I lol'd. Where'd u find this

Slut Patrol says, "Hi, I'm actually funny."

Subtle reference to Wounded Knee?

>>8672263
God. Fucking. Dammit. I shouldn't have laughed at that, I should have better self-control that this.

>>8672491

>Slut Patrol

OP: It's on a blog called ThunderSpoons short stories of the 41st millenium or something like that. The dude that does the blog posts on my 40k forums. anyone else have any warhammer comics you lol'd at?

>>8672572
source?

>>8672601

I found it ages ago wandering the net...I would seek more of it but am afraid to type "slut patrol" into any search engine

in closing...THRILLER NECRONS!

sauce?

>>8672601

...
...
...

>>8672601
>>8672624

http://1d4chan.org/wiki/Slut_Patrol

didn't turn out as bad as i thought

/r/ing "What's it powered by?" "Prometheum, of course." "...oh." "Nah, I'm just kidding. It runs on COCAIIIIINE!"

delivered

Slaanesh = comedy

>>8672724
...is there a reason that last panel turns me on?

Cultist is our queen.

40k comic thread is go!

>>8672739
Cuz you're normal. Grats.

Here's more cultist.

>>8672724
Superior

>>8672739
Might have something to do with this.

These are great.

/r/ing anything to do with Uncle Dardle

this is all I have of him

>>8672765
God, Ultramarine X is a dick.
<3

Elevatus!

Can't forget about "Lost in Space".

I hope you all appreciate these because saving and uploading them is a pain in the ass.

>>8672971
I dont get it. Why did he AWESOMEFACE?

oldy but goody

Fuck the flood detection here is like 30 seconds goddamn.

Makes me remember the good ol' days of DelayClose.

Skipping 20 because it's boring.

>>8673030

>>8673094
...That doesnt help.

holy shit this is like if they found a way to make the bastard child of megatokyo and ctrl-alt-del into some kind of mime with 40k face paint

>>8673108

I like how the Real World 40k guy does womens' hair.

>>8673153
the hell was that on the motor cycle?

And that's all I got. There's a 29th comic but it's building into another "arc" and it's not funny at all.

>>8673165
It was a squat.

Don't you know ab

>>8673182
Is there a series here?

>>8673194

Yes, but because it's by Mr. Culexus, he only gets like three strips in before his short attention span sets in and he moves on to another project.

>>8672820
Oh hell yes. Trust Fucklaw to be an advocate of the best snackfood known to man.

>>8673234
Fuklaw-kun! Fuklaw-kun! Is peanut butter on my celeryu heresy? nyoo~~

Love, from Corea

>>8673262
>you spin me round like a record
SQUAD BROKEN
SQUAD BROKEN

FUCK YOUR LD8
SQUAD FUCKING BROKEN

>>8673262

What the fuck?

>>8673262

Wait, is that some kinda Korean comic? Do they like 40k over there? Can we make them stop?

>>8673296
That's not fair, there are good art from Korea

>>8673262

Holy fucking asia....wtf is this??

>>8673262
...y u do dis korea?

Leave it to Korea.

What the hell.

>>8673262

I'm impressed. That somehow manages to be mildly more disturbing than that picture of a woman actually fucking herself with a chainsaw somewhere further up the thread.

>>8673262
Well, that's it, internet's over, everybody go home.

Leave it to Korea to derail a thread...

>>8673262
>you spin me round (like a record)
THIS IS THE MUSIC OF HERESY

ONLY THE EMPEROR'S HARMONY HARMONY OH LOVE CAN SAVE US

pretend the heretic is an ultramarine, of which all marines aspire to be like

>>8673386
must draw squat on robot unicorn.....


THERE WILL BE NO SHAME

>>8673262
>defeat Ghazghkul
>take his klaw
>refurbish into robo penis
Yarrick is now my hero.

Well, since this thread's derailed anyways...

Can a Techprist on a Thunderfire take a Servo-Harness? What about one on a bike?

korea is the new japan

My favorite Advice Archon.

>>8673424
> on a bike
Fuck yes.
> on a Thunderfire
I don't think so - it would be listed on the Upgrades section of the Thunderfire Cannon if it were viable, if I'm not mistaken.

>>8673262
WHY IS THERE NO .GIF OF THE GUARDSMAN'S HELICOPTER PENIS?

>>8673384
lol, someone saved my Googly Dick picture!

>>8673450

This is a close second.

>>8673073
The old delayclose flood of /b/ to kill furfaggotry threads? Good times, man. Good times. I miss that ol' thing.

>>8673477

Well, I say that, but there are quite a few good ones.

>>8673456
Ok, thank you muchly.

>>8673205
Yeah, but at least they're funny, and the art is good.

>>8673506

The humor is somewhere there, but under no definition can his art be termed "good." It's sloppy and technically poor. Doesn't stop him from getting a laugh, but he draws shitscribbles, art.

>>8673558
Don't confuse "I don't like flat-shaded thick-line cartooning" with "the art is bad". You need to go subject your eyes to webcomics and recalibrate your "bad drawing" scale.

We doing an advice archon dump?

>>8673262
DO NOT WANT

>>8673598

I guess.

>>8673619
Hooray!

>>8673585

Do me a favor, for a second, and go over to DeviantArt and search for "weeaboo shitscribble." Go on. I'll wait.

>>8673637

>>8673648
hahahahahahahaha Nice.

Here's the template.

test

>>8673840
haha roll tide bro. thats completely random but i love it

>>8673840
Looks like it works.

>>8673887

>>8673920

I wonder if they COULD fit a Titan up someone's ass. Hmmm.

>>8673972
I think it's a bad idea to give Creed something to prove in those regards.

>>8674049

ROFL at Litany of Litany's Litany.

>>8674049
>I-I can't...
BRACING FOR HERESY. >:[
>Just kidding!

>>8674249
I'm thinking of going Iron Hands. Is this win?

>>8674278
God damn, that would be awesome.

>>8674110
Note: Human flesh tastes much more like pig than chicken.

>>8674352
It's kind of game-y, too. If that's your thing, great. Fun fact: fa/tg/uy flesh would have especially good texture for eating because exercise is what makes muscle tough.

>>8674284
I have a two-point question.
First, why are the Iron Hands called the Iron Hands?

>>8674451

Their hands. Are made of iron.

>>8674451
Their Primarch fought a critter that coated his hands in a kind of living metal, possibly the stuff Necrons are made of.

>>8674396
But vegetarians taste better because eating meat gives the flesh a sour taste.

>>8674456
>>8674483
Okay, cool.
Second: Why are the Iron Snakes called the Iron Snakes?

And hello, Nameless.

>>8674548
Uncertain, possibly associated with their homeworld fauna. http://wh40k.lexicanum.com/wiki/Iron_Snakes

Afternoon, Crusader.

>>8674512
not sure about that, but I know that my ex-girlfriends pussy juice tasted better when she cut back on meats and ate more tofu

>>8674548
The Iron Hands add cybernetics to their bodies to make up for their shortcomings. The other chapters don't look on this too kindly, most of the time. They're the sort who'll listen to a Servitor's ramblings like the fucking gospel, because, to them, it is.

>>8674548
Because their first Chapter Master dipped his wang in a vat of molten metal to prove he was the manliest man in all of Space Marinedom.
Now all Iron Snakes perform this sacred rite of passage upon joining the Chapter.

And then they fuck the sororitas' frigid vagoos with their equally frigid Iron Snakes.

>>8674613
Our flesh, though augmented by His works, is still imperfect, and can never be as perfect as His flesh. Thus we rectify our failings with machines, for in the Omnissiah we may find the perfection that our frail beginnings denied us. Thus, through His mastery of the forge, He grants us perfect bodies. Who but a heretic would shun His precious gifts?

>>8674585
Well, that makes more sense, but considering how the Space Wolves being wolfwolfwolf, the Blood Angels being angelic blood-drinkers, the Ultramarines being "Ultra" marines, the Iron Hands having Iron Hands, the Night Lords being lords of the night, and so on and so forth...
>>8674623
...this one fits the setting.

>>8674662
Do the bionics come with warranties?

>>8674686
still waiting for the Golden Dicks

(Chaos Marines for Slaanesh)

>>8674753
They don't act any differently than normal Space Marines, so I'd assume so.

>>8673262

>>8674753
If you consider a purity seal to be a warranty... then yes

>>8674753
They don't need warranties. They're perfect.

...of course, if they DO break down, you'd have to wonder about the craftsmanship. Or the creed.

>>8674753
If the holy machine refuses to function, it is thanks to an affront given by the flesh. No well-forged augmentics will fail their master unless their master first fails them. Respect the machine; treasure the machine; for through the voice of the Machine Spirit may we attain holy communion with the Emperor through His will that we call the Omnissiah!

>>8674763
Actually, what if that's what some purity seals actually are? It'd fit in with the setting, what with rampant ignorance turning technical skills (like reading legalese) into the realm of mysticism.

>>8674800
You sound like a MicroSoft PR specialist. "It's not a bug, it's a feature."

>>8673424
The thunderfire techmarine already comes with a servo-harness.

>>8674799
>>8674800
So... what if they get hit with a lascannon?

>>8674826
You sound like a heretic.

>>8674837
Then you have failed them by not putting your flesh in the way instead.

>>8674857
What if the machine spirit is a little bitch?

>>8674857
This magos has the right of it. Flesh can be regrown, or replaced with more holy machines. Flesh begets flesh with the same ease that vermin begets vermin or pestilence begets pestilence. Augmentics are unique. No two are alike, and no one, once damaged, can be truly replaced.

>>8674840
The human form is holy and perfect, granted us by the God-Emperor. I'm surprised the two creeds don't clash over this more.

>>8674870
All machine spirits are fickle and temperamental, but it is not our place to question their will.

>>8674893
Heh, you're kidding, right? Many chapters (especially those whose gene-seed is still mostly intact, like the Smurfs) see them just this side of heretical.

>>8674893
Aye, the form is perfect, but do not mutations prove that flesh cannot be relied upon to hold that most precious of forms? A machine-arm will never wilt with age; will never become inflamed with boils or full of pus; will never wither from disuse; will never become weak the instant you most need strength. What better way to preserve the holiest of forms, I ask, than immutable metal?

>>8674924
You forgot to mention that the machine's form cannot be copied and stolen by the foul Tyranid-xeno.

>>8674924
Rust.

I've seen plenty of AdMech who no longer have human form. All those cables and wires, mechadendrites like extra arms, hands replaced with multitools, you name it.

>>8674924
Heretic! It is no longer the human form after mutation!

>>8674971
A product of improper care.

Those are ones who have come closer to the the Omnissiah in order to further assist his brothers, much like how a Space Marine changes his human form to become more like our God-Emperor.

>>8674994
And what more virtuous beacon to guide the imperfect into the Emperor's light than one who has embraced all the Emperor's ministrations, those of the spirit, the flesh, and the machine, the holy trinity of His manifestations?

>>8674986
We seek to avoid mutation, not embrace it. But it is clear you have made your decision. We will not allow you to interfere His work.

>>8674994
Do the AdMech have a concept of metal fatigue? Or do they just blame it on "improper care"?

Space Marines become LESS like our beloved God-Emperor, but they make this sacrifice with his blessing, so they're still holy. Just not perfect.

>>8673205
It's a once off strip actually, it's about the inquisitor who is Commissar Raeges' boss.

>>8675051
Metal is immortal and immutable. Fatigue is a fabrication of the mortal mind. If you have concerns about the integrity of your sacred machine, consult a techpriest at once. Better to utter a thousand unasked-for Litanies of Calming than to suffer the loss of but one sacred machine.

>>8675064
See, this is an argument I actually care about.

>dedicated to the Emperor
>half-machine
>kills those who would rebel against his will
>greater than a mortal man
>black armor
>look at the helmet
You may know this one. Is his devotion not clear?

>>8675120
>His*

>>8674986
I would rather enhance my weak human form to be more like the Machine God!

>>8675080
If metal were as resilient as you claim, you would be unable to shape it into your holy machines. It is only because metal yields to you that you can gain its blessing.

>>8675120
He is a most holy warrior! Praise the Omnissiah!!!1100

>>8675194
Gentlemen, Gentlemen. Is organic life not but another type of machine? I Quote "Everything organic we know of is simply machinery, in one form or another. Tendons replace pistons; flesh in the place of steel; blood is simply biological coolant. To deny this and shun it is more than just Mechanicus orthodoxy – it is idiocy." Who says you are not both correct?

Can we go back to which is cooler?

>>8675280
>1100

>>8675297
I second his notion.
Why not embrace both our machine aspects?
I have done so for century's until my organics have all but failed. But I am determined to last, no mater how many replacement parts it will require!

ilovethisthreadsomuch.jpg

>>8673212
*Note keikaku means plan.

can someone post a page from the Ascension book that has the reference to Love Can Bloom?

/tg/, I am going to steal this (since I wrote a lot of the machine-rants myself) for some of my Iron Hands successor homebrew fluff. I feel like this thread would be a nice "techpriest lectures neophytes" sort of thing.

I love you guys :3

In return for your dedication to the Omnissiah, I give you the one thing better than a servo skull sidekick.