Basically, the way we think of elves. Weeaboos wish they were graceful and sophisticated like us, Orc /tg/ hates us.

>>18408812

>HumanJaw.jpeg

Have you seen this shit? This nigger right here got his tusks removed and his lower jaw reset so he could cosmetically look like a human! I can't even imagine how fucked up his speech must be now.

>>18408905

... that's no male ork, son.

You gonna murdered with a pair of glasses.

>>18408924
herp derp forgot pic.

>>18408970
Isn't that a modded rico from Just Cause?

I guess he can fit on a orc description

Human Racial Traits
+2 Dexterity, +2 Intelligence, +2 Charisma -2 Strength: Humans are graceful, charming, and keen of mind, but physically weak.

Medium: Humans are Medium creatures and have no bonuses or penalties due to their size.

Normal Speed: Humans have a base speed of 30 feet.

Day Vision: Human vision range is halved by dim light. They cannot see in lightless conditions. However, they gain a +2 racial bonus to Perception checks to see in daylight.

Favor of Destiny: Humans receive a +1 racial bonus on all saving throws.

Weapon Familiarity: Humans are proficient with longswords, shortspears, and longspears, and treat any weapon with the word “humanish” in its name as a martial weapon.

Languages: Humans begin play speaking Common and Humanish. Humans with high Intelligence scores can choose from the following: Celestial, Draconic, Elven, Gnoll, Gnome, Goblin, Orc, and Sylvan.

>>18409023
Two Plus Cha? Me think not. Humans have ugly pulled back skin which looks like it stretched across flesh! Which isn't even muscle!
So weird.
Fetishes keep out. Thanks Kay.

ITT pathetic humanfags

is there anything worse than a self-hating orc?

>>18409046
Dude, charisma isn't physical beauty, it's social force. And going back in all the stories, humans have always been really charming and conniving, even scary when they want to be, even though they are kind of small.

Why do we have goblins again?

>>18409087
They are kind of like...mini people, I guess. Except then we have hobgoblins and bugbears.

I think they are like evolutionary throwbacks.

>>18409087
goblins are to orcs what dwarves are to humans

>>18409104
What halflings are to humans, actually.

>>18409079

Go back to SkinAffinity humanfag.

>>18409079
The IMPORTANT ones, sure. The bulk of the humans in all the stories are faceless warriors that are inferior except for their more advanced tech.

>Orcs are living on a 21st century level
Holy shit they're all epic leveled?

>>18409117
More or less, goblins are too weedy to be like dwarves, and too book dumb to be like Gnomes.

I'm gonna post humans till yer like it!

>>18413233
Best part is how lithe dey look. Not an axe or a club in sight.

>>18413251
Even dere guns is agile-lookin'!

>>18413261

Humans?
I've been reading about humans since I was knee high. Such stupid fictional creatures. They'll go to war, but they make grand machines that create giant fiery explosions. They'll bankrupt their entire civilization and put all their money into machines and devices that they think they can use to kill better and end conflicts faster.

The human folley is that they never realize that a single guy with a rock in one hand and a stick in the other can just go out, find the other guy, and beat him to death. None of their silly politicking.

>>18413305
Ya git, you ain't remembered shit about humans. Dey make all the boom-tech ta keep from gettin' hit with sticks an' rocks.

Humans is SMART.

>>18413326
They so smart that they get dumb all over again! They can never agree when to use all that boom-tech so they end up just sitting on it!

>>18413349
Must be a writer's convention. I mean, we ain't as smart as humans, so how can we say what humans'd do?

>>18413367
Humans are like babies. Can make cool stuff, but knocks it all down.

I think the 21st edition lore got out of hand personally.

I mean, this "internet" thing? Come on.

It totally breaks any sense of scale the world had when they can just contact each other in seconds and with such ease.
Fucking casuals.

We thought it was bad when the Auto-mobile came along, and THEN they added those bloody "planes".

I mean, 20th edition had that World War 1&2 thing that was kinda cool, but it just went to shit right after that.

The economic system is bullshit as well! I mean, it's just unrealistic.
No one would give all there money and trust it to these "bank" things.
They keep screwing everyone over and yet they STILL don't just kill them all!?
Fucking shitty writers.

Me and my group are just gonna play good ol' fashioned ALPHA.
Those Roman guys were pretty interesting!

How come some people can have fetish on humans? I mean, they skin is fucking yellowish pink or something. Some artists even make them in other colors, like brown or red, or even yellow. But I never saw anyone making a green human. Not even musk green, how can someone feel horny about something in such a bizarre color?

>>18413395
>The Cold War

Most boring piece of shit I've ever experienced. Nothing fucking happened.

>>18413395
>plays Alpha
>uses Grolious Olient image

Ya ain't even tryin'.

Fucking Human Mary Sue's man.

Just cause they live to 90 years old and they're all graceful and shit.

In MY setting, it's ORCS ONLY.

>>18413443
Some of us like dat, ya git.

Don'cha ever get tired o' green skin an' tusks?

Ev'ry so often I just get me a hankerin' fer summat else.

>>18413443
They turn green when they get sick.

>>18413453
>Mary Sue

Ya keep usin' that word. I don't fink it means what you fink it means.

Also, if dey's so Mary Sue, why's you usin' one as a pic?

we ork are very useful in today society
we are the blue collar.
we are stronger then punny humans
we can eat things they don't eat.
and if we work well sometimes we are able to see the daylight

>>18413447
But dat tension, man!

>>18413447
On da otha hand, dere's some interestin' Elseworlds I've read where dey DID set off Nukes.

How come humans gets prettier in a gas mask anyway.

>>18413443

Where do they get this ideas of skin color anyway? I mean. Green and grey worked for extra camouflage in the mountains and forests when we haven't developed iron weapons yet. And it helped our ancestors to be stealthy and all. Different sunlight exposure and vegetation can explain lighter and darker tones of green and grey. But how come some humans are BLACK AS PITCH and some are PINK AS FUCK. Really.

In my setting, humans are green. Because it's more realistic.

>>18413447

You hit the nail on the head.

They set up this MASSIVE scale war, and hype up these new "Nuclear" bomb weapons as some kind of world ending level 10 spell....

AND THEN NOTHING.

Writers just wrote themselves into a corner, they didn't want to restart the whole world.
Utter bullshit. They kept us pumped for AGES and then let us down.

And since then? Bloody nothing, but some scuffles in some deserts and civil riots.
Woo hoo.

It's like they don't know where they're going anymore.

WHAT HAPPENED TO ALL THAT LORE FROM THE "SPACE" EXPANSION!?
"WHOOPS, ERR IT GOT CANCELED HURRR"

THAT DOESN'T HAPPEN.

>>18413507
Fuck those grey guys. If it weren't for us green, they would be still in the mountains throwing rocks to kill birds! Greenies invented the axe, and greenies discover how to ride horses. We are superior. No matter what those political correct people say.

Green master race!

>>18413507
I think the pink is a sort of warning sign. To trick bigger animals into thinking they're poisonous or something.

>>18413525

THE OLIVE HOLOCAUST IS A LIE.

WAKE UP SHEEPORCS!

DAMN BIG NOSED OLIVES. GREEDY FUCKS.

I like how Waraxe 20k see humans:
They are just some weirdo skinny people with puny guns that lived controlled by some tyrannical emperor. And they come in huge swarms consuming planets and shit, and building lots of tall buildings with details, so they can breed on them and make more soldiers.

I wish they would expand the lore on the human empire. It seems nice, but there is almost nothing about it. A guy suggested that they were making a new codex that would include superhumans soldiers, almost as strong as orcs individually, as a change on the battlefield. But that would be unbalanced, since they already got those impossible advanced tech. (laser cannon? whats next? magic rockets?)

>>18413555
Yes, another Crapaxe 20k thread. way to got, dickhead

Fluff wise, do humans have tiny cocks to fit their slender frames? because i heard women females were tight as hell

My party found dis human girl in my games auction, she was being a slave. What do?

>>18413598

Oh here we go...

>Human slavegirl, wat do?

>>18413589

I used to play WarAxe 20k....but those prices man...

Games Chopshop are a bunch of greedy Olive skinned bastards.

How many Teeth do you need just for a bloody Human tank!?

>>18413631
That's why i stopped with Waraxe 20k too...Fuck, spending all my lootz in my Ork Army. This and fighting against grey kids with their Imperial Guard...Seriously, fluff wise, the humans are a joke. But IG is just not taking the game seriously enough.

>>18413600
Go full adventurez of Noh on zem.

>>18413600

Fucking neck beard Orcchildren, you're all the same!

I'd look after her and give her a nice job at the Drake Butchery shop....

WHY CAN'T HUMAN'S BE REAL!?

>>18413667
because beautiful girls in chains who obediently do what they're told and work in your butchery are a FANTASY. I hear people E larp stuff like that sometimes though.

>>18413395
Pic related, my rokkin' humie hackbaker.

I loved that update, humies with their crazy computaters. We actually played a campaign through to the end, and you'll never guess what our GM did, the mucking awesome bastard; We negotiated a world peace, and brought all the humies together under one central government, and then the GM trotted out his homebrew space rules!

Best game ever.

>Walk into GameStomp
>Cute deep green skinned orc girl on the till
>Her fangs are huge and polished
>I take a copy of HumanQuest up to desk
>Boar intestines are falling out of my pockets
>She chuckles under he breath
>Begin crying
>Run out the store, never go back

FUCKING GAMESTOMP.

>>18413658

Yeah I mean seriously, you expect us to believe those squishy little things can shoot glorified flashlights at us and win? And their main tank is a fucking tracktor for Gork's sake! A. FUCKING. TRACTOR.

Postin in an epic thread

>>18413737
>not buying at Games Chopshop
>2012

haha gamestomp sucks

>>18413801
Most overpowered human ever. How come in "Isengard Chronicles", it take Lurtz five huge arrows to kill this guy? AND HE [/spoilersdontworkon/tg/] DIES [/spoilers] afterwards! To another human. I never got that. It's almost as that part where Krumbz and Krunk are counting how many humans they kill during the battle of helms deep.

>>18413805
>>18413737

>Paying for games and not looting villages for them

Go back to clubbit gobfags.

>>18413824

The author just has a HUGE hard on for Humans.

Putting his damn fetishes into the story.

Typical for a liberal hummie-lover faggot.

>>18413841

Did you hear?

They're trying to push a law through that's going to stop Looting!
Seriously.

They'll be taking our Axes next!

One by one we lose our Orc Rights.....

My friend made some Humans for his game and he made dem da biggest Marog Sues. Armour weapons and magic is all better den ours.
Day are called a neutral race dat everyone trades wit and we're da evil ones, an day don't rape female orcs when dey kill der husbands, dey sound queer or what?
>Dis is what my party does to any humans we find, we'll show da GM what we tink of his goody neutral shoes humans

>>18413824
Isengard Chronicles is bad. You should try reading "A song of Broken Skulls". Each book is HUGE (like, 100 pages), and there is motherfucking seven of them, but the characters are more realistic (they don't do stupid romance shit and majiks) and more waaaagh. And it's only orks, althouhg it's fantasy

This is some pretty incredible sci-fi/fantasy mashup, you guys seen it yet? Mucking sweet!

"Two Asian-American "surfer-dude" brothers discover they are the long lost princes from a China Sea Island. Part of their inheritance are magically-induced martial arts prowess. Using their new powers they act to overthrow the island's current dictator, a despotic madman."

Best humie movie I ever seen. Even better than the Rokky movies. I WAAAAAAAAAGHED when Rokky won over the Hobgobbos in Rokky IV!

>>18413938
gobbo please, that vidyo-googag snerked so bad i had to kill the grot in frunna me

>>18412767
>>18409117
>>18409104
Allow me to summarize the notes my D&D character took on the goblinoid races, to help resolve this argument:

Goblins: Shitty gnomes.
Hobgoblins: Shitty (and tall) dwarves.
Bugbears: Shitty goliaths.

Make sense now?

>>18413883
Dis is now a Looted Gits/Trukks Thread

>>18414048
I 'ear dat!

Get a lowd a'dis.

>>18417805
I don't get dis fing, though. If ya're gonna loot summat, why not loot summat good, like a Gnu or Utah?

>>18409023
Human racial traits would just be the complete inverse of current Orc traits.
Seriously, where does that whole "favor of destiny" thing come from?

>>18417864
Humans are some of the squishiest guys around, yet they're all over the mucking place. There has to be SOMEONE upstairs looking out for 'em.

How many spiders could you fit into a dark human's vagina? I'm trying to figure out how many they could spew from their nethers.

Best human character or bestest human character?

>>18418771
Dat ain't Genghis Khan, ya git.

>>18418771
>>18418794
Both ya gits keep misspelling Patton!

"Men, this stuff that some sources sling around about America wanting out of this war, not wanting to fight, is a crock of bullshit. Americans love to fight, traditionally. All real Americans love the sting and clash of battle...Americans play to win all of the time. I wouldn't give a hoot in hell for a man who lost and laughed. That's why Americans have never lost nor will ever lose a war; for the very idea of losing is hateful to an American.

...There are four hundred neatly marked graves somewhere in Sicily. All because one man went to sleep on the job. But they are German graves, because we caught the bastard asleep before they did.

...My men don't dig foxholes. I don't want them to. Foxholes only slow up an offensive. Keep moving. And don't give the enemy time to dig one either. We'll win this war, but we'll win it only by fighting and by showing the Germans that we've got more guts than they have; or ever will have. We're not going to just shoot the sons-of-bitches, we're going to rip out their living Goddamned guts and use them to grease the treads of our tanks."

>>18418936
"...I don't want to get any messages saying, 'I am holding my position.' We are not holding a Goddamned thing. Let the Germans do that. We are advancing constantly and we are not interested in holding onto anything, except the enemy's balls. We are going to twist his balls and kick the living shit out of him all of the time. Our basic plan of operation is to advance and to keep on advancing regardless of whether we have to go over, under, or through the enemy. We are going to go through him like crap through a goose....

...From time to time there will be some complaints that we are pushing our people too hard. I don't give a good Goddamn about such complaints. I believe in the old and sound rule that an ounce of sweat will save a gallon of blood. The harder WE push, the more Germans we will kill. The more Germans we kill, the fewer of our men will be killed. Pushing means fewer casualties. I want you all to remember that."

>>18418947
>>18418936
'E was so 'ard they named four tanks an' a ship after 'im!

>>18418951
Got stompd like a lil' grot tho. Kar accident, dose humies always dieing like gits to stupid reasons. Ghazkull never eva would die froma battlewagon crash. Da battlewagon would die, but Ghazkull wouldn't.

all this thread gives me erection

>>18418936
>>18418794
>>18418771
I don't really any of these characters, mostly because their just humans with Orc strategies and orcish ways of thinking. Khan was just a warboss who used the classic orky strategy of beating up all the smaller clans to form one big Waaagh!, Vlad just uses the basic Orc strategy of terror warfare (the only reason humiefags think it was unique is because it was done by a human villain instead of an orc hero) and Patton was just your basic orc general.

>>18418771
Drakula was cool until the writers brought him back and said he was a vampire. Serious, what was the hell was that retarded crap?

>>18419396
>I don't really LIKE any

So what's everyone's favourite human race? Mine are sand humans.

>>18418071
Humans are pretty small, like >>18413598 implies. So probably only a fistful of them.

Still, I can't believe what they write about weird-ass spider deities like Anansi that dark humans worship. I mean what the fuck.

>>18419480
I like Ice humans they where properly choppy and stuff.

So i've been playing Avenue Brawlers, and i'm the only one who is kinda annoyed there is one Orc related fighter on it?
Blanka is cool and all,and what he lacks on dakka he has in shocka, but the game is populated with fuckin' humies.
What's the problem with those developers
>Even the Orc is half human
>What the fuck Corkcom

>>18419396
But dat's why they stand out! Everyone knows humies are supposed to be weak and cowardly, not running around like a bunch of us.

Archive and such!

>>18420557
They're just trying to boost their sales with humanfags by inserting a bunch of sexy, fightin' humans in their game.

>>18409103
>mini people
>Goblinoids in D&D aren't related to Orcs
>Bugbears are bigger than Orcs and Hobgoblins have varied from slightly smaller to on a par
I am such a nerd.

>>18413447
I know, right? The whole series was just a fucking cocktease. Even in the violent modules you had to be all quiet and stealthy and shit. The whole fucking thing, every single release, they're building up to these huge fucking BOOM things they've got, that they're gonna let off, any minute now. I was so hyped, even when the books got more boring I kept getting them. I couldn't wait for the payoff, for those things to be launched. BOOM!

Then it all collapses due to fucking economics and politics. Who the shit thought that was interesting? I want to beat them with a rock.

>>18420557
You and me friend.
At least in Tekken most of the fighters are orks, but they have to come with that bullshit of "humie gene" that makes the fighters overpowered.
Fuck that

>>18409023
Wouldn't Orc be the common language if this was written by Orcs? Why would there be an option for Orc when they already have common?

>>18413824
J. Orc Orc Tolkien was a noted humie-lover.

>>18419413
Nah, fink about it! What's a vamp-pire got? Fangs, rite? Like tusks. An' a different color ov skin. 'Course it's white, not green, but Drakula's a novel about an orc in human society! Stronger, more kunnin, more brutal, got tusks and he's da boss. Da author couldn't make it too obvious, dat's all.

>>18418771
That ain't caligula.

>>18420706
An' da zogga gets shanked at da end.

Gotta wonder what's up wif deez boys, though.

>>18424985
Darn humans can't even give him a fignified feath and chop his head off...