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  • File : 1270879881.jpg-(143 KB, 600x880, 70c3a84f355f682bc25df3c2e3a391fe.jpg)
    143 KB Maid QUEST XIV BECAUSE WHY THE FUCK NOT Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)02:11 No.9099543  
    WHAT HAS COME BEFORE:

    Part 1: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9047710/
    Part 2: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9050315/
    Part 3: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9052773/
    Part 4: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9054492/
    Part 5: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9055966/
    Part 6: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9070998/
    Part 7: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9073610/
    Part 8: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9075194/
    Part 9: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9077019/
    Part 10: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9078487/
    Part 11: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9093599/
    Part 12: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/9096268/
    Part 13: >>9097972

    You are a young man who has suddenly come into an unexpected inheritance: a rather large mansion

    and a sizeable amount of money. However, your rather eccentric uncle has put a secret rider in

    his will: in order to inherit the money, you must:

    1. Repair the rather old and decaying house.
    2. Hire a full staff of maids to upkeep it.
    3. Have sex with at least three of them. (1.5/3)
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)02:12 No.9099572
    Loot
    Alien Repair Bots
    Mysterious Alien Sphere (0% analysed)
    Demonic Ace of Spades - Alicia's Phylactery

    Mansion Status:
    Facilities: Beachfront property
    Kitchen: Average (3 of 5)
    Decor: Poor (1 of 5)
    Gardens: Fair (2 of 5)
    Repair: PERFECT (6 of 5)
    Beach: Average (3 of 5)

    Staff
    Reginald, Your Butler (Devoted)
    Samantha, Your Head Maid (Devoted) - LOVE
    Katherine, the redheaded trap-kun (Warm 8/10)
    Felicia, the cute catgirl (Warm) - SEXED
    Jehanne, the paladin (Trust)
    Alicia, the former Demon Queen of Lust (Hostile)
    SISTER FUCKING CARMINE, THE FUCKING FEMALE FUCKING ANGRY MARINE! (Angry)
    Koyomi, your Japanese gamer science nerd. (Neutral)

    60 XP

    It is Evening of Day 6 of 30. You are talking to a figure that inspires rage, Carmine the female half-eldar space marine.

    WHAT DO?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:14 No.9099599
    >>9099572
    Genuflect.

    Seriously, tell her to pop the armor and go for a beer. She's earned a break.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:15 No.9099600
    http://twitter.com/maidquesttg
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:15 No.9099607
    >>9099543
    Eh, why not. Let's just talk to Carmine and see if we can get her to open up the slightest bit.

    We are going for full completion, right?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:15 No.9099608
    >>9099572
    Order her to calm the fuck down and put those fucking armor and weapons away when not in battle
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:15 No.9099609
    >>9099543

    Ask Carmine to teach us how to channel our inner ROOOOID RAAAGE
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:16 No.9099623
    "What's it like, always being angry?"
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:16 No.9099624
    Have her respond to our last few posts. Don't feel like copypasting.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:16 No.9099627
    "Teach me to be angry."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:16 No.9099628
    We should level up luck and skill
    then talk to Koyomi if she's around.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:16 No.9099629
    >>9099572

    You ought to include that Sister Carmine is also half vampire.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:16 No.9099631
    >>9099572

    Ask to sample her geneseed.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:18 No.9099649
    >>9099543
    If she's a sphess mahreen,
    wouldn't her sexual organs have totally atrophied?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:18 No.9099656
    >>9099631

    more like ask if she wants to sample our geneseed, if you know what i mean.

    and get her to take the damn power armor off. we have maid uniforms for a reason.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:18 No.9099661
    >>9099572
    GODDAMNIT YOU FAGGOT, CAN YOU TAKE A SHITTING BREAK, I ENJOY ME SOME FUCKING ANGER BUT YOU NEED TO QUIT MOTHERFUCKING BITCHING AND BREATHE OR SOME SHIT.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:19 No.9099665
    >>9099629
    I'd rather that were never mentioned or considered in any way shape or form.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:19 No.9099677
    >>9099665
    she was a troll character.
    meant to be a one shot.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)02:20 No.9099691
    >>9099609
    >>9099608
    >>9099607
    >>9099599
    Carmine sighs. She pops open the armor, which opens up rather like a clamshell. She climbs out and sits down on a rock.

    Without her huge cerametal powered suit, she is very small, very vulnerable looking, wearing only her black bodysuit. Also, you notice that she doesn't seem to have Black Carapace access points cut into her skin.

    "So, about the whole female space marine thing. . ."

    "The armor is Sororitas armor. I beat the shit out of a Sister to get it."

    "And they let you in the Angry Marines?"

    "They let in that cockbite Fuklaw."

    "Ah."

    There is a long pause.

    "You know, you're a maid now. You don't need to always wear this powered armor."

    "Whatever. Just fuck off." Carmine puffs on her cigar.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:21 No.9099702
    >>9099677

    no he meant the half-vampire part.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:21 No.9099703
    >>9099677

    But a half-eldar ANGRY MUHREEN was just too good to let go of.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:21 No.9099712
    >>9099677
    Rule #28 of DMing. That character who you meant to throw away? The one with no personality or potential whatsoever?

    The party loves that NPC. They'll make them an honorary member of the party, so you better get used to them sticking around.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:23 No.9099729
    >>9099691
    So... how do you feel?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:23 No.9099730
    >>9099691
    "Want to go get a drink? You've earned the rest."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:23 No.9099731
    >>9099691

    wait, we need to ask why she was in hell. and scoot closer to her while she tells the story.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:23 No.9099733
    >>9099731
    Good idea. Maybe over drinks.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:24 No.9099740
         File1270880644.jpg-(60 KB, 253x352, nou.jpg)
    60 KB
    >>9099691

    "No, YOU fuck off. You think you can match me for rage? You don't know rage. You haven't witnessed your MORNING GLORIES ERUPT IN FLAME. You haven't been tortured by close proximity to DEM LEGS and an ULTIMATE BADASS who'd remove YOUR legs for touching them. You think you're the only one with rage? I KNOW RAGE."

    Then sit down and scowl a mighty scowl.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:24 No.9099743
    >>9099691
    You're a bit calmer already at least. Common lets go get drunk or something.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:24 No.9099744
    >>9099691
    Just sit there in silence.

    That's how some people communicate, you know. Let's see if she can just relax and enjoy her cigar and the beach. Maybe get close to her. Maybe.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:24 No.9099748
    >>9099691

    "Cigars are all well and good, but there are better ways to relieve stress. I was just on my way to relieve some stress of my own, care to join me?"
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:24 No.9099754
    >>9099712
    http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/EnsembleDarkhorse
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:24 No.9099761
    >>9099731

    This.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)02:25 No.9099763
    >>9099729
    "Like a fucking faggot. First I get fucking grabbed by a Slaaneshi whore and told to guard her fucking house for ten billion fucking eternities, then I get punched out by some fuckhead with no clothes on and some naked whore following him around with a sword, then I get dragged out of the Warp and into this place, where I'm not even real and apparently the entire Imperium I've been fighting my whole life to protect is a goddamn nerd game or something. Yeah, I'm fucking fine, you cum muncher."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:25 No.9099766
    >>9099740
    This, we need to relate to her.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:25 No.9099767
    >>9099744
    Seconded.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:25 No.9099779
    >>9099763

    Take this bitch to Games Workshop or something. Get her playing 40K.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:26 No.9099789
    >>9099744
    thirded
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:26 No.9099790
    >>9099763

    "You're so tense. Want me to help you unwind?"
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:27 No.9099796
    >>9099763
    "Is it? I mean, you're here, and you had to come from somewhere, so isn't that place real as well?"
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:27 No.9099805
    >>9099779
    she will flip a table in 3 seconds.
    then crush all the figurines.
    then purge the nerds.

    actually, yes, do tell her to do that
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:28 No.9099811
    >>9099763
    "Yup. We've all had a weird couple of days. Shit happens, and we keep right on going forward."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:28 No.9099812
    >>9099763
    Reassure her that she's real, get closer the entire time.

    She just toned down her FUCKANGER, I think we might be able to get into the girl beneath it if we work at it.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:28 No.9099813
    "Wanna start a new imperium then?"
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:28 No.9099815
    >>9099763
    Yeah well suck it up and move on. Anyways if you want to get drinks or something later le me know.

    Then get in her power armor and head back to the house.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:28 No.9099821
    Christ you limp wristed bastards. The anon that won her over was the anon that outshouted wrath itself. This sensitive side shit won't work.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:28 No.9099824
         File1270880924.jpg-(126 KB, 578x600, 578px-Recursion.jpg)
    126 KB
    >>9099779
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:28 No.9099825
         File1270880927.jpg-(1.29 MB, 579x3936, 1248598543618.jpg)
    1.29 MB
    >>9099763

    "I'M TRAPPED IN A FUCKING THINLY-VEILED FAP-FICTION RUN BY A GENIUS PERVERT, WITH MY EVERY ACTION DICTATED BY SOME FUCKED UP NON-CONSENSUS OF ASS-SCRATCHING NECKBEARDS AND YOU- YOU= YOAASD'AAKD

    FUCKADA YOU
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:30 No.9099845
    >>9099763
    "Just because there's an analogous nerd game for the imperium doesn't mean they aren't real. You're here, you're real. Just think of it as a stupid coincidence."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:32 No.9099873
    >>9099857

    She loves us <3~
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:32 No.9099878
    CHALLENGE HER TO A WRESTLING MATCH. LOSERS GENITALS ARE AT THE MERCY OF THE WINNER.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:32 No.9099881
    >>9099857
    Oh, that's fucking it.

    We've just learned some kick-ass fighting skills from Reginald. Time to put her in her place.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:32 No.9099882
    >>9099857

    Okay, fuck this shit. I was against bringing Carmine back from hell in the first place, but tried to make the most of it once we did. At this point though, I couldn't care less.

    Talk to Kat.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:32 No.9099888
    BALETED
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:32 No.9099889
    >>9099857
    I think we're making progress. Talk to you later?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:32 No.9099890
    >>9099857

    "Fuckin wanna-be Space Marine..."
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)02:33 No.9099895
    >>9099873
    The post this refers to read:

    Sister Carmine glares at you, then suddenly sucker-punches you in the teeth. "Get bent, faggot. Save that fucking psychology shit for The View." She climbs back into her powered armor and walks away.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:33 No.9099899
    >>9099857
    GET THE FUCK OUT OF THAT ARMOR!

    WHAT, TOO MUCH A PUSSY TO FIGHT WITHOUT IT?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:33 No.9099900
         File1270881224.jpg-(37 KB, 220x345, 1248666635204.jpg)
    37 KB
    >>9099857

    >"Get bent, faggot," she snarls. "Save that psychology shit for The View."

    THANK YOU MA'AM.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:33 No.9099901
    >>9099857
    Oops, sorry for treating you like a WOMAN.
    -4 str bitch.

    Laugh at her and the go back into the mansion. Tell her she can sleep on the sand tonight.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:34 No.9099925
    >>9099895

    Ask her if it hurts to not be able to go back to this shitty Imperium that's ruled by a corpse.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:35 No.9099934
    >>9099895
    "Then how about a slightly more direct approach."

    Headbutt her. Forehead to forehead. Un-gentile.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)02:35 No.9099939
    >>9099901
    >>9099900
    >>9099899
    >>9099890
    >>9099889
    >>9099882
    >>9099881
    >>9099873

    General consensus seems to be to shout something insulting at Carmine as she walks off. She flips you off as she does.

    Her relationship level would change, but honestly, it's like Samantha's: stuck at ANGRY all the time.

    Who next?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:35 No.9099942
    >>9099901

    did OP delete post?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:35 No.9099943
    SLOW YER ROLL ANON. OP deleted that post, clearly he's writing up a longer one with more/different content.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:36 No.9099954
    >>9099934

    We need to make a Will save from being sucker punched by a SHITANGRY SPESS MEHREN first
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:36 No.9099957
    >>9099934
    How could I be so dumb. We're going to relate to this bitch through violence, and violence only.

    After headbutting her, headbutt her again. Even if we're both reeling from it.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:36 No.9099958
    >>9099939
    KOYOMI
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:36 No.9099960
    >>9099895
    WE FAILED.

    Excellent show, good sir! We need to fuck up, before we get too crazy.

    Like, "YEAH WE CAN TAKE REGINALD HURRR" crazy.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:36 No.9099968
    >>9099895
    And that's it.

    If Reginald's the final boss, she's the boss right before him.

    By the end of this we knock her ass out for the second time for this shit.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:37 No.9099976
    >>9099939
    Jehanne. We need to catch up with her and try to establish an idea of when we'll be able to seal the deal on her.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:37 No.9099977
    >>9099939

    KAT. WE NEED INTEL.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)02:37 No.9099978
    >>9099954
    Actually. . . it didn't hurt that badly. I mean, even if she is a SPESS MEHREEN WITH 20 STR, after you factor the -4 STR for being a woman and the further -4 for being an Eldar, she's got barely above average strength outside her powered armor.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:37 No.9099980
    >>9099939
    I give you a thumbs up.

    Well, to be more specific, I give a thumbs up to my monitor.

    Anyway, let's hit up the paladin! Koyomi's still at uni.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:37 No.9099983
    >>9099939
    Jehanne
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:37 No.9099989
    >>9099939

    Kat. We need to talk to her, its been a long time.

    We can deal with Jehanne tomorrow.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:37 No.9099990
    Offer to buy her some minis to destroy. Hint you may have some Emperor pictures as well. Mention the possibility of getting her the codex for the various other factions. Point out that she's not the strangest person among your employ.
    Reiterate getting into her pants is all fine and good (nice bodyglove), but that you still want her to be happy (though a RAGE is fine too).
    And, of course, tell her she's done a good job, and helping your maids, whether it's adjusting to life here or starting to figure out where she wants to go next, is something you want to do.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:38 No.9099999
    >>9099939
    Visit the Paladin.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:38 No.9100001
    >>9099934
    >Un-gentile

    So... a Jewish headbutt? How does that work?

    >>9099939
    Anyway, let's go talk to Koyomi. See if we can't get to know her better.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:38 No.9100003
    >>9099939
    >shout something insulting
    I choose to believe we said "love you too, you fucking pissy bitch!"
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:38 No.9100004
    >>9099978
    Weak bitch. Let's get Felicia to sneak inside her power armor and beat the fuck out of her, then boot her out of her own armor. Then we tie her to a rock on the beach and let the seagulls eat her.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:38 No.9100008
    >>9099968

    Remember how we got her to break down and start crying last time, right?

    WE PUNCHED THE SHIT OUT OF HER WHILE CALLING HER A WHINY TINY BITCH.

    This is how we relate to an ANGRY MARINE. She brings out the best in us. Let us embrace this.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:38 No.9100011
    >>9099978
    >Half Eldar
    We're going to need to get a vindicare get up and sniperan skills before we can get her then.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:38 No.9100014
    >>9099958
    ...isn't there.

    Alicia. We need to get some talk time in with her. She'll, at the very least, be more sensible than Carmine was, then again, what the hell were we expecting? She's an Angry Marine. She's from a chapter that isn't even real by GW standards.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:39 No.9100015
    >>9099978

    Oh, in that case, BEAT THE EVERLASTING SHIT OUT OF THE FUCKING ANGRY MARINE FUCKING SHITCOCKNOCKERS
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:39 No.9100016
    >>9099939
    >stuck at ANGRY all the time.

    Rather disappointing.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:39 No.9100022
    >>9100003
    From an earlier thread...

    "You're pretty strong. For an eldar."
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)02:39 No.9100025
    Current vote seems to be Jehanne?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:39 No.9100029
    so we drag our injured pride to jehanne's room. she might get all touchy when she sees the blood.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:40 No.9100039
         File1270881608.jpg-(485 KB, 872x503, One_or_A_Thousand_by_IronShrin(...).jpg)
    485 KB
    Eeeesh, /tg/ gets angry at getting resisted. Definitely an ugly side to you guys.

    Also, for Carmine, all we need is pic related.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:40 No.9100044
    >>9100025
    Yeah.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:40 No.9100045
    >>9100008

    >She brings out the best in us

    LITERALLY. Look at all the anon's saying OH FUCK HER SHIT JUST GOT REAL. This is literally what's happening.

    This is hilarious. Goshujin, I love you. Never change.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:40 No.9100047
    >>9100008
    Sort-of what I was going for, although I had a moralfag speech to tack onto the end.

    Doesn't ring true though. Should probably stick to epic penis speeches.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:41 No.9100056
    >>9100025
    koyomi
    unless she isn't back yet
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:41 No.9100057
    Jehanne, yeah.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:41 No.9100059
    >>9100014
    I'm fine with her or the paladin.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:41 No.9100062
    >>9100029
    Our pride is not injured as far as i'm concerned, we beat her in her power armor while we were unarmed and naked.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:41 No.9100067
    >>9100025

    yessir. let's roll.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:41 No.9100068
    >>9099990
    And she'll just kick us in the balls with power armor on and tell us to stop kissing her ass before she kicks our ass with it.

    Being nice with this woman is just asking for more beatdowns upon ourselves, and now that we're training with Reggie and he's going to make us go through Training From Hell since he knows we're gunning for his daughter...

    Well, frankly I think we have our beatdown quota downpacked. If anything it's time to admit we're only keeping her around to get out pent-up stress that a fap can't take care of.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:42 No.9100077
    >>9100025

    I think besides samantha we currently have the best shot with Jehanne, so yeah.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:42 No.9100082
    We should have raped Carmine when she was out of the power armor. ANGRY rape.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:42 No.9100085
    >>9100068

    She's an elf, don't we just have to lick her ears or something?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:43 No.9100087
    >>9100082

    we may yet get her to rape US. In which case, we cannot be blamed by Samantha...

    >justasplanned.jpg
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)02:43 No.9100089
         File1270881807.jpg-(363 KB, 983x1382, 240781077693f19f8cee948c5515a0(...).jpg)
    363 KB
    Koyomi will be back in the morning.

    As you come back up to Jehanne's room, you hear an odd sound. Kind of a rhythmic, slapping sound, followed by a whimper and a murmur. Then another, then another.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:43 No.9100099
    >>9100089

    BARGE IN, FEIGN CONCERN.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:44 No.9100101
    >>9100089
    She is shlicking. Peek.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:44 No.9100102
    >>9100068

    We should be fine if we hit her in the head.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:44 No.9100103
    >>9100089
    cautiously investigate.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:44 No.9100105
    >>9100089
    Horny anons are go in 3...2...1...
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:44 No.9100108
    >>9100089

    Kick down the door, take away that scourge she's using on herself, rip it in pieces, throw it in the toilet, piss on it, and flush it away.

    Then turn to her and say "Sup?" Like nothing happened.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:44 No.9100109
    >>9100089

    Either Reginald beat us to it, or there's some ritual flagellation going on.

    Either way, we must observe.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:44 No.9100114
    >>9100068
    Sell it to her like this, because it's true: there's more ways to do angry than just yelling like a drunk toddler with Tourette's and an expansive vocabulary.

    We can teach her those ways, because as a 19-year old nerd we pretty much have to know a thing or two about types of anger that wouldn't immediately get our asses kicked by jocks.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:44 No.9100118
    >>9100089
    Stealth action our way in, so she can't hide it.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:45 No.9100128
    >>9100099

    THIS!

    Act like we thought someone was hurting her!
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:45 No.9100132
    >>9100109

    If she IS making time with Reginald, just continue through the room and out the window onto the roof like that was your aim the entire time.

    Like you kick down doors and exfil through windows ALL THE TIME.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:45 No.9100134
    >>9100089

    Roll to resist temptation of going in a seeing what she's doing.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:45 No.9100137
    >>9100089
    Walk in on her.

    She didn't get to catch us fapping, it's only fair we finish turning the tables on her.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:45 No.9100139
    >>9100101
    >>9100102
    >>9100099
    I don't think you guys have thought about the other possibility of whats going on in there... but hey, lets check it out.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:46 No.9100140
    >>9100089
    Peek stealthily. "Accidentally" barge in if schlicking, gtfo if she's not alone. I suspect Reginald is laying pipe.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)02:46 No.9100141
    >>9100099
    You find Jehanne stripped naked in her bedroom. She has a leather belt in one hand, and has been using it to self-flagellate, apparently, from the red weals on her back. She is kneeling in the center of her room, biting her lower lip, and whispering to herself over and over. Sounds a bit like, "Repent, sinner, for the Lord Bahamut watches over all."

    Her cheeks are flushed, by the way, and she is trembling not only with fear and pain, but something resembling pleasure.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:46 No.9100143
    Walk in
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:46 No.9100146
    We've beaten the rage out of her before, we'll just have to do it again and then make it memorable so that she stops being angry whenever she sees us.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:46 No.9100148
    >>9100132
    >>9100109

    I doubt Reginald would intrude on our property. Otherwise his daughter would be fair game.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:46 No.9100151
    >>9100068
    Mostly just meant to make sure she knows she has options when she decides on what she wants to do. She's kinda aimless and riding the RAGE at moment after all. That being said, some semi-productive use of RAGE should be fine too.

    And check up with Kat: the general status of the maids, how Kat is doing around them, that Alicia and Kyomi bear watching, and that we're still working on ways to help her transition (could probably manage better than just a normal surgery, but that we're still hopefull of finding something better).
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:46 No.9100154
    >>9100102
    No, I mean she's raised in violence.

    She will understand entirely if we get our asses handed to us by Reggy during (which I assume will happen 99.9% of the time) only to go over to her and start randomly beating her down and yelling at her like she's beneath everything else.

    We might as well have fun with that form of communication. Might eventually end in hate-sex.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:46 No.9100159
    >>9100134
    Intentionally fail said roll.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:46 No.9100160
    >>9100089
    Walk in, say, "Tradition dictates the maids are supposed to walk in while I'm fapping, but I'll let it slide."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:47 No.9100172
    >>9100141
    I think we need to break things down for her.

    We're gonna have to work to assure her that none of her her old life matters anymore. Even her religion.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:47 No.9100178
    >>9100141

    Pain slut. Knew it.

    "Hi."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:47 No.9100179
    >>9100141

    Say "You kinky fuck."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:48 No.9100181
         File1270882090.jpg-(33 KB, 407x405, 1246940019988.jpg)
    33 KB
    >>9100141

    >but something resembling pleasure.

    yeeeessssssssssssss
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:48 No.9100184
    >>9100141
    ... I'm okay with this.

    Walk in, apologize for interruption. Ask if there's anything we can do to help.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:48 No.9100185
    >>9100141

    Draw attention to yourself. This lady's a bit out of her mind, but she may well be willing to share her reasons.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:48 No.9100189
    >>9100141
    Kinky.

    hmm. How do we approach this? Anons with greater porn game experience, advise!
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:49 No.9100194
    she's totally schlicking- but we should bust in like we're going to protect her from....we can roll for that BS when the time comes.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:49 No.9100199
    >>9100189

    I'd console we retreat and knock on the door politely. It's high fucking time that somebody ELSE have to scramble to get dressed while WE knock on the god damned door!
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)02:49 No.9100200
    >>9100184
    >>9100181
    >>9100179
    >>9100178
    >>9100172

    Jehanne looks over her shoulder at you. . . and then her eyes widen. "My. . . my liege. . . I don't. . . I didn't want you to see me like this." She turns her face aside and hugs herself tightly. "Please go."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:49 No.9100204
    >>9100141
    "Look, Jehanne, from the flushing, the whimpering, the shaking legs, and the soaked spot near your crotch, I'm going to say that this is probably counterproductive.

    Also, you do know that in many cultures sex in and of itself is what confirms something as a marriage, right? And that divorcing can be fairly easy?"
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:49 No.9100205
    >>9100141
    "You know, confessing to things is often considered part of punishment.."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:50 No.9100211
    >>9100200
    "Okay"
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:50 No.9100213
    >>9100141
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:50 No.9100216
    >>9100199

    and this time WE get to ask awkward questions: "Sounded like somebody was getting whipped in there..."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:51 No.9100228
    >>9100141
    that's fucked up.
    If this was real life, just walk away.
    But it's not, so, BARGE THE FUCK IN LIKE YOU OWN THE PLACE
    you will own it soon enough
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:51 No.9100231
    >>9100200

    lets go. Guess we don't need Kat to fill us in after all!
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:51 No.9100234
    >>9100189
    Do it classy. Walk in all suave-like while not drawing too much attention to yourself. Once in position (like, right behind her, with enough safe distance to avoid getting hit yourself)

    "I think you need to be whipped harder, since you clearly enjoy this. Want me to do it?"

    Try to sound enthusiastic as to draw attention away from the hard-on.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:51 No.9100236
    >>9100189
    Call her a slut, take the belt and start slapping her yourself. Start implying she really wants a dick in her and that the belt isn't satisfying enough and then have her beg you to put your cock into her.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:51 No.9100239
    >>9100200
    "Jehanne," Step forward, kneel down, whisper, "Look at me."

    "You went through Hell. You saved an undeserving sinner. You're redeeming a demon's familiar. You've sealed Lady Asmoday," Lay a hand gently on her shoulder, put on a pained expression, "Why would you do this to yourself?"
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:52 No.9100244
    >>9100200
    "Do you really want me to leave?"
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:52 No.9100247
    >>9100200

    ooh, awkward. we should probably go, but first tell her she's commited no sins, there's no reason to be punishing herself....

    but if it's pleasure she's after... *we start playing with the belt she's just dropped in shame*
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:52 No.9100251
    >>9100200
    >>9100204 now responds to the above.

    Also, I just had a devious plan.

    RULES LAWYER! Produce a copy of 4e, bring up the whole "Paladin can serve any god, be any alignment" thing, recommend she switch from Bahamut to Sune. Still Good, but I think she's better suited to serve the Goddess of Love than the God of A Giant Stick Up The Ass.

    Well, okay, maybe not literally, but you know what I mean.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:52 No.9100252
    >>9100200

    "Shouldn't have been loudly whipping yourself so everyone a block around can hear you."

    "Anyway, I thought you already atoned for everything in hell. What's this all about?"
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:52 No.9100255
    >>9100239
    this
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:52 No.9100259
    Ask her why she' doing this
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)02:52 No.9100261
    Okay, guys, last choice of the night. Console her, or be the evil master?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:52 No.9100263
    >>9100239
    I like this one.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:53 No.9100266
    >>9100261
    [x] Console her.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:53 No.9100267
    >>9100251
    You know what, let's go with that.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:53 No.9100268
         File1270882408.jpg-(49 KB, 700x571, 1267997471712.jpg)
    49 KB
    >>9100261
    console
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:53 No.9100269
    >>9100251
    Can't she serve both?

    Granted, it won't be a stick that'll be up her ass next...
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:53 No.9100272
    >>9100261

    do this:
    >>9100251
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:53 No.9100277
    >>9100239

    because she gets off on it, duh. That suppressed superfreak within her, warring with a modesty that may be learned, her own, or a combination of both.

    The worst thing we can do is disrespect her wishes, magnificent bastard or no. she DID pull us out of hell, you know.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:54 No.9100279
    >>9100252

    Gather information. I like.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:54 No.9100281
    >>9100261

    Do >>9100251.

    It pretty much works as both. Although not evil, just flexible.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:54 No.9100284
    >>9100261
    Console. We love our maids.

    ... Except maybe Alicia, but dammit, we're working on it.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:54 No.9100285
    looks like tonight is alienate our employees night
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:54 No.9100287
    >>9100268
    I change to console her with this
    >>9100251
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:54 No.9100288
    >>9100261
    console
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:54 No.9100289
    >>9100261
    Aughhgh, tough choice. I'd opt for consoling, but still trying to leverage it to our advantage.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:54 No.9100290
    "We've already seen you doing incredible things to repent before. And I think that wading through hell and defeating Lady Asmoday had to have taken care of anything you might have done before. So, what happened?"
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:54 No.9100291
    Good guy, console her.

    >HERPA DURP, WHY NOT PC?
    Sorry, I've got an inner /v/-tard.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:54 No.9100292
    >>9100251
    this is good
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:54 No.9100294
    >>9100261
    Console her, but mention that if she enjoys a bit of BDSM play we'd be happy to oblige.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:54 No.9100295
    >>9100261

    Both.

    Tell her she's not a sinner and that she's already atoned.

    Then say that she obviously enjoys this, and offer to help.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:54 No.9100296
    >>9100261
    Bit of this, bit of that
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:54 No.9100298
    consolation!

    It's going to be easy enough to fuck her later. My god, she is SO KINKY.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:55 No.9100300
    Anyway.
    Console
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:55 No.9100307
    let's wait to sex her until we have a soundproofed room, umkay?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:55 No.9100308
    >>9100251
    Jumping on the bandwagon for this.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:55 No.9100310
    >>9100261
    ...

    I've petitioned for dickery a lot. But I used to know a girl who had a real problem with accepting herself. She would take every problem as more proof that she was useless, and worthless. And her boyfriend loved that, used that, twisted her around his finger. Evilest thing I ever saw. She couldn't take it.

    Don't do this. Just work her through her issues, and if you can't, don't take advantage of it for fuck's sakes. That's a line I can't cross in good conscience.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:55 No.9100312
    "You know, I'm sure self mutilation is looked down upon more than having sex with a guy or two outside of marriage."
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:56 No.9100321
    console
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:56 No.9100329
    >>9100251

    Console, but do this too.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:57 No.9100333
    >>9100310

    Exactly. We assure her that there's nothing for her to repent for or be ashamed of, and then offer to indulge her perfectly healthy interest in BDSM.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:57 No.9100334
    >>9100312
    dude, you don't understand some cultures, do you?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:57 No.9100339
    >Console her

    We've taken a turn for the good for the most part, so we may as well.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:57 No.9100342
    choose both. console then evil lord option with the offering to help her "repent"
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:57 No.9100344
    >>9100333
    do
    not
    say
    that

    nothing will upset her more
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:58 No.9100356
    >>9100310

    Indeed. We are on an EPIC QUEST to come out of this a Cool Guy- fuck the chicks, get the cash, and come out the end with a semblance of moralfaggotry intact.

    We're just that awesome.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)02:58 No.9100359
    >>9100251
    Since it seems that people have decided not to do the CE thing. . .

    You close the door behind you and walk out quietly. A few minutes later you come back in, carrying your 4e PHB.

    Jehanne, by this time, has gotten dressed, and is sitting on her bed, looking miserable. "My liege, I. . ."

    You put a finger to her lips, then turn to page 90 in the PHB1. "Maybe you should consider a new deity," you say.

    You give her a kiss on the cheek, turn, and walk out.

    -----
    JEHANE GAINED A RELATIONSHIP LEVEL"
    "LOVE" flag triggered.

    -----
    Goshujin-Sama gained a TIREDNESS LEVEL
    "SLEEP" flag triggered.

    Someone archive this shit, plox.
    >> Goshujin-Sama 04/10/10(Sat)02:59 No.9100382
    Also, if you just ran to your bookshelf to grab your PHB1, take a shot.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:59 No.9100383
    >>9100310
    I've been to the psych ward when I was in highschool for injuring myself out of frustration, and I heard plenty of those types of girls talk about their issues. They're dumb and they deserve it for ignoring people who tell them otherwise with evidence to back it up.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)02:59 No.9100385
    >>9100359

    Night, my awesome GM. I sleep as well- a petition booth at a gun show is in my future tomorrow. Le fucks.

    >"LOVE" flag triggered.

    INEVITABLE. OH THE TWISTED WEB WE WEAVE.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)03:00 No.9100387
    >>9100359
    Another well-done thread. See you next time.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)03:00 No.9100389
    >>9100359

    D'awww
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)03:00 No.9100391
    >>9100359
    D'aww...

    I love this GM. Sleep well, Goshujun-Sama, and I will see you next time.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)03:00 No.9100392
    we love you OP!
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)03:01 No.9100400
    >>9100382

    Well shit, there goes my beer.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)03:01 No.9100403
    >>9100359
    >"LOVE" flag triggered

    And thus, we have proof that good things can come from 4e after all.
    >> planefag 04/10/10(Sat)03:01 No.9100406
    >>9100382

    *sets down PHB*

    *goes for vodka*
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)03:02 No.9100417
    >>9100359
    And I'll join you in sleepland.

    I gotta be at the gym by 11 tomorrow, meaning I gotta be up by at least 9:30 or so.

    See you next time you get on. Will try to bookmark your Twitter.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)03:03 No.9100426
    >>9100359
    I'm going to bed as well. I have an appointment early morning too.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)03:04 No.9100435
    Can we help her choose her diety? Because I'd vote for Lastai, of the 3.5 BoED.

    Fuck yeah Chaotic Good Goddess of Pleasure, Passion, and Love.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)03:04 No.9100445
    wait-- did we get this archived?
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)03:08 No.9100492
    Loved by two.
    Fucked with two.

    Not too shabby, and yet I still want to get the half eldar, half vampire space marine. Weird.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)03:14 No.9100550
         File1270883678.jpg-(103 KB, 603x768, phb page 90.jpg)
    103 KB
    For the fags who didn't bother looking it up.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)03:16 No.9100571
    >>9100550
    Wait.

    Then she's unaligned.

    DISAPPROVAL.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)03:20 No.9100632
    >>9100492
    Not to mention the trap we're trying to turn into a full girl, the demon loli of doomy doomy doom, and the alien that's bound to pop out at some point. Oh, and the impending epic battle of ultimate destiny with Reginald.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)03:25 No.9100682
    >>9100571
    Give her the Forgotten Realms Player's Guide. Point her towards Sune, who is both a goddess of love/beauty/passion and Good aligned.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)03:27 No.9100701
    >>9100632
    Look, once we help Jehanne finish switching over to Sune, she'll basically be Flonne.

    Which means that we can turn Alicia into Etna. Except hopefully considerably more tsundere and considerably less willing to backstab us for power if the opportunity arises.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)03:28 No.9100714
    >>9100632

    I'm not so hot for the trap but if the other anons enjoy it, I don't care much. I still hope the alien will be some kind of robot because we have the standard alien cover with our elfdar. Although I would like a gigeresque alien.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)03:28 No.9100716
    >>9100571
    If all else fails, we can go with RULE ZERO, IT'S WHAT'S FOR DINNER
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)03:30 No.9100728
    dam good sucks
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)03:31 No.9100736
    >>9100632
    I'd be happy with Koyomi ending up Friends with Benefits I admit, letting her get to play with whatever weird things happen to us should help. Also, labs and whatever else.
    Not sure what to do about Felicia, maybe just make sure she isn't mistreated, maybe uplift her with whatever else. Not sure which would be better for her.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)03:33 No.9100760
    >>9100736
    I hope we'll get everybody to love us.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)03:34 No.9100780
    >>9100714
    The whole point is that the trap is perfect personality wise; the only problem is that we're playing a heterosexual male. However, since we have a variety of possible methods to turn Kat into a for reals down to the genetic code girl, we can potentially switch her over from NOT TO BE SEXED to SEXABLE. And finish kicking her up those last couple of relationship points in the process.

    At which point, three of our maids will be devoted and in love with us. Four more to go. And we technically managed to kick Carmine up to Trust this time, even if it's permanently hidden by Angry. So our current most difficult task is going to be raising Alicia from Hostile. Fortunately, we've still three weeks and change to make all of our maids fall in love with us, so I think we've got time.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)03:35 No.9100798
         File1270884950.png-(37 KB, 395x400, Supergirl_adora_400.png)
    37 KB
    >>9100714

    Sort-of hoping that she's an alien in more of the /co/ framework. Flies, super strength, several different kinds of vision (including heat lasers, naturally), and almost completely naive about the human race.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)03:36 No.9100809
    >>9100780
    >The whole point is that the trap is perfect personality wise.

    I haven't really noticed his personality beyond tsundere and I want to be a girl.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)03:39 No.9100834
    >>9100760
    There is no "hope". There is only "certainty".

    We have more than enough love to share between seven different women. The only real question is which one of them takes the longest to swoon for us.
    >> Anonymous 04/10/10(Sat)03:41 No.9100862
    >>9100798

    Personally, I am hoping for teh rei.



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