Huzzah! I was getting worried you weren't going to do it today!

>>17726192
> Yes

We must know what he's talking about. THEN we can deny the conversation ever happened.

>Yes
We must achieve Wizardhood.

I've been lurking since 10 in the morning.

And yes. Let's talk to the old german wizard.

>>17726192
Yes.... but we may still need to transfer to Egypt soon.

Yes, but we bribe him not to tell. This is imperative.

>ACE-IN-A-DAY BECOMES DENIABLE CIRCUS FREAK, PRESIDENT DENIES IMPOSTOR WAS EVER BORN IN AMERICA, WITCHES OF THE WORLD BURN EFFIGY
Oh god, my sides.

Also:
>AWAY, FIEND

>mfw you used my image and quote from last thread.

WE WIZARD NOW

>>17726192
Let the guy say his piece, but eye him the whole time.

Because he's clearly the crazy one here.

>If you're quite done with ze stupid, we must talk

He clearly doesn't know us at all.

Away Fiend!

>Yes

Seconding bribery

>>17726192
This is a terrible idea.
AWAY FIEND!

I really didn't want the MC to be magical. But I guess, yes? The story looks to be heading that way anyway.

Away, fiend!

No way we just simply accept that we belong in team sparkle.

>>17726354

I'm still betting on latent technomancy.

>>17726192
Yes.

We're still getting Minna that joke gift, right?

We have no need of fancy powers. We are just that damn good.
AWAY FIEND!

Yes, then we can deny everything.

We need to ask about the newspaper thing too.

>>17726326
h-hey we're not s-stupid! we're j-just an asshole. (emotional coping mechanism? possibly...)

If we're some kind of Wizard man does this mean we're going to suddenly sprout coyote ears and a tail whenever we're being awesome?

Yay strike witches quest! As If some of the girls needed more reason to dislike us.
Flee into the night and never speak of this again!
Away fiend

>>17726192

Talk but DENY EVERYTHING

>>17726400
if it hasn't happened yet, i don't think it will. apparently Wizard magic is more subtle than what the Witches have.

He dont know us very well do he?
Away Fiend.

yes. Because

wait, why are we running from the watchmaker guy?

If we are a wizard, we can't let ANY of the witches know of it.

as someone unfamiliar with the setting, what is the big deal with us being a wizard?

>>17726435
Women have achieved greater social equality and status due to the power of Witches and the role they've played throughout history. They are very touchy about men with access to their special snowflake magic.

>>17726435

Takes one to know one.

A wheezard, that is.

>dareentermymagicalrealm.jpg

yes

because i'd rather talk about with him than some rather dangerous and probably pissed off magical girl in her mid-to-late teens.

>>17726455
Magic use is pretty much a female-only thing. We're rare as balls on a dog.

>>17726338
>>17726333
>>17726307
>>17726293
>>17726287
>>17726278
>>17726272
>>17726247
>>17726237

You scrabble backwards, pressing your back to the wall, and eye the old watchmaker suspiciously.

"... fine. But it's still all crazy nonsense and hokum."

"BAH!" the wizened old German says. He raises the broom he used to push the dustbin over and advances on you. "Hold still, you are dusty!"

"I'm just fine!"

"NO, YOU AHR NOUT *FINE!*" He begins gently whacking you with the broom, knocking huge clouds of dust off your jacket and out of your hair. "hyou are YOUNG!

*whumph*

"hyou are AMERICAHN!"

*whumph*

"hyou are PILOT!"

*whumph*

"hyou are MALE!"

*whumph*

"So hyou ahr stupid FOUR TIME OVER!" he finishes, his accent slipping further the more worked-up he gets. "Now you go inside. Go! Go!" he says, literally brooming you towards the front door.

"How did you lock the door?"

"You were too scared to open it proper, moron!" he says, and pokes you with the broom for impetus. Sheepishly, you twist the knob, which yields without a problem and lets you into the shop again.

The two-dozen odd clocks are all ticking in time again, and you feel a shudder of apprehension go through you. It's nothing special, but... it's spooky as hell.

You jump a country mile when the broom clatters to the floor. The watchmaker gives you an exasperated look, then turns his "open" sign over and locks the door.

"To the office. To... noisy in here."

>>17726461
yeah, and pushing their buttons by intruding on their SPASHUL SNOWFLAEK territory seems just the theing we'd do, no?
>yes

>>17726484
we don't even need to use the magic properly, just piss people off with the fact that we have it.

>>17726472

>Stupid four times over

Oh god my sides.

Rings so true/

>The watchmaker gives you an exasperated look, then turns his "open" sign over and locks the door.

>"To the office. To... noisy in here."

I don't like where this is going

>>17726484
I don't think you seem to comprehend the difference between teasing the little girls and kicking an angry bear in the nuts. They must never know.

>>17726472
Sounds strange to hear him listing our Pros as if they are Cons....

>>17726513
he's just jealous.

We must figure out what he's talking about. Also this is our secret forever. We deny it even on our deathbed.

Right, so does this mean Sean actually has some sort of sixth sense for trouble? and what's Ian's ability? being able to put up with our ego?

>>17726533

Ian has the strongest ability, for sure.

>>17726550
Don't forget the "Ian Voice."

>>17726567
So his ability is making us give a fuck?

He must be a GOD

>>17726531
If we are going through with this whole You're A Wizard Pilot! Then this. No one must ever know.

>>17726472

The watchmaker ushers you into the back of the small shop, where a moderate-sized room houses the workbenches and tables where he practices his craft. Against one wall is a massive, stolid roll-top desk, covered with a massive pile of clutter, papers, and other things. A thick layer of dust coats all of it.

"I see you," he says, rounding on you. "Thinking." He taps your forehead. "Going to make joke about ze fastidious Teutonic peoples, no?"

"No," you lie.

"Shit of the bull!" he exclaims, turning back to the desk. Seizing a long-neglected feather duster, he bats at the papers vigerously.

"It's 'bullshit,'" you say.

"Of course. Englishman always say this to me, frown greatly. I say it wrong, that way they get mad twice, ja?"

Perhaps it's just because of your jangling nerves, but you can't begrudge the old man a laugh. "Yeah, I have to remember that one."

"So," he says, thinking. He points to a workbench in the middle of the room. "All zat shit, on bench over there, please?"

You oblige, clearing the bench as the old man digs a huge, leatherbound tome out from the roll-top desk. He drags the desk chair over, and you get the room's other chair for yourself.

Here planfag, have a present from me and Sir doodlefag

Wish for a sudden Martian raid.

>>17726583
>Tome
Oh fuck.

>"Shit of the bull!"

>finish s02e02
>hmmm time to check /tg/ again
>its back

Fuck year

I just wanted a fucking watch, Old Man. I didn't want vast, mysterious powers as subtle as they are potentially dangerous. I just wanted a watch and now we're in some dusty room with a big ass leather bound book that somehow looks even older than you are and you're being all LET ME TEACH YOU MY WAYS.

I am far too sober for this shit.

>>17726583
>Tome

ah fuck the suspense! its hurting me!

it'll be in German no doubt

>>17726583

Sir, I must insist, you keep all tomes, grimoires and dark bibles out of this. Such things are above my pay grade.

>>17726626
Don't we have a flask? How the hell do we not have a flask?

>>17726583
>>17726628
If it's written with blackletter we're out of here.
Can't read the fucking shit.

>>17726639
Stolen, remember?

Look, sir, I am WAY TOO SOBER right now. Do you have any 100 proof alcohol?

Seriously, are we getting that watch, or not? The magic I can learn whenever I fucking feel like it, I'm in a base full of magic users, I'm sure one of them can teach me, but the watch I need right now.

>>17726639
We may not, but its the 1940s, so we undoubtedly have cigarettes and a lighter, because everybody smokes.

>>17726584
Some Jackass keeps bumping the image thread, so I can't post the original. Here's a flipped version.

>>17726639
If we had a flask it would be because we stole it from Sean.
We don't have Sean's flask because Sakabroto already took it.

>>17726656

We are suppose to buy a replacement too.

Whether it goes to Sakamoto or Sean is up for debate.

>>17726650
>I'm in a base full of magic users, I'm sure one of them can teach me
oh fuck no! that's suicide

>>17726652
go for 3?

Look, guys, I think the moral of this story is that we should never, no matter how good of an idea it sounds like at the time, ever do anything nice for Minna again.

>>17726652
Sometimes, I hate 4chan

>Tome
Oh fuck no.
Figure out what he has to say and then never speak about it again.

>>17726650
Yeah, we already bought it. We managed to avoid breaking it when we dived into the dustbin.

>>17726675

I think the moral of this story is "Don't get stuck in clock shops with old german wizards". If we had gone anywhere else for a present for Minna, this would NOT have happened.

head down, mouth shut, dont get fucked.

Ask him about the coyote ears. We need to know about the coyote ears.

>>17726679
"YOU ARE SMALLTIME"

>>17726694
That seems like a much harder moral to manage.

>>17726698
>don't get fucked
or maybe...

>>17726712

No. The only one doing the fucking is us.

>>17726679
Is that... Is that what I think it is?

>>17726720
That's right, we're a pilot. WE do the fucking around here.

>>17726679
we need a .gif of this that has him shouting YOU ARE SMALLTIME

Even if it turns out we are A wizard. let's stay the fuck away from the striker units. That's just asking for trouble.

This is all very strange and terrifying. So, thematic music? Thematic music.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WpmILPAcRQo

>>17726734
2nd

>have 4chan x
>keep hitting f5 every 10 second anyways

>>17726583

You eye the huge, ancient, leatherbound book as the watchmaker lets it slam into the table.

"Is... is that a..." you stammer apprehensively.

"Oooooh yes many powerful spells in this tome, ALAKAZAM!" the watchmaker exclaims, flipping the book open dramatically. You flinch backwards, expecting all sorts of spectacular things, but see only pictures. The old man favors you with a jaundiced eye, and begins paging through the old photo album.

"Here." He taps one photo with a wizened old finger. "Conrad Brandt. This is I. Before the Great War." You examine a picture of a young man, younger then you are now, standing next to an ancient tractor, the kind that were little more then self-propelled generators. "My family's first machine. I fell in love with it, and they said it loved me. 'Conrad, Conrad,' they'd call, 'Come chase the devil out of the tractor!'" He chuckles a little, then turns the page. There you see the young watchmaker, looking smug in a shiny new uniform jacket, a K-98 Mauser cradled in his arm. "I refused the helmet for the picture," he says. "Fhaking spike. Vhat for? Stick your apple on it, save it for later?" He humphs, and turns the page, tapping another picture for your perusal. You see the young Conrad wielding a heavy wrench, chasing another young German man.

"Things were so different back then. A farm with a tractor was a rich farm. All the soldiers, so many came straight out of the farm fields. Did not know an engine from their own ass. I did. The aviators stole me from the field artillery so fast I thought I was being kidnapped."

"Who's that guy you're chasing?" you ask.

"That would be Immelman," he says. "He blamed my machine gun - mine! - for costing him his first kill. I told him, 'Conrad shall claim his first kill immediately,' and Immelman, he runs like the hounds of hell were after him." The watchmaker gives you a serious look. "They were."

>>17726679
Original over here: >>17716614
Thank Sir Doodlefag fror the drawing.

>>17726723
You better believe it.

>>17726734
Not like we could do anything with them anyway. Male wizardry isn't SHIELDS AND LEG WARMER PROPELLERS, it's just being fiendishly awesome with stuff - like us and machinery.

Shit, it may as well be our SWAG having a physical effect on the world. Chillax guys, we're not going to end up without pants and shooting fireballs off our asses.

>>17726734

unless the demographics of the thread shift dramatically i dont think thats a worry.

techpreists gonna techpreist.

>>17726734
It's also a dead bloody give-away. In our Super!Black Widow, all weirdness can A) Easily be attributed to coincedence and the experimental design, and B) have suspicion divided amongst the crew of three.

>>17726754
>CHASING IMMELMAN

I LIKE this bastard

>>17726754

>chasing Immelman with a wrench

...Grandpa is awesome

>>17726754
This man is WW1_German!us.

LEARN EVERYTHING YOU CAN.

Did we ever pick up that pitch pipe? If not we need to get around to that.

...You're all right, old man.

>>17726754
>that pic
>chasing fucking Immelman

oh god my sides

>>17726754

Oh FUCK no. Martians are bad enough. I will have none of this HPL/Mythos (Which we can totally no about from reading his stories in magazines when we were younger) shit. PAY GRADE. ABOVE IT.

Alright, that line about the helmets nearly made me choke on my nacho.

>>17726754
>Immelman
>Not a witch in this setting

Are you sure about that?

>>17726754
>Chasing Immelman with a wrench

And you people wanted to run away from this man.

Bromont, is that you?

>>17726807
>most decorated pioneer of air combat tactics
>wanting him to be a witch

So suddenly we're bros with the Wizard now?

FOOLS he could SPELL our DOOM. Or at least something else nasty for our careers. The fuck do they do with Male Witches around here anyway?

Could this recent development be connected to my Assault Wizards Idea?

BTW, last I knew; We were about to race the girl with the P-51's strapped to her legs, could someone give me the short/ sweet version?

>>17726831

Not a question of wanting, but Chuck Yeager is a chick with huge knockers in this already. I assumed there would likewise be some sort of Red Baroness and Blue Maxine thing going on.

>>17726861
Short version?

You've missed about four threads and need to catch up.

>>17726862
WWI would be before Witches were air combat though. Possibly before they even had strikers.

>>17726830
No, planefag hasn't given us LOL BAD ENDS and then continues the real story on green-o, I mean easymo, I mean, the goddamn archives.

>>17726861
Drag race, engine spins out, we scare everyone shitless and recover well at the same time.


Then we find the booze on the base (no O-Club) head to our base to pick up booze and gifts (currently aviator shades and pants for everyone) and we are getting whats-her-face-commander a watch.

Then every watch in the shop began ticking in unison once we entered

>>17726830
Bromont is probably working on his VN
>bwhahahah, can you even imagine? I can't even say it with a straight face

>>17726862

Strikers only came about in the 1930s. So that period would have been normal planes, only.

>>17726861
You missed a lot of threads, check the 'Chives

>>17726861
We were slower to start, but ended up gaining before the engine blew and we saved it with a near suicidal roll. Everyone freaked out. We gave no fucks.

>>17726807
Striker units were invented in the 1930s in universe. Brooms are smalltime.

>>17726877

Links?

Like you said, I need to catch up, seen what monster I helped (I think?) create.

>>17726831
Oh hey, Our request got filled
>>17716614
I was an idiot about posting so you may have missed it

>>17726754

"Yes, there is point to this, shut up," the watchmaker - Conrad - says before you can open your mouth. He turns through a thick sheaf of pages and shows you another set of pictures. "I come home to my village, I get apprenticeship to watchmaker. Many young men applied, but I was taken. The old watchmaker, he said, 'you love the machines.'" He turns the book around and lets you look through many pictures of a little watchmaker's shop on a village street.

"My little village, is deep in the Hugerten wood," Conrad says thoughtfully. "Perhaps that had something to do with it." He waves his hand idly, as if brushing away the thought. "Sometimes, I'd come up against something I could not budge - an escarpment that would fall apart at the slightest touch; some fine-tuning job I just could not make yield - and my master would come to the door, smiling wide, and say, 'Conrad, we go drinking!' And I would bitch all the way to the tavern and bitch all ze way back and he'd make sure to ditch me in my workshop."

Conrad pauses, and strokes his chin.

"He would wake me early, and shove something in my hands, and say 'we are behind Conrad, here is something simple till you wake up more.' And I would curse him in two tongues and start working, and find he'd put my impossible task from the night before in my hands. He taught me not to think about things, too much. I already knew it, but I could make myself stupid over-thinking, see?"

You nod slowly.

>>17726924
All the threads you've missed are in the archive. And there's been hints that the MC is magical since like the second thread. I wouldn't worry overly much that you're responsible.

>>17726925
Yeah, I was trying to post it to help you out, but somehow placing a black dot in a slightly black area didn't work, which usually does.

Its a great piece, saved it at the top of my strike witches folder

>>17726924
They're on suptg, last tread is still on the first page.

>>17726946

But we do that already. We are the masters of using our GIGANTIC BALLS instead of our brains.

So we are basically a techpriest now. Neat!

Couple things I forgot to mention last thread because of the cliffhanger, but now I can't remember them now.

>>17726946
"I have no idea what you're saying"

"See, you are already getting it!"

>>17726924
We also bounced perrine. As she was being a bitch.

All the threads so far: http://dl.dropbox.com/u/19602430/Strike_Witches_-tg-_quest.txt
Keep the link handy, I'll update it whenever a thread is completed.

>>17727009
And by 'a bitch' we mean 'pointed a loaded handgun at us'.

>>17727033
It was never actually pointed at us. She merely rested her hand on it.

We can't forget our theme song!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SdSj0_Fd4ds

>>17727052

Good enough.

>>17727052
she still choked us.

And we discovered she IS in to Erotic Asphyxiation.

That is she got really turned on when choking us

>>17727033
She didn't take it out of the holster, she did threaten us though.

>>17727033
And frenched her. Think we're cool now.

>>17727052

Really? I though she actually drew down on us. She was pretty pissed, and as a witch is way more valuable to the brass then we are, no matter how many accolades we've won.

w/e she did other things. I'm kind of surprised she hasn't taken out a rapier or something and challenged us to a duel.

>>17726982

Just so you guys know, my pc crapped out on me, and I'm on a DSI untill I can scrape enough to get it working again.

>TL;DR: I the closest you can get to a child's trike in computing terms.
Someone is going to have to post links because I think this willactually manage to have a STROKE if I push it too hard.

>>17727082
She seemed pissed about that part, so I'm not sure about that.

>>17727093

All threads are listed here:

http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=strike%20witches

>>17727093

Why would we care?

Fag.
http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive.html?tags=strike+witches

>>17727070
Why is our theme song so bad?

>>17727088
Because clearly she wants to fuck.

>>17727009
>Perrine
>being a bitch
Redundant much?

>>17727121

Because you have no taste.

>>17727121
Get the fuck out

>>17727093
Thank you, but this suspense is killing me. Can't you just give me a link to your blog?

>>17727133

Not necessarily. She was pretty helpful in the acquiring of the pants and the shades, and the fakeout!makeout was her idea.

>>17726946

"What the hell does any of this have to do with m- weird shit?" you ask, intrigued, but puzzled.

"One day, my master says to me, 'Conrad, when is the last time you wound your watch?' And I thought about it for ten seconds and could not answer. He would ask a question like that, very occasionally, that I could not answer, and one day we were working together in the shop, and four clocks ended up synchronized, like those out there did." He shakes his head, a strange look on his face. "Oh Conrad,' he says to me, 'good job timing the clocks.' And I ran from there like he was Satan come to tempt me. He had to drag me out of the Church by the ear, scolding me all the way home." Conrad sighs, shaking his head. "That is when he told me what I will tell you now."

"... what? I'm the clock whisperer? The ClockMan?" you say. You don't actually doubt him, but you're spooked as hell, and your coping mechanisms are not exactly diplomatic. You know this, but can't stop yourself anyways. "Dr. Timex von Tock? Fighting evildoers with weighted pocketwatches swinging on the end of four-foot long steel bobs?" You wave your hands in the air dramatically.

"Have you done things recently you cannot explain?" the old man says. "When others challenge you?"

You shut your smart mouth and put your hands flat on the table, trying to summon your best poker face.

"Naturally. Otherwise you would not have freaked out like youngest child of retard family, like I once did," Conrad finishes smoothly, and you feel your face flush.

"So. Uh. What did your master tell you?"

"He say to me, 'Conrad, you are a gnome!' and I punched him in the face."

>>17727104
I meant us to her, not the other way. Think we are even for now until she attempts to kill us again.

>>17726862
By making a great pilot a witch, you denigrate their achievements. It's easy for a witch to be good, with their magic and their leg engine things. For a mere mortal to match, or even best the sparkle girls, and to do it in a lump of iron, glass, and fire, steering with their hands and bits of wire?
-That- is true skill, and that is why the witches are small time.

>>17727135
>>17727143
If I wanted to listen to slow, drawling music I'd go to a Country and Western concert.

>>17727165
But I'm too tall to be a gnome

>>17727121
we have another one.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kyXz6eMCj2k

>>17727165
This guy. This fuckin' guy.

>>17727165

If grandpa is a gnome, i guess that makes his master...

/sunglasses

...a troll

>>17727165

>"He say to me, 'Conrad, you are a gnome!' and I punched him in the face."

Okay, in retrospect, I'm glad he used the w-word.

Also, goddamn planefag, so many good one-liners.

>>17727176

Let me guess. Metal?

>>17727165
>"He say to me, 'Conrad, you are a gnome!' and I punched him in the face."
I lost it

>>17727165
I love this guy...

>"He say to me, 'Conrad, you are a gnome!' and I punched him in the face."

>>17727165

The only logical choice is to now punch Conrad in the face.

>>17727203

Dis gai... is un-fucking-believable.

>>17727165

>>17727165
1. If he calls us a gnome, we punch him in the face.

2. We've done some cool shit when people have challenged us, but it's just cause we're really that badass.

>>17727201
That's better.

>>17727165
>Cant... breathe...

>>17727165
"You aren't going to call me a gnome are you. I would hate having to punch you in the face."

male witches thread? male witches thread!

>>17727165
>"He say to me, 'Conrad, you are a gnome!' and I punched him in the face."

>>17727165

You gape.

"He had a smart mouth. Chose a bad time to use it. I was freaked out," Conrad says pointedly. "He calmed me down, eventually, and made me realize that I never would have noticed the things I did, had he not pointed them out to me, specifically. Nor would he have noticed, said he, had his master not taught him."

You shake your head, confused. "No, I don't do things like that. I just... I'm good at certain things. I'm no mechanic, even - my ground crew certainly knows more then I ever will. I just... wrestle an engine into delivering power for a few more minutes, jiggle the controls to get her to turn over again. Just force of habit."

Conrad nods, smirking. "This is what I said to my master," he replies. "He said I would understand, in time." He jerks his head towards the crowded rolltop desk behind him. "In time, I did. History has many great stories of powerful Witches laying waste to their enemies, but mythology tells mostly of men - men, with ferocious skill and legendary weapons. Hrunting, Gram, Cortana, Durandal, and more. In how many tales were the dwarves creatures of industry... but also of magic, smithing it into steel blades bequeathed to great heroes? Gnomes, as well - always rumored to be mischievous, but with great talent for the mechanical."

"So I can match a lawn gnome as a mechanic. Great," you say, dubious, but you know the man is reading your nervousness like an open book. He merely smiles.

>>17727165

"I am glad you did not call me a gnome."

>>17727305

"Right, so. Assuming I am a "gnome" (Still not using the w-word) what happens now? Are you going to like, teach me your secrets or something? Because I still have shopping to do"

We're a gnome? We're a gnome...WE'RE A FUCKING GNOME

>>17727305
If he wants to call that magic, then ok, but it just makes him a kook.

>>17727305
So, assuming I am a gnome, what doe that fucking MEAN, And where can I get a drink I am way to sober for this shit

>>17727305

We fly planes. We don't use swords. We think you want one of our friend Sean. He's handy with a sword.

>>17727070
Ahaha oh god this is awesome.

What does this say about browning? Or that fellow who invented the short stroke mechanism for the garand, while in prison?

>>17727337
More like some kind of gnomish god mechanic

Welp, this is definitely doing on to the list of things that we must never mention.

I dread to think how our credibility would crumble if it we ever announced with a straight face that we were a gnome.

Well, it seems this version of wizards just means "Your plane gets a boost".

Basicly, witches are still better, but as the saying goes:

>"The flame that burns brightest, burns the shortest."

>>17727070
This would be a decent song if they didn't form the lyrics by torturing a cat.

>>17727305

"Yes. Lawn gnomes. Caretakers of all things green. Again, master of their craft." Conrad slams the old photo album shut forcefully, making you jump in your chair. He leans forward, and fixes you with his eyes, which are still a sharp, fixating blue despite his years.

"The magic of Men has always existed. It's as innate to us as the magic of women is to they - it just manifests differently, ja? It's as natural as breathing, so we don't notice - and even if we did, we have been encouraged and taught not to."

"But-"

"No buts!" Conrad exclaims. "You've heard the stories - probably lived a few yourself - a man with incredible luck, surviving something impossible. His skill is always commended, but you always attribute him luck, because without at least a sliver of it, he would have died. The danger was physically impossible for even ze greatest skill to overcome, so luck must have plugged the gap. Yes?"

You nod, reluctantly.

"And sometimes you hear the story, or recall the one that happened to you, and late, late at night, you think, 'luck, oh, what shit of the bull,' yes?"

You look away and an almost-forgotten foreboding shivers up your spine.

"Mechanics, we were the same way. 'Demons in the tractor,' indeed."

>>17727437
>The magic of Men has always existed.
Women get magic and fighter plane legs

We don't have to read instruction books to get things to work and we make them work well.

I'mokwiththis.png

"So about that paper you mentioned"

>>17727462
So we get knowledge (How shit works) in exchange for No Magic Spells

>>17727462
We also have the power of luck. I can very much get behind this.

>>17727437

I can accept this explanation. I will not quit the quest. Bravo!

>>17727462
>We don't have to read instruction books

>>17727486
What next? Will we always be able to find our way without a map or asking for directions?

>>17727462
Ok, so any idea how to make this a bit more valuable for me? One of those shields sure would be nice.

So nothing changed except now we know it's magic and not dumb luck.
Seems fine.

So women get the flashy stuff, men get the practical day-to-day stuff.

i am okay with this

>>17727507

Fuck you.

>>17727507
Screw shields we 'ave dakka and PLANES

>>17727507
No.

>Baron Timex von Tock
Planefag, thank you, I now have an awsome idea for my next character

I think I need some infofiber to go with this infodump.

>>17727525
UNLIMITED AMMO WORKS!

>>17727507
Why the hell would we want a shield when we have luck and balls of fucking steel?

>>17727437

You shake your head again, confused. "Wait, wait, this doesn't make any sense. If men had magic, we'd - well, we'd all be genius crafters of one kind or another. It doesn't add up."

"Bah!" Conrad says. "Are all men ace pilots? Are all men even capable of BEING pilots? Are all men the best at what they do, or even quite good at it? Even if its just one thing?"

"W-"

"Of course not!" He sighs, slumping into his chair.

"There's still more Witches out there then ace pilots," you object, but the words falter in your mouth. A lot of potential aces simply ended up flying cargo planes, or - like you, a few weeks ago - simply haven't found enough targets to demonstrate their skill against. It dawns on you that while exceptional men may be overlooked for any number of reasons, it's nigh impossible to miss the signs of a budding Witch.

"So... what's the difference? When do I stop using my innate skill and start using... m... mmmmm... mmmmmagic," you manage to force yourself to say.

"They are the same," Conrad says. "In all the books I read over all the years, going back to the Witches of Charlemagne, they say 'my magic comes from my soul.' It comes from your life. From your love. For whatever you do. Perhaps its part of everything we do. You cannot divide it up like this, here is skill, there is magic, line between!"

>>17727544
OY DATZ OONLIM'TED CHOPPY WURKS NOT DAKKA WURKS!

YOUZE IZ MUCKING ABOUT!

>>17727517
Hey, just posting what our MC would say. Spend a bunch of time around witches, finds out he has magic, but not as stupid powerful as the chicks get. Seems like something to be a little irritated about.

So we're not the Watch Whisperer, but we ARE the Pratt & Whitney Whisperer.

imokaywiththis.gif

>>17727507

No. First of all, its well established witches can burn out their magical powers with their flashy shit. Second, flashy shit is a quick ticket to god knows where. At out luckiest, they'll declare us a male witch, shove our naked legs in a striker and attach us to a Witch unit god knows where. Probably Orussia. Worst cast scenario, they do science to us.

>>17727554
>Magic

>>17727564
We exist in a world where rumours of male magic is ridiculed by the witches.

Why would we want something obvious?

>>17727592
>implying they could take us away from our turbo-supercharged plane without killing us

>>17727510
The plot thickens!

>>17727577

We are also the gun whisperer.

We need to take these Witches down from the inside. The INSIDE. I'm implying that we have sex with them.

Wasp whisperer

>>17727625
I like you.

>>17727592

that feel when given a pantless uniform and assigned to Sibera defense airforce.

>>17727623

Careful. The sweet spot for witches' power levels is 12-18.

>>17727623
Second goddamit.
We're pilots, if we are not getting our dicks wet then obviously something is wrong.

>>17727636
That feel when being reduced to eunuchdom via frostbite.

They'll find out about our magic eventually. You and I both know it.

>>17727636
>cold-related shrinkage forever
NO. WE HAVE TO KEEP THIS TO OURSELVES.

>>17727642
You say that like we take it into consideration.

>>17727650
DONT EVEN JOKE ABOUT THAT

>>17727648
>>17727623

Die.

>>17727636

Yeah, well, there are actually witches fighting on the Orussian front. I think the magic helps keep them warm, though. Since, y'know, they can also go to SPACE.

>>17727648
See the post above. We are A classy gentleman. No jailbait for us.

Does this mean John Moses Browning was a witch as well?

>>17727642
Alternate universe. Older witches exist in this setting.

>>17727653
Yes. After we have gone down doing a spectacular deed that turns the tide of the war and makes us a goddamned hero.

OR: the CO finds out and uses it as blackmail material

>>17727680
No. He was just a man of God doing the Lord's own work.

>>17727683
Isn't Minna 20?

>>17727671
They had to wear 3 or 4 layers of clothing.

>>17727554

You clutch at your head. "This is way too much information all at once," you moan. "I just - trying to process it-"

"Just like Immelman when I teach him engines and how to not fuck them!" Conrad gripes, his voice rising. "I still have a wrench around here, so slurp it up!"

"Uh." You shake your head miserably. "If we can use it without thinking about it, why *tell* me about it, goddamn it?"

Conrad grins. "Because in your whole life, you always constrain yourself to what you have been taught is possible and not possible. Your passion pushes you slightly past that limit. But now that you know physics has no final say... your potential is unlimited."

*************************

You leave Conrad's little watch shop in a daze, thinking. What he has said is politically explosive, insane, and flies in the face of all the evidence in human history.

It also makes a hell of a lot of sense.

Hell, your own Major. Frank Luke. The lunatic son-of-a-bitch made his mark as a "balloon buster," attacking observation balloons defended by perfectly zeroed-in anti-aircraft guns. Manfred Von Richerhofen, the legendary strategist, didn't survive the war, but that psychotic motherfucker Luke, who threw himself into each attack like a starving lion upon a pack of sheep... he did. Trusting utterly to his skill and his luck, which held, impossibly, every time.

Luck.

"Shit of the bull," you mutter thoughtfully, and shudder again. It makes sense. Too much god damned sense.

"Hey!" you hear a familiar baritone voice bellow from behind. Turning, you see Sean belting up the sidewalk towards you. "Check it out!"

You look at the front page of a newspaper, featuring a huge black-and-white illustration of Perrine french-kissing you as hard as possible

>>17727680

No, he was clearly a gnome. Like us.

>>17727680
>>17727690
See, that's the problem with all of this. It's like
>>17727175

>>17727648
Wizard + Witch = more witchy and wizardy babys....

Must do our part...

>>17727699
Wow, that paper publishes fast.

>>17727675
Well, there are a couple of legal ones. Do we compromise professionalism to fuck them or carry on as per usual?

>>17727699
>You look at the front page of a newspaper, featuring a huge black-and-white illustration of Perrine french-kissing you as hard as possible


I don't have any reaction images, but I want you to know that was funny.

>>17727699
So we're going to show that to Perrine, right?

>>17727699
WELP, IT WAS NICE BEING ALIVE.

SEE YOU GUYS IN THE AFTERLIFE.

>>17727699

alright, we cant go back to base. i say we steal the plane and haul ass for spain.

>>17727699

...THATT WANKER MPPPPP

>>17727699
Sean, not in the mood. Need Drink. Now. Urgently. Gotta wipe this from my mind.

>>17727699
Welp, we guessed the photo would be that. Her reaction to this will be hillarious. Does the castle get the news paper as well? Or have we dodged a bullet there?

>>17727694
Minna is 18, Mio is the oldest at 21 by the second season.

>>17727699

FUCK

>>17727723
>Do we compromise professionalism to fuck them or carry on as per usual?
>compromise professionalism
>professionalism

As if we listen to that shit of the bull.

>>17727699
FUCKING CALLED IT!
We have to show her a copy.

>>17727738

>>17727694
>>17727683

Yeah, but their powers peak during those years. Minna and Sakabroto are both on the way down from the power curve. 'Nother year or two and neither of them will be able to use shields and fly regular strikers at combat speeds.

(Actually, if we're following the strike witches universe close enough, depending on the date Mio might already be having trouble with her shields.)

>>17727699
Got an extra copy of that? I might be able to keep that french tart off of me with it.

>>17727710
Stop trying to dress your fetish up as a duty. Die in a fire.

>>17727730
Show Perrine? Oh my, no. We need to show everybody on base. And then loudly declare that we picked up the handcuffs she wanted.

>>17727770
She didn't have problems until season 2.

>>17727699
MOTHERFUCKER. IT WAS RAINING. AT NIGHT. AND WE DIDN'T SEE A FLASH. ITS THE 1940s. I CALL SHENNANIGANS.

>>17727699
WELP.

>>17727791
That's why it's an illustration.

>>17727770
What part of alternate universe are you not hearing here? Planefag has explicitly said that they don't work that way in this setting.

>>17727699
Well, shit.

You know what time it is?

RUN FOR OUR LIVES!!!

Alright, we got to grab everything left on the list in fast forward mode, and then get the hell back to base before Perrine sees this shit.

>>17727791

In b4 dickhole MP is a camera wizard

>Wanting to fuck any of the witches
>In a Strike Witches Quest thread
NOT HERE, GODDAMNIT. TAKE IT TO /a/.

>>17727699

ohbiyherewego.png

>>17727785

Actually, I thought there was an episode in one where neuroi beam blew through her shields and fucked her up pretty good. By the time of s2 her barriers can barely slow down mundane handgun ammunition.

>>17727699
First things first: has she seen it?

>>17727699
If she chokes us over this, we wallpaper the lounge and kitchen at the castle with copies of that front page. Also, inform anyone who mentions it how Perrine attacked us and show them the rape whistle we bought as a result. Also, buy a goddamn rape whistle.

>>17727699
>french kiss
I like this guy

>>17727818
Fuck yes.

>>17727805

Thank you. You are a good man.

>>17727818
This is a plan I can get behind.

>>17727802
When everyone is a wizard, no one is magic.

>>17727799

Must have missed that somewhere, chief.

>>17727699
We're gonna need a few dozen copies. Bring them back and leave them EVERYWHERE.

>>17727805

the fuck is wrong with you? they can't all be lesbians

>>17727805
>Implying we have to fuck witches
There are other humans with vagina's
>>17727699 we need to hightail it outta there.

>>17727805
>no sex in /tg/ quest thread
>papa-n present
You aren't around here much are you?

>>17727841
It was in one of the first threads.

Oh shit I've been sitting on this Messerschmidt blowjob reaction image from /k/ this whole time because I forgot I had it.

Put it to good use gentlemen.

>>17727818
This. >9000 times this.

>>17727848
Bribe Sakamoto into congratulating Perrine for getting a boyfriend.

>>17727598

You stare at the newspaper, a horrific, cold chill working its way through your body.

"Check out the headline!"

You check out the headline:

"BLACK WIDOW" CREW BAG FIVE MARTIANS IN ONE DAY, PILOT BAGS WHITE MAIDEN.

In smaller font, the sub-head:

HERO CREW DEFENDS CASTLE OF THE WITCHES, NOMINATED FOR DECORATIONS

The story on your crew occupies the entire front page. That, and the huge picture of you and Perrine. Her eyes are closed, and she's leaning into you without reservation. The picture was shot from the side, and the photographer knew what they were doing - despite the harsh light of the MP's spotlight, the picture is more then good enough for you to see our own eyes bugging out of your skull at the MP in the jeep, conveniently out-of-frame.

"Can you imagine?" Sean crows, holding the paper at arms length to admire it some more. "I'm getting this fucker framed. Panty-remover in a picture frame, man. And that picture. That fucking picture."

"Hey, Sean," you say, your head beginning to pound. "Do me a favor. Call me a gnome."

As Sean regards you quizzically, your eyes latch onto the cutline below the picture.

That son of a bitch.

THAT CHEEKY SON OF A WHORE.

"Courtesy of Major Frank Luke."

>Anything else to get in town? Perrine got the handcuffs on her own (bah-dum~TISH)
>Time to return to Castle Barin.
>FIND LUKE AND BUST HIS BALLOON.

>>17727818
We also need to buy that pitch pipe and the raw fish.

>>17727740
Hmm...
Them and Charlotte are probably our romantic choices. How old is Charlotte?

Shit! I had to leave for a bit and finally caught up.

I was right! Techomancy!

>>17727849
No, they're mainly jailbait. That's the issue here.

And anyway, what part of classy gentleman so you not get?

>>17727871
FIND LUKE

BUST HIS NUTS

>>17727862
Off topic, but when did you start tripping, man? Did somebody start posting bogus TES lore with your name or something?

>>17727871
Luke confirmed for photo wizard.

Now go buy handcuffs.

>>17727861

Fuck you. Get out.

>>17727871
Have we got the stuff for Yoshika and Sanya?

>>17727871
We need a rape whistle. It is said.

>>17727699
>a huge black-and-white illustration of Perrine french-kissing you as hard as possible
Perfect. We use this as extortion material. Hopefully the castle doesn't get regular delivery service.

Alright, so let's grab the other stuff on the list. We have watches, booze, and aviator shades to deliver.

>>17727871

so that means we just need the fish, the schnapps and the pitchpipe right?

lets get em. yoshika helped us find our mates, sanya is gonna be our wingman most of the time, and trude has been pretty cool. should get them their shit.

>>17727874
This. Also leave Luke behind. Asshole.

>>17727871
CIGAR CHOMPING SON OF-

>>17727871
>FIND LUKE AND BUST HIS BALLOON.

That sounds completely and utterly wrong.

>>17727871
That son of a bitch! We must find him!

>>17727871

REVENGEEEE

We Abscond with as much of Luke's room and his clothes as we can to the castle with us.

>>17727871
Oh that bastard. We're getting him back, even if it's the last damn thing we do!!

>>17727871
Finish our shopping, then balloon busting.

>>17727871
Finish the list. Also chocolate. Tons of it. Then eat it in front of the witches because we give no fucks

>>17727871
If we have everything we came for, lets head back.

Captca: whortand visits

>>17727883
We don't have romantic choices, this isn't a fucking VN.

>>17727871
>>17727802

FUCKING CALLED IT. Sort of.

Buy condoms. Use them to troll.

Wanting to fuck Witches was not our goal for this thread. That might not be the case for Papa-N, but this is an entirely different quest thread.

In case you forgot, our goal was to teach the Witches to be hardasses (Minna's already got that down) who all wear pants and aviators.

>>17727871
>Anything else to get in town? Perrine got the handcuffs on her own (bah-dum~TISH)
This
>>17727874

>>17727874

and peppermint schnapps.

>>17727871

Mint Snacpps(?), Pipe and the rest of the stuff the girls wanted.

The we BOUNCE LUKE

>>17727915
And silk robes.

>>17727871
Buy rape whistle, anything else we forgot, then find Luke, call him a gnome, and fuck his shit up.

>>17727871

>"Courtesy of Major Frank Luke."

That magnificent motherfucker...He should write a book. We'd have to read it.

>>17727971

perrinne is actually here with us, she can get it.

>>17727915
>schnapps
Oh crap, forgot about that. That's supposed to be the tricky one.

Let's go back to the German guy. He's German, if there's any within fifty miles, he'll know.

Let's just strafe his office.

>>17727871
The man is some kind of photography ninja.

Right, well, no need to hunt him down. We just direct the flow of witchy wrath in his direction.

>>17727945

whoa hey I'm not in for that here!

save it for my quest threads

>>17727987
with the rest of the witches

>>17727940
This is STRIKE WITCHES quest. Not WW2 FIGHTER PILOT quest. There will probably be romance.

HOME AGAIN. HOME AGAIN. JIGGITY-JIG.

We need to play Santa Claus and troll Perrine.

>>17728005
We're taking our time of it.

Just throwing it out here.
We have a fuckhuge shopping list, but nobody remembered to buy some cigars?

We probably need to get that silk robe and stethoscope if we haven't already.

Deliver them to Perrine in a wrapped box. with a copy of the newspaper inside. Vacate the area before she opens said box.

>>17728005
Fuck romance
Acquire hard-asses

>>17727987

>>17728013
On the subject of Santa, can we scrounge up a Santa hat? If only so we can call Perrine a ho multiple times to her face and get away scot free?

Personally against sticking it in any of the witches. But if you guys can't help it, keep it above the age of consent atleast .(17 in England I believe).
No pedophilia

>>17728005
>>17728015

Put them back in your pants. Hands on the desk.

>>17728005
>There will probably be romance.
Of the gay variety. Between witches.

if there is a romance subplot anywhere i have full faith that planefag will handle it without faggotry or retardation.

praise planefag!
faith in planefag!
trust planefag!

>>17728005
It's a pilot quest first and foremost. The witches are just a backdrop for our badassery, and need not be bothered with.

>>17727984
>Nope.avi
She was called back to base

>>17728029
What is this .gif from anyways?

Since Perrine was the one who jumped us in front of the MP, has anyone considered that she was in on it?

>>17728044
What? When?

>>17727901
Different guy, there's a number of alpharius on the board. I trip to get omegon into the name as it ammused me, no other reason.

>>17728015
>2 days in-game
>Have kissed Perrine
>Bought gift for Minna
Yep, we sure are taking our time.

>>17728046
Nah. It's not in her nature. This will embarrass her more than us.

Step 1. Find Luke, murder him and hide the body.
Step 2. Find the Schnapps. Whatever it takes
Step 3. Return to Castle Barrin and pray to god none of the witches saw that picture.

>>17728046
Why would she?
This is gonna hurt her more than it hurts us.

>>17728066
12 threads.

>>17728043
Then why are they there at all?
>inb4 the shouldn't be

>>17728065
Ah, gotcha.

>>17728046
Yeah, I don't see her liking this much.

>>17728022
We got the stethescope. Need fish, robes, and schnapps.

>>17728043
Except to harden them the fuck up. Aviators, pants, and giant egos all around.

>>17728084

To show them up.

>>17728084
They're there so we can upstage them and subvert the whole magical sparkle girl thing they've got going on in the proper series.

>>17728084
Well, you see, the Witches serve as a contrast. They're magical girls who have to rely on their magic to make them effective whereas we're just a badass pilot who manages to go toe to toe with them solely on our skill rather than having to rely on magical abil... Oh wait, nevermind. I don't know either.

>>17728046
Probably not on this one. SHe has a raging hardon for Sakamoto.

>>17728079
Well, in that case, we need to make damb sure Sean or Iain don't take a copy back.

wait, can you even wear aviators while flying a striker unit? wont they blow off?

>>17727871


"Has Perrine-"

Sean grins. "Hot off the presses," he says. "The truck doesn't drop these off at the PX until tomorrow, remember?"

He's right. Local papers don't deliver to the base until the day after, if that. Generally one copy comes in and is passed around the mess or the O-Club if it's got any relevant war news in it. Or the latest ball game, before all the players enlisted.

You latch onto your seething fury at Luke and use it to override all that gnome magic bullshit. "Well, screw it. We've got a few other things to get."

"Ian already got that pitch pipe. Said he'd pick up some sheet music while he was at it." Sean shrugs. "I didn't even know there was a music shop in town. Or whatever they call them. Instrument boutique? I don't fucking know."

"Whatever. You know how to buy fish?"

"Give the fishmonger money?"

"Yeah. Try to get a few of each."

"Fish?"

"No, fishmongers. I want a tall one, a skinny one, and one uglier then you. Tall order, but I have faith in you."

Sean gives you a good-natured snort, takes your money, and heads for the docks. Perrine said something vague about "having a line on the handcuffs," earlier, so there's just one thing left to get.

That silk bathrobe.

Silk, during a global war. Hmm.

>Old girlfriend has one...
>We could actually try the tailor...
>There's this 'gentlemen' in town who can get you anything, if you can find what he needs in exchange...

>>17728115
WITCHES!

>>17728093
and pitch pipe

>>17727871
is this among our records from the barracks?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IcadPLBH0b0&fmt=18
probably not -> acquire in town! ericas face will be glorious.

>>17728109
See, that's why this whole male witch thing is such bullshit. It ruins the whole point here.

>>17728081
So romance isn't the main point. It should still be there though.

>>17728108
Can't we do both?

Is there an archive link to previous threads?

>>17728116
>There's this 'gentlemen' in town who can get you anything, if you can find what he needs in exchange...

Quest chain! Quest chain!

>>17728079
>>17728113
no no no, we're going with this
>>17727818

Tailor.

Normally I'd go for shenanigans, but we should probably try the tailor. Especially if you want one that fits.

>>17728116

the gentleman from town.

>>17728116
Parachutes

>>17728116

Tailor for silk

GENTLEMAN for Schnnaps

>>17728116
Try the taylor. The more legit this operation remains, the quicker we are likely to get back in our bird and back to work

>>17728116
The Schnaaps, man! Trude has priority over Perine's stupid requests cause she's not a bitch.

>>17728141
Just search suptg for strike witches. it takes 10 seconds..

>>17728163
You mean, take some of the parachutes to the tailor to be made into a proper robe?

>>17728116
Getting it from our old girl is too easy.

Find the shady man, give him what he wants.

>>17727818
Do you guys think we could make a detour the to printhouse and maybe get a stack of pictures? Or a stack of newspapers if that isn't possible.

They could come in handy!

>>17728116
Try tailor and enquire about prices

>>17728116
Try the Tailor first.

If that fails, then to the "Gentleman".

Also Schnapps.

>>17728177
Yeah, It would work.

>>17728116
Lets try the tailor. We don't need to be giving blow jobs to some dude in an alley. Old girlfriend is a second good choice. It could stir up drama for us to not give a fuck about.

>>17728116
Tailor. Who else would have cloth?

>>17728163
>>17728177
WE'VE DISCUSSED THIS!
WE ARE NOT FUCKING WITH THE 'CHUTES!

>>17728138
No, fuck you. Getting the MC laid won't do anything to help your own virginity, so stop trying.

>>17728137
Yeah, when planefag posted the last thread's ending I was hoping this thread would make it less retarded somehow.

But NOOOOOO..

>>17728116

>old girlfriend

OH FUCK NO. She has probably seen the paper of us making out with a 16-year old girl.

>>17728171
seconding this

>>17728116

we need schnapps to you silly git.

also, [x]tailor

we could get him to cut up a parachute. not ours though. maybe Ian's.

>>17728183
this and the rape whistle are priorities

>>17728196
Stopping the MC from getting laid won't help yours

I thought we already had the schnapps.

>>17728196
But I like projecting, and a self insert me fucking little girls is pretty enjoyable.

>>17728137
Nah, we are still an asshole pilot, and we are still going to slap some alium's shit, but now we know one of the mechanisms through which we do so.

>>17728224
That doesn't make any sense.
And again, GTFB2/a/.

>>17728137
> they say 'my magic comes from my soul.' It comes from your life. From your love. For whatever you do. Perhaps its part of everything we do. You cannot divide it up like this, here is skill, there is magic, line between!"

>>17728195
We have access to dozens back at the airbase.

activate fetch quest

>>17728224
>>17728228

Die. Both of you. Or go back to /a/.

>>17728227

the other night pilot said he could probably get some in the morning but we just went straight to the watchmaker so we dont have it yet.

Schnapps and tailor.

No further shenanigans in town. Finding out that we have Teutonic gnome magic was quite enough for one trip.

>>17728209
If the parachute is damaged or otherwise fucked, then fine. But no way can we destroy a perfectly good parachute and still call ourselves a pilot.

>>17728241
still bullshit, man. I'm disappointed

>>17728262

Then gtfo.

Tailor is the only not stupid option.

>>17728260

Yeah. This.

Tailor, do not fuck with parachutes.

Also cannot forget the Schnapps, more important than the robe and probably easier to find.

WE. DO NOT. FUCK WITH PARACHUTES.

Just because we're magic now doesn't mean we can break the sacred trust between the pilot, and the only thing that keeps him from a horrific inertia induced death when he hits the ground.

Course, now that we now we have magic, we can make physics our bitch.

Even more of our bitch at any rate

>>17728245
>>17728237

Old girlfriend because it might shed light on our past. Did we walk out of the womb as a certified planetary badass or did the girlfriend shape us into an alpha?

>>17728308
A.

>>17728299
We aren't going to give it to a pilot to use, so it will be fine.

>>17728307
I don't get it.

>>17728308
We are a pilot. You are issued a giant ego upon getting your wings. Hell, you get that before the flight suit or the aviators, even.

>>17728307

So they banned you in fuckland and now you have to come shit in here? Just die.

>>17728308

She is going to shape us into a corpse if we come around a few hours after she sees us making out with a little french girl on the front page of the paper.

Why don't we jack old girlfriends robe, and then bring it to thew tailor. Save material costs.

>>17728352
Which probably the reason planefag listed it as an option.

>>17728335
We only need one robe, not the 20 odd that a parachute could make. It'd either be a waste of fabric, or we'd be endangering another pilot by leaving an unsafe chute around.

>>17728352
I like this idea, seems funny.

>>17728347
>cant read

>>17728335

So we're just going to waste war materiel? During an alien invasion. Nay, we should check with yon tailor first.

>>17728338
>>17728347
Everyone on 4chan likes anime. Only some will admit it.

>>17728366


offer the tailor the rest of the chute as payment for actually making it. he can use it to make whatever and sell it.

...but where to snag a chute.

>>17728366

Why not make 20 robes then? One for each of the witches! It would be glorious! They will not know what to make of it, or they will appreciate the gift.

>>17728377
>can't think

>>17728378
>Yon tailor
>shop open to the public

BUYING A SILK BATHROBE FOR HIS MAIDEN oh god the fucking newslines

>>17728391

I like anime, you retard. I just don't want to devolve this quest into The Fuckening.

>>17728366
The solution to that is to make 20 or so ad gifts. Though I agree that destroying a parachute is sacraligious

>>17728393
Well, we know where to take a chute from. The stores are notoriously shittly guarded back at base.

>>17728404

You raise a good point, my good man. Maybe we should skip the drama and check with the GENTLEMAN first. If he's to pricy, we'll nick out ex's.

>>17728421

Parachutes are in short supply. If we take one, odds are we are FUCKING OVER A FELLOW PILOT IN THE WORST WAY WHICH IS SOMETHING WE DO NOT DO.

>>17728404
Just for that alone, yes to the tailor.

Where is our Glorious Leader (planefag) anyway?