go on

Movies/Vidya as a game session time?
Movies/Vidya as a game session time.

>>15030699
"Man, that's weird. I mean, you're both bards. I figured you'd be fighting over this female NPC...

Why are you smiling?"

>It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right?

Correct since both of you are bards you'll be too busy trying to seduce everything to fight.

>>15030741
>implying we can't just share

>>Road to El Dorado campaign
>>MFW
Why the everloving fuck did this movie not get a -lot- more fame than it did?

>>15030750

As long as their balls don't touch it's legit.

"Hey guys, I know you wanted me to run CoC, but I thought we'd mix it up a little."

Buffs buffing buffs buffing buffs.

>>15030759
Because people are stupid.

>>15030759
most of the music was really awful, that probably didn't help

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the three of us play? Me and Jim already have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're both bards.

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right?

fuck yeah, i love these threads!

>>15030801
"You know you guys will eventually need more players, right?"

"Well, we'll just have to get the band back together."

> "no, its totally fine that you guys didn't want to play my CoC campaign. Even though i've been writing it for months... Anyway I've got that space opera game you all wanted set up."

>>15030759

This is now about turning the Road to El Dorado into an RPG.

I really need to get around to actually watching that movie one of these days. I keep forgetting that it exists.

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't Just the three of us play? Me and Jim already have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see...are you kidding? You're both bards.

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right?

>>15030874
http://www.megaupload.com/?d=FKAGW2D4

>>15030854
Warhammer Fantasy Roleplay. Both players start as entertainers, move on to rogue or demagogue or whatever.

>>15030883
Seems like it would involve a lot of exploration and social encounters. Oooh, how do we involve the ball game?

GM: Okay guys, pass in your sheets... Greg what the fuck is this? There is no way your strength can be this high.
Greg: Nah, see, I got max points from Enemy and Dependent, and then got a discount on strength for having a prosthetic arm.
GM: In a dark fantasy game. You do realize that's what we're playing right? Speaking of which, Paul, why in god's name did you make a naked fairy elf? Again?
Paul: dunnolol Figured it'd be funny.
GM: Ugh whatever. No one believes in elves though so you'll be mostly invisible. No one will react to your "funny" antics but Greg and the other players.
Greg: Tiny sized? I'll squish him.
Paul: Whatever pussy.
GM: Let's just keep this rolling. Sean, thank you for making a fairly normal fencer character. How about your character Fran?
Fran: She's a sadomasochistic ex-holy knight with hots for Sean's character. Oh, they're also half-siblings or something, but she doesn't know that.
GM: Goddamnit Fran...

>>15030886

Hot damn, you are awesome, anon.

>two bards?

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the three of us play? Me and Jim already have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're both bards.

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right?

"God DAMN it. I just wanted, just ONCE to run a good horror game without you fuckers FUCKING IT UP with your Mary-Sue bullshit. No, fuck you. Find another GM. I'm done."

>>15030915
>mfw my name is Greg
>mfw I've actually used Guts as a 3.5 character

>>15030915
Oh boy, I can't wait to see the DMs face when Sean shows his true colors.

>>15030886
Thank you

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the four of us play? Me and Jim and John already have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're all bards.

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right?

>>15030958
I think Sean is Serpico, not Griffith. Sadomasochistic sounds way more like Farnese than Caska.

>>15030958
I don't think "protective of Fran, attacks Greg" is really "true colors".

>>15030699
They weren't both bards...the black haired one was clearly more of a charisma based rogue.

>>15030928
>Tenacious D campaign

Iwillgiveyouallmydollars.jpg

>>15030937
Beat me to it. Second place:

>All right, we're all here, let me see your sheets... Are you kidding? All four of you are fighters!

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the social encounter, right?

Guys, you KNOW that the Champion class isn't balanced yet.

>>15031023
Damn, should be "...past the FIRST social encounter..."

Fuck proofreading and the librarian it rode in on.

Especially the librarian it rode in on.

Mm, librarians.

Have we discovered some untapped source of power?

A single bard is useless.

But put two together and they can move mountains, or at least scam the locals into doing it for them.

Maybe it's with one bard the enemy looks at them and goes 'my god nobody can be this stupid', kills them and then gets on with their job. With two bards it's 'my god nobody could be this stupid, wait there's another one, maybe you can be this stupid or maybe they're actually smart?'

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't Just the five us us play? We all have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're all bards.

>Yeah, we thought it would be brutal. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right?

>>15031060
The two-man con is the best con.

>>15031019

Oh hell yes, I'd love to see that too.

I can see the final showdown of the movie, the characters pull out this awesome song that they've written and have absolute faith that it's good enough to beat the Devil.

DM: "Roll for it."
Critfail

>>15030992
>>15030987
Oh.

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the four of us play? Me and Jim and John already have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're all bards.

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right?

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the two of us play? I already have a character sheet ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're a Warlord. You won't have any party members and most of your core abilities will be wasted.

>Yeah, I thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like I'll make it past the first combat, right?

>>15031060
And then you get four bards and they transcend time and space

So apparently, the Power Of Rock increases exponentially with the number of bards in a party.

And the Power Of Rock is one of the strongest forces in the universe.

"Dude, I'm too high to run a game right now."

"Aww, come on. We already have our characters!"

"Really? Let me see. What the hell? You two just statted yourselves."

"It will be cool! It's not like we can survive any combat or anything."

"Fine. You two are at home. You need some money to pay for that hole in the wall."

"I said I was sorry about that. I was drunk. Anyway, how the H are we going to pay for this S? I know! What if we find a magical keyboard?!"

"Awesome!"

>>15031117
>>15031075
So wait if five bard can destroy the world would ten bard destroy the universe

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the two of us play? I already have a character sheet ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're a bard.

>Yeah, I thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like I'll make it past the first combat, right?

>>15031137

Yes.

And then create a new one in its place.

>>15031137
If X amount of Y can destroy something of Z size, can 2X amount of Y destroy something of Z*inf size?

>>Everyone ready to play some Gurps superheroes? Let's see...Bruce, what did you make? The hell? No superpowers? In a 1,000 point game? What the hell, man? And all these skills? Where did you learn all of this?!

>>It's in the background

>>Yeah, I read it, mary sue bullshit, but superheroes, sure. And this wealth and 'prep time' advantage?

>>Yeah, should be fun.

>>Whatever...let's go. Not like you'll make it past the first combat, anyway.

>>15031169
The universe is finite, dude.

>>15031206
It's effectively infinite because it's expanding at the speed of light.

>>15031169

THE POWER OF ROCK LAUGHS AT YOUR "MATHEMATICS"

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the three of us play? Me and Buddy already have character sheets ready. We even brought Ritchie along too.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're all bards.

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right?

>>15031042
"So the Angel reaches down and swallows all of Rei's Eva above the knees. After a moment, it spits out the massive cyborg's helmet, which rolls across the ground, empty."

"What? That's totally railroading!"

"Actually, I'm fine with it. Rei can be replaced, anyway."

"Like hell she can! I jump down from the Eva's palm and run for the cage!"

"...Roll for Agility."

>>15031233
Sweet! We can afford to travel by air now! Everything is looking up!

>>15031214
Faster, actually. But it still has finite mass and finite boundaries because it curves back on itself.

No, I don't understand this shit either.

>>15031202
>>Shouldn't make it past the first combat
>>Laughing superheroes.jpg

>>15031217

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH

GM: You rolled a ranger. In a mech game.
P1: Sure, I can take out the enemy mechs if I hit their cockpit with my rifle.
GM: Okay. And you, your mech is shorter than you are?
P2: Yeah but if I can hit them I can take over an enemy's mech.
GM: Sure I guess I'll allow that, just make a will save every time you do. Okay and you ... WHY IS "MANLY AS FUCK" THE ONLY THING WRITTEN ON YOUR CHARACTER SHEET?

>>15031281
FUCK YEAR

>>15031258
The surface of the world is a curved 2 dimensional surface in a 3 dimensional universe. It has finite surface yet no boundaries. The universe may be a curved 3 dimensional volume in a 4 dimensional (or more) universe. Finite volume but no boundaries.

>>ersurom five
No I've never been there capture, is it nice?

>>So let me get this straight. -Somehow-, your character is a legend before the story even begins, as a mass-murdering bastard who carved through fucking armies.

>>Yeah...

>>You took Wanted, Infamy, Enemy, Destitute, Distinguishing Mark, and...PACIFISM?! This mass murdering bastard is a pacifist?!

>>He's reformed. He fights nonlethally now.

>>....Right. Okay. And to top it off, you have insane melee skill out the gate. Fantastic. And...a sword that does nonlethal because it's reverse-bladed. Okay. Your character might just be one of the most min-maxed I've ever seen, but with all these people wanting to kill you, I doubt this monstrosity will survive too long.

>>15031323
... Okay I'm curious now, what is this from?

>>15031356
Ruroni Kenshin
Or the Samurai X movie, the movie was a prequel though.

>>15031356
Look up the mangas Samurai X (Prequel), and Rouroni Kenshin. Just avoid the many awful dubs of the latter's animes.

>>15031323

"So let me get this straight.

We're fighting a guy who was lit on fire forever ago, and now will BURST INTO FLAMES if he fights for too long because he lacks sweat glands?"

"Ya, so?"

"Awesome...."

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the two of us play? I already have a character sheet ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're a fighter?

>Yeah, I thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like I'll make it past the first combat or social encounter, right?

>>15031356

It's...it's Rurouni Kenshin, man.

>>15031370

Or the entire last season after >>15031371 this guy shows up. Because a 95 episode series was killed by like 10 terrible TERRIBLE episodes

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the three of us play? Me and Jim already have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're both min-maxed monk/rogue/bards with unbeatable social skills and fighting styles. And one of you is the teen aged son of the other who is a woman?

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right? Just swarm us with sardukar and hostile fremen and it will be balanced.

>>15031376
Aw, anon, don't cry... it's only summer once a year...

GM: Okay, Vicky, your character is pretty balanced. But Al, what the fuck is with those stats?
Al: Hey, what's wrong?
GM: It is a level 35 Elder Vampire with every fucking power in the corebook.
Al: Just use power seals and it's balanced. Well, almost.
GM: *Sigh*
A while later...
Al: I drink the river of blood.
GM: LOL SCHRODINGER YOU DON'T EXIST ANYMORE

>>15031356
>>15031370

Actually, don't even watch the show. It's very long, so the budget's stretched thin and the animation wasn't that great when it aired; it won't have aged well at all.

Read the manga instead.

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the three of us play? Me and Jim already have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're both the NPC office worker class and you are the same person. What does that even mean?

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right?

>>15031371
In a DnD Game that's cool

In the anime since before that point they had seemed to value some level of realism with the standard allowances for a martial arts anime...

Even as a kid I found that Character to be stupid.

Awesome, but stupid.

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the three of us play? Me and Jim already have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're both bards.

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right?

DM: For the last time WE ARE PLAYING A HIGH SCHOOL ROMANCE RPG
S: Ya so?
DM: Then why do you keep shooting people and have every combat skill maxed, while having absolutely no social skills? And you have a mini-mech? Shaped like a teddy-bear?
S: Chicks dig the silent killer type... with robots?
K: ... *giggle* I kinda like the concept
DM: Oh for peats sake... fine we're rolling with it

Dude. This campaign was designed for, at least, a party of skilled characters. You can't handle this.

Man, I got this.

No, you don't, she's not even good at any good skills. All she can do is talk and steal shit. She's going to get killed before she makes it past the first major section.

I got this.

Fuck, I hate you, Steve.

>>15031425
Lawyers are modern day bards.
Hmm.
Makes sense.

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the three of us play? Me and Jim already have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're both professors.

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right?

>>15031425
>>Bards
>>Countersong duels using legal arguments while trying to make a Suggestion to the Judge
>>BEST D&D GAME EVER

"Okay guys, I've cooked up a home brew campaign setting, I'd like to give it a run tonight, if you don't like it we'll go back to something else next week..."

>>15031417
Or just watch the two Samurai X OVAs, they're better than the series anyway.

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the three of us play? Me and Jim already have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're both serial rapists. And why is 'anal circumference' a stat?

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right?

Best. Group. Ever.

>>15030915
>fairly normal fencer character

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the five of us play? We already have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're all fighters?

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right?

>>15031476
>>Fighters
You spelled Monks wrong, buddy.

Goddamnit, I love you, /tg/. Never change.

>>15031462
I would beat someone to death with a bat to play in a Wizards campaign.

>You're and elf?

Yes

>With an assault rifle?

Yes

>In a Magic setting?

Yes

>>15031476
You can't just use this gag for EVERY SINGLE PLOT.

Cut it out.

Fuck.

>>15031467
BUT ED IS A BOY

>implying I'm not going to rape you regardless

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the three of us play? Me and Jim already have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're both wizards.

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right?

DM: Okay Leonard... in 3.5... you built a Wizard... with nothing but telepathy and illusion spells?
Leonard: yup, figured it would be more fun than the standard fireball fair
DM: Well okay

30 minutes later

Leonard: WE HAVE TO GO DEEPER
Everyone else: Dammit again? STOP THAT SHIT NOW

>>15031551
>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're a wizard and a cop

Fixed that for you.

>>15031503
Dude, just play Dungeons: The Dragoning.

Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the five of us play? We already have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're all bards?

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right?

>>15031417
Not gonna lie, really looking forward to the remake. Not sure when it's gonna be out.

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the two of us play? I already have a character sheet ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're an artificer?

>Yeah, I thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like I'll make it past the first combat, right?

>>15031467

>Their next campaign

Best. Group. Forever.

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the two of us play? I already have a character sheet ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're a vampire in an campaign about slaying undead?

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like I'll make it past the first combat, right?

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the two of us play? I already have a character sheet ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're a scientist? With the Mute disadvantage? And no weapons? In an apocalypse game?

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like I'll make it past the first combat, right?

> "Well, Jim's moving away by the end of this month."
> "Yeah, but we want to play a sandbox game."
> "...I had a mecha campaign planned out."

Much later...

> Rocks fall, everyone dies.
> "And I point at the Earth, and say- 'Bang'."

Okay so we're all clear that we're playing a planes and mercs game in a custom setting right? Let me give your sheets a once over here

Nat... why does your background say you hate war? You're a pilot. And Blane why did you take the drawback "effectively mute". And Arty you're a rookie? Nothing wrong with your character though Charlie.

30 minutes later

YOU ARE DOG FIGHTING, STOP YAMMERING LIKE IDIOTS ABOUT THE HORRORS OF WAR GODDAM

>>15031691
Two months later...
>"Hey guys Jim moved back!"

>>15031702

And the campaign was never concluded ;_;

>>15031423
They did explain some of it as his hand being covered in gun powder and sword in somehow not rotted human fat. Place they were fighting in an oil refinery not exactly the hardest place to start a fire.

George you were high the entire time you were planning for this game weren't you?

... You're point?

>>15031691
>>15031702
>>15031706
What's this?

>>15031749
Cowboy Bebop

>>15031749

Oh >>15031706 was meant to reply to >>15031688

EP3 reference yo

>>15031749

Oh come on, really?

>>15031691

This one's Gundam 00, though. The first season ended with most of the cast possibly dead. The second was terrible.

I think this should be archived

"You want me to fight that? At level 1?"

"Absolutely (gleeful smile, entire campaign was set up to humiliate the min maxer and finally put an end to his bullshit)"

2 sessions later

ALKSJDF;LAJLFJAJFAS;LKDFJA

"Shouldn't have put weak points on every goddam monster man"

>GM:Ok let’s see your sheets"

>B:"My guy’s a daemon prince with a fist of stone and I giant revolver that fires custom monster slaying ammo"

>GM:"You do realise were playing Call of Cthulhu right Bill?"

>B:"Yeah but I don't want to die again like my All flesh must be eaten character"

>GM:"Make another one, what have you got Sarah?"

>S:"She's a pyrokinetic who recently checked into an asylum to protect others from her abilities and she used to date Bill's character and.."

>GM:"Did no one read the fucking rule book? Josh, please tell me you actually read the core book"

>J:"Yeah I did"

>GM:"Thank God"

>J:"But humans are boring so I made a deep one with physic powers instead, but he's an instinctual and I didn't take any combat skills so it should be ok"

>GM:"And how the hell are the other characters supposed to even be in the same room as you and Bill without going insane?"

>J:"You can go insane in this game?"

>GM:"You know what, fuck it, lets run the module anyway with the super characters. I'll convert it to GURPS or Exalted or something else next week"

>B:"So I can be a daemon prince then?"

>GM:"Yes you can be a daemon prince Bill"

>M:"This is bullshit I actually made my character right and now these guys are practically superheroes and all I get is an FBI rookie!"

>GM:"Bare with me for tonight Matt, pleas."

>M"I guess I can make a ghost or something for next week’s game"

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the three of us play? Me and Jim already have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're both summoners. Your character is only good at making weapons. And Rachelle your character only excels at making... jewels!?

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right?

>Guys this wasn't what I had in mind when I said we were playing Mage.

>>15031425
Somehow, I just know that if Pheonix Wright was ever adapted into a movie, it would star Matt Damon and Ben Affleck... I think I'm going to go cry now.

Alternatively

>Ok guys ready for a CoC game?

>Sure we are all gonna be teenagers from the same town, except Casey just moved here

>What? Are you sure?

>Sure, with our pre-made bonds we should be able to survive a while.

>oh how wrong they were...

Okay so lets take a look at those sheets

Casey, you're a scientist with few combat skills. Nice nice. Jack you're the party face, hot temper. Liking it so far

... Jason, why did you take profession Archeologist? You have no combat skills? How am I supposed to work with this? And T, man I love you, but alien symbiote host? Gross combat skills and the silent drawback? You better not have made just another gunbot like last time.

Well lets run with it.

5 sessions later

ADVENTURE!

> "Both of you made Paladins? But this is a Call of Cthulu campaign!"
> "Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right?"

>>15031864
>it wont let me post pictures

>>15031879
>>15031879

"Damnit, Steve, I *warned* you about this shit."

>So, looking at your character sheets, I noticed something troubling.
>Yeah?
>Sue, you rolled a Slasher?
>Yep.
>Right, well, since it's a combat heavy campaign, I guess I'll roll with it. Speaking of which, Mike, you did get the message that this is a combat-heavy campaign, right?
>Yep.
>But you rolled a pacifist human with no combat skills, and all your points dumped into investigation.
>Yep.
>Right, screw it, I don't have time to argue with you, we're rolling with it.

>>All-bard campaign

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the two of us play? I already have a character sheet ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're an unsanctioned psyker?

>Yeah, I thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like I'll make it past the first combat, right?

>>15030699

> "..."
> "Let's pretend that session never happened. We will never speak of it again. EVER."
> "That's the last time we let you GM when you're high, Steve. I'll never sleep again."

So I decided to try something interesting this time. You'll be playing in 2 separate rooms, against each other in an investigation cat and mouse style game. Sound like fun?

Plus there's a little twist, but you'll have to leave before I tell Craig that part, okay George?

>>15031931
And then they learned why you never, -ever- let anyone play an unsanctioned psyker in Dark Heresy

>So, everyone ready for the superhero campaign
>Yeah!
>Wait, Steve, you and Jim have the exact same build!
>We do not!
>Yes you do, look, same super power, exact same weakness, fuck you even bought the same items!
>No way, look, I have the "Washed-up" flaw and a family relationship, while Jim took the "No secret identity" flaw and the wealthy trait.
>Sigh fine, whatever, let's just do this.

>>15031961

I might actually run this setting, someday. How did Barnaby get his powers, anyway?

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the five of us play? We all already have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? Three psions and an artificer?

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right?

"Alright. Steve, John. You've both abducted Sarah's character and her family."

"I can't believe you guys drug out the game for 2 sessions just so you could do this."

"Hey Mike? I just wanna say that I really like this game. I mean, I gotta admit when I heard the name 'World of Darkness' I wasn't sure WHAT to think but I really like how gritty and dramatic this whole thing feels. All the terrible, real-world issues we're dealing with? It's pretty neat!"

"Yea whatever. SO! You come to stop at a bar in Mexico. As you all sit down for a drink and the big dance number finishes, a good number of the patrons grow fangs and begin slaughtering the other patrons."

"... WHAT!?"

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the two of us play? Me and Jim already have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? One of you is a fairy with no combat skills just lots of knowledge skills, and the other one of you is a human little girl and a idiot at that, with no combat skills but tons of skills in selling things. And you own a store? What the shit

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the four of us play? Me, Jim, and Dan already have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're all children. Plus, you've more than maxed out on flaws from the Freudian supplement book. Look at this: a pussy mama's boy, an abusive red-head, and some mute chick. What did I say about bringing fetishes into the game?

>Yeah, we know, but we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first combat or social encounter, right? Now let's suit up!

So wait, you all decided to play normal, regular people... In world of darkness? And Gary, You're playing a goddamn dog? I thought you decided to be detectives!

Yeah, we talked it over, we just want a fun encounter. Its not like we'll survive the first mission anyway, right?

>I was planning on using an actual picture but 1. I can't upload that and 2. this one is funnier

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the two of us play? I already have a character sheet ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're a rogue/fighter multiclass?

>Yeah, I thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like I'll make it past the first combat, right?

Greg: So, we'd like to try this game.

Phil(GM): What? I told you guys, the system's decent, but the fluff is horrible. I mean, fucking game-breaking sealed demons are one thing, but there's stats for a magical fucking boiler. And it's stronger than a mystic word! And you guys would make some stupid one-note joke characters, I know it.

Kate:No,no, you see, we made a team of government backed monster hunters. I've got a bike with some enchantments and gadgets!

Greg:My character dual-wields holy guns and is an expert sniper.

Tiff: And I'll play the OD, calling in backup and shit!

Phil: You know what? That sounds like it could be fun. I don't have an adventure, so I'll just roll up some encounters and we can go from there!

>>15031983
And then they hired Louie. Then won at D&D.

>>15032010

Then everyone died.

Then it was about schoolgirl lesbians, and a permanently beta guy who wasn't around half the time.

So Steve, me and the guys have been talking and we want to discuss something with you

We like the game you're running. The whole survive the gladiator arena, the management sections on the side, the bit of political intrigue, you're running a fine campaign.

Its just one thing. Do you really have to do those asides where the emperor is attempting to rape his sister? Its not really connecting anywhere and just kind of... no I'm going to come right out and say it, we don't want to hear about your incest fantasies in the game okay?

>>15032010
How did you leave out the fucking boombox suitcase blaring sutras and shit?

>>15032010

Yomi is ridiculously classy, though.

>>15031975
Same way as everyone else I guess?
It's not really explained any differently than the other NEXT

>>So, Steve, let me get this straight. You're all playing fighters.

>>Right.

>Unarmored fighters using shields with ungodly AC regardless.

>>Right.

>>And you want to take on the empire I explicitly said was the most powerful in the setting.

>>Right.

>And between you, you barely managed to scrape up three hundred soldiers.

>Yeah?

>>Nothing. Let's go.

>>15032057

It was really only used once. And not by the initial characters. That guy who died had a suitcase that launched missiles and loaded with guns.

I would play the fuck out of that, though.

>>15031615
Actually they were running 2 campaigns at once at first.

They wanted to keep one a bit more goofy.

"Wait, what? This is a medieval campaign... okay, let me get this straight, you're from the future... and you have a chainsaw for a hand because your own hand got possessed and you cut it off and replaced it. Did you even read the character creation section?"

>>15032103
>oops

>>15032091
Shit. Officialy best group ever.

>Hey guys, I don't have a lot of time today to play.

>Can't we just play a short session? We all have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You all took an insane amount of penalties.

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It won't take long to kill us... It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right?

>>15031091
1 bard is laughable
2 bards are a threat
3 bards are dangerous
4 bards will rule the world
5 bards will destroy it

Best BBEG ever. Seriously.

>>So you're all playing totally normal people?

>>Yep.

>>In an AFMBE campaign.

>>Yeah?

>>And none of you have secret stockpiles of food or weapons, or ultra-secure zombie proof hideouts?

>>No? Should we have?

>>Somebody pinch me, I must be dreaming.

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't Just the four of us play? We already have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see...are you kidding? You're all rogues.

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right?

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't Just the three of us play? Me and Jim already have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see...are you kidding? You're both chaotic neutral fighters... from heaven.

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first social encounter, right?

RRUURRUU

>>Nice work, guys, you're half an hour late and... what the fuck? Who the hell are all these people?

>>It's a school-holiday-care thing, man, we needed the cash. Can't we all just play? It can't be that hard to run a game for all of us.

>>They're fucking -kids-, Dave. You guys do enough damage as is, and... for fuck's sake, one of them is like nine. At least tell me you brought food for them.

>>Why? You always have food here. Besides, we already wrote up the character sheets and everything.

>>I... fine, give me them. The fuck? These are just the kids, down to the clothes. And you've maxed out Mental drawbacks on every single one. I told you we were playing a serious mech game, guys. You've been asking for one for weeks.

>>No, no, it's cool. We're both military officers, we'll just induct them or something.

>>That's not how it fucking... you've got one Mech stat sheet. And the stats... I don't have fuckign dice this big. And it's a half-kilometre high? What the fuck, guys. This isn't even minmaxing any more, it's maxmaxing.

>>Yeah, we pooled all of our mech points and spare XP for it. And why are you whining? This means you've got less combat to track. You should be thanking us.

>>FUCKING... you know what? Fine. It's all fine. I'll run it. You're going to see a fucking game, all right.

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't the four of us just play? We already have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see... Hm ok. Nate, you're a Commoner, with pretty shitty social skills, and I like the penalties for your relationship with your older brother. But... you used them to buy a companion robot? That emerges from your... head?

>But it's cool cuz my character is using him to replace his older brother! So there's depth!

>Let me see that Mike... you're a homeless teenage pyromaniac? Fuck, well so much for my Giant Evil Corporation plot. Harry, what'd you roll up?

>>15032223
Someone wanna let me in on the reference here?

>>15032223

Oh shit.

OH SHIT.

You evil, evil motherfucker.

I can totally see a disgruntled DM running something like this. My turn!

Same disgruntled GM...

> Witch Girl Adventures.

And no-one ate dinner that night. Because of the tears.

>>15032294
I think it's Bokurano. Could be wrong.

>>15032300
Except the DM
They love salty foods.

>>15032294

Bokurano. 15 kids find a giant mecha, and become the joint pilots, to fight off alien invaders.

The problem is, after each battle, the chosen pilot dies. And you're battling people from alternate earths; If you lose, your universe gets annhilated. Win, their universe is annhilated, so you're a mass-murderer either way.

Also, the pilot still fucking dies.

>>15030759
90s child here, loved the shit out of el dorado, watched it like daily for ages

el dorado was a terrible fucking movie and if you can see it after being eight years old and think otherwise, your rose-tinted glasses need to have their frames loosened

animation was terrible, songs were terrible, story was half-finished (granted, they were expecting a sequel, but still)

>>15032318
Well...

shit.

>>15032266
Chaotic selfish.

>"I... what?"
>"Normal humans with robot sidekicks that do all the fighting."
>"It sounds like you just took Pokemon and Battlebots and mashed them together.... actually that does sound kinda awesome."

>>15032318
Damn man, that's some A grade grimdark.

>>15032343
The pictured character there is referred to as Dung Beetle. He is a MASSIVE douchebag. You know that DM who does everything he can to break down every character and goes through every single pain he can to make the paladin fall?

Multiply that by about ten and that's Dung Beetle.

It makes more sense if you watch it. It's actually pretty good. Kinda depressing, though.

>>15032335
Downloaded it from the link here and am watching it. I agree, it is entertaining but not great. The animation is especially bad, the words don't line up with the mouths at all, it really throws me. Best thing about it is the dialogue, which is still only a little above average. If you compare it to ANY movie by say, pixar, you can see how short it comes up. It's no rockadoodle but it isn't an incredibles either.
The intro was pretty though

>>15032294

It's Bokurano. The sort of show that is so colossaly grim it's just difficult to accept the narrative at all. The parts that make it worth watching are the I HAVE TO WHAT moments, so if you want to watch it, don't read the rest.

Fifteen kids get conned into entering a sort of galactic tournament-style fight for the right of their universe to not be obliterated because some ascendant species somewhere thinks the multiverse needs trimming. You get a colossal half-kilometre-tall robot that is factuall indestructible to anything but other such robots that is powered by your own life. If you get selected as pilot, you're called to fight. If you fight and win you die. If you fight and lose, EVERYBODY dies. If you don't fight at all, everybody dies. If the other guys kills himself, you have to fight again until you die. If neither of you fight, you BOTH die. And every time you win, you cause another universe almost identical to your own to be destroyed. If you win the final fight, you live, but only if you agreed to go to another universe and recruit fifteen more people for the next round. And this weapon is in the hands of deeply fucked-up thirteen-year-olds so far out of their depth they can't even see the surface any more. And their only source of help is a psychpathic, sadistic robot with a penchant for causing torment to everyone in its power.

It's pretty much as 'GM's revenge' as it is possible for anything to be.

>>15032369

The anime whitewashes it. The last guy goes out like a hero.

In the manga, it's even worse. The last enemy pilot is insane, and flees his machine to hide amid the populace of his own world.

So to beat him, everyone has to die. The giant robot has to kill everyone on that world. Which isn't really murder, as they're all going to die the moment the fight is over.

Now, how about this one?

> "We're going to do something lighthearted for a change, okay? Let's try one of those indie games; You're all kids with pet monsters, and we'll go from there."
> "Okay, so we have a perky young girl, an older boy, and a teen grappling with his sexual identity."

Later...

> "Well, mother*fuck* that was horrible."

>>15032353
Read this as Chaotic Shellfish. Must use this for something.

>>15032403

You forgot. You live only if you replace Dung Beetle. He gets freed from his confinement, to teach the next group of kids. Then he dies, because piloting the robot kills you.

And it goes on.

>>15032409

You see the picture? That's the only manga I know that's darker than Bokurano. It's so hopelessly, mindlessly bleak that the anime actually ends abruptly before things can really bad. Madoka ain't got nothing on it.

>Well the Terry didn't show. Thats a shame, because he has all the source books.

>Me, Peter, Dazza, Cheryl, Barbie, Sheila already made our characters. We can just play a different system?

>All I have is dark Heresy...And you all rolled Bards! Are you kidding me?

>No, we're IN SPAAAACE!!

>>15032010
Too bad they had to re-roll new characters after their first encounter. The fucking DM became a dick after easily clearing up whatever he had planned.

>>15032374

The show is... mixed. The main narrative is varied from good to irksome. The supernarrative makes no sense on reflection, and its good moments come from the sheer FUCK YOU of the reveals, which are like being kicked in the emotional testicles. The actual fights aren't that flashy or interesting, although to some extent it's nice that a battle between billion-tonne robots is slow and slugging and destroys everything around it.

No, the thing that makes it truly worth watching is the character work. Each character gets at least one episode in which they're the focus, and you get to see just how an unstable teenager with a half-formed personality reacts to being put in the worst situation physically possible with scarcely the time to process it. What little joy in the show comes from the bittersweet way many character go out, which, despite still being grim as all flying fuck, is almost happy compared to the events leading up to it.

It's not violently grim, per se. Although the characters and people to tend to be bastards, it's not to the soul-grinding extreme of the Gungrave show. It is as dark as you can possibly get, though. I mean, shit, you would have to actively start from the Bokurano premise and work onwards to make a darker setting.

>>15032266
Wait, the Camera chick was a pyro?

>>15032514

It's implied in the episode with the burned down school. Definitely an unhealthy fascination with fire.

Gm: So, you gyus have been bitching about running a mecha game in Japan. I loathe the idea, so BAM, it get's colonized by a the British Empire. You read the details I snet you, right?

Everyone: Sure, sure.

GM: Okay, let's see some characters. Meg, what is this? An immortal mysterious woman ? And your only gear is a straight-jacket costume and 6 pizzas. Great. Tim, you had to use the psyhic powers splat-book, didn't you. And you are a prince of Britain. And how do you pronounce that name? Ehh.

Kate, okay, conflicted pilot, dual heritage, secret identity, blahblahblah, bit corny, but there's potential. Jimmy. All combat, deathseeker, and works for the opposite side. No, no, I expected this. Wait a minute. You are ALL underaged? And you go to the same highschool. Ehh.

Dave. Dave, Dave, Dave. I know I said that you don't have to be all combat or a diplomancer. But he doesn't have anything beyond rank. And you took the flaw Jew. They don't even have that one in the book! And you're in Japan! And Fetish: Unconscious Brown Women? Seriously? Fuck it, let's just play.

>Fetish: Unconscious Brown Women?
Oh god, that cracked me up.

>>15032581
I am ashamed to admit that I would play that.

>>15032632

It can get infinitely worse.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WRiovfWikqg&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ct5sajvGcq8

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the three of us play? Me and Jim already have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're both endlessly pontificating paper pushers. There's not a single combat skill or empathetic tic mark on either of these character sheets. And God-fucking-damn it all to the foot of Hel's own throne, Jim... you're playing a female... again? This isn't going to be another of your rape fantasy playgrounds again, I swear.

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right?

>Ok, but this better not take too long...

>>15032660
So, did the GM punch John's player in the throat, or did he just leave and John's player is still going on and on about Objectivism?

GM: Alright, high fantasy. What have you got for me?

P1: I have a gnome mage. 1st level, right?

GM: Yup, good. You?

P2: The greatest swordsman that ever lived!

GM: This is a starting game... you want to explain that to me?

P2: Um... I've been rotting in a cage for years? And I took, um, delusions of grandeur? And I'm a bastard?

GM: Heh, fine fine. *jots down notes for an extended escort mission*

Several sessions later....

GM: Where the hell did you guys learn how to roleplay?

>>15032655

That was horrifying.

Also, I'm uncomfortably aroused.

>>15032655
The fuck did I just watch?

>>15032660
So... Jim's playing Dagney... tell me the other guy is at least playing Ragner... I mean, at the start of his piracy career he's just a philosophy grad on his way to some cushy teaching gig. Actually... that might be a decent character...

>>15032443

Not darker, but certainly more bleak; the Gungrave anime. It takes a PREPOSTERONE fighting game that is basically a mafia-themed DMC and turns it into the single most soul-crushingly ruthless crime tragedy I've seen in any medium. Although it doesn't have the sheer dark scale of Bokurano, the sheer comprehensiveness with which it works its cruel magic makes it much more personal.

The actual narrative starts with the main characters getting every single person they know callously executed by a major mob figure, because the protagonist got involved in a trivial brawl.

This is the lightest the show ever is. At no point will it be this happy again.

Almost every single character ever named in the ENTIRE SHOW achieves their dreams, only to watch them burn to ash around them before they die cold and alone. Half of the characters are destroyed by betrayal before being killed by treacherous friends, and the other half sacrifice everything dear to them to their own ambitions before seeing it all crumble, and die knowing the price they truly paid for their ephemeral gains. Whenever the show runs out of 'good guys' that have some sympathy to kill off and has to kill a guy you hate, they immediately do everything they can to bring a sympathetic viewpoint to them, before, again, leaving them to die in the ruins of their dreams.

>>15032692

Code Geass as a dating sim.

A thing of terrible beauty.

The exception to this is the protagonist, who is different in that he never even gets what he wants. He sacrifices his ideals and ambitions to buy a chance to get to his love interest, but by the time she returns his feelings in full he feels so tainted by what he has done he rejects her utterly. He sacrifices his own humanity to protect those close to him, before being betrayed by his cloest friend, who executes him AFTER the protagonist shows him he cannot kill the man, even after everything he has done. He COMES BACK FROM THE DEAD to try and protect those still important to him, only to fail utterly as they are all killed. He kills everyone he ever knew in trying to protect the one thing his love left behind, and when at last he confronts his betrayer and friend, who has by now destroyed literally every single thing of worth in his life, realises he cannot kill him because he is the last remnant of the life he once had. And even THEN he kills him anyway, to save him from a cruel execution by those he betrayed, and dies himself. AND EVEN THEN, when he is dead, he STILL cannot be with the one he loves even now, because after he rejected her she fell in love with someone else.

By the time the credits roll, the only one left standing is a young girl who has seen every single person she ever cared for killed literally in front of her eyes.

After the last episodes rolled, I spent the next half hour just staring blankly at the screen, trying to come to terms with what the fuck I had just borne witness to. The entire thing left me feeling hollow for days as I tried to process it.

It's pretty grim.

"Your flaw is Dark Secret: Time Traveler? How would that even work?"

GM: Okay, let's get this game on the way. First, character sheets. Huh. This, this is weird. Kate, you're playing a vampire chick, right?

Kate: No, I'm playing a highschool guy who was almost turned into one.

GM: Ahha. Social skills only, Charming, and the most worthless powers of the template. Greg, I'd like to say that I'm apalled and horrified, but, well, you know what? I actually am. Exotic Weapon Mastery: Stationary? Pocket Dimension, Only Works On Stationary. And Weightless. Oh, and she's a sociopath.

Tim: Hey, we totally made up a group backstory like you asked.

GM: Yes I see. Jimmy's character has a lesbian crush on yours. And can punch anything to bits when in berserk. Dave. Your character is, what a surprise, useless. And you made a new flaw. Again. Constricted By Invisible Snakes. Oh, here's an interesting Advantage. Extremely Erotic. Well, that might, no, she's 14. God. Everyone else's a highscooler again.

>>15032719
>>15032727

I was very pleasantly surprised by the Gungrave anime. I really dug the Gungrave: Overdose game, though I didn't care for the original.

The thing that really struck me about the anime was that it was not afraid to take its time developing the characters. Everyone got a bit of back story and the plot kept moving at a good pace, but never felt rushed. I'd highly recommend it to anyone who enjoys gangland dramas.

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the three of us play? Me, Kelso, and Tina already have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're all bards.

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right?

>>15032946

Good god Overdose ran on meth and rule of cool, in the best possible way. Rock star ghost that uses a guitar that shoots lightning? Fuck yeah.

>>15033006

"Rocketbilly Reccadillac." The names were so American, you knew they had to be Japanese.

>>15032786
Is it wrong that I would enjoy having these players?

Except maybe vampire chick, she sounds too much like a twilight fangirl for me

rolled 2 = 2

>>15031831
FUCKING FINAL FANTASY TACTICS ''';


>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the three of us play? Me and sHAGGY already have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're both bards with no instruments and you both have flaw: tone deaf.

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right?

>>15033027

Juji Kabane, undead drug addled super soldier that wears a blind fold and uses his sense of smell to fight.

>>15033069
Special spell: MAGNETS

>>15032786
This, this intrigues me.

>>15033111
It's pretty good, though very harem. I left out some pretty interesting characters as well.

GM: Yay, I get to play with you guys again! YAY.

Tim: Dude, are you feeling okay? What's wrong with your face?

GM: I'm smiling! I'm thrilled to play with you guys. THRILLED!

Tim: I think the word your looking for is horrible rictus. Anyway, here are our characters for your supers game.

GM: Huh. So, you all work for an unnamed crime Syndicate? Interesting. And you play a Batman who kills. And shoots lightning. Kinda weird, but okay. Kate you know that Doll is a monster template?
You do? Hmm. And Dave plays a cat who can posess other animals. Nothing unusual here. And Jimmy plays your driver/everyman who's an alchoholic for justified reasons? This might be kinda cool.

AND THEN IT WAS.

how this didnt get posted is beyond me

>>15030699

> "Okay, Jim's made a murderous sociopath with a katana, and negative charisma. Ted's made a murderous sociopath with Gun Kata, Duel-Wield, and ambidextrous. Didn't I tell you this was a giant robot campaign?"
> "You told us it was a Fist of the North Star campaign. Look, can we pool our build points for a mech we pilot together?"

And then it was the best campaign EVER.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cHxnNJoVvYI

>>15033742

That, my friend, was the most fucking metal thing I ever watched. And I played Brutal Legend.

>>15033749
Brutal Legend looses Metal Points for having such annoying "strategy" segments, and for making half your solos clips from Painkiller without actually unlocking Painkiller till the final boss.
>>15033742
I feel I should remember this...

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the two of us play? I already have a character sheet ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You have no combat skills of any description and you're mute.

>Yeah, but look I took the extra points so I can create portals any time and can't die from falling. Why not give it a try? It's not like I'll make it past the first combat, right?

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the eight of us play? We already have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're all Dwarf Cheesemakers?

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first season, right?

Shit, failed greentexting:/
>>15034033

>>15034039

How does that even happen? Ha!

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the three of us play? Me and Jim already have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're a 12 year old and a dog.

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right?

>DM: As the blast cloud from the Antimatter bottle clears, you see that the creature is almost totally intact. As you watch, its head extends into a massive three part mouth and consumes the mecha standing in front of it. Allright, your mech gets absorbed by the monster Jessica. It shifts form to evade the auto destruct sequence of the base. Sara, your mecha is thrown into a shelter by the blast wave, you see Mike sitting in front of you.

>Sara: I ask him what the fuck he thinks he's doing.

30 minutes later

>DM: Allright, Unit-01 is out of power now. The monster starts bashing the core of your mecha, as it fractures you hear...

>Mike: It's not over yet.

>DM: Yes it is, you're out of power and you're down an arm, what could you possibly do.

>Mike: I still have fate points. I roll to go berserk like in that first fight.

30 minutes later

>DM: You do WHAT now?

>>15031019
I've been planning for a Rogue Trader version of that for months.
But I'm bad at making the story last beyond one session.

>GM: Anne, good to see you back.
>Anne: Good to be back!
>GM: But, uh, since you've been away for the two sessions, I had your character go comatose.
>Anne: Umm, okay?
>GM: And then, um, Shane's character... masturbated over her body.
>Anne: He did WHAT?
>Shane: It was totally justified in-character!
>Anne: You did WHAT?

>>15036371

>Evangelion CCG

I kinda want to see this now.

>>15036393
I'm not sure it was really a CCG, per se, as I don't think there was much in the way of cards to collect.
Unfortunately most of them weren't scanned or translated, anyways.

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the three of us play? Me and Jim already have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're both halfling rogues being chased by an entire empire. With a cursed item to boot.

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right?

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the three of us play? Me and Jim already have character sheets ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're both rogues.

>Yeah, we thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like we'll make it past the first combat, right?

>>15032660
lol'd

>Wait, you guys are all playing elves? And they're all related?

>Yup!

>This better not turn out like some hippy bullshit... You asked me to run something combat-heavy, how will I do that if you're trying to hug trees or something?

>We won't. We promise.

GM: "So, let me run over this one more time. You're both playing Warrior-Poets, again. Dave, you're playing your character from the last three campaigns. Again."

Dave: "Yeah, I'm playing this guy until he dies, dude. This is the luckiest goddamn character I've ever seen."

GM: "Yeah, I remember last time. You started a fistfight in the middle of a fucking minefield with Paul's character, and you still goddamn survived."

Paul: "Funny you should mention that.."

GM: "Wait, what? What the fuck, Paul. No, you got blown up in the minefield, you can't play as Frank again. Roll up a new character."

Paul: "No, wait a second, check it out. I redid all his stats and advantages and shit, I even wrote him a bunch of backstory to explain how he survived."

GM: "..What the fuck? Your strength and agility are both like twenty points higher than the human norm, you can- How did you think this would be balanced? And what the fuck is up with your weapon choice? You know this is a modern day black-ops campaign, right? Not Conan the Barbarian? Seriously Paul, what is with all this overpowered shit."

Paul: "Check out the disadvantages though, it all adds up, I swear."

GM: "..I notice you've taken 'Enemy: Dave's Character'."

Paul: "Yeah."

Dave: "Wait, what?"

Paul: "Dude, you killed me."

GM: "You know what? I'm going to allow this. Lets get started."

Dave: "I didn't sign up for this! Paul nearly killed me last time, if I have to bareknuckle fight him again-"

GM: "Funny you should mention that.."

>>15036526
"I can't believe you guys actually made it."
"Guess this is it though, isn't it? Collapsing mountain, no help..."
"You hear an eagle cry out above."

>>15039371
Reverse rocks-fall?

>>15039283

Uh, shouldn't it be last two campaigns? Because technically, this is Dave's third, if I got the order right.

Hoo, is going to be annoyed by the 4th campaign. And probably have his mind screwed with a bit.

Hope he likes playing the 5th campaign as an old man.

>Well, looks like the rest of the group has bailed on us, including the GM and we'll have to call it a night

>Hey, what about that horror campaign that you were working on? Can we run that instead?

>Uh, it's not really finished yet. I've got the general plot and a ton of NPC character sheets written up, but not much else.

>Well we can just work out the rest as we go along, what's the worst that can happen?

>>15032779
The chick reminds me of X-COM, but, what the hell is this supposed to be?

"OK, so I wanted to run a Transhuman Space game. You're the crew of a rescue vessel..."

>>Okay, lets get this started...wait, you're a druid?

>>yeah.

>>But...steve's a druid.

>>actually...so am I.

>>me too.

>>yeah, me to.

>>...What the fuck, guys? This was supposed to be middle/high school drama. how am I supposed to challenge five druids?

>>I don't know, throw aliens with rayguns at us or something.

>Well, the other guys have bailed on us. Looks like we'll have to call it a night.

>Can't just the two of us play? I already have a character sheet ready.

>Really? Let me see....are you kidding? You're the president of the United States! In Mech game!

>Yeah, I thought it would be awesome. Why not give it a try? It's not like I'll make it past the first combat, right?

>>15040165
nostalgia'd

[Scene GM's Garage. The air is blue with smoke. All are wasted]

GM: So, like you see all of the civilians frozen to stone. Also, the Mean Blue Goblins are prowling about looking for you.

Player 1: Is there anything in this building like, that we can like, use?

GM: Uh, make a search check.

[Dice are rolled]

GM: Okay, well this is actually a bandstand, you find a decent selection of instruments.

Player 2: Thank god, I can;t believe we forgot to bring those at the beginning of the quest. I mean, like were bards, without our instruments what are we?

The others: Whoa. Deep man.

Player 1: Look, these things outside like, Blue whotsits, are vulnerable to music like? So, let's get these instruments and bard powers activate on their anal regions?

Player 2: Sounds like a plan.

[The players use their bard powers to see off the large majority of the enemy army, and ressurect the people and unite them against the enemy.]

GM: Okay, now it seems that the boss of the Blue uh, whatever's, I forget, anyway they've set loose their big dood. He's uh, uh, uh, where's my notes?

Player 4: I think I might have used them to make spliffs. Sorry.

Player 1: Oh for fucks sake. Why do you have to sabotage everything we do man?

Player 4: Nobody told me we needed to bring roll-ups, and you used up all of mine yesterday.

Players 1: Lies. Look just make it up like if you have to.

GM: Right it's a big, uh, Glove. Rocket Glove.

Player 2: Rocket Glove? ROCKET GLOVE. ROCKET GLOVE! FUCKING ROCKET FUCKING GLOVE!?

GM: Uh, yes?

Player 2: SOD THAT SHIT. STAND BACK LADS. I'M SOLOING THIS MOTHERFUCKING GLOVE MYSELF.

GM: It's a pretty high level encounter, are you sure you want to try...

PLAYER 2: I'LL SHOW THAT MOTHERFUCKING GLOVE WHAT'S FOR! My character imiediately begins to combat it by making the words I say appear as large physical words. Just to add insult to injury it's a really gay song about love as well.

GM: Can, can he do that?

Player 1: At this point? His character's basically jesus.

Player 4: A taller jesus.

Player 3: Right.

MUSIC LIVES

rolled 28931 = 28931

>GM: Alright, this is a lot more players then I'm used to, but we'll give it a go.

>GM: Wait a second, you're all fighters except you... the Noble is an NPC class man.

>Anthony: Yeah, I thought it would be interesting. Why not give it a try? It's not like I'll make it past the first combat, right?

>>15031281
"Hey, it's not like I'll make it past the fourth combat."

DM: Well it seems everyone else has bailed. Shall we call it a night?

Hershel: Wait, didn't you have that mystery game you wanted to run?

DM: With only two people?

Luke: Yeah, we both made character for it a few months back.

DM: Alright, let me see 'em.

>looks over character sheets

DM: Sooooo, you're an archeologist and.....his kid apprentice?

Hershel: Yeah.

DM: Neither of you have any combat skills.

Luke: So? I thought this was a mystery game.

DM: Hershel, your character has max Charisma and Intelligence.

Hershel: He is a professor, you know.

DM: Whatever, let's do this. I love a challenge.

The epic tale of That Guy and That Super Special Snowflake banding together in the face of a railroading GM from hell and learning to roleplay in the process.

>>15040662
I'd watch it.

>>15040662
>years earlier, towards the end of a very successful campaign.

DM: Ok, so after the end of that you've all gathered in Simon's throne room. He's sitting on his throne and hearing your intelligence reports.
Michael: At this point my guy swaggers in and shows off his new wings.
Simon: Wings, eh?

>>!5040568

>one hour later

GM: You see a cat rooting through the garbage.

Hershel: You know, Luke, that reminds me of a puzzle...

GM: *sigh*

>GM: Well Roy, looks like it's just you and me. Guess we'll have to put off the campaign 'til next week.

>Roy: Let's just play through it anyway. You already have everyone's characters and it's CoC so we'll be needing extras anyway.

>GM: Are you kidding me? None of you read the briefing, there are characters who lived like 2000 years apart!

>Roy: Just roll with it, I'm sure you can come up with something...

>>15040166

MICHAEL!

>>15041009

See, this is why you should only give out XP for puzzles the GM makes.

>>15041024
Xel'lotath Santak Bankorok!
Xel'lotath Santak Bankorok!

>>15041248

RICHARD!

>>15041361
Needs more Pargon.

>>15041361
>>15041528
You guys are my new best friends.

PARGON
MANTOROK
PARGON
ANTORBOK
PARGON
MAGORMOR
PARGON

LOOK AT MY PURPLE CHOPPER