[Return]
Posting mode: Reply
Name
E-mail
Subject
Comment
File
Password(Password used for file deletion)
  • Supported file types are: GIF, JPG, PNG
  • Maximum file size allowed is 3072 KB.
  • Images greater than 250x250 pixels will be thumbnailed.
  • Read the rules and FAQ before posting.
  • ????????? - ??


  • File : 1295010903.jpg-(48 KB, 478x560, eee.jpg)
    48 KB Ian !!mY2HGSLIkgP 01/14/11(Fri)08:15 No.13517103  
    >Horrible things your DM has done that in the end worked in your favor? Or not…

    Well for me I will have to give some back story. Team is set up as a group two guys, two gals and there is the DM. It is a homebrew based on 3.5e and Call of Cthulhu. Setting being a Modern fantasy. Meh.
    I roll a male human fighter of average stats. Named him Moe
    Other guy is DM’s twin brother, Rolls a Female Drow Paladin… Called it Lithe..
    Girl one rolls a Female human ranger, called it Flaya
    Girl two rolls a Male human cleric, called it Kobi.

    So we roll out. First session is pretty straight forward. Then Second session rolls around.
    First order of business is to roll a REFLEX CHECK.
    I think ‘This should be ok…’… I AM DEAD WRONG.
    DM Rolls his roll and we do ours.
    ALL 1s….
    It goes down like this: Our characters are suddenly ambushed by what are described as juggalo cultists… Yeah it was that kind of homebrew.
    Long and short of it:
    >Moe (me) gets attacked by Hellhounds and looses his arms, which are somehow replaced with mechanical versions. Then His head is turned into that of a Pigeon’s…
    >Lithe is cursed with uncontrollable necrophilia. Now has to roll a Will save when near a corpse.
    >Flaya is turned into a Mindflayer (Still female…) with none of the benefits and all the negatives.
    > Kobi is turned into a Female Kobold/Kender hybrid.

    Needless to say I learned later that the two girls ‘payed’ the DM to do this so they could have their characters the way they wanted to.
    Needless to say but The DM actually ended up derailing the adventure inadvertently when we got to a nation of bird-headed people….
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)08:19 No.13517123
         File1295011194.jpg-(38 KB, 455x600, 1249960970537.jpg)
    38 KB
    WHat?
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)08:21 No.13517129
    >Lithe is cursed with uncontrollable necrophilia. Now has to roll a Will save when near a corpse.

    Slap your DM silly and tell him to go play FATAL
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)08:22 No.13517133
    >>13517103
    "paid"?

    You mean blowjobs, right? 50 million blowjobs.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)08:23 No.13517135
    >Bribing DMs
    Why have I not thought of this before
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)08:23 No.13517136
         File1295011435.png-(14 KB, 355x394, 1289069561186.png)
    14 KB
    >> Ian !!mY2HGSLIkgP 01/14/11(Fri)08:25 No.13517142
    >>13517133
    Yes.
    >>13517129
    He was dead serious...
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)08:27 No.13517154
    >>13517142
    Even more reason to slap his shit
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)08:30 No.13517160
    >>13517142

    He'd better just be dead now. Did you murder him? I would have.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)08:32 No.13517172
    >>13517142
    sounds like a whore of a dm
    >> Ian !!mY2HGSLIkgP 01/14/11(Fri)08:35 No.13517180
    >>13517154
    Well I can't really do that because the following:

    When we got to the bird-headed peoples' land, the enter party but me got arrested.
    I had been mistaken for a messenger/bounty hunter which we later learned Lithe had killed. Go figure...
    Then I was given some jobs to do around the major city. Inadvertently the others had gotten out of jail and were running around town.

    Session three begins and it is has been set up as the trio vs me. I am set up as the BBEG...
    They have sided with the juggalo cult...
    They make some horrible rolls and find themselves in the lair of a incubus and his mates... Being Fucked to death. I am teleported in for no reason and given one roll to either destroy this little world or leave.
    I say high roll to leave.
    Natural 20.
    They Die and have to reroll normally.
    Moral:
    Don't fuck with the Bird man with Robotic arms.
    DM got slapped by the girls and his twin.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)08:49 No.13517270
    Slap him still!
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)08:56 No.13517323
    Anyone else?
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)09:04 No.13517363
    Really? Really? Your DM sucks
    >> OP 01/14/11(Fri)09:05 No.13517372
    DH game, we are searching an heretech base. I, playing psyker, and our tech-priest stay in an office flicking trough some pappers while our scumbag looks in the next room.
    Suddenly scream.
    We rush after Scumbag and find him fainted on the floor in front of a gigantic mountain of animated meat with buzzaws for hands. I used my only offensive power at the time, Spasm to give us some time to drag Scumbag to safety while we burned the thing.
    Rolls a nine...
    Psychic phenomena: Reversed gravity.
    The frankensteinoid falls uppwards with the rest of us, it crashes trough the roof and keeps going while we get a precious second to get our wits about us. Then gravity returns, we take a nasty fall but survive. Fatso comes crashing down and splatters all over the place.
    Not really like Ops tale, but I think it was funny.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)09:06 No.13517377
    >uncontrollable
    >Will save

    Somehow, this is what I take most issue with.
    >> Ian !!mY2HGSLIkgP 01/14/11(Fri)09:09 No.13517388
    >>13517377
    Yeah It did not make sense to me but I did not have anything to complain about since my changes where cosmetic and I did not want to get anything worse.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)09:10 No.13517398
    >>13517372
    Nice!
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)09:15 No.13517434
         File1295014517.png-(16 KB, 500x562, 1282106608323.png)
    16 KB
    >>13517103
    >Kobold/Kender Hybrid
    WHAT THE FRAK?
    Could there be a worse combo?
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)09:16 No.13517440
    >>13517372
    Oops, forgot to remove my username since a previous thread, I'm not OP, sorry
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)09:18 No.13517448
    >>13517440
    Hmm... did not notice...
    Anyway. Was there anything else that happened?
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)09:18 No.13517451
    >>13517388
    You got randomly turned into a fucking bird-headed furfag with robot arms. For no reason. Save being bribed, likely sexually, hell, with mere PROMISES of sexual payment, even, and his own unforgivable derp.

    WHAT COULD BE WORSE?

    >kobold/kender hybrid, drow likely-sue who fucks corpses, some shit with a mindflayer

    oh, that'd probably be worse, on account of the fact it's a hybrid, and on top of that, a fucking kender hybrid
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)09:21 No.13517469
    rolled 45 = 45

    >>13517434

    A full Kender is worse than any half kender.
    >> Ian !!mY2HGSLIkgP 01/14/11(Fri)09:21 No.13517470
    >>13517451
    As I said. I did not complain since I got off easy in my mind.
    I Did get sweet revenge by leaving them to get fucked to death as I said before.
    They got mad at the DM for letting it happen and not at me.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)09:22 No.13517479
    >>13517434
    Drow/Kender
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)09:22 No.13517480
    >>13517448
    Yeah, Psychic phenomena tends save us a lot.
    This one time we where outnumbred by a bunch of barbarian warriors, I roll spasm again, resulting in psychic phenomena.
    All mypals gets a corruption point and flies into a Frenzy. Charging the everliving fuck out of the barbarians. That single round of intense RAGE earned us the upper hand and we took back the fight.
    >> Ian !!mY2HGSLIkgP 01/14/11(Fri)09:23 No.13517492
         File1295015009.jpg-(33 KB, 500x500, 1265605450520.jpg)
    33 KB
    >>13517469
    It was bad... She drew it...
    Don't have it.
    Never let me see the image again.
    But a female mindflayer is creepy....
    Image is the one she used.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)09:25 No.13517504
    >>13517469
    Hybrids are generally horrible. Kender are generally horrible. You've got two degrees of shit that is generally horrible. A hybridized Kender is worse.

    Hell, has anyone EVER roleplayed a Kender WELL? Anything beyond some stupid shit involving them fancying themselves a 'master thief' or believing that they should be treated well by everyone forever because SO KAWAII DESU... But instead as, I don't know, a Tiny Tim asper fuck who paws over the group's gear obsessively without TAKING any of it like a douche, derps here and there, and recognizes that, hey, just because he's some contradictory hobbit asper doesn't mean that he's free of any and all repercussions for being a hobbit asper fuck and getting his mits on people's shit?

    The only shit with Kender I hear about, is the archetype made famous by Wasteland Warrior's tales of Kjelmirr Bloodskull. Is there no hope?
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)09:26 No.13517505
    >>13517492
    a female illithid in itself isn't that creepy IMO. But a sexualised one is lovecraftian in it's disturbiness.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)09:26 No.13517509
    I hope it all ended with PidgeonPC killing his "allies" with cleansing flames.

    PidgeonPC sounded pretty boss though.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)09:26 No.13517510
    >>13517470

    Did you say he had robot arms in the draw thread? I might have to draw this guy again since robot arms pigeon man is awesome.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)09:27 No.13517514
    My DM once ran a game so shitty it convinced me that not every single person who runs D&D is as good at DMing as I am. I have thusly refused to play in any game since.

    Now when I run games I don't think 'man I wish I could play why don't these guys DM' but 'I need to DM for these peasants so that they can know what true gaming is.'
    >> Ian !!mY2HGSLIkgP 01/14/11(Fri)09:28 No.13517518
    She played it like a Furry Edward Elric...
    Yeah...
    Always Complaining about height. Her human form did that too..
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)09:28 No.13517520
    >>13517514

    Tell us a story of your DMing prowess, my Lord!
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)09:29 No.13517528
         File1295015367.jpg-(271 KB, 791x815, inkoman.jpg)
    271 KB
    >>13517103

    That image reminds me of something...
    >> Ian !!mY2HGSLIkgP 01/14/11(Fri)09:30 No.13517538
    >>13517510
    No The original request was a offhand bump simply saying "a pigeon faced man"
    >> Ian !!mY2HGSLIkgP 01/14/11(Fri)09:32 No.13517555
    >>13517528
    Kinda... But just the head was bird.
    More like Egyptian god figures... That is how it was described physically...
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)09:37 No.13517583
    >>13517528
    A source?
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)09:39 No.13517596
         File1295015971.png-(85 KB, 483x560, pidgeman2.png)
    85 KB
    >>13517103
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)09:45 No.13517626
    >>13517596
    haha.
    >>13517480
    Seems like I am not the only one with that kind of luck...
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)09:46 No.13517632
    >Game of D&D
    >Players chatting it up before the game starts
    >Dice being rolled in boredom
    >Talking about characters
    >DM watches
    >DM glances at his computer, begins dramatic reading of the Foreword of the Imperial Infantryman's Uplifting Primer
    >Players suddenly paying rapt attention
    >DM finishes
    >"So, are we ready to play D&D?"
    >Players clamor to know what the fuck that was
    >DM buys himself a week of prep-time, promising to run a game of Dark Heresy
    >Players are psyched beyond reason
    >My face when I'm the DM
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)09:46 No.13517639
         File1295016416.jpg-(102 KB, 600x500, JUST_AS_PLANNED.jpg)
    102 KB
    >>13517632

    >My face when I forget to put my face on
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)09:47 No.13517644
    >>13517632
    You sir are a Genius!
    >> Wolesz 01/14/11(Fri)09:50 No.13517662
    >>13517632
    You magnificent bastard.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)09:52 No.13517673
         File1295016749.jpg-(41 KB, 640x493, chickenboo.jpg)
    41 KB
    >>13517528
    reminds me of somthing too.
    >> Ian !!mY2HGSLIkgP 01/14/11(Fri)09:56 No.13517706
    >>13517673
    =_=
    Really Have He just been down grade to that?
    Compare Moe to who he had to travel with.
    Seriously.
    A Drow who lusts for the dead.
    A Female Mindflayer with unknown problems.
    A Female Kender/Kobold with ego issues about her height.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)10:03 No.13517750
    >>13517510
    DO IT!
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)10:05 No.13517761
         File1295017512.jpg-(50 KB, 350x356, holyland_c099_019.jpg)
    50 KB
    >>13517632
    GLORIOUS!
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)10:06 No.13517769
    >>13517626
    Care to tell what kind of luck have come your way during your adventures then comrade?
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)10:07 No.13517777
    >>13517372

    Did you shout "The waaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAARP claims your SOOOOOUUUUL!" ?
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)10:09 No.13517792
    >>13517504
    Actually, I had a bro who I teamed up with who made a pretty fun kender to play with. I was playing a gnomish artificer who specialised in making grenades and other explosive devices.

    Some point after the party formed up (in a tavern, natch), I found that several of my half-finished grenades had been replaced by various pieces of jewellery, shiny rocks and a pretty expensive diamond.

    I was thinking to myself "Oh, the kender is doing... what?!" but before I complained apparently he botched a roll or something and blew off two of his own fingers.

    As it turns out, the way he was playing his kender was that since he could only carry so many trinkets along, he was replacing the stuff he stole with other stuff he stole.. it was pretty much a lottery to see what would be taken.

    After having a chat with him in character I persuaded him to be a bit careful with the grenades I used, and gave him a whole bunch of them, which I regularly restocked. He was playing him as a naive innocent kender, and I pretty much turned him into the Trouser Exploder guy from Fallout 3. Steal money, provide grenades.

    It was fun all round.

    Except for the time we blew up the paladin's horse.


    ..No, wait, that was fun too.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)10:10 No.13517802
    >>13517777
    no, but Scumbag and Techpriest players have developed a habit of looking at each other, Trollface on, chanting "Perils of the WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARP!" and smiling like a pair of douchebags whenever I roll 9's.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)10:12 No.13517814
         File1295017937.jpg-(245 KB, 900x1165, cloud_OHGOD.jpg)
    245 KB
    >>13517644
    >>13517662

    Admittedly, it didn't go as smoothly as it could have. I tried to introduce the setting as smoothly as I could, more or less throwing them into things half-blind and giving them information as it came up. Trying to explain the Adeptus Astartes was fun.

    >"They're veterans of hundreds of military operations. Functionally immortal, incredibly strong, ridiculously big, they've undergone ancient and highly lethal processes that take them above and beyond their already impressive abilities."
    >"So they're like SOLDIER and we're more like ShinRa infantrymen?"
    >"... I... sort of."

    Breaking them of the D&D habit of winning through attrition was great, though. The player that had actually been through the military ended up teaching them (and me) the virtues of cover and tactical combat.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)10:15 No.13517831
    >>13517769
    Nothing specific Just that A psyker did the near impossible.
    Basically My guardsman who was sent to bring DMPC Psyker/Tech-priest creation to some ship on the other side of a city.
    City is full of killers.... Yeah.
    Anywho... the team also had a Psyker and an arbitrator.
    One room was full of mooks. Pyskers tag team a massive reverse gravity and have me walk out and drop a grenade barrage on them.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)10:17 No.13517847
    >>13517831
    say what? Is there a power for it or did they somehow engineer a psychich phenomena? Anyways, that sound like a job well done.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)10:20 No.13517863
    >>13517814

    Soon he's running a Blood Angels army with Mephiston in a trenchcoat wielding a force nodachi.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)10:23 No.13517880
    >>13517847
    It was A DM Special but basically It was a controlled version of Psychic phenomena: Reversed gravity...
    It was explained in a logical manner as a skill challenge. DM had a thing for those...
    But anyway it was long the lines of: Since this DMPC is a god class Psyker of sorts he has moments of complete control of reality at times. Only if he has a will target of the effects and a second psyker handy.
    It ended well for us. not for the mooks who each got a grenade somehow down the gullet.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)10:24 No.13517889
         File1295018687.jpg-(64 KB, 793x635, finalfastfood.jpg)
    64 KB
    >>13517863

    In his defense, the guy who made the Final Fantasy VII connection would only do that if he thought it would be really funny.

    And even then, it would probably be more like this if he managed to find another player with a sense of humor.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)10:24 No.13517890
    >>13517792

    A Kender in the hands of a good roleplayer is pretty much always my favorite character. Balancing enough good natured idiocy to actually be a kender, with kleptomania controlled enough to keep from pissing people off all the time, and a bit of working to be a bumbling credit to the team, is very hard to manage all at once. It's been so fucked up so chronically, so many times, that just the word 'kender' is a red flag for a lot of people for GET THE FUCK OUT. But if you make it, it is glorious.
    >> Ian !!mY2HGSLIkgP 01/14/11(Fri)10:26 No.13517899
    >>13517890
    So it would seem.
    But yeah. She was a horrible roleplayer...
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)10:36 No.13517976
    >>13517880
    Continuing on...
    After that we Moved on. We ended up spending the rest of the session basically running from illogical monsters. A Chaos Powered warboss...
    Yeah noclue on how he got there. We just ran for it.
    So yeah we finally got to the halfway point. and Took turns wait up. My luck in there was to find more grenades...
    Grenades are godsend to us in this game...
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)10:38 No.13517988
    >>13517890

    Kender have the same problem as paladins, really. Half the time people play them it's so that they can be an asshole to every one else.

    If you are playing a kender, and you steal something from another party member you are... not necessarily a douchebag.

    If that party member asks about it, and you go, "What? What item? Shut up, it's mine." then you are a douchebag. Remember, kender have no sense of ownership.

    If the party knows they can go, "Oh dang my *item* is missing" and you'll go, "Oh, you dropped it and I forgot to give it back to you, here you go." And you make sure not to do that too often, and especially not with anything that would be missed in combat, or make people die... then you are probably not a douchebag.

    If you immediately home in on stealing anything that is worth the most, or will benefit your character the most, and ignore everything else, then you are a douchebag.

    If your pack ends up full of bits of string, twigs, bent forks, and cracked eggs, then you are probably not a douchebag.

    75 percent of playing a character that people don't hate is not being a douchebage.

    The More You Know
    >> lucky the psyker 01/14/11(Fri)10:40 No.13518009
    >>13517976
    arent they allways?
    I asked my GM if I could have a pair of grenade pockets that could easily be torn from my belt, able to hold like 3 grenades each. I could.
    Now I pull off one pocket, pull a pin, casts fling on the pocket and enjoys seing the enemies of the emperor transormed into craters.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)10:47 No.13518056
    >>13518009
    This DM was fond of telling all the gory details of the death.
    Yeah. We did end up getting the Chaos powered Warboss downed. He was done in with a grenade barrage which where each shot down once they hit the boss's face.
    Time was slowed down by the DMPC and team psyker. Yeah Illogical and heretical. But a bit of Heresy was worth it...
    >> Ian !!mY2HGSLIkgP 01/14/11(Fri)10:48 No.13518063
    >>13517988
    Hmm...
    Nice...
    Never thought of it that way.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)10:52 No.13518084
         File1295020342.jpg-(156 KB, 800x794, Pidgeman2.jpg)
    156 KB
    Now with robot arms.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)10:52 No.13518087
         File1295020370.jpg-(139 KB, 800x600, 1292975715678.jpg)
    139 KB
    >>13517520

    I can sense you're being facetious but sure. Here's some tips.

    Don't punish the players for arbitrary reasons just because you're inadequate in real life.

    Don't fudge every die roll in your monster's favor because that's mega fucking lame. Do fudge some die rolls in your player's favor if they're having a hard time. Don't let them have it easy or handwave hard things-- if the players are all cripples, they should expect to have a hard fucking time if they need to climb a cliff. Doing this teaches your PCs that you're not there to masturbate them, but to challenge them, and helps facilitate an environment where the answer to a hard problem is "I don't know what to do; show me what to do/tell me what to do" but "What can we do to solve this, guys?"

    Don't use a GM's screen; roll in the open, get the players into the melodrama of dice rolling when unlikely events occur.

    Customize pre-written adventures to be interesting to the PCs; if an adventure has an alchemy lab and no one likes alchemy, but the wizard loves old books, put a library in there and then work out any plot-related details after.

    Again for pre-written adventures: the book is a suggestion and guideline, not an iron rule. Make intelligent decisions about the content therein and how to use it. If the book's focal point is a legendary powerful weapon that bonds to an individual, taking the shape of their favored weapon, growing in strength as they level, don't give it to the low-strength wizard instead of the exotic weapon fighter.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)10:53 No.13518093
    >>13518084

    This image is incredibly entertaining to just wordlessly link friends to.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)10:55 No.13518104
         File1295020520.jpg-(166 KB, 800x794, Pidgeman2v2.jpg)
    166 KB
    Whoops, forgot a couple of things.

    >dendell character
    >> Ian !!mY2HGSLIkgP 01/14/11(Fri)10:56 No.13518109
    >>13518084
    Bravo! I am... Stunned! Awesome work!
    >> Ian !!mY2HGSLIkgP 01/14/11(Fri)10:57 No.13518118
    >>13518104
    I am Double stunned~!
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)10:59 No.13518126
         File1295020741.png-(307 KB, 704x645, 1278000755162.png)
    307 KB
    >>13517372
    Metallus is that you?
    Scumbag reporting in.

    Captcha: tering any
    Yeah, sounds like the scum alright.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)10:59 No.13518129
    >>13518087

    1. Look up monsters you're going to use in games before hand and try to figure out good tactics. Build encounters that have good synergy, either tactically or visually. A stone golem with two barbed devils is boring, until the stone golem is carved in the image of a terrible devil lord, or the barbed devils are supporting the golem from a series of opera boxes above the killing floor.
    1a. Use appropriate miniatures if possible. Don't take out a troglodyte or a snake person and declare them the bandit; likewise, don't take out bandits and don't declare that they're guards. Minis are abundant among all gamers, even if your entire party is a tau line up. Use coins if you have to, but you need to keep shit straight as hell if you do this.

    2. Make the terrain interesting and a viable part of the game; difficult terrain, hot weather dangers, slopes, staircases, ruins, multi-level maps, etc. Draw the maps well; spend some time on them. Help the players visualize where they are by using the image on the map as a tool. Ten minutes into combat after you describe the desert arena, they'll forget every important detail about the arena and have to ask-- but if it's on a map, then it's easily referenced and extrapolated on with other group members, or even used accidentally.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)10:59 No.13518131
    >>13518087

    BEHOLD!

    Dude, every fucking DM worth his salt knows that.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)11:01 No.13518140
    >>13518131
    Archive worthy~!
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)11:03 No.13518147
         File1295020989.jpg-(16 KB, 310x310, 1293279669217.jpg)
    16 KB
    >>13518129

    3. Then, think of how it will all go down; evoke imagery, try to get emotions going, and try to convey the meaning of the scene all in a couple paragraphs of spoken description from yourself. Use your voice to evoke; speak quickly when urgent, slowly when suspenseful, louder when presenting excitement or danger and softer when presenting calm or quiet. Also, present the mood of the scene to the PCs; don't expect them to read your mind. "You come over the ridge and see a drider. Roll initiative." versus "You crest the ridge into the cavern and see that the room is dominated by a massive pool full of phosphorescent fungus that glow and fill the cave with an eerie light. At the far end of the cavern is a drider. He is not armed, nor does he look dangerous, and he seems to be resting in a massive web that dominates the side of the room." The former says a fight and the latter gives you multiple opportunities-- you could ambush, negotiate, use diplomacy, sneak by, whatever.

    Nothing is more boring than a DM that sets down monsters on a blank chessex map, says "Bebilith" and then just runs you through the rotes of combat. "Oh. Make a save. You're fine." ... "You take 17 damage." .... "You're knocked prone." "By what?" "Oh, the monster." "Which... which one?" "If you don't know, then, whatever."

    >>13518131

    If you haven't gamed with a lot of different groups, you'd be surprised how often these suggestions don't occur to the DM. Every tip I am offering here is something that I have encountered. Sometimes my GM would come to me and whine about how we killed an NPC he liked and how they were awesome when they introduced them with "A guy is coming up the road... uh, he's a.. orc... um, give me your cell phone, that's a wagon. Okay, initiative" and never tried to speak or describe him at all.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)11:04 No.13518156
    >>13518147

    Aight bro. Keep it up, anyway. Maybe we can screencap em and post em angrily at people whenever they start a DM, WAT DO thread.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)11:04 No.13518159
    >>13518087
    How do you fudge rolls if you roll in the open?!

    >>13518104
    I came here, today, looking for an inspiration for a character. Now I go, with Birdman, the pigeon-headed, robo-armed hero in gothic plate armor, fighting with three katana and an AK-47 at the SAME TIME.
    >> lucky the psyker 01/14/11(Fri)11:05 No.13518162
    >>13518126
    You be damn right you studdly piece of heresy! Can't wait for the next game!
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)11:08 No.13518190
    >>13518104
    You know, that picture reminds me of the art for Chickadee quest.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)11:10 No.13518208
    >>13518104
    hey fellow ar/tg/uy, this drawing looks killer as fuck and you got me wondering
    what drawing program did you use to make it?
    those brush strokes look like you drew it with a sharpie
    getting the feeling it was painttool SAI
    >> Ian !!mY2HGSLIkgP 01/14/11(Fri)11:11 No.13518213
    >>13518159
    .... Bit much?
    I would say he would just use his hands.
    I made him a grapple/punching type of fighter.
    But he did have a club... it was described to me as a Kenabo(sp?) a Japanese club that appears in many images of demons.
    Basically a wood or metal bar with metal studs covering it.
    Swung it like a bat.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)11:12 No.13518227
    >>13518159

    It has to be done early and you have to be good at what you do and very smooth about it. I don't do it ever unless I genuinely feel like it's well-deserved; ie, after a session of dying twice and missing all attacks, sometimes the PC deserves to, at least, hit one attack once.

    How to:
    >DM rolls. Gets a 9.
    "9... okay, that hits. 26. Your AC exactly."

    Now the PCs know you get a 26 on 9 if they were paying close attention. So you have a +17 to hit.

    But... you can easily change that by giving him a +16 to hit. Or by "power attacking" and dropping it to +15. Oh, now he misses by 2. Damn power attack. I won't use it next turn; I'll show you.

    Then you keep it straight for the rest of that encounter. Change your notes or scribble some down.

    In reverse, archer PC who has not hit anything all day rolls up on a high-AC monster with deflect arrows. Rolls a nat 20, first roll above 6. He lets you know he got a 32 with that roll-- and the monster's AC is only 31, meaning he may not ever hit it again... Erase deflect arrows. Add skill focus (perform (dance)) or something.

    Be kind when the PCs need it and be challenging when the PCs need it.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)11:16 No.13518258
    >MFW thread off topic but it matters not. Made better by it.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)11:17 No.13518261
    >>13518213

    You play your original version of birdman, I play mine from the Aliens-Are-Humaboos thread with a Kalaschnikov.
    >> Ian !!mY2HGSLIkgP 01/14/11(Fri)11:19 No.13518273
    >>13518261
    Okay. Just don't go blowing off your head now, I don't want to know how that would look.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)11:23 No.13518302
         File1295022210.jpg-(124 KB, 800x691, Untitled-2.jpg)
    124 KB
    >>13518208

    Photoshop actaully. Used the angled brush. I usually use Sai but have been trying to use Photoshop more recently just to get used to it.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)11:26 No.13518325
    >>13518273

    Blowing...off...That's...No, that would go too far.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)11:27 No.13518331
    My monsters ALWAYS have skill focus (perform (dance)).
    >> Ian !!mY2HGSLIkgP 01/14/11(Fri)11:28 No.13518336
    >>13518325
    Yeah it would be....
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)11:31 No.13518354
    >>13518302
    I hate to ask....
    Would you be willing to draw....
    The Kender/Kobold hybrid trying to fight The bird man and failing?
    >> Ian !!mY2HGSLIkgP 01/14/11(Fri)11:38 No.13518401
    >>13518354
    Well... We didn't end up fighting.... Just they had set up as the BBEG since I was the only not arrested...
    Yeah long story of how they got to where they met their inevitable end with the incubus....
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)11:48 No.13518469
    Bump for more crazy stories
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)12:09 No.13518611
         File1295024968.jpg-(52 KB, 600x456, 0NECKBEAR.jpg)
    52 KB
    >>13518469
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)12:24 No.13518704
    AD&D setting, our party ran across a group of traveling wagon folk, lead by a charming older gent. They invite us in, and thinking that some misfortune was sure to befall these innocent traveling folk in the future we sign on to protect them, and there's much feasting and celebration. As turns out the whole time the feast was an elaborate illusion put forth by the wagon folk (evil cultists) and we had all been charmed from the get go. The only one to be unaffected was the 1/2 ogre who was only smart enough to articulate "Him stupid, we go." We basically ended up helping them to slaughter anyone who could oppose them in the area. Part of the paladins penance was listening to the Ogre with a more patient ear.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)12:27 No.13518715
    >>13517103
    >>Lithe is cursed with uncontrollable necrophilia. Now has to roll a Will save when near a corpse.

    See, now that means you stand up from the table and walk away.
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)12:30 No.13518738
    I haven't played enough to get many good stories, but i guess this kinda counts:

    >we tell the dm what we're going to be when starting a new campaign
    >We get there, and there's no ranged
    >I last minute change to a psion(4e)
    >pull goblins off 25-foot cliffs, and they die
    >> Anonymous 01/14/11(Fri)12:37 No.13518775
    Horrible things my DM has done? He put a river with a drowning NPC in it. We all rolled natural 1s on our swim checks and it's now customary for the BBEG of every campaign to have a River of Drowning surrounding his lair.
    >> Ian !!mY2HGSLIkgP 01/14/11(Fri)12:48 No.13518826
    >>13518715
    The player (The Dm's twin) was into that...
    It was a running gag from another campaign taken to an extreme.



    [Return]
    Delete Post [File Only]
    Password
    Style [Yotsuba | Yotsuba B | Futaba | Burichan]