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  • File : 1320107742.gif-(38 KB, 341x330, earth.gif)
    38 KB EVO Quest - Part VI OP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/31/11(Mon)20:35 No.16800623  
    (Previous threads: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=EVO%20quest)

    You are not sure what you are; the sunfangs call you the Guardian of the Earth and their deity- but you know that you are no god.

    You started out as an overgrown cave salamander. Unlike most other creatures, though, you are still evolving, changing, and mutating, and can actually tap into the power of 1) THE MYSTERIOUS TIME STREAM, and 2) crystals that, when ingested, make you stronger, but kill everything else.

    And... you now own a tribe of lizardmen, have declared war on the elven woodfolk, and just finished killing their king by dropping most of a meteor on him, fatally warping him into ribbons of flesh, and FINALLY tearing him into his component parts. In that order.

    ... it has been a VERY strange couple of days.

    (continued)
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)20:40 No.16800680
    Fuck yes you are the best quest ever
    >> Nothingmancer 10/31/11(Mon)20:41 No.16800693
    >>16800680
    Damn straight.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)20:42 No.16800702
    oh fuck the hell yes
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)20:42 No.16800708
    GAME TIME
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)20:42 No.16800709
    Are you still hurt, oh salamander. Blorp if your all right.
    >> OP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/31/11(Mon)20:43 No.16800723
    >>16800623
    BUT FIRST:
    Last thread, some people very kindly pointed out to me that people who are equipped with heavy metal armor generally not have pockets, and therefore would have a VERY hard time reaching into a non-existent pocket and, with thick metal gauntlets, pull out a small crystal.

    ... somewhere, somehow, the auditors of reality are being bribed with shiny things to make them forget about this horrible breach of sense.

    >BONUS!
    ROLL 1d40 to decide between:
    1) Auto-successful upgrade to Bearex
    2) Bonus to the next time we do a MYSTERIOUS TIME STREAM (+1 Unnatural Power, +2 Body Part Improvements)
    3) Boost one NPC's abilities (Aazz (Wraith), Razz (Leafdancer), Seventeen (Blacksmith/Tinkerer))
    4) Sunfang Army Breakthrough (Spearmen Upgrade)
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)20:44 No.16800728
    rolled 7 = 7

    You know, I've been thinking about the whole "god" thing, and I've come to the conclusion that..isn't it belief that makes a god, a god? I mean, it doesn't matter how powerful you are, you remain but a man until people believe in you.

    What I'm trying to say is, to the sunfang, we are a god, and doesn't that belief make it true?
    >> Questor the Magnificent 10/31/11(Mon)20:45 No.16800739
    I want to get into this but I know almost nothing about it!
    >> weird (Pessimistic & Perverted White Knight) 10/31/11(Mon)20:45 No.16800741
    By the star deities, EVO quest when I am ready to punch and bite these people in the bank because one mildly polite SMS from the main office while I have 10 workers to pay who'd probably won't care about polite.
    >> Nothingmancer 10/31/11(Mon)20:45 No.16800742
    rolled 28 = 28

    >>16800723
    Army Breakthrough
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)20:45 No.16800743
    rolled 28 = 28

    >>16800723
    MYSTERIOUS TIME STREAM bonus. Lizardmen are expendable.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)20:46 No.16800750
    rolled 6 = 6

    >>16800723
    17 upgrade. benefits everyone.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)20:46 No.16800751
    >>16800723
    Let's boost Seventeen's powers, we haven't gotten to use him yet
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)20:46 No.16800754
    rolled 7 = 7

    Army breakthrough. Now that we're not a god, we'll need backup.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)20:47 No.16800759
    rolled 14 = 14

    >>16800751
    Forgot my roll
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/31/11(Mon)20:47 No.16800760
    >>16800728
    Yes, but we DID make that bargain to save our asses last time. And if we break that, well.

    It's difficult to start successfully harnessing that belief and ascend to divinity when other, bigger gods are lancing cosmic lightning bolts through your head.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)20:47 No.16800764
    rolled 25 = 25

    >>16800750
    I also vote for 17
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/31/11(Mon)20:50 No.16800802
         File1320108618.jpg-(126 KB, 1060x884, 1319939119427.jpg)
    126 KB
    >>16800739
    THEN YOU HAD BETTER START READING UP ON IT

    -- seriously, though, don't worry! I'll post stats after we decide which bonus to get; if you can roll a dice, you can definitely still participate.

    ... also, yes, this is OP, and I just remembered that I was planning to change my name.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)20:51 No.16800815
    rolled 5 = 5

    >>16800723
    We need to upgrade Bearex.
    Our last mistake was fighting outside the damn thing, and because of that a Shark Elf almost killed us...
    But actually, thinking about it, we can biomancy a good pilot seat inside him.
    BONUS FOR MYSTERIOUS TIME STREAM!
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)20:51 No.16800821
    Boost 17
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)20:51 No.16800824
    rolled 7 = 7

    >>16800723

    Mysterious Time Stream bonus. Enhancing our strength is the most important way we can serve the star-gods.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)20:52 No.16800832
    rolled 19 = 19

    >>16800760
    What I'm trying to say is we can join them among the stars. It's not the man; it's the followers.
    If they truly believe us to be a god, accept us as their god..doesn't that make it true?
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)20:53 No.16800839
    rolled 27 = 27

    >>16800802
    Look at that face. How could we not improve him.
    >> weird (Pessimistic & Perverted White Knight) 10/31/11(Mon)20:53 No.16800846
    rolled 19 = 19

    Toss-up between Razz and Seventeen,
    Tech/magic not tied to our powers, though I lean to Razz cause he'd be more loyal.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)20:53 No.16800851
    rolled 34 = 34

    >>16800821
    mistyped teh dice
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)20:53 No.16800853
    >No rolls over 30.
    Our desire for greatness has angered our benefactors.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)20:54 No.16800862
    rolled 21 = 21

    >>16800832

    I don't believe that. Gods are simply what people call super powerful beings. It's not the followers that make the god powerful, it's that the stronger the god the more followers it attracts.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)20:54 No.16800868
    rolled 23 = 23

    Spearmen Upgrade
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/31/11(Mon)20:57 No.16800905
    >>16800851
    >>16800821
    It looks like we're boosting 17! I'll apply the bonus later, with a huge >BONUS tag to let you guys know.

    BUT FIRST: STATS!
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)20:57 No.16800909
    >>16800862
    Gods by dictionary definition are one or more of the following:
    Creator of the Universe
    Ruler of the Universe
    A supreme being of a particular attribute (A god of Basketball for example), with no equal.

    We did not create the world, nor do we rule it. We are not peerless, we have come very close to losing before. Therefore, we are not a god.

    That isn't to say we can't earn the title, though.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)20:57 No.16800916
    rolled 24 = 24

    >>16800853
    Poppycock. If we are to face a false god we must become stronger ourselves.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)20:58 No.16800925
         File1320109106.jpg-(309 KB, 1600x1200, Mission_to_Saturn.jpg)
    309 KB
    rolled 30 = 30

    OP, can I get a new bonus not listed?

    Can we get some sort of magical weapon or armor that fell from the sky as a sign of the ancients favour?
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)20:59 No.16800934
    rolled 32 = 32

    >>16800925
    >>16800925

    Nevermind.
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/31/11(Mon)20:59 No.16800936
         File1320109155.jpg-(626 KB, 3000x2368, 1319935549654.jpg)
    626 KB
    CURRENT STATS:
    Large Vicious Salamander
    ______________________________________________________
    POWERS:
    Calming Aura, Level 2
    > Pacifies creatures; resisted by strong emotion.
    > 30 ft radius, weakens as it goes (Strongest at <10 ft)
    Shapeshifting/Body Sculpting, Level 2
    > Transform into the last creature EATEN/PARASITED, duration 15 min.
    > May also alter the SIZE of ANY Body Parts.
    Necromancy, Level 4
    > Can raise and animate THREE undeads (physical/spiritual), skill roll for size: 3+bears
    > If no commands are given, minions will return to you and await orders.
    > Can sense corpses in a radius
    Biomancy, Level 2
    > Can alter and sculpt any living bio-organic materials, skill roll for size: 2+bears
    > Contact time: 10 seconds
    > Can sense life in a radius

    (DORMANT)
    Shadow Travel, Level 0 (Dormant; Bear's Power)
    > Instantaneous travel between shadows. All other details unknown.
    > ???
    Starfall, Level 0 (Dormant: Tyrant King's Power)
    > MUCH weaker than the Tyrant King's meteor drop.
    > ???
    Mouth Laser, Level 0 (Dormant: Lizard-Bird's Power)
    > Fires your laser.
    > ???

    (continued)
    >> weird (Pessimistic & Perverted White Knight) 10/31/11(Mon)21:03 No.16800981
    Plot-wise -twists and unwritten narration aside- there are self-proclaimed or widely-acclaimed gods like Blorp and that god the woodfolk nobles keep mentioning. But then one anon rolled a nat 40 when proclaiming a prayer to the ancient star deities...

    And EVO/Blorp ran with it, even added that tidbit of a son/daughter asking his/her father not to worry about a journey/undertaking that he/she is going to take...

    Half-arsed prediction, this world is the child of Gaia and the EVO protagonist... And now it's helping us because that nat 40 prayer reached it. Or something similar.
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/31/11(Mon)21:03 No.16800986
         File1320109405.jpg-(348 KB, 2484x2000, 1319687741624.jpg)
    348 KB
    >>16800936
    ________________________________________________________
    BODY PARTS:
    Parasitic Mouth Hooks +2
    >Drains blood quickly, medium telepathy, grants control
    >High strength
    >Numbs Sensation
    Titanium Web Spinners OF LIFE
    >Shoots sticky web from ass, distance of 10 ft.
    >High strength. Nigh unbreakable; still flammable.
    >Slower than Rope Tongue.
    >Shits life.
    Rope Tongue
    >Sticky. 7 ft, retractable.
    >Faster than webs.
    Draconic Wings Lvl. 1
    >Weak; Duration 5 min, Height Low

    EYES: Base; small; Lowlight
    > Eight: Spiral Green
    JAWS:
    > Jaw Strength Lvl. 1
    > Mouth-Hooks+
    > Rope Tongue
    > Vocal Chords- Blorp, Gleep, Hurp.
    BRAIN:
    > +3 (Improved Info Gathering)

    BODY:
    > Titanium Web Spinners of Life
    > SKIN: Bone Armor+1 WITH SPIKES
    SIZE:
    > Muscle Mass Increase+1; 3 feet long
    LIMBS:
    > Rending Claws
    > Legs +1, RETRACTABLE
    > Draconic Wings Lvl. 1
    TAIL:
    > Whiplash Tail
    ________________________________________________________
    CRYSTALS:
    Yellow Crystal x1:
    > You can understand simple languages; other effects unknown.
    Red Crystal x1:
    > Gave you an evolutionary boost; other effects unknown.
    ________________________________________________________
    SUNFANG POPULATION:
    > 20 Clubbers
    > 13 Spearmen
    > 5 Leafdancers
    (7 Casualties- 5 clubbers, 2 spearmen)

    WOUNDED: (18 --> 10 Healed)
    5 Clubbers
    2 Spearmen
    1 Leafdancers

    LOOT:
    - Assorted Animal-Hide Books
    - 12 Light Armor Sets (Unusable)
    - 21 Copper-Headed Spears
    - 5 Exile Bands (Iron, No Crystals)
    ________________________________________________________
    NOTABLE MINIONS:
    Bearex: T-Rex skull with bear skull. Your champion.
    Razz: Leafdancer. Your mouthpiece, representative, and Godspoken.
    Aazz: Former Sunfang Chieftain, current ghost. First member of your Wraithguard.
    Zazz: Elder Leafdancer. Razz's boss. Old.
    Seventeen: Amazing blacksmith. Token Forgeslug.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:03 No.16800990
         File1320109435.png-(245 KB, 640x640, blorpface.png)
    245 KB
    HELL YEAH, BLORP QUEST! LET'S DO THIS SHIT!
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:03 No.16800991
    >>16800986
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LvtsP_Tqw2Y&feature=channel_video_title
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:06 No.16801036
    rolled 22 = 22

    >>16800909

    And whose criteria are those? Certainly not mine nor most ancient cultures in human history. A god does not have to follow or do any of those things to be considered a "god" by a culture. The only real thing that groups all the various meanings for what a "god" is, is the fact that they're usually powerful or super-human. Thus ruling out the possibility that the god became a god as a result of getting followers, followers who would not be worshiping the god in the first place if he was not a god.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:10 No.16801067
    >>16800991

    that theme songs gay.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:10 No.16801076
    >>16801036
    Those are the criteria of the Random House Dictionary © 2011.

    Maybe you'd prefer the Collin's English Dictionary:

    A supernatural being who is worshipped as the controller of some part of the universe or some aspect of life in the world, or is the personification of some force.
    >> weird (Pessimistic & Perverted White Knight) 10/31/11(Mon)21:11 No.16801083
    How'd the remaining Prince Slick's woodfolk slaves/meatshields fare? Had they decided to throw their lot with the Sunfangs?

    Also, how good is the set of eight spiral green eyes? Just base eyes but multidirectional and with intimidating factor?
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:13 No.16801098
    >>16801076

    Those are the monotheistic religion's definition of god . As i'm sure I already stated, there are many other cultures that have many other definitions for what a god is. The only thing linking those various criteria together is the fact most, if not all, are powerful supernatural beings, or things perceived to be powerful.
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/31/11(Mon)21:15 No.16801115
    >>16800986
    Only a few hours have passed since the end of your battle with King Selac; your entire tribe is still licking its wounds. You're still pretty damn beat up, thanks to your near-loss against King Selac, so your Bearex is carrying you around in its half-open T-Rex skull mouth.

    You walk away from the makeshift medical camp, having just finished healing as many as you could before your Titanium Webs of Life ran out of juice (most of the sunfangs didn't really mind getting healed by the essence of life coming out of your ass, but you will never NOT feel weird about it)...

    ... and Razz, your Godspoken, flags you down real fast. "My lord! We just finished fuckin' getting our scouts back, and HOLY SHIT THAT'S A BLUE CRYSTAL."

    You blink at the little blue crystal that you'd kept clasped between your front paws (wow, you were REALLY out of it after that fight, to have forgotten to eat this thing). And then you blink at Razz, who had jumped back about twenty feet and behind a tree.

    >BLORP?

    "S... sorry, my lord. It's just- those fuckin' things are real powerful," he says, slightly embarrassed. "So they're... you know. Really, REALLY bad news to those who get their shit wreaked by crystals in general."

    He pauses. "So, um, can you eat that scary fucking thing first? I can wait."

    You shrug.

    >MYSTERIOUS TIME STREAM EVOLVES YOU!
    ROLL 1d40! Choose:
    - 4 upgrades to 1 existing Unnatural Power
    OR
    - 2 upgrades to 2 existing Unnatural Powers
    >> weird (Pessimistic & Perverted White Knight) 10/31/11(Mon)21:16 No.16801117
    Turn iron collars into spear-tips. We'd fare better against woodfolks since it was mentioned that the woodfolk dislike iron, right?

    At any rate, what kind of metal did the King and the swordelves use for their weapons and armors?
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:17 No.16801136
    rolled 23 = 23

    >>16801115
    4 upgrades to necromancy
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:17 No.16801141
    rolled 10 = 10

    >>16801115

    Biomancy: +4

    Biomancy is the best way we can serve the ancients in our role as guardian of the earth.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:18 No.16801144
    rolled 34 = 34

    >>16801115
    2 upgrades to both necromancy and biomancy. They've both been really useful so far.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:18 No.16801151
    rolled 40 = 40

    >>16801115
    Oh, hell yes. Lets bump up Biomancy and calming aura.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:18 No.16801152
    rolled 12 = 12

    >>16801098
    and worship and we are clearly supernatural and the Sunfang do worship us so by that definition we are a god a minor on but still. Also in the realm of being a life/death god we know of none who tops us so there is that.

    But we maid an oath so i say we just claim to be the "avatar" of the true gods meaning according to us we are part of the true gods but not the whole
    >> weird (Pessimistic & Perverted White Knight) 10/31/11(Mon)21:19 No.16801155
    rolled 18 = 18

    Necro and Bio
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:19 No.16801156
    rolled 34 = 34

    >>16801115
    +2 to Biomancy and Necromancy, obviously. Our other crazy powers, dormant or active, can wait for now; mastery over life and death, it seems, is our thematic thang.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:19 No.16801159
    >>16801151
    Oh shit, do we get a bonus for that?
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:20 No.16801166
    rolled 37 = 37

    >>16801151
    Well, I think Necromancy would have been a better fit, but alright then, Biomancy takes the lead.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:21 No.16801175
    rolled 20 = 20

    >>16801115
    +4 to necromancy, let's make Bearex even more fuckhuge
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:22 No.16801181
    rolled 18 = 18

    Biomancy and teleport
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/31/11(Mon)21:23 No.16801195
    >>16801083
    Re: Woodfolk: They hung back during the battle; no one thought to equip them with any weapons.
    ... and we also scared the shit out of them with the femur incident, so they're kind of on the fence right now.

    Re: Eyes: The latter.

    >>16801117
    The woodfolk use bronze in their weapons.

    Make of that what you will.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:23 No.16801199
         File1320110639.gif-(1004 KB, 360x359, shitfuck.gif)
    1004 KB
    rolled 26 = 26

    >>16801151
    >nat 40 crit on the very first check of the thread.
    >> weird (Pessimistic & Perverted White Knight) 10/31/11(Mon)21:25 No.16801211
    Huh, nat 40.
    Well, Calming Aura is more of pacifist/tyrant path, depending on usage. Put on, drop minions, kill/defeat villain, decide fate of minions.

    Would Biomancy improve the webs of life and shapeshift by synergy?
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:27 No.16801236
    rolled 32 = 32

    >>16801211
    Biomancy gave us webs of life so i assume that gets better
    and hears hoping it has synergy wit shape shift
    >> weird (Pessimistic & Perverted White Knight) 10/31/11(Mon)21:34 No.16801297
    >>16801195
    Reiterate to the slaves that we'd welcome those who come with open arms, and eat the rest. They are welcome to pick woodfolk gears that survive the femur crunch (why'd we ever do that, oh, right, high roll).

    Someone roll the diplomacy, I always roll pessimisticly, and I think the dice knows.

    Start repairing damaged area with improved Biomancy, though healing our wounded comes first. That is, if we have the stamina left.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:36 No.16801313
    rolled 25 = 25

    Fuck man, we need more offense. I say we get 4 points in a new power, A Energy ball of pure burning plasma that we fire at shit with our hands(like a energy blast)
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:36 No.16801316
    rolled 6 = 6

    >>16801297
    rollin for diplomacy
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:36 No.16801318
    rolled 28 = 28

    >>16801195

    Use our new and improved aura to assuage there fears.
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/31/11(Mon)21:36 No.16801323
    >>16801297
    sloooooooow dooooooooooown

    I haven't even gotten to the results of the LAST roll!
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:37 No.16801337
    rolled 8 = 8

    >>16801323
    FUCK YOU! I'll kick you in the face with my ENERGY LEGS!
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:39 No.16801348
    rolled 4 = 4

    >>16801297
    No, no, we don't eat everyone who isn't joining us. We eat everyone who stands against us, because fuck them we're taking this forest back. And the Woodfolk aren't the problem, it's, from what little we know, the horrible oligarchical asshole dynasty of Crystal-blessed Woodfolk. We're liberating the Woodfolk, blorp damn it. If you want to join us? Great! Let's bring peace and prosperity and all that good stuff. Don't want to join us? Stay out of our way, cockbite.

    Rollan to diplomance the woodfolk into believing in us who believes in them and joining us in our cause to help liberate the forest from all tyrants. And that, perhaps, when fighting monsters, we must all remember not to become them, yes?
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:42 No.16801385
    rolled 26 = 26

    >>16801348
    I change my vote to this
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/31/11(Mon)21:42 No.16801387
    >>16801151
    >HOLY FUCKING 40
    Biomancy +2 (40 BONUS: +1) --> Lvl. 5
    > Your Webs of Life now grant healing over time... and you can use them as ranged focal points for your Biomancy.
    > You can now spit little babby parasitical mouth-hooks.
    Calming Aura +2 (40 BONUS: +1) --> Lvl. 5
    > LOVE AND PEACE! LOVE AND PEACE!

    When the metaphysical dust clears, you... holy shit, you feel like you just ate a dozen magical leylines. For BREAKFAST. Except healthier and with less of a tendency to rupture the fabric of reality and call in fifty trillion hyperdimensional monsters from beyond time and space.

    Whatever just happened, you think you can end war, spread peace, and shit enough life to revive a long-dead planet.

    Razz breathes an audible sigh of relief. "Oh, fan-fucking-tastic! My lord... I just wanted to let you know that-"

    He starts counting off on his fingers. "First, we got 8 new recruits wandering in from the surrounding forests, and second, the scavengers have just given me their report!"

    >BLORP?

    "... huh? Sorry, my lord, you'll have to bite my neck to HOLY FUCKING SHIT WHAT THE HELL AAAAAGH--" he shrieks as you spit a mini-parasite into his neck, causing him to stagger and fall, flailing like someone being strangled.

    >BLORP.

    "... oh... oh, yes, I can hear you now." Razz picks himself up off the ground, staring at the little... thing lodged in his neck. "Um. If you have time, my lord, they want you to go over to the meteor. Seems pretty goddamn important."

    You think for a second, tilting your head... and figure that you can take care of two things first before heading over.

    >COMMAND?
    (CHOOSE TWO TASKS, aside from "going to the meteor.")
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:46 No.16801436
    rolled 7 = 7

    Talk to 17
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:46 No.16801440
    rolled 1 = 1

    >>16801387
    Heal the wounded with our LIFE WEBS,
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:47 No.16801451
    rolled 6 = 6

    Talk to 17
    and heal more minions(i assume the cristal alows us some more heal juice)
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:47 No.16801453
    rolled 2 = 2

    >>16801387

    Fabricate Life-Web armor for our soldiers in league with the Blacksmith, so that our soldeirs may have regenerating health capabilities.

    JUST LIKE IN CALLADOOTY
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:48 No.16801459
    rolled 14 = 14

    >>16801440
    Welp. It appears we ate them, instead. Hey, meat is good, right? Lets hope they dont kill us for that.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:48 No.16801462
    >>16801387
    Diplomance those woodfolk using our new aura, and check up on 17. I want to see how he improved.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:48 No.16801464
    rolled 29 = 29

    See if we can get Seventeen to forge some armor/weapons, also check up on Bearex
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:49 No.16801472
    rolled 9 = 9

    this is a good idea
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:49 No.16801477
    Diplomance the woodfolk using Calm lv 5, and heal our dudes with life webs.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:49 No.16801478
    rolled 12 = 12

    >>16801464
    >>16801453

    Combine these ideas.

    Create some web-weaved regenerating armor for our soldiers.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:50 No.16801482
    rolled 27 = 27

    >>16801477
    Fuck
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:50 No.16801483
    rolled 39 = 39

    >>16801316
    >>16801318
    >>16801348
    >>16801385
    This 'un, in addition to asking how bad things are in the Woodfolk capital, and seeing what spectre Aazz thinks of how we're doing- and maybe see about reviving him properly. No more spectre gittery; we have enough necromancy and biomancy to truly revive him, no?

    For tasks that do not require our direct interaction with anything, have our underlings pass on that we need to create some delicious iron weapons- have 17 get right on it- and maybe smelt and reforge the elves' ruined bronze armor. Send some scouts to make long-range observations of the woodfolk crystal-pit.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:50 No.16801485
    rolled 14 = 14

    >>16801453
    This. If our words won't convince our enemies to join us, our soldiers being seemingly immortal will.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:51 No.16801494
    rolled 40 = 40

    >>16801387

    Heal the wounded.

    See what Aazz is up to.
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/31/11(Mon)21:52 No.16801504
    >>16801494
    >>16801483
    Alright, stopping rolling!
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:52 No.16801505
    >>16801494
    >nat 40
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:53 No.16801514
    rolled 5 = 5

    >>16801387

    Find the largest, most amazing part of the meteor, shit a ton of webs of life everywehre, and make that our new home.

    Either that or find a place in the forest, which ever place commands more magical power and will make the best location for an awesome shrine/palace.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:53 No.16801518
         File1320112434.gif-(849 KB, 157x120, 1311233227757.gif)
    849 KB
    rolled 26 = 26

    >>16801494
    ... Ho... How...

    This quest is insane. I have NEVER seen so many crits so consistently in anything ever. On account of the 39 & 40, maybe combine these two posts' actions?
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:55 No.16801538
    >>16801518
    I get the feeling that even if we switched to a d100 we'd still be getting an outrageous number of 100's and 99's.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:56 No.16801541
    >>16801518
    The Random Number gods know a good thread when they see it, and are expressing their pleasure with the OP.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:57 No.16801551
    rolled 7 = 7

    pleas combine the 39 and the 40
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)21:59 No.16801568
    rolled 27 = 27

    >>16801387

    God damn it man. I can only drawfag so fast. I am still working on the LAST evolution. Now we have detachable lampry minions? The things I do for you people. Also, we should get those parasites some mantis shrimp upgrades for their spikes. Nothing says "fuck you" like a mantis shrimp punch to the jugular.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:03 No.16801622
    rolled 16 = 16

    >>16801568
    Fuck mantis shrimp, let's make them super-pistol shrimp, using a version of the Lizard-Bird's death ray from clacking their claws together to make a tiny fusion reaction.

    Nature is hardcore like that. He/she/it's created working semi-plasma weapons... IN SHRIMP.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:04 No.16801624
    I have to ask, when are we going to upgrade the freaking shadow Travel and the damned Mouth Laser?
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:08 No.16801683
    rolled 38 = 38

    we can skip the mouth lazer i just want the shadow ravle and more necro
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/31/11(Mon)22:11 No.16801719
    >>16801494
    >>16801483
    First, you hash out some administrative things with Razz. Like the Forgeslug.

    You kind of want to get Seventeen working on your armor and weapons, since all of your troops- and you DO mean, ALL OF YOUR TROOPS- have been going into battle either naked, or in thin animal skins cloaks (which is pretty much the same thing). Their weapons were also scrounged up from star-gods-knows-where.

    Next, you tell Razz that, in no uncertain blorps, you want scouts going out to the Northwestern Woodfolk Pit to get a bead on things. You make damn sure that Razz passes along word that any scouts who either reveal their position to the elves or forget their objective will 1) be denied alcohol for three months, and 2) have their shiny things privileges revoked for good.

    Once you finish THAT, it's time to skedaddle. Thankfully, MYSTERIOUS TIME STREAM always seems to heal you up to full, so you stand up and-

    "HOLY FUCKING SHIT!"

    ... you make a mental note to tell Razz to stop being such a drama queen about everything. The leafdancer's pointing at you.

    "My lord! Your... your goddamn wings...! They're- it became-"

    You look back behind you. Where your wings once were, there is a cloak. If blazing determination could be captured, bottled up, and used to dye cloth, that's what color the damn thing is. Mystified, you try to spread your wings, and the cloak automatically shifts back into your draconic wings.

    Hell, it's almost as if someone up there rolled up to the max number when they requested that you get shades and a cape! ... is what you WOULD think, but regrettably, you're nowhere near evolved enough to make sarcastic meta-references.

    With a lighthearted BLORP, you soar back up into the skies. Healing the wounded is easy enough; your webs are now MUCH more potent than before, and it only takes you half an hour to work through the rest of the wounded.

    (continued)
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:11 No.16801722
    >>16801683
    >nat 38

    Jesus, this Quest's get some high rolls.

    No, the laser has potential to be awesome. We could make it so every single damn inch of our body can shoot super beams of death, and that's just the most straighforward use I can think of for now
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/31/11(Mon)22:12 No.16801737
    >>16801719
    Everyone's now back up to fighting strength... or they will be, once they get some rest.

    Your next stop? Aazz, and then the woodfolk that you have under your rule. ... thing.

    As for Aazz, he's out training the sunfolk spearmen, and is in fine condition: the ghost's yelling them through as many drills as he knows, generally from observation of woodfolk spearmen.

    Despite the fact that he is (or was, before he died and lost his weapon) the best with a club, you note that where melee fighting is concerned, he really seems to know his shit.

    "My lord!" Aazz slams a fist into his spectral chest in salute as you approach. "Can you believe these fucking guys!? They can't decide which goddamn fighting style they want to GO with!" he snarls. "I mean, fuckin' LOOK at them!!" You peer over, blinking all of your eyes at different times.

    The spearmen are... actually having a heated argument. Half of them have their spears gripped in one hand and a shield in another, gesturing wildly and falling into a defensive pose; the other half are wielding their spears two-handed and jumping around like hyperactive crickets.

    "They were experimenting during the last battle," Aazz grumps. "We don't have the manpower to let them split into two groups, and I REALLY think we should let their goddamn brains focus on mastering ONE fucking battle style."

    You listen with half an ear; you're wondering if Aazz isn't more useful as a living, breathing Sunfang rather than a wraith.

    "What do you think, my lord?" Aazz says, looking to you for guidance. "Both styles look really fuckin' promising, but..."

    >COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:16 No.16801782
    >>16801719
    >Hell, it's almost as if someone up there rolled up to the max number when they requested that you get shades and a cape! ... is what you WOULD think, but regrettably, you're nowhere near evolved enough to make sarcastic meta-references.
    BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA. This is the best quest ever. Kudos to you, OP.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:16 No.16801786
    rolled 31 = 31

    >>16801737
    Shield and spear, as far as I've seen there hasn't really been any cavalry to deal with so the two-handed "pike" style wouldn't be as usefule. Plus, Spartans anyone?
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:17 No.16801793
    rolled 9 = 9

    The Spartans used shield walls and they were the best goddamn fighters of their day!

    If it's good enough for Leonidas, it's good enough for us!
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:17 No.16801797
    rolled 38 = 38

    >>16801737
    So wait, we have to choose between Shield Wall Pikemen or FUCKING FINAL FANTASY DRAGOONS?

    ....I want the Fucking Dragoons. As long as we make them bitchin' Dragoon armor.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:17 No.16801800
    rolled 35 = 35

    >>16801737
    Spear and shield. They're best suited to holding the enemy in place while our heavy hitters like Bearrex and Aazz smash them.
    >> dice+1d40 Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:17 No.16801801
    Spear and shield, of course. We need shields if we want an organized army.
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/31/11(Mon)22:18 No.16801811
    >>16801568
    >>16801622
    I actually kind of imagine them looking like our parasitic mouth-hooks. Kind of like Thing from the Addams Family, except about fifty times more horrifying.

    .... of course, that's liable to change when we get to the next MYSTERIOUS TIME STREAM, I think.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:18 No.16801815
    rolled 10 = 10

    >>16801737

    Shield and Spear. It's the shield and spear that will be most useful to our troops.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:19 No.16801823
    rolled 9 = 9

    >>16801737
    Phalanx it up. The phalanx in the ancient world was pretty much unbeatable, and the Greeks used it to stomp ass all over their peninsula.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:19 No.16801827
    rolled 37 = 37

    >>16801737
    Before we go on to the Woodfolk, we do have to deal with Aazz's dilemma. Make sure that BOTH fighting styles are remembered and written into the Book of War. Wait, do we have a Book of War? Fuck, man, Aazz should get to writing a Book of War. Considering our lack of manpower, while the Spartan technique is promising, being able to strike and bugger off- and being better able to set a spear against a charge- is more useful to us at the moment.

    Alternatively, use both but keep them in ONE group; have a frontline and flank of Spartan-styled troops and a back line of pike/spearmen. Best of both worlds. They can fight as a group just fine, or split up. Teamwork is essential, but so is personal combat ability. Focus on the teamwork and combined formation for now, because the Sunfang are already pretty great at savage fighting, guerilla warfare and personal combat.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:20 No.16801828
    rolled 5 = 5

    I say we go wit the Jumping thing because in the trees our minions rule at jumping where as trees fuck up a phalanx by the time we need that we will have enough solders to split.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:21 No.16801842
    rolled 19 = 19

    >>16801719
    Remember, we still serve the Outer Gods and act as their avatar on earth.
    Or do we? Let's give the dice a chance.
    1-10: The outer gods stopped giving a shit
    11-39: Still following the outer gods.
    40: The outer god -is- us. Or, more accurately, us from the future.
    >> Nothingmancer 10/31/11(Mon)22:22 No.16801859
    rolled 12 = 12

    >>16801827
    I support mixed strategy.

    >Strategic iumvbist
    We also need to make an iumvbist to help our tactical genius.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:22 No.16801860
    rolled 17 = 17

    >>16801842
    well, someone doesn't believe in the sunfangs who believe in us.
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/31/11(Mon)22:23 No.16801861
         File1320114183.jpg-(35 KB, 260x390, 1318035100506.jpg)
    35 KB
    >>16801842
    STATUS QUO MAINTAINED
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:23 No.16801865
    rolled 19 = 19

    >>16801737
    A Shield in one hand.
    A Spear in two hands.
    What, they only have 2 hands?
    Biomancy up some more hands.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:25 No.16801890
    rolled 39 = 39

    >>16801737

    Train in both styles. Use as the situation calls for it, to be determined by the assigned general.
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/31/11(Mon)22:28 No.16801915
    Vote's over!

    >>16801890
    >>16801797
    >>16801827
    Going with these: training in both. Time is limited, though, so prioritizing dragoon training first.
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/31/11(Mon)22:33 No.16801975
    >>16801797
    >>16801827
    >>16801890
    It's a close choice, but you figure that you should go with the hit-and-run tactics of... of whatever the hell they're doing.

    You pause for a second.

    >BLORP?

    "Eh? Teach them in BOTH?" Aazz rubs his chin thoughtfully. "... well, I GUESS we can try somethin' like that. Dunno how good they'll be if we train 'em in both fuckin' styles, but they'll fuckin' listen to their ol' chieftain, eh? Damn straight!"

    He grins that toothy grin of his. "And don't worry, ol' Aazz has got ALL that shit memorized right the fuck up here," he adds, tapping his ghostly temple with a ghostly claw. "If we get enough guys to get two squads goin', just give me the word, eh?"

    You give him a nod and a BLORP. And then... you pause for a moment, giving Aazz a once-over. You don't really think you HAVE the materials with you, but you decide to give reviving him a try.

    >REVIVIFICATION ATTEMPT!
    FIRST THREE 1d40 ROLLS, 35 OR HIGHER!
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:34 No.16801987
    >>16801975
    IT IS ALIVE!
    >> Nothingmancer 10/31/11(Mon)22:35 No.16801993
    rolled 34 = 34

    >>16801975
    AWWWWWW YEEEEEEEAAAAH
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:35 No.16801996
    rolled 2 = 2

    >>16801975
    DICE GODS, GUIDE MY ROLL
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:35 No.16801997
    rolled 17 = 17

    >>16801975

    Phoenix Down!
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:35 No.16802000
    rolled 18 = 18

    >>16801987
    Oops :P
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:35 No.16802001
    rolled 6 = 6

    >>16801975
    LIVE, DAMN YOU! LIIIIIIVE!
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:35 No.16802003
    rolled 10 = 10

    >>16801975
    Why not just Biomancy up some extra arms so they can do both styles at once?
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:35 No.16802006
    >>16801993

    So close, and yet so far.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:36 No.16802011
    rolled 1 = 1

    LIVE
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/31/11(Mon)22:37 No.16802025
    >>16802003
    It's not really a matter of how many arms they have; it's more that the Spartan style requires you to be locked in place, while the Dragoon style needs you to jump around like a bouncy ball.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:38 No.16802033
    Actually, why aren't we sharing our evolution power with our Sunfangs? We should have enough biomancy to make some Sunfangs evolve.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:40 No.16802056
    >>16802033

    EVO power is something specific to us in this tribe, but we can use the biomancy for temporary changes I think. That might have changed with the increase in biomancy though, we haven't tried yet.
    >> weird (Pessimistic & Perverted White Knight) 10/31/11(Mon)22:41 No.16802066
    . . . Do those baby-parasites magically transfer blood to us? If not, we need to make it so next upgrade.
    Regen armor+transfer parasite = bloodbank minions.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:41 No.16802071
    rolled 40 = 40

    >>16802025
    I think we've really missed out on the all-shield style of combat. It's a bludgeon, a blade (if you build it right) and a wall. Two hands, two shields? It's the educated choice.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:42 No.16802075
    rolled 40 = 40

    >>16802025
    Mmm. But since we're teaching BOTH-really, a new school born from the intermixing, honestly- the end result will be that they can jump around like a bouncy ball or stand their ground with either a spear & shield or long spear, yes? Versatility is das guut. They won't be picking up either quite as well as if we specialized at first because we're faffing about with stuff that has yet to really come into the Sunfang's military tradition, but they'll be better off later and still capable of standing up to the shiteating Woodfolk tyrants for now.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:43 No.16802094
    >>16802071

    Dual-dagger-bucklers? But then we lose the range we have with our spears...

    Unless they also hold the spears.
    >> Nothingmancer 10/31/11(Mon)22:43 No.16802095
    rolled 1 = 1

    >>16802071
    >>16802075
    >Not using those crits to revive Aazz
    WHY.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:43 No.16802098
    rolled 6 = 6

    >>16802071
    >>16802075
    Lol. Two 40s.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:43 No.16802099
    rolled 40 = 40

    >>16802071
    >>16802075
    Wow.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:44 No.16802101
    >>16802033
    Kinda like changing a few to be our elite guard?
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:44 No.16802107
    rolled 13 = 13

    >>16802099
    ......a dice god endorsement? I think so.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:45 No.16802109
    rolled 16 = 16

    Dammit guys, stop rolling when we don't need it.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:46 No.16802118
    rolled 10 = 10

    >>16802071
    >>16802075
    >>16802099
    ... TWO- FUCKING HELL, THREE- NATURAL FORTIES WITHIN A MINUTE OF ONE ANOTHER.

    THE FUCK.

    ALRIGHT THEN. APPARENTLY, NOW THAT WE'VE SET OURSELVES UP, THE SUNFANG MILITARY IS TAKING TO THE BOOK OF WAR LIKE BLOODTHIRSTY DUCKS TO RED-TINTED WATER.

    The hell are we going to use that extra, undedicated nat 40 for, though?
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:46 No.16802124
    rolled 40 = 40

    >>16802099
    >>16802075
    >>16802071

    Make that three crits!
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:46 No.16802125
    rolled 16 = 16

    >>16802099
    You fools! Your rolling out all 40s.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:47 No.16802137
         File1320115654.jpg-(147 KB, 632x576, 1313186030875.jpg)
    147 KB
    >>16802124
    ME GUSTA
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:47 No.16802140
    rolled 18 = 18

    >>16802124
    What the FUCK?
    >> Nothingmancer 10/31/11(Mon)22:47 No.16802148
    >>16802124
    >>16802099
    >>16802098
    >>16802075
    >>16802071
    Everything is dead.
    All of it.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:48 No.16802156
    Damnit guys, stop wasting the 40s!
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:48 No.16802158
         File1320115719.jpg-(16 KB, 381x365, 1296160872901.jpg)
    16 KB
    >>16802124
    >>16802099
    >>16802075
    >>16802071

    LOVE IS OVER
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:49 No.16802165
         File1320115764.gif-(1.9 MB, 420x236, shockedbird.gif)
    1.9 MB
    rolled 14 = 14

    >>16802124
    this isn't happening

    this can't be happening

    jesus christ what

    four natural forties out of nowhere

    this is a statistical improbability of massive proportions
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:49 No.16802170
    rolled 1 = 1

    >>16802124
    Nobylan and Mitenun, make this the 5th 40!
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:50 No.16802178
    rolled 39 = 39

    Holy fuck, we're going to be rolling in upgrades if this shit keeps up
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:50 No.16802180
    rolled 20 = 20

    >>16802170
    AAlright, the bonanza is through. Whether it will mean anything? Only the OP will know. Time to sit tight and wait for our leader to speak the words of God. ...unless this is a forty, then go nuts :)
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:51 No.16802187
    rolled 2 = 2

    >>16802170
    That's what happens when you invoke The Lady.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:52 No.16802207
    rolled 29 = 29

    Now we shall never roll above 50%.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:52 No.16802209
    rolled 11 = 11

    >>16802170
    Okay, fuck Mitenun and Nobylan.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:54 No.16802223
    rolled 18 = 18

    THe DIce gods Favour us!
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)22:55 No.16802235
         File1320116142.jpg-(9 KB, 246x245, 1287449266617.jpg)
    9 KB
    rolled 34 = 34

    >>16802071
    >>16802075
    >>16802099
    >>16802124
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/31/11(Mon)23:00 No.16802286
    >>16801996
    >>16801997
    As much as you strain, sadly, you don't manage to revive Aazz; all he does is sneeze.

    "That's weird, I didn't think I could fuckin'-"

    >>16801993
    >34 out of 35 (AND ALL THE FUCKING 40s EVER)
    >NEAR MISS(+) BONUS!?

    - and then Aazz is staring at the spectral club that's now in his hand: the ghost of the King of Clubs, his favorite weapon in life.

    It's no longer a mere bone, though; you can't really tell what's going on, but it's as if someone embroidered it with gold, spikes, and, oh, the souls of all sunfang chieftains that came before him. Aazz gives it a few powerful swings, and laughs uproariously as it's surrounded in a ghostly aura and the spectral roars of the ancestors ("SUUUUCK IIIIIIIT, FUCKERRRRRS").

    "Holy shit! Guardian, you're the fuckin' BEST! It's like Broday come months early!" he cackles.

    >GLEEP?

    "Yeah, one of our holidays. You're supposed to give thanks to the world for being so goddamned nice as to breathe life into every fucking one of us, and be awesome to everyone in return." Aazz makes a face. "Nowadays, everyone's just in it for the fucking food and presents. Fuckin' eggspawn these days, eh? Damn straight!"

    Bemused, you take off to go have a chat with the woodfolk.

    (continued)
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/31/11(Mon)23:01 No.16802293
    >>16802286
    Unsurprisingly, the woodfolk largely keep to themselves in one of the undamaged mud-huts next to the meteor; you can hear them murmuring amongst themselves. Something about "... with a femur!"

    ... when they all turn to stare at you with frightened eyes, you belatedly remember that you forgot to bring a translator with you... but, eh, there's an easy solution to that.

    Ten mini-parasites and a LOT of calming aura later, you BLORP at them reassuringly, telling them that they will not be mashed under a dinosaur's knee, and that they have nothing to fear from you as long as long as they obey your very simple rules of DON'T SABOTAGE SHIT OR KILL US AND/OR EACH OTHER.

    It's surprisingly easy to do so. That in itself tells you something about the capital, but you ask anyway.

    "It's real simple," one says. "You're in one of three things: the crystal-favored and their friends and family, the military, or..." He cracks a humorless grin. "... everyone else. The cattle who makes everything our Tribe needs to live and fight."

    "And most of that goes to the military and the crystal-favored," another woodfolk adds.The problem is that... most of 'everyone else' is so into the crystal-favored's god that they really don't mind."

    That seems to be all the information they can give you, so you throw your cloak over one shoulder, saunter out of the hut, and fly off toward the meteor.

    (continued)
    >> Indonesian Gentleman 10/31/11(Mon)23:01 No.16802296
    rolled 12 = 12

    >>16802170
    Proof that the Dice Gods have a sense of humor.
    I say we 'keep' the extra 40s as 'fate' points or whatever that we can use in the future to auto-deny a critical failure.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:04 No.16802311
    rolled 40 = 40

    Setting up a betting pool right now, one theoretical dollar that the Woodfolk have a crystal-user bard that keeps the masses happy and serving. OP can bet, I guess, even though that might be cheating.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:04 No.16802318
    rolled 33 = 33

    >>16802293
    So we have some craftsmen and farmers, huh. Learn what they can do later.
    >> Milo 10/31/11(Mon)23:05 No.16802320
    >>16802286
    You're a good man OP, a good man indeed.

    Also, >>16802311
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:05 No.16802321
    rolled 14 = 14

    >>16802311

    Then we need to go kill them and take it.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:05 No.16802324
    rolled 22 = 22

    >>16802311
    Jesus fuck another 40
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:06 No.16802337
    rolled 14 = 14

    >>16802311
    Well, they do now, numbnuts.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:06 No.16802341
         File1320116806.gif-(2 MB, 341x321, bertmad.gif)
    2 MB
    rolled 34 = 34

    >>16802311
    HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT KEEP HAPPEENNIINNGGG
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:08 No.16802353
    rolled 22 = 22

    >>16802311
    and dubs i do believe the dice gods agree now we just need to convince the OP
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:08 No.16802358
    DAMMIT this is what I get for going to a halloween party instead of staying in tonight.

    Hope you all didn't fuck up too badly yet.
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/31/11(Mon)23:08 No.16802364
         File1320116927.jpg-(25 KB, 216x282, 1319855794114.jpg)
    25 KB
    >>16802296
    if i did that

    we end up with a few thousand destiny points to spend when we actually do fail

    AND THAT WOULD BE RIDICULOUS
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:09 No.16802371
    rolled 35 = 35

    >>16802358
    We have all the luck. No other Quest will ever roll a crit again.
    >> Milo 10/31/11(Mon)23:10 No.16802379
    >>16802358
    You wouldn't believe the number of forties.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:11 No.16802395
    rolled 39 = 39

    Well if you give us a cap of say 10 then we would be forced to spend them regularly.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:14 No.16802420
    rolled 31 = 31

    >>16802395
    Not if we keep making them.
    Fuck Nobylan
    Fuck Mitenun
    Praise the Outer Gods.
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/31/11(Mon)23:17 No.16802463
    >>16802293
    You reach the side that's still suspended and touch down right where the support pillars (vines and bark) meet the meteor; what you initially took as one of the craters actually seems to be a hole leading deeper into the space rock.

    The scouts scramble out and line up in front of you, saluting like nobody's business. "We found some real fuckin' shiny rocks!"

    >... bl... orp.

    Another scout pipes up. "Yeah! So many fucking rocks! .. oh, and some huge cave that's goddamn huge. There's so much fucking room in there, but- look, the space rocks are so goddamn shiny, aren't-"

    >GLEEP.

    It takes a few minutes to convince them to fuck the space rocks and take you into this cavern- which they do.

    They weren't kidding. It's like the goddamn thing was custom made to be a city; the cave spans most of the meteor's interior, with natural shelves forming along the edges. Here and there, light streams in from small craters and holes in the sides and tops of the thing. There are a few unconnected smaller rooms accessible from other entrances, as well, and...

    You could EASILY fit the Sunfang Tribe in this thing, and it's inhabitable with some work. Hell, with the numbers you have now, you could fit them in a few fucking times over! The Sunfang'll want trees, but you could plant a few with your Biomancy.

    ... still, you have a few options at this point; your scouts aren't going to come back for a little while. You've got your armor and weapons (and Seventeen) to check up on, but- frankly, you can set the Sunfangs onto whatever tasks you can think up.

    >COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:19 No.16802478
    rolled 23 = 23

    >>16802463
    I say we check up on Seventeen
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:20 No.16802483
    rolled 3 = 3

    >>16802463
    Command:
    See if we can use Necromancy to raise the ghost of the king we killed. We can support 3 undead.
    Also see if we can use Biomancy to give Bearrex some fucking wooden Arms or Tentacles or Legs or Jaws or something up until his mass limit.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:20 No.16802484
    rolled 16 = 16

    >>16802463
    Let's check on the armor and weapons. if our spearmen are going to be dragoons, then our clubbers need to be ded fuckin 'ard. We should also probably think about training them with sword and board or something.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:20 No.16802488
    rolled 9 = 9

    Wait, shiny rocks? In a meteor? METEOR ORE?! Set some Sunfang gathering it, to be brought to Seventeen and examined for use.
    >> Milo 10/31/11(Mon)23:20 No.16802493
    rolled 9 = 9

    >>16802463
    Set the Sunfang to moving themselves into the space rock city, now to be known as Salamandrosa. Then start using our Biomancy to turn the inside of the rock into a sweltering mini-jungle perfect for our chosen people.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:21 No.16802494
    rolled 31 = 31

    >>16802463
    Try using Biomancy to turn trees or grass into meat.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:21 No.16802500
    rolled 11 = 11

    >>16802483
    We already did raise him, and then tore him apart body and soul piece by piece.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:21 No.16802503
    rolled 6 = 6

    >>16802463

    Do this: >>16802318
    We need to know what they can do.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:22 No.16802508
    rolled 1 = 1

    >>16802463
    get bearrex to his weight/mass limit in bones
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:22 No.16802510
    rolled 12 = 12

    >>16802463
    Seed the cave before we leave with the SHITE OF LIFE. See how Seventeen is doing in forging us iron armaments. Oh, and while we're at it, commission some tools! Maybe with spare bronze. That way we can start mining and shaping the meteor as we wish.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:23 No.16802522
    rolled 18 = 18

    >>16802420
    But if we keep making them that means we have to keep below the cap or we lose are cool fate points so we have to balance our reserve versus losing points a reserve of 1 for example means we can ether keep one just in case or keep burning it to rock out on little things but likely not have it when it is life or death 2 allows us one just in case and to rock the little shit more just gives us a bigger reserve but enough game design theory let op say what he will (I like 2-4) also they make us harder to kill on fluke bad roles and that is good.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:26 No.16802561
    rolled 9 = 9

    >>16802463
    :)
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:27 No.16802584
    rolled 40 = 40

    >>16802463
    BLORP
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:28 No.16802590
    rolled 28 = 28

    >>16802584
    GLEEP
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:28 No.16802595
         File1320118137.gif-(834 KB, 344x203, brainsplosion.gif)
    834 KB
    rolled 29 = 29

    >>16802584
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:29 No.16802599
    rolled 15 = 15

    >>16802590
    HURP
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:29 No.16802601
    rolled 34 = 34

    >>16802463

    Find the largest cavern in the meteorite and make it our throne room and shrine to the ancients. We must plant trees here until we have an entire grove filled with the with lush trees and shining crystals.

    This serves a duel purposes. We shall hold all important meetings here so we don't spend our time running around and we have a place where the populace can worship the ancients(which they will be forced to do).
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:31 No.16802622
    rolled 22 = 22

    >>16802561
    Shouldn't that be ::::)
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:32 No.16802628
    rolled 18 = 18

    as i see it our primary concerns are
    scout the wold folk settlement (covered)
    read those books
    talk to 17 about armor weapons and shit
    get the materials (we said we relay should have used) and raise Aazz
    plant trees in our meteor (after 17 looks at/for meteor metal)
    train our warriors (covered)
    diplomacy "our" Woodfolk (done we can learn more later)
    Upgrade BeaRex both with necromancy and planting plants on him as living armor/tenticals.
    We can also use the same basic way we caught the meteor coupled with how we move roots and vines to turn the meteor into a moving city.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:32 No.16802633
    rolled 20 = 20

    >>16802601
    We force nothing on nobody, you git. We are the GUARDIAN OF THE EARTH. Other than that, some of what he says is agreeable, but we don't even know what the Ancients are yet, so we can make no temple to them.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:34 No.16802650
    rolled 1 = 1

    >>16802628
    Sounds acceptable. Seconded.
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/31/11(Mon)23:34 No.16802652
    >>16802601
    >>16802494
    You flit around the cavern and quickly pinpoint the largest chamber there; once that's done, you flit back to the scouts and tell them to start planting trees in there, ASAP.

    They'll probably finish in about a day or so, at which point you can Biomancy them all up. Soon, Sunfang Meteor... soon.

    And then you decide to experiment with something that's always piqued your curiosity: CAN you turn plants to meat? You go outside, stare up at some trees, thrash your whipcrack tail, and exert your energy-

    SHIT SHIT JESUS HOLY FUCK IT'S A PILLAR OF TWISTED FLESH BUT IT'S FOUNTAIN BLOOD EVERYWHERE AND IT'S GROWING EYES AND A MOUTH AND IT'S SHRIEKING LIKE THE DAMNED OH GOD WHYYYYYYY

    - you turn it back and resolve not to try that again until you can control your Biomancy just a LITTLE bit better.

    (continued)
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:37 No.16802682
    rolled 36 = 36

    >>16802633

    We know of the ancients, and the nature of those all-mighty beings. The ancients speak to us and tell us their desires and as children of the old ones we shall obey. We shall not rest until we make their dreams a reality.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:38 No.16802695
    rolled 26 = 26

    >>16802652
    We can make Shoggoths? COOL! Now we just have to turn them amorphous and figure out how to control them, and we're golden on that front.

    Oh. Hold on. If we can turn plants into meat, and we're thinking about making Bearrex a better avatar of our will by covering his bones in plant matter...

    Then doesn't that mean that, when our will is WRATH, we can convert that plant matter to SCREAMING HORROR DEATH MEAT around Bearrex?
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:39 No.16802702
    rolled 32 = 32

    >>16802652
    Wait, we're not even going to taste the flesh trees before we abandon the idea?
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:40 No.16802711
    rolled 28 = 28

    >>16802652
    I think we should keep it. a testament to our godly power, and a warning to those that oppose us.
    >> Milo 10/31/11(Mon)23:40 No.16802714
    rolled 2 = 2

    >>16802702
    A meal that screams while you eat it is probably bad for morale, primitive lizard people or no.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:42 No.16802738
    rolled 2 = 2

    >>16802652
    We should fly out to the elf city and turn all their trees into screaming flesh pillars.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:43 No.16802740
    rolled 10 = 10

    >>16802714
    We have calming aura, they can cope with it.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:48 No.16802787
    rolled 13 = 13

    Would a screaming tree provide more nutrients than an animal plus a fruit/vegetable? If it doesn't, then there's no reason to make more for us (yet).
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/31/11(Mon)23:48 No.16802789
    >>16802652
    Half to take your mind off of that incident and half because you're honestly curious, you go over to visit Seventeen.

    >>16800905
    >BONUS!

    ... who is capering around a small primitive forge, burbling and cheering and generally acting like he's just won the lottery.

    "Guardian! Guardian! I have worth! Discovery! Great ability! Rare! Rare! Oh, is happiness!"

    You call Aazz to help you translate- the wraith rises sinisterly out of the ground, but even that doesn't put a damper on Seventeen's spirits.

    >BLORP?

    "Oh, weapons and armor? Weapons and armor done! Have many iron spears! Some iron armor. Not much. Good helmets, good armor. But better news! Better news!"

    >BLORP?

    In response, Seventeen slides over and snakes a green liquidy pseudopod out from his shell, setting a breastplate against the wall. The breastplate has a VERY large hole punched through it. And then he walks over clear to the other side of the room.

    "Look! Watch!"

    The forgeslug tosses a piece of ore into his mouth, chews for a second- a small jet of steam escapes one of the box-shell's seams- and then he spits, hitting the broken armor dead-on...

    ... and the hole is patched up.

    "Fast repair! So-so quality! But better than nothing, in fight! And things break lots in fight! Patch dents, everything!"

    Aazz is staring at the armor, his eyes wide. "Tell me, Seventeen... you can do that to fuckin' weapons, right?"

    "Yes!"

    "And the faces of your fuckin' enemies, too?"

    "Yes! ... would hurt them quite badly, though."

    Seventeen is completely and utterly confused when Aazz starts laughing and slapping the forgeslug's box-shell in approval. "Damn straight it would!"

    (continued)
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/31/11(Mon)23:50 No.16802803
    >>16802787
    >>16802714
    >>16802702
    Biomancy'd meat tastes pretty bad.

    Comparing it to what we've been eating all through the quest, it would be like going from steak to tofu that is mimicking the qualities of Spam.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:52 No.16802824
    Alright, that's it, we are going to need to recruit the rest of seventeen's people even if it kills us.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:54 No.16802841
    rolled 35 = 35

    >>16802824
    We are going to form a multicultural Coalition of like-minded forest dwellers.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:56 No.16802858
    rolled 40 = 40

    >>16802824

    Maybe.

    Or we could biomancy random animals into beings like Seventeen, but larger and more easily controlled. Bio-cannons.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:56 No.16802864
    rolled 29 = 29

    >>16802824
    Dude. We have an entire extinction-event-meteor's worth of ore from SPACE. All we need is to send word that we want to forge an alliance with the Forgeslugs, so we can share left and right, and we'll be set on that front.

    More pressing... What about the other Sunfangs? Where are they? The only tribe left was this one, but surely there are still scattered pockets. Surely there are some in slavery to the Woodfolk.

    We need to find these people and bring them under our banner.
    >> Milo 10/31/11(Mon)23:56 No.16802867
    rolled 17 = 17

    >>16802858
    This idea has the dice gods' favor.
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 10/31/11(Mon)23:57 No.16802869
    >>16802789
    Soon enough, though, the scouts from the Northwestern Woodfolk Pit return: the woodfolk have DEFINITELY received word of their king's death and defeat, judging that they're starting to shore up their defenses.

    There are huts all around the large pit, but the large two-story hut- the overseer's hut? Something else?- seems to be the center of all the activity that's taking place right now. The scouts also saw a few warbands preparing to mobilize, though they couldn't get close enough to tell WHAT they were planning.

    You need to do SOMETHING vis-a-vis this village, though. What do you do?

    >COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:57 No.16802870
    rolled 5 = 5

    >>16802858
    >>16802858
    >>16802858
    >>16802858
    >>16802858


    This is the will of the ancient ones!
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:58 No.16802877
    rolled 26 = 26

    >>16802869

    We need to stage an assault ASAP. In the next few hours we need to be marching to burn that fucking place down.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:59 No.16802885
    rolled 2 = 2

    >>16802869
    I say we mobilize to hit them before they can finish preparations for whatever it is they're planning.
    >> Anonymous 10/31/11(Mon)23:59 No.16802886
    rolled 1 = 1

    move everyone who is not immediately coming with us into the meteor it will be safer there
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:00 No.16802893
    rolled 26 = 26

    >>16802869
    First, we biomancy some screaming meat-trees around the village, then we descend upon them and slaughter all that we see.

    This time there shall be no mercy. They have shown us that they will not be reasoned with.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:00 No.16802896
    rolled 13 = 13

    >>16802869

    Ask Seventeen for directions to his people, so we may send ambassadors there. We wish to forge an alliance.

    Also send a few of our more stealthy scouts to search for pockets of Sunfang, to extend our boney claw of allegiance to.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:00 No.16802899
    rolled 23 = 23

    >>16802869
    I ask a question before I determine my action, OP.

    Tell me. How much foliage does the pit have? Even mere moss?
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:01 No.16802902
    rolled 10 = 10

    >>16802858
    >>16802858
    >>16802858
    >>16802858

    We should get a bonus for this.
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 11/01/11(Tue)00:01 No.16802903
         File1320120069.jpg-(99 KB, 490x327, 1319493319956.jpg)
    99 KB
    >>16802870
    >>16802858
    WHAT

    HOW DO I EVEN-

    WHY
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:02 No.16802914
    rolled 31 = 31

    >>16802903

    Heh.
    >> Milo 11/01/11(Tue)00:02 No.16802916
    rolled 5 = 5

    >>16802869
    Have our Sunfangs ambush the raiding parties one by one as the exit the enemy Pit. Killing/caputring them means fewere reinforcements later, terror spread to the Pit, and potential sources of intelligence. Have our non-comabatants build some defences around our encampment just in case and bring the Elves into the fold.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:04 No.16802940
         File1320120294.jpg-(477 KB, 3000x2000, Blorp3 copy.jpg)
    477 KB
    rolled 34 = 34

    >>16802584
    >>16802311
    >>16802124
    >>16802099
    >>16802075
    >>16802071
    >>16801494

    Sweet outer lords. That is a ridiculous number of natural forties. In honor of this retardedly low probability of a statistical outcome, I present this token of drawfaggin'. May the dice lords smile upon the sacrifice of me actually getting any real work done and continue granting us their boon/trolling the fuck out of us.
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 11/01/11(Tue)00:05 No.16802944
    >>16802899
    The woodfolk clearcut most of the area around the pit; there are a few stray trees left standing, however.

    >>16802864
    There are likely a number of scattered Sunfang families or small group around, but they're small enough that they're hard to find- without any action taken, recruits will randomly wander in from the wilds at certain points (like the beginning of this thread).

    The woodfolk likely have a number of Sunfang slaves, but nowhere that the scouts have seen them.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:06 No.16802955
         File1320120414.jpg-(27 KB, 264x351, 1286094251376.jpg)
    27 KB
    rolled 23 = 23

    >>16802940

    It is glorious. The ancients are pleased with you.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:07 No.16802963
    >>16802944
    Ask our woodfolks about the sunfangs slaves
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:11 No.16802998
    rolled 16 = 16

    >>16802893
    Oh, we'll reason with the elves slave-caste. Fuck the higher ups, though.
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 11/01/11(Tue)00:12 No.16803001
         File1320120730.jpg-(196 KB, 900x600, 1266144431173.jpg)
    196 KB
    >>16802940
    ... holy shit

    I don't think we can call our protagonist a 'salamander anymore

    That is some fucking amazing HOLY SHIT THAT THING IS STILL TERRIFYING
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:12 No.16803011
    rolled 21 = 21

    >>16802944
    Then it's clear what we should do. When we assault the Woodfolk, we will do it in a non-conventional manner. We will first preach our word of peace and understanding to the Woodfolk from on high; call out to them to throw off their shackles and come to the Sunfang Meteor. And though we offer this boon upon them now, great horrors will be visited upon them if they do not leave the great pits and overthrow their masters. The offer will not be closed, but the horrors may... COMPLICATE things for those who are slow to make their judgement. Then, regardless of whether the majority of the woodfang rebel and leave, leaving just the military and crystal-favored, or if they chose to stay out of greater fear for their masters, we visit utter horror upon them by turning the trees into shoggoths and seeding the barren but more than likely still fertile soil with maddening fleshplants. And if the elves won't surrender and join us, flipping off their tyrannical masters, when their hellish pit has been made a literal hell, then NOTHING will and we'll just have to emancipate them by simple brute force, whittling down their military with guerilla warfare and our various new toys.

    Whatcha think, BLORP, anons? Sound like a plan?
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:14 No.16803024
    rolled 31 = 31

    >>16803011
    We could fly overhead, spitting out our new remote translators and urge the elev into rebellion.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:16 No.16803034
    rolled 34 = 34

    >>16802893
    Anon. You'd make us just as horrible as the Woodfolk by doing that. There is always room for mercy and understanding. There is a reason that we have a calming aura; we're a chill motherfucker of a salamander demigod, a benevolent one. We do not mercilessly slaughter. We will sweep aside those who stand against us, but all who wish to join us must be taken in with open arms, and those who stand neither with or against us treated just as fairly and benevolently as those who stand with us, that they might change their viewpoint to favor us.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:16 No.16803037
    rolled 28 = 28

    >>16803011

    That sounds horrifying. I love it.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:17 No.16803046
    rolled 35 = 35

    >>16803011
    the only problem is how do we project the sound in an understandable form AND our own grand BLORP
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:17 No.16803056
    rolled 36 = 36

    >>16803034
    >You'd make us just as horrible as the Woodfolk by doing that

    Incase you haven't realized it, but we're already far far worse than the woodfolk.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:18 No.16803064
    rolled 1 = 1

    >>16802869

    We go in an murder everyone.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:18 No.16803066
    rolled 32 = 32

    >>16803046

    We evolve the launchable parasites to have a speaker capability, partly psionic to get actual words in, partly sound to get blorps in.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:19 No.16803069
    rolled 17 = 17

    >>16803056
    How. We aren't assholes or douchbags. We don't have a slave caste. We seem ti actually care for our people. What am I missing?
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 11/01/11(Tue)00:20 No.16803081
    Okay, stopping the voting here!
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:21 No.16803083
    rolled 30 = 30

    >>16803069

    I'd think he meant the horrible tree thing we made.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:21 No.16803089
    rolled 5 = 5

    >>16803069

    The fact we're a vicious monster on a warpath, ready to maim and kill anyone who doesn't do what we say and/or looks delicious.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:24 No.16803111
    rolled 6 = 6

    >>16803083
    >>16803089
    Oh, that thing probably couldn't even think. And the assholes we're on the warpath against have it coming for bring assholes.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:24 No.16803112
    rolled 31 = 31

    >>16803083
    but that did int hurt a person and im not certain it could feel pain though that is very much open to question what with the screaming.
    Just because we can do horrible things doesn't make us horrible
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:24 No.16803118
    rolled 38 = 38

    >>16803046
    We carry Razz along with us, of course. He's our Godspeaker don't you know. Temporary bit of biomancy to make him shout especially loud for good measure, and talk in unison.

    >>16803056
    We're a demigod of death and life, of the natural order, of zen. Though in battle we represent the most brutal side of nature, that is not all we are. We represent a people which has been oppressed and murdered and ruined by the tyrants of the woodfolk... And the woodfolk suffer just the same. It is our duty to help them as a chill benevolent motherfucker of a salanander demigod. And we NEED more followers to face the world ahead of us.

    >>16803089
    Only in response to Woodfolk tyrants who would've done the same to us. Even though we may be a terrifying predator, we must nonetheless stay our hand. The Woodfolk are far more useful to us alive, grateful and ready to serve, than as an afternoon snack.
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 11/01/11(Tue)00:25 No.16803128
    >>16803034
    >>16803024
    >>16803011
    >>16802893
    >>16802877
    ... right. That DOES sound about as good a plan as any.

    "ALRIGHT, YOU FUCKERS!" Aazz roars, his ghostly voice carrying far enough to be heard around the meteor. "LET'S FUCKING DO THIS!"

    You all quickly round up your troops- the clubbers, the spearmen, the leafdancers, and all of your more notable minions- and start marching as fast as you can; it's go time. And you THINK you have a plan that will, at the very least, give the common woodfolk a chance to get out from the middle of this battle.

    ... even if it WILL involve screaming trees.

    You have one more task in front of you, however...

    __________________________
    SQUADRON LEADERS
    1) Aazz (Wraith, Clubber)
    2) Razz (Leafdancer)
    3) Seventeen (Forgeslug, Repair, Ranged Support)
    4) Bearex (GROAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR)

    TROOPS:
    - 28 Clubbers
    - 13 Spearmen (Dragoon Mode)
    - 5 Leafdancers
    __________________________

    >COMMAND!
    Who will you have leading who? How will you arrange your troops?
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:25 No.16803131
    rolled 10 = 10

    >>16803118
    >Only in response to Woodfolk tyrants who would've done the same to us

    We were already indiscirminatly killing woodfolk because we were hungry long before we knew anything about the wood folk or the sunfangs and their plight.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:27 No.16803142
    rolled 39 = 39

    i Think we should also upgrade BeaRex with plant armor and more bones before we head out to give our offer of piece and warning of war.
    Also if BeaRex gets injured can we use necromancy and or life magic to heal him?
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:29 No.16803167
    rolled 40 = 40

    >>16803128

    Aazz leads 15 clubbers and 5 spearmen, clubbers infront of the spearmen at the beginning of the charge. Razz and Seventeen leads the leafdancers and 10 clubbers as a ranged support group. Bearex leads the remaining troops. We do what our plan was.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:30 No.16803177
    rolled 15 = 15

    >>16803128
    Let's put Aazz with the clubbers, Razz and Seventeen with the leafdancers, and have bearrex smash shit wherever it seems like he's needed most.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:32 No.16803196
    rolled 5 = 5

    >>16803128

    We're going to seperate our forces into two groups, assault groups(who do the actual charging and attacking) and support groups (who assist the assault group using disruption or healing).

    The first group be composed of the 28 clubbers and lead by Aazz. They will be the ones who charge the enemy first. They won't charge, however, until the rest of the forces are in position.

    The second main assault group, squad Death Iron, will be lead by the dragoons and bearex. They're going to immediately attack once the battle has been started by the first assault group. They're going to act as the spear thrust that attacks the most powerful enemy warriors. They're going to lead the way for our attack on the enemy crystal-users.

    The Support groups will consist of the leafdancers and Razz and forgeslug. They will assist any way they can, usually keeping our troops in the battle and making sure the enemy troops are off guard.

    We are going to be in the fight from the start. Our warriors need to see us fighting. We're going to be fighting alongside the first assault gruop. Once Death Iron clears the way for us we're going to attack the enemy leaders.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:32 No.16803198
    rolled 3 = 3

    >>16803128
    Aazz, obviously, leads the army as its general, as well as being a kickass wraith with a suped-up version of the King's Club.

    Spearmen recieve a charge on the defense, or harass and stab and be jumpy gits on the offense. Clubbers do what they do best; club the hell out of pansy ass Woodfolk soldiers.

    Seventeen sprays charging woodfolk with molten metal, obviously. The repair is an interesting utility, but he should really focus on melting woodfolk.

    Bearex... Does what Bearex does best. GRRRROOOOAAAAAAAARRRRRRR! indeed.

    Meanwhile, we wreak havoc with the fleshtrees and our magics and our simple bestial might.

    >>16803131
    We also indiscriminately killed Sunfang. Including the Chieftain's son. We were but an animal back then. We are not now. Speaking of which, we should really apologize to the Chief for murdering his son like we did.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:33 No.16803199
    >>16803142
    >>16803167

    What the fuck.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:33 No.16803200
    >>16803167

    Goddamn, that's my 3rd 40 this thread. Thanks Dice Gods!
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:35 No.16803226
    rolled 9 = 9

    >>16803198
    > We were but an animal back then. We are not now.

    You're right, animals are natural creatures. We're a horribly mutated salamander that lusts for death . We're definitely considered a Mythical beast now.

    > we should really apologize to the Chief for murdering his son like we did.

    No, we shouldn't because we're a giant salamander, not a giant pussy.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:36 No.16803242
    rolled 15 = 15

    17 should go with 3 leaf dancers and the clubbers
    Razz comes with us to make our announcement(we should practice an amplify his voice) then go joun the spear men and Aazz.
    the other two leaf dancers go with BearRex if possible/safer than on foot riding him so that he prefers them protection and they offer ranged support
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:38 No.16803256
    rolled 14 = 14

    >>16803226
    We're Salamander Kamina. Kamina wouldn't commit such atrocities. Neither shall we.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:39 No.16803272
    rolled 27 = 27

    >>16803256
    >>16803256
    >We're Salamander Kamina. Kamina wouldn't commit such atrocities. Neither shall we.

    Yeah well we're going to continue to commit atrocities, along with the ones we've already committed, because no matter what you "think"we are our actions show what we are.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:41 No.16803293
    rolled 28 = 28

    >>16803272
    I choose to believe in the salamander who believes in me who believes in him.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:41 No.16803298
    rolled 15 = 15

    >>16803272
    Man, why are you so insistent on us being the bad guy?
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:41 No.16803299
    rolled 24 = 24

    >>16803293

    Cool story, bro.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:42 No.16803309
    rolled 14 = 14

    >>16803298
    Because that's what we are, and that's what we've been doing. You're the one who's trying to act out of character.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:44 No.16803323
    rolled 31 = 31

    >>16803198
    you are right about the whole apology thing if we succeed in raising him (we should ask if he wants us to just to be sure) after the fight we should relay try the same with his sun the other wood folk and those first two wold folk because the ass hole wold folk hated them so they are probably ok.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:45 No.16803336
    rolled 6 = 6

    >>16803309
    Yes, helping this oppressed people, freeing a slave holders entourage instead of noming them, Not eating the adorable shellfish.

    Oh yes, I agree. We are a COMPLETE monster.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:46 No.16803351
    rolled 9 = 9

    >>16803336

    Right, because a few out of sync actions suddenly means we're a saint. You haven't been following EVOquest if you think we're the good guys.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:46 No.16803352
    >>16803309

    Killed the chieftain of the Sunfangs, but we've been leading them to a better life so far AND we brought them back to life. Killed the emissary of the Woodfolk nobles, but let the Woodfolk slaves live in relative peace so far. Ate random creatures to evolve at the beginning, stopped eating random creatures because it wasn't doing it for us anymore. Going to war to expand lands and provide peace for our own people, not killing the commoners. Overall, more good than evil.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:47 No.16803364
    >>16803352

    And by "brought them back to life" I meant bringing the chieftain back as a wraith. That's as good, maybe even better.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:49 No.16803378
    rolled 9 = 9

    >>16803351
    Yes I agree, the things we did back when we we're a mindless animal are still totally relevant in light of our character development.

    Are you sure you've been reading?
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:50 No.16803386
         File1320123013.jpg-(225 KB, 1908x1308, Seventeenbeinguseful copy.jpg)
    225 KB
    rolled 33 = 33

    >>16802789

    Why?

    Because 'Daw. That's why.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:52 No.16803400
    rolled 23 = 23

    >>16803386
    We've got to recruit his whole people.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:55 No.16803415
    rolled 4 = 4

    >>16803351
    We are who we choose to be. We've evolved from a simple animal, became primal and deadly, and now we're becoming more benevolent and less concerned with eating everything.

    The vast majority of us don't really want to be stupidly evil, and at least on or two other posters aside from myself are actively voicing their displeasure at the idea. If anything, slaughtering those woodfolk- after we granted them mercy before, and before that seeded the idea way back that we try to press them into an armistice instead of destroying them entirely- would be a far greater break in character than our steady ramp up into benevolence.

    So please. Quit being a git. We're eating up posts, here. You're almost as bad as Khornefag from Heretic Quest. Actually, you're possibly just as bad.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:56 No.16803428
    rolled 20 = 20

    we were a dumb brutal animal we grew out of it god hood can do that to you. You know when you have people that depend on you.
    We are brutal but we also we show restraint we only do brutal things to enemy combatants.
    We are at worst neutral though i see his point i like the yin yang analogy
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)00:58 No.16803444
    rolled 9 = 9

    >>16803378
    >Yes I agree, the things we did back when we we're a mindless animal

    We've been doing 'those things" in every single quest thread, including this one. Your "mindless animal" statement really no better than the "no true scotsman" informal logical fallacy. No matter how much you try to make excuses for our previous actions the fact remains everything was done out of bloodlust.

    Really it's laughable at your pathetic excuses. Trying to invalidate ones actions because they were done at hte start of the thread is utterly ridiculous and really shows that you're not in-touch with what's happened in this quest.
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 11/01/11(Tue)01:02 No.16803475
    >>16803142
    Compared to some of the shit that you HAVE been doing with Biomancy and Necromancy, giving Bearex extra armor is EXTRAORDINARILY easy: you wrap his bones with vines molded so as to give him a little defense without impairing his mobility, and then layer some tree and/or bone armor on top.

    You also manage to meld the bear skull a bitchin' helmet out of bone.

    >>16803167
    The squads are laid out just as planned, and you feel fairly confident about how they'll be led; Aazz and his melee fighters will be a bull in a china shop, Razz is a fair hand with his leafdancers and while Seventeen isn't particularly experienced, he can keep his armored clubbers in tip-top shape...

    ... and Bearex is Bearex, so his troops are pretty damn pumped just to fight next to such a titan.

    And now to see how this all works.

    (continued)
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:02 No.16803480
    Why does it matter what we are?
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 11/01/11(Tue)01:03 No.16803493
    >>16803475
    At the Northwestern Woodfolk Pit:

    The first thing the woodfolk see is Bearex standing at the forest's edge, his eyes lit by a swirling green fire.

    That would have been MORE than enough to send them into a tizzy... but then, the vanguard of the Sunfang Army moves into view, and they have *no fucking clue what to do.* You and Aazz, standing in Bearex's mouth, start... well.

    "- ght, can they hear me NOW? Fucking long way for sound to travel, I mean, even if I'm a goddamn GHOST, they should- oh, right."

    Even those woodfolk toiling away in the pit with pick and shovel can hear the proceedings now. The former-chieftain-current-wraith clears his throat.

    "Alright, you piss-shitting woodfolk! Listen up! We got a little proposition for you: we ARE still pretty fucking sore about getting chased out of the forest, but we think this's gonna be a great deal for you."

    Aazz continues even as the woodfolk murmur to themselves (mostly along the lines of "good gracious, what DOES 'piss-shitting' mean?"). "We're here for the fucking crystal-favored! You know, the guys who threw you into a great goddamned pit and started taking everything you've ever worked for? Yeah, those guys."

    (continued)
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:04 No.16803501
    rolled 33 = 33

    >>16803415
    >The vast majority of us don't really want to be stupidly evil, and at least on or two other posters aside from myself are actively voicing their displeasure at the idea.

    You act as if I can't simply go back and re-read the previous quest threads to verify your statement, which is an obvious lie. The group conscious was always on violent actions, from the very begining of the quest to the last quest thread. I really don't know how you possibly thought you might convince anyone otherwise with the proof to the contrary is in the original post link.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:04 No.16803502
    rolled 18 = 18

    >>16803444
    Sir. Look to OP's last post before the current one. We're already not engaging in a slaughter of noncombatants and we're already going to accept all who come to us. Our character's mindset is clearly inclined towards self-control of our domains of death and war when it can be done. At the very least, you've been outvoted by threadgoers and we won't be engaging in any atrocities any time soon, because we would all like some relative consistency in the character with how it grows from where it is now. Quit your gittery. This quest does NOT need a Khornefag.
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 11/01/11(Tue)01:05 No.16803510
    >>16803493
    "So here's what we propose," Aazz continues, raising his voice above the rising din; woodfolk are yelling back and forth, some against the crystal-favored, and some in support of their 'god's prophets.' You can't tell how the numbers are split. "If you guys wanna run, that's fine with us. If you guys wanna run to US, we'll welcome you with open fucking arms, 'cause that's how our Guardian rolls. We even got some woodfolk with us! Say hi to the nice slaves, guys."

    There are a few scattered "hi"s from the woodfolk in your employ, though it's hard to hear.

    "If you guys wanna STAY, though, that's gonna be a little harder, 'cause you're gonna be stuck in the freakiest goddamn hell you've ever seen. Right? Right. Oh, and no matter what- the offer's going to be open."

    Aazz lets the silence hang for a few moments, before- "Alright, Guardian, lay it on them."

    You concentrate. Immediately, one of the few trees on the edge of the pit suddenly turns into a pulsating, writhing pillar of flesh that's fountaining blood, guts, and gore everywhere; horrified screams erupt from the general populace, and you hear even more as you repeat this with a few more of the trees.

    For those woodfolk who CAN run, there IS a general panicked exodus AWAY from most of this, though you can't tell exactly which direction it's going in, not quite yet-

    -- and that's all you have time to do before the woodfolk warbands catch up to you. Again, it's a mix of club-wielders and spearmen; this time, though, it's a MUCH more straightforward engagement, and Aazz and Bearex's squadrons crash into the woodfolks' front lines with a will (and equally loud roars)-

    - and you are flying up above, peering down at the melee that's just starting to unfold. Razz and Seventeen's squadron has yet to engage; Aazz and Bearex's clubbers are laying into the WOODFOLK clubbers, while your spearmen seem to melt back into the trees, getting ready to start their acrobatics.

    >COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:06 No.16803519
    >>16803501
    Isn't this EVO quest? We evolved past base violence and bloodlust.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:06 No.16803522
    rolled 37 = 37

    >>16803480

    It really doesn't, just a few asspies are insanely butthurt that the entire quest thread is moving in a direction that they don't like and can do nothing about.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:08 No.16803543
    rolled 2 = 2

    >>16803444
    spit your mouthook babies into the fray to attach to the woodfolk and distract the fuck out of them.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:09 No.16803549
    rolled 17 = 17

    >>16803510
    Take potshots with our launchable parasites while we keep a lookout for the crystal-favored. Wouldn't want that asshole sneaking up on our troops.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:09 No.16803556
    rolled 40 = 40

    >>16803510

    Use calming aura on the enemy warriors to make them easier prey for our clubbers, and use our biomancy powers attack the woodfolk with razor-leaves.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:10 No.16803562
    rolled 4 = 4

    >>16803510
    Make dive bomb attacks with your tail, but stay in the air in case something comes up.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:10 No.16803563
    rolled 15 = 15

    >>16803510
    Strafe the Woodfolk troops from the skies with claws and teeth and webbing. Keep an eye out for crystal-favored gits.

    >>16803522
    ... Except by voting to the contrary? In greater numbers and with better rolls?
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:11 No.16803571
    What are the Woodfolk even working on in the pit? Gathering moss, making the pit larger, or just hauling stuff around?
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:12 No.16803574
    rolled 29 = 29

    >>16803556
    >>16803549
    both of these
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:12 No.16803581
    rolled 35 = 35

    >>16803563
    >In greater numbers

    I'll give you that, there are less of the original questers today than previous days, which accounts for our dip in bloodthirstiness. It will most likely stabilize tomorrow, however.

    >Better rolls

    Well we'll see how well that works out.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:13 No.16803588
    >>16803556
    Ok seriously, this is the third time *in a row* that the guy immediately after me nat 40'd This is getting pretty fucking weird.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:14 No.16803600
    >>16803581

    I've been here since day one, just going with the flow like a chill salamander.
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 11/01/11(Tue)01:16 No.16803613
    >>16803571
    ... I'm... honestly not sure if anyone ASKED this question before.

    But general information gathering would have come up with "for ore."
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:16 No.16803617
    >>16803588
    Your like a dream-catcher, except instead of catching nightmares, you catch bad luck.

    What I'm saying is, be careful on your way to bed, lest a plane fall on you.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:17 No.16803625
    >>16803613

    That sounds reasonable, was just wondering if this was just Woodfolk being retarded in a pit.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:18 No.16803633
    >>16803581
    I am one of the original questers.I just recognize what would make a better plot that "Monster salamander eats everything, poops, herps."
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:21 No.16803667
    >>16803613

    Since it's ore, that could mean there are veins of metal that can produce the main materials in bronze, namely tin and copper. That also means we have most of the ingredients for other fine products such as pewter. Which would be good if we ever needed to trade.

    The more you know, brought to you by dwarf fortress play.
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 11/01/11(Tue)01:26 No.16803714
    >>16803556
    >>16803549
    Oh, were you ever waiting for this.

    With an angry BLORP, you fold your wings and do a quick strafing run over the woodfolk clubbers, unleashing your calming aura with all the subtlety of a sledgehammer. With how strong your aura is, it's an instant hit; the lead woodfolk collapse, the ones behind are either stunned or stumble, and you even manage to tag a few of the spearmen coming up behind them.

    Your clubbers, with their new armor and weapons, take full advantage of this and start smashing them into the ground; the dragoons pick off those who try to retreat, and you even see one vault up into the air before coming down, HARD, on an unfortunate woodfolk spearman who couldn't get out of the way in time.

    And Aazz... Aazz is having the time of his (un)life, swinging his club in huge arcs, in time with spectral roars to the tune of "IIIIIII FUUUUUUUUCKED YOOOOOOOOUR MOOOOOOOOM"; those who are hit straight on simply explode, while those who are winged seem to be chilled, moving more slowly than before. And Bearex- good old Bearex- is right next to him, pulling off the only two attacks he ever needs: 1) kick, and 2) bite.

    Woodfolk go FLYING.

    With a thought, you create razor leaves in the nearest trees, but have no way to move them-

    - until Razz catches onto what you're trying to do. "LEAFDANCERS! GO!" he roars, taking full advantage of the chance you've given him. The whirlwind of leaves don't cut through armor, but since most of the woodfolk lack neck protection or have their faces unobscured...

    You stare a bit. It's like they're getting consumed by invisible piranha.

    (continued)
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 11/01/11(Tue)01:32 No.16803761
    >>16803714
    Your army SEEMS to have things under control; the other army is slightly better trained, and they have more woodfolk, but they just do NOT have the sheer firepower that your own squad leaders are pulling out. It's really true- King Selac took all of his best with him when he went to fight you at your home turf.

    Besides... this time, you have iron weapons. Even nicks from these are enough to cause some of the woodfolk to stagger, flinch, or even shriek, taking them off-guard long enough for them to lose focus. Hell, even SEVENTEEN is putting up a good fight; the forgeslug is alternating between spitting molten metal at enemies' faces, and marginally LESS molten metal at the sunfang clubbers whose armor is taking hits.

    They've got it under control, at least for the moment, so it's time to look for the crystal-favorTHERE SHE IS.

    The woodfolk in question is standing on the roof of the second-story overseer's building, watching the fight with the same bird's-eye view that you do; when your eyes meet, you can FEEL the power she possesses.

    What's worrisome is that she 1) smiles, and 2) snaps her fingers. The sound seems to ring out across the whole of the pit...

    (continued)
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 11/01/11(Tue)01:41 No.16803835
         File1320126077.jpg-(127 KB, 1500x1257, Yeti.jpg)
    127 KB
    >>16803761
    ... and what answers is an earth-shaking roar, the sounds of chains breaking, and you catch a mere glimpse of SOMETHING large, white, and ape-like vaulting straight out of the pit- before it seems to disappear in midair.

    There's a titanic BOOM, and you see a small crater form right next to your troops- and then an invisible force slams straight into the sunfolk clubbers, sending a few of them flying across the battlefield. The monster flickers back into view, and-

    ... it seems like it WAS a crystal-favored once. You feel an echo of the power this ape-like monster once held, but all that's left behind those mad red eyes is a dull, animal-like mind, even less intelligent than the bear and the bird you fought.

    With a roar, Bearex enters the fray, body-slamming the Yeti away from the army- but the Yeti immediately goes invisible, and your skeletal champion is rocked as an unseen force starts punching him.

    Fucking hell- you whirl as you try to find the woodfolk-crystal-favored, and you see her walking down the roof and back into the hut, turning her back on the battle.

    You need to decide who to go after... and what to do.

    >COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:44 No.16803854
    >>16803835
    Help rex. It's no good taking that bitch if your bros die while you do it. The next time that think shows up, attach one of your mouth things to it so you can track it.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:44 No.16803855
    rolled 9 = 9

    >>16803835
    I ask a simple question. What is the Woodfolk overseer's hut, made out of?
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:45 No.16803862
    rolled 26 = 26

    >>16803854
    Rolling
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:45 No.16803867
    rolled 23 = 23

    One simple rule:
    BROS BEFORE HOS
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:45 No.16803868
    rolled 38 = 38

    >>16803835
    I don't really want that elf bitch to get away, but we're the only one that can sense that yeti asshole when he's invisible. Let's use our biomancy to lock down his feet and do a fly-by to slash his eyes out.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:45 No.16803869
    rolled 9 = 9

    >>16803835

    The yeti is an immediate threat. One way to deal with this is to send vines flying everywhere above and around your soldiers, in an attempt to grab hold of the creature. Once he is held, it will be a simple matter to biomancy his brain out his ears. Or necromancy his skull inside-out. Or maybe both.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:45 No.16803871
    rolled 24 = 24

    Tell the leaf dancers to create a cloud of leaves around the yeti to help show where it is while you hit it head on with a calming burst and then go after the crystal-favored
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:46 No.16803877
    >>16803835

    We need to use calming aura on the beast, then when he is disorientated we fly in and try and finish him with biomancy. Hopping on his head and fucking up his brain to get him out of the fight quickly is ideal.
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 11/01/11(Tue)01:46 No.16803880
    >>16803855
    Mud and stone.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:46 No.16803885
    rolled 1 = 1

    >>16803877
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:48 No.16803892
    rolled 38 = 38

    >>16803880
    Is there any significant organic mass?

    ... Like, y'know. Bacteria in the mud... Moss in the stone... Critters in the walls...

    I think you see where I'm going with this, yes?
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:49 No.16803911
    rolled 38 = 38

    I wonder if this beast is a warning that evolving too much might cause us to lose our brains. Or that we should evolve more brains.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:51 No.16803922
    >>16803911
    What if we evolve flying brains that shoot death beams from their eyes?
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 11/01/11(Tue)01:51 No.16803927
    >>16803892
    ... oh, that's NASTY.

    Bacteria's too small for your Biomancy to handle, there isn't enough moss (the woodfolk royalty/crystal-favored run a relatively clean ship- besides, moss is MM-MMM GOOD), and the critters... aren't NEARLY big enough to make a difference, not from this range.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:51 No.16803929
    rolled 18 = 18

    >>16803835
    Try and catch the ape in our calming aura, hopefully giving bearex a momentary advantage before flying to the crystal-favored and sinking our hooks into her.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:51 No.16803930
    rolled 24 = 24

    >>16803911
    No, this is just what happens to those that the crystals don't favor.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:52 No.16803935
    rolled 39 = 39

    >>16803922
    NO, THOGG! IS BAD IDEA GIVE FLYING DEATH RAYS BRAINS AND SEN-TEE-ANTS! YOU AM PLAY GOD!
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:52 No.16803940
    >>16803922

    That would be silly, evolving into a hive-mind would be better. One of our many selves may fall, but that just leaves the other hundred or so to deal with.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:53 No.16803947
    rolled 4 = 4

    We are auto-saging. Someone had better archive this!
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:54 No.16803950
    >>16803940
    I didn't mean us. Just in general. I want Flying Death Brains.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:55 No.16803965
    rolled 1 = 1

    >>16803929

    This.

    Give Bearex a quick advantage before charging the enemy crystal-bearer.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:55 No.16803969
    rolled 39 = 39

    >>16803927
    What if we willed the critters into merging into one horrible Thing-esque blob to go and eat (or at least scare the pants off of and severely delay) the sorceress, while we go deal with the yeti? I'd like to use my 38 for such an action, if thou wouldst not mind.

    >>16803868
    I'd like to cast my vote for this as well. Send Shoggoth meatmoss abominations to eat the Sorceress and herd the Woodfolk into running to OUR territory for sanctuary, and slap the Yeti's shit with our biomancy and horrible raptor-claws.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:56 No.16803982
    >>16803950

    If brains were meant to take flight, then why are they so weak and wingless?
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:57 No.16803989
    rolled 28 = 28

    >>16803835

    We should fly towards the yeti while it's visible, or use biomancy to trap it, and latch onto it's head with our tongue. We then eat it's brain in the name of the ancients.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:57 No.16803997
    >>16803982
    That's why we have to evolve them wings and death rays.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:59 No.16804008
    >>16803997

    Good luck finding a crystal-blessed brain that isn't inside a body yet still capable of survival then.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)01:59 No.16804011
    >>16803969

    I wish to make love to you for that crit.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)02:01 No.16804035
         File1320127296.png-(114 KB, 358x546, simo hayha.png)
    114 KB
    rolled 10 = 10

    >>16804011
    Pucker up, gorgeous.
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 11/01/11(Tue)02:03 No.16804050
    >>16803854
    >>16803868
    >>16803969
    >39
    You squint. You concentrate. And then- yes, you start seeing faint flickers of life inside the hut, even at this range. You can't do anything about the woodfolk crystal-favored, not DIRECTLY, but...

    You clench a clawed paw into a fist, and you immediately see those little flickers- those critters- flowing towards the room that the crystal-favored is in, eventually coalescing into a slightly bigger blob. And then you send it roiling towards the woodfolk.

    If THAT doesn't slow her, then you have no goddamn clue what will.

    That's as much as you can do, because you've got ANOTHER pressing matter here. That monster's going to have to learn that if it wants to fucking mess around with your champion, you're going to mess with IT.

    You start sensing it more and more as you dive closer; the second it flickers into view, you latch onto its leg and start channeling your Biomancy, slamming your mouth-hooks in to keep you connected-

    - and it takes! The Yeti is rooted into place, its fur and part of its feet meshed into the ground. It's a quick chop-job, but it'll definitely do.

    As the monster shrieks, gibbers, and howls, twisting at its feet this way and that, you dart in and slash at its eyes; it's too slow in batting at you, and the Yeti is blinded in one fell swoop.

    You alight right on top of Bearex's bear skull, your wings turning back into that ragged cape, and watch as the Yeti scrabbles at its ruined face and sways in place, barely managing to keep its balance.

    ... you can FEEL Bearex grinning. It's just you and him against this monster, almost like the old days.

    And it's just you and him who will finish this.

    >COMMAND?
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)02:05 No.16804071
    rolled 34 = 34

    http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/16800623/
    http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=blorp
    Vote it up
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)02:05 No.16804073
    rolled 20 = 20

    >>16804050
    GIGAAAAAAAAAA HOOOOOOOOOOK BREEEEEEAK!
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)02:06 No.16804082
    >>16804050
    GIGA DRILL BREAKER!
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)02:06 No.16804083
    rolled 29 = 29

    >>16804050
    BITE HIS ENTIRE HEAD. ENGULF IT. Then, have Bearex tackle his ass and seperate it neatly from his body as we take back off into the sky in the opposite direction.

    In addition, we're autosaging, sah. It's time to start a new thread or call it, and either way time to archive.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)02:06 No.16804085
    rolled 23 = 23

    >>16804050

    Go for the throat! Then leap off and check on that crystal-favored.
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 11/01/11(Tue)02:07 No.16804091
    >>16804083
    Yup, I'm ending it with the next post.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)02:08 No.16804096
    rolled 1 = 1

    >>16804050

    Use calming aura on the yeti, then attack him with biomancy.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)02:08 No.16804101
    rolled 32 = 32

    >>16804050
    RIP HIS GODDAMN SKELETON OUT!
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)02:09 No.16804103
    rolled 32 = 32

    THIS
    >>16804073
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)02:09 No.16804104
    >>16804035

    that guy... was a living avatar of awesome
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)02:10 No.16804126
    rolled 11 = 11

    >>16804050

    DO THE IMPOSSIBLE, SEE THE INVISIBLE!
    CRUSH THE UNCRUSHABLE, BREAK THE UNBREAKABLE!

    I don't know what this will do to the yeti, but I hope I roll a 40 so I can find out.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)02:16 No.16804162
    rolled 34 = 34

    The yeti is huge, that means he has huge guts. Ripe and tear!
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)02:17 No.16804176
    >>16804162

    >Highest roll
    >Rip and Tear

    I like your style friend. Have some support.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)02:18 No.16804180
    rolled 18 = 18

    >>16804176

    derp
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 11/01/11(Tue)02:18 No.16804181
    >>16804103
    >>16804101
    >>16804083
    As one, you and Bearex lunge forward; you dash forward to stand on the tip of the tyrant king's skull, while your skeletal champion hurtles at the Yeti, a calcified juggernaut with a maw of Guinsu knives. With an expert twist of your shapeshifting abilities, you open your mouth, and suddenly your mouth-hooks are growing in size...

    Your hooks, looking like some gigantic horn, dice into the Yeti's chest, cutting straight through; your Bearex's charge mashes it in further, the whole weight of the tyrant king skeleton almost flattening it on its own.

    Bearex travels a few more steps- once, twice, thrice- and then, with a twist of BOTH of your heads, the Yeti is torn messily in half, splattering both of you in its blood.

    Clearly... the Yeti never saw it coming.

    As the Bearex roars in triumph, you make a beeline right for the two-story hut, intending to chase down the woodfolk crystal-bearer- and ending it right here, right now.

    >THREAD END! TO BE CONTINUED...
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)02:18 No.16804186
    rolled 16 = 16

    we can combine all 5 of these
    >>16804162
    >>16804103
    >>16804101
    >>16804083
    >>16804073
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)02:19 No.16804189
         File1320128363.jpg-(9 KB, 308x163, andmyaxe.jpg)
    9 KB
    >>16804162

    You have my roll.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)02:20 No.16804199
    >>16804181

    Good game OP. We didn't do too much this game, but it was still very fun.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)02:21 No.16804210
    rolled 11 = 11

    this is the best quest ever.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)02:22 No.16804218
    rolled 7 = 7

    >>16804181
    when pray tell are we continuing?
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)02:22 No.16804223
    rolled 3 = 3

    >>16804181
    I Fucking love this quest.
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 11/01/11(Tue)02:23 No.16804227
    OKAY! I've got some bad news, and I've... well, okay, it's only bad news.

    This is turning out to be a pretty bad week for me, and honestly, the next week isn't looking any better- I've got a LOT of major projects due, and not enough time to do them.

    I'm not sure when I can get this quest series up and running again, but if I'm LUCKY, I'll be able to come back for a bit on Thursday. After that, it's going to be touch-and-go, at least until the 10th.

    Thanks a lot for following this quest, guys!
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)02:24 No.16804242
    >>16804227
    Any idea what time?
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)02:25 No.16804244
    rolled 32 = 32

    >>16804227

    It's a pleasure as always, good luck with real life.
    >> BLORP !!RkFQIQOO6xk 11/01/11(Tue)02:25 No.16804245
    >>16804199
    I'm glad! I'm running on not nearly enough sleep, so my typing wasn't exactly up to par tonight.

    Hopefully, my batteries will be better charged when I get back.


    >>16804227
    Whoops, sorry! The usual time: 8 pm EST or thereabouts.
    >> Anonymous 11/01/11(Tue)02:28 No.16804272
    thanks again for the epic thread



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