>Catherine the Great: 10
I think you should roll NOT to fuck her.

rolled 1 + 4 = 5

Female soldier. She's hammered.

ROLLAN!

Neckbeards.
Neckbeards everywhere.

rolled 14 + 4 = 18

>>12554174

Holy shit I laughed so hard I spit up my drink.

Art imitates life!

>>12554133
Well done, OP.

Good except that unmarried female soldiers are much easier than serving wenches or commoners. Even the married ones tend to be pretty easy.

I speak from experience.

rolled 4 = 4

Serving wench, both hammered

rolled 3 + 14 = 17

Going after the queen, after saving her father from kidnappers and performed several other deeds, with high ranks in bluff and completely drunk!

Looks like the dice know how /tg/ rolls in real life too

rolled 19 = 19

REALISM UP IN HERE LOL

rolling for Lord's Daughter, she's hammered and i'm a Duke

With Current 11th level DnD character

10 rolls per night
5 ladies at once
22 bonus

22 bonus? I think I'll go pick up 5 lady soldiers each night.

>>12554208
Seconded. Female soldier should be 18.

Otherwise OP is to be applauded.

rolled 8 = 8

UNMARRIED QUEEN, MOTHERFUCKERS!

She's drunk, and I have just enough stats + skills to need a 20 to pull it off.

Gimme DAT ASS!

>>12554229
Hahaha. Well played.

>>12554235
Damn, you could pick up a princess on a natural 18-20.

>>12554229

Lol'd

>>12554244
Even easier if they're hammered, know about my heroism or are impressed by my stuff.

rolled 3 + 21 = 24

I am level 20 with 10 STR, 12 CON, 14 DEX, 12 INT, 14 WIS, 14 CHA. Therefore 10+0+1+2+1+1+2+4= 21 bonus.

Now the lady is hammered. +4
But so am I. -4
I have no money on me beyond a few coins for piss.
Annnd she is the is the queen. so DC45 and I am a commoner. We will call that 8 so -16. And I saved the life of her 2 sisters by being smart and shooting the bandit rather then disarming. +20
LETS DO THIS

rolled 12, 5, 6, 5, 5, 19, 13, 5, 18, 7, 2, 2, 5, 20 = 124

A player of mine's lesbian female oracle:

Max ladies rolls: 2x7 = 14
Maximum ladies she can get at once = 7
Bonus to her roll:
STR .... -1.5
DEX .... 5
CON .... 3
INT .... 0
WIS .... 1
CHA .... 14
= +21 on the roll.

+2 for being in a tavern.

She's fourth in the kingdom - Monarch, Archmage, General, Secretary, Warden, etc. etc. down the line of PCs.

So, her rolls.

>>12554155
>should roll NOT to fuck her
Pic related

/tg/
THIS IS HOW WE ROLL
btw what's the DC on your right hand?

rolled 20 + 21 = 41

>>12554275
:( Bummer

Lets try again /tg/ now she is even MORE smashed!

>>12554281
If all your Intelligence is 4 or higher, you're good

Love it, except for
>Maximum number of ladies you can get at once: 1, or base CHA modifier, whichever is higher.

Really? In all my years of life, I've only seen or been able to pull that off exactly 4 times. (2 personal, 2 friends... obviously I can't account for all friends, so that may be higher).

I'd say:
Maximum number of ladies you can get at once: 1, +1 for each natural 20 and roll again.

>>12554276

>rolled 12, 5, 6, 5, 5, 19, 13, 5, 18, 7, 2, 2, 5, 20

Over the night, assuming she goes for the right DCs, the oracle can get crazy with about two serving girls, 7 neighboring lord's daughters at once (about a +8 on this roll from status), a duke's daughter or four, and a neighboring princess.

Aiming for the queen (-8) on the roll, but obviously being a national hero (+5) in addition to being at the king's banquet (+3) and getting the queen hammered (+4) but also being hammered herself (-4) bags the king's personal secretary a nightcap conquest that both of them will forever regret.

>>12554284
Natural 20 and I still fail!

>>12554318
Just like real life

DC for Catherine the Great is only 5 if you're a horse.

>>12554208

Oh god, tell me more. What approach is best for them.

-4 Strength is a weakness of mine.

OP here.

Glad to see you guys like this. I'm going to see what my Barbarian can do at level 6......

Stat Bonus = (Level6/2 + 1.5*4 STR bonus +1.5*3 CON bonus +2 DEX bonus -1 WIS bonus -2*1 CHA bonus +0 INT bonus) = +12

So, if I was to become of equal standing to her, the highest thing on I list I could get is a Duke's daughter, and that's still on a natural 20. However, I can always get a commoner down in the bar, or a serving wench with pretty good regularity.

rolled 11 + 43 = 54

After the queen, while drunk. My incredible stats and bluff ranks will bring me victory! Only a natural 1 would fail!

(inb4 natural 1)

>>12554372
>However, I can always get a commoner down in the bar
They only want you because of your mighty thews.

>>12554380
Yes!

Hmm. Also, this thing needs some racial modifiers. What if I'm an elf? Or an orc? Or something else?

>>12554384

They're an Elf = +20

Orc males +5
Elf males -5

>>12554382
And I'm OK with that. I only want them for their broad hips and great bosoms.

I think more appropriate would be:
Same race: -4 DC. (Half-elf elf would qualify)
Similar race: At DC. (Elf - human qualifies)
Odd pairing: +4 DC. (Elf + Gnome or halfling?)
ORC+ELF style pairing: DC x2.
Dwarf+elf style pairing: DC x10.
God help the souls who try for a Dwarf-elf pairing.

Bar Wenches?

Bar Wenches.

>situational modifier for status difference
>DC adjusted by status of woman
NOPE

either adjust the DC or apply a modifier; don't do both for the same thing

>>12554432
Actually.
Make Orc+elf x4
and Orc+human x2
Multipliers apply to the base DC or the modified DC, whichever is higher.

>>12554318
NO WAIT I DIDNT ADD IN MY +4 for her being uber drunk OR my -16 or +20. SO +8
FUCK YEAH I GOT THE QUEEN!

>>12554446
As her standing goes higher and higher, she becomes more and more haughty, which stacks with her lack of desire to sleep with members of the lower classes. This was made presuming that most or all adventurers are commoner equivalent to start off.
>>12554432
>>12554463
Ah, but that does not take into account women with racial fetishes (ie; if an orc tries to seduce an elf who, unknown to him, has an orc fetish, he's a really lucky orc.)

>>12554508

What about a noble that's culturally slumming?

I'm disattisfied with this ruleset. We need something to take into account fetishes. As well as some sort of racial normalisation matrix.

>>12554520
Well, I'm satisfied with the mechanics, though this matrix and a fetish factor would be a definite factor. If someone is going to do this, do it relatively quickly. I've got a game tonight and I'd like to run the mechanic by the DMs to see if they like it.

>>12554508
Well der, but then fetish bonuses just eliminate the DC multiplier and possibly add a slight bonus.
You just wouldn't know they have that fetish until after.
But as far as a general rule of thumb? Might work. :P

Dukes Daughter: 32
Barons Daughter: 36

I think Dukes outrank Barons, so these two should be reversed.

Alrighty, let me get my game design hat on.

I'd say increase the dex mod to 1.5 in the case of elves, at least.

Fetish bonuses vary between +2 and +8, depending on the strength of the fetish, and the alignment with the character.

Easily Fulfilled Fetish: +1
Average Fetish: +2
Eosoteric Fetish +3

Along with:
Weak Fetish: +1
Average Fetish: +3
Strong Fetish: +6

Combine the two. So hitting on a dwarf who has strong fetish for tall ladies, and you're a tall elf, say, would give you a +6 and +1 bonus. +6 because tall ladies really get him going, and +1 because he's constantly finding tall ladies.

I'd probably say that that bonus gets reduced equal to your wisdom modifier, as well.

-10 if you're hitting on someone with a conflicting sexual inclination. So Chad the Fighter hitting on Tony the Barbarian would be at a -10 if Tony is straight.

>>12554606
Sounds good, although the penalty conflicting sexual inclination.Seriously, not even a young Brad Pitt could pick up an actual lesbian or your average straight man.

>>12554606
>only -10 for wrong orientation
You do realize how easy it is to be a Cha-whore Diplomancer right? -10 is nothing

>>12554626

You'd need for him to be hammered, have 20 ranks in diplomacy, and be higher up than them to pull it off.

I'd say that's an adequate penalty. Everyone has those experiences occasionally.

>>12554630
>>12554649
I'd say incompatible orientation is -50, but if he's really, really drunk and you roll a natural 20, you get him.

>>12554664

Hmm. Gender based modifiers, perhaps? Less for females, in my experience?

rolled 12, 6 + 4 = 22

female solider (high ranking officer)
im dunk but so is she, and im a Master Corporal probably going right back to private if i fuck this up

>>12554803
FUCK YEAH!
drunken sloppy sex followed by a very awkward hungover morning.
just like real life!

+2 for being a university student.

Rollin'

>suddenly, sexy Luca

Yes please.

I have 17 CHA, 6 rolls and +2 on the rolls for university student.

I got 20, 14, 5, 6, 7, 13

YES! Serving wench!

rolled 5 + 22 = 27

Lucien, my fighter.

Is it bad that I just scanned down the DC list for the hardest one?

>bangens was

>>12554922
Ah....no, why would it be?

rolled 23 + 10 = 33

>>12554869
rolling to see if mike gets any
we agreed on a -10 for same gender right?
im thinking luka would be a DC 24
dont think any situational modifiers apply here
so miku, you getting any tonight?

>>12554926
>>12554926
>my fucking face when +10
my bad
sorry miku but your 23 is not high enough
FOREVER ALONE!

>>12554926
>so miku, you getting any tonight?

She getting any alright, GETTING SCRAPED THAT IS!

Miku's DESIGNED for this shit.

THey must have know she'd be getting groupies.

rolled 5 + 4 = 9

Rollin

Female soldier, she's hammered, 5 ranks in bluff.

I wink at Violet....

rolled 3 = 3

Rolling for spell research

;_;

So, uh... +5 DC if she's married I guess?

You know, I'm noticing a trend of fa/tg/uys who want the female soldier...

>Catherine the Great: 10

remember because status counts... ugh.

level 16 minotaur barbarian gets 20, potentially 30.

Str = 9
Con= 7.5
wis = 2
He would be inebriated. Dont know if the queen he is attempting to seduce would be. Then again if her were throwing the party, like she would be.
tavern setting = 2
Status = He is a hammer lord. Equivilant to a King of the human nobility.

I suppose I get the +10 as well, what with my saving the world and all...

So thats 30 total. Not bad, for an ex slave. Gives me an even chance to take the queen to bed for the night. Though, seeing as how the DC would increase by 5 if I were to not call the following morning I guess not.

What about the impact of spells?
Charm person would almost certainly give a bonus.

What about the creatures existing attitude towards you? I imagine seducing a hostile princess is hard for anyone but a diplomancer. Seducing a friendly one should be much, much easier.

well considering my character is 17 and SHE has saved everyone in the town several times so she's familiar with and that her base stat bonuses give me +30 to my modifier... so i have like a +40 modifier.

Yeah i'm not rolling. She's just gonna go grab the soldier, Lord's Daughter, and Duke's daughter and have a 4 way lesbian orgy

Shooting for a dwarf chick (commoner) at a tavern (for +2.)

Total of all my stat modifiers, multiplied appropriately ~= +3

Level 1, no other outstanding modifiers... Shit, I've got about a 50% chance.

LET'S DO IT!

rolled 16 = 16

>>12559906
Whee, I fucked that up.

>>12556636
Mino, eh?
seems like we need to add to the pairing table
Weird Coupling: +6
Borderline bestiality: +12
Actual bestiality: +20

again, mitigated by fetishes.

Any modifiers for different races?

>>12559935
see
>>12554432
>>12554463
>>12554606
>>12559930

You are different size categories: +4 for each category of difference
You are different races: Varies.

Human/Dwarf, Gnome, or Halfling: +4
Human/Elf or Orc: +2
Human/Half-Elf or Half-Orc: +1

Half-Elf/Half-Orc: +2
Half-Elf/Orc: +4

Elf/Orc of Half-Orc: +8
Elf/Dwarf: +6
Elf/Half-Elf: +4
Elf/Halfling or Gnome: +2

Dwarf/Orc or Half-Orc: +8
Dwarf/Half-Elf: +4
Dwarf/Halfling or Gnome: +2

Half-Orc/Halfling or Gnome: +6

Halfling/Gnome: +2

Anything/Warforged: +15 ('Anything' includes Warforged.)

rolled 6 + 12 = 18

Going for a Commoner woman, in a tavern, of equal status to me, before either of us get hammered.

I'll use the stats of my last D&D character, a level 6 swordsage: +2 Tavern + 3 (level) + 5 DEX + 1.5 Con - 1 Int +3 Wis - 1 Cha + 1d20+12

I think I'll try to be a little more ambitious actually. Let's go Mayor's daughter.

rolled 20 + 11 = 31

>>12560035
well, this should be one lower, since I didn't double weight CHA, but none the less, I was shot down. Let's see if I can find a barmaid to comfort me.

DO YOU FUCKING NERDS REALIZE HOW GODDAMN CREEPY THIS SHIT IS?

rolled 4 + 11 = 15

>>12560069 FUCKING NERDS
You people and your oxymorons.

There are no penalties here for women trying to pick up other women.

>>12560087
I don't recognize that panel. New update?!

>>12560090
In the same train of thinking, there are no men for women to pick up.

>>12560129
Ah, there you are!

(samefag)

>>12560009
So I'm a warforged fighter of a rich commoner trying to seduce a warforged advisor to the queen.
Would roughly put her on the level of a Lord's daughter. High enough for a proper rank but just barely.

DC28 +15 for warforged +2 for a single rank above me -6 because I've lead the army against the gnoll army= DC39
Hmmm.
I have charisma 12 and Diplomancy trained at level 17. That gives me +14.
Lesse that makes that a difference of 25. Oh ass, when is Unit 364 the "Skullfaced" getting laid?

>>12560129
I'm %90 sure that's just one of the bonus images, and not part of an update.

>>12560178
BolloHOLYshitthatisawesome!

>>12560176
Well shit, dude, warforged don't even have genitals unless they have their bodies modified specifically to have them.

>>12560347
WE HAVE THE TECHNOLOGY!

>>12560347
Pleasureforged, forged for their pleasure. From your local Pleasureforged forger found at the local forgeforged forging foundary.

forge

rolled 8 + 18 = 26

OK, 2 tries, I can pick up one... all my base stat modifiers=9 total as I am level 2, +1 for level, +1 for cha, +1 for str and con. so thats 12...+at a bar so 2, and she is drunk, so that totals 18, then I just bought 2 rounds for the whole tavern, so +2 more? thats a +20 bonus to my roll... going for the mayors daughter so -2
need 24
>measurable politics
captcha is rolling as well it seems

Hmm...building a lvl 30 druid for a campaign with my local group.

Base charisma is 16 (before gear and such), so 6 attempts.

+20 from over-all stat bonuses...
+15 from level.
Tavern? Sure, why not. +2
Hammered? Immune to poison.
She's hammered? Nae, I'd rather have 'em lucid.
Familier with deeds of heroism? Thousand-faces to be under the raydar atm.
Social status? Druid. So either hobo for living in the woods or demi-nobility by simple power, but I'm not aiming for any single individual.
Moving on.

Displays of wealth? Looking good in epic gear, dyed to match rather than looking like the technicolor hic-up it'd be without preperation. Greens the theme, 'course. Let's say with a +4.

Charming tongue....Seems like a +6.
Formal? Newp, slewthing into town as a bird, stealthing in unnoticed much as I can.

Recently saved someone? Probably, but again, hiding.

Adding a +5 for tossing a few charm potions in the drinks.

So.

Use a combination of Thousand Faces and some bluff checks in order to get some interesting-looking lovers a bit more intimate in public than they otherwise might be, slowly building it up into a rather lewd party at the inn. From there, seduce the cheriff's wife (and then the sherriff to get them both in on it) so that the law's not going to be a problem. Gradually work my way 'round the town 'till the entire place is too hot'n'bothered to sit still anymore, get some of the more smashed gals to set up a strip-tease, and let the whole mess coalesce into a public orgy.

Have fun at the castle ball folks. You'll hear about where the party Really was in the morning.

Rolling.

>>12561202
57
72 (nat 20 btw)
71
63
71
56

Whelp, gonna be busy a while.

>>12561202
>>12561270
awwwwwwww yeah

rolled 19, 2, 1 = 22

Why the fuck not?
Getting me some soldier pussy, no need for drinks.

+6 CHA (+6)
+3 STR (+2.25?)
+4 CON (+3)
+4 WIS (+2)
+3 INT (+1)
+3 DEX (+1)
9 Bluff (+1)

Only need a 6? Screw that! I'm getting two Soldiers drunk in a tavers and getting them both!

44 - 8 - 4 - 16 = DC of 16. That's more like it!

>>12557275
>Charm person would almost certainly give a bonus.
>Charm person
>This charm makes a humanoid creature regard you as its trusted friend and ally
>trusted friend and ally
>friend and ally
>friend

>>12560422

rolled 8 + 37 = 45

Okay, 4 rolls for ladies a night, and 2 ladies at once. Using my level 19 swordsage, so...
9+7+6+8+3+6+4=43
+5 str, +6 dex, +6 con, +3 int, +6 wis, +2 cha.
He's minor nobility, so let's say he's going for... a princess. We'll call it... three ranks difference, so that's -6, setting my total modifier at +37. DICE, DON'T FAIL ME NOW!

Bumping a hilarious thread.

Has this been archived? I don't have time to read it now.

>>12563590
Done. http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/12554133/

Was on the fence about this one (some threads aren't good archive material even though they're fun at the time), but what the hell. The first five posts were pretty great.

>>12561202
...this needs to get exponentially more difficult for epic heroes.

Also, I would add a +10 to DC is she is "in a relationship", +20 if she's married, +30 if she's happily married, -5 if she's unhappily married.

OP here.

HOLY SHIT. This thread is not only still alive, but has been ARCHIVED?!!?

Thank you, /tg/. I feel honored.