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  • File : 1289172731.jpg-(25 KB, 384x600, Eilistraee.jpg)
    25 KB Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)18:32 No.12716581  
    So yesterday my paladin was wandering about alone pondering about life. Earlier in the game he had killed a fellow follower of Pelor who had attempted to kill two teenage drow girls blaming them of a plague that had was destroying a remote town. The rest of the party went to find out why and discovered a black dragon had taken residence in a cave near the river and was puposedly poisoning the water. So, the two drow girls are found innocent and allowed to live, but not after my paladin has to strike down his NPC brother in arms.

    So, suddenly he hears a feminine voice and sees a drow girl sitting on a tree branch. She's older than the two drow kids, absurdly beautiful and she's completely naked and unashamed, with only her long hair covering her. She thanks the paladin for saving her "children" and they end making love non stop on the forest floor all night long. At the morning she is gone, but there is a small silver pendant shaped like a crescent moon, and the group's wizard say its a gift of Eilistraee.

    So, my paladin banged a drow Goddess for being a good fellow. I wonder if I should say goodbye to Pelor and follow Eilistraee instead.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)18:34 No.12716603
    >>12716581

    You know

    Dark elf pussy - fall

    But its your choice
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)18:37 No.12716631
    You don't need to say goodbye to anyone. Nothing stops you from paying respects to more than one god at the same time.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)18:39 No.12716656
    >>12716631

    I think OP means his PC is dissapointed at Pelor for allowing that to happen, while Eilistraee rewarded his good deed with divine T&A
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)18:40 No.12716662
    >>12716631
    I'd say you can only be a paladin of one god (or at least gods that are arm-in-arm- Twins, Sisters, the like).

    He could worship both, sure, but only one god can bless him directly all the time.

    I'd let him choose which god he calls his blessings from at prayer time (and make him pray at both gods' times- mechanically he picks at the beginning of the day) and use rules/flavor accordingly. I don't think there's any actual difference between them, rules-wise, though, so yeah.

    Yeah.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)18:42 No.12716686
    >>12716581

    Oh god, I wanna scream troll at the top of my lungs... this just smacks of it.

    I guess it's the whole 'girl give sex so i should worship her' notion.

    She had sex with your pally to say thank you. What else is she going to give you? You're a servant to a different god.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)18:42 No.12716692
    Word of warning OP:

    more paladins fall due to dark elf pussy than all other reasons combined.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)18:42 No.12716694
    >>12716686

    Girl?

    Its a fucking Goddess
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)18:46 No.12716729
    >>12716581

    Damn man. I wish I had a DM like that. My DM loves that "Do all your effort to be good and find out things still suck" grimdark shit. Makes rather pointless to play a paladin
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)18:48 No.12716752
    >>12716694

    So? Does a night of thank-you sex have to be anything more than a night of hot thank-you sex, just because it came from a minor goddess?

    If she wants him to convert, she's going to do more than bruise his hips and give him an amulet. It'll be a plot point. Signs will happen. He'll get feelings about it. Coincidental happenings. Maybe even dream visitation.

    At least, assuming a well-run campaign. Which, this may or may not be, since a goddess came down and had sex with a PC just for saving two girls. Usually there would be appreciation, sure, but not to that degree.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)18:48 No.12716754
    >>12716686
    In a setting which has casual lower power deities like D&D, it pretty much makes sense that worship would work via sexual communion with at least some gods (especially because a god is not just one being but a multitude of avatars and aspects).
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)18:48 No.12716758
    >>12716692

    But I bet most of them don't regret it.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)18:51 No.12716793
    >>12716754

    I just don't think things should be so blown out of proportion over it is all.

    Sometimes sex is just sex. I mean she IS a Drow, just an ascended Drow. Her mind is gonna work a little differently.

    Hell, OP can worship her all he wants. My gut reaction to the thread set off my trolldar was all.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)18:55 No.12716836
    >>12716758

    Can't drow girls turn good because of lawful human dick?
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)18:55 No.12716837
    >>12716694

    With emphasis on the "fucking"
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)19:01 No.12716894
         File1289174516.jpg-(88 KB, 317x452, belldandy not a woman.jpg)
    88 KB
    >>12716694
    >goddess
    >not a girl

    Ah yes, the Belldandy fallacy of deific gender determination.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)19:05 No.12716931
    >>12716894

    >Drow belldandy

    sorry to say this but...

    DO WANT
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)19:05 No.12716935
    >>12716931

    Drow Urd is where it's at.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)19:08 No.12716960
    >>12716686
    That must be that "the only thing women have to give is sex" thing you've got going there.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)19:08 No.12716970
         File1289174928.png-(322 KB, 1003x3232, 1286781742515.png)
    322 KB
    >>12716894
    Well played.


    Srsly though, @ OP here,
    There's that whole silly alignment bit if you want your pally to convert to Elistrae, but I'm not sure you're operating on a system with the usual 3.5 good/evil/law/chaos axis.

    If you are, and want to convert, ask your DM about Paladin of Freedom in Unearthed Arcana.

    If you're playing 4.0, I find myself wondering why elistrae is still alive, but otherwise don't forsee any such problems.

    If you're playing with a system I'm less familier with (WHF, Gurps, and the like) I would only be able to guess at the decision and results being something to consider for RPing's stake, more than mechanics, and that if your pally is truely dissapointed with his current patron's methods, and believes in earnest that he might be both better served (ahem) and better able to do good on behalf of a diety of dancing about, then have at.

    Besides, there's that bit about Pelor's references not checking out, and a little bit of background checking later....well....pic related.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)19:09 No.12716975
    >>12716935

    So in the /tg/ version of that manga, it is a fa/tg/uy loser instead of a japanese loser and there are elves instead of goddesses?

    Oh My Elf!?
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)19:09 No.12716978
    OP should say goodbye to his DM, really.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)19:11 No.12716995
    >>12716978

    That could be pretty awesome
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)19:11 No.12717001
    >>12716978
    Yeah. Ew.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)19:12 No.12717005
         File1289175132.jpg-(85 KB, 770x799, ardarvianpriestess2.jpg)
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    Not to self, don't save any LG dominatrices in OP's DM's games. Might get awkward later.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)19:15 No.12717033
    >>12716975

    Yes. And Skuld would be a dorf loli who builds steam-powered warmachines.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)19:16 No.12717055
    >>12717033
    >dorf loli who builds steam-powered warmachines

    You have no idea how hard I just came on everything ever.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)19:19 No.12717085
    Only goddesses of sex should use sex as a "thank you". And even then, they shouldn't intend it as a "thank you". They should come down to say thank you, then get sidetracked by sex, and finally leave after the sex and forget why they came down in the first place.
    >> Thatassholewritefag !!BWiOoj5xMLt 11/07/10(Sun)19:19 No.12717087
    Don't worry about little things like what gods to worship.

    Don't be a Paladin of _________ be a "Paladin".

    A true paladin transcends the need for a god to worship or a patron to empower him. He is good not because he must or because his god demands it. He is good because he has chosen to. He is good because he is strong and others are weak thus his heart and soul demands that he protect them from the oppurtunists, the zealots, the heretics, and evils of the world that would take advantage of them. A paladin who believes himself chosen is doomed to fall to arrogance and lack of self confidence, because above all else a paladin has chosen himself.

    The gods look kindly upon your actions though you had to kill a brother in arms it is better that his blood be spilled than one drop of an innocents.

    Consider all good gods a patron and worthy of your worship, not because you follow their cuase but because theirs runs in line with yours.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)19:22 No.12717116
    >>12717005
    >dominatrices

    You know, it says a lot about /tg/ that we can be expected to not only know the proper pluralization of that word, but also use it in daily conversation.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)19:23 No.12717122
    >>12716581
    Conversion is possible in the future, but for now this was a very nice and personal thank you. At a minimum he needs to speak with a priestess of Eilistraee about things.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)19:23 No.12717124
    >>12717116
    I think it's balanced out by the fact that in a another thread, there's a guy using "penii" as the plural of penis.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)19:25 No.12717142
    >>12717116

    To be fair, I did manage to misspell "note".

    >lashind came

    Well good for him.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)19:25 No.12717148
    >>12717087
    Alternatively...

    You WERE chosen by some deity, some random act of fate, or just so happened to have grown up this way.

    Filled with rage at evil, filled with an unstoppable, impossible desire to smash the face in of anybody who speaks a lie, who uses others for personal gain, and a need to destroy corruption wherever you find it, regardless of it's source or intentions.

    Just a thought, not all Paladins are like your Paladin or even my Paladin.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)19:27 No.12717171
    >>12717087

    This is generally how I prefer to Paladin.

    Generally all LG and NG, most CG, and some select LN gods get some love from me.
    >> PaladinGuy !!0ZL3cy8TJ55 11/07/10(Sun)19:33 No.12717247
    >>12717087
    I do like the idea of paying homage to all the Goodly Gods instead of just one God. One patron God may hold a special place in your heart due to it being where you were, "Trained" in the ways of being a Paladin, but you don't just pay homage to it.

    I wonder... wouldn't you be able to pay homage to any gods with "Justice" in their portfolio? I haven't got all the DnD lore stocked up in my head, but isn't there a _________ Neutral God who has Justice in their portfolio?
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)19:37 No.12717315
    >>12717247
    paladins don't need gods, so they can practice any religion they want that doesn't involve evil acts. People like having them be religious for some reason, tho.
    >> PaladinGuy !!0ZL3cy8TJ55 11/07/10(Sun)19:39 No.12717339
    >>12717315
    Well, I prefer mine to have a religious tint to them, mostly fluffy stuff so they can have some name to call on when smiting, using a holy symbol to turn undead, swearing an oath of some sort, or simply just because I can.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)19:48 No.12717470
    They drow goddess was just happy you saved her followers. That was all she cared about. Pelor probably would agree with saving the girls but leaves you to your own judgment about how you did it.

    You shouldn't switch deities because you were rewarded by another deity for doing something of direct benefit to that deity and not to your own deity. You got a divine "good game" from someone, no reason to give up what you believe in because of it.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)19:55 No.12717593
    >>12717470

    Just wait until you get a "good game" from Kord.

    Couldn't walk straight for a month.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)19:56 No.12717617
         File1289177817.png-(252 KB, 458x470, yourbodyisnotready.png)
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    >>12717593
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)19:57 No.12717635
    Imagine if Pelor sensed you considering switching gods because of that and next time you did something good he came down to earth and fucked you to try and convince you to stay loyal.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)19:59 No.12717661
    >>12717593
    Kord's idea of a good game is sending a bronze locust swarm to eat your kids.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)19:59 No.12717668
    >>12717635

    Don't Let the Sun Go Down On Me takes on a whole new meaning.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)20:00 No.12717670
    I'd let Cayden Cailean have me. I'm able to admit that.

    Guy is pretty GAR.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)20:03 No.12717726
    >>12717668
    "No, Pelor, no!"

    Even worse: your actions have caused him to try this with some unsuspecting paladin as a kind of pre-emptive strike.
    >> PaladinGuy !!0ZL3cy8TJ55 11/07/10(Sun)20:04 No.12717739
    ....

    >Drow deity gives Paladin a "Good Job" fuck.
    >Kord is going to fuck you.
    >Pelor is going to fuck you.

    Stay classy /tg/... stay... classy...
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)20:04 No.12717741
    >>12716581

    Nah. It was a nice reward, and that's about it. It doesn't mean you were cheating on your God. Wear the pendant, give thanks, and go about your task.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)20:05 No.12717744
    You are now imagining Pelor as Willie Pete from Empowered.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)20:06 No.12717761
    >>12717744
    Goddamn it, don't ever mention Empowered. Now I'm going to be thinking about DEM LIPS azll day.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)20:06 No.12717768
    >>12717726
    Paladins turns blackguard and vows to hunt you down after the situation is explained by Pelor. Pelor would stop him, but he feels too awkward about the whole thing and doesn't want to make anything worse.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)20:07 No.12717775
    >>12717670
    yeah the Drunken Hero is awesome
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)20:07 No.12717785
    this is why Ravenqueen is the new death god
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)20:07 No.12717788
    >>12717744

    So, paladins of Pelor skullfuck their enemies to death?
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)20:08 No.12717801
    >>12717726
    He could send big titty angels out, or aasimar.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)20:08 No.12717808
         File1289178539.jpg-(117 KB, 371x1000, Cayden_Cailean_by_nJoo.jpg)
    117 KB
    >>12717775

    That's the thing....

    He could give you the best sex of your life and the next morning he won't even remember what he did.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)20:09 No.12717819
    >>12717788

    I'm not saying it's standard practice.

    I'm just saying it's a viable option.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)20:12 No.12717852
    >>12717775


    Cayden likes traps in canon. True story.

    Calistria grows a dick sometimes. It counts.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)20:36 No.12718089
    >>12717852
    source?
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)20:39 No.12718118
    >>12717852
    What books are good for pathfinder fluff? Would like to read about the setting, even if I will not use the system.
    >> I like alignments !!zCDnoQ1ejCk 11/07/10(Sun)20:41 No.12718136
    >>12716581
    >So, my paladin banged a drow Goddess for being a good fellow. I wonder if I should say goodbye to Pelor and follow Eilistraee instead.

    Yes.

    In Faerun, proper aftersex etiquette requires you to adopt the female as your patron diety.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)20:46 No.12718191
    >>12718136
    It depresses me that this could be true.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)20:48 No.12718212
    Too many players and DMs look at D&D with monotheistic beliefs.

    D&D worlds are polytheistic settings. For followers of other gods to pay respect to friends to their gods, is not uncommon. For normal believers, it is not uncommon, even expected to pay tribute to several gods.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)20:49 No.12718233
    >>12718136
    Step 1: Be girl
    Step 2: Fuck a male god
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)20:51 No.12718248
    I kept on waiting for the "Then I fell" moment. Where is it?
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)20:51 No.12718250
         File1289181091.jpg-(175 KB, 1680x1120, PZO9226-Numeria.jpg)
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    >>12718089
    >>12718118

    Gods and Magic has some basic info on the gods. Super in-depth articles are put in the adventure path books themselves, like 2 per AP. The Calistria article pointed out that her gender is fluid, if that's what was being talked about upthread. Kind of like a nicer, non-evil Slaanesh, I guess.

    If you're looking for basic fluff info on the setting as a whole, the cheapest book is that softcover gazeteer book, the name of which I can't recall. The hardcover Campaign Setting has more in-depth detail, but they're releasing a revised version of it next year, I think.

    If you want specific fluff for a specific area, culture, or genre or whatever, they've got a lot of specific products. No clue how the quality hold up across all of them, but what I've read I liked.

    Just wish they weren't so hesitant to do a book about Numeria out of fear that people would go "ZOMG NO SCI-FI IN MY FANTASY". Pic related.
    >> Cerebrate Anon 11/07/10(Sun)20:51 No.12718251
    >I saved two drow girls for JUSTICE
    >Drow goddess gave me all kinds of sex as a reward
    >Wat do?

    "All in a day's work, Ma'am."
    Continue Questan for JUSTICE.

    If the court had given you a reward for serving JUSTICE, you'd have thanked them and continued on. So it is with drow goddess pussy.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)21:25 No.12718652
    >>12717801
    more like ASSIMOAR
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)21:26 No.12718660
    >>12717593

    Because you did your job and killed on of your brothers in faith, regrettably, and didn't get a pat on the back from pelor you want to switch to Eilistraee because she said thank you for doing something nice?

    What the hell kind of paladin is that? I don't think Eilistraee would want you as a paladin after that.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)21:27 No.12718684
    I think the thing here isn't that he "owes" the god for the fuck. Rather, he has just had a direct visit from a god, who obviously approves of him. Pelor's fine and all, but there is a certain intimacy (pun sorta intended) with this god that may validate the switch
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)21:37 No.12718816
    >>12718684

    No one is suggesting that he shouldn't be grateful and not let a pray to her ever pass his lips. But honestly to abandon your god (a god that is actively blessing you with power) because of what amounts to a thank you card from another god just seems, wrong.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)21:38 No.12718844
    >>12718684

    I have to admit, if a deity had shown that level of intimacy and I was interested, I WOULD seriously be considering a switch. Considering, at least.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)21:40 No.12718872
    >>12718660
    A paladin is expected to dedicate his life to the cause of good, and sacrifice that life, if need be.

    If his god doesn't appreciate him, fuck him.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)21:43 No.12718918
    >>12716581
    I'd say you should say goodbye to the group and the game. What the fuck.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)21:45 No.12718935
    >convert to Elistaree.
    >Go on crusade to redeem the drow.
    >suddenly, Drizzts everywhere.
    >oh god what have i done.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)21:45 No.12718944
    >>12718660

    PELOR DOESN'T FULFIL MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)21:46 No.12718958
    >>12718935

    >convert to Eilistraee
    >build drow harem
    >suddenly half-drow paladins everywhere
    >feels good man
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)21:48 No.12718975
    >>12718935

    >convert to Ardarvia
    >convert the fuck out of the drow race
    >loyal and disciplined drow slaves everywhere
    >this is LG rite?
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)21:48 No.12718979
    >convert to olidamaa
    >problem, deities?
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)21:49 No.12718988
    >>12718872
    Who says his god doesn't appreciate him? Pelor just isn't the type to reward someone with near immediate sex. Also, if he did switch he'd be stupid to think that he'd be doing her as a reward on a regular basis.

    The sex doesn't mean she want him to switch patrons it just means that his actions got the favorable attention of one of the less inhibited FR deities.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)21:50 No.12718996
    >>12718988

    Besides, think of all the OTHERS that she's been with, if she's handing out the girl-candy that easily.

    Thousands of spiders, dude.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)21:50 No.12719000
    >>12718979

    You're not allowed to convert to a god whose name you can't even spell.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)21:50 No.12719001
    >convert to Sharess
    >getting sex for religion is normal
    haters gonna hate
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)21:51 No.12719010
    >>12719000
    So that means all barbarians are atheist?
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)21:52 No.12719018
         File1289184729.gif-(409 KB, 500x500, 1288694432458.gif)
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    >convert to Anoia
    >eat corkscrews
    >everyone rattling drawers
    >my face
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)21:54 No.12719046
    >>12719000

    Pictograms.

    You can tell those guys worship Kord on account of the painting of a big dick.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)22:01 No.12719126
    >>12718958
    I wonder if it's possible that OPs Paladin could've conceived a Half-Drow God of Justice with Eilistraee?
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)22:26 No.12719491
    >>12719126

    Maybe that was her plan all along. If not, I doubt it, somehow I think a deity is capable of basic birth control.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)23:00 No.12719792
    >>12719491

    How the fuck do half-gods even work? Mortals with high stats and spell like abilities or divine rank 0 beings?
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)23:33 No.12720162
    >>12719792
    I'd say divine rank 0
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)23:39 No.12720252
    >>12719792
    Deities and Demigods say they're Divine Rank 0 beings.
    If this is a Forgotten Realms setting a Paladin has to follow either a LG, NG, or LN deity.
    Eilistraee is CG.
    Pelor and Eilistraee are also not in the same setting.

    On a side note, I'm rather surprised /tg/ hasn't gone into a massive rage about how some random paladin fucks a goddess just completely out of the blue, under the guise of "thank you sex", when you all go berserk whenever it's brought up that epic level NPCs have done such.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)23:46 No.12720325
    >>12720252
    Because said NPCs are author insert mary sues.

    FR allows paladins of Sune, who is certainly CG.
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)23:54 No.12720399
    >>12720252
    That's because NPCs are, well, NPCs. They're one dude writing down a story - not two dudes engaging in mutually masturbatory IMAGINATION.

    >action doadsk
    >> Anonymous 11/07/10(Sun)23:57 No.12720425
    >>12720252

    Well of all the goddesses to randomly fuck a paladin as a way of saying thanks Eilistraee is way up there on the list.
    >> Sorain 11/08/10(Mon)00:00 No.12720449
    >>12716581
    Dont think so. However, you could easly track down a priest and have a amusingly awkward conversation concerning it.

    Also, what makes you think that was actually Eilistraee?

    that aside, sounds like all is well in paladin land.
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)00:02 No.12720477
    >>12720449

    Priest probably would explain it as a metaphorical vision or something.
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)00:05 No.12720511
    >>12720477

    "So...when Eilistraee joined with me, that symbolizes waht exactly?"

    "That you tapped dat ass."

    "You are not a very good priest, Father John."
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)00:06 No.12720519
    >>12720252
    NPCs are not supposed to be important. PCs are. It's that simple.
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)00:17 No.12720630
    OP's dm would win huge points with me if it was actually Lolth.
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)00:22 No.12720684
    >>12720630

    Who is now tsundere for the paladin.
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)01:44 No.12721666
    >>12720684

    .................

    shouldnotwant.jpg
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)06:10 No.12723450
    >>12720630
    >>12720684
    >>12721666
    I think I watched that anime.
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)06:23 No.12723537
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    >>12717087
    I suck at fluff, but want to try this.

    Anyone want to make a prestige class that stacks on paladin that is basically the paladin achieving a state of ultimate purity of the mind where they realize that all good and neutral deities are essentially the same and law/chaos have a cause-and-effect relationship with each other?

    Leading the paladin to embrace the teachings of all the setting's non-evil pantheon and give blessing from them at will?

    Like a paladin reaching a divine nirvana and inner peace.

    So they wouldn't have to worry about falling from non-lawful actions, but would still have to fulfill some difficult criteria (that a DM couldn't force them to fall from).
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)06:27 No.12723560
    >>12723537
    Paladins already can't fall from non-lawful acts, only from evil ones. That being said, I kind of think what you're talking about would be more suited to a cleric, as paladins lack much of a focus on deities. Play cleric, select "non-evil deities" as your pantheon, play him like a paladin (he already has the armor).
    >> τιτυs !TCNe96dcu6 11/08/10(Mon)06:28 No.12723563
    >>12723537
    Would you still be a paladin at that point? I think that'd count as god status.
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)06:33 No.12723607
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    >>12720630
    >Paladin saves surface drow, rewarded with lawful hot dicking from a goddess.
    >"LOL ITS ME LOLTH U FALL."
    >Lose paladin levels, Lolth gets pregnant.
    >Take levels in bard and cleric of a neutral deity.
    >Lolth sends drow after ex-paladin to kill him.
    >Righteous dickings all around.
    >Lolth sends spider army after ex-paladin.
    >Ex-paladin creates Nerubians in his setting using only a spider swarm and his own semen.
    >Lolth sends her divine children after ex-paladin.
    >The males are now gay, the females are now teen pregnant.
    >Lolth gives up.
    >Ex-paladin becomes king of the drow pantheon.
    >Ex-paladin and Corellion Larethion raid Moradin's booze stash and hire demon hookers.
    >Fuck yeah.
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)06:39 No.12723633
    >Ex-paladin creates Nerubians in his setting using only a spider swarm and his own semen.

    GAHHH REALLY SHOULD NOT WANT FFFFFF
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)06:53 No.12723689
    >>12723537
    Class name: Messiah
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)07:55 No.12723959
    >>12723689
    Prestige class: pimp.

    But seriously, can anyone imagine a prestige class meant to add onto paladin that has a seduction theme to it?

    I'd love to throw my DM for a loop with that. He's used to me being the stable player that he doesn't have to worry about and I really want to have some real fun for once bard style.
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)07:58 No.12723972
    >>12723959
    ...why not just give your paladin a seductive personality? It'd be slightly less retarded that way.
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)08:06 No.12724006
    >>12723972
    Yeah, but he could probably dull it's effects if he thought I was turning it on him.

    I want something that I can complain about if he doesn't let me use the class features.
    Like I said, I'm sick of being the voice of reason in every situation!

    What about a paladin/bard with Virtuoso?
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)08:07 No.12724009
    >>12724006
    Being a paladin is kind of all about being the voice of reason.

    I think it might be time to reroll, sir.
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)11:16 No.12725105
    >>12720325
    Sune is specifically listed as THE exception to the rule, for reasons not really explained.
    That and her paladins go around more pleasuring people than destroying the wicked, if they take her paladin's prestige class the ultimate ability turns them into a fey whose purpose is just to warm people's hearts in acts of passion and pleasure.
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)11:20 No.12725133
    >>12723450

    I am now trying to imagine the opening title sequence in my head.

    It involves a montage of shenanigans involving Lolth doing inappropriate things to impress the Paladin and him being exacerbated. A Japanese woman is singing an upbeat theme song that I can't understand. At the end of the title sequence the Paladin is standing on a hill looking int Lolth's eyes as the sun is setting. Then it cuts to the title card, which is in Japanese.
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)15:19 No.12726840
    bump for read.
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)15:24 No.12726887
    >>12725133
    Don;t worry about not being able to understand the opening theme song. It has NOTHING to do with the show in any way at all.
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)15:56 No.12727239
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    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)16:07 No.12727383
    >>12727239
    You know, I'm surprised no one brought that up earlier.
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)16:38 No.12727702
    Did NOBODY in this entire thread consider the possibility that she literally was the mother of those two girls and left her holy symbol behind on accident?
    "Hey, guys, this shield I bought from the Dwarven weaponsmith has Moradin's symbol on it. OMG, I JUST MET MORADIN!"
    I am disappoint, /tg/.
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)19:08 No.12729210
    >>12727702

    I am disappointed I didn't think of that. So I prefer the Lolth options.

    >>12720630
    >>12720684
    >>12723450
    >>12725133
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)20:20 No.12730066
    >>12727702
    She might not have even left it by accident. She was naked when she met the Pali. She might have left it as part of the Thank You.
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)20:31 No.12730206
    >>12727702

    If you have sex with a female drow and it is pleasant it was Eilistraee. If you have sex with a female drow and it is painful it was Lolth.
    >> Cerebrate Anon 11/08/10(Mon)20:34 No.12730237
    Holy shit, this thread is still here?

    Amazing.

    That being said, why is this thread still here?
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)20:37 No.12730262
    >>12727702

    Better yet, she set this up hoping the dumb humie would come to this conclusion. They're so adorably dense.
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)20:38 No.12730281
    >>12727702
    >>12730066

    It sounds like she spoke Common, though? You'd think without a language barrier it's hard to excuse this kind of a miscommunication.
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)20:47 No.12730392
    >>12730262

    Drow troll you through sexual mishaps.
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)21:04 No.12730617
    >>12730392

    How do trolls troll then?
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)21:06 No.12730638
    >>12727702
    That makes it even BETTER!
    "What? A... What? No, I'm not a god at all!" That's right, you ditched your god for NOTHING!
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)22:25 No.12731622
    This thread is not yet dead!
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)23:46 No.12732702
    Drow pussy is all fun and games until you pull out and find that your cock is now covered in spiders.
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)23:52 No.12732770
    >>12732702
    It's not viable for a drow to do that. We figured this out months ago.
    >> Anonymous 11/08/10(Mon)23:56 No.12732816
    >>12732770
    Did we take into account the fact that they have poisons specifically made for causing spiders to spew from orifices?
    Surely they could change the engineering around a bit.
    >> Anonymous 11/09/10(Tue)00:00 No.12732858
         File1289278855.jpg-(305 KB, 1037x1136, 1279759317221.jpg)
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    >>12732702
    >>12732770
    >>12732816
    >> Anonymous 11/09/10(Tue)00:02 No.12732872
    >>12732858
    are they going in or out?
    >> Anonymous 11/09/10(Tue)00:20 No.12733029
    >>12732872

    Both. Spiders aren't very coordinated in groups. It's a spider traffic jam, in her vagina. No wonder she's got an attitude.
    >> Anonymous 11/09/10(Tue)00:21 No.12733050
    >>12732872
    Supposed to be out.
    >>12733029
    She seems more... you know. "Sigh, I guess it'll be like this again." Rather then having an attitude.
    >> Anonymous 11/09/10(Tue)01:02 No.12733452
    I was wondering when this thread would turn to SPIDERGINA!
    >> Anonymous 11/09/10(Tue)01:26 No.12733647
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    >>12725133

    Naw, it's J-horror. It starts off as this sweet flirtation between a seemingly gentle and shy drow woman, and the buff manly paladin; and as they get deeper into the story she starts to let out more and more of her chaotic behavior. Seemingly regretting it, every time she claws his back bloody, or slaps him for trying to show affection.

    It culminates in an extended torture-sex sequence where she transforms to her half-spider form and then brutally rapes him to death.
    >> Anonymous 11/09/10(Tue)02:27 No.12734215
    >>12733647
    Is... is that what happens in that movie? I WAS thinking of renting it.
    >> Anonymous 11/09/10(Tue)03:39 No.12734728
    This thread?
    Bumped.
    >> Anonymous 11/09/10(Tue)03:41 No.12734740
    >>12717593
    >You show me YOUR honor!
    >> Anonymous 11/09/10(Tue)05:21 No.12735180
    Drow Bitches man... dem drow bitches.
    >> Anonymous 11/09/10(Tue)06:31 No.12735502
    >>12734215
    Actually, it happens in Wicked City.

    The anime and live action movies alike.
    >> Anonymous 11/09/10(Tue)08:58 No.12736160
    Is this assuming that you are female or male?
    >> Anonymous 11/09/10(Tue)17:47 No.12739950
    >>12735502
    >>12734215
    >>12733647
    My god!
    >> Anonymous 11/09/10(Tue)18:58 No.12740551
    >>12736160

    ...Does it matter? How would it change anything if we assume the paladin is a woman? Maybe it's more likely the drow sees the paladin as a social equal? About the only difference I can think of.
    >> Anonymous 11/09/10(Tue)19:00 No.12740571
    .....
    Isn't Eilistraee an elven goddess?
    >> Anonymous 11/09/10(Tue)19:41 No.12740924
    >>12740571
    Drow are still elves. Surface drow that say "FUCK THE UNDERDARK, Imma be almost normal up here." Tend to turn to her.
    >> Anonymous 11/09/10(Tue)19:59 No.12741094
    thread is awesome
    >> Anonymous 11/09/10(Tue)20:11 No.12741188
    >>12732858
    that is a startlingly huge cunt... her cameltoe must start halfway up to her navel.
    >> Anonymous 11/09/10(Tue)21:56 No.12742154
    love this thread
    >> Anonymous 11/09/10(Tue)23:14 No.12742854
    >>12741188
    It would HAVE to be big to fit all the spiders.
    >> Anonymous 11/09/10(Tue)23:17 No.12742900
    ... And later, the paladin met the drow, again having a short but pleasant encounter, before dissapearing... and again... and again... a somewhat close yet distant relationship between them, with both members unable to stay with each other while being together...
    All of this like the everlasting dance of the Sun and the Moon, never able to fully see each other as the Earth always stand in their way, forced in this odd behavior by necessity, with only the Stars as their witnesses...
    >> Anonymous 11/09/10(Tue)23:25 No.12742977
    >>12742900
    What about Eclipses?
    >> Anonymous 11/09/10(Tue)23:30 No.12743030
    >>12742977
    Well, that's the point with Earth being between them: when the Sun would be able to see in the deep of the Moon's eye, it interpose itself between them, making them unable to truly feel each other's love.
    And the solar eclipse? It's when the Moon need to do something the Sun should not know (you know... drow stuff...)
    >> Anonymous 11/09/10(Tue)23:32 No.12743053
    >>12743030
    Isn't Solar when the moon gets int he Sun's way? Meaning the sun could see her? Or do I have them switched? Either way, one eclipse the Moon is between the Sun and Earth so the Sun can see her. (Or at least her ass)
    >> Blackheart !!d+z47tvchVl 11/09/10(Tue)23:33 No.12743059
    Ask yourself OP:

    Would Pelor hop into the bed with you? Like her?
    Would it feel good at all? Like with her?
    Would horrible sun penis burn you? Unlike with her?
    >> Anonymous 11/09/10(Tue)23:36 No.12743088
    >>12743053
    If we are speaking about astronomy, then yes, but think about it the other way: the Moon always show the same face toward the Earth, so that in this case, her "eyes" would be turned aways from the Sun completely.
    >> I like alignments !!zCDnoQ1ejCk 11/09/10(Tue)23:40 No.12743123
    >>12743088

    This is normal during many forms of penetrative sex.
    >> Anonymous 11/09/10(Tue)23:47 No.12743196
    >>12743123
    Please, I am talking about the symbol... you do not show lovers turning away to each other, it's counter intuitive. Even more, usually it mean a break in each other's trust. Try not to be anal with it... ameh, yeah it's a awful one, sorry.
    Leaving /tg/... good continuation all!
    >> Anonymous 11/09/10(Tue)23:51 No.12743232
    >>12743088
    >>12743123
    >>12743196
    I think I remember hearing a Native American story once, can't remember what tribe...
    The Sun and Moon are a bickering couple who seem to hate each other, which is why they stay away from each other. The Moon likes to keep an eye on the Sun because she doesn't trust him (which is why you sometimes see the moon during the day)
    Well sometimes Sun gets lonely. Real lonely. So he begs the moon to come to him and let him embrace her. And that's what happens when there's an eclipse.
    Never heard the story for the OTHER kind of eclipse though.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)00:08 No.12743373
    >>12743232
    They're flipping roles.

    Sun likes to be sub sometimes.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)00:10 No.12743388
    >>12743232

    That's when the Earth finally gets some.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)00:13 No.12743410
    Celestial Bodies are my fetish.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)00:31 No.12743546
    He shouldn't convert. She didn't ask him to or in any way imply it other than the hot sex. So if Eilistraee, she won't be pissed if he doesn't. Also avoids problems occuring for converting if it was just some random Drow.

    Now if Eilistraee and she kinda wanted you to convert... not converting will just show her that she has to give more encouragement.

    Win/win for not converting.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)00:39 No.12743622
    it's Ellistrae, she's a nice drow girl that you can prolly introduce to your mom if she lets you

    and you're a paladin, so just thank Pelor for letting you have a bit of goddess fun as a reward of your being a good pally and get on with your life... prolly with a pretty cool anecdote to tell folks in a party or something
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)01:31 No.12744184
    >>12743546

    If she does straight up say she wants him to convert...maybe he should hire an agent to deal with all these deities? Like, it works for NFL players.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)01:42 No.12744305
    >>12744184
    You just got Traded to Kord for a few rookie clerics with potential. Sorry,
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)01:59 No.12744455
    >>12744305
    So if a Paladin falls, does that actually mean that his patron traded him to an evil deity for a first-round draft pick and a month's worth of concentrated prayers?
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)02:03 No.12744483
    Does this make Morridin the equivalent of the Pittsburgh Steelers?

    And Vecna's the Cowboys, he just can't put a decent team together.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)02:06 No.12744502
    >>12744455
    >>12744305

    You know what? My players wanted my to run a 3.5 FR game with religious overtones.

    I may troll them now

    "But I wanna worship Sune!"

    "Sorry kid, but Tempus got first pick this go around. Don't worry about it, just botch your first crusade, go Illmater and EASE into love goddess. Easy Peasy."

    Oh god, religion is like the fucking NFL crossed with bureaucracy the musical.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)02:07 No.12744510
    >>12744502

    >bureaucracy the musical

    Tell me this is real.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)02:15 No.12744559
    >>12744184
    >>12744305
    >>12744455
    >>12744483
    >>12744502
    I love you guys.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)02:16 No.12744571
    >>12744510

    If it doesn't, I'm making it.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)02:17 No.12744582
    >>12744483

    Which makes Pelor the Packers after last week.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)02:19 No.12744599
    Thread starts with a Paladin fucking a god he DIDN'T worship.

    /tg/ thinks about the ramifications.

    It is decided that this was one of the better god for a horizontal tango.

    Then FR gods turn out to be playing some sort of reverse fantasy football with their followers.

    Is it just me or are there a lot of good threads on /tg/ right now? Has this been archived?
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)02:19 No.12744602
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    >>12744582
    PACKERS FOR THE SUPERBOWL!
    GO PACKERS!
    >> I like alignments !!zCDnoQ1ejCk 11/10/10(Wed)02:21 No.12744616
    >>12744599

    The "No, Pelor, No!" bits were probably my favorite part.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)02:28 No.12744672
    >>12744599
    It SHOULD be.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)02:33 No.12744707
    >>12744672

    I just did.

    Sadly, that means the epic thread about Ghostbusters meets Delta Green with inter office politics is getting neglected. i gotta wait an hour before I can archive again.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)02:41 No.12744757
    >>12744707
    It'll be there. That's a good one too.
    >> I like alignments !!zCDnoQ1ejCk 11/10/10(Wed)02:47 No.12744803
    >>12743059

    I think that this post in particular is the sort that I am suddenly going to remember a week from now and burst out laughing.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)02:55 No.12744854
    >Drow girl fucks me
    >SHE WANTS TO CONVERT

    Seriously, we are arguing about how important role playing pussy is to deciding religion. I mean I am all for roleplaying but man.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)03:05 No.12744944
    >>12744854
    Well this Drow may or may not be a GODDESS.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)03:32 No.12745130
    >>12716581
    You don't need to convert. I like to play my paladins as if they are trained by a particular religion but then move on to the general concept of Justice and Good, using what they are taught as the cornerstone.

    Just be grateful that some smoking hot goddess came for you and continue on the eternal quest of Good and Justice. If she appears again and has a bit of a heart to heart with you then evaluate what you might learn from her ministrations.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)03:35 No.12745152
    >>12745130
    ... What do goddesses cry out during sex? "OH ME OH ME OH ME!" Just doesn't seem right.
    >> I like alignments !!zCDnoQ1ejCk 11/10/10(Wed)03:50 No.12745253
    >>12745152
    OH GOD
    >OH MORTAL
    OH GOD
    >OH MORTAL
    STOP MOCKING ME
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)04:05 No.12745325
    >>12745152
    >>12745253
    You know, in a world where gods can and DO come down and interact with mortals... I have no idea how to answer this question.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)04:07 No.12745342
    >>12745325
    LORD AO! LORD AO! LORD AO!

    I mean, if they're in Faerun.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)04:20 No.12745420
    >>12745342
    But that sounds like "LORD, OW!" And no Goddess would ever admit to a mortal causing them pain.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)04:23 No.12745440
    >>12745420
    OVERGOD OVERGOD OVERGOD?
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)04:27 No.12745460
    >>12745440
    Admitting there's something higher then THEM would be just as bad as a mortal cock hurting their vagina.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)04:31 No.12745484
    >>12745342

    To the tune of "Here we go, here we go, here we go!"

    Fantastic. The overgod is worshiped only by football hooligans and unionists.
    >> S.T.A.L.K.E.R. 11/10/10(Wed)04:33 No.12745500
    >>12745152
    >>12745253
    >>12745325
    >>12745342
    >>12745420
    >>12745440
    >>12745460
    >>12745484
    /tg/ - Discuss EVERYTHING.
    No details left behind.
    >> PaladinGuy !!0ZL3cy8TJ55 11/10/10(Wed)04:35 No.12745511
    >>12745500
    Well... that covered my "daily demotivationals" for today.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)04:37 No.12745523
    >>12745500
    This thread is now also on it's THIRD DAY.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)04:38 No.12745534
    >>12745523

    Are you trying to make a point?
    >> S.T.A.L.K.E.R. 11/10/10(Wed)04:39 No.12745539
    >>12745523
    Yes I know. I've been reading it. For about 2 days.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)04:40 No.12745541
    >>12745534
    That the longer a thread lives the stranger and more bizarre, and awesome, it becomes.
    And there's AT LEAST 60 more posts before we hit bump limit. (What IS the bump limit now? 250?) Who knows how far down this rabbit hole will go?
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)04:41 No.12745549
    He shouldn't convert. He's a Paladin of Pelor. He made a commitment. But he CAN pay his respects to Eilistraee.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)04:42 No.12745556
    >>12745541

    Were you not here for WHM's story-time threads? The lasted like 4 days each.

    When something is awesome enough, we let it roll.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)04:43 No.12745562
    >>12745541
    Nope. There's a 2 day old Webcomic thread currently at 267. It's 300.
    So there's a little over 100 posts left.
    Oh my.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)04:43 No.12745563
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    >>12745534
    I hope >>12745523 did!
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)04:45 No.12745575
    >>12745556
    WHM? I remember a few threads lasting days each, but I wasn't part of them.
    Guys... I don't want to Jinx it, but the last week or so... The dawn of a new age for /tg/ is coming. It's like how it was when I first started here years ago, or is getting back to that.
    >> S.T.A.L.K.E.R. 11/10/10(Wed)04:51 No.12745596
    >>12745575
    >The dawn of a new age for /tg/ is coming
    This sound like a quote from some movie.
    /tg/ movie.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)04:52 No.12745602
    >>12745575
    Well I ain't complaining.
    BUCK BACK TO THE DROW GODDESS BOOTY CALL!
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)04:54 No.12745617
    >>12745602
    God, what if it WAS just a Booty Call?
    "Oh, you... you converted to me. That's... awkward."
    >> PaladinGuy !!0ZL3cy8TJ55 11/10/10(Wed)04:56 No.12745619
    >>12745617
    ...Hahahahaha....

    >markhe upon;
    Indeed, this is a mark upon /tg/. A good mark.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)04:57 No.12745624
    >>12745549
    He could pay his respects to Eilistraee's priestesses too. All her their chests.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)05:03 No.12745656
    >>12745617
    >>12745619
    That would SUCK for the Paladin! Can you imagine trying to go back to your old god?
    "So... uh, Pelor? It uh... It didn't work out... PLEASE! PLEASE TAKE ME BACK!"
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)05:07 No.12745672
    >>12745624
    "i fucked you're god"

    Imagine the reactions... wait no, don't.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)05:07 No.12745673
    Oh /tg/ you have ,y heart ALL a flutter!
    >> S.T.A.L.K.E.R. 11/10/10(Wed)05:09 No.12745680
    >>12745656
    "No way! You broke my trust once! Never again! Beside I found a new champion anyway~"
    This sound like a dating sim.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)05:11 No.12745688
    >>12745680
    But with GODS! It would be glorious!
    Change the wording a bit and people wouldn't even KNOW it was a dating sim!
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)05:12 No.12745698
    >>12745680
    PELOR DATING SIM
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)05:12 No.12745700
    >>12745680
    I can hear the Yaoi fangirls squeeing already.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)05:15 No.12745713
    >>12745680
    y u do this
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)05:16 No.12745717
    >>12745688
    >Change the wording a bit and people wouldn't even KNOW it was a dating sim!
    Dear god... you're RIGHT! Change "You've already betrayed my trust" with "You turned your back on your god!"
    Instead of shopping at the mall for gifts, fetching an artifact of power in the name of your god...
    >>12745541
    I feel this rabbit hole has turned to a dark direction.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)05:22 No.12745737
    >>12745717
    >dark direction
    >drow
    What other directions could it take?
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)05:26 No.12745754
    >>12745737

    Oh no you didn't.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)05:28 No.12745759
    OP: You must hold out. Remain truthful to Pelor, your true god. But at night, at camp, on guard duty... talk to her. Just... chat. Let her know the real you, secret thoughts and all.
    1: Those notes you are passing to your DM? Try and take a picture of his face. Epic.
    2: Going for round 2, hoo-ah.
    Convert when she comes on down and asks you to.
    And bumping epic, EPIC, thread.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)05:29 No.12745760
    >>12745698
    >>12745700
    >>12745717
    Look what you've done stalker!
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)05:33 No.12745776
    >>12745759

    Oh god. And Lolth can be the tsundere older sister option.
    >> S.T.A.L.K.E.R. 11/10/10(Wed)05:40 No.12745808
    >>12745760
    I've created a monster!
    >>12745776
    S-Stupid human! I-It's not like I care about you or anything. J-Just take this blessing and leave my temple!
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)05:44 No.12745820
    Stick with Pelor, Eilistraee is a bitch and I guarantee that was one of her less-bitchy exarchs.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)05:44 No.12745821
    >>12745759
    This will be hilarious if it turns out it wasn't actually Eilistraee, but just another drow.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)06:07 No.12745894
    >>12745808

    Hah. She courts you with gift-wrapped elves, freshly polished spider concubines, and the tattooed skin of dorfs.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)06:30 No.12745972
    >>12745672
    >>12745624
    Given Eilistraee supports naked dancing, I expect he would be honored with naked dancing Drow women.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)07:53 No.12746317
         File1289393628.jpg-(33 KB, 480x298, bollywood-Dance1.jpg)
    33 KB
    S.. stupid unworthy human defiling our most beautiful goddess. You will be punished severely for your sins.

    But first, WE MUST DANCE!
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)08:02 No.12746362
    epic thread

    somebody archive this already
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)08:11 No.12746408
         File1289394704.jpg-(124 KB, 1024x685, South-actress-priyamani-hot-we(...).jpg)
    124 KB
    >>12746317
    Suddenly wet Saree scene?
    >> The Pole 11/10/10(Wed)08:59 No.12746656
         File1289397592.jpg-(82 KB, 400x541, 1274966560871.jpg)
    82 KB
    Hmmmm this thread looks interesting.....
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)10:41 No.12747197
         File1289403682.gif-(646 KB, 384x216, 1284098207800.gif)
    646 KB
    >Open up /tg/
    >click random thread
    >'Are the spiders going into, or out of her vagina'
    >'Unholy spider traffic jam in her vagina'
    >Oh god what
    Stay classy, /tg/
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)11:15 No.12747408
    >>12746317

    A revolution without dancing is a revolution not worth having.

    ... I now want to play a Guy Fawkes inspired Eilistrae follower trying to overthrow the drow system. Or something.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)14:04 No.12748497
    >>12747197
    Did you read the REST of the thread or stop there? It gets even weirder!
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)14:35 No.12748754
    >>12733647

    what movie is this??
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)14:35 No.12748761
    So can we combine football and dating sim into one entity? Because that would be an awesome little game.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)14:37 No.12748766
    >>12748754
    Lolita, I think. Horror movie.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)14:40 No.12748796
    >>12748761
    Indeed it would!
    >>12748754
    Audition. Japanese horror flick.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)14:41 No.12748805
    >>12748761
    Sure. It's a football type deal, except the game engine is like a date sim, you want to get the deities to hand you off to wherever you want to get handed off to. At the end, you have sex with your final deity.

    The only thing I don't know about is how we could make Harem End work.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)14:43 No.12748823
    >>12748754

    Boku no Pico
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)14:44 No.12748838
    >>12748754

    Sentou Toodo Monogatari
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)14:50 No.12748887
    >>12747408
    >A revolution without dancing is a revolution not worth having.

    Are you a woman? Unless you mean dancing between bullets.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)15:04 No.12749003
    >>12748887
    You have OBVIOUSLY never seen a Baliwood movie.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)15:04 No.12749005
    >>12748887

    That's a V quote. Get a clue.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)15:05 No.12749013
    >>12749003
    I did... once. I still have flashbacks.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)15:09 No.12749049
    >>12748805

    Tsundere football players.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)15:09 No.12749052
    >>12749003

    I've often wished my life were a Bollywood movie, for basically this reason. Lots of dancing and flashy colors even when it's mundane shit people dealin with.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)15:12 No.12749064
         File1289419964.gif-(1.94 MB, 403x219, Bollywood_Punch.gif)
    1.94 MB
    >>12749052
    Then you have stuff like this.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)15:15 No.12749093
    >>12749064
    OH GOD THE FLASHBACKS! OH GOD!
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)15:18 No.12749111
    >>12749064

    Looks like Exalted: The Motion Picture
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)15:22 No.12749130
    I've seen part of one in an Indian resteraunt once. It was... Awesome. Terrific. Incomprehensible.

    By which I mean, 'Awe inspiring', 'terror inspiring', and 'not in English' respectively. I had no idea what they were dancing about, but it was colorful and cool. Take a generic action movie, and replace all fights/gunfights/explosions with spontaneously breaking into dance. Yeah.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)15:31 No.12749222
    >>12749130
    So it's like a Musical?
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)15:32 No.12749237
    >>12749222
    No! It's like- It-

    I don't even have words. I'm sorry, I just can't describe it.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)15:34 No.12749248
    >>12749237
    ... an Action Musical?
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)15:38 No.12749296
    >>12749237
    Bollywood Films are a revaluation into a higher plane?
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)15:51 No.12749442
         File1289422269.gif-(1.5 MB, 357x194, Bollywood_horse_slide.gif)
    1.5 MB
    >>12749296
    Yes. That's exactly it.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)19:31 No.12751586
    >>12749005
    I'm pretty sure it was an Emma Goldman quote first, or at least a paraphrase.

    V quoting her makes perfect thematic sense though.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)20:27 No.12752212
    >>12749442
    >sees .gif
    I... but... WHAT?
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)20:31 No.12752266
    >>12752212
    Don't question. If you think to hard about it your brain explodes.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)20:45 No.12752404
    >>12716581
    Well, like my mother said, never dip your pen in company ink.
    I could see problems banging your employer. Forget to get her some flowers or some shit on the way over, and BAM. Fallen paladin.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)20:55 No.12752494
    >>12752404
    I have a hard time seeing that unless... well, do goddesses have a 'That Time of the Month'?
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)20:58 No.12752528
    >>12752404
    >>12752494
    And now back to Drow Goddess sex.
    The Circle is complete!
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)21:03 No.12752596
    >>12752494
    Lolth's been on hers ever since she became the spider queen.
    >> I like alignments !!zCDnoQ1ejCk 11/10/10(Wed)21:20 No.12752766
    >>12752596

    Yes, and as we all know, the blood of Lolth is made out of spider.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)21:33 No.12752924
    I...want to run a Bollywood paladin/Eilistraee/Lolth romance/action musical campaign now...
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)21:34 No.12752935
    >>12752766
    >>12752596
    You know... I'd date Lolth. Give me a bottle of rum and I won;t even care if shes all... spider form either.
    speaking of rum...
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)21:35 No.12752942
    >>12752924
    That would be the BEST THING EVER!
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)21:36 No.12752963
    >>12752766
    ...which explains why the spiders come out of the vagina.

    IT'S ALL COMING TOGETHER.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)21:38 No.12752983
    Honestly? Slap a couple of extra arms on them, and Eilistraee and Lolth really do seem like they would fit into the Hindu pantheon. They just have that feel.

    I'm kind of curious about where this can be taken now...
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)21:39 No.12753002
    >>12752983
    Only 35 more posts to bump limit. It better go somewhere fast.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)21:40 No.12753011
    >>12752924
    >>12752983
    Eilistraee and Lolth probably know every fucking position in the Kama Sutra
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)21:41 No.12753016
    >>12752983

    Wait, wait wiat wait!

    Eilistraee and Lolth are dual aspects of the same deity.

    Both are in love with the paladin.

    Paladin has to make peace with and restore harmony between the goddess' dual nature? Possibly has to explore different aspects of his own god to join in harmonious union with both?
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)21:41 No.12753018
    >>12753011
    And WROTE half of them!
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)21:42 No.12753030
    >>12753016
    Elistraee and Lolth can't be different aspects of the same Deity, Elistraee is Lolth's daughter by Corellon!
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)21:42 No.12753033
    >>12753002

    Shit, I got work. I am saving this idea though, whether it bears fruit tonight or not.

    Drow work off a caste system, perhaps? Makes sense, kind of. But how should it be set up while showing the touch of both Lolth and Eilistraee?
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)21:43 No.12753040
    >>12753033
    If you're actually going to do it, you should probably add Vhaeraun too.
    >> Dr. Baron von Evilsatan 11/10/10(Wed)21:44 No.12753044
    >>12753030

    Gods DO work that way, in every polytheistic religion that treats them as more than just really powerful people.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)21:47 No.12753072
    >>12753018
    Well, elves are pretty kinky that way so you're probably right, Anon, you're probably right.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)21:47 No.12753075
    >>12753030

    Eh, if it gets in the way of awesome, ignore it. This is pretty much building them into something different anyway.

    Plus it wouldn't be the first time a god's lover and daughter were the same....

    Which puts it right up /tg/'s alley, am i rite?
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)21:49 No.12753090
    >>12753075
    Yeah, but Araushnee didn't become a total bitch until well after Eilsitraee was born. Plus weren't she and Vhaeraun twins?
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)21:52 No.12753128
    >>12753016
    >>12753030

    Either way, I would watch/read the shit out of that.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)21:53 No.12753138
    >>12753128
    With one you get a pretty awesome (if non canon) story.
    With the other, wincest!
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)21:55 No.12753165
         File1289444156.jpg-(172 KB, 1294x1680, PZO9529-CoverArt.jpg)
    172 KB
    This needs to happen.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)22:12 No.12753336
    >>12751586
    See? I knew there was a woman behind it somewhere. Real men only agree to dance, begrudgingly, because their girlfriends/wives want to do so. Dancing is a horrible social atrocity.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)22:31 No.12753570
    >>12752924
    Or.... you could produce Bollywood paladin/Eilistraee/Lolth romance/action musical...THE MUSICAL
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)22:42 No.12753710
    >>12753336
    You are a bad person and should feel bad.

    And have obviously never danced with a woman.


    The Bollywood elistarae/lolth/paladin actionmusical should be done. Make it happen, excellen/tg/hostwriters.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)22:45 No.12753761
    >>12753710
    Something so mind boggling would need it's own thread.
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)22:45 No.12753775
    Wait...what if pelor sent the drow goddess to bang the paladin as his reward for doing the right thing even if other followers of pelor say otherwise, and the goddess left the amulet to screw with the paladin since she is after all lol drow...YOU JUST FUCKED UP!

    *This baniment

    captcha says it all
    >> Anonymous 11/10/10(Wed)23:10 No.12754064
    >>12753761

    Indeed, but my writefaggotry is weak at best. Someone, someone with talent do this!
    >> Anonymous 11/11/10(Thu)00:14 No.12754807
    >>12753336
    You're white, aren't you? Anyone with a soul likes dancing.
    >> Anonymous 11/11/10(Thu)00:28 No.12754968
    >>12754807
    Not him. I'm the whitest guy I know. I wish I could dance.
    >> Anonymous 11/11/10(Thu)00:31 No.12755007
    >>12754968
    I feel ya bro. I LOVE dancing, but kind of SUCK at it.
    >> Anonymous 11/11/10(Thu)00:33 No.12755028
    >>12755007

    Swing dancing was made for white guys. Shit's cash, yo.
    >> Anonymous 11/11/10(Thu)00:36 No.12755070
    >>12755028
    Ska kids ruined Swing.
    >> Anonymous 11/11/10(Thu)01:13 No.12755512
    >>12755070
    Just ignore them and swing your own way, bro.
    >> Anonymous 11/11/10(Thu)01:52 No.12755906
         File1289458357.jpg-(49 KB, 225x195, 1261967548995.jpg)
    49 KB
    >>12752924
    >> Anonymous 11/11/10(Thu)01:54 No.12755917
    >>12755512
    Woah man, I don't swing that way.
    >> Anonymous 11/11/10(Thu)02:13 No.12756116
    I can't even map where this thread has gone anymore.
    Also, this is it's 4th day.
    >> sage sage 11/11/10(Thu)02:15 No.12756147
    STOP reposting your BORING copypasta. You story is NOT interesting. You suck. Stop
    >> Anonymous 11/11/10(Thu)02:16 No.12756154
    >>12756147

    >implying he's reposting

    This is the same thread brah.
    >> sage sage 11/11/10(Thu)02:23 No.12756215
    >>12756154
    4 days later is is bullshit copypasta. whatever.

    also, fuck you.
    >> Anonymous 11/11/10(Thu)02:24 No.12756222
    >>12756215

    Pass brah, even I'M not that desperate.
    >> sage sage 11/11/10(Thu)02:27 No.12756242
    >>12756222
    You appear to be desperate for this lameass thread to continue. You must be the OP wanting to make sure your incredibly gay thread (3rd/4th iteration now?) continues. give it up already.
    >> Anonymous 11/11/10(Thu)02:28 No.12756257
    >>12756242

    Not the OP brah, I just like pissing off sagefags
    >> sage sage 11/11/10(Thu)02:30 No.12756273
    >>12756257
    You fuck with EVERY sagefag ever? Doubt it. Why do you care about this thread at all?
    >> Anonymous 11/11/10(Thu)02:31 No.12756282
    >>12756273

    Nah brah, just the ones I find.

    I care about this thread because you're here and you're a sagefag.
    >> Anonymous 11/11/10(Thu)02:36 No.12756309
    kk no sage, you pathetic douche. This thread need to stop showing up. It's lame, you're lame. Fuck off already.
    >> Anonymous 11/11/10(Thu)02:37 No.12756312
    >>12756309 Fuck off already.

    Why? You're the one who keeps posting.
    >> Anonymous 11/11/10(Thu)02:44 No.12756368
    >>12756215
    1. scroll up to OP post
    2. check date
    3. realize your mistake and fuck off
    >> Anonymous 11/11/10(Thu)02:45 No.12756377
    >>12756368

    slowpoke.bmp
    >> Anonymous 11/11/10(Thu)02:59 No.12756468
    Prepare yourself, as this shit never fucking happens.

    I am apologizing on 4chan... Sorry, *I* was being a drunken douche and I was wrong.

    Doesn't change the fact that this thread is gay and should have died DAYS ago though.

    you're still a dick. grats. Oh look, my douchebaggery continues. Shocking. aaaand I',m done.

    ps: you got fucking trolled. hard. douche.
    >> Anonymous 11/11/10(Thu)03:00 No.12756478
    >>12756468 you got fucking trolled

    Wishful thinking brah
    >> Anonymous 11/11/10(Thu)04:17 No.12756907
    Well those last 13 or so posts where... interesting.
    >> Anonymous 11/11/10(Thu)04:21 No.12756934
    >>12756478
    Well, we kinda did. His trolling posts were the last straw that finally pushed the thread over bump limit.
    >> Anonymous 11/11/10(Thu)04:22 No.12756943
    >>12756934

    Giving him too much credit, the thread was already dead anyway.
    >> Anonymous 11/11/10(Thu)04:38 No.12757030
    We are getting off topic from the terrifying and amazing fact that is Bollywood. I'm going to try and run a all-bard campaign with people spontaneously breaking into dance now. It will be a pale immitation, but it will be the best I can do.



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