I really need a bigger Strike Witches folder.

time to monitor this thread

YES.

Use SKILLZ. Using WEP will have us murdered by our crew chief and possibly Minna.

>>17660847

Or more accurately, I need one that isn't 85% Sanya. Sorted would help too.

pilot skillz. we dont even need war emergency power. thats babbys first racing trick.

rolled 17 = 17

>>17660742
Zero fucks.

Well we really shouldn't total this most likely really expensive untested prototype plane by overstai-
Fuck that!

Max performance

>>17660742
Also, holy shit 8 quests on the first 3 pages. WHY TUESDAY.

>>17660871

No you don't. Give in.

Performance. If the plane gives, I'd like it to happen outside of combat and keep the engine salvagable.

2v2. Are you a bad enough dude to break the tie?

Are you suggesting fucks being given, in a no fuck giving zone? After whats been forever (a day or so) of not flying, of all the chaos and bull crap we've gone through, I realized, life is short. As far as i'm concerned, this is the last time we will ever fly, and I will be damned if we don't make the best of it.

Lets see what happens before the WEP. If she starts pulling away or if we end up being neck and neck. PUSH IT TO PAST THE LIMIT!

>>17660861
Not to give myself an extra vote, but CREW CHIEF BUSY. If we WEP our engines will need work and he will MURDER US. Then Minna will MURDER US for breaking the brand fucking new plane.

>>17661033

neat. wheres the WEP button?

>>17661033

I thought we were Pilot NoFucksGiven?
Sounds like you're giving a fuck.

Besides if this thing is gonna explode I'd rather it happen now, not in combat.

.00001 fucks. We do want to keep this toy right?
Also who ever first posted Dos Gringos I love you.
THEME SONG
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iM3vLer6YFg

You eye the big, red button.

THE BIG.

RED.

BUTTON.

It whispers to you. Promises of power unimaginable, the mighty double-wasp radials shaking with the combined power of thirty-six smoking-hot cylinders gorged on all the air the turbo-supercharger setup can feed them...

... and then you imagine screaming as both flaming engines leave a pretty double-helix smoke trail in the sky as you slam into the Channel in an unpowered, unrecoverable spin. Despite that Fate Of The Fighter Pilot bullshit you fed Gertrude earlier, you're pretty keen on the whole living thing. There's stupid and then there's utterly damaged. You shut the Big Red Button out of your thoughts.

That doesn't mean you're not going to make this bitch walk and talk, though. You listen intently to the radio.

"GO!" Charlotte shouts, and you ram the throttles forward against the stops.

>>17661061
Using WEP for everything just makes us look like a noob, not an aceinaday pro.

Are you a noob, or a pro?

Just to point out, since people are apparently dense as fuck:

GERTRUDE PROBABLY HAS A CRUSH ON US.

That's why she was getting so pissed that we were calling Minna by her first name, but not calling her "Trude".

>>17661076
After we land, assign Ian and Sean to lubricate Charlotte's valves.

>>17661092
>neckbeards
>think and/or notice woman's feelings
Pick one.

>>17661092
What if Gertrude and Minna BOTH have crushes on us? D:

>>17661092

we know, play it cool dont be a waifufag. maybe theres a romance subplot in our future maybe not who gives a fuck. we're in a motherfucking turbosupercharged goddamn widow right now. how can you think about anything else at a time like this?

>>17661129
>mfw
Does it look like I give a fuck?
When I have no face?

>>17661129
then we have two seat warmers.

>>17661076

The engines bellow like sodomized lions, and you see the manifold pressure gauges leap swiftly. The frame of your new Black Widow trembles with power as the engines hit their stride, greedily gulping air and fuel. The plane is fitted with Curtiss constant-speed airscrews, but you've already adjusted the prop pitch manually. The mighty radials dig into the atmosphere hard, roaring magnificently as they enter their power-band.

Shirley is already several hundred yards ahead of you, but you don't worry about that - she'll accelerate faster, for sure, but the long haul will be a different story. And besides -

"We're accelerating like a bat out of hell!" Ian whoops. Compared to what you managed before, he's right. Turbochargers are more efficient, superchargers give instant power - and your new ship has both.

You take your hands off the controls and slam the engine cowling flaps closed, eyeing the oil temp gauges with worry, but the extra speed is already cooling the big Wasps better then usual.

"This. Is. AWESOME," you manage, trying not to sound like an idiot child with his first Red Ryder gun.

>>17661092

I dunno, these witches are bitches, and you can never quite tell what a bitch is thinking.

Besides, we have that thing going on with the French cunt. Troll romance > Actual romance.

>>17661076
But, once she does start pacing us like we're walking, we use the Button, right?

The sweet, candy apple red button?

>>17661153
You'll shoot your eye out, kid.

>>17661133
Simple, pilots think of only 3 things. Ass, booze and flying. He is covering one of those so its aight

>>17661153

You close your eyes and feel the engines through the airframe, devote your ears to their voice. You advance the mixture control till you hear the Double Wasps' fearsome cacophony settle into a strong, throaty roar - they've more then enough air to gobble up a lot more fuel, now. At this altitude, the XP-61 eats it rather too fast, but that's not an issue now.

Shirley is closer now, only about three hundred yards ahead. You check the gauges: you've hit 362 MPH actual airspeed, which is about where a Widow tops off.

You watch the speed creep past that without much surprise.

The oil temp is creeping towards critical levels, but you hold the radiator flaps shut just a little longer, eager to see how fast the ship can go. Shirley seems to be pacing you now, not looking back at you. You suspect she's as interested in the new engines as you are.

Strike Witches Quest? Why does this happen when I'm on the gaming computer, goddamnit!

Well, there goes my evening, nothing's getting done now.

>>17661153
>"This. Is. AWESOME," you manage, trying not to sound like an idiot child with his first Red Ryder gun

why bother trying to hide it? I say give a loud whoop and go to MAXIMUM OVERDRIVE!

>>17661180
Lets save it for the final stretch. We're testing this thing right? And the only way to properly test it is to see how well it holds up at all levels of performance, even the part where we lose all sense and sanity.

>>17661235
Ah shit nigga. We're matching a witch with just an engine.

>>17661235

"FOUR-HUNDRED FUCKING MILES PER HOUR!" you howl ecstatically into the intercom. It's an amazing speed for a Widow - and about what she was expected to make, with turbos installed. But despite the rising oil temps, you keep her at military power for a minute more. Shirley has drifted even closer, and from the heat shimmer around her Striker Unit, you can tell she's putting some real power in it now to keep abreast of you.

So to speak.

At long last, you see the airspeed indicator's needle finally grind to a halt, quivering around 395 MPH. Feverishly, you paw for your E6B, but Ian finishes the calculations before you do.

"Four-hundred eighteen MPH!" he crows. "Holy shit, but this bitch can MOVE!"

You agree. Looking at the gauges, you also know you're about to burn her up. You ease off the throttle a bit and begin wheeling the cowling flaps open.

And that's when #2 engine decides to pitch a fit.

>>17661307
SHIT!

We can handle it, don't worry!

>>17661307
FUCK.

machine spirits! HEED MY CALL!

Shiiit! I'm in class on my laptop I don't have suitable reaction images!!

(History of Aviation class to boot)

>>17661307
One thing left to do then [spoiler]FULL MOTHERFUCKING POWER![/spoiler]

Go with the grace of God

>>17661307

With a great banging and coughing, the starboard engine misfires on half its cylinders, and abruptly chokes out. You immediately slam your foot on the left rudder pedal and yank the stick into your belly even before the big radial finishes sputtering, and the big fighter is hauled into a dizzying snap roll. The big fighter has inertia, and it spins around three times before you're able to reverse the controls - more gently then normal, minding the dead engine - and fight the Widow out of the horizontal spin in a moderate left-handed bank. You've barely stopped spinning when you tip the nose into a steep dive, starting a gentle left-handed spin.

"Come on cocksucker, LIGHT UP!" you hiss into your oxygen mask, ramming your finger on the starter button. To your surprise, she does. You pull out of the dive gently, putting the radiator cowling flaps at half-open. The throttles are at half power already - you don't remember hauling them back. You take a deep breath, extremely satisfied.

"God damn I'm good."

That's when you notice half the world is screaming at you at the same time.

>>17661307
Reduce power, turn for home!

>>17661419
Panic and scream back.

Then give in to fate.

And take start to masturbate.

>>17661406
>spoiler tags don't work
oh come the fuck on

>>17661307
Come on baby, hold together!

>>17661443
Why hello, /a/non! Welcome to /tg/! We hope you enjoy your stay.

Sean was promising to rape your ghost in Hell, and is now sputtering as he contemplates the fact he's still alive. Ian is muttering something that includes "insane" and "glorious" and "fuck you forever" and Charlotte is asking if you're airworthy.

It slowly dawns on you that they all thought you'd entered a fatal spin, not an intentional one. You feel you should mollify their concerns.

>Words?

Is this the part a green ring comes flying out of nowhere?

>>17661443
Welcome to /tg/ bitch nigga.

>>17661458
"...what? They didn't teach you that in flight school?"

>>17661443
Moot refuses to give us spoiler tags. We're all like, "Oh, but Moot, sometimes we don't want to be spoiled" and he's all like, "BITCH. YOU ARE GETTING SPOILED ERRYDAY".

It's such a hard life.

>>17661458

Relax lads, that was only an engine failure. I Wanted to spin.

Question: are these threads archived or lost in the limbo of the net for all eternity?

>>17661419
Don't worry, that's just us being awesome and amazing.

Unless someone wants us, and then we should answer. You know, when we want to.

>>17661458
Uhhh... This piece isn't THAT important, right?

>>17661458
The engine died, I needed to spin to get it going again.

>>17661458
"WELL THAT WENT WELL. Looks like the engines are a bit tempermental, might need to keep them a bit cooler..."

>>17661491
>Chived

>>17661491

Archived twice. There's foolz, and/or whatever other auto-archives are about, and /tg/ maintains its own archive at sup/tg/. (With full image retention, too.)

Posting Strike Witches is encouraged, I need more images to go with the threads.

>>17661461
>Green ring comes out of nowhere

The aliums are MYSTERONS.

FINALLY IT ALL MAKES NO SENSE.

>>17661307
Slow down. Unlike modern ELECTRONIC SYSTEMS, these old analog systems tend to fail ..uncleanly, and you already burn through engines like a son of a gun, so stop the race and know your limits.

>>17661458
"So, up for the other direction?"

>>17661458
"I know I'm good, but you shouldn't be acting so surprised yet. That's the least I can do."

>>17661511
CAPTAIN SCARLET. IN DE STRUCTABLE!

>>17661510
>>17661507
Thanks

>>17661458
oh, so THATS the 'kill us' button. THIS one must be radio.

>>17661510
any particular request?

>>17661458
Just as planned.

>>17661485
I vote this.

>>17661555

Anything but Sanya; I've got enough of her, I daresay. I need more Minna, not much of her on the booru's, and she's pretty important in the story so far.

BRB, sammich.

>>17661579
Can we get an upgrade on the windshield wipers, make them strong enough to remove panty clad asses? Never know when a witch might start humping our ride.

>>17661577
Voting this also.

>>17661611

We can just punch her off.

>>17661611
No, the plan is to duct tape witches to the wings for MORE DAKKA.

>>17661654
Give them lawn chairs at least. Also we need juice box storage.

>>17661684
>need storage
In b4 B52 debate starts up again

>>17661694
How many juice boxes will fit in a b-52

>>17661694
How many witches can a 52 fit?

>>17661694
So, how many AIM-120 AMRAAM's can we fit in a B-52?

>>17661694
Pssht. We just need slightly less wing fuel and a cargo port for juice boxes. And some cookies.

>>17661709
>>17661711
god dammit you two

>>17661711
WRRRRRRRRRRRRRRY!

Hey plane, weren't you gonna trip ?

Replace now-pointless radio with stuff for them. They have headsets, we have a 150 lbs beast. Plane would fly better too.

>>17661711
This is the 1940s, if anything we should be looking at the first bomber meant to deploy its own smaller sub-units, the B-36.

>>17661742
150 pounds of juiceboxes would give an awesome witch range. We could just give Zucchini a pound of sugar and see what happens.

>>17661742
How many sidewinders could we fit in a B-52 if we stripped out the radios?

"... what?"

A stunned silence greets you.

"... where the hell did YOU scrubs go to flight school? That ain't shit."

"I promise you," Sean says from the back in a weak, reedy voice, "I will shit. In. Your. Dreams." Sean doesn't like snap rolls. He doesn't like them at-fucking-all. Naturally, you've become quite adept at them through constant practice.

Charlotte is flying close enough to reach out and touch your wingtip. She drifts up, then over, flying over your starboard wing and scrutinizing the engine carefully.

"Nothing looks or sounds off, but you should probably bring her in."

You think that's a pretty good idea, even without Sean promising to crawl overwing to your cockpit and cock-punch you. Keeping the XP-51 on half-throttle, you slowly spiral down towards Castle Barin, letting the big bird sink onto the runway gently. It's almost a perfect three-point landing, and you feel pretty damn pleased with yourself - it was a stellar performance, all around. Your crew is still high on the triumph that follows momentary terror.

You taxi the big fighter into the huge courtyard that lies in front of the cavernous hangar, and hop out while the props are still windmilling to a stop. Charlotte is already on the ground, stalking towards you from the hangar. Striker Units need a stand, they can't be parked just anywhere.

>>17661779
but all of those failed horridly?

>>17661741

well, its tuseday and quiet so far. dont gotta cross the bridge if you dont gotta cross the bridge.

>>17661779
...how many strike witches could we fit in there? i mean we could save them a ton of power if we use the plane as a sort of APC

>>17661741

Too lazy. Unless you want to ctrl-F my posts...

>>17661709
>implying witches are larger than 200 lbs bombs
ALL of them. Provided we can pull off horizontal storage.

>>17661806
Hammocks?

>>17661787
Guys, guys. IL-2 Witch. SO MUCH HURT.

>>17661787
>stalking towards us

Oh shit, we fucked up her Harley.

>>17661787
Get out and inspect her. Run your hands over her, work your fingers into her skin.

Our plane, not Yeagertits, I mean.

hey plane instead of turning your threads into image dumps heres the strike witches image board http://helma.us/sw

can get all the images youd ever want.

dont do it right now though, you're busy.

>>17661787

"What the hell happened up there?" Charlotte asks.

"The engine quit."

Ian slaps you upside the head from behind. "You're a font of comedic wit. I should let Sean kick your ass."

Sean limps forward, still looking rather green. "Just knock him down so I can puke on him."

"Well I... uh," you say awkwardly, surprised that you actually *don't* know what happened, besides you flying like a boss (a given.) You think about it for a second or two. "Well... the engine sputtered like she was having trouble turning over, and I'd just adjusted power and the radiator cowling, and she wasn't overheated or anything, so..." you realize you're getting ahead of yourself, and backtrack, trying to organize what you know in chronological order. "The engine was going to quit, so I snap-rolled in the opposite direction before the drag could pull us into a bad snap-roll or a spin. The drag made it easier to come out of the snap-roll, but harder to do it without throwing her into a flat spin or something nasty, so I had to baby it."

"And then you dove and started a vertical aerilon roll in the opposite direction...?" Charlotte queries.

You shrug. "Proactively countering any spin. The bad kind, that you didn't actually ask for."

>>17661792
Wait, how many B-52s could we fit inside a B-36?

>>17661859

Excellent, thank you. And sweet jesus did I need that Yanadre Minna.

Hey there. I've only skimmed the thread, so I apologize for going on a tangent.

With that out of the way, I've had a few ideas for Strike Witches-related stuff. I posted this on Reddit a few days ago, but it seems the thread was dead by the time I posted. I think these are some damn good ideas, and deserve attention. Even if I can't use them, I hope some of you will be able to.

http://www.reddit.com/r/anime/comments/onmf6/i_would_watch_strike_witches_if_it_looked_like/c3iu29c

>>17661882
0, the B52 is bigger

>>17661869
I like Charlotte but she can go fuck herself. Do we tell her how to pilot her Striker?

>>17661891
Wait, I thought our relationship was a 2 way tsun.... ohhhhhh.......

RUN!

>>17661869

"And why were you diving at all?" Charlotte asks slyly. You've got a funny feeling she already knows, but you've got to think about it for a second.

"The engine was flooded, I needed airflow to keep the prop turning and more air in the intake to fire her up again. Then I just leaned the mix."

Everybody's staring at you.

"I think I need to talk to you. Alone," Charlotte says. You begin to object, but she just seizes you by the collar of your jacket and begins hauling you away.

>Comply?
>Freak out?
>Gondor calls for aid?
>Mild trolling?

>>17661919
Well, what about the other way around then?

>>17661925
She's not making any suggestions or telling us how to fly. I think she, and the others of our aircrew, honestly want to know what the fuck we just did, and why.
Because it could mean a fatal flaw with the prototype engine design.

>>17661792
Lets see. According to several websites, the volume of the B-36's total bomb bays is 12,300 cubic feet. However, its aft bomb bay is around the size of a MK 25 atomic bomb, at 25 feet, while the forward bomb bay is slightly bigger than the MK 6 at 60 inches or so. Assume a witch gets a rest and recovery rack the size of one standard space for an enlisted on a submarine, or 15 square feet total.. divide 15 into 12 300 and we can hold if we CRAM EVERY WITCH IN sub style leaving enough room for a shower and a MRE serving galley (so say we divide 17 and use the remainder of the space for that..) we can hold around 723 witches. HOWEVER, we can double the space each witch gets and get around 361 witches.

>>17661945
Let's see where this goes first before flipping our shit. For all we know, we're about to get Strike Smooches for being awesome.

>>17661945
Comply!

>>17661945
Mild trolling.

>>17661919
Other way around. Seen both in person, B-36 is slightly larger length wise, longer wings and taller too.

>>17661945

>>17661945
Why not? Comply.

>>17661919
>>17661947

Nope, the B-36 is physically bigger. If you can ever get over to Dayton, Ohio, they've got the only surviving B-36 in the Air Force Museum there. They've got a dozen other planes literally parked under its wings, including a P-82 Double Mustang.

There's a reason they called that massive mofo the aluminum overcast.

>>17661945
go with her I suppose. she dosent SEEM to want us dead.

>>17661945
I think I've had just about enough of this shit. Refuse to move. She can sit there tugging at our jacket like a child or she can stop giving us the fifth degree and just say whatever it is she wants to say.

>>17661945
Comply, whats the worse that could happen?

>>17661945
We're going to need cigarettes by the time this is done. For one reason or another.

>>17661945
Comply. Shirley knows her shit, she should be our bro.

>Gondor calls for aid?

GONDOR CALLS, CHAMPION. Mild trolling.

>>17661950
/tg/-How many can we fit into a b52?

>>17661945
Comply-ish, but ask where the fucking fuck we are going?

STAND OUR GROUND.

>>17661945
Mild Trolling! Comply! Because calling for aid will fail, those fucking horse-riding bastards never helped anybody.

That and I still think Sean wants to shit in our dreams.

>>17661983
Fuck yeah, USAF museum. Also, go with Charlotte. Why not?

>>17661945
Troll while complying, obviously.

Comply, lets get it over with.

>>17661989
Why? She does have the right to order us around now, and we don't give a fuck.

go, but be a smart ass about it. like always.

>>17661983

Are you secretly my professor, planefag?

He was just telling us about various aircraft museums.

>>17662038
>>17661989
No need to be an ass. We give no fucks, but if the broad wants a private talk, why the hell not? But no dragging.

>>17661962
>>17661964
>>17661970
>>17661978
>>17661980
>>17661982

You see your aircrew following at a polite distance, hands in their pockets, just ambling along. They're setting up an informal escort, but Charlotte doesn't seem alarmed, which you hope means she isn't planning anything violent. Besides, she's been extremely pragmatic and she has an awe

some

harley

FFFFFFUCK.

Charlotte gets you just inside the hangar doors, and glances about suspiciously. She shoots your two boys a hard look, and they suddenly develop extreme interest in the men circling around the Martian portable maser, snapping photos, some distance off.

Charlotte cuts her eyes at you. "So what do you know about engines?"

"Push button, go vroom vroom?"

"Were you a machinist pre-war? Daddy a mechanic?"

"No, my old man's a-"

"Race-car driver?"

"Nope."

Charlotte sets back a bit, and takes her chin in her fingers thoughtfully. "Do you have any idea why I'm suddenly grilling you?"

>Answer?

>>17662038
And is hauling us around by the lapels for doing a damn fine job part of her authority? If she wants to speak with us in private, sure, fine, I'll even bring the bottle of wine and romantic music but physically hauling us off? Fuck her and the horse she rode in on.

>>17662090
Came down too fast and accidentally gave herself a wedgie from the Gs? Tell her to cut to the chase.

>>17662090

"Trying to pin down why I'm so awesome? I wish I knew myself. I could bottle it and make a fortun!"

>>17662090

she feels the need

the need, for speed!

>>17662090
"You..oh no, you want me to help you put a super-turbo-charger like I got on your Striker unit?"

>>17661945
SHE WANTS TO FUCK

>>17662090
Troll.
"You need something lubricated?"

>>17662090
"I swear, we were ordered to hop on that bike. Any damages to it can be deducted from the squadrons warfund."

>>17662090
Because you want us to have that awesome bike, and are making sure we can take care of it?

>>17662117

I laughed. I laughed maniacally. This please.

>>17662090
"Because you, like every other girl on this base, have to hide your romantic desires behind a wall of hostility?"

>>17662090

Grilling? Damn, woman. I didn't know witches could cook.

>>17662117

THIS. ALL OF MY THIS.

>>17662090
We fucked up her bike and she wants us to fix it? That or my theory from thread 1, we are a male witch. Dont say the latter.

if i knew I'd spill the beans and we could skip this cutscene toots, but I dont so why dont you ask what you wanna ask instead of talking loops?

You want me to screw with you

>SuccessfulPilot.jpeg

're bike?

>>17662117
this

>Strike Witches thread on /tg/
>Not deleted, not trolled to hell and back

This settles it. This board is good again.

So glad to have you back.

>>17662117
This, all my this

>>17662109
>>17662117
Both of these. In any order.

>>17662181
you have to be a certain type of mature to enjoy strike witches.

>>17662117

Can we just say everything, one after the other, rapid fire? They are all good and I want to hear them all again.

>>17662090
Wait wait wait.

How do we know "push button" but understand fancy spins to keep an engine going the instant the engine thinks about going tits up?

>>17662226
Sarcasm

>>17662226
Well, that would be the difference between a mechanic and a pilot, wouldn't it?

>>17662238
I understand physics related to flight being an air force brat. I dont understand
>>17661869
That sounds like engine speak to me.

>>17662090
"I can't imagine why."
"I only go for mechanics, fly boy." She replies, arching her back, perhaps not intentionally, but you get a pretty good view of her breasts from that angle.
"Well, better luck next time." She continues, patting you on your shoulder, as she walks off.

>Call her back and tell her your a mechanic
>Leave it to go check on Sean and Ian
>Check the craft

>>17662285
not sure if fag....

>>17662285
>>17662306

Completely fag.

>>17662306

It's not.

>>17662285
Wait, no witty remarks? And no Planefag?

Imposter.

>>17662285
Check the craft.

Even if you're interested, you don't chase women. Fucking mug's game. You let them come to you.

>>17662285
It's also nowhere near trolly enough.

>>17662285
Typing style is off, especially in comma usage.

>>17662142
>>17662127
>>17662117


You have absofuckinglutely no idea what Charlotte is talking about, so you do the only thing you can think of.

You look Charlotte dead in the eye, fixing her with a completely deadpan expression. "You need something lubricated?"

She's already opened her mouth to reply when the statement registers. You watch her tongue trying to form a response before her mouth abruptly shuts again. She rocks back ever so slightly on her heels, her mouth pressed tight, but quirked somewhere between pissed and amused.

"Not enough displacement for my cylinders," she says, trailing off as she reaches the plural 's'.

You huff, but before you can retort, Charlotte jerks a thumb over her shoulder casually and says "Lucchini could always use a better ground tech, though."

You snort. "Zucchini needs a god damn *leash.*"

Charlotte laughs aloud at that, but it ends with a hard-edged smile. "Yeah. She does. She likes to play mechanic a little too much."

You manage to contain your sense of horror at that last comment. Jesus Christ, she's like TWELVE.

"Well, I'd better give you back before your mothers get overprotective," she says, clapping you on the shoulder. She strides away casually, and you think she's swaying a little more then necessary.

Not that you're looking.

>>17662285
Very temped to respond "only they can operate your mechanical heart?"

If other anon dont vote for that, turn her around and tell her we were kidding. I'm getting tired of her tsundere.

>>17662361
Take a good long look.
It's what a pilot would do.

>>17662285
>didn't even namefag

>>17662361

I got lost in the lingo. Playing mechanic?

>>17662392
Playing mechanic.
Exactly what it says on the tin.

>>17662361
>Not enough displacement for my cylinders
DAMN

>>17662361
"Well, don't you need someone to look over your engines?"

>>17662361
Haha, I like her. She can take it as well as she dishes it out.
Take a nice, long look.

>>17662329
You walk out to the craft, fuck women, it's not as if you came here for the witches now. No, you came to 'splode some fucking tentacle aliens!

It seems Ian is feeling good enough to stand, as you approach the craft, you aren't sure where Sean has disappeared to.

"What'd she want?" He asks you simply.
"Something about sucking my dick."
"Women." He rolls his eyes.

You run your eyes over the craft, however, nothing seems to be too out of order.
>Look closer
>Fuck it, leave it for the mechanics
>Ask Ian

>>17662392
Work on your "tools."

>>17662361
>She totally wants to fuck

>>17662392
>>17662407

As in tinker with her striker units? Literally?

>>17662418

Look closer

>>17662418
look closer

Wait, what the fuck did she pull us aside for, anyway? She didn't actually SAY anything.

>>17662392

In the anime, Luuchini fucks with Charlotte's Striker and puts it back together bass ackwards.

You don't know this, however, so when Charlotte says "playing mechanic," you naturally think she's continuing the innuendo...

>>17662418
Look closer, especially at the engine that was about to cut out.

>>17662418
See, this is why planefag needs a tripcode. The troll just got marginally smarter.

>>17662418
Look closer. We need to know this plane. Not like some machanic - not that we can't play machanic, we just dont' want to right now - but we need to know every inch of this beauty.

>>17662418
Look closer, chat with Ian. We can open and close things without screwing them up at least.

>>17662441

Ah. Thank you. I didn't watch Strike Witches and don't feel like doing so. You make this look interesting.

>>17662441

Although that somehow makes it faster...

Also you need a trip, planefag. Before the imposter starts figuring out how to write more for his posts.

>>17662418

Piss-weak. Meet my tripcode.

>>17662436
We distracted her. Threw her through a loop.

>>17662441
Yeah, because all of that breast obsession in the anime all has to do with her Strike Witch unit.

>>17662494
How do we know that's you ?

>>17662503

We wait and see if the next post is sufficiently awesome.

Fuck I missed most of it and have to play catch up again... Damn college!

>>17662418
You look closer at the craft, when oh shit! what's this? It seems something is coming out from underneath one of the panels covering the engine.
Smoke.
You pull it back, and like opening a hot steam oven at 100c, you're completely smothered in it.
Ian can't help but laugh at your surprise, you simply shoot him a glare before leaning in on the craft. Looks like it's overheated, just a little.

>>17662509
>>17662521

I rest my case.

>>17662521
>>17662517
>>17662494
Oh come on guys.

>>17662418
Weve got to look deeper

>>17662503
I'm confuse.

>>17662533
Sorry, I can't hear you over the sound of you being a massive faggot. Try to turn the dial down from 11.

>>17662555
Better?

>>17662566
That's registering about a 4 or a 5. It'll do.

You walk over to Ian and Sean, who drop their interest in the Martian maser photography session as soon as Charlotte turns her back. They're staring at her ass too.

"Hey," you say, snapping your fingers.

"Ssssh," Ian says, intent on his subject of study. "She's.... gone. Okay, now you're the most interesting thing around again."

Sean looks at the goo of the pureed Martians still spread over the tarmac and hunkers down. "Nnnope."

You kick some Martian goo at him irritably. "So. Uh."

"What'd she say?" Ian asks.

"She asked me some questions about what I knew of engines, or mechanics."

"And then?"

"She implied that Luuchini is a massive slut."

By Ian's expression, that information is hardly surprising. "Was that before or after she burned you?"

"What?"

"We saw it," Sean said. "She was shocked, then sized you up, and then you were left sputtering. She shot you down."

"The wha- she's sixteen, you scumbag. I didn't-"

"Shame to see a young man cut down in his prime," Ian says casually.

"Queers," you grumble. Friends, man. Can't kill them, can't fly without them.

Now what?

>Downtime? Downtime!
>What's with all the brass running around this island, anyways?
>So Sean, about that Martian Sense you seem to have... time to talk about that.

>>17662533
You are aware its bad form to usurp a questfags name right?

SHUNNNNNNNN

>>17662521
Before you can do anything other than mask the smoke, by replacing the panel, it seems your smoke signal has attracted the attention of someone.

Someone who probably didn't want to see your machine in such a sorry state, Hartmann.

"Whoa, looks like you really blew it this time~"
"Nothing that can't be sorted."
"I don't know, I saw you flying with Shirley, it really looked like you were going to crash for a minute."

The mention of your intentional death spiral alone paints a sickly green colour across Ian's face.
Looks like this isn't the best place to talk about your race.

>>17662623
Hey sean, wanna go buy some lotto tickets ?

>So Sean, about that Martian Sense you seem to have... time to talk about that.

If he refuses to talk about it don't push it

>>17662637

SHUN THE NON-WRITER! SHUU~UN!

>>17662623
Downtime.

You know, we haven't even come close to achieving our daily Make Minna Enraged quota.

>>17662623
Downtime! Acquire food, hide from brass. See if Sakamoto drank all that booze. If so, acquire booze.

>>17662637
Stop it.
>>17662623
So Sean, about that Spidy Sense you have...

>>17662623

Downtime

>>17662623

find out whats the deal with all the bigwigs. that usually means that shit it gonna hit the fan or theres gonna be paperwork. oftentimes both. best to get ahead of the mess.

>>17662623
Find a place to hide friend's bodies.

Other then that, check out our bitching ride, and see if Sean's martian senses detend when we're going to kill him. And also, why the fuck is he an Outrider, the smug Irish git.

>>17662656
Planefag quoting Charlie the Unicorn? Fuck, now I don't know WHO planefag is anymore.

>>17662693
He's the writefag we deserve.

>>17662623
Get down to brass tacks on the brass

>>17662637
But then, before you can change the subject, Ian takes your face in his hands.

"How about a little medicine to make me feel better, honey?" He asks.
You can only but splitter in response as he takes you by the lips.
"Eeew, gross." Hartmann mutters, scampering off somewhere more interesting, not that it's really a priority at the moment.

Looks like today is going to be a long day.

Ask sean if he's a wizard
then downtime
>Make minna raeg
>Get food/booze
>Be a pilot
>etc

>>17662623
Ask about the Martian Sense.
Then we gotta figure out what all this brass is doing here.

>>17662722

downtime would probably be good. still gotta meet the rest of the wing. finish dividing e up into the bros camp and want us dead camp.

Shit. My class is ending soon. And it takes me an hour to get home!

>>17662722
Seriously, stop it. The trick is getting old and it's fooling no one.

>>17662779
Why are you reading this in class?

>>17662722

>>17662779
Impress your teacher by pretending you're staying late to do extra work.

>>17662796
Strike Witches is kinda a big deal

>>17662796

Cause this quest is awesome and I've been looking forward to it since last week. And it's a History of Aviation class, so it's kinda sorta related...

I am so confused

>>17662805
No disagreement, but christ man, you either are the most socially disconnected person I've ever met, or you are literally sweating so much testosterone that no one dares looking at your screen.

>>17662836

I'm in the back. No one's seeing the images, thankfully.

In twenty-four hours, you and your crew have become aces-in-a-day, saved Gertrude's life, trolled the ever-loving fuck out of half the Armed Services, fucked with the Wing Commander mentally and emotionally, and fought a 3AM ground battle with ambushing Martians.

"Miller time?"

"MILLER TIME."

You get halfway into the hangar before a terrible thought hits all three of you.

"Do they even... have alcohol here?"

"One of 'em does," Sean mutters grimly. The fire of the Olde Irish dances behind his eyes, and Ian and you both know alternate sources of alcohol must be located swiftly to stave off disaster.

Spotting a mechanic idly packing up his toolbox in one corner, your trio strides over. "Excuse me, but is there an O-Club or anything like that on the island...?"

The engineer cuts his eyes sidelong at you. "No. No O-Club. Just facilities for us lowly enlisted bastards. Doubt it would interest you."

>fuck him, make your own party
>fuck him, get off the island for a bit
>I KNOW WHAT YOUR HEART DESIRES

>>17662822
>You show up for the first day of class.
>Before it lets out, teacher asks: "Any questions about the upcoming course?"

"UH YEAH, WHEN DO WE GET TO THE FLYING LOLIS?"

>>17662869
If I was gonna commit Sudoku, that'd be a pretty funny way to start the day.

>>17662865
>I KNOW WHAT YOUR HEART DESIRES
Not sure what this entails, but go for it.

>>17662869
Always an important question..

>>17662865

>I KNOW WHAT YOUR HEART DESIRES

>>17662865
Make nice with the engineers. Make nice with the men with the beers. Make nice with the only other permanent staff on this base with dicks.

It all amounts to the same thing in the end.

>>17662805
>>17662779
here have some zucchini in her uniform,

i'm sure your teacher will appreciate it.

>>17662865
>I KNOW WHAT YOUR HEART DESIRES
I have no idea what this means, but I'm liking it.

>>17662865
>I KNOW WHAT YOUR HEART DESIRES
Alright, fucker. What's it gonna cost us?
Fucking enlisted knows he's got us over a barrel when it comes to alcohol.

>>17662879
>Sudoku
>mfw

>>17662865
We'll make our OWN club, with blackjack... and hookers!

>>17662865
Son, if it serves a stiff drink I am VERY interested, rules be damned.

>>17662722
"Ian! Ian" You shout, pushing him back.
He seems a little stunned, and takes a minute to adjust before saying anything.

"I thought you weren't interested in women?"

"So you thought I would want your dick instead?"

"Kind of..."

"Your a fucking faggot man."

You walk off feeling a little dejected, that your friend would think you are actually romantically interested in him.

As you reach the main building, you happen across Hartmann once more.

"Sooo...What was that all about, lover boy?"

"Shut it." You aren't really in the mood for her shit.

"Aww, don't you like him?"

>Punch her
>Ignore
>Kiss her

>>17662865
Get off island for a bit! Assuming we can get a jeep. Or some bikes. There ARE bars nearby, right?

>>17662865
>I KNOW WHAT YOUR HEART DESIRES

it calls to me, like an unlabled button on a sensitive piece of electronics.

>>17662865
>Drink with enlisted
>implying rank matters when you are drunk as fuck
>Captain partying with Seaman Recruits.jpg

>I KNOW WHAT YOUR HEART DESIRES

>>17662930
>and hookers

She's TWELVE.

>>17662865
N-no booze?

WE'RE GETTNG OFF THIS ISLAND! TO BOOZETANNIA PROPER!

>>17662935
KISS HER

>>17662935
>Kiss her

>>17662935
Since this isn't going anywhere anyway.

>rape

>>17662865
>Just facilities for us lowly enlisted bastards

"we're the lowest enlisted officers on this island, and we're night fighter pilots, any port in a storm, any runway in a tempest, etc. etc.

>>17662952
>>17662958
Why are you guys responding to the troll?

>>17662952
>>17662959
Stop encouraging the troll.

>>17662917
>>17662879
>>17662822
Inb4 some Anon bitches about a guy with a computer sitting in the back of his classroom

>>17662972
Why do you believe they're not also the troll?

>>17662988
The response posts are too close together. So he's either proxying or at least one of them is stupid enough to feed the troll.

>>17662936
YES! WE WILL DRIVE OFF THIS BOOZELESS ISLAND! ONTO A LARGER ISLAND FOUNDED ON BOOZE!

>>17662918
>>17662917
>>17662917
>>17662910
>>17662906
>>17662896

You sigh and look off into the middle distance dramatically. "Too bad. Guess we'll have to fly to Christchurch to get the kinks worked out of that new bird."

The engineer just grunts, loading his toolbox with his back turned to you.

"Guess we can pick up our overnight bags while we're there," Sean says

"Just overnight bags?" Ian scoffs. "We can bring all of it. The Widow is so... *big.*"

The engineer's hand freezes in mid-air with his last wrench.

"Yeah," Sean says thoughtfully. "Especially if you don't load the amidships fifty-cal bin... and in the wings... there's just so much *space,* you know?"

"And those new engines have so much power..." you muse. "You wouldn't even notice the extra load..."

The engineer isn't even breathing now, his hand clenched tight on the wrench.

You take a stealthy step closer. Lean over.

"I know what your heart desires," you whisper intently.

The engineer shudders.

"At twenty-thousand feet, it's cold."

He positively quivers.

"Anything in the wings... gets *ice* cold."

"Come with me," he says in a low, strained voice.

>>17662983
So... I'm in class, and there's this guy in the back of the classroom who...

Nah. Just fucking with you. I'm at my house.

Anyways, people do not encourage the troll. It's probably Mr. /a/ccelerator from the last thread, trying a new tack because we insulted his waifu.

>>17662958
>>17662952
Before the girl can saying thing else, you grab her by the shoulders and plant your face against hers.
Usually sixteen year olds aren't your thing but your manhood is at stack, fuck Ian, you definitely weren't turned on by his hot dry lips against yours.

No, this girl will do instead.

Fuck it, you go the whole hog, pushing her back against the wall, you quickly discover how easy it is to pleasure a girl when she is wearing but simple pair of panties.

She moans slightly as your rub your fingers up and down her crotch. Damn, now you're starting to get a boner.

Quick, you must act! And so you drag her into a side room. She doesn't even bother to resist.

As you throw her against the bed, it occours to you that this might not be legal, no wait, she is sixteen, surely it's fine. You're on an island in the middle of nowhere, surely this was to be expected around a bunch of young girls, especially when paired with guys.

>>17662980
>>17662972

Obvious samefag bumping his own posts~

>>17663026
Is it odd that the thought of a fucking-cold beer refrigerated in the wing of an aircraft gave me something of a hard-on?

>>17663054
Not in the least.

>>17663054
do fucking want....

>>17663040
... proceed

>>17663054
Hell yeah.

>>17663054
Nope. Everything checks out.

Beer in wings, wait till ice cold, hang with the enlisted, pantsless ladies will join in if interested. A good day shall be had.

>>17663054
(Pappy Boyington would say, no.)

The engineer leads you to the male dormitories, on the opposite side of the huge castle as the Witch's quarters. The men even have their own kitchen and mess, and when you're introduced as the men with the Big Plane With Huge Amounts Of Internal Space Nobody Looks Into, you're greeted quite warmly indeed. A man named Mac sits your trio down on a worn-out, overstuffed sofa and smiles at you.

"We usually don't tolerate you pilot sons-of-bitches in the land of the working man," he says good-naturedly, "but after the shit you guys pulled last night, we'll overlook that."

"When you say space," another man asks you, "like, how much space are we talking about?"

"We have to fuel her differently to keep center-of-gravity balanced. That kind of space," you inform him. He nods, grinning. "Good. How soon can you work out an excuse to get to Christchurch?"

"What's the rush?"

"We're going to have a proper send-off for our boys," Mac says, and the buoyancy in the room dies a sudden death. Without looking around, you know the smiles you saw earlier were forced.

"In that case, I think we can accelerate our schedule," Ian says.

>>17663155
Someone forgot to clear the name field~

>>17663155
Huh. Well we' had our 52 discussion, our juice boxes, and strapping Witches to our Wings. I guess it was just inevitable.

>>17663167
>"In that case, I think we can accelerate our schedule," Ian says.
Wanna try tonight?
We ARE night fighters, after all.

>>17663155
You appear vexed.

>Fucking faggots, you think I'd write something so gay?

Judging from the "planefag" you left in your name field, I'd say you're pretty homo, son.

And perhaps, just a little... mad.

>>17663155
>neuroi can't communicate
>fails to mention two incidents of neuroi attempting communication or using Witches, clearly indicating they have some vague understanding of humanity and had some attempt at communicating

Fucking casuals, I bet he doesn't eve read the twitter.

>>17663194
Uh, engine? Also our crew chief is busy on the OTHER P-61. So we need some time to get shit looked over.

>finally get caught up
>pilots teaming up with ground crew holy shit

I fucking love this quest

>>17663255
What about the engine? It's new, it works, it's just got a few hiccups, and it's not going to stop us from going.

>>17663194
We're going to need to get that engine checked out first. Have the engineers give it a once over and then have them recommend a test flight to say... Christchurch, so that the crew can monitor performance.

>>17663255
The engine is running, it wasn't damaged, and should be fine as long as we don't push like we did when we raced Shirley.

>>17663155
>broken character
Son, here on /tg/ that means sonething completely different. Now get out of here before ultraman gets here, I told him you called his mother a plant.

>>17663278

This sounds like the perfect idea.

>>17663278

sounds like a plan.

>>17663155
>Accelerator5.jpg

It all makes sense now

Fake writefag confirmed for spammer from previous threads.

>>17663167
does our aircraft have any bomb racks or external fuel tank mounts?
if so, how fast can they make us some "drop tanks"?

>>17663167
>>17663194

You suggest making the trip after nightfall, and Sean agrees. "This place is starting to look like a fucking planetarium, with all the stars running around. Makes me nervous."

"Oh yeah, that," Mac says. "It's been completely insane today. Hard enough to clean up the mess we've got today, after fighting a soddin' land battle, we've got the brass sniffing around."

"I hear Bradley's been ragging on Patton all day to get the coffee pot back," one man says wryly. "Patton just goes around collecting odd looks with the damn thing."

"... Bradley?" Ian asks. "Does anybody know what the hell is going on?"

Mac makes a zipper-like motion across his mouth. "Top secret. Nobody has a clue.

Ian nods sagely. "So what is it?"

"Counter-attack," Mac says, leaning forward eagerly. Every man in the room tugs their sweat-stained caps lower over their eyes and leans in with him, excited. "All the brass hats are in the area planning some kind of Big Push. The surprise attack last night - they hit us everywhere, you know - they're terrified that the Martians cottoned to the whole thing, and that's why they struck."

"But the Martians flubbed it pretty hard," another man chimes in. "And now they must be low on reserves."

"There's no way in fucking hell to know that," a young man - no, boy - says. He can't be older then seventeen, and his arm's in a sling. "Nobody knows SHIT about those crazy bastards."

The other engineer shrugs. "Well, they're burning through memo pads about *something.*"

How very, very interesting.

>Mood's shot. Who/what is next?

>>17663203
>>17663219
That would suggest that your are to close minded to consider that it was intentional?

As for neuroi, I never explicitly claimed they couldn't. The point was merely that the neuroi, even in their attempts to use witches or communicate, it has only been for their gain.
Using Misfits, neuroi-witch only appeared so the neuroi could gain a better understanding of tactics.
In the first season, it was simply because being neuroi core is suffering, do something about it.

I think this elitist attitude is unhealthy though, I don't think reading the twitter feeds by the various groups responsible for the franchise is that important, in order to be a 'fan' of the series. That and I wouldn't expect anyone to want to bother enless they really wanted more still from the series.

>>17663362

Incidentally, this raises the point that I haven't had a chance to expound on the Martians much. It's all thought out, but it just hasn't come up in the story yet. And infodump bad.

Meet the remaining loli pilots, then make our flight.

>>17663354
Need that engine looked at, then check in on the witches while dodging stars. Explore the island a bit?

>>17663354

Get some mechanicbros together and find out why our engine failed

>>17663362

>I think this elitist attitude is unhealthy though

that why you spam threads where people are enjoying the series in a way you dont like, innit?


>>17663354
well since we got some time for nightfall i guess we could drag sean off to some deserted door and pick his mind about why he can still radar without his radar.

>>17663291
Oh fuck off, you know what I meant.
For that matter, don't bring /tg/ into the arguement, this thread could quite as easily be shit posted anywhere else.
/a/ for example has plenty of these shit your own adventure quests.

>>17663354
Ask the engineers to take a look at the engine that nearly gave out.
We'll cover the flight out to Christchurch as a test flight of the repairs, as suggested by >>17663278
Then take Sean aside and ask him about his Martian Sense.

>>17663362
>>17663362
So you post elitist shit without having a maximum power level? Stop posting then, I mean I only knew about Strike Witches because I'm a general mecha musume fan (been that since.. jesus christ 02/03)and I saw some of the original artist's work ages ago. I have much more of a right now to shit on you for saying HURR ELITISM when you don't even consume and buy as much as you can, yet you shit on others for making a SLIGHTLY ALTERNATE UNIVERSE WORK. Please, if it asspains you that much.. get out, download the 4chan extensions for chrome/firefox, and use the ignore feature. I mean you are a cancer, the HURR I DON'T LIKE IT SO I SHIT ON IT poster. You are the cancer killing 4chan, and you should honestly grow up.

Anyway, thank you OP, I have to go to DEFEND FREEEDOM but I'll be rooting for your threads!

>>17663426
Yes, because there is a difference between expecting people to follow up on additional canon material and expecting not to alienate people who like the series by writing a fanfic that ruins the best parts of the series.

And what, did you honestly expect you wouldn't attract dislikes when you post material like this on the internet?

>Butthurt /a/non shitting up the thread
No fun allowed in /a/, right? I guess you want all the boards to suffer.

>>17663465
>I have to go to DEFEND FREEEDOM

Shoot a space Communist for me while you're out there, friend.

>>17663428

>shitspamming a thread you don't like instead of simply hiding it
>doing it every thread
>2012

what is it like to be autistic enough to do this?

>>17663485
Most normal people say they dislike something and leave it at that, rather than hanging around like a bad smell.

we should probably talk to sean. its come up in the story ones and as a 'choice' like three times. if we keep letting a plot hook bounce off our head like that itll catch us in the eye.

>>17663485
This ends now friend. You're giving a good people a bad name with your general disregard for creativity and fun.

This thread may continue with what minor fraction of a blessing of /a/ I can bestow upon it as a frequenter.

Pilots getting blazed, haters getting weak.
Lets chill ourselves a party shall we?

>>17663465
Making baseless accusations doesn't get you anywhere. Though you are right, I'm not American, so I try not to burn through as much of our planets resources as I can in the shortest time possible.
And since when as the amount of anime/manga/whatever counts determined where and where not you stand?

Shitting on me make you no better than I.

>>17663552
I just want to know about his martian senses.

>>17663278
>>17663407
>>17663419
>>17663424
>>17663448

You happen to mention that your new ship is a prototype, and if somebody were to diagnose Certain Issues with the engine, you'd probably have to fly to Christchurch for repairs. That's enough to send a swarm of your new buddies towards the hangar. Fifteen minutes later, they determine the engine is fine except for carbon buildup and some fouled plugs, indicating she ran too rich for a little bit.

"Sounds like you were spot-on," Ian muses. "You know why she choked out in the first place?"

Mac scratches his head. "Airflow to the engine was disrupted. Perhaps some funny eddy or something when you adjusted the cowling flaps."

You nod thoughtfully. "Luke said they were having problems with the ducting."

Mac nods, and points to the engine nacelle. "The scoops could probably be canted a little bit, or have little shields or something in front of them to break up any vortexes."

With that settled, Sean motions to repair to the central lounge, in the Witch side of the castle, and you all agree. It's happily deserted, and you all flop onto the couches carelessly, enjoying the rest. None of you had enough sleep, your injuries from last nights fight still ache, and the incident earlier didn't help much, either.

After some time dozing in silence, Ian addresses the ceiling.

"I know what Charlotte was fishing for."

>>17663559
It's not creativity if it's the original canon story with three additional characters pasted into it.
That's like colouring a girl's eye gold in paint, definitely not original or creative.

Also, is Sean a citizen of Ireland or is he an American like us? a guy named Sean with an 'Irish' accent being from the US wouldn't exactly be weird specially not back in ww2.

>>17663579
Explain yourself. Charlotte is good people and I'm interested in what she wants to know.

>>17663600

... You know what... If you dislike it so much, why do you slog through it to make "relevant" trolling?

Admit it, either it's a guilty pleasure, or you're a pitiful being who has nothing better to do than watch things you don't like and complain about them.

Go watch Season 1 again and leave us be.

>>17663683
Well it does help, it would be unjust to critique without first trying to understand.

HURRY UP AND SPIT IT OUT IAN GODDAMN YOU TALK SLOWER THEN UNCLE STEVE

>>17663579

Sean opens his mouth and Ian fetches him a a pillow to the face before he can interrupt.

"She was wondering about your uncanny luck with aero engines," Ian states.

You blink.

"You a wizard, mate?"

"Oh not THIS shit again," you mutter.

"He's got a point," Sean says to the ceiling, more to egg you on then anything else. "I mean that thing with the engine the other night, when we bounced Sanya, OOooOOoOOoo spooky," he intones, waggling his fingers.

You sit up straight. "I'm just good with engines. I've liked them all my life. I pay attention to them, the sound, the vibration. It's just intuitive. There's nothing ma... odd about that."

"Charlotte didn't seem to think so," Ian says seriously. "If I don't miss my guess."

"I know how to use the engine controls, big deal," you say, a bit uncomfortable. "I've seen weirder shit lately. For instance, I think it's time we talk about how Sean knew the Martians were there before they attacked, last night. In his sleep."

Sean sits up as well and fixes you with his fiery eyes. "I think it's about time to ask how you had two different guns slam-fire on you last night."

You open your mouth-

"-and the same gun refused to go off when it was pressed against your skull," Ian adds.

- you close it again.

>>17663771
I knew it! A wizard did it!

>>17663771

Never mind... Everyone is just magic. Question dropped.

>>17663771
>MEANWHILE, SAKAMOTO LOUNGES WITH HAREM.

AWWW SHIT NIGGA

>>17663771
Oh my god, we're a Warlock.

>>17663771
Oh. Shit.

tell everyone to shut the fuck up. this is an open lounge. the walls have ears.

we can talk in the plane tonight.

Wait, aren't there tests for magical ability?

>>17663771
Luck, duh.
And Sean still evaded the question about how he knew they were coming.

>>17663857

because as yet only bitches is witches and their powers arent all that subtle?

>>17663771
Welllll, what abotu you Ian? Can you shoot mind bullets?

Yeah, we're not fucking magic. Sean's Irish Magic, but like hell we are. We just know our shit, like any good Pilot.

>>17663881
And because Male Witches are rare and fuck over the 'the reason girls are powerful is magic'. Actual Planefag spoke of this before.

>>17663771
I put on my robe and wizard hat.

>>17663771

Flyers are a superstitious lot. Insane, unbelievable luck is not unheard of, not by a long shot.

But this shit is just getting too weird. And besides -

"Nobody say the M word. Not here. Of all fucking places, not here," you mutter. "With all the brass running around, I swear to God I will cut you."

"You don't have to worry about us," Ian says, and he sounds brooding, which constitutes an extreme emotive display for Ian. You wonder if he hasn't had any odd luck of his own recently.

"I noticed the quiet," Sean says. "I was listening to the waves hitting the beach - always nice to listen to, if you're sleeping near a coastline - and I realized, ALL I could hear was the waves. No crickets, no dick-ass nightingale plagiarizing all night, no HOOT HOOT or anything... island isn't that small. I just got a bad feel, you know? Last time I had that feel I was in the Kentucky bush and a cougar was sizing me up for lunch."

"So we're just good," Ian says thoughtfully. He's frowning now, another rarity for cool, collected Ian. "We're just that damn good..."

Both your friends make excuses and wander off. You don't stop them, since you've got some brooding of your own to do. You wander the halls of the castle alone, thinking. Trying to remember the last time an engine really got the better of you.

Plenty of stalls, forced starts, vapor-lock, backfires, you name it... but never a time you were well and truly defeated. Plenty of interesting battles, but you can't really remember the last time something you were familiar with got the upper hand on you. You just fiddle the controls without thinking and VROOM! up they go.

That's not... magic.

It isn't, god dammit.

>>17663913
There are no male witches.

>>17663949
They are called warlocks. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Strike_Witches

>>17663821
>>17663822
You mean you guys didnt figure this out when the engine gave on landing way back on thread 1?

>filmin master
Yes captch, I am a film master to see the plot twist miles away.

shit just got real

>>17663945
Nope, no magic here. Sean is just a freaky Irish leprechaun and his freakish Irish magic is rubbing off on you.

While we defantely don't brood, I suggest some hand to hand and gun training because if we're gonna be bum rushed by those Red Planet fuckers again, we should be ready.

>>17663977

no, that was a neuroi core strapped in a box and 'brainwashed'.

>>17663991
well hey there, looks like we're graced by a celebrity.

anyways, picked this thread up from the heretical love thread, loving it OP.

>>17663987
>I didn't.

I'm sure this comes as a shock to no one.

>>17663977
"It has been suggested by the novels that male Witches do exist but are rarer and likely much weaker hence their absence in the Witch corps contrasting the universal male presence in the standard armed forces."

And your source for this is?

>planefag's face when after all the speculation it's not magic after all.

>>17664017
Male witches do exist, they're just rare. As in, much rarer than a normal witch, and they don't have as much magical awesomeness. So, they're kind of useless.

It better not be magic! I want us to be just this good! Fuck sparklies!

>>17664041
Again, source?

>>17664060
The novels

>>17664057
Of course we're just that good. We're like...magic!

>>17663945
What generally happens when something bad does happen with an engine? Bad things.
If we'd had more problems with engines in the past, chances are decent we wouldn't be here. It's just selection bias.

What I'm curious about is why the Martians tried to capture the Witches before. What were they going to do with them that made capture a higher priority than "Kill them in their sleep"?

>>17663945

Your random wandering is interrupted by the sounds of an argument from down a side-hall. Your long talent at dodging responsibility and awkward meetings lets you recognize it as a dressing-down in progress.

"-ire command be taken by surprise. There's talk of relieving you on the spot."

"To replace me with who?" a cool voice replies.

"Somebody competent. Somebody-"

"-who'd either be here now, if they could be spared from their current units... or a damn filthy nip."

Silence. "What did you say?"

"Nothing you don't hear in the O-Club every other day. Damn. Filthy. NIP," the woman says, her voice steely cold. "Churchill would have an anyerism if a nip were running an entire squadron of Strike Witches, wouldn't he?"

"Don't be so sure," the man says hotly. "You fucked up, Wilcke, and we won't have it."

What?

WILCKE?

You boggle. That voice, cold and clean as a honed steel blade, putting some General over her knee.. that's Wilcke?

You're glad, because whoever the man is, he's way off-base. Especially obvious after Sean's testimony that the Martians hit the island in complete silence.

On the other hand, are you really going to interrupt a senior officer in a private meeting? His accent is obviously British, so it wouldn't be INSTANT career suicide, but still...

>>17664143
do what xcom does with live xenos?

>>17663945
It's not magic. We've just come to realize we are extremely lucky. If we thought about it in any other context we'd just say were lucky. Its just all these witches, man. Make you jump to insane conclusions.

>>17664075
Yes and the neuroi are actually nazis. My source you ask? The novels.

No.

When I ask for a souce, I mean, I want a concrete piece of text or some sort of proof that actually suggests this, than "Well, it's because I say so."

>>17664190

What do?

>>17664190
Fuck no. Stick around and listen, but stay the fuck out of it.

>>17664190
Do it. Minna doesn't need our help but we've smacked more stars than is prudent today. Why stop now? And it will confuse and possibly annoy Minna in the process.

Win-win.

>>17664190

lets troll them.

walk around the corner like we're deep in thought, then just freeze in a salute, but in silence.

if they don't see us at first, bonus points when they jump.

>>17664221

Indeed, Wat Do? Sorry, forgot the greentext.

>>17664190
Let's listen for a bit, and if it goes downhill for Wilcke, we step in. If it sounds like she can handle this; which she can since she is a commander, we'll just be on our way.

Nope. Turn around. Walk away. We don't care about this shit.

>>17664190
I suggest we move on for something less Garman and crazy. Because god, we are not sticking our dick in that bass hornet nest.

let the bitch hang

also,
>nip
fuckin wut? that aint no way to talk bout sakabroto.

>>17664236
This is pretty glorious to imagine, I'll second it.

>>17664236
>>17664227
What if, we walk in silently, salute, wait to be recognized, and then report that we were coming to report to Wing Commander Wilcke that at the time of the attack, we noticed that the complete absence of animal and insect noise, meaning that the Martians were able to operate in complete silence.
And we act completely professional and defer to Wing Commander Wilcke throughout, just to mess with her.

>>17664293
She is making a point. Japanese woman in charge of a unit defending England? FUCKING NIPS out the ass of the English.

>>17664305

No.

Here's a plan for interrupting: We need to file a flight plan and get permission from the base commander (her) for out little "trip" tonight, right? No-one's to know we weren't looking for her in the first place.

>>17664305
This. But change the we to Sean. Credit where it's due. A stealth landing via a craft that nobody knew the Martians had? Whoever is trying to chew out Minna is more of a dick than she is.

>>17664293
Yes, yes they are. That german redhead is insulting our boozebuddy. We keep out of this, and go find said booze buddy. Because we're going to fly a plane of drink here soon, and if we don't tell her, she will cut us. With her sword.

>>17664293

Slur for japanese.

Given Minna's BFF is japanese I doubt she's actually racist.

Stay, at least long enough to find out who this big wig is.

>>17664305
Also, call her Will-ke to piss her off.

>>17664328
>>17664305
>>17664236

These three. It's perfect. Troll both parties, and have a legitimate reason for doing so.

listen in but remain hidden

>>17664355
Nip is a slur for Japanese. Because they're from Nippon?

>>17664331
>>17664330

Product of the times. Back then, 'Nip' was just another way of saying "Japanese person". It didn't really have the hyper-offensive connotations it does nowadays.

>>17664362
Agreed

Nip isn't exactly offensive is it?
I mean, no more than chinaman, or oriental.

I mean, I'm not calling them slant eyed fucks, or gooks.

>>17664559
It's like the word Pakis for people from Pakistan. There's nothing intrinsically offensive about the word but a slur is a slur, you know? The word used matters far less than the intent.

You guys have been on autosage since >>17663987. Sup/tg/'s not archiving the posts below it.

>>17664619
There a new thread ?

>>17664619
Oh wow, yeah, we're at 380 or so.
Time for a new thread.

>>17664619
Suptg will archive it automatically every few hours. Is fine. Not saying that we couldn't use a new thread, but the archive is functioning properly.

>>17664619
If someone attempts to Chive it again it should update IIRC

>>17664619

It just has to catch up. It will

>>17664559

>Damn. Filthy. NIP
Yea. Perfectly PC for the time period.

Where is the update, planefag? You said there would be an update.

>>17664717

Patience. He's writing something amazing.

Or he had to go take a dump. One or the other.

>>17664190
>Stand outside door
>Wait for Minna to walk out
>Salute
Seriously. Icy bitch deserves a show of support. Especially when the brasshole in there with her is clearly talking about the attack like he knows anything about what happened.

Or we could offer to reach down his throat and pull him inside-out by his sphincter.

>>17664741
Maybe he has a laptop with shitty internet, and he's doing both.

Most pilots don't try to dogfight. The best way to fight is to lay for your opponent, and waste him before he knows you're there.

You decide to apply this maxim by standing right outside the door, at stiff attention, eyes forward.

"Are you visiting London next?" Minna asks coldly. "Or Pearl Harbor? Or any of the other Army bases that were hit all over the globe last night? I'm sure you've got some stiff words for them, too, Vice-Marshall?"

"Somebody does," the man retorts hotly. "Somebody's got something to say to all of them. You're no exception. You're no exception to a lot of things, Wilcke. Remember that." He storms out of the room and would have made a great exit on a good line had he not almost blundered into you.

"Who the hell are you?" he snaps.

You fire off a salute. "Sir, pilot reporting to Wing Commander Wilcke, sir."

He narrows his eyes at you. "I asked you who you were, yank." He seems to be pissed that you were obviously eavesdropping.

"Sir, I'm the man who just made ace-in-a-day and has been nominated for the DFC. "

The man seems to swell with suppressed rage, but he contains it. "What were you going to report?" That request is cutting right into Minna's command, and he knows it - it's a calculated insult.

"That my radar operator only noticed the attack was imminent when the crickets stopped singing. He compared them to a stalking puma."

The man blinks. "What in the Sam-Hill is a puma?"

"Mountain Lion. Cougar. A huge cat, to be precise."

The man seems to seethe with rage, but spins smartly and stalks off with that crisp step unique to the British services.

"your friend seems nice."

>>17664792
Hey Meta! Does that thing look like a big cat to you?

>>17664792

Well, I'm going to crash. Just wanted to say, Planefag, that I am so happy I got to be part of this, and you're threads actually hurt me laughing.

>>17664792
Hey Meta! Settle a bet wouldya: Does that thing look like a big cat to you?

>>17664820
>>17664829
RedvsBluemind.

>>17664819
I vote this

>>17664792
Success! That'll learn him, overwriting another officers authority to recieve a useless report.

On to logging our flight plans.

>>17664792
>"Sir, I'm the man who just made ace-in-a-day and has been nominated for the DFC. "

>>17664792

Am I the only one who thought Sean was making a milf reference with the bush and cougar talk?

>>17664888

Yes. You have a dirty mind. I guess that's why HL is so great.

>>17664888
Yes.
You need to cut back on all dem dating sims.

>>17664912
but how will we have delicious heresy for Heretical Love then?

>>17664907
New thread.

>>17664941
/d/
duh.

Or given more recent trends, /sp/