Ahoy, Captain!

How good are we at technical science, especially that which is related to our ships system? Is there some way to do a quick system check to see if all parts are where they should be?

>>9151637
damn space-dickery!

call Jennings on the space-telephone and ask her what the hell is up with these shenanigans

>>9151715
Lonely! I don't know why but your presence in my threads pleases me.

A quick recap for those not present for RSFQ 1-4:

Captain Arthur Dent, the ruggedly handsome hero of the Coalition of United Humans, had been sent on a mission of peace to the backwater of Galabarr V. On the way, he encountered an unknown vessel and fired upon it, driving it away. The vessel had been hovering over a glad on the jungle-planet, and upon touchdown, some of Dent's men, including the loyal private (now corporal) Carter, encountered vicious beasts.

Carter was eventually used as your body double when the locals, a fearsome race known as the Zeldessi, came to you demanding compensation for your violation of their holy grounds. Being the badass you are, you went on a daring rescue mission to the heart of the Zeldessi capital city, slew the Chieftain, looted some strange crystals, got out after butchering more aliens, and eventually got laid by navigator Jennings.

Before leaving, you told the beasts to revere you as a god, which they were all too happy to do. Now aboard the CUH Unshakable for refueling, you equipped your ship, the Ironhearte, with Tesla Torpedoes and an enormous railgun. As you were recruiting some people from a seedy bar, you encountered Margot Sanders, a grizzled and skillful spacefarer, and Vincent Dallas, a rough and tumble space cowboy.

Now the station is under attack by the Jellitar, and they are looking for you and the crystals!

>>9151770
Your skill is as good as whatever you roll on the trusty old d20, my friend.

>>9151772
"Sorry Captain, that's what the radar system on the ship said. Are you sure nothing is down there?" Jennings sounds genuinely confused.

"Cap, this is really weird." Carter chimes in. He clutches a blaster in his left hand, his cybernetic hook hand twitches spasmodically.

>>9151837

I'm like some kind of retardly loyal pet who comes back every day no matter how much I get beaten.

rolled 5 = 5

>>9151867

"Carter, run a check for AISS. That's Alien Invisibly Science Stuff for you less educated people."

>>9151870
Well it is greatly appreciated, regardless.

Now, onwards to MANLY ADVENTURE!

>>9151901

Relax, I was kidding. Retro Science is the bees knees and the cat's pyamas. Or "teh shit" as the kids say.

>>9151896

Carter looks down at the built-in radartron 12 on his hook hand:
"I... don't see anything, Cap'n. I'm picking up some anomalous emissions from the coolant station across the hall from us, but you could probably chalk that up to you blowing the conduit up there in the hangar"

What now?

>>9151926
Do all the companions look right? Must we worry about horrifying JELLY DOPPLEGANGERS?

rolled 8 = 8

>>9151926

"Hm... apart from that, are there any other systems in the ship that act weirdly? If we're gonna solve this mystery, we must look inside ourself first. Deeply.

>>9151986
(I am definitely writing that down in my notebook! Thanks for that awesome idea!)

Although your redshirts' faces are all obscured by combat helmets, Dobson, M, and Carter all look completely fine and normal.

>>9151986

This, as far as we know the ENTIRE SHIP COULD BE AN ALIEN SPY!

>>9152011

You question Jennings further on the radio.

"Hmm... now that you mention it Captain, it appears we had a minor hull breach about twenty minutes ago. I figured it was the repair crew finishing up the patches they were doing on the Ironhearte!" She says, a tinge of worry in her tone.

>>9152041

Dobson chimes in:
"Suh, I'll head back to the ship with a few men and Sergeant Davenport, if you wish."

>>9152041

"Listen up, I want a full analyzis of that hull breach ASAP. Radiowave scans, X-ray, Orgon-radiaton, tentacle prints. The whole menu."

>>9152085

"Very well Art- Captain." She says before cutting the line.

Well, you and your men are in the belowdecks. The fight rages on above you, and the Ironhearte is prepped for takeoff. Will you stand and fight like a hero? Or turn tail and flee?

Your call, Captain.

Bumping with Barbarella

>>9152140

There's just one correct answer to that, and you know it.

"Boys, seems like somebody has felt free to redecorate the inside of our ship. Let's repay them. With lasers in the eyeballs."

>>9152267

I'll await a consensus, although I'm itching to hurl some aliens at you guys.

Will you stand and fight like the manly hero you are, /tg/? If you bested the ten foot tall, shaggy beasts known as the Zeldessi, you can humble a gang of four-foot jello molds with eyes!

>>9152300
You don't get women and shiny medals by running away.

Are there any corpses nearby? We could always build up a barricade.

>>9152342

Two votes for combat! Good enough for this little GM!

You tell your men to "lock and load" and "get ready to move out." They look perplexed at the phrase "lock and load," as this is the year 2018 and guns have been running on efficient battery-cell technology and superheating plasma for over thirty years. Regardless, they gear up and follow you into the central lift that leads into the main observation deck.

You immediately notice several small fires that have broken out across the various shops and depots around the massive hangar. Jennings sends you some tactical data. There are three zones where the jellies have been boarding, but one is just about sealed.

What do?

>>9152437

Any info on the two zones that might help us chose, or do we have to act on blind faith?

>>9152550

One zone is close to the repair hangar where the Ironhearte is located, the other is in the East Wing where there are more civilians who might require aid. It is that zone where the fighting is most intense. It may cost more men, but it is more heroic. However, the other zone might save some important crew and is easier to get under control.

>>9152592

Jennings offers a bit of support:

"Dent, don't feel compelled to come to our rescue. Of course, those of us on the ship aren't the hardiest troops, but I'm sure we can hold our own. We joined the CUH understanding that we may have to give our lives for a greater good, do what you feel is right!"

Well gents I need to go for a bit. Hopefully I'll be back in about a half an hour.

In the meantime, feel free to discuss what you would like to see in this quest. What do you like? what do you not like? I hope to make this quest as fun and memorable as possible for the enjoyment of all.

Thanks in advance, we'll get right back to the adventure when I return...
...Right after these messages!

Sick of eating bland and tasteless tubed meals?
Get INSTA-FEAST! the environmentally friendly gamma-ray luncheon product perfect for the whole family!

INSTA-FEAST, eat like a BEAST!

>>9152652

"Jennings, don't you and your [censored] little [censored] dare die on my watch. It would be against my orders, which says we'll all pull through this together. Captain Dent out"

I put away the wrist radio and wipe away the strange moistness in my eye. Must have gotten a piece of alien brains in it or something. I turn around to the men.

"Well, what are you standing here for? We have civilans to save!"

the irony of samefag's name is making me sad, so I had to bump

>>9153251
Well feel free to participate! The more the merrier! Tell your friends!

Anyway, I'm back now. What's the plan?

>>9153295
see

>>9152827

I'm with samefag on this one

>>9153386
Onwards to manliness!

You once again "lock and load" and head for the East Wing, which contains the medical wards, Mall-o-Matic, and housing for some vital crew.

The large, ugly, boarding tube juts into the open room through the ceiling, and Jellitar storm troopers drop in, readying their scorpion blasters (see pic). Security forces clad in white plasti-alloy armor do battle on the various tiers of the Wing, and you notice they have even deployed a contingent of old-model combat androids out of desperation. The clunky robots trudge into battle, waving their circular saws and plasma throwers with menace.

Before you stretches the top tier of the Wing. To your left, stores dot the wall, to your right, the railing overlooking the atrium gives you a view of the situation.

Suddenly, from the flames of a nearby shop, three civilians run screaming as five storm troopers chase them! They're all headed for you!

Time for action, Captain!

rolled 1 = 1

Sorry, had to take a break.

>>9153511

I pull out my phaser and point it all the jellians in the most manliest and awe-inspiring way possible.
"STOP RIGHT THERE, ALIEN SCUM!"

bump

>>9153867

You draw your phazer, which has since regained its charge after running out on Galabarr V, and attempt to point it at the aliens.

However, it slips out of your hand, falls to the ground, and accidentally discharges, rendering the civilian at the head of the pack unconscious. The other wheel around, now caught between what they believe to be a crossfire, and stand confused. One is killed as the Jellitar open fire on you, their brutal beam weapons send her flying backwards, over the railing (!).

None of your men are hurt, you all take cover in the shop immediately to your left. The last civvie follows you.

What do?

The Jellies finish off the man who fell unconscious outside. The five of them are now advancing on your position.

M chirps, "Dent, should we just open fire?" her jaded eyes shine with fearsome bloodlust, and her jetpack boosters seem to spark to life as if understanding her intent.

>>9153936

You know, I don't even need this name. You can always tell it's me by the rolls.

How does the layout look, does it look possible for someone to sneak around the shop and attack the aliens from the rear?

>>9154032

In the back, behind the counter, is a door leading to the maintenance hallway. All the shops have doors connected to it. You could flank the jellies!

rolled 11 = 11

>>9154071

Sometimes, making sure any member of your crew survives is more heroic than just charging right on.

Still taking cover, I signal to a few (how about three?) of the men to sneak around, while the rest and I stay behind to keep them distracted. Also get someone to get the civilian to safety.

Rolling for distracting phaser shots at the aliens to keep them at bay.

>>9154166

You distract the Jellies with stray shots while three men go through the back hallway. They appear in your view a few meters behind the Jellitar, who are unaware of what is happening.

M grits her teeth. "Well I won't get to splatter some greenies, but I guess I'd rather be alive."

They are in position, fire?

Roll for success of ambush!

rolled 12 = 12

>>9154228

And lose valuable information? No, time to use Diplomacy.

I step out from cover, with my cockiest, most charismatic smirk. "Okay Jellitars, the game is over. As you may notice, we have you surrounded. Obviously, that slimy gunk you have in your heads is no match for human cunning. Now, I am a merciful man so I'll give you two choices. You either hand over any weapons, surrender and tell us what happened to our reactior. Or..."

I glare threateningly.

"...I'll reduce you to particles so fine even atoms will pity you. The choise it yours."

*The choice is yours.

Damn late night typing.

Woah, I'm doing relatively well tonight. Maybe it's because Dent is actually using his brains for once, while still being a damn handsome bastard.

>>9154382

Well a 12 is a success, so I'll do what you say, Lonely.

The Jellies exchange nervous glances.
"Well... he does have us surrounded."
They toss their potent weapons to you, and raise their tentacles in surrender.
"The reactor? Well we went down their thinking you humans were using our fuel crystals. We didn't find anything, but we did plant a remote detonation device."
You glare at Carter, whose failure to properly read the scanner may have now screwed everyone over.
"However... we may be able to deactivate it we receive proper authorization from Admiral Goo-
The storm trooper behind the speaker puts a tentacle through his head, ripping out a tangled mass of nerves. He falls over dead.
"Pay no attention to him, human! He was... uh... delusional!"

The remaining Jellitar troops stand in fear of you, unmoving. You now know what you can do to save the day. If you get clearance aboard the mothership, you can negotiate with or fuck up the Admiral, and get the bomb deactivated. Once you are aboard the ship, however, the fighting will cease.

rolled 17 = 17

>>9154525

"No, I think I want to hear more about it. And if you won't tell me out of politeness, I'll just have to beat it out of your moist, squishy little nerve centres. Ms. M, care to help me show these gentlemen what I'm talking about?"

>>9154632

That was intimidation rather than actually starting a fight, by the way.

Feeling even more lonely than usual in here, but at least the dice are on my side for once.

>>9154632

Nice intimidation check!

M powers up the laser bayonet on her slugger. The Jellies shrink in fear, literally. The "leader" glares at his subordinates, but one comes forth:
"Okay! We don't need clearance! We can remotely deactivate it! Here... here I'll do it right no-
The sergeant rips out the cowering trooper's nervous bulb, killing him. However, the damage is done, and another trooper deactivates the bomb. M gleefully steps forward and carves the sergeant trooper up. All that's left is a puddle of green slime.

>>9154658

If you know anyone that may enjoy RSFQ, a little word of mouth wouldn't hurt!

>>9154692

Te remaining two troops shrink further at M's presence. They are willing to lead you to the mouth of the boarding tube, which will take you up to the Jellitar ship.

>>9154692

"Pardon my bluntness Ms. M, but you're one hell of a woman. I like that. Okay, any of you other slimeballs want the same as him, or would you prefer to surrender while you're still alive?"

>>9154727

A phlegmy, barking voice breaks in over the loudspeakers:
"Jellitar warriors! IT has come to my attention that the bomb placed in the reactor has been disabled! This is unaccepta- Oh wait, did I just say that aloud? Oh son of a Hoxnar Rumblefleeb, now they know we don't have something to hold over them! What? No! No I don't want to order a fallback! No... okay listen we'll just keep sending in troops. We're florbing cloning them in the vats as we speak! Don't give me that Jellitarian preaching! Send in more troops, damnit!"

The voice eventually cuts off. That must have been the admiral.

>>9154794

Well then, make it so. "take us to your leader, alien scum"

>>9154709
I can try, even if I'm not sure they're willing to stay up every night just in case you run the quest that night. Or do we have a schedule?

>>9154836
Well, I try to run it weekdays around the same time every night. This weekend I'm going on vacation, so I'll have plenty of time to run it in my leisure time at a more reasonable time of the day for you.

>>9154836
The Jellitar point to a motorized lift that will take you to the tube. IT is on the bottom floor, however, past a wild and raucous battle.

>>9154804

Do we have any explosives?

>>9154804
I used to have that squirt gun the chick on the right is holding. It was pretty awesome.

>>9154876
You can procure some explosives, free of charge from the armory a little ways back.

Suddenly, a loud boom announces the entrance of your hated rival... Captain Daniel Gallant. His rugged facial hair and v-neck suit (revealing chiseled pecs) are his epithets, and he blazes into the room, joining the fray.

Your eye twitches a little with barely-contained rage.

rolled 7 = 7

>>9154913

"Oh, it's you. Could you please just stay out of our way, the adults are trying to work.
Ms M, would you be a peach and help me set up these explosives all around the entrance of the alien ship? Just out of their vision, we want them to get close enough before we spring the trap."

>>9154974

M grabs some detonattion-orbs from the armory and returns five minutes later. Igniting her pack, she rockets to the entrance of the tube, placing them around the lip of the structure.

Below, Gallant blazes through the troopers, restoring the morale of the security troops below. All of the androids have been knocked out of commission, but Gallant's men charge forward with unparalleled bravery.

GALLANT! cry the men as they surge about the jellymen.

>>9154870

Oh, I can manage, just place it an hour earlier or something. Here, my mail in case in case you want to discuss stuff more in private.

>>9155037
Excellent.

Anyway, Gallant is down there stealing your thunder! The charges are all set too, what's the plan?

>>9155131
Hm... Are we on the same floor? As in, how many people can actually see any eventual explosion? Because I think it's time to give the people some fireworks.

>>9155207

If the tube explodes, all will see, and debris will rain down on the battlefield. This may terrify or embolden the troops, depending on the rolls.

>>9155238

Will it be so?

>>9155238
So we could either steal our thunder back from Gallant or eventually set him on fire? Can't see any downsides, really. What's the status on the aliens approaching? Timing is vital.

rolled 14 = 14

>>9155280

Fire in the hole!

Also preparing to either take a heroic pose for the audience or hide from view as quick as possible depending on outcome.

>>9155326

A fourth wave of Jellitar are coming down the tube now. Five minutes until they exit.

Meanwhile, the battle below rages on. Cigar tightly clenched in his teeth, hairy chest showing, Gallant blasts left and right with his akimbo repeaters. However, the Jellitar troopers are more effective than the troops you faced before, and one manages to clip him on the arm with a beam of searing energy.

Men drop left and right as sparks and explosions go up all around the two factions below. A new wave of newer-model security bots has entered through a doorway below to the north.

>>9155380

Huzzah! Heroic pose with explosion behind my back in three... two... one...

>>9155380

The tube detonates right as the most troopers were coming through the entrance. Green gel splatters the walls and men below, and debris falls all around, most of it landing on the Jellitar troopers. Only one human is struck by a bit of scrap, and he is mortally stricken.

That human happens to be the mighty Captain Gallant! Placing one foot on the railing and leaning on your knee, you call down to the men as they mop up the straggling jellies. They turn in unison to you as you swan dive(!) over the railing. Flipping multiple times, you use all your skill to grab a flagpole, do a full swing, and land atop the tallest pile of debris while striking a manly and victorious pose.

The mens' cries of triumph nearly deafen you.

>>9155439

"Just another day in the life, nothing special. Just did what I could to help out, with the assistance of my brave and loyal crew of course." I glance over at Gallant "Oh, and please see that... whatshisname gets to the sickbay. Poor sod, a victim to his own illusions of grandeour.

Ooops, seems like my shirt ripped open some more. Very poor fabric in these uniforms."

>>9155534
That's too good.

The men gawk at your grandeur. Gallant is dragged away, nearly unconscious. You make out a glare of ignominy in the midst of his throes. One man steps forward.
"I dunno bout you guys, but I'm following this man!"

Looks like your troop count has now increased. Your twenty-seven men have been joined by not only Gallant's fifty-two men, but also the sixteen security troops and the forty securidroids.

>>9155534

Oh, and we better check if the Jennings and the others are okay. Let's contact them on the radio.

>>9155607

You try to contact Jennings, but get only static.

Civilians that had locked themselves in the shops and hospital building are now filing out. They saw your bravery and cheer loudly. Now safe, they will attempt to make it to the safety lifeboats...
...in the opposite direction of the Ironhearte.

>>9155656

Your decision here WILL have consequences.

also, I sent you an email, Lonely.

>>9155595

The secret to be a good space hero is to realise the line between Heroism and barelly concealed douchebaggery is just theoretical.

Gotta go to bed now, but it's been a blast tonight. Too bad about the lack of people here, but it was one of the better episodes yet. Mostly because stuff actually went our way.

>>9155726
Pleasure to have you, my good man! I eagerly await seeing you in the next episode!

Happy adventuring!

If any bold adventurers wish to continue with the adventure I will be happy to carry on!

>>9155656

"I... I'm sorry, but I really have to run. My beloved Je... Ship is in danger. Men, split up in two groups. Group one, the largest, helps the civilians get on board. M and any elites still alive follow me. NOW!"

>>9155810

Well if no one decides to pick up the thread, then we'll leave it at this ultimatum for episode 6. This season of RSFQ is drawing to a close (I'm aiming for no more than 9 episodes), but be on the lookout for Captain Dent in follow-up adventures!

SEE! Captain Dent do battle with the hideous Voidigans!

EXPERIENCE! The thrill of death-defying feats of bravado and manliness!

FEEL! The raw emotion as Dent fights for his life, love, and species!

>>9155897

"Buy home some Retro Sci Fi Quest today, folks! It's beats getting kicked in the nards by a Mercurian battle-nun" -Lonely Samefag

>>9155939

Season 1 box set goes out in mid-june!

Anyone else on /tg/ up for some adventure?

>>9156004
I would, but I'm off work in 3 minutes and Mount and Blade is calling me with it's sweet mailed siren song

>>9156022

Not a problem, good sir!

...anyone else?

By the way, I got the thing you sent me, but I really just need to sleep right now so I'll answer it tomorrow.

>>9156084

It's no big deal, man. Take your time.

I'll keep bumping the thread for a bit before I let it die.

>>9156228

My very own spambot!

Well, here ends episode five of RSFQ!

Join me again another time for the excellent adventures of Captain Dent!

Stay classy, /tg/