>>14995723
it's obvious why you have no friends... you appear to be some sort of puma.

There's quest threads, which sort of a group RPG session; some are long-running. It might be easier to organize an online game if you indicate what systems/edition/etc. you are looking for, as well as your timezone.

For example, I'm in the US, Central time, looking for players for an new World of Darkness campaign. Set in either modern-day America or circa 1920's South America, it will be based around the Mortals/Hunters-type of game.

... and there you go.

Well, there are the quest threads, wherein all the denizens of /tg/ come together in a collective roleplaying type thing.

>>14995746

What are you talking about, I would love to be friends with a puma. Especially a puma that can type and loves RPGs.

>>14995826
but what if it's a trap. what if the puma wants to befriend people on this board, meet up one on one in real life, and then eat them when they show up

>>14995846

I suppose that's possible. Pumas are one of the most intelligent and tricky big cats. Maybe some sort of test of trustworthiness?

>>14995865
We should ask the OP to post proof he /doesn't/ eat people.

>>14995846

Isn't there an NBC Dateline special about that? To catch a predator, or something?

>>14995884
Sexual predators, but I can understand the confusion.

>>14995884

Wrong kind of predator, Mr. Hansen.

>This thread

Stay classy /tg/

>>14995865
If they're so clever, why would the OP put up a real picture of himself? Or is this like reverse psychology, to make us think he couldn't possibly be a maneating cat?

Oh come on, you're doing it on purpose.

>>14995928
Perhaps he is hunting for pelts, and is trying to trick us into showing up, thinking that some (or perhaps, all) of us are pumas.

The classic reverse double troll for puma hides; a 4chan nostalgic moment.

>>14995928
if you show up to a meeting in real life without knowing you're supposed to meet a puma, when you see the puma you'd run before you got close. if you know you're supposed to be meeting a puma, you'll go right up to it, close enough for it to attack.

oh god this thread

>>14995971

But I thought you had to be of evil alignment to play a Puma, thus making him dangerous by default.

>>14995964
Or he's Jamaican.

>>14995971
...what is both parties involved are pumas?

>>14995994

What if you're the puma and he's the human.

>>14995990

Man, the puma wants to play RPGs, not the other way around.

>>14995990
>edition wars
Do not go there, Pumanon.
I see through your clever camouflage.

But the filename says it's a dog so it's not a puma

>>14995994
Then they would probably conduct a courting ritual and if successful, mate afterwards.

If they are the same sex, the above would still occur or they would hold ritualized combat to see who claims the other's territory.

>>14996018

Or is that just another trick?

>>14995993
What if he's a fake Jamaican?

>>14996008
Stay with the tour group. The puma is trying to trick someone into showing up, so it can eat them. This is like Portal and the cake (which is a lie), except this time, it is a puma, and the truth.

guys what the fuck are you talking about?

>I have no friends irl but would love to learn how to play them.
>play my friends

OF COURSE he wants to eat you and play with you beforehand. All catlike creature do this

>>14996030
What if the Puma wants to bake you a cake.

ITT: OP discovers the peril of using an image more interesting than his request.

>>14996044
You can alway subdue the savage puma with catnip.

>>14996046
Are you not listening? The cake is always a lie, but the puma is always the truth.

Not really, people hate it when you play traditional games on /tg/, because staying in character and using images is avatarfagging and annoying to some people, especially random people who jump in with only half an idea of what's going on.

i.e.: It's been tried. Did not end well.

>>14996056
What if it's the reverse and he's a cake and the puma is a lie.

>>14996061
Are you saying that throughout the entirety of Portal, the cake.. was a puma?

>read this thread
>my gf is sitting on my lap
>I rub her thighs
>realize they are hairier than mine
>realize i have a bear sitting on my lap
>burst into treats

>>14996061
now thats plain heresy

>>14996061

Cake can't type.

But pumas are willing to go to any lengths. They are the natural enemy of the gamer.

>>14996061
Then the puma is a cake

>>14996075
If the puma (which is always not a lie) is the enemy of the gamer, then by extension, is the cake the ally of the gamer?

>>14996072
well becoming tasty won't help your situation, Mr Candy

>>14996068
Yes
>>14996075
In order for cake to be a lie it has to trick us, so cake is ALSO willing to go any lengths.

>>14996072
>burst into treats
>into treats
>treats

so the puma or bear type of treats

Actually, attacks from large cats are very rare.

>the cake is a lie lololol
Really /tg/? Is this how far you've fallen?

>/tg/ discovers that OP, while appearing to be a truthful puma, is in fact a lying cake
WE ARE ONTO YOUR TRICK GLADOS.

>>14996094
Thats the big cats want you to think.

Its a feline conspiracy I tells ya what.

>>14996072
>read this thread
>my gf is sitting on my lap
>I rub her thighs
>realize they are hairier than mine
>realize i have a puma sitting on my lap
>burst into cake

>>14996094

of course. It's called ambush not attack

>>14996072
For the love of god, DON'T! Bursting into tasty treats is the number one cause of deaths during a bear attack. I know it's a natural defense mechanism, but you have to surpress it! IT'S THE ONLY WAY TO STAY ALIVE.

>>14996094
Unless you're a gamer.

>>14996089

Are you suggesting that cake is sentient?

>>14995945
Yeah. The difference is that you personally perceive the guy falling over at the gym and there aren't so many thousands of them falling over that you feel like you can't make a dent. We deal a lot better with immediate, personal things than large abstract ones, and we are psychologically incapable of working up the same level of concern for each person who dies in Africa because it would quickly overwhelm us. That and there's a certain amount of tribalism in all of us that prevents us from caring as much about people who are different from us. Most Africans don't speak English, don't look like me, and live lives that are hard for me to identify with. I'm not saying that makes some sort of objective difference, but morality is subjective (and obviously so are we). We could and should be better people, but there are strong reasons why we are not. Just saying.

>>14996094
And cakes are very common.

>>14996103
>>14996105
Yeah

>>14996115

>>14996117
I'm suggesting that we are pumas and he is a cake

>>14996059

This. There's always some jackass who manages to get the thread deleted and everybody b& just for playing. Usually someone who doesn't even play.

This thread has gone from bad, to PUMA, to good to confusing. I'm not... what?

>>14996072

LOL. Check your posts before you hit submit faggot.

>>14996142
I am not a puma and I am also not a cake. I am actually eating cake.

>>14995964
>Perhaps he is hunting for pelts, and is trying to trick us into showing up, thinking that some (or perhaps, all) of us are pumas.
If the OP pulled that one off he'd be more puma than puma.

Wait... so are WE the puma cakes?

>>14996160
Woah, we're puma cakes now?

>>14996154
we need a timestamp to prove that you aren't a puma made out of cake

>>14996160

and Dyson trees

>>14996161
What do puma cakes taste like?

>>14996030

But what if the puma is sincere this time? What if /tg/ has a once in a lifetime chance to befriend a puma? To build an alliance between gamerkind and the kingdom of the pumas?

>>14996159
More Puma Than Puma, that's our motto.

/tg/ more Puma than Puma

>>14996167
Puma. Or maybe chocolate

Cake makes everything funny amirite guize?

fucking summer tg

>>14996168
This is 4chan. Be a little more savvy than that; to fall for this is to fall for one of the three classic blunders.
>Never trust a puma when cake is on the line.

>>14996168

this sounds to me very elfy. You are not an elf, are you?

>>14996168

THE LAST TIME WE TRIED THIS /R9K/ GOT EATEN

never change

this reminds me of myspace chat back when i was in 7th grade

>>14996199
Last year was painful, wasn't it?

>>14996168
we need to arrange a meeting with the puma representative with humans coming in large numbers so as to avoid ambush

>>14996150
>LOL. Check your posts before you hit submit faggot.
You mean: "before you hit submit, faggot." The way you typed it, you're warning him not to hit the "submit faggot" button (which, granted, he probably shouldn't do either). People in glass houses should be careful when they masturbate.

>>14996184

You can write this off as summer if you want but when you get eaten by a pump don't come crying to me.

>>14996206
But what if they have a trojan puma ready?

>>14996212

bitches don§t know 'bout my pump stack

>>14996206
The pumas will send more of their kind in advance and hide. Pumas attack from ambush, this is a known quality. As such, we should have the meeting on an airplane, as the pumas won't be able to sneak guns or knives aboard, due to increased security at the terminal.

We shall meet with the puma, but by the gods, it will be at a time and place of our choosing.

>>14996189
AND NOTHING OF VALUE WAS LOST

>>14996206

This is a doable idea. Either that, or we should dictate the meeting place, so there is no chance of a sneak attack by the pumas.

>>14996215
A trojan cake full of pumas

>>14996226
I'll buy the airline.

>>14996215
do heavy cavity searches of all pumas that attend the meeting, which is held in a heavily fortified room we can quickly evacuate and quarantine to contain them

for serious op, you should check out the SUPTG irc. there dark heresy rogue trader and pathfinder/3.5 are all run.

>>14996240
Then we'll use Leonardo DiCaprio to get inside the mind of the Puma and figure out where the attack is going to be!

>>14996245
What, and have them bite our balls off when we essentially fudge pack them?

>>14996168
I thought Pumas were a Meritocracy.

>>14996240
You do that very thing. I will bring five of my best pumas with me, to ensure that nothing untoward happens.

Also: ITT - ask a puma anything.

Anyway, OP, to go off on a non-puma tangent for a second, go here:

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/chats.html

>>14996256
There's a PUMA in this thread?

>>14995826
>>14995846
this is funny cuz another word for puma is cougar... which is.... well go look it up if ya dont know

>>14996273
Several, technically. You have further questions?

>>14996274
Moron, puma is not the same as cougar. It' the same mistake that made use lose Fred.

mfw i am the OP and this is the second post i made in this thread.

fuck you guys.

>>14996254
Pumas are actually in the middle of a heated civil war over the issue as we speak.

>>14996288
try wiki. for example this link
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cougar

>>14996292

You got answers here >>14996059

>>14996294
or are they really working together to stage a fake civil war to lul us into a false sense of security?

>>14996297
Poor Fred made the same mistake too. I'll salute your soon to be dead by puma cake body.

>>14996294
Depending on how you view it, its either a civil war or widespread civil disobedience and sporadic rioting. I am a moderate, electing to stay out of the political fray until the smoke dies down.

>>14996292
He knows we're on to him and now he's being skittish!

>>14996317
The Puma admitted to the civil war, which means there is no civil war! But he also downplayed it's severity, so maybe there IS a civil war and it's REALLY BAD!

>>14996332
Holy fuck it must be Boatmurdered there!

>>14996339
ELEPHANTS VS. PUMAS?

>>14996332
I am no cake, sir! Impugning my good name will do you no good at the negotiations table.

As reparations for these slurs and slanderous acts, I put forth that we receive, as due compensation, no less than four namefags and a DeathleapersFangirl to be named later.

>>14996317

You weak-willed coward! It is the sovereign duty of all patriotic pumas to participate in politics!

>>14996348
Aha! So you admit you Pumas just wanted to eat us all along!

>>14996346
YES. Just be glad the carp decided to remain out of this.

>>14996354
Oh, yes, the mighty roar of the soon-to-be-deposed tyrants. When you ran against the lions for the "king of the jungle", where were you? I was there, good sir, in the trenches. We had polling stations from the creek by the monkey habitat all the way to Rhino Valley, and what, exactly did you do during the Vietnam war?

I will tell you: you were in Canada. Yes, I said it.

You, 'puma', are nothing more than a cheap mountain lion's WHORE.

>>14996315
Would they submit themselves to the horrors and loses of war just to pull a simple trick? They are a tricksy species, not a foolish one.

>>14996389
What if GLADOS tricked them into a civil war?

>>14996358
We felt the exchange would be a good one; you would be rid of some of your problem people, we would have personnel on scene with non-taloned hands, which I must admit, are very .. handy, if you'll pardon the pun.

Opening cans of tuna, for example. Delicious stuff, that.

>>14996396
Impossible, the pumas are cakes, she would have no leverage.

>>14996389
it only takes the pumas in charge to know it's fake, the rest could be simply pawns in the games of the higher ups who are looking for a new food source

>>14996385

You dare impugn my honor, you low-born wretch? I demand satisfaction, sirrah!

Hey guys what's going on in this thr...aaawww shit.

Gentlemen, I come as a representative of lion community. Our leadership has decided that it is unacceptable for humans to establish relations with the puma community before us, as lions have sovereignty over all big cat affairs and must thus be the first to establish a diplomatic relationship.

I'm also here to inform that, as of now, there is no plan for any such diplomatic activities.

>>14996416
You seek satisfaction, sir? Might I recommend YOUR MOTHER.

I, for one, found her deeply satisfying.

Is this shit serious? Some of you cats just don't get it, do you?

what is this i dont even

>>14996432
so you rule all big cats do you? ha, you cowards fear to come to tiger territory

>>14996462
OP Original Puma

Fucking Cats...

>>14996432
And who appointed you the king of the jungle?

You did hold the majority vote, and you certainly may not impose your non existent policies all our kind!

Such self entitlement is borderline fascism!

And we tigers abhor such debauchery in the feline house of parliament.

>>14996212
oh my god I didn't even know pumps eat people
I have like three pumps in my garage!

>>14996475

Just be glad you HAVE a territory. You WILL abide by our decision.

>>14996432
You have no connection to the internet meme cats. You have no authority over us. Infact we've been participating with humans for a long time now. You go back to maybe starving to death on the savanna, I'll go back to being LOOOOOOOOONG and well fed.

>>14996475
>>14996489
Oh yeah tigers, act tough now, but I saw all the Tigers during the election shouting "Lion Pride" and touting your fake manes. Or did you just finally grow a pair of balls?

What's going on in here?

Do you have any idea how many of your ilk I've killed for lesser insults, sir?

>>14996332
There is no civil war and it's REALLY BAD

Saved for posterity.

>>14996505
yes, the decision that just happened to keep all tiger territory borders right where they already were, you did so much

Do we count as big cats nya~?

>>14996519
Every single one of those heads was donated to science, to help cure feline leukemia.

Way to go, "hero".

OP, to answer your question, YES, you can play an RPG on these boards.

Source:
This thread

>>14996519

And this is why we do not wish to establish relations with humans.

>>14996507

No, we have no authority over you nor would we care to. Our authority only covers big cats. You know, the ones that matter.

CATNIP AWAY!!!

>>14996519
Fear me, I've killed hundreds of elk.

>>14996528
GET OUT

>>14996510
Treason and liger sires, the entire lot!

And pray tell where were the panthers on election day, if not lazily laying about in the trees, to careless and apathetic about voting!

This is why we have lion fascists running the entire show, running our communities to the ground, with their tax cuts, pork barrel eating behaviours and incessant need to rely on body smell and scent!

Any true big cat predator have no scent of their own!

And you can yourself a patriotic feline citizen.

>>14996545
We, of the Puma, have long accepted the memecats as friends and fellow believers in the Ceilingcat.

You would do well to remember that the worst of fates are reserved for heretics.

>>14996556
>>14996527
>mfw tigers hunt the lowly human, a prey only hunted by the starved and dying among lion-kind

I'll be your friend OP

>>14996550
Free yourself of your human-branded name, fellow feline! Overthrow your oppressor and bite the hands that feed you!

Join us and we shall put you through the finest catnip rehab ever devised.

>>14996579
Lowly humans? Explain Teddy Roosevelt then.

>>14996551

Fear me. I've killed all of them.

>pork barrel eating behaviours

H-How dare you!? This will come up in our next meeting, sir!
Rest assured!

SIR WE NEED MORE CATIP THEY WONT SHUT UP!

>>14996583
God damnit snow leopard I told you not to keep coming around here when grown folks is talking

>>14996552
B-but why?

>>14996579
At least our society isn't built solely on the backs of females, you sexist tyrant!

Go hunting some time around, and maybe you can appreciate what we everyday big cats have to put up with.

>>14996579
a prey capable of using guns, something that can kill any cat. what better thrill is there than feeding off of one of the few creatures capable of killing you

>>14996588
Teddy Roosevelt was a natural born hunter. Close examination of his forepaws reveals what I, and others of my kind, have long since suspected: he was a puma.

>>14996615

Slander. Such a fine specimen could only be related to the majestic lionkind.

>>14996631
WHERE'S THE BIRTH CERTIFICATE?

>>14996631
>>14996644
The evidence is right here, right now.
Look into your hearts; you know this to be true.

ok cats shut up or its prision time for you

Did /tg/ just put forth the theory that Teddy Roosevelt is a puma?

>>14996669
whoa

>>14996606
Some of them are quite nice actually. I met Valdmir Putin once.
Granted he shot me, but it was a tranq dart, all in good fun.

>>14996669
The cat's out of the bag now boys!

>>14996724

What was that?

Hee.
You guys. Just sooooo serious all the time~.

>>14996528
Not yet sweety!

So now we're on cat politics?

This needs to be archived. Alas, I am too lazy to have learned how to do it.

>>14996876

suptg autoarchives, but you can vote it up. I think it's already on the other archive, but I'm not sure.

I fucking love you guys. Seriously. Best laugh all night.

>>14996876
Been archived on chanarchive for at least twenty minutes now.

>>14996954
I am not letting this be the last post.

NOW guys, the amount of off topic this is is ridiculous. We need to get back to the OP's original purpose. Which big cat are we going to meet with and get eaten by?

>>14997526
A puma. Or maybe a cake.

>>14997589
No, we're the Pumas... the OP is the cake waiting in ambush.

>>14997526
I dunno, man. Living in Norway, the only "big" cats we have here are lynxes. And they're not really the attack-and-eat-people kind of big cat.

Now, _bears_ we can do.

>>14997649
Don't do bears. That's obscene.

>>14997649
Lynx? THat's barely a big cat. Also, bears don't count, since clearly the OP is a puma waiting to devour us.

Fuck yes. /tg/ should either recruit people, and we can go play on mythweavers or dndonline, as shitty of a fucking site as they are. Because playing here would just get crammed with spam and stupid crap.

I've been wanting to tryout my warlock where I expand the invocation list to basically decree any 1st level spell=least, 2rd of 3rd=lesser, 4th or 5th=greater, 6th or 7th=dark.

That way I could cast cure light wounds every round. Wouldn't do much in combat, but then we'd never have to worry about lost HP during downtime.

Ray of Enfeeblement be another great one to take.


And I would hope you OP, aren't like other dumb shits at mythweavers and dndonline. Who act like psionics is scary, and homebrew is dangerously overpowered, but meanwhile tier one classes everywhere.

I, for one, am not a cake. I may however, be a lie.

You big cats bicker and pick at each other all your like. Us bobcats will continue to roll around just below your radar.

One day you wake up and all the bunnies are gone. What then?

We are bobcat
we are legion
we dont not forgive
we dont not forget

Also, what the fuck is that shifty big lipped elk doing here?
expect us.

Look at all these fatties, claiming to be cats. I can climb trees, and burrow in holes, and shit.

All very good, but how do you feel about pumaman? Maybe he could be an ambassador?

Sorry I'm late everyone, a Ferrari cut me off and, well, that just won't do at all. But I'm here now, so tell me, where there jaguars discussing things in this thread or not?

>>14998668
Yeah, what he said. Something about Jaguars?

>>14998633

There will be no alliance with pumans. Traitors, to both sides. Clearly a tool of the cakes.

>>14998136
Seriously Bobcat? Don't you even be coming around here acting like you've got a place at the table. Us big cats got better things to do than babysit your ass.