MY GOD WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO MY EYES THEY'RE HUGE!!

I CAN SEE FOR MILES!!

Damnit, this is as interesting as GirlfriendQuest, but I'm going to sleep now.

Kneel naked before Adrienne.

>>7452095
>Supplicate ourselves before Adrienne and pledge ourselves into slavery as her vassal and pet.
Fix'd.

>>7452072

but girlfriendquest was crap?

> Your vampire sisters are awash in cold, unnatural beauty, but in your own case, your hair seems to have faded in colour, while your eyes .. reflect something inhuman.

I think this would be pretty easy to make from the pic. Reduce the size of the corneas, add fatigue marks under the eyes, reduce the color in the hair, maybe add some stray hairs to make her look unkempt... if the right balance is struck she would seem just a tad off but still cute.

Sadly I have no shooping skills.

>>7452109
Was it? I only saw the first few posts. Just like I'll only see the first few posts of this one, because I should be asleep.

It was a nifty idea, though.

>>7452115
This is GirlfriendQuest. The original poster of GirlfriendQuest simply started with two routes - one where we wanted to become a powerful sorceress and the other where we killed some hulk in our home right before our boyfriend arrived because the hulk wanted to rape us.

During our search for power we got attacked by that Vampire Lord.

Try and figure out if we can carve a message for our (ex?) boyfriend into the flesh of our next victim.

Well, since the vampire lord said he was going to watch Adrienne's torture session tonight, it would be best not to keep him waiting. Who knows, maybe with him around Adrienne will not be so cruel. Maybe.

>>7452188

Adrienne provides you with your victims. She usually tortures you to the point where your need for blood to heal your wounds becomes uncontrollable. Then she throws you something to eat. By the time you recover your senses, you've got a corpse in your arms. Usually a child, just because the look on your face amuses her greatly.

You don't even know how they dispose of the dessicated husks..

>>7452243
>>7452263

Go to wherever Adrienne is for torture. Try to act broken, blank expression, staring straight ahead, reacting as little as possible.

Your act of supplication almost surprises Adrienne. She's more used to seeing your blank, despairing face shuffle resignedly to her torture chambers.

As you kneel, you feel her long fingers stroking your hair, almost tenderly.

"Ah, the kitten learns her place," she coos, faintly.

She then grabs you by the arm and takes you to the dungeon for The Master's entertainment tonight. Tonight there is a barely restrained fury as she tosses you on the cold stone altar face down .. taking the silver knives and carving alien patterns deep into the skin of your back. You fight the urge to cry out, but she knows her art well - your first scream comes out the moment you realize that the dull scraping sensation is the knife's edge grinding against the very bone of your ribcage. behind your heart.

Your master watches impassively, not bothering to hide his obvious arousal.

Adrienne forces your head down against the cold stone altar, now slick with your own.. blood? ichor? as it runs down your flayed back.

The "dinner" watch on in horror.

"Sing for the Master again," Adrienne whispers. You feel her hand around your ankle, parting your legs.

Try to start rubbing yourself mechanically, as it seems to be what's expected.

You only realize it when the knife reaches your knee.. that she's just cut your left leg from ankle to knee, ripping through skin, muscle and tendon so fast that you didn't even feel it!

Now as you feel your own blood seep away and your vision start to blur you feel those dreaded, ice cold fingers reach higher, crawling up your thigh.

You start to feel.. the thirst, the need to heal, the need to .. feed. A moan escapes your lips.

"Hungry, little one?" she asks.

Your master watches quietly.

>>7452366

Use the 'Dominate' discipline to make her jump up and down in place.

>>7452421

Say yes as quietly as possible. Repeat it softly. If Adrienne leans in far enough that you can get to her without needing your legs, go for her neck.

>>7452405


You clamp your thighs around her hand. She just laughs.

You move your hand between your legs and rub yourself mechanically. Your body feels as if aflame from the incongruity of sensation.

She laughs again, less harshly this time.

>>7452478
>>7452481

She pulls away from you.

"Louder. Master can't hear you!"

obey or defy?

>>7452478
Why? She's an older, stronger vampire, what would biting her on the neck accomplish?

>>7452511


It would impress the Master and show him we've stil got spirit.

>>7452507

Defy her. If for no other reason than to enjoy the fight.

IF SHE WILL TRY TO BREAK ME, I WILL FIGHT HER UNTIL I DIE FINAL DEATH!

>>7452524

More or less. He's getting off on lesbian torture, lets see if role reversal does it for him.

I'd say defy, mutter something softly.

>>7452524
I'll buy that. Let's mess this bitch up. At the very least it'll stop this creepy BDSM vibe the story is giving off now.

>>7452528


In your weakened, bleeding state, you're not even sure you can defy her.

Let's test your will power. 3d6, roll high.

rolled 3, 5, 4 = 12

For freedom

rolled 6, 4, 1 = 11

FOR THE REPUBLIC!

rolled 6, 4, 3 = 13

For the DARK GODS!

rolled 4, 3, 4 = 11

MY LIFE FOR AIUR

>>7452572
>>7452577
>>7452586
>>7452618

If we cannot defy her with these, then we will surely not escape our fate.

>>7452628
But we must, to make right all the bad things that we have done.

>>7452674

...we must.

I LOVE YOU THREAD, BUT YOU ARE DIED.

bump for related to interests, etc.

>>7452572
>>7452577
>>7452586
>>7452618

"If.. If he wants me.. to speak.. " you whisper hoarsely, your vision blurring, your hair caked with your own blood as you struggle to stay conscious... "He should ask me himself."

You feel your fangs extrude as you launch yourself forward, aiming for the neck. However with your wounds and her surgical severing of vital tendons and muscles , you fall short , landing face down on the floor instead.

You hear her screech , as if deeply offended, and you're sure she'd rip out your heart, but amazingly as you brace for the killing blow, the Master speaks.

"Enough!"

Adrienne reels back, a look of hate in her eyes.

"You will rest tonight, my dear."

"But i must punish her temerity!" she half-chokes back in surprise.

"I will do so. Myself." the master says. You feel him stand up and walk to your fallen body.

Everything goes black for a while.

When you wake, you find yourself still in the torture chamber. Your wounds have healed, and the familiar coppery taste of blood in your mouth both sickens and fills you. Someone must have fed you blood , thus enabling you to regenerate and wake up.

You feel sore between the legs.

Master looks down on you. "Ah, you've noticed." he says ,laughing cruelly.

"That was a most entertaining display of defiance, my little one. I knew you had potential."

As his hand run down your chin he continues. "Of course, that was a very rude thing you've done to Adrienne. And I've punished you on her behalf. Used you without sharing. It's fair enough for someone so weak."

What is your response?

>>7452932
Anything is better than being her toy for another night.

Thank him.

>>7452674


god damn you, why must you remind me!? ;____;

>>7452932

"As you say, Master..."

>>7452932

"So, what is your plan? Have me kill by boyfriend? Have him kill me? Or are you just enjoying yourself until something interesting happens?"

>>7452953


you prefer being raped while half-dead?

>>7452967

Raped while unconscious is slightly less unpleasant than tortured while wide awake yes.

I say we do what we always do after the torture sessions. Cry and cry and then go summon some shit.

>>7452962

"Good. Adrienne's lessons are well learned, I see. Better learnt than those you've been getting from books!"

>>7452958

"Ah. Him. He would probably be on his way here. Simple minded fool."

He looks at you, a look of amusement in his eyes. "Have you kill him? I could compel you, but there is no amusement in there, is there? Maybe if you asked, begged and pleased me, and did it well enough, maybe I'll let you do it"

>>7453015

Ask him why he thinks he'd need to compel me to attack the neglectful sword swinging dickbag who's the reason I'm in this mess in the first place. Explain I was looking for the power to do that myself before he first met me.

>>7453083

I use this but as a lie.

>>7453087

What's that saying? The best lies are the ones that have a little bit of truth mixed in?

Either way if it gets him to take us under his wing, we might avoid more cutting sessions with head wife, and might get a chance to doublecross him down the line.

>>7453087
More like a half-truth. I mean that was what we were doing, gaining power. Still, we love him. Our boyfriend that is, the rapist vampire pig is dead as soon as we learn enough to summon and control a god damned astral daeva.

>>7453087
>>7453083


"Because, dear bride, betrayal is in your very soul." He laughs. "Oh, I've seen the way you lay eyes upon me, upon her. I've given you the greatest gift and still you cannot defy your treasonous nature."

You bite your lip. Perhaps his words have some truth i them.

"We are kindred spirits, you and I. Always looking for power. Always wanting more. Not caring about means, only ends. One day you'll come for me, and it will be glorious.

But that day, " he says, speaking slower, more menacingly now. "is far away."

"Now go. Your books miss you."

As you open the door to leave, the first time you exit the chamber of your own free will, you see Adrienne standing there. Looking at you. Not saying a word, just staring coldly at you. You hurry past her, wanting some distance from your master .. at least for the night.

>>7453168

Alright lets go see our minions, our cube isn't going to make itself.

>>7453168

I go to my books. I seek to learn a message spell to send a message to my boyfriend.

I say we go talk to Rhiannon. Maybe she can help us, or at least comfort us.

ok, books, rhiannon, or minions?

>>7453168

Head off to the books and practice summoning.

As you pass Adrianne mutter "Not the first, not the last".

>>7453201

Why? it is a foolish hope. Even if word hadn't yet reached him that you were set upon by vampires, leaving him only to mourn your passing, what love could he have for you now even if there was a chance in his heart to think you still lived? You are human, and living, no longer. What man could find comfort and solace in the night-walking dead?

>>7453248
Get the sprite working on the books, then talk to Rhiannon.

>>7453270
>>7453251

you could feel adrienne stare daggers into your back as you walk away... but still better than the real ones in your back! A little triumphant smile crawls into the corner of your lips before you remember your situation.

She enters her torture chambers, the heavy steel door closing slowly shut - despite her own rage, it must have taken great respect for the Master to still close the door slowly like that.

books - what do you want to study?

Something that will let us manipulate the environment. We should show increasing dominance in each torture session until we are able to turn the tables on Adrienne.

Like I suggested last thread, a spell that will throw the lashes back at her. Telekinesis maybe.

>>7453306
Last night, I think the general idea was to try and find a way to strengthen are control over what we summon, or lengthen the amount of time we can keep them bound to us.

Also, order the imp to protect the sprite at all times.

>>7453306

Necromancy or alchemy

>>7453306

If she's rattled she might do something stupid. And anything that lowers her favor with the master is worth it. Even if she kills us, fuck it, that's a win.

What are the options for study?

>>7453306
>books - what do you want to study?

Let's read about vampires... we need to learn about ourselves.

Rhiannon looks up at you as you sit next to her. She smiles and nods, you notice she has a curious eye on the wizard's notes in your hands - a herbal recipe for dulling pain.

Her hands turn the page of the book she was reading, and she looks at you again, as if asking you what you want

>>7453366
Wouldn't it be easier to learn from Rhiannon. Not only could she teach us a thing or two, but we could also develop an important friendship, and ally. That and we need a friend after all that has happened over the past little while.

Well I'm being outweighed by the summoner votes, but I still think it should be applicable during our torture. That's when Adrienne asserts her dominance over us in front of the Master, so that's where we need to strike.

Learn Halt Undead. That'll learn 'er.

>>7453393
First we should learn if there's any other purpose in what are they doing to us other that their entertaiment.

>>7453352


there are a lot of dusty old books in the library. you suppose a mage must have owned this place. There are books dedicated to the common paths of magic - combat magic, summoning lore, the alchemic healing arts. No books on undead lore that you've seen so far.

>>7453393
>>7453387

Talk to Rhiannon about Vampires and the master. Ask her how long she's been here, general background stuff.

And suddenly sicing a horde of horrible biting things on Adrienne might be dramatic enough to impress the master.

>>7453435
we should learn magic missle, and then use it until we win, which shouldn't take long

>>7453456
>Rhiannon

We shouldn't belive her. It's now rather obvious that Rhiannon is the good cop, while Adrianne is the bad cop.

>>7453457
I think we already know that spell. If I recall correctly, we fired it at our pixie friend before she got her neck slashed by our imp.

>>7453517

TRUST RHIANNON

>>7453457


You do know Magic Missile, you've used it..

>>7453456

She's stopped counting the days since she was turned. She shrugs, suggesting that after a point, you'd stop caring.

She has a regal bearing to her, but when you ask her if she's nobility she only shrugs, as if to say such things were no longer of importance.

The book she's reading is a very thick treatise on the history of the land. You suspect she'd been reading it over and over again, judging by the wear and tear.

You notice the half-empty goblet, no doubt drained of blood earlier. Rhiannon motions towards an unused chair next to her. Perhaps she wants to allow you to read with her.

>>7453591

I'll take the seat offered.

>>7453613

Sit next to, and try to finger, Rhiannon.

>>7453591
Try to somehow ask her (she's mute but she can still read if telepathy fails) fi they tortured her too, why are they keeping her there,, if there were other brides and if so,m what happened to them Also if shoe could tell us more about our condition. Try to be as nice as possible

She smiles as she sees you take up the seat. Hours pass, with neither of you saying a word,both seemingly engrossed in the books - yours a magical book, and hers, that history book.

Sometime around what you suppose is 3 am, she quietly gets up and stands behind you , idly peering into your notes. Leaning down, she quietly brushes several locks of your hair away from your face before retying it into a neater pony tail.

You look up, surprised at this unexpected attention. Seemingly unconcerned with your reaction, Rhiannon takes a quill , letting the ink drip away from the tip before scribbling in a word in your notes.

She gives your shoulder a squeeze before she walks away.

You wonder what all that was about, then you notice that she's added an extra ingredient into the list of ingredients for the enddurance potion - "nightshade root"

She doesn't answer when you call her.

>>7453683
>You wonder what all that was about, then you notice that she's added an extra ingredient into the list of ingredients for the enddurance potion - "nightshade root

We should ask that little funny guy we summomed about that. I bet that she wants to put us out of our misery...

>>7453683

Brew the potion, drink it.

I have no fucking con score. What is it going to do? Kill me?

>>7453742

Seconding

>>7453722
Vampires are immune to poison. Still, should ask the imp about it, or the sprite or mirmir.

>>7453755
sounds like a plan

>>7453773
>Vampires are immune to poison.

Wouldn't that make "dull pain potion" worthless? We are corpse after all, our body no loger works. And while we might be imune to poisons, I doubt that we are imuine to magical alchemical potion that burns like florine trichlorine in contact with dead flesh.

>>7453868

Ain't going to kill us, either way.

>>7453722
Even if it does put us out of our misery? Still drink it. We don't want another child's life on our hands without having tried to do anything to stop ourself.

>>7453900

Total nihilistic despair is fun that way isn't it?

>>7453868
If we're immune to a potion that dulls the pain, we'd also be immune to that pain itself due to deadness. And since that isn't the case (due to torture), we must assume that the potion will work.

>>7453900
That wasn't our fault. Anyway, they are gonna find new toy sooner or later, so it makes no difference.

Besides, if she fucks us over we can always burn what seems to be he favourite book.

Ok seriously what the fuck.
Chair leg.
Sharpen.
Kill headbitch.
Take her head to vampire master and scream "THERE CAN BE ONLY ONE!"
fucking hot.

>>7453926
We have no understang about how our undead body works, yet we gonna drink first shit that untrustworthy servant (don't let us get fooled by her acting all nice and meek. Trust no one should be our motto) of our tormentor give us.

>>7453978

TRUST
DO IT THIS GUY LOOKS LEGIT

>>7453978
No, we still make & drink. If it kills us, blessed relief and no more Vampiric unlife. If it doesn't work (or works in a bad way), we know not to trust Rhiannon anymore. And if it works, it will be good.

>>7454011
>If it kills us, blessed relief and no more Vampiric unlife.

Our vampiric unlife sucks only because we are enslaved by head vampire.

"Will this work?" you ask, tossing the modified list of ingredients to your collected minions.

It hems and haws, while your hair is blowing into your face from the chill night air.

"Well, as you know, alchemy is the utilization of the gestalt result of various items, most natural some not so... These all look like sleeping and resting herbs to me, of course that's if you take them separately.. combine them and i don't know.."

Your killer imp looks up to you and shrugs "it should work! The alchemic properties sound about right!"

"And if he's wrong I'll gladly avenge you and kill him," says your assassin imp.

"Go ahead and listen to that silly brown thing, " mocks your mimir. "Fat lot he knows! A herbalist! pah! If I had an ass, he would be it!"

"Enough!" you groan, as your minions suddenly silence themselves. "Make it so. By moonrise tomorrow, I want you to make this for me," you say, poiting to the imp. "You, " pointing to the sprite "gather the ingredients."

"We can't refuse!" says your imp.

You pause to catch a breath. Not that you even breathe now, but it's nice to be outside.

What now?

>>7454046
The reason for it sucking does not mean that, at this moment, it does not suck.

Besides, it's not like we're TRYING to kill ourself. Just accepting that, in our current state, the risk is worth it.

>>7454087
What is head vampire doing now I wonder...? Let's find out!

>>7454122


. you WANT to go back to the torture chamber?

Try to find a book on the summoning and controlling of massive hordes of weak, expendable, and easily replaceable Minions, learn how to summon a few large close-combat powerhouses to provide heavy melee support to your horde.

Try to bind a mid-level Demon to act as a General and/or final boss for any adventurers who stumble into the castle.

Go show them off to the Master.

This, of course, takes second on our list of priorities to learning how to be less submissive during torture sessions.

>>7454087
Outside! We attempt to fly, just to see if we can due to vampireness. Then we try to run a distance and see how fast we are now... It's 'Vampiric Power Learning Montage' time.

>>7454169

You do have access to a lot of summoning books. however, your skill with magic is pretty shitty, and at least once it's led to tragedy. You're NOT really up to summoning Demons yet.

>>7454144
Yeah. Head vampiren said that betrayal is in our very soul. Lets "betray" him, preferably with spike to heart and followed by fire. Then dump remaining ashes into running water

4 am now game time.
Go in and sneak a peek at the BDSM vampire sex, or outside and see what you can do?

>>7454195

that was a WARNING, he'd be expecting shenanigans!

>>7454199
Let's peek. We need to know as much as we can about them before we strike!

>>7454199
Outside. The more we kfind out about what we can do now we're a Vamp, the better.

Then just stick with the expendable hordes of cannon-fodder and put your imp in charge of them.

Also, just to clarify, does she have two Imps or one? because you made it sound like she has a specialized face-to face melee Imp and a sneaky Assassin Imp.

>>7454260


She has 1 asssasin imp, 1 non-violent herbalist imp and a talking skull mimir.

Summon a smaller, weaker Imp that specializes in stealth and order him go spy on the Master and his Favorite bride and report back what he finds

>>7454222
His observations are correct. Still being pompous overly self confindent asshole he is, he's no going to do what would every sensible undead do long ago. (exterminate us)

But we must not underestimate him. So let's just observe him for a while and wait for the right time.

And get cracking on those summoning spells, the sooner you have an inexhaustible supply of cannon fodder, the better.

>>7454236
>>7454248
>>7454279
>>7454281


You're morbidly curious what's going on in there now, but there's no way you're going to go there in person willingly - too many bad things seen and done. Still showing up that bitch was fun and maybe he's punishing her now for your little act of defiance ?

You decide to summon another imp, a chameleon imp !

roll!
1d6 for summoning
1d6 for control

roll high.

And summon a killer melee Imp to act as a bodyguard.

Use the "Increased success chance potion that your Imp concocted earlier.

We should visit that poor sprite's grave.

Amidoingitright

no

rolled 4, 6 = 10

NO WHAMMY

>>7454318

not sure if that's a good idea, you're not that good at summoning

>>7454310

the potion won't be ready till tomorrow , at moonrise.

>>7454323

"Can I eat it yet?" your assasin imp asks. "Nothing's ever tried to come close. I made sure."

You hiss out a NO, a little too harshly, perhaps.

The pixie's grave lies undisturbed.

Rolled five+ten+one=16

FOR GLORY!

Regret nourishes what small dwindling thing remains of our humanity. We should, if only later.

I was talking about the one you had your Imp make you a few days back, +20% to success chance or something similar, could have had a few extra temporary benefits, but my memories kind of foggy right now.

There should be a few books on summoning cannon fodder of varying quantity and quality in the library, go check on them later.

>>7454334
>>7454347


despite yourself , you can't suppress a smile of satisfaction as your two, newly summoned imps appear inside your summoning circle. They look at you, trapped behind the magical barrier. You reach out with your mind , making sure the connection to you is strong before you speak to them.

The one with slate grey skin must be the chamelon imp - especially as he was blue when he appeared in here. The other imp is rust-red , with long claws reaching down to its knees.

both stand little under six inches tall.

"You, go down there, tell me what they're up to .. but keep quiet!"

The other imp speaks as you take it out of the circle "ok, who do i kill? "

Your assasin imp shakes its head. "amateur," it says contemptously.

Go look up the " Easily Replaceable and Expendable Minions" sub section in the summoning spells section of the library while your waiting.

You know what we need? Some illusion magic mind fuckery.

Good idea, make your Cannon-Fodder army look bigger than it actually is.

You stand there, looking at the little patch of dirt covered with stones that mark the pixie's grave. It is getting light out here in the forest - daybreak is approaching faster than you'd like and perhaps it would be a good idea to sleep.

A single tear of regret falls down your cheek as you remember the good times you had together when you were a mortal woman.

a tugging at your leg interrupts you from your reverie. Your chameleon imp has returned after half an hour.

"well?" you ask.

"Can't get past door, sorry," the little creature says. " I just hear lots of screaming and laughing.. then just laughing, man says maybe tomorrow the little one goes hunting."

"Keep talking, :" your mimir sneers, "distract her another half hour and then the sun will rise. The last thing this foolish vampire will hear is my laughter as I watch her burn! burn ! burrrrrrnnnnn! HAHHAHAHAAHAHHAA"

You half-seriously flip the mimir skull upside down, which doesn't please him very well. You tell him you hope it rains and his skull cavity fills with water. It wails in despair.

I've got to leave soon. Is there a place I can read this later?

>>7454462
Head inside, I guess... looks like we're being taken hunting tomorrow.

We shudder at the implication.

I'm saving this whole thing to an open word document to be archived later.

>>7454488
wtfrudoin

Are you trying to troll?

>>7454462
Tommorow we hunt. But what? Maybe our boyfriend...

I'll title it "VampireQuest" so it'll show up on a Google search.

No I'm not trolling, I'm just making sure that this thing is archived.

>>7454529
Still trying to figure out what you need to word document for.

usually archived on suptg.. or anywhere.. whatever.

Easy way to save the story as it goes until it can be stored elsewhere.

Unless you know a better Archiving method?

Kind of a NewFag here.

Request archive.

>>7454583
Not to seem hostile but you should probably lurk more. If you keep on the way you are people are just going to keep thinking you're a troll.

Oh, Thanks.

Archiving now.

Back to the story, head inside and start looking trough some books on Vampire hunting techniques.

>>7454668
I'm thinking that you're fourteen, a troll or a fourteen year old troll.

>>7454668

You're metaphysically bound to sleep in your coffin when the sun rises.

Sorry, only started going to 4Chan two days ago, I assure you I'm not a troll.

Archived on suptg.

we should name our minions.

Pacifist for the Herbalist, Tiny Terror for the killer, The Chameleon should have a sneaky name, like Silth, the assassin can be known as dynamo (Just because it's cool) and we'll call the mimir Emergency Chamber Pot (E.C.P. for short) no need to name the numerous cannon fodder.

>>7454779
I note that you didn't deny that you were fourteen.

>>7454805
Would you have believed him if he did?

I'm 14, no biggie

Can we please get back to the damn story now?

>>7454856
Before he posted >>7454779 I might have.

Who gives a shit?

Ignore 4Chan Faggots, turn the mimir right side up and head inside before the sun rises.

well that's one more night ... let's see what tomorrow night would bring.

Did we spend the day reading up on cannon-fodder summoning?

>>7454947
Do the kitchens have some kind of vampire version of Funyuns? If so, we should get some of those.

If the mimir gets named anything other than Morte I will be disappoint with everybody in the thread.

>>7454992


boo, cliche.

someone else can take over, gotta go to class...

Morte sounds a lot better, you could just threaten to ditch him in the bottom of a latrine, skull cavity up, in the nearest village unless he learns some manners.

Also; can never have too many minions, as long as you can keep them under control.

>>7455021
Cliche? CLICHE?

Try classic, Sir.

I'll cover for you for a few hours, but then I'll have to hand the reigns to someone else.

>>7455035
What is the funyun status?

You sigh, turn him right side up, and head back into the castle.

You enter the library, big windows with no curtains, damn.

You decide to gather up as many books as you and your minions can carry back to the safety of your room where you can study for the rest of the day undisturbed.

You only have time to make one trip, will you carry up information on summoning or more pain-dulling spells?

Decide, you twenty minutes until the sun rises.

>>7455097
First, I get off the train. Then I investigate whether the kitchen has funyuns.

There are no funyuns.

18 minutes.

>>7455112
Can we MAKE funyuns?

You don't have enough time.

17 minutes.

Anyone else here besides this guy?

>>7455124
Roll 3d6 for finding Funyun recipe in kitchen.

Onions will have to be collected, along with vast quantities of oil for frying.

16 minutes...

Funyun recipe found, but you don't have enough time to cook them.

15 Minutes...

>>7452051
Gather onions outside for Funyun making while the sun rises.

rolled 1, 5, 5 = 11

>>7455135

>>7455169
OH! Not sure if good.

With barely any time left you and your minions grab as many summoning books as you can and hurry up to your room.

How many onions would we need to make a decent batch of funyuns?

You glance down at the handful of onions, recipe, and bottle of oil you carried with you, maybe later tonight. For now, study.

This doesn't make any sense. If we're able to up and studying, why can't we be down in the kitchen making funyuns?

>>7455211


'cause the GM is 14 and a newfag

>>7455228
It's kind of cute how he REALLY wants that hoard of summoned minions and is willing to railroad us into it.

>>7455241
its like i'm really playing fourth edition

>>7455268
Why do you lie so? 4E doesn't have funyuns.

>>7455282
Man, its conclusive, I'm never playing 4e.

3.5 has homebrew rules for Funyuns, right?

>>7455318
3.5 has homebrew rules for everything. Even the things that don't need homebrew rules. Maybe even especially for them.

Time flies, and before you know it, night has almost fallen.

You have been engrossed in reading about the summoning of a peculiar kind of minion.

They stand at a little over one foot tall, have red skin, bright yellow eyes, razor sharp claws, long fangs, drooping, dog like ears, stunted horns, and a short barbed tail.

According to the book, they are far weaker than even the lowliest Imp but are summoned in group of five or more, even those who have no magical training what so ever can master them, if you have any magical talent at all then Upgrading the summoned minions to be faster, stronger, and more intelligent as well as bringing them up to two and a half feet should literally effortless, minions brought into this world even by a novice sorcerer gain the ability to hurl fireball at their enemies.

You are interrupted from your reading by a knock on the door. You risk a glance out of your shuttered window, nigh has fallen, the hunt will begin.

You wish you had time to make some funyuns earlier, but doing so would require walking down a hallway full of large windows with no covering aside from glass, for a vampire, suicide.

you gather your five minions and approach the door.

I'm going to have to skip out for the rest of the day, just keep this thing from going 404 until VampireQuest get's back, Okay?

Good Luck.

>>7455524
Haha.

Wow. It is stunning that we mysteriously found exactly what you wanted and that these little critters are so powerful. What a fortunate turn of events. And so unexpected too.

Upon further examination you notice two pages stuck together. You carefully pry them apart and discover a way to summon the swarm-imps with black trenchcoats and dual-wielded katanas. You can even give them eyes that are purple or different colours if you wish.

>>7455701
Only dual wielded katanas?

I was hoping for dual wielded katanas +3 or dual wielded poison katanas.

Ignore katana imp-horde and search desperately for Summon Funyun spell.

Failing to find a Summon Funyun Spell, use sneaky ninja prowess and horde of imps as a shield to make it to the kitchen for Funyun creation.

>>7455840
Unlike regular weapons katanas don't get the benefits of +bonuses. It's a bit like trying to add 3 to infinity. It just can't get any higher/better.

>>7455840
Can we make out with the katanas?

>>7456003
Oh my no. But the katanas might be willing to make out with you.

I was enjoying this quest, but then......

>>7456036
It will all go back to normal once the OP gets back.

>>7456036
Reminds me of when i found my friend in a bathroom while he had a nosebleed.

...and he had sneezed...

OH GOD! THERE WAS BLOOD IN THE SINK, BLOOD ON THE MIRROR, BLOOD ON THE FLOOR, BLOOD IN HIS ENTIRE FUCKING FACE AND A LARGE FUCKING PILE OF BLOODY TISSUES! OH GOD, OH GOD, OH GOD!!!!

>>7456059
He was actually firing blood from his penis.

Roll 3d20 for katana kissing.

C'mon, mommy wants a facelift

>>7456076
Disregard that, I suck cocks.

>>7456070
I'm applying a penalty of minus three katana points for botching the roll.

This is a serious quest for serious questors who know how to seriously roll and maybe even get some serious snacks that are seriously cheezy.

>>7456080
It's like you don't even want katana points.

(it's a plus! dice+3d20)

>>7456091
But Funyuns aren't cheesy, they're funiony!

rolled 9, 19, 16 = 44

>>7456205
Yeah, that last one totally doesn't count, it just hangs out in that field after I fill it in. Damn autofill.

rolled 4 = 4

>>7456214
You and the katana start making out. You lightly run your tongue down the flat before bring it back up to tip and giving it a quick flick with your tongue. You gently caress the firm, hard hilt and guard. You wrap your slender fingers around the hilt and squeeze while you continue to kiss the blade. Using the palm of your hand you gently massage the pommel and coo sweet nothings at your sweet katana love.

The katana shifts lightly in your hand, gradually become more and more animated and restive. As you run your lips down the flat the blade tenses suddenly, and moving the edge away from your body it spasms several times spraying slivers of metal across the room.

For a few moments the katana lies still, seemingly spent. BUT THEN IT LUNGES FOR YOUR NECK.

Contested strength roll: Roll 1d20.

Clearly the katana has been weakened from its exertions.

>>7456329

QUICK JAM IT UP OUR CUNT

WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS HORROR

>>7456340
YOU HAVE TO DETERMINE WHETHER YOU CAN HOLD ONTO THE BLADE OR IF IT BREAKS FREE FIRST.

YOU STILL HAVE ROUGHLY A 20% CHANCE OF FAILING.

>>7456329

Wat.

Part of me feels sorry for VampQuest and his little 14 year old questkid.

The rest of me is too busy laughing to feel sorry though.

>>7456036

you mean you enjoyed disgusting lesbian vampire bdsm you sicko

attempting roll

> Part of me feels sorry for VampQuest and his little 14 year old questkid.


why

rolled 7 = 7

>>7456337
An imp dashes in between your neck and the katana!

>>7456464
Because I just used the SUPER AMAZING SKILLS of my writing degree to author what amounts to katana porn in his quest thread.

>>7456476

Less talk, more cuntana

>>7456476


after reading some of the stuff he wrote earlier in this thread, I don't think he minds!

So uh, did the quest guy just leave and tell someone else to continue? and... I... what the fuck?

No seriously, what?

>>7456473
I am tempted to take away three strength points for botching the roll which would result in a failure, but I will be lenient. Let none say that this is not a merciful quest. NONE.


Sensing danger, one of the swarm-imps darts in between you and the katana. The imp is imapled on the blade and the katana tries to twist into your neck. However, you manage to maintain your grip on the sword causing it to miss. The blade sails up over collarbone and past your neck. The impaled imp hits you in the shoulder and slides further down the blade, it emits wet mewling noises and rank viscera. Its little impish sunglasses are cracked and pale blue blood leaks down its trenchcoat. It reaches up and runs its claws lightly over your cheek and then stops moving.

WHAT DO?

>>7456572
Chide katana for felling one of the best 5-minute katana-imp-hordlings ever to serve under your watchful tits.

Hold funeral rites for the fallen imp.

THIS ENTIRE THREAD

You hold the katana aloft and tell it off most severly for its actions. You look deep into the wavy lines of it multiple-folded steel and tell it:

"Sword. I am disappoint."

It reflects the light from a nearby sconce causing it to shimmer most insubordinately.


Firmly holding onto the hilt with your dominant hand you slide the imp off of the sword and prepare him for his funeral rites. By ruining some high quality linen with a ridiculously high thread count and expensive price tag you are able to clean most of the blood from the corpse. You straighten his little trenchcoat and sunglasses. Although, looking at the sharp cracks running through the bright orange triangular lenses you feel melancholy knowing that there's nothing you can do to fix them. But at least they'll be straight.

You feel the need to say something. Something touching hopefully.

ROLL 2d30 FOR SPEECHIFICATION

>>7456603

the katana pouts, but after the funeral when you rub its hilt against your pussy, its attitude starts to change.

I like how this got derailed. We should no longer allow quests in /tg/. Only hardcore 40K and D&D trollfests.

>>7456773
Is it really derailment if the driver gets onto the speaker system and says, "Hey. I've got other stuff to do, one of you passengers take over" and then jumps over the side?

>>7456804


he did the same thing when it was still girlfriend quest too...

>>7456828
Son of a bitch. Do you think he's going to come back soon? It's 4:30 here and I was hoping to get some sleep.

...well, must admit that I wasn't expecting someone else to seize control of this quest, although upon reflection that's exactly how I started running it in the first place.

I am inclined to run things from where I left off, if only because things seem to have rapidly devolved under the latest administration. OP didn't do too badly, I suppose, though he trampled several implicit plot points I'd had planned. Does anyone have a significant opinion on this?

>>7456854
It's your quest, brah. Do as you please. Perhaps this was all some kind of horrible fever dream to use the most horrible retcon device ever?

>>7456854
'
hey, I got tired of waiting for you so I "went what the hell, lol... "

You can carry on from here or go back to the original thread..

>>7456854
>>7456903
>>7456905
We're like the three Questcateers! Or something. In any case, I am going to sleep. IT IS 4:35 AM.

GOODNIGHT. Sorry for butchering your quest further.

>>7456918

I was one of the anon playing this since it was Girlfriend Quest, it's just too much fun to quit. it's utterly retarded but the way the first gm played it with a totally straight face made me LOL

One to two days, I said. Patience is a virtue, you know.

Anyway, don't worry about messing up the quest; it's not as though it's some fantastic work of art. I'll make a new thread in a bit. Going to discard this thread in favor of my own plots, though; feel free to run with it as an alternate continuity or whatever.

>>7456961


we're on the internet! one day is too long!

>>7456854
You can't go back now, just create a plot device that neatly eliminates the dual-weilded katana imps and puts us back into the BDSM-vamp-lesbo-fic we were doing before.

> puts us back into the BDSM-vamp-lesbo-fic we were doing before.