more impoverished and dilapidated. A distinct metallic smell lingers in the air, which also contains hints of booze and garbage. Homeless people are strewn about the streets and alleyways in sick array, and the group finally arrives at their destination. It appears to be a nondescript house, no lights are on, and the door has been completely removed from the threshold.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)20:06 No.10032998
    >I play the intro to Tunak Tunak Tun
    I spat my beer out. I have no idea why but that just hit me in the funny buttonm
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)20:08 No.10033027
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    >>10032979
    Yep. Party falls, rocks die.

    >>10032986

    The party enters the building cautiously, and it appears to be in even worse shape than the old hideout. Not only does this building appear to be ransacked, but an entire wall has been crashed through. Trash litters the first floor. A stairway leading to the basement is discovered, and the party heads downstairs... only to hear signs of activity coming from below.

    It sounds as if someone is down there, signing in a soft voice. The Halfling rolls to hide, Al'Sham casts invisibility, Saburo moves silently, and Knock keeps watch at the top of the stairs.

    But Estaad, who is panicking again, runs down the stairs with reckless abandon. As he enters the basement, he sees an elderly, decrepit man holding a lantern. He is singing to himself softly, and drawing pictures of birds (larks) with a charcoal stick on the wall by lantern light. Bottles of alcohol and packages of a gray substance litter the floor, the room smells strongly metallic.

    The party confronts the crazy old man, inquiring of his identity. The man babbles to himself and holds a lantern to the opposite wall, on which is written the name: Sesrin. He exclaims "AH YES, that is my name," then puts a finger to his lips and says "SHHHHH, they're listening!" Estaad recognizes the symbol of the Veylark Brotherhood on the man's belt, and despairs that this crazy old man must be all that remains of the brothers in this city.
    >> TORYSTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)20:08 No.10033033
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    >>10032986
    They slowly made their way into the deserted building, as they stepped into the darkness the party was becosted by a grue which instantly severed Saburo's jugular. It moved onto the rest of the group and in a single round obliterated the party.

    Everyone died. The end.
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)20:10 No.10033062
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    >>10033027

    Just then, the sound of running footsteps is heard coming from above, and the party hears someone calling to them "Don't hurt him! Don't hurt him!" A man comes down the stairs, to which Sesrin responds "Dinnertime dinnertime! Did you bring me my dinner?" The man stares at Estaad and Saburo, confused as to why there are only two people when he saw five enter the building (Knock and the Halfling are hidden, Al'Sham is invisible), and guesses that they may be Veylarks. The man introduces himself as Ordrin Fest, a former member of the Veylark Brotherhood, and explains that Sesrin is all that is left of their order. Estaad looks shattered, and the rest of the party comes out of hiding. They engage Ordrin in conversation, and Ordrin seems quite visibly shaken or addled in some way, as he struggles to remember the exact sequence of events which led to the fall of the Brotherhood in the city. He manages to stammer out that the hideouts have been deserted for at least four years and that he has taken care of Sesrin in that time.

    The Veylarks in undermine had met with crushing economic and civil strife due to the onset of the Automatons. With the development of these artificial constructs, a vast amount of workers were displaced from their jobs, and forced into abject poverty. There was no fighting the machine, and even the spirits of the revolutionary Veylarks were broken. If they could no longer care for their families, what hope would they have of toppling the corrupt government? The Veylarks slowly dwindled into nothingness, falling to the sway of narcotics (mainly a grey powdery substance called Kerrathil), booze, and prostitution; vices that were regulated by the six dwarves which assumed power in Undermine.

    However, this is all cloudy to Ordrin's terrible memory, and he only gives the party a vague idea of what has transpired.

    The party takes their leave of this broken man and his insane friend and head back to the boat.
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)20:13 No.10033089
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    >>10033033

    Just then they were resurrected in a duplicate city in exactly the same situation they were in, sans grue.

    >>10033062

    Upon returning to the boat, Gregor informs them that a message, addressed to them, has been delivered, the contents of which read: "Lift Station Alpha, 10 AM tomorrow. My associate will meet you there. ~M.B.~ PS-- Mind the Owl"

    The party retires for the night, and proceeds to the Lift Station the following day, in more elaborate disguises; although the Halfling is still dressed as a dwarf. As they pass a bunch of bums in a square, the Halfling decides to crack one over the head with his cane. The bum is roused violently, but as soon as he sees the dwarven-disguised Halfling, he backs away, muttering "Blessings of Moradin be upon you good sir." The other bums repeat this gesture.

    They encounter the fifth player character (who up until this point was building her character). Their contact introduces himself as Edgar Pomponne. He is dressed (fabulously) in the style of a musketeer, possessing a belt teeming with gadgets, with a small mechanical owl perched upon his shoulder. Edgar introduces himself to the party, stating that he has been instructed to deliver them to his employer. Edgar is an apprentice artificer and a student of the Magisterium Arcane Academy, and his employer has been sponsoring his studies.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)20:13 No.10033095
    KEEPING THIS MOTHERFUCKER BUMPED
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)20:16 No.10033148
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    >>10033089
    (pic related is what Edgar looks like)

    The players now board a lift bound for the upper city, and enter an entirely new world. Instead of the gloomy shadows of Undermine, a dazzling pavilion of white marble and ornate architecture await them as they exit the lift, now in Echelon. The people here are considerably better dressed, and polished Automatons walk the streets, going about their business. Edgar explains a bit more about the nature of the automatons, in that they receive psychic signals from a large structure called the Beacon (the source of the hum that is audible only to Saburo). The Halfling notices that where people were reverent and fearful of his dwarven guise in Undermine, people seemed more disgusted of him in Echelon.

    Edgar leads the party to a lavish restaurant, constructed in the style of an ancient Greek temple, called Blue Brook. The group is then taken to a private dining room reserved for Edgar's employer. The party enters the room and sees a man, dressed in white, with a wide-brimmed white fedora staring out the window overlooking the city. A large round table is before them, set with all their places. The man introduces himself: "Greetings, friends. Allow me to introduce myself: I am Lord Maxwell Bartholdy, and I am indeed quite impressed with your work."

    Bartholdy introduces himself as a powerful, wealthy aristocrat in this city. He has many contacts throughout the empire and it is through his information network that he has learned about the fall of Camlann and the exploits of the party. He exclaims that this room has been soundproofed entirely, and that he wishes to employ the group for his own desires. He is power-hungry and ambitious, and seeks to become the governor o f Echelon, a position currently held by a certain man named Kouris Lecht.
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)20:17 No.10033166
    >>10033148
    Whoops, that's not pic related. I'll be posting pic related once I get a better quality version of the original picture she drew in a few minutes.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)20:18 No.10033170
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    >storytiem continues his epic

    YES!!!
    >> TORYSTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)20:19 No.10033191
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    >>10033148
    But little did the party know that Kouris Lecht was hiding in the shadows. As soon as he heard the details of the conspiracy with his own ears he unleashed the thermonuclear device hidden within his trousers. Undermountain was destroyed in a holocaust of heat and radiation.

    The End.
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)20:20 No.10033199
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    >>10033148


    Bartholdy introduces himself as a powerful, wealthy aristocrat in this city. He has many contacts throughout the empire and it is through his information network that he has learned about the fall of Camlann and the exploits of the party. He exclaims that this room has been soundproofed entirely, and that he wishes to employ the group for his own desires. He is power-hungry and ambitious, and seeks to become the governor o f Echelon, a position currently held by a certain man named Kouris Lecht.

    Bartholdy bequeaths to the party that the mining operations in Undermine are what earn the city it's true wealth, as a revolutionary new substance has been discovered within certain strata of ore. When refined, the substance becomes a metallic liquid called Lethe. Lethe, while similar to mercury, is powerful because it responds to psychic stimulus. Lethe is the key to the construction of Automatons, and in order to control the city, one must control the mines.

    However, the mines are currently under the jurisdiction of the six Dwarven "Pimp-Kings" of Undermine, who rule the city with an army of thugs, prostitutes, ale-houses, narcotics rings, and the barbaric Blood Bowl. The Dwarves work the citizens to death in the mines, pay them a meager salary, and then recover their losses as the masses spend their pay right back into the pockets of the dwarves.

    Bartholdy exclaims that in return for helping him achieve power in both cities, he will reward the party with "their greatest desire." For Al'Sham, the city will become a stage upon which to perform the greatest illusion of all; for the Halfling, as much chaos as he can possibly cause; and as for the rest, he will think of something in due time (a hefty sum of gold shall be paid as well). However, the key to this plan lies in... The Halfling.
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)20:21 No.10033223
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    >>10033191

    Shouldn't you be using the Hogarth images if you want to troll?
    >> TORYSTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)20:22 No.10033236
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    >>10033223
    I don't have any :<
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)20:22 No.10033239
    >>10033089
    Moradin? Well that makes sense. He must be the place's chief diety.
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)20:24 No.10033285
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    >>10033199
    <-- Edgar looks like this.

    As the Halfling is the only person who is able to pull off a reasonable dwarven disguise, Bartholdy suggests that they must create a dwarven persona for him, one with which to rival and confront the six pimp-kings of the undercity, and the greatest among them. With this disguise, the group will have the legitimacy required to challenge the teams belonging to the other dwarves to a game of Blood Bowl, which will be heavily rigged and promoted behind the scenes by Bartholdy himself. By causing an upset in the gambling rings of the Blood Bowl, they can turn the public against the dwarves and win a fair bit of money for themselves.

    Suddenly, Bartholdy's pocketwatch issues a hum, and he motions for the soundproofed door to open. An exasperated waiter is standing there, and informs Bartholdy that his presence is required at the Citadel for an emergency meeting of parliament assembly. Bartholdy exclaims to the party, "Gentlemen, I do believe word of your exploits has reached our shores."

    Bartholdy then invites the party to join him as they go to the Citadel, and they can bear witness to the actions of the assembly from his private box. As they board his carriage, they notice mounted police dispersing crowds of worried looking civilians. Saburo notices that the psychic hum has gone silent, and indeed, all Automatons seem to be stationary and deactivated. The carriage enters the gates of the Citadel, and the party falls in behind Bartholdy and his bodyguards, as they proceed to Bartholdy's private box.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)20:26 No.10033308
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    >>10033199
    >However, the mines are currently under the jurisdiction of the six Dwarven "Pimp-Kings" of Undermine
    >six Dwarven "Pimp-Kings" of Undermine
    >Dwarven "Pimp-Kings"

    wat

    >>10033285
    He looks SPIFFY!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)20:27 No.10033324
    Who is "dean"?
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)20:27 No.10033332
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    >>10033285

    They overhear the masses of the assembly murmuring and whispering about war, unsure exactly what kind of tragedy befell the home city of Camlann, and they fear for their own safety. A man addresses the assembly from a podium, and he is identified as Governor Kouris Lecht. After he says a few words, Bartholdy asks for permission to speak, and addresses the assembly from his private box. Bartholdy moves that military forces must be mobilized to aid the home city of Camlann in this time of need. Saburo requests permission to address the parliament, and Bartholdy introduces him as one who bore witness to the events that befell Camlann.

    (Now, I should say that we've all been doing a fair bit of drinking at this point...and it begins to show.) Saburo attempts to make an empathic speech to motivate the assembly to pursue self interest and self preservation above all else. Upon the realization that this is counterproductive to the argument that Bartholdy was making, Saburo instead claims that the tragedies that befell Camlann were internal and they require assistance from those as illustrious as the assembly before him. Bartholdy finishes by stating that people are dying in Camlann, and need assistance immediately.

    In this way, military forces will begin mobilizing for Camlann, and the party leaves to usurp control of Undermine from the dwarves. Bartholdy gives Edgar a pocketwatch, which when set to a time of 6:45, will open up a two-way channel with Bartholdy himself.
    The party exits the citadel and heads towards the nearest lift station. Crowds have gathered in the streets, having heard the news of Camlann's destruction, and military police are directing them to maintain order. It is now that the party hatches their most brilliant and insane plan yet.

    "Guys," Al'Sham proclaims to everyone, "We're going to start our own religion."
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)20:27 No.10033333
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    >>10033324
    Pic Related
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)20:28 No.10033349
    >>10033324

    He's the guy from the Iron Giant.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)20:29 No.10033374
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    >"Guys," Al'Sham proclaims to everyone, "We're going to start our own religion."

    BRACING FOR EPIC
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)20:31 No.10033408
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    >>10033332

    By disguising The Halfling as a dwarven prophet, the party plans to lure in a bunch of destitute citizens of Undermine with promises of food and... other things I'm sure. The Halfling chooses the name D.B. as the identity of his new persona (D.B. stands for Douchebeard, his own design). By converting people to their religion, they hope to draw people away from the dwarves. Saburo is a bit more realistic, as he is skeptical that a bunch of addicts would convert to a religion strictly based on philosophy.

    A middle ground is reached. They will obtain as much as much Kerrathil (the drug of choice) as they can get, and put it in a bunch of ceremonially consecrated food; this will get the people to believe their cause.
    Wow, we're really pushing into some dark shit here.

    At any rate, the party proceeds down to Undercity, where demonstrations and police action are many times more drastic than the displays in Echelon. The police are chasing people down, beating them in the streets, and it's general chaos throughout. Suddenly it dawns upon the party that if a bunch of refugees have arrived from Camlann and spread the news of the city's destruction, then their boat will have come under suspicion, having arrived a day earlier. Al'Sham disguises himself as a police officer, and they dash through the chaos, to the docks. Al'Sham talks his way through some police barricades, and they return to the boat, only to find it completely deserted. However, as they open the hatches leading to the hold, they find three slain police officers, one of whom has a spatula embedded in his forehead.

    They recover the spatula, and place their stores of gold in bags of holding. They covertly toss the bodies of the policemen into the harbor, and they sink due to their armor. Assuming that Gregor, Estaad, Evennia, and Cookie went to the deserted Veylark hideout, the group makes its way there and meets up with them.
    >> TORYSTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)20:31 No.10033415
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    "Guys," Al'Sham proclaims to everyone, "We're going to start our own religion."

    He looked upon the group with enthusiasm but he did not realise the sheer gravity of what he had just said. The heavens parted (which nobody could see because they were in a mountain) and the gods looked down upon Al'Sham (who they could see because they're gods).

    With a roar of contempt the gods detonated the aforementioned trouser-based thermonuclear device destroying Undermountain once again.

    The End.
    >> Eponymous Rex !!taqDd9490Ip 05/24/10(Mon)20:33 No.10033452
    I'm gonna have to write up some logs about my current group's exploits.
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)20:37 No.10033498
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    >>10033408

    Along the way, Edgar imbues the spatula with Corrosive Touch, in case they have to fight any automatons (Ha ha...good foresight, but not quite yet!). As they reach the alley where their hideout is located, Saburo becomes aware of the psychic hum returning, and a signal is broadcast. Nearby Automatons spring to life, and begin plodding about; and suddenly start emitting the following message: "THIS IS GOVERNOR KOURIS LECHT. A STATE OF MARTIAL LAW HAS BEEN DECLARED. PROCEED TOWARDS YOUR PLACE OF RESIDENCES AND COMPLY WITH ALL POLICE ACTION." The party avoids the Automatons and heads to the hideout.

    They regroup and explain themselves to their Veylark allies. Edgar returns the infused spatula to Cookie, who is now furious that everything he attempts to cook with it begins to rust.

    After some deliberation, Saburo, Al'Sham, and Joseph Knock decide that the cover of martial law would be the perfect chance to seize a whole bunch of Kerrathil stockpiles... while disguised as police officers.

    Al'Sham gets to work disguising the three as police officers, while the Halfling and Edgar stay back at the hideout to plan the details of the religion and help Cookie prepare food for the coming masses.

    Al'Sham, Saburo, and Knock all manage to sneak into Undermine before the portcullis gates close, and talk their way past several guard patrols. They know that Kerrathil is commonly obtained through certain dwarf-owned buildings called "Halfway Houses", named because everything is half off. These storefronts function as pawn shops for both legal and illegal goods.

    Completely redefining the good/bad cop dynamic, the three get to work on recovering some drugs.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)20:38 No.10033519
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    >>10033415

    How about you shut the fuck up during storytime.
    >> TORYSTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)20:39 No.10033536
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    >>10033519
    SUDDENLY A THERMONUCLEAR TROUSER BOM... okay your right this is dumb. I'll shut up and listen to the story.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)20:43 No.10033605
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    >>10033519
    And a damn good story it is!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)20:46 No.10033650
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    DAMNIT STORY MAN I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENED WITH THE DRUGS
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)20:49 No.10033689
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    HE TAUNTS US WITH SUSPENSE!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)20:49 No.10033694
    Wait is OP having to write this all up from scratch or what? Do you think he died? I hope he didn't die.
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)20:53 No.10033745
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    >>10033498
    Undermine appears completely deserted, as the governor's martial law message blares in the distance. There are no signs of people, dwarves, thugs, or automatons anywhere. The magical lighting has been turned off, and every building looks dark and nondescript. Remembering the layout of things from earlier, Saburo recalls that a nearby building was lit up as a "Halfway House" earlier. They proceed to knock on the door, "POLICE INSPECTION, OPEN THE FUCK UP." A small slot opens on the door, and a man's voice is heard: "This ain't your territory, we got protection from Stone Silkey, if he hears about this..."

    "Wrong answer." Saburo unsheathes the sword, and carves the door off it's hinges. As the door falls out, the man staggers backward and shits himself; two other men are seen behind the counter. The sword begins glowing red with veins, once again, and Saburo hears very clearly within his mind: "SLAY THEM, PIERCE THEM". Before Saburo can act though, Joseph Knock runs forward with an arrow drawn, and fires into the man's leg. Al'Sham then comes in with the good cop act, and attempts to reason with the three men in the shop, saying that any further action will end their deaths. Saburo and Al'Sham use some bags of holding to put away a good ten kilos of Kerrathil, while Knock keeps an arrow trained at the downed man. They ask for directions to the nearest other Halfway House, and make their exit.
    >> TORYSTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)20:54 No.10033769
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    >>10033745
    Oh thank god, I thought "I" was going to have to finish the story off.
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)20:59 No.10033828
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    >>10033745

    The next Halfway House isn't as clean. As our three adventurers head to the door, Al'Sham shouts "POLICE INSPECTION, OPEN THE FUCKING DOOR". A cry of "FUCK YOU, PIG!" is heard from behind it, and an explosion blows out the door and knocks Saburo and Al'Sham back. Al'Sham lands prone, but Saburo does not. This time, Saburo grabs his sword, rushes forward, and cleaves the nearest enemy in half. As his sword passes through the man, blood begins to spray out, but then stops in mid-air and hangs suspended. The red veins begin to grow across Saburo's sword, and all the blood spilled from the wound enters the sword, and gets absorbed. Maniacal laughter fills Saburo's mind, and four other men in the room meet the same fate. The group makes off with even more Kerrathil, and proceeds to hit up two more halfway houses in the same manner.

    Saburo, Al'Sham, and Knock make their way out of Undermine and back to the hideout, packing about sixty kilos of Kerrathil between them. They spread it out on the floor and open up a package. It is a gray, powdery substance that smells strongly metallic.

    By now, the plan for the religious ceremony has been realized: Cookie will prepare a bunch of food, drugged with Kerrathil, and the party will go out into Undermine, preaching peace, love, and free food, as long as you attend a meeting at a deserted warehouse in Portland. Then, Al'Sham will cast invisibility on the table of food and create a duplicate illusory table, as the food will not be real unless you believe! He will speak to the masses as a prophet of D.B., and since they emptied the halfway houses of their supplies of Kerrathil, the people will all be suffering withdrawal from the drug (ITS GENIUS).

    At the conclusion of the ceremony, the people will eat the drugged food and trip balls, thinking that they've found something to cure their addiction, which is actually just food spiked with crazy sauce.

    Praise the lord.
    >> Gelatinous Rube 05/24/10(Mon)21:01 No.10033854
    >>10033689
    Oh lawd, is dat some minnie the moocher
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)21:02 No.10033873
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    >>10033854
    Looks like nightmare fuel to me
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)21:04 No.10033907
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    <- MY FACE WHEN I SAW A STORYTIEM THREAD ON THE FRONT PAGE.

    YOU HAVE MY FULL AND UNDIVIDED ATTENTION, SIR.
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)21:05 No.10033909
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    >>10033828

    Now, during the next day, as martial law lifts; the party all goes out into Undermine, dressed in long flowing robes, speaking like ascetics, and proclaiming the message of D.B. They promise free food to the masses, which resonates more than anything else that they could say, and notice that the thugs are out in force due to last night's police crackdowns.

    People are speaking of retaliation by the Dwarves against the police for the seizure of kerrathil (the stuff is not illegal in Undermine), and are fearful of the Dwarves' thugs walking the streets.

    Regardless, the group heads back to an empty warehouse to prepare for the religious ceremony. They scrounge up benches, pews, and makeshift seats from the surrounding area, and lay their food table out. The illusory table is easily visible by the seats, but the invisible table is located some distance away.

    A crowd of bums and destitute people show up, but as soon as they get let in to the building, they all rush the food table... and discover that they can't touch it or interact with it at all. Al'Sham exclaims that nobody will get to eat unless they believe, and invites them all to sit.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)21:05 No.10033916
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    >my face when I saw this thread on page 3
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)21:06 No.10033933
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    >>10033909

    Al'Sham begins a speech:

    "Look to your left, look to your right. Look at each other. Look into the face of your neighbor, your coworker. Look at your friends.
    Times are hard, and the proof is in your eyes. You see it every day. The dwarves pay you in peanuts and take it from you with overpriced goods and trinkets. The law casts you aside as lawbreakers, malcontents, and riffraff. The cliffsiders decide that fancy hats and sweet meats are more important than lending their fellow man and woman a helping hand!
    Under such stresses, its easy to see how things get to where they are. There is no trust anymore. There is no warmth in our houses or peace in our hearts. We are dying, and our murderer is decay! The sin and gloom in our minds and spirits stands in the way of our strength!

    Our community stands today, weakened as it is by the parasites of our day. But we must remember that we, stand together. We are the ones who can take back our lives, our streets, our pride! We have a home, and from this day forward, we begin the work to renew ourselves, and each other.

    Let this gathering today symbolize a new bond, stronger than any shackle and mightier than any sword! Let faith and clarity wash over you. Let a new life begin for each of you.
    Welcome to the Family. Let the fire be warm, always."
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)21:12 No.10034015
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    >>10033933

    The crowd is on the verge of tears. Al'Sham dismisses the illusory table, and points to the real one. "Now, my brothers and sisters, you may partake."

    They rush the table again, except this time they can interact with the food. The people are instantly amazed and all begin shouting and praising whatever-it-is that Al'Sham was preaching. Some go up and hug him, and they all smell like urinal cakes, but they're all on board with D.B. and his crazy religion.

    After the ceremony, Al'Sham exclaims that the seed has been planted. Once they start spreading the word throughout the city, their influence will grow among the people, and D.B. will be respected more than any dwarf.

    So the party now has one last piece to take care of: instigating a Blood Bowl match with the reigning champion team. Some quick gather information checks lead them to a tavern which is frequented by Gangstrom, one of the Dwarven Pimp-Kings, who owns the champion Blood Bowl team.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)21:17 No.10034088
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    >Gangstrom, one of the Dwarven Pimp-Kings

    I will NEVER get over this
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)21:18 No.10034102
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    >>10034015

    They decide to wait until nightfall and head to the tavern. Al'Sham chooses not to disguise anyone this time, except for the Halfling, whom he dresses as his persona of D.B. once more. As they head through Undermine, they come across a number of bums that previously attended the ceremony, who are preaching on street corners about free food that makes you see visions.

    The party enters the tavern, which is dimly lit, full of shady characters, and absolutely reeks of alcohol, impinged with a distinct metallic scent. They identify a dwarf sitting across the room, surrounded by bodyguards; they also spot a table on the other side of the room occupied by two grey orcs, two catfolk, and one lizard man--the Blood Bowl team.

    They approach the opposing blood bowl team and offer to buy them drinks. The team laughs at the group, and accepts. Saburo heads to the bar and buys drinks for everyone. As he does so, he notices the Dwarf speaking to one of his bodyguards and gesturing towards the Halfling (disguised as D.B.).
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)21:22 No.10034174
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    >>10034102
    There is no way this is gonna end well
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)21:23 No.10034192
    I always wanted to ask...
    Which cartoon is the OP guy from?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)21:23 No.10034196
    >>10034015
    >Gangstrom, one of the Dwarven Pimp-Kings

    I remember the thread you made to come up with this, good shit bro.
    >> TORYSTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)21:24 No.10034206
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    >>10034192
    The Iron Giant, it's an animated movie. Watch it.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)21:24 No.10034211
    >>10034192
    Iron Giant.
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)21:26 No.10034268
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    >>10034102

    Saburo ignores this, and returns with beer. He gives a tankard to each person, but notices that all the beer smells strangely metallic.

    He manifests psychic precognition, and through a fuckup on my behalf, determines that drinking the beer will cause the imbiber INT damage. He gestures to the party to not drink of the beer, but it's too late for the other blood bowl team, who begin swilling away.

    One of Gangstrom's bodyguards approaches the table, and upon seeing that the Blood Bowl team is drinking the beer, becomes furious: "YOU WERE TOLD NOT TO DRINK THE BEER. IT IS OFF LIMITS"

    The Blood Bowl team, who are all impressively drunk by now, collectively tells him to blow it out his ass... and then Gangstrom himself comes over.

    Gangstrom grows even more furious and reprimands his team, and then threatens the party for their involvement in this.

    Al'Sham then pipes up, motioning towards D.B.
    "Here's our boss so rich, our master elect
    Best hold your knave tongues, gotta show some respect!"

    Gangstrom gets infuriated, and quips back, pointing at D.B.
    "You mighty brave, calling me a knave,
    But your beard looks like mine does, AFTER I shave"

    Al'Sham fires back:
    "Your crew's running strong, that ain't no surprise,
    but even homeless bums know your exploits are lies"

    Gangstrom returns:
    "Every word you say is more crass than the last,
    the beard on your chin can't compare to the hair on your ass"

    Al'Sham retorts:
    "You're flashing big guns, got your beard real profilin'
    but your shit is weak, just mad that I'm stylin'"
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)21:28 No.10034312
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    >>10034268

    Rap battle with a Dwarven Pimp-King?

    Yes. A thousand times, yes.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)21:29 No.10034321
    >>10034268
    >mic battles
    whatthefuckamireadingandwhyisntthereMOAR.jpg
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)21:29 No.10034323
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    >>10034206>>10034211
    Thanks
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)21:30 No.10034354
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    >>10034268
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)21:31 No.10034366
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    >>10034268
    OH GOD WHAT IS GOING OOOOON
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)21:35 No.10034437
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    >>10034268

    It is on.

    Gangstrom calls for his bodyguards to bury these insolent whelps and their dwarf master, D.B.

    When Al'Sham again speaks up, "We're here to challenge your pathetic team here to a game of Blood Bowl."

    Everyone listening to this altercation bursts into laughter. They know that Gangstrom's team are the champions.

    Al'Sham continues, "This is D.B. He's the new dwarf in town, and he's going to make an example out of all of you poser-ass stunties. We're his blood bowl team, and we demand a match against your boys."

    Gangstrom eases up, and accepts the challenge, seeing it as an opportunity to make some easy money: "Very well then. Tomorrow, we will cancel our match against Beardfist's team and play your... 'crew' instead."

    The party exits the tavern and Edgar informs Bartholdy that the match has now been set against Gangstrom's team. They return to the hideout, and retire for the night.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)21:37 No.10034482
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    >>10034268
    >DnD rap battle

    Aww yeah nigguh, straight Sword'n'Board dat shit.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)21:37 No.10034485
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    >>10034268
    I love story tiem.
    >> Al'Sham Wyles 05/24/10(Mon)21:38 No.10034496
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    sup guys, Al'Sham here

    You guys better fucking stick around for the Blood Bowl match, this was fucking awesome
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)21:38 No.10034502
    >>10034437
    >Tomorrow, we will cancel our match against Beardfist's team
    >Beardfist

    Oh god, is his full name Fistbeard Beardfist?!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)21:39 No.10034518
    >>10034496
    I got all night Broseph Balin, I plan on seeing this thread to the end.
    >> Eponymous Rex !!taqDd9490Ip 05/24/10(Mon)21:40 No.10034524
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    >>10034482
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)21:40 No.10034526
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    >>10034502
    It had better be
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)21:40 No.10034527
    >>10034496
    How dare you show your face in this place without a disguise - hell - I can even see your real eyes!
    >> MC Divine Justice 05/24/10(Mon)21:42 No.10034568
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    >>10034268
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)21:43 No.10034590
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    >>10034437
    Now's about time to explain the rules of Blood Bowl.

    The game is played on a 26 square long by 18 square wide field. There are two endzones at the long ends, colored red and blue. Some obstacles mirrored on both sides of the field block easy access to the endzones (two staggered rows of 10-foot walls), and the central area contains a large hoop, open faced towards each end zone.

    The teams have five players each, and full contact is allowed and encouraged. It's not Pillow Bowl, it's Blood Bowl. People die in this game.

    Now, the central area under the hoop is sloped slightly into a bowl shape. When play begins, three goblins are released into the central area, whereupon the object of the game is to capture a goblin and tear off it's head (DC 15 strength check).

    The goblin head is the 'ball'. Once in possession of the ball, you must throw the ball through the central hoop, at which point it becomes colored red or blue randomly. A team must then take the goblin head towards the proper endzone to score a point. The first team to 2 points wins, but play does not stop until all three goblin heads have been scored, or a team is completely dead.

    Stealing the ball from another player is a standard action, with opposed dex rolls. Tossing the ball to another player is a ranged touch; intercepting the ball if you're in a line to the other player is a reflex save.

    If the ball fumbles, a d8 determines which direction it goes, and a d3 determines how far it rolls.

    If you want a full list of Blood Bowl rules, I'll make that at some point, it was hell of fun to play.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)21:44 No.10034601
    >>10034527
    Shit son, don't be hasslin' the mighty Al'Sham
    Greatest dwarf battler in all the land
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)21:45 No.10034626
    >>10034590
    I'm interesting in using those rules sometime, I'd appreciate you posting them later when you finish with the campaign story.
    >> Al'Sham Wyles 05/24/10(Mon)21:46 No.10034645
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    >>10034590

    Note that our Blood Bowl bears no resemblance to the fine board game by Games Workshop.
    >> MC Divine Justice 05/24/10(Mon)21:46 No.10034653
    >>10034568

    Anyone interested in a /tg/ rap thread tonight, by the way?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)21:48 No.10034681
    >>10034645
    This should be the new blood bowl.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)21:48 No.10034686
    >>10034653
    Later, although my rhymes suck shit
    I'll just have to learn to deal with it
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)21:52 No.10034764
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    >>10034590

    So the next day, the party makes their way to the Blood Bowl arena. They leave their weapons behind, as Blood Bowl is played only with fists, a set of +2 leather armor, and whatever you happen to be able to sneak onto the field without anyone noticing.

    Magic is allowed, but generally seen as ineffective because you'd just get bum-rushed.

    Al'Sham creates a major image of D.B. which will be present in a VIP box overlooking the Blood Bowl Arena. Gregor and Estaad will accompany the image as bodyguards, and Evennia will go as arm-candy.

    As they go through Undermine, they notice more people preaching on streetcorners, and other people going through visible signs of Kerrathil withdrawal. There are posters EVERYWHERE for the upcoming blood bowl match, courtesy of Maxwell Bartholdy, and upon arrival, the party discovers that they have 20-to-1 odds against them in the betting rings; these odds plummet even further once the crowd gets a look at them...

    The Fabulous Edgar
    The pint-sized Halfling
    The not-too-threatening looking Al'Sham
    And the melee-handicapped Joseph Knock.
    Saburo is the only one who looks imposing.

    Their opponents are:

    Three-Skull Sharpfang, a muscular lizardman
    Grogslammer, a huge grey orc
    Glognus, the brother of Grogslammer
    Mona, a catfolk
    Thriss, another catfolk.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)21:53 No.10034792
    >>10034764
    It's not the size of the dog in the fight, but the fight inside of the dog.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)21:57 No.10034865
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    BRACING FOR...ANYTHING.
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)22:04 No.10034992
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    >>10034764

    While they're all in the locker room, Edgar proceeds to infuse everyone's armor with buffing transmutes, Cat's Grace, Bull's Strength, all that good shit. Hell yeah. Saburo informs me that he can expend power points to gain extra movement speed through some ability. The underdogs are going into this completely loaded.

    With a few opening words from Gangstrom, Blood Bowl begins. The central ring lowers three goblins onto the field, and then floats back up into its regular position. The goblins look starved, weak, and emaciated.

    But they're fast! Play begins with the goblins attempting to scamper away, as both teams attempt to grab the goblins. Catgirl 1 (mona) closes in on a goblin, only to be HALTED by Al'Sham.

    Saburo delays his action until after Al'Sham, who goes next. Al'Sham casts Haste on the party, and Saburo goes after another one that darted out to the side.

    The halfling joins Al'Sham, and initiates grapple with the goblin, but fails. The lizardman approaches and attempts to grapple the same goblin, succeeding. The two Orcs rush forward and start to beat on the halfling, one whiffs, the other connects with a punch.

    The last catgirl goes after the goblin Saburo is chasing, while Edgar readies Magic Stones, and Joseph Knock gets in position for a throw.

    When it gets back up to the goblins, they frantically attack the people next to them, but miss. Al'Sham casts Confusion on the Lizardman, who succumbs to the spell and is effectively screwed for the rest of the fight.

    Saburo initiates grapple with the goblin, then takes another action to rip it's head off. He now has the ball!

    However, the catgirl next to him succeeds on her check to steal the ball, and gains possession.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)22:08 No.10035072
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    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)22:11 No.10035125
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    >>10034992


    Meanwhile the lizardman becomes confused, and I roll a 76 for his effect... which means he attacks the closest person: his orc buddy. So lizardman attempts to take a big bite out of a grey Orc, while the other orc attempts to grapple the goblin between him and the halfing. He succeeds, and tears the goblin's head off.

    The Halfling seizes the opportunity to steal the ball, and succeeds. The other catgirl moves to attack Joseph Knock and the last goblin runs off into the obstacles. Edgar attempts to use the magic stones to attack, but whiffs, Joseph attempts to punch the catgirl but sucks at melee and can't.

    Al'Sham casts Hold Person on the catgirl with the ball, and she drops it. Saburo picks it up, and tosses it through the hoop, where it lands close to Joseph Knock and the other catgirl. The two orcs spend their turns attempting to manhandle the halfling, but can't hit him, while the Lizardman rolls high on a %, and attempts to take another chunk out of his buddy.

    The catgirl in melee with Joseph takes an AoO to grab the ball, which is now colored RED, but gets HALTED by Al'Sham. Edgar attempts more magic stone attacks but none hit this time either. Joseph Knock ends the round by attempting to steal the ball from the catgirl, but fails.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)22:16 No.10035252
    Curse you University, I have to get to sleep or else I'm kinda fucked. Good knight epic story man, I shall read your thread in the Archives
    >> Al'Sham Wyles 05/24/10(Mon)22:17 No.10035278
    Bump god damn you
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)22:19 No.10035316
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    >>10035271

    The only goblin still alive is still hiding in the obstacles, as it is now Al'Shams turn again. He moves in a better position and casts Hold Person on Catgirl with the ball, but it is resisted. Saburo dashes forth to attempt to steal ball from the catgirl, and fails.

    The halfing chucks the ball in his posession through the hoop, where it gets colored BLUE. The two orcs continue attempting to pummel the Halfling, and the lizard man AGAIN ROLLS HIGH AND KEEPS BITING HIS ORC BUDDY.

    The other catgirl, however, makes a dash and grabs the other ball. Both catgirls are now in possession.

    But this does not last long. Edgar uses another round of magic stones, hitting the orc attacking the Halfling, while Joseph Knock attempts to steal the red ball from the catgirl, and succeeds, but does not succeed by a high enough margin and the Red ball is fumbled.

    On his next turn, Al'Sham casts his final Confusion spell to turn the Catgirl with the blue ball into a drooling mess, and Saburo picks up the red ball and blows a bunch of powerpoints to run 80 fucking feet and go for a goal. Edgar goes for the ball the confused catgirl dropped, and picks it up.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)22:25 No.10035468
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    LIVE THREAD. LIVE.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)22:25 No.10035472
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    FUCK YES, SEGATA SABURO BRO'S AGAIN.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)22:25 No.10035473
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    inb4 Knock pulls a hail mary
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)22:30 No.10035575
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    >>10035316

    Right about now, the crowd starts chanting, "GROG SLAMMER GROG SLAMMER!" And the orc attacking the Halfling jumps in the air and belly-flops the halfling, and succeeds on a grapple. On his next turn, the halfling frees himself with a sweet escape artist roll, and whispers to the orc, "I will take your life." The halfling spots a jagged bone on the ground, and picks it up.

    Meanwhile the confused catperson is babbling like an idiot, and I again, roll high on the percentage to make lizardman keep attacking the now-unconscious orc. The crowd is absolutely going bonkers, seeing their favorite team reduced to a pile of idiots, getting skunked 1-0, with the opposing team in possession of the second ball.

    Edgar passes the ball off to Al'Sham, who runs it in for a second point. The team has just won the game, but now the humiliation round for the last point begins!

    The lone goblin hiding amongst the obstacles is set upon by Saburo, who uses Dissipating Touch to grab the goblin's neck and dissolve it (I allowed it). He now holds the head, and moves in position to throw it through the hoop on his next.

    However... Saburo has moved into position such that he flanks the orc with the Halfling.

    Which means the Halfling now gets sneak attack.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)22:30 No.10035582
    >>10035072

    On a vaguely related note, wouldn't it be awesome is Tyson Heese of Boxerhockey drew all this out in comic form?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)22:36 No.10035673
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    >>10035575
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)22:38 No.10035698
    wrap it up op i need to fucking sleep
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)22:38 No.10035701
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    >>10035575

    The halfling uses the jagged bone piece to explode the orc into a mess of blood. Because Al'Sham is now out of HALTS, Joseph Knock attempts to grapple the non-confused catgirl, and succeeds in pinning her, but on her tern, she escapes and gets thrown a square back, towards the center of the arena.

    Al'Sham then casts some rainbowy magic spell (I think it was Hypnotic Pattern) that catches the lizardman, the confused catgirl, and the non-confused catgirl under it's spell. Saburo throws the goblin head through the hoop, and it is caught by Joseph Knock.

    The Halfling walks over to the unconscious orc and coup-de-grace's him with the bone, while Joseph Knock flourishes and walks the ball to the endzone.

    Al'Sham moves the hypnotic pattern to go right under the VIP box where Gangstrom is sitting (AND OH MAN IS HE PISSED).

    The crowd is going absolutely insane right now. Everyone just lost so much money on their bets, and the fact that the party just SKUNKED the champion team with a 3-0 victory was something that nobody had foreseen.

    The best part is, that the confused lizardman and confused catgirl started attacking each other after Hypnotic Pattern was ended... and the Lizardman bit her head off.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)22:39 No.10035729
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    >>10035575
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)22:45 No.10035831
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    >>10035701

    The party expeditiously leaves the arena and Al'Sham hastily disguises them (although not very well). Rioting is heard outside the doors, and the crowd has now rushed the field.

    Impressed by their own victory, the party now heads back to the hideout, and Edgar attempts to call Bartholdy about the Blood Bowl match, but there is no answer from Bartholdy.

    Edgar instead sends his homunculus, the mechanical owl, to fly up to Echelon and deliver the message personally. However, as he guides the owl upwards, he notices that there are no Automatons in sight, at least in Portland.

    As it flies up the cliff. The owl catches sight of a few automatons in Echelon, but they all appear to have stopped working, and technicians seem to be operating on them.

    Then Saburo notices that there is no psionic hum emanating from the beacon.

    Something seems ominously wrong.


    As the party reaches the hideout, Saburo hears the worst, ear-piercing, shrieking noise known to mankind (Its called ouch.wav, let me know if you want it). With some focus, he manages to suppress the sound in his mind. However, as Edgar's owl flies, Edgar sees that the Automatons in Echelon have suddenly sprung to life.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)22:46 No.10035853
    >>10035831

    Arise, Clanking Masses, arise!
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)22:46 No.10035858
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    >>10035831

    And that, patien/t g/entlemen, is where we will be picking up the campaign in August.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)22:47 No.10035881
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    >>10035858
    YOU CAN'T FUCKING END THERE
    >> No Man 05/24/10(Mon)22:48 No.10035893
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    >>10035701
    >>10035831

    BECOMING INCREASINGLY REAL
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)22:49 No.10035921
    >>10035858
    i must read story but tiem too slow!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)22:50 No.10035948
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    >>10035858
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)22:51 No.10035962
    >>10035858
    WHHHHHHHHHHHHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!?
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)22:52 No.10036002
    >>10035858

    Until then, my good man.
    >> Alpharius 05/24/10(Mon)22:53 No.10036031
    WRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)22:55 No.10036051
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    Things to keep in mind:

    With the fact that the party has now fucked over the Dwarves three ways from Sunday, the Dwarves are effectively now fighting a war on three fronts.

    They suspect that the Military Police attempted to start shit with them by seizing their drugs, so now they want to retaliate against the people of Echelon.

    They just incurred a huge gambling debacle against the people, as the victory of the party was a complete upset and resulted in a massive loss for nearly everyone. People will be rioting and looting shit as a result.

    Lastly, the depletion of the stores of Kerrathil will lead to withdrawal amongst the people, and ultimately result in the success of the party's fake religion... which now supplies the drugs.

    Now the Automatons will shortly be on the rampage.

    So how do the Muramasa Sword, Automatons, Dwarven Pimps, and the Prophet D.B. all correlate?

    I assure you all these things are drawn together. We'll just have to see how, exactly, in the conclusion.


    Now I'm exhausted. How you guys like it so far. We're roughly halfway through.
    >> Alpharius 05/24/10(Mon)22:56 No.10036078
    >>10036051
    Your stories are awesome, your players are awesome, you should feel awesome.
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)22:56 No.10036096
    Oh, and the soundtrack to Blood Bowl was totally Hell March 1&2 from the Red Alert soundtrack.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)22:56 No.10036098
    >>10036051
    So, you're not stopping until August? THANK GOD.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)23:00 No.10036169
    Oh god I tried to archive it but sup/tg/ can't handle 8-digit thread numbers WHAT DO?
    >> No Man 05/24/10(Mon)23:00 No.10036175
    >>10036098

    No, that's when part 2 STARTS.
    >> Monstahman 05/24/10(Mon)23:02 No.10036205
    >>10036051
    as usual your group and game are incredibly entertaining from a spectator standpoint with the creativity of your setting and even more so of your players I have to say it's all kinds of awesome. Leaving everything semi open for every PC to pitch in and utterly cause mayhem while keeping things under a veil of just-as-planed has had me hooked for each of your updates since the first.
    TLDR: I tip my wizard hat to you good sir!
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)23:04 No.10036245
    >>10036205
    *brofist* thanks.
    >> No Man 05/24/10(Mon)23:07 No.10036295
    >>10036169

    Shit. SUPTG'S NOT WORKINGGGGGGGGG

    AND THERE'S A REALLY GOOD STORY THAT NEEDS TO BE PRESERVED.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)23:08 No.10036307
    >>10034590
    >full list

    YES

    WHY DO YOU EVEN ASK
    >> Monstahman 05/24/10(Mon)23:10 No.10036362
    >>10036245
    Better thanks is to keep your magnificent game going and don't stop till the fun runs out.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)23:11 No.10036375
    >>10036295
    Is there any way we can contact whoever runs suptg?

    Is there any other way to archive this thread? I mean, its got another 150 posts before it starts autosaging... that's how much time we have
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)23:12 No.10036400
    >>10036295

    save page as. then you can chop together a compilation image at your leisure.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)23:13 No.10036414
    Release full Blood Bowl rules please.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)23:14 No.10036437
    >>10036375
    1. Look for Lord Licorice on the sup/tg/ irc (irc.thisisnotatrueending.com)

    2. Auto-sage limit was raised to 300 posts, so we have about 200 more to go, brosef.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)23:15 No.10036465
    rolled 1 = 1

    STORYTIEM! i love you man
    >> Monstahman 05/24/10(Mon)23:15 No.10036470
    >>10036400
    best to go that rout in case of auto sage, then someone could just make a threat ment souly to pose the caped images once the suptg thing gets sorted out
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)23:17 No.10036516
    >>10036470
    Hmmm that's unfortunate.

    If that's the case, I'll save the blood bowl rules for a different thread. The game ended out working a lot better than I had imagined, and it was a lot of fun to play.

    On thing I liked seeing was how many attacks of opportunity were going on. Usually people avoid those as much as possible, but we realized pretty quick that you have to take them in Blood Bowl to get a good field position.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)23:19 No.10036571
    There has to be a way to do it. Those damn Arkham Horror threads got archived, and they're above the 7-number mark.
    >> Monstahman 05/24/10(Mon)23:22 No.10036626
    >>10036516
    the magnificen/tg/entalmen at suptg are working on the archive problem as we speak so kickass to Minoval there.

    on topic whit blood bowl, the need to risk AoO does make sense after all it's meant to be brutal by your descriptions.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)23:23 No.10036654
    >>10036571
    Just checked the AH threads. Apparently the person who archived them "hacked the gibson", so its available for voting =/
    >> Monstahman 05/24/10(Mon)23:24 No.10036672
    also need a name and description for this thread so it can get archived in. make it quick guys.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)23:30 No.10036785
    >>10036672
    http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/10032392/index-bak-orig.htm

    it's up
    >> Monstahman 05/24/10(Mon)23:31 No.10036803
    http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/10032392

    Archived!
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)23:49 No.10037124
    Storytiem, you are awesome. I for one would love to see your rules for Blood Bowl.
    >> STORYTIEM 05/24/10(Mon)23:49 No.10037135
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    Okay, seeing as the thread HAS been archived (thanks!) I'll post the Blood Bowl rules:

    Apart from what's already been said, here are rules for handling the ball:

    To pick up a ball off the ground, you need to either share a square with the ball or be in a square adjacent to it. Picking the ball up counts as a standard action.

    Throwing the ball can be used a standard action or a move action, as long as you have line of effect to the target (as in, I pick up a ball at my feet and throw it at someone; or I move with the ball I'm carrying, stop, and throw it. I can't pick up the ball, move, and throw it).

    Throwing the ball does not provoke AoO's from hostile players, but if they're adjacent to you, or within the path of the ball as it is thrown, they get a chance to intercept the pass.

    Interceptions are reflex saves made by an opposing team member, at a DC determined by the DM. If they beat the DC by 5 or more, the opposing player has intercepted the pass and caught the ball. If they pass by less than 5, the ball is fumbled.

    For fumbles, you roll a d8 to determine which direction the ball scatters (I'm assuming you know how to do that), and a d3 to determine how many squares in that direction it rolls.

    Stealing the ball is an opposed Dex check between the person attempting to steal the ball and the person holding the ball. Stealing is a standard action, and if you beat the defender's score by more than 5, you steal the ball and now have possession, else the ball is fumbled.

    Tackling is also quite effective. Basically the normal bull rush rules apply, except instead of pushing the other person back, you knock them to the ground, and the ball is fumbled. Blood Bowl is not all about Dex, as strength characters can trample you down, grapple you, and tackle.
    >> Anonymous 05/24/10(Mon)23:53 No.10037206
    >>10037135

    Now that sounds like something fun to run.
    >> STORYTIEM 05/25/10(Tue)00:01 No.10037361
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    >>10037135

    Grappling is very effective at immobilizing players, and making it easier to tear off the goblin heads.

    There are two ways to obtain a goblin head:

    Grapple the Goblin: If you have a goblin in grapple, you can make a DC 15 Strength check to tear off the goblin's head. At the end of this action, you are considered standing with the goblin head in your possession, removing the head counts as a standard action. The goblins can only use a bite attack against their grappler when being grappled.

    Kill the goblin: A dead goblin requires a DC 10 STR check to pop off the head. This is considered a standard action.

    Throwing through the loop:
    Hurling the goblin head through the loop is a dex-based action, which increases in difficulty based on how far away you are from the loop. The loop has a 10 foot diameter, and is parallel with the dividing line on the field (it faces open towards both endzones). Throwing through the hoop requires you to beat a DC 9 dex check, +1 DC for the total square distance you are from the hoop, and a strength check to see how far through the hoop the ball lands.

    If you beat a 15 on your Strength check, the ball goes through the hoop an equal number of squares to your distance from the hoop. If you got under a 15, subtract 1 square of distance for every 3 points your score is lower than 15.
    >> STORYTIEM 05/25/10(Tue)00:06 No.10037449
    >>10037361

    Catching the ball is always an immediate action, as you can catch the ball off your own turn (everyone gets initiatives to determine turn order... but you probably assumed that).

    Passing the ball to a friendly player can be done as a standard action, provided you are both occupying adjacent squares. Passing the ball is simple and requires no rolling, you just need to be next to each other.

    Players all move at their own move speed, unless augmented by another spell or effect.

    The player of Saburo was suggesting to have the ball gain a 10 foot antimagic field once thrown through the central hoop. This removes magic buffs, debuffs, and effects to make the game more fair. I think it's a good idea, but it's up to you if you decide to run it.

    Personally I think it would be the most fun as a face-beaty game between two teams of non-magic users.

    Any other questions? I think everything is pretty much covered.
    >> STORYTIEM 05/25/10(Tue)00:07 No.10037474
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    >>10037449

    Oh, and the goblin heads also whisper "I'M SAD" to whoever tears them off.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/10(Tue)00:08 No.10037492
    >>10032518
    >Hebrides Overture
    >>10033148
    >Bartholdy
    Fuck yeah, Mendelssohn.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/10(Tue)00:27 No.10037820
    What happens if the ball ends up inside the hoop due to somebody botching their strength check at just the right amount?
    >> STORYTIEM 05/25/10(Tue)00:30 No.10037859
    >>10037820

    Throw someone else through the hoop to get the ball?

    Throw a goblin's body through the hoop to knock the head free?
    >> Anonymous 05/25/10(Tue)00:44 No.10038102
    >>10037474
    HEH.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/10(Tue)00:46 No.10038139
    This thread is archived, right
    I mean I haven't read through it yet, but it's a continuation of Storytiem's shitkickingly awesome previous threads, so it's gotta be pretty damn good
    >> Anonymous 05/25/10(Tue)01:10 No.10038578
    Back to the front page.

    I'm going to give blood bowl a try in the next game I run. I'm having a hard time following your descriptions of the field though, do you mind drawing up a template?
    >> STORYTIEM 05/25/10(Tue)01:18 No.10038740
         File1274764730.jpg-(28 KB, 717x629, Blood Bowl.jpg)
    28 KB
    >>10038578

    I think a lot of the fun comes from how you customize it yourself. This is basically the map that we played on.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/10(Tue)01:20 No.10038781
    >>10038740

    Awesome. I like how it looks like a football.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/10(Tue)01:21 No.10038794
    >>10032391

    w cicc vctep i uc u xlin v lsz
    >> STORYTIEM 05/25/10(Tue)01:50 No.10039301
    Also, I thought I should mention that I will be resurrecting Tyrone the Monk in an upcoming 4e game. This time will be different.

    inb4
    >4e
    >> Anonymous 05/25/10(Tue)02:33 No.10039965
    holy fuck that was a good read. your group is fucking amazing, I cant wait for the next einstallment.

    courtesy bump :)
    >> Anonymous 05/25/10(Tue)03:06 No.10040495
    >>10039301

    Fuck yeah. I hope you tell us about it; Monks are totally badass in 4e, as opposed to 3.5's lackluster version.
    >> Anonymous 05/25/10(Tue)04:32 No.10041659
         File1274776327.jpg-(81 KB, 430x250, 1247250033741.jpg)
    81 KB
    6th page? not on my watch
    >> Anonymous 05/25/10(Tue)05:24 No.10042273
         File1274779463.png-(496 KB, 2854x2154, 1237255734356.png)
    496 KB
    >>10041659

    AGAIN, NOT ON MY WATCH >:
    >> Anonymous 05/25/10(Tue)06:59 No.10043358
         File1274785171.jpg-(376 KB, 1920x1080, 1251593964229.jpg)
    376 KB
    Rise!
    >> Anonymous 05/25/10(Tue)09:44 No.10045384
    Live, I command you! LIVE!
    >> Anonymous 05/25/10(Tue)13:00 No.10047889
    hope for a new generation



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